« Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard


2019-05-16 | 🔗

Armchair Expert Live from Denver at the Buell Theatre. April 19th, 2019.

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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go slash. Dax Oh my god! No, please,
you guys result that'd, be endeavour. Also, Ok, so I've guy I've got bad news in all some news for you baddies. First, I think that's the way usually I blast someone with a t. Shirt can the front row and that's going to get the bad news out of the way. So our guest was flying here from Florida today and all the flights in Florida got canceled. That's the bad news. What what a great opportunity, because our number one most requested gas of all time, is also my soul. Mate
he's all right these beautiful lotta, good, lookin, folks, so yeah, our guest is not here. So I and the guests today guys. This is really a special opportunity because he's the most number one requested guess and we're not giving it to anybody or going to give it to you, and you guys, Monica Mordred somebody in our path. You'll be the birthday the gory details, she's also gonna be drinking onstage
She's never die tonight, she's getting black out about forty five minute marker and we're gonna get all the deeds also. I just want to think that the kind folks at lazy boy- you always what they do is they they may I'm always comfortable and always wanted. Then we don't need this habitat for humanity. I want to thank ways boy to just a second tier plan. Have as one she does get a little lose many one hears got Molly, really Unless you see what the little maximum amounts does. An embryo may arise your mouth. Please join me. I want you blast a couple years ago, gauges bang a couple of those out there will I sat down some rubber,
whose northern hotter than a woman with an air cannon gopher broke, given that the real. How was the show? I don't know, I guess it wasn't what I was expecting. You would think there'd be a guess there wasn't, they shouted teacher can and she got drunk and then I guess we went home. I just want to say Monica Lily, Patman Dax me more and more. In August, twenty fourth, nineteen, eighty seven the year of our Lord, a tiny, beautiful brown baby came into this world immediately to delude Georgia, Norka George Dog, my doing around sir.
That is no. That was embarrassing, no doubt lucky directly in the eyes. Look me directly knows or for the idea of rough very rough. I didn't like that at all, so they will probably have you know they ve gotten bits and pieces here and there about your journey. Bets played yeah. So we are looking for more those lady bets matters. We got a guy in thirteen see over there that looks very ready to party now Mimi after now. A lot of these people will now and some of it they won't, but your parents- and I get this confused, often cause I like to call you generation, but you're really one point: five generation is accurate or we have a hard time designating the actual level of generation. Yes, but
so my parents are born in India, say that to me right, there makes it your first generation just cause. She grew up in Savannah. She's still came here at six riddles in its true, but because she moved when she was six, its can. Train kills dicey for your feels for me to know at my head around the first time I met normal. I was in Georgia and I knew that she was born in India, and so I was expecting maybe some ten and in fact she said how backs nice to meet. You well- and I said oh gotta- pick old southern and that's kind of the first time you realize that she had yet. This was maybe five years. Oh and I had no idea she had a southern accident up until then I was like so and then I really started listening and I was like I can sure, you're happy. She didn't have dabs accent
bubbly. Ok, I thought she didn't have an accident at all, because my dad did have an indian accessing sounds like she's in the movie leverance, but that's neither here nor there she's a wonder, beautiful woman in very intelligent and Peter programmer. We lover what why mom and dad in Georgia my mom's dad is a professor. So he worked in Georgia. He worked at Savannah State College measure biology, professor, so that's what brought them they're, ok and why your dad and up in Georgia for my mom There are specifically for her yeah. He had seen a photograph of her or now now now this is horrible. This is already work already too vulnerable. For me, no, my dad's sister and my mom's father worked together
and then they were introduced. Then they decided they were gonna, get married, not too long after that, what's not too long ago, for weeks. No now like Amr, probably a year, oh year, ok, yeah, ok, again, sort of, I would say half way, arranged everything sort of half was a point: five or rain, the ads point five with any money exchange. No ok! again, I know and perpetuate any stereotypes, I'm just Yes, I don't know how it works. Is why I'm asking there's money arranged in arranged marriages now, even because there's lashing bro he's on, arrange, creates real berengaria, affordable earlier cell and big screen to arise they are making them now we're all benefiting then also by the way. The first time, I've ever said that they were kind of arranged, a really ok
You can have it that out here is the best part euralia. This episode is going to be Seven minutes la areas because I get to decide what stays in always your so so they wait a little while those before they had you yeah there. For a minute yeah yeah yeah. They were hanging now, ok and then they had you and I've seen pictures of you and you're the cutest little curly, hair baby. I wish we had a big thing. We bring it up and wondering what posed a picture of you on Instagram in your little white dress, you look like an absolute idiot curly, hair, big round eyes, that's true, where you always precocious. Excuse me: I dont want. Let me just say: Europe, dogs, and I mean I took my hat- to make. I take that as a you're, a bad motherfucker, and I just
wonder when the mad mother Fucker has started right out of the days now. I don't think so, because I spent a lot of my early life just trying to fit in and you dont early score points if you're a boss at that age like weighing you're. Certainly now that doesn't not in your own Arup, but at home you ve been a boss yeah I've- always yes, oh yes, yes, a little tyrant, oh god, yeah yeah wended. That start right now the gate stay one. I believe we have to ask my mom and dad. I thought that little white dress was pry the fourth option. We made them put you in problematic
before that. I'm sure I complained about what they had offered me and I demanded very specific white dress from a very specific store and, yes, they do that had to be exclusive and at what age does it start occurring you on brown? Everyone says: why is that a quick realisation is that something that hits and first great second grade. Well, that's what have you stood up and screamed right now? What I'm Brown Wayne is like a jerk? I thought it would robot. I I wished to seizing we love ways. I got scale not teasing, It's easy. It's easy thing, everybody! I do love everybody, but I have to be honest about how I felt so what age do you start giving aware
so my best friend was my neighbor. Who was why why? Why titanium? Why? Yes, a honky, a cracker devil, a blue sea was not. She was Julia Indian girl in a jewish girl- oh my goodness, getting I've ever known as a high in the young girl, the jewish girl hider. I don't know- and I know we don't need- we don't need that anyway, so really early on yeah, probably five or something as I started being around other kids. I went day care really early on. Oh boy, something happened with the sound, you're a know, while your wine is setting in no everything's, fine you're in Denver Colorado. It's a mile, high city time to pop. Molly?
They ve never had a! U S, president, or vice president, born the steps of the state Capitol measure at five thousand two hundred eighty feet: it's actually one mile high. What are their weird facts? Learn about the Colorado in Denver today. I remember I went through the air. There was another little disappointed. To be honest. I love this day. I've always come here to go skiing, a what a beautiful outdoors a great place, little disappointing, but the weird facts: if you type in weird facts about Denver, Butkus Nothing you'll be asleep by the fourth fat. Well, there was an interesting thing about the word cheeseburger. Was invented here now we're goin. But let us be clear: we love cheeseburger, wasn't invented here, just calling it a cheeseburger was invented paper with it begs the question where they now perversity. Yeah burger with two you murdered, tease one burger one burger with cheese.
Yeah. I got a mouthful. It is it's too much too much, but I do feel a feather in the camp of all different yeah, also, first, to legalise that wasn't even the weird facts. It should abandon. That's funny. We on the eve of four twenty. I hope a lotta. You go yeah yeah, you guys really set by the rest of us we're happy to meet for a second today that it was going to overlap perfectly with Easter, and I was so excited for stoner. I was like if they have like a double holiday. That was centred around eating fuckin chocolate in finding little colorful going on a hunting playing with loose. He asked Yeah one shows up Bunny year. So close, I don't know the history affords wondering about if they ve over over overlapped I'll have to look but anyways, that's fortuitous times that we're here,
continue is this: what we did this is what we do to guess. We would only distract them and they have to give him credit now Otis everyone's. Why? Oh yeah? That's right! That's! Yes! Everybody might already care forty obvious yeah a lot of women. Some are too many white people. I wouldn't say that some people might say that yeah, but you early on picked up the path of assimilation. The idea It wasn't like a really ever made a choice. It wasn't like I, there was a group. Of people who are alien yeah. I would like do we want to be friends with these people or do I wanna be right there
if it wasn't even an option? So really I was just trying to make as many friends as possible, like everyone is doing yes, but I knew that that required me sort of setting aside a big part of myself. Well, I thought that I don't know that that was necessarily true that I need to do that, but I did do that. One thing: that's, what's the really fun part about your story, my story, almost every one story is you have these truths you'd you tell yourself when you are young and then everywhere you look. You confirm clues firm, this narrative you're telling yourself and then it's not to your like much older. Yes, we're like, oh, maybe maiming. Imagine someone, I may add, as someone who wasted time are yeah like I live my life for many years as if I was preparing to get attack, motorcycle gang at all times now I am, I know this about, although that happened on occasion it wasn't. Somebody may need to think about an hourly. It probably happened on occasion because EU or Sea
think about it, we'll away. Yes, a hundred percent yeah. It was not happening to you. Yes, so you did. You did great with the girls you had me we're very go too far, but your popular. I was well like tat their ago as less humble way to say popular well, well, because I wasn't but the most popular grown school by any means, but I'll but mom most everyone like yeah you're, very, like a ball, and I was in a lot of groups. I was in The cheerleader I was in theater, I was in liquid. I guess all what we work. What we would have been called was a scholar athlete. Ok, ok, scholar outweighs tolerably it all right now when it came. The boys, though, does Monica loves boys. She loves wanderings as boys voice. She loves me yeah. What about God?
look for you boys. I always it's hard to drink it with this big stick right here. In my way, lover observed it so difficult to align their here's a crane, the idea. What about your other hand? Ok, look at last year's it insane idea, use society or body that doesn't have a microphone front. So here's Oriana gets a kind of a tragic part the story and Disney story. This is where the parents would go sailing trip out and they would not return. Yeah Parents reminded us of their great hold on. I might oversold that ok yeah, so you the boy. Alas, there was a boy you had a crush on yeah sixth grade and what was his name?
might live there. Ok, let's give em a pseudonym Fabio fur. Ok! Can I save me Chris Pine, his name and I dont think anything came of your get nowhere else. Why in new were pretty sure he'd like do right? Yes, so yes, so Chris Pine was very good friends with two of my a good friends, and so there was a lot of mutual hanging out in these other friends going out going steady, we were at the pool. One day is kind of already structured as a double day in the sands workers of one's a couple on you guys,
circling each other, like any game, Cox yeah any. He and I friend Paul Chris Pine aside and said he. Why don't you ask Monica to be your girlfriend and he was like well, I would but her and work at dairy queen, which I don't love, does make sense to me. When I heard it was a Michigan, teenagers ran dairy queen right, I'm talking eleven year olds. I was just back home with my daughter in a fucking preview s. Fifth, running married. We. So when you heard that you thought I was saying like her parents are children, Robarts Watts, their immature races, make you count the money and the other running the establishment. Now now, but in in Georgia, there was the stereotype that only Indian Zone
Mary Queen. Well, we had one dairy queen and in an indian family, ran it more reserved to assume that all the other Derek winds were on that can't blame anyone. You see one Derek worrying run by India and I like calling as their run and all the daring. Yes, that is six logic like I saw a guy in a wheelchair, forty four you're, a logic maybe saw Guyana cadmium. Do it. Why do it? there's a guy in a wheelchair that was under Mcdonald's, and I said the only people by terrible bail out. Go ahead back pedal tobacco that older, I bet ipads, would have been a fine job. We can laugh at someone with an Ipad. We can't let someone in a wheelchair, because Ipad gonna pick your reality. You gotta pick your disability. Yes, someone with Rhodesia.
Was running our bees. Yeah I've got all they only franchise people with with red man dermatitis. I say that because I have psoriasis in any way. Yes So he was saying that he couldn't asked me to be his girlfriend, because my parents were indian. Fact is job was a civil engineer, Mama's a computer program or yes, they did not work. Dairy conditional with his mother vagrant a baby somewhat to parents do in some better. The map I mean just tell you right now: there's no way! Yeah shit! The bed It could be Scrooge MC ducking it right now through a pool gold coins, but now well he went with their white girl whose parents ran the grocery store. Ok! Well, let's not be too harsh. Oh my gosh read you
a note. I wrote to him right. It was so by the way is this blue my mind? It was so forward. Well, I didn't I didn't. I didn't send. Oh you didn't know Why did the way yeah you weren't, like wasn't like eighteen hundred you wrote to two fuckin guys. Just for one second, keep light, that's how you may I now needs a copy that bad member. I write the same thing twice now and again there was a wedding certificate, a burden another important enough now we'll one copy home. It doesn't burn yeah. That's why Here's where such a big deal Chicago the greater the great wall, it was grey, do two minutes you saw, it was great. I don't know that's how they saw they. Weren't is It made me to do that. We are building resolution of some man right, so there's no
you wrote a yeah. I wrote him a note that I didn't send, but it did have a line in it. That said, didn t want to touch your boy. I want to touch your butt and I did I did want to your phone. Five per I wasn't. I've got no ground to speak for six great girls, but I dont know me of them were rightly notes about get their hands on someone glutinous Maximus. It was specifically for they pop and where they bang and where's it did he of junk in the trunk, or was it just flat white guys? But but if anything were to look right, I think you are baggy pan so heavily in Libya is more just. You want area watched him. Yeah yeah, it was a mystery. Still is so you wrote it. That said, I want to touch your, but in an really really. You are you loved him and there was idea now user, I mean serious
became a rail in life. It really. I do was a sort of watershed moment because Monica you hear us argue a lot, but what you dont here is our most common argument. Is me telling her that guy, like you, did you not noticed that guy like to monitor? No, we don't in guy, he drove three hundred miles hit us sign the biggest fuckin tent. That said, I love you Monica. I love you as much as Jackson, saying he has an anthropology degree. Creative was so good luck because it was kind of an alpha challenge to me, and I was like you: ve earned sharp young book, give it a shot stag by the way the guy was a bona fide nine point. Seventy was in the air force. Twenty
four built like a brick shit house loud so white milk yeah, just what your ordered in the whole rhinos. He was just trying to be funny, I'm I know one goes fuckin through hundred mile mass Joe, that's never happen. I got some funny to say in a drive all night long to say it. You go. You drive that distance for love. Now, ok, now nobody, I still feel no. He also became aware of this matter. Probably here tonight. Oh is he was committing to his bed, and I appreciate man, but
most of our arguments have been about the fact that she thinks no boys liked her. My theory is a tunnel boys liked her, but the first situation was so our breaking that something kind of click that you are not willing to bid. You gonna play a game. You did this, there's a lot of fun cat and mouse game that goes on. When you look at someone and they look at you too long Now- and I was awkward either the case in me like me, and you throw it back, you gotta throw it back from look at Monica Patman and cheese. I'm strategy is called hard to get, but ok well That's not what I was doing. I there were more multiple incidents. What was another one I mean there.
Just boys. I liked that that information would get passed through the great buying. You remember the same firm Basque on your behalf. Did you probably I very loyal to my friend? She did not do a great job and she did a great job. Ok, what's this role, Blanca wanting us Monaco that girl? I can't I like her, but her parents work a dairy queen. So are you fucking terminals? Her dad is a fucking engineer, mom's a computer program or Europeans, the shit you be lucky, you be so you ain't you, let's be buried
when eleven year old girl probably didn't have the capacity to do that. Now she was old enough to have a boyfriend swimming pool. She could have had your back. They were doing stuff so you're. My love in Europe are going to be doing. Fuckin swim dates already are you're right. My girls are the aggressors, those yeah we now know about air other man's horny. Is it's funny? That's true now certain point, because the issue you showed your colours and six great yeah you're horny purview want to touch some bonds. Yes, you had an unbridled fire inside of you, an inferno of passion and lust. Now, ok on satiated wow,
and then you hurt Madame these two unsuspecting guys from Boston idea. You did well. When did it start is so sad when we, where they live, out like this smell, oh no, no, it is yeah in eighth grade ice. I watched goodwill hunting and fell madly in love with those two in both at the same time, yeah I will not choose. I onetime suggested what, if you are on a boat both of them and you just stayed in the state room yeah and they came out as they please yeah you almost lost consciousness at the thought of it will be a good they occasionally like at night there, you fall in love with those guy. Yes, I put my love in a safe place
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go seeding, storage as hit a button in the seats just disappear into the floor, you can throw for by she'd apply, would back there like magic, it's absolutely a magic trick and you love magic and actual ideal of the Pacifica. That's right! Ten inch hd touch screen got building games. The girls were playing some kind of weird game back there anymore. They were talking about the boy, were they entertain? Twenty speaker, Harmon and gardens around system. It is such a luxurious experience to real feather my cap to be
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Bad illness. That's not a job! Ok, most specifically like kind of a flu likes, you re all right. We I wish we had figured out a way. It all away. There is really no way to solve, says no way. Yeah. It's really strange, and it did happen really much earlier than that, like I would have fantasies about in my preschool. Oh really, pre school day cares. I would have been like six in you Fran size that they get sick and that you would help them re ass. I got it so it's so wonderful and real in honors, in beautiful in bizarre yeah.
You can write some might bear no I've seen a couple thousand movies in my lap. Never was there a lead character who fantasize about helping a boy through diarrhea, it's so loving and tender in general yeah, it's a nurturing fantasy, but terrorism, which turns out money that gets that gets, brought in yeah yeah, so I have of course made her walk through this and meticulous detail of made. In generally, it starts with nurturing like Brandon rubbing his back. I assume- and maybe you touch his hair, sell me like what we understand their rights. When you say that you and you are helping someone who is sick child. We just a child. I loved yes, sex object, so you're
It's ok, everyone throws gets is making me feel really uncovered attacking and then at a certain point in really quick, because I know this is another part of it, but they are intertwined is crying. That's it big y yeah, that's a bigger and their normally, not crying while their sick. I don't think I have two months. That's allowing on Angola the one or the other. I did really love when I would see boys cry, yeah, ok, really it's just! The three line is vulnerability. I really was attracted to vulnerability in wanting to be there for someone when they were vulnerable, and I guess I did not have an outlet for that, and so it was getting like really displaced
at misplaced. But at a certain point- and I ask again- I do some a stickler for the details of what is theirs. I was gonna last week. This happens to everyone, don't be a virus and then there's eventually your hugging right you're like come for our yeah Erlich, skin, the skin YAP and and- and this is a detail, the reality that I don't know that you ever even thought about consciously was. I was like. Does that led the kissing and yeah? I know alone. Ok, ok, this ban, as he's never come through by the way. So it was thirty one go eat them. I see food industry, no one is in I saw tat goes down the block. They looked requires yes in the fantasy
yeah. What are report was Durio pills in your dates. Drinks, good idea really get idea, but in the fantasy you would kiss yeah in I didn't think I'd really think about rights. I didn't you just slip up in the motion. Of course yeah it's a fantasy. You like bringing in the realistic elements into your fantasies that are like, probably gross or negative. Through a fault, you are yeah what what you only Obi pleasure myself- and I like working on some scenario- I think- is please double. I too has to be plausible. I have never understood guys who macerated too, like a pin up poster you're, not gonna meet Heather Wilbur. Whatever name was carefully you Kelly, will largely or other lock. Leir calibre come on Sudan, summers share enemy. These people,
and so there is nearly eight years we would even thinking about further have to be like ok, wanna, I'm on a trip to Hollywood. I do a studio tour, they show me the fall guy sat, Heather, Lock, Lear walks out needs a light. I have one like it, so our other. What am I going to land Heather? Luckily I had those abandoned man you do I had like. I was campaigning and- and you know cycle when I hear something in the next hand, what is that open it in its man at the fire that happens to camp? Where I can this dead dead real? When she would go campaign with her girlfriend ass, he was convinced he was gonna bump and abandoned male camping. I always thought there was an chance I would bump into them like always at them. They could be
in my city at them up and by the way it has been. It is no longer here tonight we were at a restaurant that could have happened. Well, I'm one. If you're somebody's been in man, I don't think I am as you are well, yes, you are you're a lot of people's better and it could happen- and it did happen to me much later when I was sort of done. Having this when I moved to allay, I was in my apartment, and I heard a rustling outside open. My window in Sean PEN was standing outside my apartment. You expected from shore panties hung out with honour as Thomson on weekends. Yes, that dude up in your front yard. Well in real life in real life. You look outside and John Academy Award winner Sean current couple things. He was in your yard. Delivering pizza now
daughter, come to find out from defined out, had moved in to my apartment, complex, which is just for apartments of for poor. If supper, blacks, yeah and his daughter had moved in with her friend and was living there for a little while and another exciting instalment of that story was maybe like the next day after I saw Sean pen I was when I went to leave that went to my car in my car was blocked and I was Super Pisca hadn't improv show this is getting in the way of my career and I ran upstairs to the neighbors and knocked on during those like the did. You guys block me in there like? No that's Zack Africans, car and I was like whites
not going to the improv show I couldn't care less. I am only going to dive into Zack Efron being at my apartment. Yes, it just ride. Out and he was dating my neighbour and he was their daughters, no per her. Parliament may said: he's got a timber shown pen uncle William, regarding enough about shod paragraph get a little nervous hearing way. What was your very reported dead man walking champagne movie I thought you were saying goodwill hunting wrong on purpose. I would never do that to you. I know that when you know that all me anyway, so the point is, you can run the people in life, so keep that hope alive if that's true, that's a good point. One other thing about that apartment he had apartment is magic, because when I started working for Christian and Dax I was in Christians. I was in her drawers and myself
stack of all drivers licence, the one on top was from and eleven years ago and Kristen lived in my apartment. Why? The ten years before I lived there or knew her or any of it is crazy. Serendipitous! Yes, ok back to been back tibetan man. Yes, I have a bit of a theory about the fantasy of tending to someone. Ok of help. K tell me because I'm in trouble Robinson his here, he may remembered you remember I the stepsister for two years, Heather, oh boy, what a love triangle! This was guys. My mom met this. Do they got married? We moved into their house. Heather was two years older than me. My brother was three years old and then hurried. She was head over heels, but my brother, I was head over heels in love with her and I think the older brother was in
me. It was a real It was a murky household, do Pierre, but I used to have this fantasy all the time that I was going to be on the playground spring Mills Elam entering someone was gonna, be bullying Heather and I was gonna punch this guy out and Heather was gonna, be like. Oh, my god, you are attractive in the silly as part of the whole thing as he was my friend place. Maids would walk up at that time. To do so, everyone I loved, would be there that was upon Surmount Heather would like me. Clay would walk up like we're going all pose for a pitcher now, but it's really telling because it was the only thing I could possibly imagine of a value. I could add,
Yeah I had just figured out. This would be the one scenario I could make her like me in. So I just wonder if you think that you would be so indispensable to somebody that needed help, oh yeah, that that would make them like you yeah. What's really sad about that is that neither of us thought weak. They would just like us. We would have to do something preposterous,
like punch out a bully or mob up some bomb. Yeah I'd have to be before anyone would really just like to notice yeah. I don't like well knew the most likeable person, so you become obsessed with friends. I asked this question too Monica in total sincerity. Today, at lunch you were forced at gunpoint to give up either your college experience or your experience watching friends, it's hard question to answer and I picked I picked out, give up my college experience because friends had such a deep impact on me as a person that I think I would be losing a lotta myself. If I gave that up I'm so sorry were you thoroughly
of an hour? Were you modeling yourself after a specific friend? No again, like Ben and mad. I would never choose a friend never suggests all you want to be all three of the Ladys. Equally, I didn't want. Is that one of them dont know you mean Phoebe, here's one would one play. The number was, who is? Does she was just had? Is that better? Well, she was just gonna domains leave her alone. She was smiling roaring, doesn't leave an enlarging, and I liked that next time I forget my keys somewhere unwilling. Of course you know why she was oh, you mean Joe. We, he was also a dummy us, but there was a boy. He was the only one that played conventionally stupid. I've seen maybe three episode friend exactly so. I think I know better that we be in every episode, was confused
see there my crazy or was he not always your views, this stupid? She was just like kind of honour level. Show my good really Hulu be she was like Lupi. Ok, she was a genius like a savant Lydia Lydia GonNA, like Masood salary, so he's a figure it out something man jobs. Yet so that's where Megan that kind of money- the traditional swedish! Ok, don't talk about my friend that, moreover, Bob Craft, massage topical so bad for that guy, by the way yeah how's, the guy's, a thousand there's all they got a target he's going down. Let them man have of what forty seconds, a pleasure that also tells you lot. You tell yourself if I had seven fuck insuperable
rings. I feel all right now exactly not until I had to go to a Strip Robins, that's the main take away women, we I now now you get those super bowl rings on a Sunday my way, Thursday I turn in now I am eventually gonna get caught. Am I gonna get high profile? Then I am they hate. They're from another country, even though I am it's also a good testament to the fact that everything is temporary like when he is winning those superbowl he's probably like. I will never do that, and I will never do that. I am I Betty so happy superstitious like you and I I bet he didn't get a hand job for like three weeks leading up to the super. I believe that more I know if I get a hand job we're gonna lose the Superbowl, because my again I do these, we have the most impostors Superstition
we bargain, along with the universe, that's right, yeah, but what if he did get? What have you got a hand job before? Super Boardman. Now, that's why you is like of this war. Now I gotta get these now. I gotta keep doing at yeah have even No one has ok soldiers. Now, let's unpack by craft of two more seconds, you got an all time. You gotta hand job, please. So a millionaire. A billionaire lawyers, as he is itself billion, are allowed. That's not like is dead and a bunch of proper in queens. It's not like. He took his dad's billion and turned it into eight hundred million, but that's inside now, to get poetical, I'm not sure that the billionaire and the hand job like that's all mutually. There were probably guys make a minimum wage in the next bad over yeah yeah. It's a very
democratize here. Maybe any amount of money and still want a hand, probably but back to the ethics of the issue, is for the women, the women doing this. Ok right, so I didn't think about that early argue about. I chose to giving and jobs they're, not empowered women, making the decision about right now. It's not all most certainly urge your right and many chaos what's alone math and have no one sat now in their career, counselor and so want to stroke dog White Lotus, massage parlor God. Yes, in theory, do you think someone should have the right to choose the fact for money
Yes like, if I want to do that- and I have all of you know, I feel a pie feel empowered sure, ok, we'll mostly having now also, we know, she's drove Bob Craft, so you're like couldn't Worley, to do that? So I get a grant tackling idiom, jerk off Tom Brady he's not making decisions and largely has she feels like she has. If I want to do that or I wanna smell or not smell, Comfor Bob grabbed value is throwing. Oh! No, I wouldn't know now I M saying is Bob Craft. Let's say you would say, he's a four four ships and giggles he was throwing up and Irene. Would he be a five or is not great? get hotter because that's happening another.
There are now we got a couple walk out. So sorry, if our original guess was here, we would never would have been known about this. You would have like learn cell prove, meanwhile, that better, but now you're gonna leave yourself yeah yeah. Many of you will be masturbating thought of some of the flu tonight, DR maybe I don't know just see years. All I want to say: ok, I think we should police ourselves. Will we get too excited at someone's failed publicly? I agree with that because we're, pew measure or art thou. We all buck up. We do very one peeped into our lives. The arable yeah, if everyone had a magnifying glass there always be sums will that's all I'm saying I see the human guy who's fuck is life's over nine. For that terrible he and you have a guarantee, was one where's. He ever had well, there was no love that makes the hand job
that's a lie and go around right. Ok, now, to get back to the friends, ok see you love friends, you give up your college experience, yeah and just really quick, walk through the last episode of friend, my PTSD thinking about that is like months of prepare, mentally preparing, so I had to every episode of friends recorded on the age s tapes, because this was before dvds and I had it color coded system foresees in and it was. I have thirty two tapes filling a real pride and joy for me. So I I was really upset and immediately the stakes. The next day was the tests to pass p? U S? History was my ap. Exam was the next day, so all
my friends are doing the right thing and had there and study groups and their by you know doing practice test all night and like Binder- is in the book bag. Not looking at it dont care preparing for this friends. Did you make special devil raising. Now I just stayed in my room, I close the doors by myself. I also do think I had a couple friends who, like got together to watch it and I it was invited- and I was like no- I need to be by myself some things you gonna do on your that's right. So I watched it and who was so motion all cried a barn, oh yeah, yeah. My favorite part, is that you didn't just watch the final episode. They were then on an opera special. They did no per special after the Leno special. I think it was one of em they went on. Everyone knows so she stayed up to one in the barn I consuming all this friends,
recording it consuming it, rewinding ree, watching I'm up all and then a real crying like I'm, I'm in like an emotional state until like gallic three american parents never check no, never known. Now they never do Megan Blizzards working late at the dairy they had a. Night share but yeah. No, they could be They have no idea what I was doing up. They will still doubt now, so he s so then I eventually the bad and the next thing I know my dad is like pound on my door. Rob this year, my friend Robbie, who came to pick me up for the AP examined. I was asleep, and so I had to use data jump out of bed and grow out the door in my basically pajamas arriving at the AP examined was a big deal. I'm sure a lot of you have taken a p exams. Yes, three.
We are preparing yeah, I know. Well, we are an educational, armchairs yeah. Why do we rates? Bud Denver being the most education sector. Most most educated city in Amerika guys give yourself a round of applause, but I'm gonna have to fact check that because only three of your cheering for AP exam, so I don't know where does afraid they won't get laid tonight? Oh no, it succeeded beast, I agree, but I think they have to hide the need to show it, but you gotta three out of five. Just try your lowest score even well. Ok, ok, three is passing and that's feels really which are aiming for, and I did do that. So I feel like
did everything I wanted. I got my friends night in and I pass the test, but I I looked raising walk in there. You do you. I did so with a great and school you gotta scholarship, to go to college for Free University of Georgian. Athens will be fifty two, yes hope: scholarship alot of people gotta, that's just the Georgia thing now it's a Georgia thing as it should be in everywhere thing now, so you go to school and you major in theatre, but you double major cause. You're. First port. One point: five Jenner monoplane via sell your kind to be bold and then you're gonna, be say exactly what was the backup degree pr public relations public relations? Would you thought maybe you could dovetail into the entertainment
anyway? Probably yeah. Monica did really cute things, I'm just going to give the readers digest. She went she studied abroad. She went to can film Festival, she stood outside of a premiere over nine ten hours, but we had to stand outside with signs begging for tickets, for the room, your garden yeah got into a few of the noted use. You saw someone famous in England doing those rights. I also say about London yeah. We saw them like starting to set up like the little of rafters. What are they fan as barriers, whatever red ropes, white scaffold? After all, we are exceeding, they were said, what's going on here and there they go. It's the premier movie neural, like oh great, won't wait here all day. We didn't know what it was before any movie would have done me. Am I
in California, and so we just took turns like standing there for hours and it was the break pursuing hadn't girl jam and we were at the very front and it was the drinking a photograph with her use. You talk to her he signed. Is she signed an autograph she's, a picture of what a store? So you graduate from University of Georgia? Did you do well to do? Were you like? Honours come louder? Any the Duma fuck you. I got one b in college and it was an eighty nine point. Seven. She would not round up woof racist, correct,
no other way to explain it said I would but your parents work at dairy queen out of college and that year cuz I to graduate high school. I decided I was not going to go to college. I was going. I read on the road by Kerouac. My car for several months. It was in this fund is on the road. And never is they went back to Detroit and I lived there for a year The law is a good time and and the third point I woke up and downtown trials like Can I get out of here like yesterday, I gotta I gonna die. If I don't try to do this thing. Indeed, you have that moment, well. I have a lot of those like the original plan was to go to you see I lay it was like I'm going. Rail of more and better than George nope. They say I do not have been happier with my decision that, with a gun magnitude louder, you see, I would have done
four point today they say what everyone interesting you have you converge? What those three I heard you ok, Are you going to use the alien do what I wanna see this programme and acting or some I wanted to do. I wanted to be an allay service like I guess I should go to school there. That makes the most and so I ll go to use yet they also had no idea like that's not even that's not like the best acting programme in L, a whole bones. Pretty you didn't do it. I know no balance attack whether we have school suck. I love you, but I wonder what I want to go the ruins play at the rosebud where they play, and I want my girlfriend brie and we had fuckin beer. Upper sooner like in our underwear. I had a pint of Jack Daniels Sock.
Margo all this booze in inward student section. We just start breaking out all this booze nor Edward Pounds. Everyone's looking at us we're we're white trash. May we were provide white trash, but nobody was doing remiss again where you go. If you make it into the game, you're prosecuting it beat up by ten. Do that down on the way and oh yeah, in this day and yes, people were working on their fucking homework in the stance of the brewing games like this is bust. That's a big bang. I asked I got hammered in there. They were plain Fresno and I you know occasionally you'll, be it a sporting event, and this happens where it's like you. People are yelling nonstop, so no one can really here, but sometimes it is a law share and I got lucky like the stars. Bless me. Ok and I've been screaming. Fresno for the whole game tank, but some there was this this wall right as a scream. I tell ya gotta how but gerardi from private now- and it was the
or ass well actually heard a couple hundred people while rewarding. Why? Now all the people that had to suffer through me, trying to find a state before I die ass, usual comedy June for more lives. Show after this exciting commercial breaks, we all support by fab, fit for the two thousand nineteen fair bit on summer boxes now on pre sale, love that fit fine in the new box? Has this really cool travel, Herr drier, which is so good because the ones at the hotels, their good, sorry, hotels, Ariosto so today, to bring around it also has
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In order the cash card to start saving today and of course, when you download the catch up and enter the Referral code ARM chair, one word: you'll receive five dollars in the cash apples and five dollars: Bokassa, Colombia, Gorge and Non profit organization. My sweet mother works for that helps volunteers working with, and foster care. It's true when, when please download the cash app today ready clean but you you didn't go to use the allay. You ended up movie and with a friend right. So then, so I just how these big plans for along time to to be out in a way and then either the data got postponing postponing postponed and then I'm sure your parents, although not telling you not to go they programme, stoked you're gonna go. They were not happy about the ongoing yeah
and having nothing to do, because I think when I say that a lot of people think that's like an indian parent thing like. I don't really think it's that I think it's just that they are worried about their kid who's going to go on. I conjure you yeah, because my parents did not want anything stereotypical. They won't like you, gotta, be a doctor. You gotta do this, they were just like. Can you please make enough money to not return here like it? That was all they wanted converse. My mother was like yours We know now walked in downtown Detroit with four guys in it condemned build a share, how much worse, get in California, that's true light or whether it will be better yeah, she so small. Really so pragmatic. So how did you over come the herd
So then, yes, so then I lived at home for a year, and I said I am only going to do this for a year and I'm gonna work in Atlanta that sort of how I justified it. As a committee, an agent here cause there's like work in Atlanta there's acting worker. So I did that and then my friend Anthony was graduating. He was a year younger than me, so he was graduating. He also was coming out here to work in production, so we came out together and then that it was because I had a buddy. I think that's. Why was easy, and I know when you get obsessed with the idea of being a comedian or doing you did you just go to a show? now go. I wanna be a part of that. No, I never went to show you didn't know I well. I did a ton of comedy in high school. I am college the inner and I loved, and I knew that was the thing I wanted to run about, as you were once again. I can't believe I blew pass the fact that you're, a state champ cheerily
Oh wow, that was I just wanna. Go now move people know that they know of your extreme accomplishments in year. Elite elite muscle, mass, the air- yes, so how'd you find you should be I knew I was wrong, so you know I was written that I could tell you were thinking about yeah well check in with yours. I was a year period. Three, that's great! maybe just maybe four x. Ok, so you see B. I really just another embarrassing thing about me. Like I just research a lot, like a person, all you to every thing about them, I will fight like record there, sighed the actor studio and watch a couple times. Probably in. I just really want to know everything about something I like we ve done. I think thirteen lie
shows or somewhere in that ball park in aid of the flights Monica his watched oceans, eleven, that's the truth. I like what I was in fact on the flight here this morning she was like oceans, AIDS. They then have inhabited, but only one two, eight So really, I think I saw something with Amy Polar and I saw started I'm ready, willing and as an interesting, and then I saw something with ASEAN summit. He did you see the psycho. These people that I really like did this thing. I should probably do that thing, so I hadn't, even I did not see a show when I signed up for you c B, o you just one in that it could have been anything had been fired juggler now I knew it was his brow. I knew was because like if I'm gonna do comedy and all these comedians our respective done this thing, I'm gonna do that and I did it. You started
you offers of farmers. We have mutual friends enhancing. Who was on the show you guys heard. Rather, nice he's the best, I hope you I was isn't that right is shining. Why I pray every one of you gets to see him do a back slip in real life, and you are in that friendship group. So we kind of peripheral. I can say that proper if real Ellie peripherally knew each other, and then you are on an episode of how supplies, which was a show christian Amazon. Yet Tito Denver Native, oh yeah, I called in a panic when our guest in sharp and like you in Denver, and so you do an episode of how lies in while you and Christian or shoot me shit, crap service, hey, I also baby, said yeah between acting jobs. Now and then he started babysitting origin.
Ok job out did a very good job that you guys asked me to do a lot early on like night nurse were wet nurse At this point I had already been baby sitting a little bit but still sporadic baby sitting right and you had your second delta and she, like the rear for weeks old Christen was like. Ok do you think it becomes more coming like midnight, and a one year end and in getting her current raise our kid. What are you in the next seven months? Where? No, I do not remember united, I can say with one in the house. I don't remember I didn't sleep. I drove over at eleven forty five and I let myself in and I was a weird story, Hicks Delta up,
judging myself right now, I dont view clearly weren't there was so yeah. You should judge yourself. No, abandoning Bob Graph, we're out one boy. No so yeah they picked her up out of her little ass in there and I said to her and I burp ter and I put her back down and I was so terrifying. I was so scared. I didn't really durable. I they are turns out there and then became so mates after that men delta, their sole Maria, our sole maids. I think it probably have to do it then scary, nightmares situation, yeah yeah, defend my wife. Soon she had a wake up really early and yeah, or she wasn't yeah my mind. She I've had a night shooters like there was a reason, no tears. She is nightmares.
The longer that we were all together in Monica was many more more time at the house. Monica nice friendship was forged by arguing about cereal and whether Adnan was guilty or not yeah. In fact, when I realized we resolve maids was we had a two hour long debate about that? Yes- and I was like that you're a fun person arguing yeah, but you still, but I was really wrong- will you're wrong while no you'll never understand what it's like to be around a teenage boy. You're, you expecting logic to be in the soup and there's no logic him like an I'd. I was now what employs do stuff rose like what just happened? This guy thought it was funny the poop and an intersection. Their monsters don't be around them. I was one of them. Ok, that's fine! We do agree on is that he'd there was not enough evidence to convey.
That was my whole theory on would be ok, that was my own theory. We argued for oh, my God, Solana was so far and we could do it again because then we will tonight. Prisoners are released, lighten Mamma has really crazy, smart and crazy, talented and you need someone to write for you and Monica started going with Kristen. If she shot a commercial, she would punch up what was in the commercials. You started of Christian hosted a an award shows she started. Writing Christians. Monologue many of the things you ve christen say Monica thought of that'll take anything away from my perfect lovely one. Now and now it would not as he's way more down to both of us get around to give us like this. Let's see you kind of just basically running Christians life yet transition. Yeah and then I own her yeah yeah yeah answers your calls, not mine. Yes, yes, so this gives a lot of you
curious. How all this of all the end in then we decided you and I we like to argue: do it publicly yeah? Why now and then we started this podcast together here and it's the funniest thing. I've ever done me till. I love, there's nothing more fun. In my we re going to the attic with you in just in over anything does take much. It does not take much now we can. I wouldn't do any of this without you, you are so indispensable, you're such a piece of the magic. I I can't thank you enough for this. You ve, given me the mouse fun thing that I've ever done. The most rewarding thing we ve ever done, and so much
credit, goes demonic that people might not realise the added this shows he gets on. These calls me undies and talk to her medusa joy, there's about thirty seconds worth of usable information. She begged me and she books, gas and, of course Bobby, walk to the african beast and our whole lives sound and look great so icon. It. Other than my wife and my children. I don't think there's been a person in the last twenty years of my life. That's come in with that. I value more than you. I love you so much I hope we can get the laws in California to loosen up. So we can all get married fingers sorry way: marriage we want. On the other day we or hanging out by the pool- and his daughter said his daughter said you're paying out with beer. Almost girlfriend is up there and then,
prison was sitting there and she said she's, my almost girlfriend to unravel last. All of that is already. I that's right, we're we're. Wives were just certainly each other like a couple, a game, Cox yeah Enemy, so the way I should respond to that. Thank you for Matt and also meeting you guys and getting brought into the fold in the Bell shepherds the most special place. I've ever gotten to be a part of, and it is changed my life in such an incredible way and I'm so good. To have stumbled upon you to really really really changed. My life, Korea, israeli special think so Monica life story in a nutshell, there's so much
are we're. Gonna be coming out with Monica loves boys were really going to charge all of her many infatuation, it's very, very interesting. More than you could imagine. The puking stuff is just now, but the eye out it's full of perversion twists and turns peaks in vain you're. Like do we want to want to mess it like a pile up on the highway yeah. I gotta see it. What things are you guys danver? Thank you so much in the border areas. We love you so much and I'm gonna go fired. His wine bottle. Wanna, go back now apply here again now. My favorite part of the show the back check with my soul made me: Mamma go bad men who talking about you me boy. This is some mouse,
a key in one's own facts. Talk about you during these investigations is really import. We get an independent outside council to do. The investigation in this is Marcie as clear as trade very biased reporting about to happen. Whoop sees well good thing, we I say any fat. Oh, there are not very many facts and dispatch. It's always earlier. Ashore episode is yeah, and then I got self conscious about that of course occur. Why was it ashore? The just was short I gave you click ok, so we only we talk for about an hour, only the two, maybe a little over right yeah. So got so conscious or address was an interesting and keep me and the other is. There is never going to be a great outcome. To that whole scenario, I don't think we'll use
were you. There is no episode. We could produce that you'd have listened to a man like did it right, don't thank me. I mean What did you think about it? There is great crime why offering threw out? You were funny. You're stories were hysterical, puking, so great tat, delicious I guess, you're in secure. That's very now: yeah Irma AIR, but you, you know, word the lease objective when war and secure right that is think about your face. Look some like sometimes in the mere there are times that I am looking in the mere and I'm having one of those spirals. Maybe I'm picking May skins flaking and I look at myself in a literally think. Oh that's the. Beast from beauty in the beef when what I'm fucking monster you are,
and I really see that yeah. I now about the good artists and I could draw a picture of what I saw. That would be great right. But then you start evaluating like the way everybody else is in connection to add. So, yes, oh I'm in insecure about that, but then I started in your brain just start spiralling out. Ok, I mean you personally or me me in this scenario, I'm like oh but like when we have this person on alive. Show your reaction d says reaction. Is this and then when so, when it's me and it's not that, then I'm like it's bad, but again you and I are best friends- were together twelve hours a day, I dont mean old, Thomas Metal did so when I'm hearing stuff.
Finally, literally there's not one thing I heard from you that was a new information outlets as dynamic. If you interviewed me, you'd be borne out your tears bored are you? My lord to tears are born out of your mind. Four out of your mind, bringing resulting in tears. Don't worry, I would not feel that by you know, you're losing your reaction would be like wait. You got jump by a guy and then leave you pulled a guy like we already know that every like. Oh you, you know what questions ass to facilitate the story, but it's not like
he reminds gonna be Blount yeah. I would give up like the first time I heard about the puking thing yeah I was ecstatic. I was like a tap dance and unclasped. I now I mean look, that's a whole people still like me after that, because it is, they don't even have the full scope which is like. I don't know, if that's a story that you can tell the tip of the iceberg, just sound like just a loon. Now you ve, that's your insecurity. It sounds like an awesome like me, taking toilet paper and walking across the hallway, make it and touching twice that's exactly what it sounds like near. Like. Oh, that's, very specific and interesting alienated ok, so we do talk about. Is their money involved in arranged marriages,
or you asked was our money involved in my parents. Merit dry, look at our and no there was and cause there's was only theirs was unlike a real arranged situation, but dowries do still this growth, even though there are illegal and are not gray, twitter, illegal yeah. So I ran and give someone money, although if you're bind somebody that you're buying a person and as always the woman to the man, no, it's not good, but it's been robbed, though, if, when I married Kristen Tom just gave me like a hundred grand and can I would feel I see my dowries payment main cash. Kind to a brides in laws at the time of her marriage. The amount depends on a large number of factors, including region, religion cast and sub, cast grooms education, bride, skin tone and negotiate. Sean skills about the family involve skin tone
Zack, while even dowry has been illegal in India, since nineteen sixty one, it is dill prevalence back room, dowries act, the numbers are not known, but totally about half of the weddings in this person's family. The who are this article and friend circles involved dowry, I'd love to know what the biggest dowry of all time was. Someone give someone a kingdom, a billion dollars team. I'm just gonna, be going straight to cliches. Now a team of elephants- oh yeah, that's it I'm just a shower, but I asked my daddy text of my dad ass this this morning and he said depends on which part of India and then he was quick to say
a not hair, Allah Hashtag, not meanwhile, he'd accidents, a him he's a non Kerala Grandpa did not receive any dowry, oh yeah, from my heart grandma hearing where any money for their earlier. We were rewarded human gene if you're Grandma's dad also had to pay this lucky son of a bitch, the world's first and only perfect, is, he said, probably still exists, which now we know is true. Obviously, if the girl is educated and has a job will not Panny dowry, he forgot Some words in the metal by everybody said so. Education is a big aliment governs interesting, sad parties. The pretty ones are going to go quick and then you're going to have a couple of girls sitting around feeling, real sad that no one's picking and then you got to pump up the price you're willing to pay to get them married. I bet that's kind of
outward right leg, you remembering game thrones. When the M, the red wedding people remember, he wanted the start Harry his daughter right in and they show them and they were all no conventionally beautiful easier hand. He wasn't exactly aims again, like him, the Walter Fray, yes, Walter, Fray, Walter, Fray, you're Walter Fray, had to load probably a lot of money to get those gales married off cause. They were unconventional, beautiful, Ray yeah, I m sure yeah, I'm sure the price did depend on a lot of sad fact. I didn't write like calling people ugly. I know, but also you now, he I get frustrated with this. It's terrible to call someone ugly. It's also. Completely denying reality that there are people that are commonly regarded as good looking and commonly regard as on attract batches of fact on planet earth? No, I mean yes
I just think it's more gray them back to the reasons not gray is that they were able to cut to five daughters, and you knew exactly story wise. What was going on, but they were also like dress two horribly enabling Maddy Hair wasn't just their features. In fact, there are probably beautiful actually actresses that they made look dumpy Woolard heavily on conventional gorgeous. No, I'm just saying are you? Are we pretending that there is no consensus and looks there is as what did the people magazines or there is a consensus that the good looking in and I guess we're so inclined towards equality, which is a great impulse that it forces, as I think it times, and a little bit ly about reality. I just then you should ever be required. The lie in the pursuit of equality like not ever one's gonna be the same level of attractiveness. That's just that fact. It depends on so many does personality in all of these things. They factor into human, your physical appearance. They absolutely do
they do, but even what you're saying is? Yes, the raising your attraction level, like your personalities, outgoing and funding the be around that's a positive thing. Some people have shitty personalities, yeah, it's done. Unlike their looks, it's not like, they picked a shitty personality. Well now I think you can work. I am send out a way more than you can work work on it, but you're only going to go so far. You know of your a victim of a lot of trauma. Fucked, you me of developmental issues. You know, I don't know What what I'm saying is? It's a lie to say that everyone's equally attract. Ok, no one said that well, that's kind of what it feels like everyone's expecting. The future are utopias that everyone. Is equally attractive now out of the way- and this is where I normally think about when he saw the ugly dolls move in the hall message of the movie, which is a beautiful messages that everyone's beautiful everyone is
you two full in some way? Yes, they are. Every human has an implicit. Value beauty exactly. It may not be your face with that said, there is a consensus on a people being physically attractive or unattractive. Ok! I clean my worry. We know why ain't! I don't think, that's a hundred per cent! True, I don't think it's a guy. You know I'm right what about how the guys, what will nor does count for guys Women are much more forgiving of conventionally on track. Oh then, ok, if you're just talking about men's brains, yeah we're even females have, if you do see a line up in you see all JAG Nicholson, every he's an example. If you don't know, if you never seen him acting, you saw lineup of eyes. Yeah you go or that guy's not very attractive jack, never sent a standing.
Acts to Brad Pitt brought in a pig Brad Pitt. Most people are probably as a Brad Pitt is more physically trouser. Your hundred, Some people are gonna, be it I don't think a hundred percent I think there are people like different things and other people, and there could be people who look at Brad Pitt. Think this is very pretty person and that's not attractive to me. Ochre were pursues. You think it would be a true, really ideal. Ninety I can live with that anyway. My point is then, especially once they start talking, that would put that might become fifty, fifty, yes or no denying that we have hard wiring to be attracted dissymmetry. We have golden rule where the noses position on the face of these are like biological imperatives, that, with a car,
some cars are ugly. Everyone knows you see, which one cell the best like some cars or unattractive in some cars or pre universally attractive. We have an aesthetic built in our eyes. It's the truth. In our tower value. Waiting now reproductive fitness and stuff is not our fault. It's just a now. We can strive to be, as you know, tender and lovely as possible, but I don't think we should have to lie that some people are more or less attractive. I just I don't see what that gets us. I think it's a lie. What does it get us to not do that to not? What are you benefiting from saying this person is ugly and this person is? I don't want anyone to be told their ugly. That's how this conversation started. I said I'd wanna call anyone ugly than he literally realise their uniquely beautiful gonna Wanna, Cornwall that either right and then also I want acknowledge. That story point was crystal clear by one shot.
We knew exactly what was happening. Robert frayed could not get his daughters marry you now, while their free walk Joseph Fray. Could I get his daughters, married ray you now, the the hunchback another name Shreck, these things all there's a reason. Those stories makes sense. The beating the beast people have an aesthetic you. I think you know what I'm saying here idea I think in our pursuit of equality bees to pretend some things that just now, I think I also think you can often when you, you think that, like truth is at risk, a lot when we're having these conversations, ideal, yelled and that people are making declarative statements like everyone is equally beautiful now and I've never heard anyone say that no one saying that no one thing everyone's equally, this they're just saying everyone has something beautiful about them. They have a value.
A value and in those are the things about them that make you attractive to another person right. Let's do the real life example. That's happening right now. There have been schools that council problem, because some people were getting ass to problem yeah, that that is creating a fake world that they'll never inhabit yeah. Maybe they can artificially control that for four years, but that's not the world are not going to go to a bar when they graduate NGO nope. If I don't get out on a date here, no one's ray, it's urgent to me is what I'm talkin about. Don't think we were pretending. You know if one person's feelings are hurt, guess what the person you could ask for progeny veteran school, their own fuckin, Facebook all comes out in the watch. I now either sit around and say, like I demand to be seen as as attractive as everyone else is just one
you gotta go become attractive in another way. That's the world! We live with that, but I think that is the point. Is that that's where the conversation is trying to go? Is physical attractiveness isn't superior or to normality horse now now, but we ve grown up to think and so the new posts yeah. I guess it is too late. I didn't see ugly doll, so I dont know exactly how they pay. Is it just? What I worry about is it's like presenting a world where no everyone's, equally beautiful and everyone all like you for being uniquely beautiful. That is a beautiful sentiment that I wish. That was the world, but when my daughter turns thirteen and she's not getting asked she's like way, but this movie said that everyone's equally beautiful, someone's gonna have to. We know Europe. Apparently
data would say that there are fifteen the girls that people are finding more attractive than you, so you're gonna have to figure out, what's beautiful about your purse nowadays, that's right, but just around with the centres that everyone's equally beauty than than there are going to be left with. Well, that was a lie. You ve now lied to me about that, which is everyone equally beautiful. That were the case then we'd all get asked equally to the problem, but that's not gonna happen. So I started by lying to you and I'm going to follow that up with more advice. Why would you now believed the second bit of advice, because I lied to you about programme and its not alive it? There there's the thing in the that thirteen year old daughter that is incredibly attractive to people and that she'll need to figure out what that might not be the symmetry of refrain minor, how prettier her hair it absolutely might not be, but but but the there is some thing there is thing there. Yes, not it may not be physical, I'm not talking that bit rabbit amusing to peace. I think, would be more honest to start with
the reality or animals. We have all this wiring. We are drawn to symmetry drawn, this were drawn that whatever its bit cultural, sometimes when food scares were attracted to heavy set people when its abundant track, the skinny people. These are all elements. Of course they change with culture, but this is a human brain works. This is how young boys are gonna work. Does our young girls are gonna work, they're gonna like the tall guy with wide shoulders, it's in their dna? To do so a so that's the world did it, but if I so now, like I think really sweeping with a wide brush. When you say like everyone is attracted to this, and everyone is a boiler via this girls are treated this, maybe maybe there's a maybe there's a majority. May I just mean there's majority in them and then that's the world organ in habit and I think their best armed with the reality of the world are about to inhabit. Don't you think,
preferred for near thirteen year old daughter to look in the mirror and and think there's something good about that is the dream: Toby yeah, it's not gonna happen a thirteen year old. Unless she happens to be the most part pillar grown the school is gonna, look in the mirror and see something she doesn't like I get it and everyone does yeah I'd rather start by acknowledging what you're feeling is normal yeah? It's the it's your truth. I have antidotes to that, but it starts with. I acknowledge you don't feel attractive, I'm not gonna. Try to talk you out of hand, do it, but I is only gets helpful to say. Like ok, I know there are fifteen other girls who are dirtier than you like making all these comparisons. I don't think it's good. I don't think it's good.
To be evaluating yourself compared to all these me, I think we judge each of these areas at a young age. It that's a bad idea. It's not good and it's gonna happen yeah, but it's like. What's the best response to the situation I know they'll be, am I can't wait them to live in a world that doesn't exist? That would be great again. I don't think that's anyone's. I dont think people are saying we are, I think, a lot of parents here. There are thirteen year old boy or girl, say I'm ugly and they say no you're, not you're the most beauty, four girl in the world, the most handsome boy in the world. They, I believe that it be awesome. If they did you, don't your parents can tell you, where are your slotted in hierarchy of, looks at your school and they know that
they know you're just being kind to them and that you're trying to help and also you do think there, the most beautiful because they're your offspring. I we completely confused if daughters are the most attractive girls everywhere there at, I think they're the most attractive human buying planet, employment, but also recognize that me telling them they're beautiful, is not going to help them in this scenario therein. So here's what I think about that. I thinking in a very logical, rational world you're right as someone who never heard that from my parents I could have used, even though I would not have believed it right to know. Somebody believes that would have been helpful, yeah percent, but I want to ask you what if your parents said yours, smarter than all your friends, your more creative than all your friends
self starter? More than all your friends, you are currently brown, which is scary to young people, but, as you get older, they people won't have that cause they're, not that terrified of being with someone different. All. That's gonna change in your gonna hit an age where you're gonna blow all these are the water that the reality of what happened mixed with. Also, you didn't realize people like to you. I would argue TAT. I always argue. That's a game plan and it's the truth. You wouldn't know it's like that of what I would want disease if you're going to evaluate yourself based on how you look compared to join, Me you're gonna lose for the rest, your life, you can have a shitty fucking existence. If you focus on the things that are exceptional and wonderful and attractive about yourself in
put all your eggs in that basket. You're gonna have a much better life. I just think all that person here then, is okay. Well, I'm look horrible and there's a world full of Japanese and I'll. Never be that and great there's other things, but I want this thing that I can't have yeah you can't have it in the quicker. You accept that in life, the more productive your life's gonna, be I'm not gonna. Look like Brad Pitt. It's not gonna happen next, better dancer them Brad Pitt, funnier them Brad Pitt yeah! Those is focused on that. Anna. Oh, has four twenty ever overlapped with Easter. Yes,
twenty two thousand fourteen and overlap all war in time to be alive, yeah girl, day or a great day. We were time I've been a mad and you said that those guys went to Harvard, but only man went to Harvard only Matt Damon Winter area. Where did Ben go? I think he went to the University of Vermont or someplace in Burma, but then he dropped out. Oh, we do he's, not a college graduate now that a mark against him or no it's even- is a mark of supply. Applause, everything's whatsoever, Matt goes the Harvard. Was anyone Ben drops out its? If of course, yes, he made it despite everything, yeah a cold winter, especial ok! Well, I want a fact check something
I said, because we were talking about the Robin TUG, oh and Bob yes here and you asked me in theory: is it ok to fuck for money? And I said yes and I still say yes in theory, with caveats: if that woman is empowered, if that woman knows everything that's happening, if she feels like she's really mean the decision. Yes, absolutely I didn't say that, and I want to make sure that clear, because no, I do I thing even if they're saying yes, I want to often they just don't feel like they have another option. They don't actually have another option or they are not fully in touch with. What's going on so ride, somebody who is of course, yes, I want everything said that I've learned after that evening about Bob Crafty know this part about him,
but he's a widower. Now I didn't know that man, it's a bummer, I mean I'm sorry, but if some person is just is a widower love their wives and in need some human connection and that's the best they can do. I think that sad, I don't think that's like yeah monster. I don't think it's a monster. I don't think it's people are acting like a mind to me. It's not a story about him. It's a story about these women. Like that's the problem, the problem. Isn't it He went and did that and for me I guess for a lot of people. It is you for a lot. A lot of people are freezing. Wagon, like he's a moral? Nor now that's my issue. It's all right. Everyone's, a scumbag, everyone fucks up everyone, does regrettable things here in time, your pomp that someone else got busted for yeah some human
now you're here I just think the who are you kidding, I'm going to get it biblical to cast the first stone he loved the Bible loved by most just reading it before you got here and ask that that was it yeah, oh god. I have many facts. As I said right, you're upset about my opinion about the the attractive thing. Now I'm not upset. I feel I grant you know I do you didn't hurt my feelings, but I am just remembering back to that. It's a hurtful world, but I stand by the fact that I that I do think that would have been helpful to here and now from somebody on earth. My mom Tolmaeus handsome. All the time which I appreciate, and I know she really thinks I am here, but it didn't have any impact on myself evaluation. Fortunately, you now, I didn't look like Mason Hicks. I didn't look like Trevor Robinson. I didn't mean either handful.
I want to look like that. I look like yeah, of course not even that is that you have some confidence that you may not like the way you look, but somebody does. There is at least one or two people who do yeah. It makes a difference. I think I think I dont innovation. My opinion on. Nor do I agree with you. I guess the living on pushing back on his knowing you and knowing how stubborn you are knowing how long I've been telling you you're missing. When guys like you, I am inclined to think that you wouldn't have taken on that information regardless. We now Johan may well not consciously, and you feel like shit you feel like. Maybe this is part of that is my point. My greater issues of this.
I dont know if that you're the been very delusional about how you look and everywhere we go, people hold up signs and guys want to take you out because they, like my personality, now now also think about how their yes, they like your personality. They also think you're hot Then I understand you don't feel that way, but I. I wish you understood, you were wrong, that's my only goal is I wish you understood. Your image of yourself is dramatically wrong: hideous gay thousand percent.
That's all that's love you earlier.
Transcript generated on 2019-12-06.