Here, listening to the gold, Digger podcast episode number one hundred and ninety four gold diggers, I have been dying to have discussed on the show since the very beginning, she's bold I've, dick and beautiful, and confident in brilliant, and today she is here gold. Here's you probably already know and a door her, but I cannot wait to officially introduce you to escrow Lawrence now iskri the british model, represented by JAG models and models. One and she is it champion for believing that every body is beautiful and she is filled with just this. Beauty and confidence that encourages other people to shine with their own and her commitment is all about shaping the image of women in the media and having and told that use both too big for straight size modelling and not big enough for plus size modeling. She asked for. Sure own way, and today you good to hear that entire story

seeing her honoured in BBC's women's one hundred most influential women was one of the most Spiralling things I've ever seen and as fellow airy, airy real role model. I've joy, forces with ascribed to promote unreal, intimates lounge, wherein swim campaigns to speak all about body positivity, In addition, the airy ask are also serves as a brain ambassador for the National Eating Disorders Association and she, created than Nita inspires award and is working to generate awareness in support for individuals and families affected by eating disorders. Citizen This woman has made a true name for herself in an industry where she was told no so many times in this episode is gonna teach you how to carve your own path had a fine com, in during the darkest days and to really pays your own way. Even when the world is telling you know

for we dive on in. I want to share this week's review of the week. This is from Colleen Christ and its titled pep talk from a girlfriend she says I have this part gas playing almost every day. Listening to agenda is like getting a pep talk from a girlfriend bonus. She gives the best business advice. I'm devouring these episodes so fast, I'm actually worried about when I get caught up in a have to wait for the new ones, keep it up genome thank you so much clean. I ll reading reviews, and it really helps me to share them with the world world and to share this show an incredible people like Ispra and so it today's episode touches you. Would you just take a second only very view? I know it sounds so simple and guess what it is, but it will really really really keeps us gold, digger movement, moving forward Enzo without further Ado, I M just so honoured and excited to introduce.

Is very real role model in a sweet friend of mine, like jazz, dying out within Chicago ready eyes. It's a scam, your listening to the gold digger podcast, where we firmly believe that work doesn't have to feel like work self. Made millionaire and marketing guru. Jenna poacher will help you redefine what success looks like it's time to hear from the exports, listen in on onest conversations and learn the best tips and tricks that helped others pay their own way and craft. Their dream career if you're ready to dig in, do the work and tackle your biggest goals you're in the right place. Here's your host educator, photographer and Makin cheese lover, Jenna Culture, thanks to my feet, in an area for supporting this extra special airy, real role, model episode, zone of gold, digger areas, a lifestyle brand that makes all of your favorite feel good intimates apparel active. Where

swim with airy. Real movement airy celebrates its community by advocating for body positivity and empowering everyone to love their real selves inside and out retouch. Free since two thousand fourteen visit airy dot com to learn more major shouted to talk space for supporting gold digger toxic. Is an amazing platform that offers online therapy from a licence therapists from anywhere at any time to match with a perfect there As for a fraction of the price of traditional therapy, go to talk space, dot com, slash gold, digger and use the code gold digger to get forty five dollars off of your first month. You guys visits resources there. I am so thrilled and honoured, and just so excited that Esker Lawrence is on the pod gas today. Thank you for being here girl and some eggs

Finally, we make this happen and we were just together in Chicago and every time whither. I just feel this total permission to be confident in excited and you just bring out something so magical in people and just getting to watch your face. I'll meet you. It is insane the amount of connection that you can create and wall all dive into all of that good stuff, but first things first for people who might not Oh your story who is Ispra and what you do today and how did your path in full to get you to where you are right now I'll came right, let a man tat data, let's do it So I'm twenty seven now, but I started modeling it. Thirteen I entered L girl said receive motto that if any of you remember that back in the day with my mom is like he's cheerleader turning off the first ever pictures

Then we had like one of those home fans and we will try to follow my hair and it wasn't the whole thing I'm up against the war driver miracle, but I am she got through to the finals arms I headed down to London, which is about the two and a half hour three hour drive from my house which is kind of in the middle of nowhere. In England it's called Kidderminster. You probably heard of it. So I went down and again like it's a it's right not to win over the time I came in the top seven. I think it was, but I got scouted, which means that there was a model scout from atop agency in London there on the competition day, overseeing watching how the girls were in front of the camera and know how they presented themselves in kind of poaching, young girls. That could potentially be big models. So am, I was very excited because you know she was an agent he would scouted came ass, though it was a really big deal for me and I,

then subsequently ended going down to London. You know which takes a lot of time and a lot of investment from my parents doing shoots. Then I started doing little runways, and this was all kind of practice, because at that point, I'm still too young to actually kind of star earning an what became prevalent very very quickly was even now by this time it says about fourteen. My body was all ready to quote womanly mature curvy commercial. These are all the phrases that I style hearing that people are trying to define the way I look to a fourteen year old witch super super confusing, and you know at the time you already in high school and figuring things any. No boys are coming into the pit. And you know your body changing you, you know you others. He started my period by

then so already I was trying to figure out my body em and how comfortable like I was with it. So they all came to a head. I'd say when I but fifteen, and I did this runway show, and it was the biggest one I ever did was gonna be on fashion tv and I was backstage. Unliterary have to be basically completely but naked, but you couldn't maybe were tiny little tea string, nude thong, that's about all you! Ve got two m cover your modesty, and you're in front of everybody in front of other models. Who may be you look up to anything at the time you comparing south to and then the stylus they were hunting me options for clothes and outfits. I was gonna where on the cat work and I began trying to try them on and one after one, I'm in the corner like lap, I congolese over my knees, crime. This is not going to fit what the heck Emma.

And do like. I don't wanna tell someone like maybe there's something also I kind of acid stylist, and it was almost like a just flat and out of nowhere and it's very stressful backstage. No, they have to make sure everyone gets the clothes, and you know it's about to be shown. He just left Amazon you're just too fat. If in his clothes, what am I gonna? Do? I just don't need this right now like why you so fat- and you know your fifteen and you naked, and everyone tends to look at you and I climb and explain whether feeling was like. I was just like all my colleagues. I just want to go into a big black hole. I hate myself like I have to change that the sitting and then obviously out was fed back and then I was gonna measurements in the cap. Measuring my hips, especially not the agency and my hips were Dover, thirty six inches, thirty six and a half, and they had to be thirty

Hopefully they told me, you know only fifteen, you know your hips really shouldn't be that big. Yet, and so I was dropped and that process of you know being sat down. Sat down at the asian kind of busied. In saying you ve had a little testa of this dream. You know, now it's gonna be taken away from you, it was devastating and they gave me a list of peace paper which had about eight or nine different agents on in London and they said you should try these agencies. You know, maybe you'll have some look there. Oh, my goodness, I carry me. Not only am I just thinking about the horrible experience Since I'm just about the generally being told over and over again that my body wasn't right, I was then we're gonna have to go to other agencies, he might say the same thing and who could potentially many feel even worse, because I know gotten a you never know. Maybe someone will see the other attributes. Ye have soared,

you know naively I kind of go along to all the different agencies. You know around eight, some of them Clyde online, but a couple of them I went in and I remember there was a couple of agencies even had another form like a piece of paper that when you went into meet them, it would have the quality of your teeth, your skin, your then all the your hair, your nails and they would write those things out of ten like right there and then in front of you on this piece of paper GINO would be your definition of whether you would make it or not, and just seeing those things like even my remedy my teeth, maybe they got like a six out of turn than other. What's my deep night, you know just crazy things like that, and so I had no luck with that again. I was very closely

one of the agents, and then they have to have anonymous voting within agencies a lot of the time supporting one of the because was just like now, I dont think she'll make it so that was it. I went back to the drawing board like fifteen sixteen and ass I, what am I gonna do I mean I even applied to slip in Britain, hot model, ending end that and it was really like a k, a humble, de I joined a very local agency and that's very friend of its looked down upon I mean they dont get the quality of jobs that the big top in. I fancy agencies gap, but at that point I just didn't here I would like, as long as I'm at the weekend, trying to do some little muddling gigs. You know, I'm gonna be progressing so I found model may have the free online website and I put myself a man. I am I started connecting with photographers and being like. Please will you shoot me? I really love model

and I want to build up my own portfolio. I am obviously had a couple of pitches from the agency in from you. Neither the great photographers in London, but they were heavily Rita. And so I started shooting by myself. I started contacting clients sigh started, seeing kind of who was shooting for who I saw that as a seat. Michael test goes and then use models for their packaging. I contacted them directly like how do new model engine Maybe someday would get mad because you kind of under car. You know the agencies, but at this point as I you know, what I have to do this for myself is none else is going to so yeah. I start shooting China get my own work and then that went on for a few years. I did a lot of stuff for free and then I kind of fell

Really confident again, I was like you know why I don't care that my body still doesn't fit the measurements I was like. I know I have to keep taking steps in progressing I'm a nurse really enjoying it. So I was kind of said this. What are you gonna, giving myself my own promotions? It wasn't an industry where I'm someone else was gonna promote you. You know you have to go and get that promotion yourself. So I am a member working with a laundry company and just thinking you know what I feel like I'm worth more than I think at that time it was a hundred and ten pounds a day I'm eyes in underwear doing trade shows, so I would be in the long run, dry and I'd stand, and you standing up for a light nine hours in your underwear and then you'd have to keep changing its brands, wanted to come and see the different styles that maybe they buying to store, and I started really taking a lot of effort and time, and The learning about the different styles. I need the names of the different browsers. I knew

The staff and cycle unless more than their so yeah I gave myself. You know the balls to go in and say actually I'd like to get paid this large and at other times again anyone, no matter what industry or in you gotta give yourself. Those promotions please try and you know, if you don't ask you not gonna get, I then, in the circles of my muddling friends, heard about plus size modelling, and so I thought I heard about this before us an opportunity to be your own size and just be confident in kind of shock that doesn't matter what size you are you can be beautiful. I thought this is amazing. Kind of did start do my research. I saw how much there was a big booming industry in New York and it trickling slowly over into Europe, so I when and saw a kind of the top agency the time and in me Firstly, they were like no chance. You're, too small are you kidding me eyes like none in a nervous, this can't happening out he's dedicate like five

six years to this quest to these certain size and why didn't include Just now on. My story was how I made that sound like a quick in a moment from starting to rebuild myself in my career. It really wasn't I'm after getting dropped and having all that rejection. I took it very personally and I took it ass. You may needing to change my body and obviously the idols I had within modeling world became part of my obsession to want to look like that, because I had been told that I had to look like that to succeed and when you have someone else's body or serve measurements that you cannot attain, but you feel you have to to be included to be successful. To do what you love and I was a very competitive person. I stopped

but it is also a perfection, is time Virgo, and so I thought I just believed us out right. I know I can get down to these measurements and without knowing I basically haven't eaten disorder and body does mafia. I would look at myself and I would say at the time was probably a year Wes Fool, you know, maybe a sex max, I'm probably Monica for, and I thought I was huge. I would look at my body parts and I would constantly grab them. Try pull them back of it constantly measure every part, my body from my

to my colleagues and right diaries and less and write down every single colouring figure, everything out and then try and work are all gone the treadmill or do anything I could to being calorie deficit and with Larry Vision, do where her causes in the morning before I ate and now pass out in all of these things that was so detrimental to my mental and physical health. Just because that's what I thought the extent my hat go to to make it I'm so after what, for five years of that, then hearing the Irish Gonna be too small. I was just. Are you getting may start to swear I had based so much of my work on my size and felt like I'd, failed over and over again so many times and then to feel like I couldn't aiming at my foot in the door, because I can t see, all I mean Party, he just wants to just give it all up. You know Papa View is just like one another,

maybe get enough, I'm never going to fit. And this ideal. You know shy, stop this and, and of using all that energy and passion- and I guess anger- I felt like it just needed to change as I. If this is happening to me, I can't imagine how many the Gaza going through this, and also it's just not ok, and I think that was my calling my opportunity to thing right. I need to step up and if no, I was gonna change it then I'm gonna try and change it, and so I went to a smaller precise agency and I basic begged them. I said you know, I know I'm in between. They actually now have like a phrase in between is I mean I just do what everyone needs to be labelled in over. So I went back and I said I ve got these clients that I've been working with directly. I will bring them to you and let you have twenty percent of that money just so I can get on your Lord and potentially start being seen. As you know, someone

Who is between you know straight and applause, size and just see. If we can, round me and market me and see if there's any jobs and opportunities out there, because I said to them. If I'm the, model that is represented. That's the size shore late as a client somewhere that once that they just wants me because I'm in I found my finally healthy kind of balance, and I am representing the size of a woman because all we need representing answer. I ended up and you know, I truly believe that amnesia, the new or you call it niche. Don't you and slow. I was like I'm just gonna burn myself on being different. On being the only one this size I longed right, industry was opening up to more diverse some diversity. They were the first industry to kind of get feedback and a lot of stick for using girls that were too small. So there are some grounds

looking for slightly. Have you girls that people would want to see and could relate to more in someone Andre so and could relate to more in someone Andre. So I started building this little monopoly. promote and say I did that for two years with this the agency and now I'm around twenty, and so I go back to a really top agency in this took a lot of bulls because it was kind of going. Back to square one when I was thirteen, no scouted models. One is one of the biggest agencies in Europe and eyes terrified, but

I thought you know what I've ready bill is little niche and I feel, like I kind of deserve this representation that continue to the next level. So I went and I met with them, and she is a very fiery Booker, I'm very passionate she kind. I wanted to make a name for herself, I would say as well, which was which was interesting to, because you know as long as someone's hungry and passionate like I'm down to work with you let this go for it, and so she did. She signed me size like my goodness, full circle, look at this late hour five years, on I'm back with a toddlin agency, I'm being read and I can just be. Myself and I'm finally just the size, and I can have access to all these top their clients and opportunities and have the best possible represented, nation and I'm my size now and it's completely on my terms and that felt like the biggest wind. For me, and it felt like it was like step one as I write

We just getting started light, and here I am sorry that was supersaver, exciting and at the time, this is all going to die into why I'm here now at the time I was developing something called model kind. It was the first business I ever started with my best friend Hannah I'm a litany, drew the logo and we try to somehow get it electronically on the computer, I mean this whole thing was completely new, so create this brand and company model kind, which we then turned into a charge. Because, knowing so many models for so many years, I knew it in a very privileged career and we had a wonderful lifestyle. We got to do fun things and I thought it should be something that we use creatively to try and make a positive impact. So my best friend Hannah recently lost one of her close friends to cervical cancer at only twenty nine years old.

Because she never went first near test, and so we will all then very aware in I started having my snares earlier than I was actually legally allowed in the UK. I had my first merit: twenty one, twenty two and legally, you can't have a smear in the. U K until you, twenty five Obviously, when I knew of someone who had lost their life to it, we just follow. This is something we needed to campaign about, remove the stigma about talking about cervical cancer ensnare tests. So as it right, we ve got a bunch of models. We know bunch of you talk affairs and we work for laundry company. Let's do a charge calendar and raise money for this so It was the first time, and I mean I didn't even think it was a big deal. I was like these are just my girlfriends that all different shapes sizes from different backgrounds, they're, just gorgeous girls. I happen to know so we got ourselves

some underwear and we ask that the laundry brand would pay for distribution and pay for the costs to print the calendar which didn't cost that much but we'll be promoting a laundry obviously- and so we got all of that through and we managed to sell five thousand calendars at ten pounds and we were able to give one hundred percent of the profits to the several kinds of charity and while we were making this calendar, the final process was, we did all these sheets and what was also was the girls shots, in there they invite they loved or doing something they loved, so is trying to redefine the yes tat, beautiful girls, but they're beautiful because of who they are and what I enjoy and their accomplishments and Hobbes in so many different things like that, so I shot, for example in my kitchen baking I love baking. I love eating when I make it so every everyone

like in the elements, and you know it wasn't just defined by how they looked. It was kind of what they're doing and how interesting everyone is, but the final step was of talk of a come back to me. Sang highest, grew so I'll be out to get the final images back in a couple of weeks. I just need to re touch them and something this happened in my head, whereas I can be don't touch my friends as there are already beautiful Joe the way they are. What are you gonna? Do? You're gonna try make them better than they are now, and so it became this kind of yeah dickie feeling my stomach flowers like. Why would you Rita These beautiful m heavily perfect human and there you know, I don't know, that's not gonna make them any more peaceful. Oh, they can't be perfect. That doesn't exist, so that became like this little feeding is time. My stomach of light, I need to talk. More about this. I need to change this and it gave me these in a questions

made me rethink of all the times that I've been retouched and how any feel so that became again like another passion of mine. Another drive to talk about it and make a change, and so we put the coming out there and that was early, two thousand and twelve to thirteen. I think it launched two thousand thirteen and then two thousand and fourteen came, this campaign could airy real and I I heard about it because one of my friends from when I was fifteen doing those shows when I was younger and who did make as a successful model, because I remember she was much slimmer than me, and I remember looking at her body and thinking well, I'd love to skinny and I remember seeing her. You know healthy and I'd, say courier. The real campaign that was in America as well

They are so on it over their eyes at this self worth thinking- and I saw this Brandon. I saw that they used a couple of models from Jack models and, as I have to get in touch with them. This is my dream, then not retouching models, what the hell like and models are different sizes, as at these guzzle or semi can say how confident they are. Even now you can see some of their Sunday lie or stretch marks, or you blemishes, whatever it might be, that they are all beautiful, confident and I love what that promoting, and it's making me feel good about myself and others, like that's everything leaving I'm so I found out about Jack. I did my research and they came over and did UK scouting once a year in September, side begging. Agency as I have to be included in the scouting trip. I have to meet them and I did I met them in the September and the other must have in two thousand and thirteen

or is it doesnt work? My I'm, my memory is not the one that I met again and again the may. You know they did Tommy the reality. Is that the end of the process market? In the? U S, you know how he had to be a foreseen, and I was like a ten twelve, but I said you know. Look a wife carved out here in the UK have proved that you don't have to fit into that. I you know I've been working on my messaging and my branding. I have something really important. I want to promote and I want to make, this change and I want to make this impact over there. I want to be part of this brand airy, I'm obsessed with them. I know about the campaign, and so they did take a risk on me, and I was I think was gone. The border or one of the smallest girls on the board and that they took on yeah. That was in the September in November I already had applied for my visa in February. I went

over to do my like trial, and so I started looking jobs almost immediately. I was there for six weeks. I think, and in that time, as like this is meant to be. I have to make this happen. I I basically kind of broke up with a guy. I was saying I left the house that I was very comfortable in I had been a best friends. I lived where they were incredible. They told me a lot. I left my parents, I'm an only child kind of Bristol. All I saved and saved I saved up fifteen thousand dollars and I may to New York, knowing absolutely nobody finding a housemaid through a friend on Facebook. She had Facebook, I didn't have Facebook at the time and through her and we met up in Brooklyn, her wholesale. She goes yeah. You can stay with me and

We all remember she was funny again. I'm kind of going off topic bits, a funny story, because I'd me just moved to New York. I got to the hotel the full hope I've been walking around and I had the worst I changed. My legs were on fire. I even had got my heat ration between my thighs, so I walk into hotel room and I'm late, she legs spread wide open putting on the screens try and cool down my fight shape and she walks in complete stranger who I've decided, Undines live with and she goes on. God Gimme. Some of that, my buys a killing associates is Larry's moment, as I ok clearly yet, and clearly good you're, comfortable, I'm dumb to oil. Let's do this. We're gonna live together and have this adventure, I'm so yeah that was the beginning. May and then less than six months later, I've had my casting an I shot. Ring summer campaign for Ray in Miami, and it was

just unreal and humming of zero lots happens. Since then humming such a long story I feel like I'm, might be boring everyone that yeah. I did wonder on the very sad and I remember thinking, suffice they shoot nausea I'm not one day, go I'm not just in this one day and then you're gonna get rid of me, like you the senior lot more and so again I just hi to go above and beyond and be very clever about falling in love with the bran, so that I could be the best possible model because in I think some models might jesting. U turn up and you can you know where the clothes and you can go home. As I know, if you really want to fall in love, The brand understand the product understand how it feels at the end of the day as a model, you are promoting a brand, but there's so much more to it than that. You wanna be a spokesperson. I wanted to figure out How-

I could bring my own special talents. I guess, and creativity and passions to this brand to help us both speed as successful as we heard, and so I just saw the huge opportunity and I just loved what they were doing so much. I mean why not be obsessed. Why not think I can do so much more and we can work together to already built this and create this movement and that's what it became. I went into stores just off my back and I was talking to store associates. I was wearing the product they'll do twenty four seven me now. I was asking a store associates, how they felt and what they liked about the images and how we can improve that and then, at this time it was like the same time as Instagram was coming onto the scene. I remain by seeing and then thinking. This is

the beginning. Do you remember what it was like generalised filled, son sides and popular those are no captions summit. You may do not at those instagram. Those old filters I mean just posting dogs constantly I mean we still of dogs, obviously and food, and not really having a clue what it was meant for you know, you're, not really realizing. That was a purpose. Do it yet I'm just kind of feeling, let you just sharing with friends like what Europe too and pretty thing and then I remember having the sheep back, and it was one of my first sheets in New York and I felt so empowered because I felt sexy ever held a sexy eyes. Look you my body and as I am so much thicker than I've ever been, but I feel good about it like I could it wasn't retouched I asked to get the rule photos and that became something. I was very proud of. Two always post role, photos of myself, not retouched filtered, and I posted.

And I just at this moment of just wanting to be very honest and open and wanting to share, and you have a bigger problem moment, I think, with my friends and celebrate how far it come with my body that I no longer had maintained disorder. I no longer had body to small fear. I just saw my body and felt grateful for it and thought this is Orson anatomy. Really positive, confident place and at the time I only had a couple thousand followers which is still I guess a lot, I think, as a model, because you have those type of photos, you just attend to gain more followers, and so I post the up, and I think it went viral. I think not. I didn't know that was at the time, but it got a tunnel likes and yeah my following grew and then, when the airy campaign came out a few months later there this one image in particular, and I do remember at the beginning, seeing and thinking. Oh I'm not

The understanding why I was feeling like a bit scared for the whole world to see it when all this is nothing wrong with. It was a beautiful image. I was sat down and I was twist sting and the way I was sad. You source looked like you, Oh roles, like very natural little fat roles- and you saw me twisting- and I guess, enhance that and I was laughing- smiling a super confident and this photo at the time they were using Emma Roberts. He was on american horror story and so before I knew it, I remember going on twitter and seeing that picture of me and then seeing it posted by one of those quite nasty accounts, and it said this is the truth.

American horror story what's wrong with her stomach and those like what what's happening, and then I saw at being retweeted like twenty five thousand times as all my goodness, and there was it was horrible disgusting comments is comments about me. Like your fact, how do you have a disease what's wrong with your stomach and he had a c section, how many kids ass she had all of these comments. It was super super confusing and what is going on. But then, on the flip side, thousands and thousands of pounds of comments goodness finally image of a woman who is just natural and feeling confident and looking like everyone else does when they sat down like this simple, and it was just a moment in my head outside Why have we never seen an image like this? No longer a campaign as like? I don't think we have, because usually their highly poet

you know the models are either sucking in others, some Photoshop at play and all these things- and I thought wow. This is First I mean it shouldn't be they should just be completely normal unnatural, but I was like I'm so excited I got so excited. I like I wanna, do doesn't markings images that will make people think twice or question people even close controversy and just show the real ness and show them that this is what bodies look like, so that just find me up again. So this was another viral moment, so you can't plan these you, you just can't they just then, and you have no idea what you're doing and it became a spy, I will. I became so confident and so ready to like make me stands and be more of our call him feel like this is what you to do online. I, like your men, to create these conversations, your meant to show each other and empower each other and create this kind.

Unity of support, and so I was I that's just like right. I know exactly what I am doing now so that is that Israel how I'm here today, because there was people who supported me, there was people, he said this is what we want to see. You know in the industry in billboards. These are the images the IRAN make us feel good enough, and so I would say the reason I have a successful career is down to the support and the love from all those people out there. Followers consumers who can have invested in I was doing in my message and my purpose and enabled me and enabled other branch to think that so they need to do as well So that was other moments that went viral like I don't know if you ever saw it, but all of us he got fat shamed especially the evening before people understood that it so hey to be the size. It's ok to model at this size is

keeping a laundry model. I got a lot of criticism because most of the time made only seen, I said in size, a certain look, a certain perfected illusion in San fantasy and laundering. Campaigns, I'm anyone ready for the river this a lot of the web, some people and some people still on, and so I remember that was his comment and they he went in heart. He said that I was the reason that the health care system was after I was the reason that everyone was getting a diabetes, and dying from obesity problems and I said, it's disgusting and I needed to put down my chips and my Mcdonalds I read this comment. I was on a shoot, a laundry shades and I looked around an assault on the smack tables each other. How does not table there was a bunch like lies and lies in nice, a box of chips. I immediately without thinking I didn't planet, I didn't mean whatever I just picked up these criminals, like hey so the make visor like we took videos me as it Leslie

slow. My be funny in my underwear get these bag of chips and I e a chip and I give this guy the finger in slow motion because, in my view, I'm still gonna eat my chips and love my life and be proud of this body and everything I stand for supposed it up is video again not thinking any then just thinking my friends again, a laugh at it and went viral have eight hundred million use in like a worry my followers. I basically went up a million followers in less than a month like I lit she went from you know. Maybe I was on. I think on seventy thousand. I went up a million followers in than a man. It was wild. I would just look at my phone. It would go a hundred thousand new followers, I would like to see a man was like we stand with escrow model escrow this model do I don't wild be

That was really it people just thought: yeah F, you! I don't wanna, be told. Why needs a tea or how I'm gonna look, and it was, I think one of the first townspeople had really talked about and discuss trawling and bullying online and which again is a huge, passionate mind, something I'm even still the militias and communications act. My next mission, is that I want to reform the militias and communications act in the. U K, it's really outdated. It's from nineteen eighty, eight house. Possibly have the same laws and jurisdiction when we now have social media social didn't exist in ninety eighty eight. So that's a topic for our next part caused at night five, ten years when I've managed to worm change legislation, laws on that, because that Stephanie something needs to be done and yeah. I think just feeling saw empowered, there's nothing more empowering than people validating your

Your voice and your your purpose and things that you're fighting for and then saying I believe him two like we all support each other. Let's go for their side. This is what needs to happen. This is how we progressed. We stand strong it gather, and there has been such a movement for female empowerment, and you know I'll area has been a huge part of that and taught me so much working with Jan foiled C, O and Stacy Mccormick, whose head of marketing and now she's even moved up and she's feeble and, as just so many strong women who have been my men tours and you I've learned from and who have got me to this place where anything is possible. Like. You sang Jan I'm, not just a model. I've not limited myself to just thinking, that's all I can be. I can be absolutely bloody anything and I can go to Congress like I did

last year and that no early this year I am representing the national eaten sort of association and be very confident at being able to be vocal in voicing that. You know. I know that I can make change. I know that we all have power and we can use our voice for good I'm going out in doing that and I'm very passionate about letting other people now, regardless of what you do where you're from where you are, and what size of a platform you have, you can make a change and you can make a difference and make an impact and like we set in the real token Chicago, even if it's with your family, your friendship group, but be that positive change that you want to see any

One should feel empowered to be able to do that. So I would like to say that that's probably we're home that right now, I'm working on some different things. I specially love using my platforms and I'm gonna, get that more into my achieving and do myself care Sundays and working on my everybody platform to promote health and whileness, for all and fair everybody, and so you are working on a bunch of things that I don't do anything that I'm not excited about. Am I don't do anything that I have any sort of negative energy around I just step away from it. I've had failed is obviously you know. I had a lot of noise at the start. I still get Some nice- and I know that No just means I've gotta, be more clever, I've gotta think outside the box. I've gotta go around the obstacle or jump ivory I'll go into. If there are important, dig it and dig a hole,

just be backing get there. I've managed to get here. So the fact that so many people topping no, I mean even the agency. The first agency that took me on there were in the plus side side. I asked them three times. Could you just submit my photos to it, your agency and they laughed at me? I remember: how did she bought a square? Don't be silly? I you know that we value you're never going to be big enough for that industry, and I wouldn't even submit my photos and night. Not everyone is going to support you. Not everyone is going to say shopping, you know just jump on my back and Wigan you MIKE. It's not like that and I think being real about that super important, especially if you have a successful platform b, honest about how hard it was saying. How many knows you got say how hard you had to work? It didn't happen overnight and you know even still, I plead the odd thing of z about myself.

When it's can kind of seem like. Oh, you know she got famous off events to graham- and you know this Ray was handed to our and like to learn. I like hell no and don't let any noise. Don't let any obstacles to tell you, you know, let it feel you let it be viper it on. You know why I know this is why I have to do I'm willing to put in the work to get there get excited about it. You know I always now see knows or if I see something like why someone not doing now Why is it not like that? I get excited because, unlike maybe, I can be changed or maybe I can create something or do something bridge that gap, or maybe there's someone I know and unlike hated go, do that go be that person all right. My best friend, if, with at the moment and use hanging around, I can see it in the background by I want her the brakes, simony boundaries. I want her to be. Oh, my goodness.

She's weigh upon the face mosque. All my hysterical she's, the best his breast. The area have ever used. Go now lay like that's a huge when you know pushing those boundaries- and you know we're require biggest sizes, and we want to make sure everyone feels represented. So there is always more to be done and as intimidating is that can be or sometimes disheartening it can be, and I think you fellas while generous like there's so much to be done or am I didn't know you know let it just takes by us and let us figure out you know, even if this isn't my challenge orphan. Maybe this isn't something I can do this. Someone out there that is gonna, do us and is going to stand up and is gonna, be that representation and that's for stir, help empower them and help them to realise that they will be that power or they will be that change. So nice divulged from my story about the crisis,

yeah yeah it's. Why I'm the way, I'm so yeah as gold diggers, we have a lot on our plates and I've always wanted to have the conversation about mental Health, which is why I am so excited to announce today. Show is sponsored by a company called talk. Space is online there be company that lets you message a licence therapist from anywhere at any time. All you need is a computer with an internet connection or the talk space Mobile app. That means can improve your mental health, even if you ve had trouble making time for it, affording it. Or prioritizing it. In the past I get you're busy, but with talk space there Peace is as easy as sending your therapist a message. Remember that there be isn't just about venting your innermost thoughts or digging into childhood memories. It's also about practice. Everyday strategies for stress management regime,

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talks and special events throughout the country. Airy real means something different to everyone. For me, when I was named the newest area overall model, it was literally a dream, come true seriously getting to empower women to work or the company whose focus is on representing all women, to redefine beauty, Sanders and show up on retouched, not just in images but in life. It's pretty much the last thing ever I wanted from you to share one eggs, you airy real and take your unready touch, photos and videos online. Just take airy head on

where to airy dot com, to learn more about this movement? The boy here a little bit about the recent campaign that came out with area, because I know both of us were just shut in such a beautiful way of seeing all these women show up in just kind of share a little bit about that, because it is making waves like we knew it would by just walking into that store and seeing all those images and your mother was a part of a campaign. Can you talk a little bit about that over one hundred percent? do you not feel on animals like, I feel all on aids to even just be get to be included in man, and you know some people want to be on the cover evokes. Amid a woman do x Y see you, I was in the most progressive, positive, inspiring campaign that the world has ever seen. I'm gonna put it out there like this, has not been done before and I think the most beautiful part of it was seeing all of these women

just completely unique, just so beautiful in their own way, and they came to set an offer. Them were terrified and even made himself sick would terrify it. I mean it's terrifying being in your underwear, knowing that you're not gonna, be retouched, then wondering This gonna be in store for the whole, we'll see in times square. Am I going blown up in business, much. You know fear around this coming into it, and you know I was there and I got to speak to the girls first hand, the I got two she with and the only one terrified thoughts. They were also beyond excited because they knew the impact it was gonna have an there's, no better feeling than going into something. Knowing that it's going to inspire someone else, I'm an all of these women, regardless of their fears, they showed up for themselves and they showed up for every other.

Person that they now need to see that representation and they went there and they celebrate themselves. They celebrate the movement, they celebrated real and that's what it was. It was just a love fast I get seriously was everyone was having a love fast? They were seeing the beauty in each other and not letting not take away from the beauty that they had and as women. We often pitted against each other. What kind of from a young age talks to kind of complete or basic value system and our work on how we look and wages? it s not like we're all also opiates as well, because we're different am I going to show that a million a hopefully not give you ve said enable and give permission for everyone else that visas, images and it is in this world to celebrate the real them and, I'd say it feels if you haven't got into an airy, store, yeah or seen the campaign go online right now go into

still right now, just see all of these women and a lot of them have really struggled with either self esteem issues with illnesses with so many different things that could have stopped them from feeling that there were good enough their standing up and saying. I know I'm good enough. I've always been good enough and I will continue to be because I'm me and I'm allowing you to feel the same way and that's the feeling that we want so many photos sheets and as a model. I know this because I've seen at first hand about elite is an exclusive achieve saying you know you have to aspire to look like this or to openness or to have this lifestyle. It's the opposite ways. Instead saying we want you to feel good ass, you are who you are right now I'm, and that is what the me man is, and so there are no barriers to entry in. I wear saying we're all here: you're, all here, you're old,

enough just the way you are, and that for me, is the most impairing message and I could not be more proud to be in this campaign, but also to have met, or these incredible women all told me something about myself and about the world and given me so much of an open, mind and again, just making me less and less judgmental, but more aware of just how we should treat each other and how we should vote each other and how we need to celebrate our selves and each other to all make such a positive impact so yeah this campaign Ross, it's so good. It's just so called through to watch people look at the images and a kind of find someone or some shape, or

color. That is like representative of them, and you know I think first so long. Just like you said you look at campaigns and you never saw yourself being represented, and I remember the first time I met you. You said to people. If you do not see yourself being represented, you are the representation and I think that this campaign, sums up that quote in a million ways in so many amazing ways, and it just like when I see those pictures it just makes me want to bar I'm not on a state with a woman I yet girls, just automatically just tearing up just like imagine, okhinnah areas create something

makes people feel you know finally seen for the first time finally had just it's just such a wonderful, wonderful movement and there's so much. This happened in the last five years with airy, and I remember I've spoken to the team. So much- and I said you know these guys, wanna being the campaign, so the difference is most girls, don't think that they could be a model because I've been called or they haven't been shown that they could be a model in the campaign, but when airy started everywhere campaigns, girl, started messaging me saying: how can I be an aim? I finally believe I could be up there. I see myself in new. I know I can do this to that's, never happened,

for some members, sharings very team, and I think we need to get these girls in the campaign because they want to be part of this like this is the only time like people are really genuinely felt that they could be up there celebrating themselves and felt like they deserve to be part of this campaign. Everyone deserves to feel represented, but no one ever believed that they could, and that was a huge shift and I remember saying we have to run a competition, and you know it's gonna make them feel so included. You know they are part of the brand. Let show that lets. Let's make these images happen and it's always been such a tricky thing to do logistically. To be honest. Logistically I think that can hold a lot of companies back, but I remember when they finally so we're doing it were running a competition unreal Gaza. Can we in the campaign over all like those huge all of these girl, honey in hundreds of girls who have been messaging me for years, saying that they wanted to see themselves in the combat. It actually happening, and I mean

each shows by the its it was a ripple and any, and now it's just as huge wave and I'm so excited to see what we do next and how we keep pushing forward, because this has been a major. This is life. Changing this industry. Changing is basically kind of showing every other brands like hey. We did this time for you to step up to like it. It's Knox. He says like it's really showing to somebody people think not people genuinely social. The time lag. Model sound like real women, don't sell and its. I will We're here were being myself,

the booming very we're doing. Well, I guess what we're doing good things important things and we caring about our consumer. We care about the images she's consuming about how she feels when she shops, I mean even down to the designers. There's design is in the campaign, but I've spoken to the designers at the NEO base and they said we are thinking about how that girl feels when she puts on her leggings thinking about these parts. Is that we want her to win and for her not for having to feel sexy for a man like this, so many other messages of inner self acceptance and self worth it airy is putting out the just not require you to be anything, but yourself

I'm so yeah those desert there's a lot more to it. I feel like as well airy works so hot from the call it is in the dna they're. Just try to empower you all serving good is one thing that I value so much about you in just your story in the way that you ve pushed through, and I think that not a lot of people understand all of the nose and a here so often bring people. You know I tried that once and it didn't work her eye I reached out, and they said no, and so what would you tell our listeners today if they ve had a door closed in their food he served, they ve heard no so many times that they believed. That is their answer. How do you push through and get to work you know, you're being called to be. I love tat. I love that so much and I think one of the main thing

is the initial. No, the you got. That's gonna give you that sinking feeling in your stomach, that's gonna! Wanna bet you cry, that's gonna make you feel like you just have to. That's because you never do it. I always say embrace every feeling, every motion except it, but don't harbour that that was a passing moment right now and back to work. Yeah, ok, they might say no, but maybe I just didn't convince them enough. I think a lot of the time people have to be one hundred percent in belief or thinking it's the right idea and that's really hard to do to get someone one hundred percent on board, if someone's, if he at all, if they have a question in my mind the public and say no to either protect themselves or do not have to take a risk or that also terrified of failure, so that no for me it's just not right now aura, let's get more creative, let's sit down,

Let me brainstorm how I can go there and really convince them. I also question myself as well. When I get a no. Unlike do I fully believe in what I'm talking about or do I fully believe this is what I meant to be doing and it you know. Sometimes. I have taken gone down the wrong person times. I have gone down the wrong route. Sometimes I have had to say: ok clearly, this wasn't meant to happen. What you know. This wasn't right for me, but let me figure out what it was. I was went to be doing in pursuing and working on a building, but I think you know we're in this day and age where you know it's. It's too. Easy to? Let a no stop. You know don't bigger person. You are resilient nuanced, strong. There is so much that you are capable of. Don't let that no stop you. You know it's a tiny little roadblock in. I am quite often it might just be that one person, maybe you need to speak to someone else or maybe look

but more time to develop yourself a your idea or your business and then go back there. You know when you off fully ready or you can go about their stronger and I often if you ve got no and you go back and try again. They gonna have so much respect for you and you can only come back. I'm just give it your all. I've I've met so many girls, you, especially in a war, the modeling industry and I all, but you know an agency. I didn't take me on, and I was like this about. I was at least ten agencies didn't take if out of list into them people

there are always know what's best for you, you have to figure out what your path is. I'm and yeah. Your is also you gotta protect yourself. I never want anyone to get to the point where they just fell so deflated that you have to have those protections in place. You have to have your cheerleader surrounding you support wherever you can, but just caught just always keep that self worth and that value in knowing you are doing the best you can and keep trying keep trying? Nothing is gonna, happen overnight, and they should therefore very very lucky. I think it's not realistic. How often were told this success stories online.

Is it that you know and she just got found or happen overnight overnight success. I really dont believe exists anywhere, I'm in any company. You know I have a friend that got super upset because she thought she was gonna get a job. Promotion should never actually applied for the job promotion, or even that has seen you know that she wanted it. How can you complain about that? You ve got to ask you ve got to even if she didn't get it a fight. That and say you know what could I've done? Well, you needed to apply or whatever it might have been. Might you ve got to keeps showing up for yourself? You are, at the end of the day, gonna be your biggest number one fan, and I hope that Stephanie something I've kept to mine and if I don't have it

Leave me? How else is someone else going to have any belief in me? I, like you, said it takes up a long long time to get then keep investing in yourself and maybe stuck up those knows. You know why the fact that I can picture- and I remember all those times I got no and now I've- prove them wrong, and now I am, I am that's empowering to me That's right! You know why I knew what I could do. I knew I was capable of a cat going so silly, ass a reward, the harder it is to get that more rewarding in fulfilling its gonna, be so also let those struggles that those obstacles teach your lesson. Let them make you even more hungry for it. Let them be your feel sometimes, and then you get more creative, be humble asked for help

ass, a huge one, make sure you ve got mentors, make sure that your surrounding yourself, with a diverse group of friends or mental, you can teach you different things help you see different angles and different ways that you can work around things age, I think angels or any important one enough you're. Just within your age group, the certain things that you're gonna be talking about learning, but if you start diversifying and speaking to people who were much older than you have, you have a much greater experience, not just in life in Korea, maybe in what you want to go into often for how often for advice. That's it. That's been a huge thing for me as well and again sitting down my agency constantly having my short term mid term long term plans having my mood boards.

Brainstorming sessions envision board so that I can keep in touch with me going forward taking steps forward, and even if I am, I fought off a girl. You know, and you come back with a little bit, knowing that this is one of working towards all of those things will help when you have a no having not grounding that foundation that substance that right, what am I gonna do now, as I said, where can everyone contact with you after this ever gonna wanna know, is graven more well? Obviously, my my biggest connection points is Instagram. It just escrow that idea Haven't you cheap, and that is also now you to dot com for US escrow, I'm. I will be getting more active on their again. I've moved house, then I'm such a big advocates itself.

I was very aware of not overwhelming myself not committing to something in saying I must do a video everything away. If I can't do it, it's ok, the worse still gonna go on. You know I've I've, given my given a lot of my own energy and a lot of my time to create and content. If I'm not always able to do that, So fine- and I know that everyone who supports man, all my followers are so Orson. They want me to make sure I'm looking after myself, but I do have a videos on there, a lot of self ca videos on video that a lot of people like watching us to actually story. Actually sorry, I've got my TED talk. Again that was on my vision, both for years and I started really using peer causative

She paused at work that way or Jan affirmation that the and also positive mental attitude that money, thereby giving. That also say that I think my I'd like to do a territorial into buying. It turns out, like switch that everybody right now, whatever you you got truly want it, though, like doubled, the south, like you know, you couples yourself at the end of the day, does it that happens. So we really honest: if you really think that you are going to close Kilimanjaro start saying it I'm going to you know if you're gonna quit your job and become Europe do it say it and I think you got hold accountability for yourself, I think it's great, sharing it with friends who are also going to support and believe you start hunting them as well: a negative supporting their goodnight, hell, yeah Kuwait. What you TED talk, you know, what's gonna happen, I'm so sorry,

to doing that and sure enough and the most beautiful reason I got the opportunity to do a TED talk was that they, professor of the universe, to organise these in Nevada, His daughter is apparently like a fan. She is someone who was inspired by me and he said to her tat. She was only twenty. She said to adapt. This girl needs to have a TED talk, TAT, please make it happen, and so, when I heard that was the reason he was getting in touch with me as I am down, this is exactly what I hope the opportunity would be. I wasn't rushing it. I wasn't pushing it organically kind of came to be for the exactly the right reasons and that you know there was no feeling the not so definitely check out my TED talk. It's very much. The theme is not chasing perfection and again that can relate to certain people in so many different ways.

Perfect, you know being deposit friend. There are so many levels to perfection. The we ve held ourselves to all that we ve seen in films and movies and magazines, and it's not real and to hold yourself too. That is just super damaging and you just don't need to give yourself a break you deserve to, like you know, just been ok, you just don't need to like give yourself a break. You know you deserve to, like you know, just been ok, Sundays, be one hundred percent. Other days be seen my absolute crap as well like you just deserve to just be feeling and validated for exactly how you are in this moment, and so my tattoo again, I think JANET was just the permission to be yourself so. That is hopefully something that you can all watch and I hope you enjoy am I have another video where I stripped down to my where slush swimwear, only New York Subway didn't

and it's amazing Generally. Mountains are priceless Maya prettiest back now. What was I wanted to challenge myself? I was like I talk about confidence. I talk about being constable in this body. I'm gonna put myself in the most terrifying position that I could large impossible and prove that I'm about what I say I'm about, and then it was should the day after the election, and I think a lot of us, was a verified up and wanted to be vocal, and so I wanted to create a piece of content. That was also the standpoint from me. It will be a memory for me of how I felt that day and just put something positive out so that everyone on the subway, no matter how they were feeling, because I mean the whole of new, see cried. I think that day it was very overwhelming. So let's turn create something positive from that and

really fair, like females. Have all my goodness this last year. Was me too, and look where we are this year saw much positive changes happened. It's fantastic and I couldn't be more proud to be a female right now and to see everyone standing up being vocal amusing, their voices ass as such good and to help each other. So yet, and then the final video is one about posing. I've been wanting to do that for the longest time and it was tricky, and I still feel like some people have interpreted it. The way I didn't feel wanted it to be interpreted, because I was trying to say I'm a model I How to pose I've been doing. Some settings the thing is, I'm going to show you the tricks and the things people are doing to change the way that body looks on line, especially on Instagram. There is definitely a whole range of tricks, the satin, to make you that Malta, because

in right now you know the air, if it's not so, Jerry, the people, a kind of talking about it's, it's just the body shapes and having these unreal take measurements and whatever else it might be, you know there's a lot of pressure right now to look like you know that was most famous family. I hear a lot of young people talking about that and I just wanted to show them. As I look at this pose, it makes my bonnet bigger. It makes my hits the cover this pause can make look. I've got a sigh got or just making my on my desk amendment on half the size I just wanted to reveal all of them things that I knew, and I wondered: does everyone else? No this or is it just because I've been muddling this longo that I can see it? When I look at Instagram, I can see that you know everything looks marks out your rights because of the posing that doing and so you I wanted to creativity around that. I think any time did you feel, like I don't know,

people know this. Oh, I think I should shatters. You should go for it. That's how I feel, even if people might interpret it wrong, they're gonna be a bunch of people who are gonna, be thankful for it and learn something from it, and I think that's really a wonderful chance. We haven't social media is to share and educate and inspire and connect, and all these other wonderful things are never lose time should that never lose touch of what you can bring to the table, because at the end of the day, only you you only you have your thoughts on you have your talents and passions and passed now see so there's always something you can bring to the table. Thank you so much for coming on. I have been so excited to have you on and oh my gosh, I'm already taxing. My team saying this episode is amazed hating. When can we put it out there? So just thank you for showing up, just as you always do in such a way that just really inspires everyone who gets to hear from you

you kidding me John. I thank you for allowing us to have this platform to share. And I saw as well how many women are so inspired- women, women and men. Everyone is so inspired by what you doing and yet giving people that space giving them mean. Wherever they are their able to listen to us. How beautiful is that an thank you thank you. I just coming you enough and- I'm I'm so excited that you're, a real role model and couldn't ass were a better advocate. The sick man, empowerment, teaching, the one so many things and sang positive and allowing people to be themselves every step of the way I'm so yeah. I'm excited learn more from you as well. I think that huge thing. I'm grateful! I get to soar everyone. I know you got no genuine progress. And I ve gotten to learn so much from her already, and I hope to continue to do that. So sending you up

of love girl. I know everyone wants to check out the campaign that escrow is talking about, that we are both a part of just had to area dot com. You are going to be is blown away by the beauty that you see and how were really challenging that definition of beauty in the most incredible way and so check out airy dot com in until next time. Gold diggers keep on digging your biggest skulls I mean it's impossible to some this woman, I just wanted to hang on the line for so long because escrow really. Invite people to just come alive and when ever I'm with her. I'm always just so encouraged by what she has to say, like she has not been afraid to step into the truth and to all the things that make Awesome in to tell the world yes, when its telling her no I just think that we need more of that thing. We have become too shy to timid

You deterred by the word no, and we have to continue to step into that truth to really honour the calling that we ve been given. Now some my favorite things, escrow that she was told she was too much or too little and cheese still sad and believed and owned the fact that she could create your own way that a lot of times we just look at other people and instead of seeing there success as a reflection of what our potential is. We try to fight low in their path, but I heard his quote ones- and I love it in its if the path is well paved in while let it's probably not your path, and so I hope today hearing escrow story and just the way that she stepped into her own truth and encouraged thousands and millions and Hutton of people along the way man really should show you that, whether you have one follower or a million followers, you have this platform and you have a voice and the thing.

It covers showing for us in really big ways. I am so proud to be working alongside of you sister and I can not wait to see what is next until same gold. Diggers, keep on digging your biggest cause, were listening to the gold digger podcast die into the show notes for this episode and all past episodes at W W W dad gold, digger, podcast, dot com,