« Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

LIVE: Andrew Zimmern

2019-10-24

Armchair Expert Live from Minneapolis at the Orpheum Theatre. June 29th, 2019.

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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hands and knees trying to breathe in between the dry, Heaves amazing coffee afraid that if a drink, some is probably come right back out me couple a bill, relax and sheer at a standstill with how bad, let's get fucked up and be ready to leave
like the last time that sources the answer, but I can still pre with my memories in food, a grass he's not here I was doing when I wrote this. Closest Rei,
I woke up this morning was judgement day, scan your bill. There were people wording, Chattanooga This happens using your body or party like it's nice, to see
he's my god. What a welcoming thank you so so much so I love you Gail, I'm embarrassed not spend a ton of time in Minneapolis. The reason being is I'm from Michigan and it's the exact same fucking state, so you
These are the land of ten thousand legs and we are the great lakes we have Motown. You have Paisley park. Is this same shit? So I came here really or the Superbowl couple years ago, year ago, eighteen months ago, whatever not warm here in February, I had a friend staying at hotel four blocks away and was like not a problem, I'm from Detroit big big problem on block two. I was like, they're, gonna fucking me cry of genetically frozen here, and I say this in seriously when I was here last time- and you know I'm not pandering to you. If you listen to Pakistan have brought it up several times. I was absolutely bowled over with help. Unbelievably lovely you guys all are it's truly from the bottom of my heart. I can't think of a place I visited in these fifty United States. Were the people were nicer. It's incredible. I thought I thought Peter.
Hausa was like an anomaly, but now he's dead normal for the twin cities. It is important to me that when we come to these towns we don't just bring another l, a person and I'm a disgusting la person and we're just visiting. I like to have someone that is really represents the area, so just what do you think of that when I introduce our guests tonight, but before I do that I have a very good friend who's, not from the twin cities but she's from Duluth Georgia she's, my soulmate she's, brilliant she's, powerful she's miniature
Oh man, we love you. Weis on the friendliest people in America right now get to flatten here. There's a traffic jam of people trying to help them change. It here s. Do you guys get a nice off here? I bet so well rounds of. Thank you cards and we have had a blast. We ve been travelling around the country in our crisis, Pacific, oh yeah, I made many many wrong turns leaving Chicago today. Take us a while to get to the airport.
Oh here is also a city not just in airports. If you Herr into Google, you may end up in industrial complex looking for aeroplanes. Now you now and then you gonna, put their pacifica through its paces. Would any of it yeah six thousand our opinions, the rest of the ride. It was glorious in nice Van my roommate smoking. The bandit it would be with a pacifica kind of handling and performance eyewitness today or was brought to everyone from. Lol. I want to thank the kind folks at lazy boy, lazy, boy, donuts, all the stuff and then we can go to habitat for humanity. So So thank you, lazy boy. Okay, back to my point about the guest He is a famous chef. He is a teacher. He is a tv
Gianelli's a journalist, he's Andrew Zimmern. I can only pray that the front row gets a whiff of Andrew cuz he's. Sounds like a trillion dollars. fragrance. Are you? Oh? Oh, you do smell nice why Thank you. It's actually a funny story, how you smell, yeah, I never used to wear a scent. And then something happens to you. It will happen to you soon. Where is it always and you get to a certain age and you can't help but do dead things and dad jokes and dad stuff and I was in a store in europe- and I have like fifteen minutes on the street to shop where shooting a show
and I was in a little french village and I went to this little boutique and These are cool socks, so I got like three of those and I t shirt and then lady. That was just like little like bottles with with wax dripping. Oh okay and like hand house of Stark labels all laid out on this little tray- and I was like within the lady who was helping me was I put a little bit on my pc paper and waved and then made me sniff grounds and then I was like. Oh my god, that's like the best smelling stuff. I'm so is a little bottle went to check. I handed them my card and The lady says to me: that's six: Thou in eight hundred euros about million dollars, America and it was. It- was actually so much money that my first instinct,
like oh gosh. You must have made a mistake, as I only have three per. A child's t shirts, and this bottle, was their ground up diamond than at all. You know it's baby force. Can I realized- First of all, you dont make perfume of children's for skins. You eat the you re right when you're in Madagascar. Where have you been? If you done that before was passed to me. What is it? devil. Why should I wasn't expecting they get a yes to ITALY? Three, then, you are not a traditionally in Sokolov, a culture which are the indigenous tribal. People live in the southern half of Madagascar, a lawless country. If ever I mean literally a lawless country at five years,
there's a ritual circumcision ceremony which I think is about four years and fifty one. We lay tat yes as someone whose experience this before and thankfully doesn't remember it, and this five robe with it the maternal grandfather supposed to eat the force skin like this is a cycle of a thing, but the maternal, and Father decided that the honoured, should have it was passed to me to eat and I was told this might happen and you don't want to insult. Be a better guess than a smarmy asshole Tvo's, and I Serta predicated my career. on that and join in the deep. Well, I mean it's. What am I gonna do say. No! This is the biggest moment in this family's life and they're, going to share this with me and thank goodness,
The paternal grandfather hated the maternal grandfather, snatched at my hand, and I witnessed mouth as if to say like screw you, then I realized, I was in the middle of a Hatfield, Mccoys thing all: can everyone started fighting and we literally ran out of this party. I die grass and this puts he did you handle the bill when it came here? Why would she said to me it's this stuff and I was well. Is it worth it? Is it worth it? Is it worth it, and one of my video refers was with me and he was like dude, you smell, really good, and so I got it Now it's the most expensive addiction that I have. No, that's not true. I ve developed a guitar addiction. Ok of late do you play
You got to know so. Here's here's the thing I play five times a year, but You know what has you will also find out when you're older? That's what hundred you will start collecting, you will start collect. things that you don't use that much, but that your kind of obsessed every time you read that famous. sweetheart quote that's like who have dies with the least toys wines which I love and then you feel very small and feel like you, ve made to me mistakes in your life, but then you realize I'm old fuck. It and ragged ties ship sailed. There are people who whom nobody the US in Laos and their friends of mine here their colleagues at my work, who are as in love with your podcast, is,
We lost a lot of time. It's it's amazing. It's really magical! I can relate to it for a gazillion reasons, sure, but they wondered one of you and I were going to literally share a bubble of Spain space to get ass. Yes, it'll it'll of all grow. It again. I'm not scared at all, but that bill moment just immediately took me back cuz, my wife and I were invited as guests of a designer to the met ball in New York with something I did not want to do. So? The designer had put us up at the Mandarin Oriental in New York City, so we're checking in my wife and I and we decided like- will it be ready for his plane ticket? Let's take two extra days right, so I say to the person at the front desk
Add two knights to this reservation. She's like oh, no problem! Mrs shepherd! Yes, we'll have you out on Thursday them and I go great Gregory. That's right, How much is it a night is two thousand eight hundred dollars a night, and I go so will not be staying, two extra nights and then I got really bad. I'm gonna go we're very wealthy, because I was so you really did. I was just being five fucking grand to take two naps know your way, I'd sooner by your perfume than do that direct look at in an Iphone to the thing in this. By the way, this has been one of my chips on my shoulder that you can address, because you have made a living, fine, dining in it in a career out of it in one of the chips on my shoulder, the kind of classes thing is like I hate it. When I go to these restaurants- and I felt like the server was looking down.
Me like he. He was a billionaire and I was a fool for wanting to use my fork with my left hand, I was like hold on buster unless you on this whole chain. It's all my issues I recognise, and yet I always like people think I'm doing it with the server, but there is a little bit of a snooty right now in my majesty, all of it or some of it, I'm not sure that you're not spot on correct and I'm not I'm not trying to co sign. Your bullshit is about unemotional transaction, not a financial transaction and people. Try to predicate the history of the restaurant business it started in France in the 18th century were the great chefs came out of the the houses of royalty in begin to open. Yes, that's true in France,
in Japan. Restaurants have existed since the fourth or fifth century. In ITALY, they they predate palm pay, while in I believe in the caravans of what is now the Levant. The Middle EAST hospitality In exchange for We should all safety and food given Fridley MN leader in markets being paid for is thousands and thousands of years old, but mistakenly in in the modern world and assessed- we in the west. What has happened? Is people have forgotten about the general transaction, and so therefore there is an element. It's not abuse What it is is it's not being as several said fully responsible for the guy happiness while you're in there under their roof? And if you going to be in the hospitality business? You need to be responsible for someone's happiness while they're in your building, and that starts from the phone call
all the way through, and so, if a waiter I eat, if I one more restaurant somebody says to me. Chef suggests. The cucumber sorbet is your third course. analyze me because I've ordered you know the Semifreddo I'm just like the suggestion and you're a building. If you don't reminder that, maybe I've made a mistake, a ton of credit, because there's nothing worse, a bad. Service experience for a guest is not half as bad as a bad yes dear experienced by asserting grabbing. We ve all seen that in the restaurant when we're there and that's just oh horrifying yeah I've given some real bad service. In my day, we're do we was California Pizza, kitchen in Brentwood California,
am I issue with this place was because it was in Brentwood. The folks that live there that are very, very wealthy were absolutely appalled. You couldn't make reservations, it was unacceptable and they were picture me at my host and about how uncivil this was and then my hand, unlike the fucking pizzas, nine Now, there's one really quick funny thing: think of those foreigners, eight anyways! When I worked there, I got a review after three months. My manager and took me to his office and get all these categories he's going through I'm going through them and get the punctuality everything's out of town he goes. Ok punctuality gave you seven just great and then for appearance, and I got old andean I've, been fifteen minutes early to every single shift and we appreciate it and I go. How does one get ten like an hour earlier illegals, woman,
I guess you know it's. Your first reviewing want to give you some to aspire towards, and I was like there's nothing objective. about this review. It's just to me into doing some more staff and in mom, and I had like an existential or some kind of a moment and I go Dan. I think I'm going to California pizza kitchen. Thank you and we didn't finish the review. I basically quit. I laughed. Go out. That night get hammered wake up the next morning on my message machine I missed the call from Dan hey dances Dan at California, pizza kitchen, The mole on this over and look of unwilling go to an eight unpunctuality. You can come in and take your three shift and I didn't you- have an incredibly fascinating story. Your story starts in New York, you're born in a jewish household. What I couldn't find out about you in my room
which is what did mom and dad do. Circus people Your mother was the hairy woman in your dad. Is she was but not famous for it, my mom and dad met and corded in the 50s. My Father wanted a son. You want to be a dad more than anything in the whole world he had lied about his age, had gone off to fight and world were to join. The navy had come back to New York City, smart guy. He gone to Bronx High School of science and when he returned on the troop carriers he gun into New York Harbor and the Ivy League schools had big thick applications. The way they do now and the big midwestern state schools have like a postcard church. So my father,
like the postcard that you had to fill out for Wisconsin was the smallest okay from Madison or, and so my my dad was a badger. Is it those about. So he came back. He helped start a big advertise. In Egypt, see in New York. We do yeah pretty in the sixtys in the fifties, so mad oh one, who in two thousand percent and some little bit. You know- Jerry in the business and create a lot of really famous ads and was one of the one of them. The famous ones in the sixties, drinks changed. It went from being like whiskey and soda to a margarita Marguerite is became popular sangree, it became popular, and there was The line of mixers Tonic club, soda ginger ale, made by a little company and he had decided that were they
decide they were going to go out of business. They really couldn't they put out one last desperate are F p because nobody was using mixers, ginger, ale, tonic and club soda in dry anymore anymore, because they making people making fancy bloody, Marys and margaritas, and they literally tanking and that little company with dry. My dad came up with an ad campaign called not too sweet. He said don't sell it as a mixer sell. It is a beverage where you pour it over ice sure and ginger all kind of lifted off and my dad always whenever people he heard people ordering ginger ale, didn't matter what brand in a restaurant or saying he's like I made I made that anyway, he met my mom. They dated they fell in love, they had me was an artist in New York and design windows for
stores and stuff like a pre, thriving business. I just liked it because one of the guys that works for her early on with a guy named Mark Beneke, who was the opening door man at studio? Fifty four, so my friends and I could go to you fifty dollars when you are high school? That was, I saw that is my mother's. Contribution to my growing up. First when I was six and dad had fallen in love with the great love of his life. Another man named Andrei Laporte, oh get out, so I had to day what a fund were I to dance when I always found sort of it I mean I've got, you know is a way, my dad's story, to tell he and my stepfather have they finally got married, and it was wonderful that they got to spend the last three years married. My father was a very closeted big. Tough, like conquer the world greatest generation. My stepfather was a diminutive french painter.
Oh and, and the two of them just sparred at each other. I'm Andrew my stepped on step, was Andrade, my their housekeeper stripper that they had befriended. they liked. I bet I leave. You ended up an alcoholic strategy I manage and how they they a friend of this woman at a Strip club in she. She told them her tale of Woe and said this is why I'm a sex work. I just got- it- is you're going go to why they were at a strip daylights emails. This is this. Is this is the greatest thing of all time? They would be they very frankly we're very front one of the things they like to do for was go with all their friends all same sex couples to these big strip. Clubs that was a one night work that is a fun night. If I know very similar, my desire to see thunder from down under make gummy sense yeah. I just want to young the those are tear away. Aren't they
again behind the stripper became rent ran their house and her name was Andrea, so was Andrew, Andre and Andrea was just it was. I had the most wonderful childhood in He weighs and a lot of different advantages, but my mother, she had a horrible accident hospital in nineteen. Seventy four she went in bikini, bikinis became popular and low cut became came into vogue the summer of seventy three and Somerset before my mother decided that the appendix star that she had from the 1930s with something that she want to have plastic surgery and have it removed and they gave her the wrong anesthesia during the surgery and she was in a coma. I came home from summer camp and my whole life had changed. And you know my mom was gone and my dad was,
in downtown. With my step. Dad, which was fine with me, I was new, would accept it. Wasn't a big deal to me, my except that actually loved me in a very actual way and was actually the parents who believe in me the longest, maybe because he wasn't my bio perish, he was the one who always, said when I was out there we he'll come back. He'll come back, come back when I found my mom in that condition. You know we had a charge at the drugstore, because you could do that in those days with a charge. The liquor store, because you could do that in those days you are allowed to go. Get your parents, the current cigarettes. On couple fifty I shall I I tried especially growing up in our neighbourhood and the Upper EAST side, and when you called down hey, it's the Zimmermann send up whatever, and I tried drugs drinking with my cousins drugs by last year's summer. Camp smoke. Pie really didn't think But when I got home that summer, with a father to Father's living
Our town, an empty apartment, living with housekeeper, where's, my mother, and up in an oxygen tent in a coma? I so desperately didn't want to feel was feeling- and I knew the best way to get rid of the way I was feeling was in the medicine cabinets and the liquor, cabinets and stuff- throughout the house. So that is what I said was ass course. That was the summer that I turned thirteen and so things very quickly devolved end. You know by the time I graduated high school. I was you know, weekend, hallucinogenic bonvivant, I was a daily drinker, a daily pot, smoker a daily coke user. I tried heroin and fell in love with it new years Eve of my senior year in high school. So I became your pretty much your standard New York
garbage head and held it together for ten years until I quit hard drugs, because everything was wrong with my life, I couldn't maintain relationships ever wanted a banded me. I was a user of people in the taker of things and I didn't want to be that anymore. So the answer was quit drugs. They were illegal and I did but the problem was. I didn't realize that was so much stronger than all that other stuff combined in my system. When you took away the drugs- and I went just on the booze- I mean I couldn't even keep life together. I went homeless and you know trying to kill myself, and I want some friends had an intervention for me and put me on a plane and loving people of the great state of Minnesota, gave me my
I bet you are you: are you into Hazel them right? One, seven years, six months and a day ago wow congratulations, amazing, they tune for more lives. Show after this exciting commercial break your supported by square space, my goodness, what a beautiful website one can create on square space. I make a good product all they do and to make it so easy. Now, armchair, expert, pod dot com was designed by Wabi Walk on square space. There's a trillion reasons you might wanna website,
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Gee than life figure, in so many ways and I knew at a very early age. I was going to be involved in food. When I turn fourteen, my parents said you have to get a job. My parents had to women two of my eye to eye it's a fairy godmothers and I read in Maggie were couple that had opened a restaurant on Montauk Highway in the late sixties, called the quiet clam I like my clam noisy but that society, what which was a great name for a restaurant. You know seafood restaurant with Irene and Maggie owned and they said we ll give him a job, and so five nights a week. My mom would drive me there and I ran or Maggie would drive me home cuz, their house was just passed ours and that's when I fell in love with the restaurant business and I fell in love with that clickity clank of the
in time it coming across the lawn and the nightly theatre of restaurant. I just I fell in love with every single thing about it, and and looking something in giving pleasure to someone that way to me was one of the great joys of my life and love it. I ever got just a couple curiosities: one: is both parents work a ton right so as much as you adore them. Could they ve been around a little more for your liking? Well, my mother spend years six months in the US, seven years in a mental hospital, and I ended up being the parents in that relationship is very dysfunctional sure it took me de well. Four years ago I tried it once or go somewhere to work on my emotional sobriety, okay, and did an intimacy workshop a men's trauma workshop at the meadows. They have these workshops that you and you can really dive deep on this issue, and I was there first
day one in the guy was leading the men's trauma. Workshop was like you were traumatized by the abandonment of your father, and I was like. Are you fucking I'm twenty four years sober I've worked on this and inventory the crap out of it. That baby is in a box with a bow. in the attic dealt with, I wasn't from TAT he was the greatest man in horror. He was my hero. I had him on a pedestal. Fifteen minutes later, I'm sobbing hysterically bad, be here. I have the same thing with my mother gave it. The truth of the matter is that you can love someone you can put them on a pedestal. You can worship and idolized them in the men adore them and, at the same time, coming to grips with the fact that at that point in his life intentional or not, and I believe it was unintentional. I believe parents are doing the best they can yeah. There's
once you are one year like yellow, that's right. They are human, like I'm a human, but the fact of the matter is that the same time here, show me the choice he he did make. The decision to live downtown with Andre, and I would live alone in the apartment with caregivers yet, and there was an abandonment moment there when he got in the car, and I had stuffed it down so far. It was one of the more healing things that has happened to me in that was a twenty four years sober it's crazy because we create these narrative, so am I narrative. My mom was an angel. My dad was the bad guy he's to blame for everything I hate about myself and that's that wrapped up to your point, yes, and you know my mother, God bless her in suggesting into how amazing she is. You know she told me up and all four years ago. Maybe she goes hey. You can be mad at me like you, you deserved
mad at me. You know there's a lot of step dads around. They weren't. I didn't pick well, there's a lot of shit going on right now, but fight you did a great. It was like I'm giving you permission to be mad at me. I know you loved me, go do it, which is such an amazingly gracious thing for a parent to be able to tell a kid, but I also wondered the other question I have cuz they were busy and that that makes sense is. You may have been great with the fact that dad was gay and with Andre. What about the amongst your group of friends? Were you embarrassed by that? How did they take that everyone was cool with it? One of the gifts was geographic and situational. I wasn't living in Fargo. really nineteen in nineteen sixty right I mean Fargo Fargo. Now I've been too far always just to show you know small town USA is, I mean I wish it was more out and more hip. Even in the late
60s early 70s. I mean it was not unacceptable and because my there had other status as a lot easier, right, yeah and both my parents, Andre, was a famous artist. My dad was very successful in his business and you know what was financed successful, and so there was an end in my group of friends growing up in a private school in New York City in the seventies. Dad was everywhere. In all no one say everyone was my parents. Every everyone was rebounding from the strict, A printing they had and they felt like they just missed the sixties. You know- and so Everyone was experiment was a crazy, crazy time and I never never felt marginalized or other, because I had one set of gay parents. In fact it was, I mean people were kind of jealous cuz. My parents were the super cool parents and it was just replaced.
hang and it was. You know it was an undermining of very removing any again, but I mean that's right or by air right there about a lot of friends over my life's. None of them had a stripper housekeeper yeah exe, the mics ex stripper old habits die hard. The bigger point that you bring up, though, is really really important. The truth of it is when comes to parents, and- and I want to make sure I I get this right- is it somewhat have of new learn Sing for me, love without honesty is hypocrisy. Love without honesty is Tupac I like that right and- and so I really believe in transparency with Children- may do for that. For that reason, because they will pick up on the fact that
not being one hundred percent on us within that was nothing lip side of. That is that honesty without love is abuse and if you're, just you know, hey you're fat. You know I mean so it's it's really fascinating stuff to play around within the I'm. Fifty eight next Wednesday, yes on fourteen July birthday, I am so fifty eight- and we hear this all the time I mean here- you're very public, about sobriety, I'm very public about my sobriety. I'm still a work in progress, but and I make a ton of mistakes I've made. Almost as many mistakes and in sobriety is, as I did when I was out there, but the difference is that your bike I'm actually trying hard the more you go on in life and if you're overrun, if you're pursuing wellness your number of types of problem shrink right now, what those two or three things that are just. Some people use the excuse, but it's just how I am
guy, that way you want to die being an asshole. I don't want to die being an asshole right, so you're going to confront this stuff and work on it, and we can get the minute we cease being teachable we're fucked yeah, but how about the also the frustration of I wonder if you experiences I like to learn the exact same lesson: men any time at what I as it is not unlike working now, it's not like you do that lasts. You're gonna be ripped for life now you're gonna fuckin do the whole thing again day later the next day every single woman that I've ever spent any amount of time with red, any kind of emotional relationship with at some Wayne says to me, turns to me and says the exact same line like the script has been handed like a baton in a race turn to me and say sometimes dating. You is like being in a relationship with myself
and I just sit there and I'm just like in by Curran, you know life. I too, try to make sure as best I can that's something, that I'm working on all the time not just it's not just with significant others. It's with Yorkie work relationships with any relationship. That's what I do my business code. Actually said to me the other day she said your elusive and got so pissed off, like it absolutely like off the charts pissed off and then I realized truly you're not on secret recipe, with my marriage, angry or emotional there's. Some fear, hit the nail on the head of the Mai example. I give, as you could shout at me all night, long you're too, just to show
you're, too short, to get anything done in this world. You're too. Damn short, I would always be amused by zero fears of being short Monica you're, too tall you're, just too tall you're not going to fit into any of the door frames. We go through tonight imitated by you. Well, the real reminded imitated by me, jolly green giant people. People are intimately your smarts, intimidated, they're, intimidated, they're intimidated by your looks, and we we just met tonight The baby is, but the fact of the matter is that it never occurred to me and that they have seen pictures of you right, and I listened to you all the time and it was so funny when you introduce Monica and you you made the height
It's not the first time. I've heard that some time, but yet I never imagined you is not being something like when I'm a didn't you drive down here like what she could be like as being someone's, are like superintended in powerful human. Like that's. How in my head. You were oh wow, you weren't you weren't, like small it just living up, no not so much come in way over your pattern- that the women are telling you is, you think, that's because you spend so much of your life being solitary. You have grown to become accustomed to being by yourself
my survival mechanism, since I was seven eight years old, was elusive. Eighty, I think that, while I'm very lucky- and I lucked in because we are very lucky- in the entertainment, reviewer collecting a check, the entertainment business you're like the luckiest human being on planet earth, you're in the matrix and But it's very interesting that that's where I sort of selected and pushed add certain talents, and I could have chosen other places to do that, but I went to the place where there's the potential for a loose there's more places to hide out there's more time, away and as we know for recovering people will for everyone. We're only is sick as our secrets right live to work extra hard to like not have secrets
It's it's a crazy, crazy thing, but it's really your questions such a good one. It's really because my comfort zone was not letting everyone see all But that's why today in my life, I try to be as transparent as possible. like telling on myself, if I'm transparent as possible over time, then I think there's any defined out right. You know me, as he does, though, do find it hard to be as kind and understanding and none judge mental of yourself, as you are too dudes and meetings cuz. I can't I'll hear someone tell some horrific story: Termite yeah dude, that's cuz, you're, a human being and we're all pieces of shit we're trying our best to not be pieces of ship, but your occasionally going to be a piece of shit. But when I mess up, I'm like you are the world's worst human being yeah.
they should put you in jail and kill you you're, vile and you're. A fraud. Get out of my head and my goal in life is to be is kind as I am the people we meet in the room Zena and its in our wealth cause, because I'm uniquely shitty known to know you you're you're, just a run that the great part around it all just run of the mill average alcoholics with run of the mill average alcoholic mines. But that that mind the great part about the recovery in community is that we are able to find so much. Empathy and kindness and do anything for that new Comer I mean I literally will drop everything and looked everyone just go hey newcomer gotta go right, because I know how important it's a life or death thing. I mean look for ten years
throwing me life preservers and I was throwing them back cuz. I didn't like the color orange Eventually, someone threw me a life preserver and I never let go of it. I mean it's like you can have my seat in the rooms you can have my space in the recovery road. When you private from my cold dead hands. I mean I will kill you for that right. However, much love and tolerance and kindness is I'm able to treat the newcomer and other people, I'm not half as kind to sounding and I'm of some of our staff and so that the deal you know my mice sponsor always told me treat everyone like treat the new Comer in meetings, and that should start with yourself if you're not treating yourself with love and kindness that way that you can't give it away. If you don't have it I'm so like many things in recovery, it's counterintuitive, but yet it since when you're living it. Now, I don't know if you've ever even attempted to
put down or isolated to a single ingredient that I feel like I've observed in your story really takes a turn when you are able to do this has humility. the treatment and you have worked in many many restaurants, but you gotta job, just washing dishes right. You hovers your launching toilets, I get out of primary treatment. I'm forty days clean, it's the middle winter. In Minnesota, I go to hazelnuts halfway house on seven street called fellowship club. I would have. I was desperate, First sobriety, I would have sobered up in a liquor store. I was ready this place. They were giving bed and three meals a day no money? I was in debt for thousand dollars: five hundred thousand dollars the IRS in New York. I had like three court cases against I mean like I was literally
hiding out at a halfway house. No bills were coming there. No one knew I was there except a handful of friends. It was a great space to get sober and I woke up there, the at the first night sleeping and they said. Okay, you have to go to spot job group. We're hours to get a job, and if you don't tell assign you two one So I immediately went to my counselor and said I need to see the director of the house and I walked into John Curtis's office. I sat down and I just like rambled on at him for twenty minutes, I'm supposed the job? I'm a famous colony area from New York City I run of these companies. Have restaurant very accomplished. Shall I give this? I want to take over the whole food service system at the house of foods. Terrible by the way is that you know that cut my standard fee in hell. You know ten thousand we may do it and I was like ok there we go
get some papers drawn up and literally and my counselor came in and they dragged me and twenty minutes later I was on a bus going to hospitals and jails. You know county lockup, washing toilets and bathrooms wow. That was so awful that I forty eight hours. I got a job washing dishes at a coffee shop. bon Snowing Avenue called do bins and I were. dishes and bus tables they are, and then I was getting ready. Leave the house after four or five months, and there was a fancy. French restaurant opening town and I knew the owners from New York and I went in Can I apply for a job as a dishwasher, hoping to avoid wait. Anyone who knew me from new york- and I wash dishes at CAFE ended in spring of ninety two when it open
for about a month. Until my cover was blown through, I mean one of the most craziest stories with my whole life within a matter of weeks, I was the chef in partner. I want from dish sugar chef in partnership, as IRAN show up right. You know one of the line cooks, who is also like the day soon chef called in sick or something like that, and at ten o clock they were in a panic to finds a hundred and fifty seed. Main cafe over the Foshay tower. We did two turns at lunch. You know three hundred in an hour and a half it was at the time the hot restaurant in town and the day guide a sous chef show up and he worked the grill station. I did the dishwasher, they earn and waved my hand. I said to the chef at that I said you know, look if you need someone to do it call in another dishwasher our work that guy station and he was like you're the dishwasher shut up
keep washing dishes, so eventually they had no one to do and I kept saying look. I really think I can. I know I handle that istation and put out the lunch. Damn it's one, thirty and I'm chop chives in my station to get the nighttime doing, mise en place for the nighttime guy and the the restaurant opens the door to his office. could see down the line. He looks at me and he gives me this long finger and I walked in is office and he shut the door and I thought it was going to be fired and What have I said? What have I done? Listen to me, I'm always the bad guy, like I've done something yeah, yeah yeah and he looks at me Can you explain to me why my dishwasher is putting out nicer food than any What's the restaurant, including the guy. Why prior to be the chef here- and I said well, I kind of been cooking for life.
twenty years in New York at a pretty high level and in Europe and he's like like what kind of places- and I gave him my quick cuvee, which was a lot of Michelin, starred places and a lot of lot of pretty fancy pants restaurants with lot of fancy. Pants chef and he asked me to take over then there I he didn't really like, but the guy was currently the chef and I said, Hence I am living and I mean I've silver months ago and the halfway house, and we need she had a little thing. I took it back to my sponsored, my council. They said yes once you get out, you can do it, but you should be honest with him and tat in what you need, and so I told him I need you know my these two ounces, Atropatia Hawtrey fifths of Jack. That's what it was, but you know the incorrect we think was, as I actually practice.
I was so scared shittless to ask for what I needed that it changed. It really did change my life. I offered me money and expected me to ask for and I didn't I just said. I need Monday night off Wednesday night off Saturday. Do you like yours by meetings? Here's why need to do. My sobriety comes first, and I want to do a meeting during the day in the back of the restaurant, and you know within three months taking over the kitchen there's so many treatment centers here in the twin cities, and so many amazing culinarians coming from all over the aid is three choose people up, pretty quick rife really pretty quickly and they started back when I was getting. sober it started. You start to see more and more food people showing up, and so we had the executive chef from this resort in full. order. My friend Tommy K, he would became my Suchet little by little.
Listen. We put together a sober kitchen and for good solid three or four years we were. You know they were two or three or four best, restaurants in town. We were lucky to be one of the weird and amazing amazed crew and we just you know we did things a little differently. I have a very similar story. I worked at Elias Brothers, big boys in Michigan, Arnold, you guys have big boys here in Minnesota used to we had. They were all over the place in Michigan and I was boy and I also washed the dishes and I was making too thirty, five an hour, and they only gave me fifty percent off the food. I can only work four hours cuz, I was in junior high, and so I would eat my exact check every day. It was a push. So what I started doing is the slim. Jims were cut in half in the kitchen when I was clearing the table. If someone didn't touch that half of the Slim Jim, I would go back and eat it, and I was never a couple weeks and everyone does ok
was going to say it progressed to by the time I I did not get elevated to cook. I got fired I was picking up a big boy and just eating right. the teeth marks wow having french fry I'm good, it is and I lived look, I work at the cook. Staff was on work, release from the state prison Michigan and they thought it'd be funny to put the animal grease the fat. You know saying they smeared it all over my moped and I the writing. Greece double spree home in the winter time on snowy roads and dumb Denham here it worked out. It worked out. So I guess what I was asking is: did you you? Would you eat people's food? That's really what I wanted. I think I think every
What does he have to remember how good you also have to remember what my job ended up becoming for the last fifteen years evening? Weird shit, yeah, so good training that the last here before I sobered up. I was living in an abandoned building, casements open with no electricity. free pirated it from the bodega couple buildings over and I was stealing comet cleanser from said Bodega. Every couple of days to spring. The circle around the pile of dirty clothes. I passed out on every knights of the roaches and rats to me in my sleep super classy. So if that's how white and I didn't find anything wrong with that by the way My circumstances That's how I was willing to sleep. You could imagine what my dining life was like. That's true
So I would I mean I would steal food and it is fascinating me would take doggie bags of their leftovers and then UT couple Argolic. Don't bring that in a cab you're not going to eat it. May we go with the garbage can, and so you know I just mad or every mail that I dont finish it s right. I do take this harmony. Might I guess I'm a bad person? If I don't I'm wasteful, and I take it yeah ends up in the trash a week later, but I think that's why the you know day one scene, one moment one of the pilot that would eventually become the thirteen year bizarre foods, franchise opening shot. That's probably Tell me why I was so willingly able to eat the yellow fermented frog anus, whatever it was
because I was like. While this is no big deal, I mean I I I crawled out of a gutter ran now I'm shooting a tv pilot for a lifestyle network yeah. This is any good will you did. The show was thirteen years or fifteen thirteen while fifteen years, a travel channel, because I did a couple specials and it took a while to sell the show and then thirteen years ago, bizarre foods, premiered and thanks to Jay Leno, it became a monstrous hit. I probably made six hundred episodes of episodes of eight different shows, all of which were bizarre food they just name them different thing. Sought after life was like the first three four. Then they decide that stupid our foods. America, then let's do wild wild world of food. Then let's do this chick. You know, cuz there was trying to mix surely say: that's go back to preserve lonely, the problem, if you start with of show
bizarre you ve got to top Ganges. You started off way too. Hot my opinion, You're saying there was calling on railway reverse cow girl, anal, sixty nine party Where are you going season? Two you've done. Every sex act imaginable. I was making the wrong show. I just not becoming morbidly obese greatest urine attic in year, job busied in food and making food, and that sounds like a recipe for disaster people say this to me and maybe it's the tape in my head, but I'm five ten and I two hundred and twenty five pounds out Tudor twenty five A Robin stamp in PIG iron, Rhine with twenty five pounds, none the less. I would like to be about a hundred and eighty five pounds. So I find, while maybe we're bid, is in the case, and I would love to lose.
Wait, but I have- falling in love with all the people on instagram who say it doesn't matter how you look, how do you shape and all the rest of them like they're right here right and it's almost like they've given me ice cream, cart, Blanco, it's hard. It's a turkey that all thing is interesting its into its hard and I think one of the problems for me Always I've always been heavyset hold on a second. Whatever your self image is which I'm sure you suffer from Dysmorphia as we all do which is the most hysterical thing of all time. Thought when they meet you is this guy's heavyset? So that's all there has data that doesn't have. I am, but I am curious being an attic. Yet
regulating internal emotions with external things, all the external things that can regulate those emotions are going to be appealing on some level. I I have found that You transfer your addiction to other things, to do five hundred episodes of television. So what you do is I had a choice become morbidly obese or go, all in on workaholism the Hall ISM guitar shopping, fancy, hotel, Idas, fancy hotel out is by the way when you said twenty, eight, three dollars a room for that sweet at what a bargain I was like. I was like, those fascinated.
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Weather here was a r. I I loved it. I hope to do it again now, what I'm pointing what is that you are a chef than you were a journalist than you were the star of a reality, show in big radio stent, and then you now a restaurant, or is that the right word for always- had my hand in restaurants, one way or the other. The tv thing has been my primary deal. I like to tell stories about culture, true food and I will never stop doing okay, but that I have too many jobs right and now the pots about to call the kettle black but pretend I'm your sponsor for two seconds I want what you have and I'm willing to go to any lengths how to get it. It would appear that you set your sights on something you get that thing it didn't give you the feeling you thought you were going to get so then you set your sights on another thing and then you go get that thing
and then that didn't result in the feeling you thought you were going to have and then you'd see it's never enough, never enough. What is your relationship with that these goals and thinking you're going to feel certain way, or maybe you don't think that I certainly always thought that men found out it. It wasn't a permanent mental state of mind that I was going to achieve and it brings a lot of questions. You've been fortunate enough to accomplish a lot of things that most people don't get to accomplish, but then, on the other side So it didn't really feel that whole right, it never never fills the hole, will something's fill the whole four day, others for a couple of days, yeah the only once I get about. Four hours have been happier, yup gonna buy another pair. Yet the only thing that has never stopped making me happy and feeling that whole is telling adventure learning stories in
media that make the world a better place that I'm proud of, and I can defend when I'm sitting on the couch with someone, because to a lot of people. Bizarre foods was about a fat white guy that goes around the world needs and that's great it's an entertainment show. I knew it was entertainment show, but I needed turned it into a platform for change right and I had a regionally died, sold travel channel a Trojan horse they bought an entertainment, show about a fat white guy that goes around world and eats bugs. I was trying to make a show about preaching patience and tolerance and understanding in the world, because I sense that we were we were defined. Clean ourselves by our differences rather than by are some similarities. my internal recovery. Life was not matching my work world and I said patients pounds understanding. I talk about that. Every night
my recovery like. Why can't I do something that actually contributes to the growth of that and that's that's, how bizarre can I dared to put a hook on it and so window dressing and other stuff, but I want people to identify with that family meal, that family meal in every episode of our show, we never had an hour. pointing added or a lower. Third, that's it. This is the family meal pay attention every piece. A tv I've ever done with a handful of exceptions, has always had a family gathering in meal in it, because I, to show the world what people in one corner of our planet looked like when they ate. People could say. Oh my god, that's how my family looks like, even though I'm all the way in the other the world, even though the maternal,
and father shoving the forest skin and his mouth yeah. You know my guy matter like my drunk or go Harry Christmas grabbing brownie. So that's the only thing. That's ever filled the whole. We discuss two. You know a while back this idea of continuing to learn, be teachable the last couple of years, the big o you know awakening that I've had I say yes and chase too many things you know saying no to some stuff means saying yes to a whole bunch of other things, and you know my sponsor me that when I was you know six months sober, he was talking about other things, but I still had that defective character. Inside me, that was like aching something's going to fill the whole science going to fill the hole and I finally got to the point. This is the year of saying. No,
then it's hearse in that you were aiming at. Did you have an idle that you're someone's path that you're trying to replicate, or you think if I was that person, then I would be like I did it time to relax. No there isn't that person, I I don't know of any one or any thing, because my addiction is more more so it doesn't matter. I don't want to compare myself to other people. I want to pursue my own bliss. What I'm trying to do is identify here's what's gonna make Andrew Andrew and let's lean in let's leanings, of that right rain, and whether there is a famous West Wing episode where Bradley thank you is he he's he's lost faith. He doesn't know. Why he's You know the presents gonna run again and it is understand and he finds himself on a snow, night in the MID west at the bar. In some
little tiny motel with an average Joe You can't contact anyway, he's basically stuck having to talk to this guy that was kind of rude with it. The beginning, at the end of the the episode Bradley Whitford, his character has had this conversation with this. Every man who just says you know of my family and I'm just trying to keep it simple and the more I keep it simple and the less I ask of the universe, the happier I am with everything, and you know it's not that I don't worry, about money. It's just that if you give away what you have and if you have a good attitude about it, you know, then, that financial inside purity. Just doesn't come to pray on you. You know what you're you're you're happy with what you're have any basically throws Adam. All of those same box rules that we really wish. We we lived by. We know what they are, but we wish that we live by them and I think about that all the time you know you Your expectations low, keep your nose to the
in stone. Simplify you still, and I mean that's the goal right and then you know, hopefully by the time, I'm all the way yeah and I will have the least toys and Eve will say I win what's interesting about? It is cuz we're here huge scandinavian population here right and yeah, and they have something they have something in Norway and Sweden, and Finland and Denmark they have this communal. Live that really is working there. The happiest people when they win something they don't he's an empty Peter Krause was telling me you know that's very much. The kind of Saint Paul Minneapolis eat it cuz like you don't show off you try hard you don't! anyone's nose in it. You know, and you to stay in your. Do your thing and I think it's really a
horrible and I think it's not an accident that you were drawn to this place, because this is probably the medicine you needed. One of the reasons why I stay here, people? Always nudge mean they're like well you're in the entertainment business? Wouldn't you be better off on the coast and if I was on the coast, more jobs may come my way. I could do a few more talk shows. Cuz scheduling would be easier. I'd also probably be dead. The I just don't know? You know one of my best, oldest friends, oldest family friends, came and visited me when I was about five months sober- and he looked me said, what's your plan and I said well, I'm gonna be can save money and pride come back to the EU but I promised him I'd stay here until I was one year sober enough. remember. This is April nineteen. Ninety two right and I'm Tellin him I'm going,
I'm home in seven months, and he looked at me and he said why would you go back to New York and he just this is someone that I trusted and loved and I just looked at them. I said what do you mean and he goes well Arthur better now than they were a year ago and I'm like yeah I've got my life back. I feel good. I'm listlessness listless and you know he's a great well. You know why don't you move back to New York when your life stops getting better you know I feel like this is where I was always meant to be well as it's interesting, because I don't miss the Michigan. I like riding motorcycles, and you can only do that for a couple weeks in Michigan a year and but the thing I'm missing it Does Monica die where we're staying at this house on Lake Michigan with my whole family and it's unbelievably beautiful like it was two nights,
I was just glass, I've never seen Lake Michigan, just glassware watching like a thunderstorm come over Chicago and it's moving across the thing and I'm like I really want to live here again in Monaca goes well, but don't you think you would just get tired of it every other place right and I was like yeah what I and I'm really thinking it over and then I realize one of the gifts. It mean it's, it's not a gift, but it is a gift. I don't know you know what every I'm here knows that this is very finite, that it's going to go away in two months and then we be back to hell on earth.
much as I hate the hell on earth it does. It has a magic to it that it makes you appreciate everyday you'd, there's not a day on a lake that year like over it cause. You know our fuckin winners, our aim- and I tell you it's a real by putting our lifestyle and I respond, lies holler, but all these people out there know the same secret that I know there's a look. You give each other when the high- by that day is five below zero. The it's like yeah, we're going to get through it. literally, is like Jon Snow and the Rangers setting out north of the wall, where it's like yeah we're tough. We were black you, ve made a commitment, but it's don't know why. So you know why? Because something happens in you know the end of April. Anime where you go to sleep one night and it's just twigs on trees and you wake up
morning you squint and you're, look at it the trees like out your window at the officer in your house and your like shit. Everything is just greening, that's just tipping just a little bit and the next day it's just a little bit more and then the next day is like seventy two degrees, even though there are still snow in the parking lots at target and everybody walks around Everett ox around. In short that it's like yeah, I'm I'm I'm hit Nay teens night. My favorite is measured again. It is. It hits forty five in April in due time down now guys right, motorcycle bathing suit Z, not merely that warm yet add to it in any. when I share this in common, which is, I have a ton of political opinions, I'm a lefty progressive, but I also think. That my shared humanness is a far greater piece of that pie than my
political opinions and literally account set that was invented a hundred years ago. So I resist the urge to make it my identity in, and I desperately want us to be reminded that were humans, long before we're Americans long before we're left or right and all this stuff. We share that and the thing that you guys have here and we have it a little bit Michigan but not as much here is. There is an awareness that you might need one another. Will they brene Brown made? A great point? Is she she was in Houston, and you know they had the hurricane and the people that came down and rescued people when they put their arm out to lift him into the boat? They didn't ask them who they voted for. It got crystal clear it transcended all that I think they
is just an undercurrent here that she can get real. The power goes out, you get snowed in, you might need each other, and I think that's an incredible thing to be aware of all the time it sucks that you need eight months of winter to do it, but here's here's, here's, the here's, the other You raised a really good point: there is something intrinsically kind that is embedded in the culture of the Midwest, because it was people who moved from the coast at great peril at greater. At great risk. The ancestors, the people who were here. You know unless you're part of the indigenous first peoples of this amazing place, and there are a lot we all came from somewhere a tremendous risk. We wanted to be and we wanted to stay, and I think some of that culturally, comes down into all of us to the fact where we that's where that Minnesota nice thing comes from? I just move
I was in New York before I went to Detroit. I was in New York doing press and I am working on the street when my Buddy Steve De Castro, in this gale young girl, pretty clearly go out on a night on the town. She is wearing a skirt and triple that peace, a toilet paper, those hanging up, Donald Trump Shoe when he got on the plane. She had a piece, a toilet paper. So how far hanging out the back of her skirt- and I was like I was like- is that part of the fit like that. I had a moment. And I was like it was busy and it was the West Village, and I was like I've got to tell her like you want to go, but a good samaritan law. You should go to jail if you see someone shit paper hanging out of the back of their skirt, on their way out on the town and saying so I go excuse me is used ass. You know New York, like a Ok, you're gonna, you're, gonna hate me now, but you're and thank me later instil
while it may bring your skirt and she's, I think you that was the hardest thing. I've done this year is No there's no good deed goes on, I mean she could have been unfamiliar. Ended in out could been hold the power water. You gonna, be like you do that Minnesota would have gotten a hug yet that's all I know no hold on all Can I watch the e true Hollywood story of Jesse Ventura. It's the best three minutes of your life. I recommend you find it and he had to the greatest quotes. I've heard I forget the tiny town he became mayor of before he became the Gub. What Griffith Bark Baronne part time he goes because I got to Brooklyn Park. There was big problem in the park. I decided to clean up the streets, Navy seal style
gave no details of what that men, like amphibious landing at the park. That's what the Navy seals do. They come in zodiacs and start gunning, people down, apparently that's how we dealt with the drug problem there and they asked him like what was it like to win the the goo tutorial race, and he said tell you when I found out, I won my wife and I went to the hotel and drank nine bottles of DOM Perignon. I did my acceptance, in the bag was like not about the people that live here, that they have, that guy God bless you guys. God bless Andrew
applause, Monica awesome gas. You using your superpowers, were good your help and deal with you know a lot of kids. Twenty seven million kids get free lunch during the school year and then summer comes in their left, a male, you're undernourished or no food, there's a lot of words for it, but you're working with YMCA two to two. Tell that problem, so the mule gap is very very eighty percent of the kids who get meals during the school year. Don't get them during the summer. The wire w c ay? has had a summer food programme, since two thousand and eleven last year only seven years doing this. They gave out their hundred million three one hundred million and this is why I love doing working with them, because you know when you're
service worker you're. Writing a ten dollars check to donate to a charity. Want to make sure it's actually going to a place. That's figured out how to solve the problem. The Y, satellite programs. They take their programming into the inner city in apartment complexes. They go out to city parks. They have twenty five locations. They've figured out a way to take care of kids after school before school during school year all summer long from early in the morning, till late at night and all they do is give kids a c. Place to be, and they feed what a radical concept yeah Nn, so God bless them. It is RI legation to ourselves and to our future, I want to live in a society that believes that A single hungry child is a problem. If your we're hungry children. I mean what the What is wrong with you, I mean I just
yet, if you're, Oscar Myron, you make lunchbox than your hope and kids or Hungary, I not to point that out but There is a situation where your brain kids are hungry and speaking of Asker Mire, there is one thing left when open ended thing here was the fourth skin cooked was it cooked? It was cut and wow straight off the bone, straight out: the boner Minnesota Saint Paul Minneapolis, the twin cities. Thank you so much to Andrew. Thank you so much so Monica. Thank you. We love! You have a fantastic night.
and now my favorite part of the show the fact checked, with my soul maiden Monica bad man. Ok, so you're getting your ears pierced me, you're gonna get a couple or you're gonna get for Pierre scenes. I am So I got my ears pierced originally when I is like one dales now one day, but maybe like a month, my parents got them, I didn't know that about Tina DNA. I've been three different experiences on the playground in allay where I've been talking to other dad's latino dad's in. They were looking at Lincoln with long hair and they were like an idiot know her name. Yet. Is that like that's what misled them and they said? Oh, how old? Is he I said: oh it's a she and then they said. Oh, she doesn't have her ears every single latina child on the playground
Really, it's very omnipresent Well, that's interesting our friend. Molly began who is looking she's Ecuador end with dissent, we weren't Marco Polo and more time, but these ear piercings- and I said I got me- a mine- were dominoes a baby and she said me to as the ecuadorian way I think it's the latino case. We can expand, but yes, Indian, Lady Terence, do that too? Well, there's a lot of fun things about India Right or one of them is the gold in the love gold. They really driven up the price of gold, the so my grandmother had these gold, necklaces and staff and rose now necklace of hasn't issue when I love the S my hot grandmother and yeah yeah. I need to visit them attracted to her
you you aren't, I heard so many maybe you're a car I wish you would be about. I would now you she's I didn't movie with Jane Fonda and I was married to Kristen, but she's very flirty in a very professional fun way in, and I am very flirty and I was looking her as like a hundred percent. If I was single, I would roll around with her yeah I mean she is a uniform. He asked, but I ain't HANS. You know you know Elvis Presley at the end of his career. He would do these concerts and he was your several hundred pounds. He was shooting dope. He was a mass, so sweaty would lay on his back on the stage. Sometimes he would sing like a full song lane. good, that's really hard to do by the way singing like yeah, but that you'd see you got to the regions in the women they still loving. You know my theory is like no matter what they see the nineteenth.
fifty Elvis Presley so there's a good chance that I would look at your grandma and I would see women in the wedding photo baby. I'd like to put this to the two case. I'm sure Christian, would let me out of Mark marital contract. Sit lay with your grandma. Ok, you're ramp has gone wrong, No he's still there. That's going to be a big issue, you might be worried for her health are 80s and if I see a young big man who wants to make love to Kristen, I might be worried about her hell. yeah. She going to make it through right, yeah, like a surgery at that age, make it through. You have to throw away that she's older. My grandma had a lot of gold jewelry. yeah and yeah. It was very coveted, like those were the things that you,
and carried away in the U K away like for very special occasion, eurozone money- you have a motor, you have well, she Emmi in there, swiss gold necklace. Will you be expected let to her funeral all the different pieces that are good at all levels in your way. Help and you'll have to go by one that, just like the one you asked he eggs. I listened to that benedictine monk that a brothers were along and I got the book and I listen to. I've listened a half of it. Ok and its good. It's good ease, like you know, a kind of secular I mean he's not. He believes in
Jesus Christ, but he's also like you know, all these divisions are stupid and religions, not about that Susanna Progressive, but final thing like when he's really boring down into what is he goes? You know to imagine gods love. You must know the love you have when you look at your own child to see yourself in this creation is so rewarding, which is a hundred percent. True yeah. It gives me this crazy, good feeling that, and he said that's what God does when he looks at SK as he created as those like. That's a pretty vain God, like I expect me, is human to have that gene myself in something feel so good, but that's so fucking shallow. I expect the creator of the universe and not be fucking tickled by this thing he created he looks at us. I totally bailed out. At that point I was like that's who you're worshipping is a guy who's?
in areas like what he loves about is seen himself in the creation. Is that eco maniacal? for a God. No, I think it's that it there's a pride. Theirs yeah the on his pride. terrible pride is terrible how old is not terrible Ah well, let's be clear! Yes, being proud, is not but having pride it, snow it that it's the same thing tat cell generally, you go. Don't let your pride get in the way you have you, the lack of humility, get out of hand, I think, but generally I think, being proud of others. It's great Do you know this is not to get too in the weeds on it. But do you give you ever noticed that when you get something I've never said, I'm proud of you. What I owe you Save you as I'm happy for you, I'm so happy for you cuz to me saying I'm proud of you is condescending,
It's like who am I to be in a position that I could be proud of you with all your might. I am, I don't know it's triggering for me, though there we are the diamond this, because this is about you. This is not about I've ever along. No, no! No. I loved that people are proud of me, but don't you think, I'm proud of you declare some ownership over. You All I want is for you to be proud of me. It's a little egocentric like I'm a happy for you. I am so happy for you. I'm proud of you makes me feel. Like I don't know, I've watched you grow and that is objective areas trill tee? I I wonder if I have a lot of people feel this where Roma anomalous in this I feel
So opposite rising costs. I've been about the SAM proudly you several times, and then I go. No. She pretty feel like. I do and I always go. I'm so happy for you, I'm fact they only say I'm so happy for a mere well, that's fine! You can see with your plan, but I don't feel like. Even I tell you I'm proud of you. I've told you there, but but you I like it, because I would want you to have some ownership of me ray what as well, mean of its people. You love you. You hope that they do feel an ownership in a connection in a way where that was their accomplishment makes you feel pride. Yeah that's a little weird with you.
do you because you care deeply about that person and you if you are connected yeah. If I see your side for sure, I see what you're saying well, how do we even get em, I, oh god, having looking around creation allowing yeah so elated his accomplice, etches fifth like is very but doing vein in human for a God. Don't you think that you're hoping that at the end of year, if you look at it and be proud of it be mortal feelings of pride. I know it, but that's a good feeling to look at the gods like I did. I created this perfect animal, or maybe it's not perfect, but it still lying very imperfect. So I forget you're talking about earrings. We seem stoned,
We ve been trying to talk about because we're on a real chip with regard to tell people we're sorry on our future. Yeah I'll live on this field reality there. I know it's a meaning it double studs and I'm going to get two earrings on the side of my ear hoops there very cool, I'm foreseeing. Is you don't generally wear your hair behind your ears? normally not notice. Just every now, and then I'll see, eye glass, you'll get a glance they'll. Think oh well, we'll she's edgier than I thought. Yeah, that's a fun reveal. You know tell people what I was urgent. You do not knowing that you're gonna have these new piercings, how shave one site your hair Ivan either that looks so cool on you owe you also wanted me to not do anything if physical at All-
then get the giant appear. Saying said that that's really makes message. Well, I said I said how far what I said, how far you going up without is gonna get a naval piracy in the manner of a giant appears in a minute, a geek. They call it the geese when you pierce your parents. I do think that feels or offer Tibet. It is like a syrian power like the aggregate hot stake knife men now discover, doesn't know what a perineum is. The gap between your ball sack in your anus or vagina in your anus there's so much stuff there like it, feels like the hottest like there's just not. Oh yeah, yeah, yeahs area of the body. Do you think if I got a vagina piercing, my PQ's would be even more That's for sure, where you want random pig used around
or would it be distracting and when you feel like you would need to go into the latrine in like let off some steam a lot I like to feel horny. We talked about this. I like getting them. waves of warring? Oh yeah, I like your fork. What's not too like about it, you're right. Let's go we'll get our general, except, if you always after go to the party and deal with announced, Morrison's sex addiction or jestingly s habit, it is actually on the Porta potty, with a disgusting hair of maybe that was the source of all of it or was taking out their vagina rang, and so they had he put it back again and so that it is the napkins and some hair got out. Will you ok so Andrew Andrew Zimmermann, yeah. We had a we're very hard time with it will also. I had a very high cost
you want to say, Zimmerman I just want to say before you say any facts: he took the three of us out for a meal afterwards that was so fun and tremendous, and it was I'm so glad we got the experience of hanging out with like a chef and going to a place that he knows his ray in a way you they treated him and the way he ordered, for I saw an air Letty it was so fun. I loved it from the second. We walked in the door. The foodie day is Johnny. Priority on your list before we even got to the city right nanny about chef income? While we will see came to that table and she was so nice. She was Superman, obviously talented, yeah, two hundred ten out of the kitchen I heard a while the general which he made a joke about the cologne he bought
was so expensive. Oh yeah, yes, and he said it was six thousand eight hundred euros. His head with translated into I forgot what he said like a million american dollars or something one thousand five hundred and sixty seven american dollars. Now so could have indifferent. It was right more before it highly language, the worse its man. I think in a long time for them great for US That's awesome. You know who am I to say. I have stupid cars that people are probably like how on earth could you spend that amount on a thing that takes you from point a to point b? So I'm not. I don't have a ground just outside of a stupid watch so, but that doesn't raising it, because it is crazy. Me too it is. It is inherently a finite commodity that you're gonna use and it's gonna go away. It's like a purchase that you nosegay disappear, unlike the stress with that every time you're using it to be. Like thousand bucks gone, Why
yeah, but weird way it's totally in keeping with a chef, because chefs believe that you should spend insane amounts of money until then they're going to eat and it'll be almost a lifestyle to go like I'm. I'm about the experience. That's why I make money, so it kind of is in keeping do you like perfume? girls that generally my mom has one? I think it's called Tova? Okay and my mother, wore I loved it and I used to ask her to wear it and then threw her and I talking about a ton. Maybe I was like what was that perfume used to wear and we figured out it was twelve and what we really figured out is. We took a trip to Phoenix Arizona when I was alive ten years old and it was the best vacation ever had? We went to go kart tracks, we went to this place called Chaparral, which was go karts with snowmobile
We I got my father Dave Ward. We went to flaky Jake's for the first time we have talked about what we stayed at Woolley's petite sweets. I mean This is the stuff I remember about that trip, and that was the first time she ever wore that perfume. So I think that smell is, is interwoven with this great family, Casey are you associated with that you just thinking about it? Now I'm getting so happy but in general, now be no Christian and I wear the same smell amber while, but you have such a specific smell. That's horrifying! No, it's a lovely! It's love it! When I hug you, I can smell. hair, and so maybe it was smelling like whatever shampoo you wear something yeah. You have a very specific.
Well that icy with you, that's not the boy. They embroiled the Ambroise libraries think women smell like that, because you are the only two women I really see and smiled and smell the same. Like I think, I just think girl smell you actually for real, because all of us would like anywhere that allow Samoan is the first one that war at here. So but it's funny, because the Amber oil specifically smells a little bit differ. on every one o interest. Yes, so I saw Whatever your smelling army is probably that makes with myself probably ok and your will use that charcoal Yellow clinic. So I love it's my favorite soap, it's very sclerosis and then, when it, what do you mean? I am here as employees? four head and shoulders or selsun blue.
I might need to I don't honestly. I remember I remember when I was like a teenager and I would go into someone's bathroom at their house and I would see a jar of Selsun blue and I think I'll someone in this house has dance, a couple different times in my life I needed to get a bottle of Selsun, blue or the other one. I just sent it. Yourself fool. I just know that I would use it and then I'd pull it out of the shower and hide it in the back of the cover in case friends came over. I wouldn't want them to know that I was wrestling with some dander. Ok, the only other fact which is not a fact is something really interesting happened. Ok, I one point. You called him an adequate wishes, but you u pronounced. attic? No, yes, I was laughing so hard. You you pronounce addict addict
We all know you pronounce Attic Attics Beaumont, oh wow, it's all twisty tourney in your head, You know as much as we laugh about it. I do fear it's getting worse because my father- oh my god, at the end, I, like maybe everything and note for him, and I know that, but at the end in progressed, every third word was wrong. I mean it. Was you or you are out a slalom course of trying to figure out what the fuck he was talking about every celebrities name. He tried to say what did he call heart her ardour he loved watching Gerardo, which was Aldo Rivera, Gerardo and I mean ever,
name here, all ye any tried. It asked me about just got what you know this story about just Galva. Oh, my goodness. Now it happened holy shit. Let me first say I fucking love my debt so much. I would love to see him in squeeze him he's such a sweetheart, but on this day I had to go to the team choice awards or some award show and my father. They had drank like eleven pots of coffee at that point, have gag enough that in the Karlsruhe his breath is very rough and Terry, sharp and rough, and we went into the award show in my father. I should have explained to him. He didn't understand their seat. Fillers at award shows in the event that the one of the S Lebanese goes to the bathroom. They know pan out in the audience and have empty seats, so people russian and they sit there and the professional seat filler sell my dad. I sent my dad Darcy
I had a couple seats like in the second row, so I could really see from the stage and I had to go present and then I was going to join him at that seat. Will, while I'm on stage, I see my father yelling at a younger he is in a fight in in the audience- imminent, and I and I'm trying to like, say the shit on the monitor, but I'm noticing my father's getting very heated and now there's an usher coming over and then the ushers explain something to my dad. My dad's are shaking his head. Is bullshit and in what- and I know I know in that moment- exactly what happened. He thinks that this girl's trying to steal his son, seat right, he's telling her. She can't sit there. This is my son, see it but he's on stage. he's coming back and he's like getting hotter and hotter. Now, there's an usher involved, and I'm watching all this from the stage and I'm like. Oh, my goodness, I really can't take him anywhere and so
decide. I got to get him out of. I just want to get him out there. So I go to the seats and I say to him: you know what let's just get out of here. You are or are you little woman drivers deal you see I might yet dead there. I should have told you they're seafarers Bobo, so we're walking out back staging we're walking across the parking lot to go to the cars and as we're walking across a parking lot Jessica, album walking across. We have subsequently become friends in real life, but at that point we weren't France, all that an app and when she was on an episode of punked with me right, my father watched her show angel or whatever that dark angel she had was any was obsessed with her at her. He thought she was the most beautiful creature alive at high, so she's walking across the parking lot. She stopped to say hi to me. Hey Dax and he right away, puts his hand on her shoulder. He gets into her Yes, he's talking into the microphone at a bank teller, now her ease using or knows as a microphone
Sean Jax talks about you, so much What is this saying? I don't I don't talk about her. I don't ever other than him telling me he loves dark angel and saying yes and episode upon. I never talked about her. and he is speaking into her nose like a tiny microphone and he's going on about how often I speak of Artigos, I should exchange numbers like he was trying to be a good wingman and hook us up. Oh, I was, I was deep, you don't know only your parents of clarity, like I'm sure you hearing the storytelling or whatever everyone knows it's an older guy exact, but because it was my father- and I thought again back to the ego is reflection of me now. Oh, did you tat debris? Did you say I was just complete
we fucking embarrassed and then we got like I just meant mental note cannot bring him to an event like I'd love to snuggle on the couch, very affectionate man very kind and affectionate until you to steal a sun up? Mrs Malone, will have them embarrass me today. I love you and I really think Andrew for such a fund leaves and by the way, Minneapolis what a fun fun audience. What a great city! I love that plays gray. What a place sure jack about my mosquito by its are now I love you all