Work on the Notice board s number five thirty to come and see me in Portland June, twelve of the fourteenth. That's this week, go to helium comedy dotcom, Slash Portland for tickets and info. Also at midnight is back this week with a pretty fantastic, lineup, Steve Ages on tonight, the Monday night, and I adore him to pieces. There is a lot of pieces because he's a tall man, so that's a lot of adoration that I have received eighty, that that midnight midnight after the Corbett report gravity Sandro disturbances brought you buy Harry's dotcom. Basically, you gonna get pipeline shaving implements shipped right to your door. These are financed, waves are engineer in their own factory. In Germany they have an incredible amount of sharpness, an incredible amount of strengthening. Get a smooth shave at half the price, the competitors there. She bought the ninety three old german factory that makes the blade so that they can really control the process and deliver the best product kit sort of fifteen dollars which get you a handle freely.

Shape cream ship right to your door Bell even to accustom engraving option for you. If you want your initials on the razor, maybe your shave it's in the morning like way. What's my initials again, this is it or at least you know that no one else will touch your razor unless they also have your initials. That's that's something that you're gonna have to work out, though. Just keep people who have your initials away from your and your bathroom and you're shaving whence and it all and then you'll be fine right now, of course, there's a promo code, all right, it's the noticed. All one word all lowercase. When you go to Harry Stock. I'm gonna throw in a free for packet blades with your first purchase again, it's Harry's dot com used a promo code the Nerdist all one word all lowercase, but it free for pack of blades with your first order. This episode of the podcast is Brian Bishop and if you know the Carolla podcast of all Brian has Morgan without him. For years he throw his book shrinkage what's available now on Amazon Weber, books are sold. Also, his podcast of the film vault is out every Friday Bryan,

pretty incredible guy, if you mean, are you probably be? You are probably familiar with brine? Maybe you would you enormous ball, Brian, but but Brian had about with cancer, and he survived it, and- and so we talk a lot about about- you know what it takes to survive. Something of that magnitude literally the worst thing that could happen to a person that they would have to go through. Brian went through. He came out the other side and he wrote a book about it, but I M here: really sweet, I really inspirational and jam- and this was this- was this- was a little bit deeper than than some of the typical ones are. We have on the notice, so I was very fortunate to be passive Brian and have one ensure the story. So here we go the nurse by gas. There were five thirty, two with brine bitch. Now entering ain't doing nearest com

new to the medium, but done very intrigued by what the possibilities are with the country might already limited. I wouldn't even try to get on borders rather said now: yeah thanks renewal, rigour. Are you are you good night? considering why'd. You know something I don't know hooker non very good, I'm really good and thank you for asking I'm good, I'm gonna emotional place when the physical play. I'm recovering, you know all sort of always be recovery. But I feel that I feel really good symptoms and thanks are going well off,

If you dont know Brian, I first met working on Corollas radio show yeah, which then became a podcast show. What did you come into promote back? It was at the book or what? What were you re before, that it was over the my book thinking? that two thousand eleven our all started doing the pod cats. He Corolla got fired We did the radio's your meals, you two thousand, I sixty nine. Yet it was mid, two thousand nine, because been doing the podcast for a little while before we started ours and we started at the beginning of two thousand ten, so was I promoting at the time in two thousand and nine it would have been designated as nine. It would have been easy for possibly web soup. Might have been from about that taught as arising nine and and then and then fuck you for

a brain tumor. How dare I accept our responsibility there? You do that society? How dare you do that all started dropped that on the YAP Adam I mean this. Is this has been going this happening you, like was as two years ago without I know, you're, wednesdays with the five year inverse was divers was right off the radio show in the air and the timelines of everyone's millet time really does put right. That's right because it I remember curly telling a story about how he found out. While he was working on the sit come he was. Do his first compiler receive yes and which I was was to be working here halls the onward tell him I'm not going to work on Monday yeah. That was, how I told item then a whole chapter about the guy. I told you I'm not going to work on the day because I have a deadly deadly brain to my God and he said that he he just sort of crumbled. At that point he was not that he here he plays most of the vast, but you know I understand they took a pretty hard. Obviously emu, someone who worked with him

long time an event, if we're being honest, he's really the victim in the story. Here, that's what I'm trying to say. We are not clear. No, I mean you perpetrated a heinous crime against that Quite frankly, everyone I do feel I selfishly getting a brain tumor. I think the reason we go this way. Can we start with another? This is starting now, I've just call it like it is America can handle. You really do. Have the task of the earth of questions, we gotta stop these dubious as we go, you guys we're going to stop these duties in their drags from taking too hard king tumor jobs away from I make jokes, as I am the concept I will first of all because you're funny in you, I would, if I would assume that comedy is something for you that has been helpful. I've avoided it most of my life, where it says to help us to avoid a comedy. Anything can neither can even remotely funnier do invest, did starve it, but but I make jokes about it because it from me

facing my mortality standpoint. It is one of the most horrifying things that you could conceive of. I mean it's it's bizarre. I mean there's no worse, there's really aside from like you, some as you know, has died. There is really no one news. You can get one, even I don't want to. I will pay and so at the time we just been laid off or the show just flat formats and the show was off the air, my wife or fiance the Taos engaged at the time and so engage are laid off and she was laid off too. So two people are on the age of thirty laid off and engage Jesus Christ. Of happiness. Oh my god, I was pretty heavy, so when I was diagnosed I was given a mean. I asked the doktor. Could you get me a lot of medical mumbo jumbo? I bid shuffled around from doktor doktor. At this point I was like cut to the chase us like doc. We look and realistically what's what can happen these, like? Typically in these cases, I say

Six months to a year, oh my god, I'm out feels like sitting next to me, she's hysterical and my first thought was holy shit and then my next thought another of its was naive if it was. Denial or whatever my next thought was well. That's not gonna, be me, and I don't know that, they made them even stupid, or his head in the sand or whatever. But I was like, will we'll figure something out will fight? That's what I'm not gonna go quite easily. Oh, my god. And so it did you did it settled. I mean you're breaking bed now. But when he's diagnosis unfamiliar with the concept of Lithuania, when he's diagnose initially he just doesn't it just he's completely. Unfazed, ok and the doktor Can you understand what I'm saying goes? Yea I gotta cancer. Ok and I was marginally phased out the phased. I was faced degree by If seriously, or was there a part of you that still was there a layer of separation between

the reality of what you just been told and just trying to pay. Since the information? It's a great questioner, it it me you. I mean I got a cold sweat. I now know what people mean when this area got a cold. Sweat like I was spending, but I was freezing and I was like holy shit, but that was like getting married him all the to be two months and a good could be gone his little a six months, but then it like right away. Maybe was just my brain, pressing the endorphins to say The enzyme to say gonna be ok, but I really just thought because that point all the invitations have been set out selected. What they won't we'd hired. The photographer was that so expenses Van Soviets relations have to cancel on that stuff pulls out a bachelor party coming up in mind than unlocking cancer. Did you go under very lucky? I wanna fuck. You know about your body ass, my doctors. What do normally for this bachelor party in their alike

this should have been assigned at all is lost without doing every want, none other than their hatred. Don't get you haven't been That's exactly what everyone area was the worst, the better they were like. Don't you can drink but don't get too drunk stay out of a sign, an ongoing LAS Vegas by the way to extend the sign in lay- and as I know, is he and theirs it there's a chapter in the book called my Bachelor party or that I took chemo industry Club Jesus, is that true, there's a hunter was entering the GMO Industry Club. I honestly wonderful Ike These words are in there. I can't be the first guy to take came on a strip. Do you think it ever happen before? No? Well, I don't know and vague maybe maybe anything happens, beggars gets read my book now exactly that unbelievable. No, I I was on a night came a regiment of that point. Like a chemo pillow, you know every night at its very chemo I went to this.

I came to the king S, room and Meda came all over the place God. So, when you're, what so described the set up, I really want to mean, and again just people. This a people know we're talking about your book. Is culture judge manhood marriage in the tumor that tried to kill me. Then I love the court on the front from camel Brok and puts the cannon cancer can be broken. But what have you look? You know how it is a blurbs. You ask people rival wherever Kimmel wrote back in four minutes and it was like. Well, that's that's perfect, as exact what I was hoping for. I am. I am so thrilled that you, the first of all that you survived and let you have obviously that you went on to right up to write a book about it, because it's important I for me, to understand its important for people to know, particularly those who by their just gotten this news or who know someone near gotten this news that aid that there is that their and we hope and b that damn you know it's on. Orton too. We, I think we think of all this morning,

already stuff. Is such big picture ticket items that it's that we can't really understand it on you and on his aim in Lebanon and important for someone to come along and human eyes it and, and at least give people some point of reference for four, what's going on what they can expect, how they can deal with it, how you dealt with its yeah. I appreciate that in by the way no one's happier than meat I survived, but I peppered the book. I want a tumor temps like like the french francs. Tips on how to get to monitor how to terrible idea. It's really one step process. The first step is, admittedly, the hardest. Its tips on what happened, what practice so we should do if you find yourself in a situation like this, not even necessarily cancer, but if you have some major in our illness or condition or your loved one, does your mama, your dad or your wife, her husband or whatever, so at the very least, helpless impractical sovereignty?

and take away from what it was like. What's an example of a bit of a tip well like, for example, when I was an earlier, those can shoulder shuttled around from one doktor to another. It became. Hard to remember day ascribe my my funds for this guy ready or what symptoms or where was I in the timeline with their swords? This guy have my scan. So have ever and down. If you have to wonder if you have to send it along ahead of yours like at times the doktor can see your time. Let us symptoms are see who you ve talked to or because they have to do from other doctors and in saying oh yeah, I saw a doctor Jones Santa Monica saw doktor bubble. Ah here you can gather office, and yet there is going to take a day to do that. Send ahead of time and always get like hard copy of the disk of whatever scans you get, because that's yours, that's your property in and you can get a copy of the desk and bring it to the doktor with you Orson that had a time. So, let's

Let's talk about Chemo Strip Club yeah. How did that? How did that work- and I would I would guess at the strippers- were completely on tolerable on phase. They were probably unfazed. Their reaction surprised me. So what happened was I'm on a nightly chemo regiment, I'm I'm taking my chemo pills every night at the same time, ten p m, and there really serious about that. For some reason I think is because your body takes came essentially poison. You're right. It takes a while to filter it through and filtering out so you're you're you're, basically trying poison yourself a system enough to kill the tumor about not. We are basically just take. Self edge of half in hope, met? You survive the rigours of the came over here TAT S, not so you're, basically saying that a key year, basely saving the tumor, how you like some of that try this fucker ten year, but process your shredding, your body and, generally you open. The chemo kills something

Is that not all of the things? So here I am in the ship club, my friends, you have been a good time because they want to date no, I was your me, am I not diagnosed for a month now and that they want to have a normal time. Obviously there there they want to have. They want me to have a normal time. They went abnormal time so we're all doing their normal thing. The trip club and I'm sitting on the subtle velvet couch and at ten o clock rules around. That's take my pills and I put them all clamshell things they wouldn't burst inside my pocket. Pull it out, and there is, I mean from the bonus I should act. Would in that and there's a lady. So I don't know if we ve all been. Sure club here. But what happens is clear and strict club. I actually have talked about this a lot, I dont like strip clubs and other do I, but I went over the new years. I was at a group of people in LAS Vegas. Actually, with my girlfriend and and we We all went to one and the girl, sometimes like it better Chloe, definitely a better than I do. We right

I guess so I don't know I mean I'm just I'm not like a word tidies kind of guy, like I just drop, you know but Chloe is kind of a world tidies kind of so we did so we didn't go and it is you know it is a little bit awkward. I do find that some of the stripper have amazing improv skills because they, Oh there's everybody yourselves them instantly sit down and talk and start digging around, information and try to connect few. I was so blown away by how how much yes ending. I was like where these things really really good Imp Improv hours. There are the best sales women I probably ever met because they will sit down and you'll be gone with a hundred dollars within an hour. So you so you had the clamshell gas can. One of the girls had sat next to me is that they do they sidewalk next day or the saddle next year when they start to. Conversation or whatever might hold on a second. I've got something to do a pull out my pill and put on my. And she goes- who do what he got there. They can. It's like.

This is something I dared not like. The opposite like this is. This is nothing you want. This is not, and I take it whether vodka rebel O Hake, did you tell her what I want? I don't want to say that I have the cure for cancer slot I've a cure for cancer, So you think about your red balls with a keyboard J, J, J, silly chemo with about a rebel couldn't have heard still here. I think you're lucky, looking at all the steps. Now, that's right, social, she got none of it came up eventually, averted came up. Did you did you tell her now that's not really light, conversely, that was a medication, I think, as I just the medication yeah? I know you disappointed that it wasn't a hallucinogenic drug problem. I want I you know at that point you could have seen

how far you could push with that to see, she would still be able to climb and give a laptop or you know what you you couldn't some kind of a discount, don't you feel like theirs? I really good point simply: count, yeah Africa, twenty percent opportunities, all Toby's this, my the Borgo POGO Lufthansa's. So did still manage to have Abe River I mean I'm trying to understand your emotional state and how a person deals with something of this magnitude. Particularly when you're personalizing, it's good, that you had. This is a distraction, I'm guessing from the wedding mean or from the wedding in the Bachelor Party as a distract from just going? What the fuck am? I gonna die like another, you know, and so yes, where you kind of John back in and out of, like gay bachelor cancer yea. A party who it was more. I never really

terribly concerned with the grand The scale of at all, like the oh, I might die, was more yea severity of shit. I gotta because keep might as so, worst of my illness. I was using a Walker full time might for about three months. Maybe six months I was in a wheel for a short period of time I mean I lost. The use of my left side was fucked up. How did you use them because of my tumors in my brain stem and a hit my cranial nerves and controls everything from breathing to move on your left society or facial everything? So I was wearing my Really badly much worse than I am now are you actually that slurring at all? I thank you, but Compare the where I was I'm. Ninety five percent recovered as people who know me well, can probably pick up on that five percent, like the last five pounds of a diet losing last five pounds, is really hard getting that last night sent back to where I was next to impossible, amendments a permanent damage, but but my point is at the time

I was on the down slope of all of this. I was soon to be using a Walker full time and I was soon to be in the wheelchair, and I was crazy. If you answer, was my full time, caregiver round the clock, twenty four hours she had to help me get to the bathroom I mean I was pretty fucked up and so before. I got really bad on launched on the down slope. It about down the eye like physically making it down the aisle, I'm worried about dance at my what I'm worried about the by other honeymoon, because we're going to Hawaii and is the beach pools and ends. Will we put our ticket a year at a time, and so I'm I'm worried. Not the greatness of it all the grand scale, life or death stuff. A word about the nuts and bolts practical stuff of speaking admire sold dinner in like stuff. Like that, I didn't it was also over How do you do something kick in

Are you always kind of because it seems like just to hear you talk for a few minutes that you're pretty much a wireless figure? They should our kind of again were you always that way here I think I am that's. That's the thing I, like least about talking about the whole thing is because it's so much easier said than done. The like else have a great attitude now Sonny, which helps to have a positive outlook in all livestock, because that's how I am, I have a positive outlook and I'm a pretty glass half full. A guy and its probably annoying to hear that coming from someone like that, if you're the opposite, if you're, just someone who is prone to being for easily and is so much easier said than done, and people I owe you intervene. If can't you gotta have a the right attitude. It sucks, but I know bill had the right attitude who died, who didn't make it it sucks. The worst thing ever tell their families are friends o with. If you have the right attitude, you're gonna make it. I don't think it's true, but it doesn't hurt

I think it's one of those things that have to have if you're gonna make it we're gonna be cancer. Well, I think it's. It's not funny man, no, no! No, this doesn't have to be financially. We can drift in and out of Greek and drift in and out about. It knows no problem, but I think this is. I think it's important. I think it's important talk about it and try to understand, because just big big life being life, you know chances are. We are all touched by. Something of this magnitude at some time or another everything else. First, tourism or someone else, yes eminent recital, no I've talked to aside interrupt me name as it the saint they made the two of them or their loved one or apparent or public a friend. At some point, maybe it's going to be in your life. Well, I think the attitude part. You know whether or not it helps it probably doesn't hurt, and then I would assume again being you know, lucky enough to not have and through something like this. I would assume that you know if you

you have a handful of months left to live with rather be miserable, those last few months, or at least try to find some some you know some I'll pick out the cook you two out of the ice just set about islamic something I mean it, but I don't know it's tough for me to say, because you know you can't say until you there now and even here there I was radiated non chemo for a lot of this. So I don't have. I I remember everything, but a lot of my super vivid memories. Just aren't there, because I don't have supersaver recollections of thinking this this time or thinking this at this time, and luckily I had the benefit of being radiated. Not remembering did just one of those things where they just go. Where there's just no real idea of how this happened

Well just happen sometimes did did they. They told me that a lot of times it is called a Rugeley alma brains, timidly amok as in the legal cells in the brain and which around the brain stem, and they said that a bit a lot of these are juvenile tumors, a maid had ever made out of decades. Kid and any just gonna sat there and it starts growing or moving. That's when you feel symptoms, that's with Sars to mess you up. Jesus so I could have been, is probably caused by nothing people I'd, love to ascribe meaning to things that have no meaning. You know like. Oh, you must have dinner. Paralyzer must have been the water or must have been there, and that now I grow the suburbs and burying NOME with is as normal that area as possible and no family. Here you speak of out and out of the ordinary anyway and smallness things, men, and so what? How long did the process How long did you go through chemo and radiation and recovery in, and so what what are some of the highlights sure

time line the highlights that are diagnosed in late ape all of two thousand nine and then within a week or two, I would ask our came on radiation now, my tumors in so no surgery possible. So can radiation can all they can do because to just two like scenario exacerbating around us exactly right, it's it's it as they, as my doctor is described to me, is the Beverly hills of real estate in the in the in the brain, just us for Jews This was going to say so So it's cooperate so keen on radiation and I did six weeks of cologne radiation. It caused as usual and out of the swelling in my ran ass, my doctor described to me after the fact and air brain where it is like a funnel that you know sent everything to the rest of your body. It states the brain stem. My swelling with so bad that sort of cut off a lot of my vital prefer

winces like using my entire left side and talking right and blinking out a sequence like my those looking at us who can switch freaked out my fiance but then, after the six weeks we got married when our honeymoon you someone on the honeymoon, I will not refundable tickets and fuller juice, yeah, so We did on him of debts when things start to really get bad. My brother got married a month after I did and we traveled up north for his wedding and by that point I I could barely I d be helped up and down. I was one of the rooms men, I d be helped up and down the aisle for his wedding. I couldn't Dan. His wedding, we left early and, and things got really bad. I was on my Walker full time, I I say by Walker, but it was my wife's grand parents, Walker and they did not any more so it's kind of weird borrow one from the grandparents who no longer need the Walker and on the grand kid, and I borrowed so preyed on it anymore.

Don't you anymore than luckily neither of us dead, but I use that for three or four months. Things got progressively worse swelling, got worse. My brain and at a certain point at a certain point, decisions were made one I needed to go into the hospital to do impatient physical therapy, and I must ask authority, as you got a therapist you work out for an hour. You go home. Therein admit me to the hospital for a week, because the point where I couldn't be. I was following all the time like an old person would fall and I couldn't get up, and so Christie would have to be Around me, at all times, if I was on my feet and she could s an incredible for a thirty year old woman, and so she was like you have to we gotta get you like some real therapy, and read around that time. They they put me on a new drug relative they'll be new, been on the market for a year or two the vast and ends, as it turns out We're gonna have asked in about a third of em. Don't respond, unfortunately, about third of em

respond marginally while about third are super risks. They will respond really really well and I block they fall into that top category and As my I interviewed my doctor for the book, and I was like you know what we know is like the explained that had the vast and not worked like it did you wouldn't be having this conversation today, within reactor here. Out of yeah you had remained at that point. It is also what the hell are. We, You guys, together before this before you found out, mean and were together for cheese before I found out about about two years about two years, successful your tears and a relationship in the mean. What an amazing woman she's I mean she's, these started what an amazing I mean because Obviously you know as much as sucks too and sucks being an understatement as much as it sucks.

Go through something like that on a first person level, but when you love someone and to watch that happen and still be able to have the strength to to there is a pick that person up and carried him to the bathroom and get them. You know. I mean I mean that's when she sounds pretty remark, she's the best personnel tissues remarkable ends, you know what I think I remember she would tell me she told me in retrospect years later that you know people one person or more than breathing of one person after his death both were engaged in the end there like. Are you gonna, stay with them or even go through the whole thing? and she is. I could never enter my mind not to and its power how can I ever hope for anything better to come across? when you were doing the vows and I got to at present in a coma already. There

hopefully the hell of his eyes around the corner behind her her uncle. The air with the efficient at the ceremony. Maroni said that is very emotional. Will you then how do you How do you it's crazy stars many questions in terms of you know It's going to this event. He up this wedding and they know that it might might just be a symbolic morass. You know people I did it, I was a nice wedding. I think, was fantastic opposition by us, but tat people describe it emotional. For obvious reasons. You know I was very sick, very sick. At the time helps back down the I'm in costs where, as outdoor thing Napa and it was up a couple steps onto a little like an old risen kind of whenever pavilion kind of thing and to get back down those two steps I had to be helped. Back down the stairs Jesus. It's crazy! If it

he puts things into perspective, say something funny gas turbines I mean really. You know I just one What are you? What are you saying each other every night when you're in bed in what are you? What what because you're normal conversation. At that point, do you do you makes I'll talk to you. Talk about stupid things. You go! Look. You know that this person did then creating on the internet? Are all this movie looks it or are you having those conversations are as everything well of you, you thought on what you just said number one. You know Christie really bore the brunt all this, because, as I sort of lost the ability speak cohesively. I she could kind of understand by my slurring. My mumbling, but I wasn't speaking so coherently size? It wasn't talking a lot because number one. I felt self conscious number two. I was tired. I was sleeping eighteen hours at a certain point, and so here she is

newly married taking care of her new husband, whose dying round the clock- and she doesn't want to talk to you one. Guy she's around all the time doesn't really talk that much. So how did she do it. I mean in her: aren't you Don T have tat, can get her here, We have to see friends and family in and just grab teeth and got through it and it sucks, and it took a long to sort of she was admitted to hospital to during that time for Collide S like with like politeness, I get to implement at the end of the year, the gastro intestinal area Aaron. She, she suffered opportunities anyway, so definitely under way into Heaven whenever, whenever, whatever that time comes what were you owe her spiritual, religious purse? before, or did you become more you not like? What's where it? Where do you fall in that

I mean I'm open minded em up mind anything out whatever up being the truth, and that being the case, I probably won't be surprised by like if there is a bearded man in the sky like right, there's just dirt at the end of life, now right so I embraced do you like guided meditation because just give it a shot, if that helps and helped a lot of really help me sort of center myself and think about what was going on in the larger picture and put things in perspective and sort of just quiet my mind and put things because every day was a new series of events, ice or put Thea put the days. Events Vienna plays in my mind, the made sense: when did you feel normal and did that concept of normal change? I mean, did you you ever feel normal. That's why the biggest things a whole people take away from the book if if they are in a situation like this is recovery

recovery Quantum quote, is in it's so So's, tiny and sell incremental that you, I would way every day and really want to be better. I'd want to feel better That is the gonna feel better. Now the damage to feel better shit not until you're down the road three four months. They you look back and you like I remember when I couldn't do that. I can do that again, so you don't see it recovery and you'll feel it. But you see it when you look back three or four months and mired by The people in my situation, which I wish all told me, is don't lose faith. It's it's gets better, It's so small. You don't notice it and you want Does it after a week or maybe even two weeks, but after a month or two or three years heart disease, differences things you couldn't do before like arguing example, I added at a daily, a regiment of sixty eight pills and in order to sort you somehow

therapy. I would lay lean back on my couch and put the pills on my stomach. I put a poor em out on my shirt and I would take left hand, which was now pretty much useless, and I will attempt to get each pill in my mouth, but I had such a hard time even getting my hand up. Air and then pinching it and then getting up to my mouth I would drop it took at one point as long as forty minutes just take my sixty eight pills and ass a really really really frustrating thing when you can't give yourself a pill with your left hand, but then eventually I was able to do it and if I had been able to tell myself, we optimize often the shoulders, a don't get frustrated and if you ma This will be a ok, but there's no way to be audited. Unfortunately commands you an awful question. No, fuck. The Argo heads was there is there anything funny about any of it like when it was happening. You were like Jesus Christ I mean like,

funny and well I did run a fuckin book shrinkage, boner, joke and decide on, but I was there any Was there any part of it where, it was so awful that you had to laugh at something or something that you felt like as the process, so destructive was like this kind of funny that that that this thing is this work is here because you're basically endure you're swimming in deep waters and most people will you know it's the world does not understand, will not be there. So what were? They think that How do you like? That's weird, I never thought cancer would be like this. There is a number of those anecdotes in the book of one there's, a chapter called the time, my wife, drugged, Munich, Interpol and Maui. What I think answer requested question from earlier and answer this question all once the things that we did talk about

and the like. What are you guys say to each other when you know you're alone or whatever, and the thing that I would say the Christine again This is another example of maybe me being naive, maybe me being in denial, but would say to her when things get really bad, I would say: I'm gonna get better and I may just been trying to make her feel better. I may have just been trying to make her not be also shitty situation, but I be like I'm getting a better Don't worry, I'm gonna get better and one point as a chop. Called my my migration rats. I list my grayish regrets because a certain point, my life, I'm taking inventory of of my life and what I've done and migration regrets includes my number two time: branch regret, which is I'm putting myself two times while on chemo and Misty, the saint that she is clean me up and took of everything and we're locked

about it and shoes laughing, and am very embarrassed because I'm a grown man, thirty years old and I've just soiled myself since that entire, like it's like a second time in a month s I know, but under the circumstances under this, it's not like you, you know where to start. The regular guy, my job and my group's lawyer that pants foolish. It wasn't really yeah, but in time I don't love every chemo or every cancer patients like this, but I had come, to a lot out and was analysed or descending list clung to a list of things like this, bad, but at least I haven't blank, and one of the blanks was pooped myself. What happened? cross not off the list. So as she's cleaning me up and throwing away ruined pair of underwear and putting me in the shower and housing me down, I tat. Her and said is clear, as I could. I said: I'm gonna get better comical on a situation to be like. You can't get much worse,

you better, get that another why this is going in the right direction, but boiler alert, I did get words haven't even man, and I read a book here now, I'm sorry I have never yet all serious boiler yeah. So that was our little running. You know time. I'm gonna get better and were their times where you thought Well, this is it I'm dying or like I'm gonna die or like are you you know? Did you did you ever like. Oh, I see a lighter, I don't know or order. The entire time did reuse like no promoting better. I never thought that the closest ever came to because ever came to that was it's the most probably partly because when I got the result from the MRI that told us basically whether the came on the radiation, it worked, it was at First MRI after radiation. There was like ok, I'm, let's you this whole thing worked if it hadn't worked, it was

maybe a short time after that that be now the lights out ever have worked, them were moving in the right direction and things are working and we can keep doing this and I'm still so fucked up from radiation chemo that I can't physically. I can't tell her I'm ill because and you can tell the doktor explained if anything happens, of your tumor you'll be the first to cuz, it's so small, and it such a tight area back there that if a grocer shrink, the tiny bit you'll feel something different. And I was feeling anything different at the time. So I was very, very nervous is the most nervous had ever been was going into their doctors, that day and see. Result the MRI and my wife was there and my mom was there she flew down from northern California and it was it was as much a moment of truth is any of us? Probably ever you now ever ever feel it was crazy, crazy experience where I was like this is going to. My this is my past

live or my my death sentence in a wax craves, a crazy, dramatic mine and then everything not on debt or what Weiler, Keyser real to sitting in here. You see him to write ah now I was gonna: go the streets homer the time shrunk by about half, which was Hugh to a very, very, very pleased that so When did you start at what point in this know? All this did you go, came, go back to work on a start living GEO. Normally again, I can start living normally again I mean what what for some of the things that you started, doing the right away right away. What Adam on your member this but cruel us spearheaded a huge fundraiser for me. I remember it was awesome. It was. It was incredibly flattering: the people showed up both as the performers and the fans and we raise the tunnel money

on that? I was in no shape to work at this point and Christie. Still my fault, I'm just so got the nice. Mri doesn't mean that I was in the clear like. I was still needing round the clock care for months after that, and that money got us through the next year of our lives, it was, they said. We lived off it and The first thing we did with the money was we went to this very intense we long, physical therapy down San Diego this world, renowned, physical therapist and he for a week, gave me full day p. These actions and face? They got me back a mountain, no pun intended. Gummy back on my feet- and I started again this time with the help and not of a Walker but with a brace- and I just got back to the this of living a day to day life in things start to get a little better. My speech article clear and ride around this time this when Corolla started to go from the member here in front of a one on one podcast out of his basement or whenever evident IRAN has garage to heed bided Teresa straw,

back and invited me back- is like how to put the shell back together. I want to make it more of a show, and I was just going to recover the point where Dr again, and I could talk semi coherently and those like this is this is perfect timing for now I am, I meant to be heading this point. Recovery as as, as I'm doing it, so that was that was the big mile. For me was because my speech was so fucked up at one point that I was like well, my career and broadcasting is over Obviously it got back some I'm thrilled him So in terms of the day? ever consider you know, is sometimes your stories, like, oh dear, that person went down to me ago, or you know, got all this time Well, that's not allowed here because of the FDA, and you know like through you. I guess you know what western medicine verses, alternative medicine right or did you did you explore

thing along those lines. Not I did. I did the I did the guided meditation. I did some hypnotherapy, among other all the sort of transcendental stuff because it just as I think do you have to have at least a good attitude to pay? Often the re from lined yours after spiritually, put yourself in the right. Never mind. I mean you have to be firing, I'll cylinders sky. What I'm trying to say For me, I needed be firing on that sort of spiritual, emotional selinger. So I did that, but it turns out full medicine. No, I really had a lot of faith in our doctors and obviously paid off, but now it never got to that point where I consider going overseas her whenever there I ve not opposed to it is never never thought of it. Did you have insurance to cover this at the time? So I was I I don't even know why I did it, but I signed up for cobra when this radio show ended in February, and so this is April, on cholera, the continuing healthcare coverage- and this is

two thousand isomer about economy was Obama was signing in a bunch of extensions into the law for cobra, whereas previously was like six months, ended up being like eighteen months We appeal real godsend for me that I can keep my insurance, so my guy granted a cost two hundred dollars rate in her dollars a month, but I'm getting fifty thousand dollar radiation sessions every day, so right I mean: do you know what a bankrupt me in less than a week, we'll Sherman you, you know you You go if you go and read it and you see people with no insurance or like I had to go into the emergency room because I broke my toe and then I was twenty five thousand now like these. Crazy, crazy, crazy numbers how insane absurd made up. You know bugs bunny numbers unaware Does my my go to four things? Don't make sense so when, at what point feel like you are ready to start We were you when you are going through this real, like I should

keep a raw diary of this, or I should write a book or I should do this at what point did you think I need didst? I need to get the story out. I had I wonder when an agent track me down in cities write a book ass really when I started this great book now Christie, my wife kept a great blog at the time. The whole idea behind the blood was to keep Our family members like out of the area in the loop and people are friends, family up, north and northern California. Just people who wanted to follow our story, but we call everyone every danger here, so we did today and so should start blog to give an updated and it took on a life of its own, because promoting on the pie cast because I went on ounce to my my brain tumor, a few maybe a week after happened after I was diagnosed, and people from all around the world sorted volumes blocked because their fans, the show or their fans of Adam Army or or whatever, and they wanted to was going online, so that ended up.

Really invaluable resource, because, as I'm going back in writing this book, I'm researching its and how did it? What what order this that these things happen in Bob and Christy's Daily Blog ended up being the road map for the book. So when you look back at that time, your life. How do you categorize it in Europe, do flat out think: oh, that's the darkest period of anything or do you see How do you and vision it when you're tons of fun when I was doing guided is owed never ever guided meditation deal. That is I've vs. I've never done it, I'm bad it. Shutting my brain, I interest for more than a like, I'm bad. It shutting me the thoughts outermost because then you start getting into, though Oh wait, I'm thinking right now there is, I think, something up. That's thinking I'm talking to myself. That means I'm thinking. Yes, a friend of mine gave me gotta, meditation city, which

there's a woman on their who guys you through some thoughts in some deep thought. Imitation at one point, its various people have cancer Onek. Ironically enough, in a one point she says I want she's gonna. Think about this thing much your family think about your whenever she goes think about your cancer and thank your tumor, I thank my tumors is like thank it for giving you a new active on life and for making you value what's wrong important and for priority rising I was like. I never right now. I have a and pretty pester my tumor, but I guess in a way I appreciate. Act now. I'm really aware was really important. You know my my family and my fiance and my friends and everything starts it S. Basically, and so I thought about that- and it blew my mind. As I am thanking my tumor and away and and afterwards afterwards being when us recover. It was so nice to be able to worry

the little things again. It was after six. Months or a year of worrying about. Am I going to live or is my beyond? you're going to be a widow at a young age, it was to worry about the mail. Didn't take the letter out of our mailbox. Are you not? I get us stupid you no direct he's down again: oh yeah, it's nice, or rather the little that is pretty frustrating that I'm tv. It was an example one. You know, because it's very hard, it's like other than you gotta, get him on. The phone is sometimes good luck, yeah. They have to escalate to a supervisor and its I get it. I mean it's pretty close to our excellent now young, automated lawyers yelling operator, and how can operate as I'm? Sorry, I don't get it yeah, it's two zero, zero, zero, zero, and so it's nice we're about little things like people are like does what the small stuff like no sweating, the small stuff is pretty fucking great. When you're not gonna worry about it. We're gonna live to see you next birthday. That's an excellent points. In small sums can be great it it's

small step as a gift. My dad always my dad used to say that no time don't what they might have, if they don't want the small stuff and it's all small stuff, but but but that bet but point of view of yet you know too this waters. Room temperature grayer now means you only you your problem, you I mean I always get excited when I go to one of my homepage. Is that gives the Google news page recently, and you know if, if I see a bunch of bullshit stories about, like all they were trying to make up some of the incentive dramatic. I kind of go like slow news days are good good days. I the time when the onion came back after nine. Eleven was what the gonna, do I nine eleven? Can there be an onion after something you know, and there is another couple stories were liked terrorist surprised themselves in hell was one of them, but another one, I think, was something along the lines of you know America longs to give a shit about Amerika longs to I don't know,

only care about stupid shit or something along. We, where you sort of realize they put it in perspective, it's only the new game as as only the union can but but also you know no I'm not I'm definitely someone who who get worked up about dumb, stupid things, and I am aware that, like all the forgery receptions option around it, that I know that there is I'm not dumb. I know that there could be a time where I wish that that's all I had to wouldn't be nice, if that was the only thing that was wrong in your day and when, and so I think it's important for people when you find yourself getting mad at reception Africa or whatever, that you can stop from it and go I'm so fuckin lucky. I'm not so lucky that this is the worst part of my day that this is, you know, even work stuff. Works of seems really important because you're at work and like all we have to make this all, but you have a job and you get paid to show up at its. I think it's I think it's sort of taking

rock of negativity in flipping it over and seeing what's on the other side. Yes, I have a job. Yes, I have a car. Yes, I'm I'm entrapped, because I'm on my way somewhere, yes, I can communicate yes, I can even have the presence of mind to be upset about this fuckin asshole in front of me, who is tat thing and not driving. You know we don't realize about our brain sort of work in a big too small, kind of way when it comes to problems in the fact that we end up at traffic or where d or whatever it is nice that ends up did you get any problem solving techniques. In other words, the experience that you had are you able to apply? Some of the basic principles to anything else in your life. Interesting work I thought about that. What do you like it? Would he give you an example? What I would have felt? I don't know. I just mean you went through something awful, obviously, And you

through your own site, logical make up right if, of the series of problem solving Techniques are ways to deal with. With that which then afterwards It obviously change you, you know they changed you and probably a lot of ways that were strengthening because you ve made it through yeah. So What were some of those techniques? Do you find yourself applying those two non life threatening situations will have never taken came over the stripper again. That's where you live as regards this. Here's here's the here's the best way, I can hear is the best way but I can make an analogy- and it's not it does not allow for that situation. So it's not a great example look at, but I found that through consistent exercise, I learn techniques through physical health and a trend and well being

that I could then you know like oh. You know like if I'm, if I'm doing pull ups than I can prove do two or three more than I thought I could we have known that previously, it was just as some of a weird thing that I learned by going through this very physical process right to apply to my mental world than the rest of my life to bad example, because it's not like a life or death, how thing, but there must have been things that you went through and if you really thought about it, I bet you'd go oh yeah. I guess sure larger on a larger scale? I can think of a specific example, but I will say that if you had presented to me at the beginning like this is what we're going through, and you laid out all of the everything of it from the pooping of the south everything I'd be like I can't I couldn't do that. I can't there's no way I could get through all that that's insane, but I guess people are capable than for people of more than they think I

what I sort of took away from it sounds like you. It sounds like maybe you are like this before, but it sounds like you're really sort of learn them just get through whatever you can get through in a day dear and start over tomorrow in yesterday's tomorrow, the reset button, or at least another go back to square one button, and you can now finally get it and get it right in the automated she today, maybe tomorrow lumpy, because the recovery Incremental was there ever a morning that you did wake up and go. Was there one clarity moment? We welcome and I gotta think, I'm better. I think now No, no! That was frustrating and I really want I'm a fan movie, vanilla sky. I really like that movie ever seen it yeah, but a long time ago, the people most people don't like as much as I do, but there's a point at which the right in the middle, the Movie Tom Cruise, has suffered a car accident, semi disfigured the girl here Don't like him. She may be hooked up with his best friend ease the horrible night in the bar Andy's drunken staggering harmony falls into like a puddle, no the street, the next more

he wakes up and everything is the sudden, better Penelope cruises there. She often out of the bottle on the sun shining is just beautiful and it's it's it's. That did not sky moment that I wanted. I wanted to follow in the while one night and the next morning wake up and if not, how crews that my wife, someone to be there may be some groups, so want to be there and then be like hastily be a euro area or even worse for the where and help me up and make breakfast, and it's like, I feel better, never happened It's a fantasy that sounded fantastic and our lover to happen, but I hope People realise that even it doesn't happen. All is not lost. Their still hope- and still feel. What do you feel like now, when you wake up in the morning now that you're be no five years past superseding do geez I am I feel I am

I have to remind myself not all that thing. Is I'm aware of it? I'm very cognizant of how lucky I am a member I am area that I survive but I did not have still here. I understand that that thirteen percent of people we're diagnosis, but I was diagnosed with live to three years. Keys right. I understand that I'm I'm constantly aware of how lucky I am that Christy's in my life, let alone as my wife, but just in my part of my life and end, but I have to and in the family that I do, and I have the job that I do, I'm extremely lucky to be working on such a great podcast intend, and to have access to do good things like theirs, to talk to you and to constantly, where of it. And if I ever after mine myself, I do, but

just being aware of how lucky I am is sort of my answer to that question. Not not not that I would ever suggest that what you went through was good, but this book that you wrote an all and they now and hopefully old, redoing speaking tourism? I'm gonna be doing some my so you wrote about these. You book signings and nodded how, go very nervous about it. I'm doing I'm doing a few of them, I'm doing a few of them, the next its rate, the books and he's a great meat, because people, if someone's going to pay if someone's gonna, buy book? It requires effort on their part, and it's amazing to me that anyone ever buys anything India so took too to be motivated to buy something with ideas that you put into it right, but then to show up on top of that year it you're gonna, absolutely love it, and If I should be, should be prepared for it to be. I mean my book wasn't my because just about us,

life recovery from earth, sobriety, standpoint and passionate here's years is ethically like a real. You know not that I mean look. Obviously, alcoholism can kill people, but you know, I think, between the two. Brain tumor is pretty fucking bad if you're, given the choice, yeah exactly so You know I It's not really fair for me to say ones worse than the other, but it feels like brain tempers. Roughly a little because brain to yeah yeah, I don't know again joy, given the joints, certainly more fun. But what I will say what I will say is that some of the brain tumor now what it right, of course, but what I will say is that term you should prepare yourself emotionally, because I think I think it's gonna be a most I mean it's gonna, be emotional for people showing up be. I think you understand how important this is. This is really important

that you do this because again you know other people are out there. I mean the fact that if this book just touched, you know one person's life it made the quality of one person's life better. You know it's gonna be, or that there be a huge wasted time that one invoking book for one person dear you're, shouting at the one guy who showed up when I hear that after you can't opened my eyes, but I think you know people are out there who need something to connect with or some one to look up to or some thing that they can. You know we're, basically just them we're just a collective consciousness of experiences that have happened. Up till now and we need to access those to know how to proceed allotted

times, and so maybe you know people who find this book, it speaks in exactly the right way that they didn't have before that they didn't have hope they didn't know what to expect a. They didn't have the sight of it. So it's really really like Europe, essentially a living. You're a living trophy of hope for people and also what that blurb yeah don't get a big had about it, no pun intended, but this book is really that's important. It's important that you go around and talk to people in it's important that you you know, I share your experience is because, even if you do nothing more than share your experiences, that's that's. That's helpful. Ample! That's incredibly helpful to people, so I think your book signings you know they can run the gamut of an object. Van apart gas, our sorry browser you too, you know people pro not really being able to keep it together, because it's a very emotional experience for them, and so it might, it could bring up emotional stuff,

for you? So just you know, I don't know how the person you are, but I would just sort of be I'll, be prepared that you know it it could you might relieve some of it in the process. You literally near the second person. Bring that up and the second person are rightly in twenty four hours. Corolla asked and lead the same question last night like hey, you ve done book soundings before. What's it like Is that all you're going to do fine, bye, bye? You need specifically mentioned the like. It's going to be emotional, like people are going to want to talk to you about situation or their whatever. It's gonna, surprise, you, I think it's gonna, surprise you how much it will affect people, particularly a book like this, I think I'll have you didn't think about me was to end it when I was a failure to do your very close to a quick, as essentially when you're writing a book of this nature. You know when it's like all these things that happened to me, you're just you're, sorry dictating a lot of stuff that your brain is sparing no. Yet this happen, and in this and then I gotta put this here and then this is the right chapter. Four,

in this way I got out at this hour. There is but When you see it reflected back at you from other people it It is essentially a mirror and you you will it kind of forces you to to go down. Those emotion pathways? Again, I mean, I think, sometimes people write a book like this, that that is, emotional dream for them, but a lot of times. I think it's seeing the effect as other people and being reminded o this, you know you might feel it might bring up stuff for you. You know again what I mean I'm not I'm not. I cried like a bitch, I'm not I'm not! I'm not a word about. I nothing new to me. Not a word about that why- and I am looking forward to a man- I am very much hope. It touches people, hope, albums people laugh and cry of the old, a shave and open to help inspires people in order to make them laugh. Will it is it should because you know I'm sure they're, a million books they can read about that are either you know

new Agee are down, like you know very serious and clinical ran this but but but but the human aspect is really important because it it it does give people hope and it makes people feel like no one of the one of the reasons why humorous so powerful over the worst things that we can think of is because it gives us a few. It gives us a sense of control over them and so that people can laugh at something or they can that's why I was asking finally funny about it, because it's a very empowering experience, it's not to belittle the Its relative, diminish or be derisive about it, but to show like hey, fuck, you have power over this thing and other people cannot power over it. You know in the face of the the worst things. Imagine if you make a joke about anything, I a joke. I like a set up a punchline joke. You ve thought about that thing. You process that thing and you filtered out the funny out of it

distills in other the essence of what makes it fun and that's what's humanizing, that's part of a shared. You know human experience that we that we have. So when does book to start doing policy, but there is a lot of time. This comes out. I will have a signing up very close to two very close to meltdown and signed a book soup. Oh yeah books in front of it. So do not what other fats and bookstore yeah there's a couple. There's a book soup, the skylight books and Silverlake, though Ass Bookstore, town all the last bookstore press ourselves, progress now doing by books. You may thirty. First, I believe, a seven p, seventh fibres. Evidence on their websites on my website did a little beyond every website in the world when you were going through the when you're going prove it came out when you were in the hospital in Europe

you're seeing other people there are you? Are you embracing that experience or are you trying to pull? blinders and go I don't wanna. I can't focus on any of that the reason I sent us either is neither reaction or members of the hospital ones, and I saw a little girl. We see always tell who is the patient as they have the respect of shorter day, the name data? their names, a little girl just on paying had to tell a little pink cap on seed laughter heresies like five years old. Is the fuckin worse thing ever, but that's. You know I didn't blinders on. I was actually very aware are trying to be very wary of horse. Was there and everyone else, and you really get an idea, smashing the radiation centre, because I was going every day for six weeks. You get an idea of whose there and who the regulars are and what people are up to super com? A simple go see: people

seem to be doing while some people are doing pretty fuckin badly, and I mean everyone from old. Old couples to young couples and people arrives in either Mary Justino friends or boyfriend girlfriends, and there is a couple who travel from Jamaica because place I was going cedars Sinai is the best is one of the best in the world for training cancer, so they travelled. For outside the area. I just was aware of people's body languages and and they're, not body language, which is by no means of legal works. Was excited to be there in the sense that it felt like we're doing something, we're meeting, treated there actually treating my concentrate on people. I know it's weird but some people obviously- I remember one lady was really put out to be there. She was like a forty, issuer old soccer, mom type, and she was like yelling at the people like? I have to pick my from Bob lie after I've. Never waiter this long and it's like she wasn't me

bet. She was just that's how her body, in her mind, was reacting to the environment. You don't want to be there if you want to be on their life, that being there to her, was being sick ass. You want to be around the world getting her kid or doing whatever having so she was mad at this she was mad at the cancer. She was the I'm sure she was, but it was manifesting itself as being managed everyone else Jack. You can't it's not yeah, yeah cancer. Can you like to you, but you you can't people people's people's attitudes. Peoples live manifested themselves in very different ways. So what did you ultimately? What How did you learn about? Did you learn, anything about humanity? Was there any great revelation at the end of it or is it not that is it not that romantic of, like oh, admitted, the yen I realize I mean now the small thing I took away from all that was everywhere, has their own their own speed and their own pace and their own. You can't

one deals with cancer. The right way no deals cancer, the wrong way, everyone deals of cancer in their own way and who's. To say that I did it who said I did wrong moves to say that anyone in always this. How, as I said, Christy when initially with our tell our friends in our family, some people, something locked away, so we will sort of fell away from our lives. A little debt me because there are freaked out. Maybe They were scared, maybe because dead reminded them they're their own mortality. Maybe they had a family member who passed away. Cancer, I dont, know what it was. Increased you'll get frustrated, I'd, say you can't fault one further. Natural reaction is: choice is to be again, leave earlier exit our lives and in whatever that's one thing for US Natural reaction is to be freaked out and not do what to do and not act around us. Haven't you ve all someone for that is just how they react. You can't control is to ignore the control high react to it to those people

back around later extend relates to an ex no now would never really kind of persons are too late, because I understand that cancer is a fucking. Good thing and we are with thirty year old friend, yours, it's pretty That's a mirror, you know holding up at your own mortality right in yeah, because you don't really start well. I shouldn t I one doesn't fit you don't really get. I don't. I didn't really start thinking about life and death stuff until I hit like late thirties before I started to go. Oh yeah! This doesn't go on forever in order when you're you're too. Of all the time an hour ago, Ardashir Club area, but then and starting to realise like oh. I know this all at some point. This just now stop. Is our really know how that's gonna go, so you know what is the

what's important for you to you know? Did you sort of think about like I have to leave? My marker doesn't really matter well and as much as you know, my legacy counts. I think this boy As I was running- and I was very aware of that- I was like this is the right Molly what happened to me, but it's record of my life up to this point. For all intents and purposes, and its most of the story, I deem important detail about my life and I've learned both through my sickness and otherwise, and so as much as I make films and write tons of books and do all that stuff. This is my legacy. This will be around for people to read hopefully forever and until he goes out of print It is not sprint. Second version so that was my. That was what was aware that, as I was writing it excellent. And then can you explain oh you put the bone in boner. I can show you

so another turn that makes a lie and turn the bug Katy get over here Katy Levine. That is the second part gas that I've thread do something horrible sexual indicated people with its motive reversal, and it wasn't me and made me Mean Anderson, my hope, my cousin, the film ball, but one point threaten offered to show Katy what it meant to be airtight. Because she had only really was out of the political forces of the blue. You know bride you, Somehow, hopefully have managed. Some are brand new skills. We managed to take an hour where not one person could not be on your side ass, an you ve, just completely flipped like an Othello bored

You flip the value is a pop up. We will keep it gets you. That's the dichotomy me brother, this port, wait why? What Jesus Christ. Well, I'm glad you're here to make horrible jokes, no one's happier than me and in its bid good to see you and you honestly, if you hadn't, the book, and you haven't told me that you that you have to brain tumor and a net? She lost the use of a lot of your body, and yet I never would have known any of the other. Does the vial They re absently viral appreciate that absolutely on Alot well looks about yourself up thanks. I've had got mad at traffic. Today I know I know I gotta remember I gotta I do. I do have to remember, but I do like the idea of like if you can't sweat the small it's a good day, yeah, it's a nice

thing when you can worry about little things yet so remember that when you tell me that rooms to echo either wording in or you know, a Crescent Chris Moses Data. I didn't say that user that your voice is clearly now I was you offered and Katy. I didn't do that Brian. That was you. You have to forgive him. You don't have to forgive him Was there anything that you did were you're like I get a free pass cause. You know too oh wow. A jury duty for rest, my life did you react by Doktor Romeo? No, when I was at the word, I gotta Jerry, some as well as at the worst, my lowest point. I'm there very difficult times. Eyes. They even took that I was leaving Emily fucked up, and so I applied for adults, this thing in their alike. Oh you have to get this this because they are pretty. You know you have to get serious doctors, like notes, led not just a hey, this guy sick, you have a guy, If occasion stuff and my doctor wrote the thing that the whole thing like this guy cannot judge jury duty for the next two hundred and twelve months-

another major sound. Pretty bad has like. I am pretty bad the Good NEWS is, I gotta do it? Who that actually is pretty good news, because it's very hard to get at a jury duty. They don't give a fuck man, you are there. Now there was a bad times, no matter what I have to sneeze hang on. Given by our baggage I've gotta, get their checked up for work. Voters. Can you don't don't fucking, listen, I'm I'm a borderline and that's a borderline, I profoundly out what we have today. I dont know what I have today. Maybe a home later when I got home, we like to render looks like my girlfriend would be able to tell me that. Do you ever get headaches, no, not really been funding. For said yes, dammit yeah I just my brain always goes to the to the workplace, but it's I am weird, but also its? I feel like it's important. Me to get the details of this kind of thing.

Time to and talk to you because you know no I'm proud to have been like, oh my god, what oh, what a fire? What have I would have liked, but I feel it is important to face that suffered its important. You know it's important to not run from that shit, because if you're gonna happen, I can't theirs about a cats advocates. It's it's all in your reaction is not in what happens to you so you think something horrible around with me. That's I'm trying to say, oh god, dammit. What this is about. We talk about for a shit is bad news: tuna network for nerve cells by Brian Calloway like I want to get promoting. Yes, I gotta bring in and outside guys got more experience here. You can be Notetaker referenda. The only know take about had noted, you still not believe Geiger Excellent reports to Tpa.

So where can people find you on the internet browser a car more I'm a very active tweet or so at bald, Brian brain with a? Why excellent? Yet and Bob I'm being an aim that Corolla has bestowed upon me for years and years and years good to see a man with a semi like genuinely good, thanks, like in a real sense, can appreciate me on and a big fan of at midnight hour. Lanky verbal show Siena once months have a show and a lot of integration. But good luck with the you know. I think I think you're starting a new journey thanks man, this book, that damn you know, will surprise you, but in but it'll the result will I'll be really really path. I'm really excited about it. So thanks for saying that, of course, I hope your next book is just about donors must still be shrinkage

boy. Now I could say after progress like this, it is very important guys to enjoy your burrito. Do you wanna tell me and you're the Brito, because you because they enjoy my reader. Sir. Now Joe, enjoy your Brito everyone yeah coming from brain. For God's sake, it has all you have to go away, go by and high Katie's dog yeah leading noticed dot com Are you alright