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Part 6: Monica & Jess Love Tough Love with Patti Stanger (the Millionaire Matchmaker)

2020-03-18
In Part 6: Monica & Jess Love Tough Love with Patti Stanger, M and J welcome the Millionaire Matchmaker to the attic. Patti is direct and no-nonsense when giving her opinion on Monica and Jess’s love lives. She asks about their dream men, she prods for details about Monica’s fantasies and believes Jess wants to be chased. She talks about the differences between “beta” and “alpha” partners, differences between matchmaking in gay vs. straight communities and how she believes money and love are more connected than people want to believe. She encourages Monica to get more in touch with her sexuality and discusses the concept of “out of your league” with Jess. At the end of the episode, Patti doles out challenges that terrify both Monica and Jess.
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Aye aye Monica a k, a miniature mouse. I love boys, but I dont have one and in fact I've never had one I could probably count on two hands how many days I've been on in my entire life, and I decided it sounded change that I'm just an I love boys to and in the opposite way of Monica, I can't count on all the hands in America how many people have had sex with and yet I still don't have a boyfriend and I want one. Dax- and I love Monica and just in so many ways they He don't have partners, and that is a huge mystery to me because they're both incredibly attractive so fond so smart and have so much to offer. So we just
I didn't do. It was examined these unhealthy patterns and bring an experts and outsiders to help critique us. Advise us guide us pretty much called bull shit on us so that we can find the romantic companion that we're looking for we started. this thinking. It was gonna, be just Q little dating challenges that we would go on and talk about and laugh about turns out. It is very hard to be vulnerable in real time in public sire, so loudly romanticize pathological wondered at how much you want love God, you can't even get the sentence out. I would just eat around it's a little self and why do I want something? And then why have I decided to? We must put the chairman, the water, for the sharks to combat Veronica Lake. So apparently I have to join Riah sweetly legs. You don't even have a kiss a hair out any frontal lobe issues in the worship, raw located. What you should be doing more, serene every night robs to uncomfortable for this
please enjoy part six Monica and just love tough love with patty- stagger the millionaire matchmaker money. They don't like. I was very nervous, like the first seven in the end, and I Loomis actor true picked up on. Why are you nervous? I just get a little like a kid. I really exciting year, both exempt adrenaline nerves, all of em allow psychic, I'm not. Who is very psychic. We worked together a lot she went. First, one unloved line, you know its call in their like. I have a problem and he be like. Are you on the streets
How do you know that it's like? I can feel them struggling and starving and like he knew what every person was under yeah he's so into it is so intuitive, although we get mad at me at some time. cuz I'll say, like I love point, don't stay than on the air. I can't lie. Welcome also the sixth instalment of Monica just love boys. Sometimes I have noticed I've been saying, loves witches, grammatically incorrect. hi how's, your we use good. We our challenge. We did. We arranged marriages, each other, the said each other up without any expectation, but with people we want at the other person to just see, get exposed to. Maybe somebody we that the other person- wouldn't virtues fur themselves. I say you up with my friend Peter Peter: I felt very loose on this date. There was no expectations. There was no dick picks before there was no
expectations of an air. I had to put on. I thought you It's amazing! We had squirrel, I probably over eight, I ape of flour and a restaurant in LOS Angeles at our a before just so I would need so much is still a lot. We had fun. We got deep now we talked about a lot and he was cool guy, great teeth, great smile yeah. I would not have at him on grinder or tender. Maybe- and I am very glad I did- and I got a little bit of friendship vibes, but I dont know it was only the first date did get. Sexual a bit talked about sex, which turn me on for a second and then turn me off, because that's very me. What do you know? He was she a little too much like me, where's a little like it turned me on and titillated me, but then it goes. Oh, that's all just and I wanna maybe look too it's something he'd never been in love and he'd never had a boyfriend any as sex
it is ten times a week and that's very me and what I used to do, and that's not really what I'm looking for in the future so item, great time but I saw what I like about him was. The same thing is what I didn't like about him. That's interesting because I know this person and obviously I set you up with, and I don't think that's him not being having had a relationship is indicative of him not being able to have a relationship right? But I am also eleven years older, so that was an incident where I get in trouble lot for dating young, not young, he's my it still eleven years difference and for me, if I get thrown in
my face a lot that a date to young power line there, how I'm forty three and how does a thirty two? That's! Ok! It's he's ever thirty! I he's not in his twenty that if you get pushed back when you go for people in their twenties, because that seems like a total different playing field had the dead end a hug by him. Are you both and leaned into her, for I did. He leaned ended where did the ground? And I said, let's go too happy hours, Monica and or hang out again It was great, have since no one was it Tuesday, Tuesday, and it's Thursday today so having access to ok. Well, let's talk about that here, stinks are going. No, my, Instincts are friend so next time when me Monica go to a happy hour or something I'd like to invite him. Ok, but there's consistency. That's on relationship, so you're in the friends are now so the friends
this happened, because you instinctively felt who is a friend were eating him a chance. Now, here's the problem with gay or any gay community schemes. It would be same sex because it's not even if your buyer fluid it's different. Who makes the first move whom the initiation to have the next day or the follow up or whatever the case may be because like when women dumb regular straight women, damn we know the man that right conventional goes it do it, the other way were chasing them and then they think they. We want sack Sturgis Programme to believe that, even though its natural, ok, so in your world who makes the initiation after that date the one that's more excited. you're getting into the hall, I'm gonna form of foresight, thing which really where you're at That's where you need to shift your consciousness, because it doesn't work like that when you're looking for a relationship were not looking for booty, call right throw a dollar and go tender and you got it right so
you initiated a heard. You don't touch people you don't like. So do you psycho analyzed too much your dates? No, I don't think I do. I was in the moment the whole time, so you wanna be chased. You wanna be the beta that's it yeah. That's it not to be thy it because I am the alpha. Most of you want to be the beta and you want to be more excited. Go out with you in case you and then you'll warm up to him to his level Abby yeah? Ok, we're done patties work is done so now we have to talk about. Why do you on tat- and you said because I used to be the alpha and I'm sorry- that being the Africa's it doesn't work. Basically what you're saying in life though not in relation no, not relationships. Will I've only of Ray Boyfriends and they all run the show ok. But that means that you been ingrained beta, as argued out, so I want someone to chase you when someone's fixing you are. They need to know that persons and alpha so the three types of types
female straight gay by fluid asthma. Alpha I take charge. Beta I follow. now the new one, it's only ten percent population. The androgynous person whose switches from mouth in Baden, confuses the world and you have to decide in the beginning. Women have to do this all the time, because now other straight men wanting to be beta, because women are making money now and their successful. And then the man's like. Will you make money? You meet the plans, you invite me, you plan the chip and you're gone. We second, he has the vagina is the ball array, because we ve been in grain to do that since society began and then Let me have a year mega money now. So I believe that I can see work well, only works. If the woman wants to be the alpha said, women that are in control. I say I loved that my husband is a and man Dominic Studio executive than I make the money and he walked the dogs and per term stay at home with the kids. We have that
Ok, but you gotta want that. If you are trained the child too. Not like that believe in it or accept it like I'm. I was you know, raised Traditional EAST coast, you so that wouldn't work me and I've tried to do the event of being the breadwinner, so the huge makes the money is usually the one who controls the story and then I got caught. I hate this I'm used to the man taking care of me. assuring me and I was find the hot beta Jim Guy, the hotbed of who wants to be taking her and then that model doesn't work for me like I have figured that out, you all have to figure it out. So what happens is we have to decide what did they want, the better the alpha and if they get in Johnny you want to healthy androgynous person because they confuse people. They switch back and forth like another, as they may be really handy in the house like I'll fix this I'll, take care of that, but then it comes to travel or comes to reservation or Amanda, that stuff and then almost like wait a second I'm concerned
who to argue and make a confused and nobody really discusses as a new really when you start relationship. When you get past sex, you really of conversation of how this is gonna work, but nobody talks about negotiations so human they chased and he's a beta so to bathers one on a date, the other night I dont know that Peter is a beta but its relevant to say the point two of the child the aim was to not put any expectations was to actively not perfect, but he'd want both of arguing that's bullshit he's too all these forty one. This game is over two, forty, three, forty three, you can't play. Let's just see where it goes. A forty three you don't have time whose work we want it. When the first date is hey, Person is interesting. I want to get too Oh him. But the first thing look he's a man
subpoenas, he is programmed and by the way he's gay, so he's programme to go. I could sleep with them and if you can, there's no second date, then we're friends, so straight or gay men are programmed to go. I could fucker fuck him miss Wanna tell, but they dont go second date unless there is sexual and Andy Warhol and they want to the re really get in your head. That's not that's! Not your Peter friend, but Peter is someone you could have sex with. Yet it is very late. Gonna be like a nonchalance tax. Since I got to go anywhere so you might meet at a party and that the same party or you say, let's go out for cocktails and a group and they might have up, and that will be one or two unnumbered done. There are not living in a relationship because your same because they're both beta, but why, in this case he wants an alpha, see now he learned something to that. He knows now. This is what I want. I need to seek out men that will chase me and I'm the sign. Fine, I'm the deal, I'm the jewel to be adorned and he will find that guy.
Because now he knows what he's looking for, but we heard you had a city shouldn't recently where you had some one chasing you, and did you like that really like him correct, there's a difference you have to like the personal chases you, They are not the same. They are not the same. He was as his horse He wasn't hard enough to their yoga up to now. The harmonised as part of this is this is a shame in gave I know, but but your feeding, my fire of, why I'm here. So what I'm telling you is here, I'm here, because I've had sex with four thousand, when I attacked we're talking about the unspoken word of sex, which is chemistry without chemistry of nuts, so we do know chemistry for the guy who chased them. That's why I'm like it! But if you like, the guy who who's your celebrity somebody the Hendrick Veal came to mind I'll get so the which are if he were
we're coming on to you. You ve really excited ray, and you probably so never should have that seven minutes before we start the packets. Ok, so think about that. So. now. Let's take it down to like from attend to any. He found a name, with a really good personality who super sexy unkind had some bucks in his I can in chase you, you be thrilled right. So what is is water is not seeking its own level here that's where the matchmaker comes in versus the doktor drew out his they, but because this is what I do all day long, not sing doktor just write. He gave you good good exercise. You'll learn him. I love doktor drew The point in the manner is water has to seek its own level for it to be Kismet taken into gay town. They move a little faster than straight. because women are, we note, don't always feel safe. That's the reason why, but in gay town there as this situation, where it has to be sexual and they cannot change what is programmed
their dna I deal with this all day long. I fixed up Jeff Louis he's in a serious relationship, a Scot cost me after gauge, he had to feel hot. What that person. there is no getting away from Minsk and got to feel the same way about Jove yeah. I can't get that out of you urgent as the dna is provided by real ere. I really appreciate this because I've had a lot of talks throughout the years with tax, and I do believe Sometimes he puts it tat her or normative thing. on me, and I tried to defend myself and then I sound like a making excuses, but I do think chemically that there is a different ballgame.
It is and they have no safety issues other than as tv, which means double condiment or whatever rubber, but they don't have safety issues where we have cause whirling well, you're, moving to fetch you gonna write me, you know like we. We have that, unlike bring it on its accolade rough and help revelling, tumble right exactly and so in that world, it's almost like. Let us sex first get out the way like undying Keaton. Anyhow, let's get out of the way, and let's see what else is there was under the hood of the car. So it's almost like relieves the tension in the room. I don't mind that, because that's the way their programmed and they should have what they want, and if that leads to true love. Who were we to say? We are not get one hundred percent, but that's important phrase if it leads to true love, because if you ve gone on five thousand, exact same thing. None of them have led to true love, something's muscle height, but it doesn't mean that means he's dating people at her and mortar seek. Doesn't he gets all my when we talk about that? I heard your dealing in the wrong pond. So what pond? Do you think
slave. First of all, the obviously the German in Abbey and all that stuff is cliche. That's it the binding day meat they still mean and they still hang out. They still have Saxony slogan, dates and like when people say of I idea in a hundred years and I'm a girl stray girl. Go will you go where the men go. If you keep getting these feminine things like yoga class you're, not gonna, meaning I accept the gay, token guy in the one that's married, like you- have to go where its indigenous, but then after screen and it's the screening thing where he might be offline, a grey he so hot I'll fuck. But then I don't really know anything about him later. Were chemistry takes the lead and is the spark, but we gotta get the layers like first, what do you have a job as compatible to what my future lifestyles gonna be like some money? And then you have to Oh two legs you on kids cancer- I want kids could sometimes they want to get married, have kids depends what it is and then you have to go to lick comedy sketches the glue in our senior years. You know we have to
able to live together. Do things that you too too three things that you sharing common. You know and that something that we don't talk about enough, because that is the glue it can't just be SEC Sex will not hold the house. Will these are our opposite, so I care about those things potentially too much torrent. Then I get stifled because, unlike either the the or aren't there or I do want to spend time spurs and will you have the wishlist okay? So you are to fix her yes with who hawkeye some market, the Jim and what is market. The gym. Do he's some thirty five he's looking he's an ex ressler. And has a job here. The trader. And these are working actor and in such a sound did you like the job of working actor? Trainer be honest, we are not playing we're, not we're not taking it out. I he gone, who I was hard on him again. We weren't you, even though the key was I
someone who makes good money. You just bought a house, he cannot afford house. I'm still taxing him, because he's hot actually know That is not why, for me, you didn't think he was truly. I was like you. I see objectively he's good looking, but I personally was not like, oh my god, there's nobody, my physical tonight, she's like look your backing. Emma he's tobacco must be. Do you look can fill him in during the week in gotta. Do them he super cured. He's got a good personalities. Friends with dear you're. Co host so can fit into the posse, but he's not the has. Your vows went off he's not the husband illicit. The thing is what house vs about a house, and that is very exciting. Maybe the this goes into our offer conversation. I don't think I need I'm lying you are so you can
get the sentence out. This is amazing, just be honest with me, but we are trying to protect some of these people yeah identities. This is what will not identities but feeling we weren't. You want me these people to feel like experiments? We like these people, but we do you can have them as friends, but we're talking about mates and NATO front are different and it does mean that he's not good. Looking guy, I know you did not mean to pry walks us. I get five thousand checks, I'm not talking about that and we're not these are not good quality, human beings or catches for some one else. We talking about the two of you and I we say no to people are alike there, like snowflakes, look here The thing that I was so people are you gonna. Do you dont like someone and the person text? As I say I just don't feel chemistry. I wish you best of luck in your search cause. I know you're such a catch, someone's gonna find you that's really what you're saying you're not right for me with somebody else's can be out there and if you had dated somebody who you know was not the one you are wasting their time. You should be crucified for that.
What were you lying about? about to say I think it's ok, a for me to be like the one with I do know what it's gonna be like. If you do the right thing and become your and when you resent that, I would add a you resent the shit out of you again, while the loved in the beginning to use. who's, paying the rent and who is doing this and whose soon that? But it depends, because you know it's so tricky in this city. I think, because up in what you wanted. You are very high,
no, I mean I don't even like entertaining on its something got it and when after it, so you have to think about. That would have a thing. nuclear. The had money, sucre by the House, if you wanna, which was the unresolved or a car or a trip or what You can't lie about that. I mean it's part of the soup, but I dont you are giving her out to knock on a second date, and that is the biggest problem. She's gone and she's gonna. Seven first dates with no second day is a matter. I am the ones that are at european level. You you, people know how to deal you're, not nerd,
that you know how why waste time life is short, you're busy your work and your asses up yet and pants, ok right I am for the shit anymore. Now we got a screen and we gotta Well, how much do we owe you if you find me Monica just love boys is supported by act As greens? We love athletic green list because it tastes good and you know
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don't drive, we don't want to go from does where the town you can have a child out of wedlock and now get married and be socially acceptable. Now, none country had that till recently I mean when Murphy branded on television. People were like. By God, and so now we have like a New York city while streets like wait. A second you ve child at a well men are not eager to commit as much it's. It's like the biology,
for you, the guy, the girl, whatever acids fix you up because that'll in place over and over time, and you keep going to that HU. We want me and how we want to me. That's not to say you shouldn't dated personally, but in her circumstance, how I am not sitting there like
Abu was there, are flirting. Was there some kind of chemistry you said no and all of them there was