This is Jocapa Podcast number one. Sixty three Charles in me, Jocker, willing bidding echo good evening. I am bleeding out I can feel my life ebbing away as blood seeps for my body into the iraqi soil. The few brown weeds, splashed crimson, now are crushed around me ass. I lay sprawled on my back in the middle of this ambush, the way AIDS offer no concealment, I'm in the open alone and wounded, Cecil's of pain hit me in waves, like pulses of electricity, a bullet. Torn off my left arm after I get hit I reach over. Grab my left hand, it isn't there

I haven't around feeling only the gear on the far left side of my body no arm. I try to move the fingers on my left hand, but my mind send signals to a station that doesn't exist. I can't feel anything but pain, but its kick dirt in my face, through night vision. Goggles. I see green blooms of light stroll being the darkness muzzle flashes from automatic weapons. Ten metres away. An enemy machine gun opens fire again built FED Russian made crew served weapon. Probably, P M: they sound like giant zippers tearing open when the gun Go cyclic like now. The around me erupts with sharp cracks them

Your sonic booms of seven six to millimeter bullets, speeding, pass me at two thousand five hundred feet per second: the terror, Gunnar lowers his aim, a spurt of dust. The blows across my face again, several Its past so close to my head that I feel shock waves as they go by two left in eighteen, forty, seven, a soul rifle opens up than another and in the crossfire, without cover concealment, a crook, sitting dock in a kill zone, at least a hundred metres long and seventy five deep. With my right hand, I e the radio hands that I have mounted on my chest: troops in contact troops in contact. I called at my command Three severely wounded, including me static. Greets my words. I can't doc

I can't crawled away theirs a place to hide all like, do is ignored the incoming fire and stay focused. The Peking. Pick Gunnar finds the range bullet crack around me. Dirt flies. The terrorist ease up on the tremor trigger but only for a second. Here I am unleash another burst, then. I hear nothing at all. And those right there are some excerpts, from the opening chapter of a book called the trident which is written by

a retired seal officer by the name of Jason, J, Redman and. This book does an incredible job not only of bringing reader to the front lines in some pretty chaotic, combat situations, but equally important. It brings the reader into challenges of leadership and the challenge of life, especially the challenges we are facing. Never again, adversity. And Jays book. Humbly displays those challenges wide open for all to see and that humility from J is what makes it spoke so beneficial.

He tells us plainly and blunt of his purse, Nor triumphs and tragedies his victories. It is defeats and how he eventually found success and overcame by travelling. The path of humility. And since I have the honour of actually knowing J, he has been kind enough to come by this evening and talk about his experiences with us so with that Mr J Redmond, thanks to stop and by brother Jacko, rather echo. Thank you. Thank you. Both I also asked to have you sitting here: man

an honor to still be here blast. That's for sure. You know, like I tell so many people, I'm living on a second chance. You know you and I got to many brothers who are not. I don't know why the big man, Did you give me a chance barter, making the most of it outstanding what I want to try and start. You know little at the beginning, people get a little bit familiar with where you are. If one always wants, no, where people are working, came from, how they grew up. I'm going to the book right here, I came from a family with a rich tradition of service. So in retrospect this made sense. My dad was a: U S: Army, airborne rigour at four Campbell during the Vietnam WAR. My paternal grandfather earned distinguished flying cross, while piloting be twenty four liberated bomber over the flag filled skies of Hitler's Europe aisles A great uncle who flew fighter aircraft in the South West Pacific during World WAR two he made the ultimate sacrifice in battle against the gene. Bernice. I do.

End of adding to that legacy. A life of combat metal and service. I was young, and I even had a long road to travel before. I could truly understand what my grandfather and great uncle gave for the country but that idealism became a very big. Pardon me I will they carry a rifle for a living. My dad watch. This desire grow in me, and did the folks it I mean your high school. We sat me down in our tiny living room and said you know J. We had these has come to airborne school. They were? U S, Navy called seals. They dot of aeroplanes swam. They boots blue stuff up, given how Of the water, maybe you ought to look into them Your dad Planet proceed ha a young age, and you know this was ninety.

Please. I'm sorry. Probably eighty, nine, eighty, eight, eighty nine so back, then you really couldn't find hardly anything about the seal teams and- This was at a point in time where G Joe, was big and to get twelve thirteen year old kid into that in that house, probably about fourteen. When my dad told me about the seal teams. And I started research in it found almost nothing and by sheer happenstance. One of the guys in our church was a huge special operations, but he was a guy that was unable to go in the military. He had had polio actually when he was a kid, but he was just infatuated by it and he had done tons of research and he actually had collected something about the scheele team- she had an old soldier of Fortune magazine

yeah, there's those awesome, it's so different. Nowadays, no now did you just Google. It examined the back. In the day, you had to be lucky enough to know some dude in church who happen to have a copy of the issue of soldier of fortune mags. That still a thing is just one still out there do it actually is. As a matter of fact, somehow, in some weird twist of fate, I ended being on the cover of soldier of fortune after the book came out, and it was the most bizarre thing because now you know you're in the military, and you look at this thing. You kind of laugh at Sarah Fortune, it's a little bit of a A really focuses on probably the the Gung HO aspect of saw as opposed to you came for Serbia. Full circle transfer shrilled soldier of fortune. It was it was pretty funny, but but- magazine and that journey of coming to understand who these I swore that you really couldn't find much about them is drew me any more and the only thing

The core thread that I found over and over again was Tavis training in the military. And you know I was a young kid. I was a small kid and I just had this fire that if you told me I couldn't do something it just drove me even more and want to do it and everyone. You know at that point my life of I for eleven Avenant about ninety five, so when I told people hours can become a seal, they laughed me out of the room and that just fuelled me even harder, and I shut my sight on that dream and that's where I was going, can you eat some of the things you did have you started playing football? You started getting involved in sports to make sure you were physically fit and all that, so that was part of the driving factors, part of any good way to store to prepare, at least in a minimum wage for

yeah, absolutely I mean I wanted to build a mindset. I knew that fitness. I knew that being part of a team. I knew that pushing myself in different areas. I start wrestling and I start plan for one of the smallest guy on our team bud man- I just I log football- I've always loved football. My dad and always told me now, you're too small to small you're gonna, get and so probably my tenth grade year. I said I don't care what you're telling me I'm I'm going out for the team. And thankfully we lived in a really small town and I think they would take any one and they looked at me and their share. Well, you know we can at least easier as attack Y know me. And I said, Roger that I'll do it may. As you know, I will I'll I'll hit somebody as hard as my ninety five pounds care and got, out there and just allowed the sport in all. I was not, starter in any way, but I was out there every day, just grind it and I'm trying to lay the hardest hit. I could on people and I played receiver and corner back and most now

I was also a little bit as as I read through the book and was kind of piecing together what you like, when you were a kid. I got to this point here, he's kind of a little bit of it from direction going back to the book. At the same time, I fell in with the wrong crowd. I got a job, you year and my work friends were, drinkers. I started sneaking out of the house by sliding down the attentive pull outside my window. At me, with friends. We'd go drink at stagger home drunk at all hours of the night scaling the side of the house with the help of that Paul. My fate, we try to nudge me into course, correction, but I had a chip on my shoulder and refused to listen, especially to my dad. Things got worse, Marilla people, my father and stepmom spiral out of control into the ground, months of this war, us all down, as that slide continued, that that happens right. I mean that straight up happens to kids, especially boys,

I think my thick hey, I'm going prove myself and one of the ways of yourself and one of the ways to prove yourself is by proving that you're willing to sacrifice in a way and what better way when you're sixteen years old prove like a watch, what I'll do I'll drink all drink this whole bottle and I can tell it's too young males doing allotted dumb stuff. It sounds like you're right on board Absolutely you noted that the thing that shape meet others, where I got really lucky, as I was smart enough and in discipline, deny to understand that, if I got myself in any kind of major trouble, I wouldn't be able to go in the seal terrorists. So like I said, we lived in a real small town in Rule North Carolina and you know, drugs were prevalent and a lot of my friends were starting to get into that, and I just said man if I get middle that'll

taught me from going in the Navy show at least there was kind of a line was our oil and across Unfortunately, there are a couple of times we got ourselves in trouble where you know we're right on the edge of the law be involved in it. Are we managed to dodge that bullet, but yeah, I wanted to get out there. I want to fit in so I think it's a combination of both peer pressure as a young man, and I want to fit in with this group, but I have my hopes and dreams. So this the direction I'm going and I think that's where a lot of you get off track. They want to fit in so much that they give up on their hopes and dreams and they get shot down. This path For me, I had such loot laser focus on what I wanted to do, that it at least kept me in check there. I will say this just a kind of add to that point from perspective. If you If you got someone, that's aspiring to do something, you know higher the p

that don't have those aspirations are more than happy to train crash. That dream form then more than happy to pull them down, and so I've found that throughout life If you have some high aspiration that are trying to achieve here, you see some. That's got high aspirations that they're trying to cheat. You can watch the people, round them. If they're, not good people, try to read those things in Poland down and pull off that track scary sonic. With its unequivocal I mean it's one of the tenants. I now speak on Can I call the Pentagon repeat performance and the fifth level is or outside the fourth level as social leadership, so how we lead our We build our ring of friends and influencers and in your right, a great influence or an entrepreneur. I've been recently working with

he gives an amazing analogy of he- was up in Alaska on a vacation. He was walking the beach and there was a fisherman that was fishing with a net and catching crabs. He was putting the crabs in a bucket, and you know what's really morning the guy's name bedrooms. Korean invaders was watching this happen in early in the morning. Looked in the bucket knows about ten crabs, probably about five gallon Balkan, probably about eight inches of water, and he kept watching us one crap, what climb up and gravel on to the edge of the bucket and try to pull itself out and like tells the fishermen, hey, hey man died, I won't let you know, you'll lose. What are your crops and the fishermen does turn around look at it keeps drawn is not and it goes watch what happens and address kind of steps back and he looks down into the bucket and he watches as all the other crabs grab onto that other crab and pull him back down and

had this epiphany moment the circles of influence he had in his life, and he was like. Oh my god, I have crabs in my life. He's like I have people that I want to climb up and be better and they're pulling me down and it is on equivocally Truman. It's something I brought up to the buds do that yesterday. I said if you want to the best seal. You need to surround yourself with the guys who are driven discipline and their pushing themselves to the edge. If you want to go to the next level, you need to surround yourself with the guys who were either already there they aspire how to get there cuz if you're going to surround yourself with people who are content to just drink and not move forward at all they're going to try and pull you into that circle, because they're going to feel threatened that you don't want to do what they're. And they want you to assimilate with down burst, striving board and being successful its unfortunate just kind of a whale life. It's horrible it's horrible situation, so watch out for it, because it's everywhere,

so any you end up see graduate high school gotta recruiter in boom. Right at me, any any other. Particular things around the recruitment process. The other recruitment process was actually, I actually kind of got off track little. So I to the recruitment station. I, as soon as I said, I want be a seal. I went to the recruited station just fifteen years old, this ninety five pound weakling and walk into the recruiting station and, unlike how would it be a seal and there was an old, crush the army. He was like an old school, probably twenty five years. Six and just Rusty is all get out. You know boats in May and that dude basically laughed me out of the office. Let's get out of here, stop wasting our time. You know Youtube We need to carry the paddle much less the boat get out of my office and

didn't phase me in the least I came back like next week and was like I want to be a seal and they this guy chase me out of the office. I came back about four or five times and he just continue do not even give me the time of day saw. Finally, I was you no kind of tired that travel things are real rough when recruiter won't gave a kid. The time of day, yeah like that quota is hard core ol man well humming take about a twenty five year. He said he was at a point. He didn't really care. So you know when I the point I came back again, probably about eight months later and at this point you know really started. Trainers focused on it. I didn't. Let him deter me, and I came and he had left just sure happenstance she was gone and there was a new recruiter and thereby by the name of Henry Horn Henriette. Out there you listen to this. I've never been able to track down and thank him, but

took me and it was like a man absolute. We sit down at this video. You may remember that, be someone special and it was the cheeses whose, like nineteen eighties video at its best and and it was this high speed in other seals, come in, I how a copper and they get out and they take down this target and take out these terrorists tagline is be someone special and I just aided man and came back on a regular basis and an Henry was fantastic. He told me these, you need to do. You know: ass bad fitness. What's gonna happen so went to are went to go sign up. You know, right as I was turning seventeen, I was going to do the delayed entry program and I went to go sign up and went so I got back up for a second. There was a glitch, I'm sorry my fax backwards here. I actually because of the deal with the crushing

Six I was him being blocked me. I change my mind is cited: go army at First TAT, Henry happened after this. I'm sorry I got that backwards Henry happened after this, and when I went back, I decided to join the army S and will find my dad. You know he was army. The rangers I'll go the Green Berets rap, so I went to maps to pray, hour to do my intake screening for the army delayed entry program and I failed the physical, because when I was a kid I ruptured my eardrum and I had a lot of scar tissue on my eardrum and the army said: oh well, you're not going to be able to eat I was so they tried to convince me to still go in. There were like, or will you don't have to be an airborne ranger? You know you can do this, you can do that. You can drive trucks and I was like now man, that's not what I want to do so I left and I didn't sign up and probably a couple months, went by and then that's when I came back and the crush six was gone and Henry Horn was there and really help pages

path, show kind of an interest. She rode in now the Westin is, this is there's always gonna, be road blocks that are going to deter you from your dreams. You know, don't let it stop. You keep driving forward by you know, if I just listen to that guy right from the beginning, you know I never would have been a seal. You going to show up at Bud's? I like this is a good going back to the book, your your intro to Bud's one night. I was ordered to escort a member of class, one hundred and ninety nine back to his room building in six hundred and two he'd quit the program maybe required an escort for anyone who rang the Bell. During Hell week I went off to find him in the darkness. He was waiting for me, a smaller guy like me, wrapped in a blanket he was shivering so badly. He seemed ready to fly apart. He put the blame, over his head, like a hood. Giving he may monastic look He said little, so we made our way to the barracks in silence.

Alongside him fit fit burst wanting to get any details on what I'd soon experience. Finally, I couldn't stand at him anymore. Reached his door and opened it. I blurted out So come on man. What was it like? You turned to me and looked me in the eyes. His rooms night light cast in, Finch glow across his face his skin. Was waxen and he looked hollowed out? length he answered in a slow earnest tone, dude so cold. I would have poured gasoline all over myself and lit a match just so I could have been worn for a few seconds before I burned to death. He stepped back without another word and slammed the door for the this time. I wondered what I got myself into. As legitimate right there but I saw so there's a this

Not only did that blow my mind, you know, there's a funny little side story. We actually had to edit that so the fire thing we actually created what he actually. He told me that exact thing, though so the dialogue is the same, but He told me was about is vulgar as all get out. It would have made the boy raided triple x, and it was so mine blowing, because I mean the fire thing we try to come up with what is as impact for your asshole, but it does.

Combat all, let your imaginations run mild, but what you told me and he slammed the door my face left me so stone tat. I was like what the hell did. I get myself and I mean it, but we could not put it in the marina was so bad a mouse like my kids can never really check check. So anyways I mean, then you get about you, go through buds and buds is cool and you were right about buds a little button here, but you don't spend a bunch time on it because, as we know, but does not a huge part of our careers in the seal teams, and I'm going jump right right ahead too. Book here, seven years and three south american deployments into mice career as a seal. I found myself in Fort Knox Kentucky working as a basic, or for instructor with a small group of fellow operators. We worked eighteen hour days but being twentysomething and single once the gear,

stowed. All we wanted to do was get out on the town and blew off some steam work, hard play hard that was our pre nine eleven mantra, the nine these teams, we're a card play hard, I always to explain to people how cool it is being in the team being an if I've and the teams were you in five or six at this point, new five five and the teams- and I was on the story? The other day this when I got seal team, one minute it was, I was a new guy- knows quietly walking through the locker room, trying to keep my eyes averted from looking at anyone- and I hear this ass, an old like, oh, my god, and whose is like barbaric yell from this human being a who is one, and then I looked at him and he was this monster guy, probably six thousand seven hundred and sixty six

two hundred and eighty pounds of tattooed flesh and so once. I what happened and he I do made five mass Turkey is far as I'm concerned so yeah. You know you get to be any five in a sealed tune. You know you ve got if you, if you're not looking for a lot of lot. Responsibility won't find it, but you won't. You know. You're bleeding above some of the crap work. So it's not a bad. Is to be in that's where you were doing doing deployment after deployment. Three deplore to our South America and doing the training We were training, sell at the team at this time. Was it already consolidated now, each team had its own individual training. Still I did that and this is also the time during one of these, Were you met your future wife? A tripe saw it on

in other seal teams are an interesting place because, beyond all male unit, in the only time you have an opportunity me, people Ladys is typically in the bars, because we did such a good job and I tell people the mindset of the early teams really was you know, Marcinko capture, that mindset in his book in his book, the rural warrior, but its interest, she posts nine eleven, how Gaza show laser focused on combat. You know both Ross literally we train hard, and then you know you are actually look down on if you didn't go out and party and burnt down to like four in the morning and then get an hour asleep and get up and start dreaming and the next day you know which was just stupid. You know your operating at optimum efficiency, but thousands to wear washed out was life was like accepted. It Drove through so yeah I was fortunate enough. One night we went into our

a crazy, huge bar that somebody scouted out and said: hey man. This is a target written by Iraq and the Phoenix Ill Tavern went in there and the beautiful blonde walked in and I was like. I need to get to know this young lady we did all right. Man alone along. The course of this you apply for the seeming to annual programme, which is the same programme. I did think you're a couple years behind me and we're going to guide, applied to the Seamen apple programme, something the Navy started to encourage top performing enlisted to become officers. Only fifty candidates a year except it back then to the competition was fierce. I gained a slot. The navy sent me to college just in time to miss the outbreak of the war. I I urge the towers fall. I recognise the magnitude of the moment and left school, when a day's fully aware that our country was heading to war with three years of college ahead of me, I feared at

my chance to be a part of it. A few days later I drove back to old seal team to see my former ceo and mentor commander, Vince Petersen here like his neck out for me more than once and had been in, mental. Getting me a shot, a slot in the seamen annual programme. I told him I to drop out of school, so I could get back to a protein and help with the war effort commit Petersen sat listening quietly as Ex, as I explained my desire to come back. He was I joined in the seal teams. He had been a former marine before joining the Navy and headed too. You'll training at the age of thirty six He was highly respected, both up and down the chain of command in my leadership fence analogy: most men fell on one side of the fence or the other, while there those small few who had the unique ability to stand on top and move back and forth from it. Petersen. There was no fence as I sat down with him and asked him to put me back in the pool

He looked me dead in the eye and said read. This will not be a short war, its to go on for years, and we're gonna need strong warriors and leaders were upcoming battles. You need to stay in school then come back and lead check. I when I read that, of course, I thought about guess what I was doing, where nine eleven happened I was in college is well on the same programme, us probably a year to ahead of of you and guess what I did same thing. I called the detail or who was friend of mine who I had worked for, and I said, hey, I don't care about college I'll, get you online. I don't care about. Any of this. Send me back to seal team right now. Please- and you know this individual to- is

is well, and I know this guy is and that he told me the exact same thing. He said this war is going to last a long time. Of course I didn't believe it and it you know. And this is what s interesting. I recently saw the guy that I called Ah and his wife, who I know his wife and she's great person- and I was telling you telling you this in what she said. It was so awesome here she goes. Do you know how many calls he got that day? So there was zero, unique about Jacko Colander, this evil deeds, once in Sir said, give me back to a team right now, every single guy that wasn't into seal team in the teams we everyone's gonna, be billet of any kind, was call in the detail, say, get big fella d put me a coach, yeah, cynical

Let me tell you talking about we we were. We were just training and training and training and be like training for a in turn for the Superbowl never get the black. So. You use. Are you actually did a great job in college and you you, you were in ROTC to write right. I was ya, see I got the real scam deal. What went to college was. Where a uniform Isaac far enough ahead of you, that I got there dear you're in the original programme. So you got commission and went to school as an officer say you have paid off serpent, I shall go to school. I got the most ridiculous deal. I apologise to the taxpayers. Yeah. I think in the Navy quickly realized, ok, yeah. We screwed this one up selling. It took him to innovations yeah I was in because I think I was in the third interaction, third or fourth yadda no, we actually were required to be a part of our ROTC, so you know every day, We were. We were up early and we and D

RO, generosity general at that time was the largest majority she consortium on the EAST coast, so you had Hampton diversity, you had already you all Dominion University at Norfolk State and they had at that time, probably about. I think we read about three hundred and thirty midshipman an officer candidates and we had a huge contingent of. Action listed. So there was actually was price. Six or seven seals and the programme there at that time was good ad teammates to go through with butter yeah man, we played all the games at real quickly. I realized- I said: okay, you know they wanted. You you've got to step up. You know they're, going to put you into these different positions and a lot of the guys going to come there before me, we're kind of like no dude. We don't want to do anything. We don't want to be involved. We just want to get a lot of, typical team guys. We want to create our own little circle of of trust. We don't wanna, let anybody else in the circle, and I was like not man

We have changed our mindset in others, young kids, here that we can influence to become future frogman. I should and dark, as there was no that all these communities at the school, They had they had. You know: surface warfare, community that had the aviation club, they had the sub mariner club, but there was no special operations club. And there were young kids were interested. I show what we create this. You know we have the experience. We can these kids and then the other thing I status. I said: well it all. I'm gonna try and step up in the leadership positions and I think all the rest of us to do the same, and and thankfully in our work we all jumped on board man. You know I was fortunate. I did excel in school and I ended up leaving school ass. These student battalion commanding officer prior to being commissioned to him. I was the regimental commander at officer, candidate school and

That was, you know the number one position yeah and I'm the man the I was talking to my mom, and I mentioned to which I shouldn't have done, because my mom just doesn't understand as it were I'm on the register has at last couple weeks, both yes it S. Just like us, what's going on now is, and I could call could you aren't allowed call does we're doing this and I'm in charge of the thing here. It's called the regimental commander and she was all so you're the commander and as a young, the regimental commander chicks, are you in charge of, and I said I am overseeing the cleaning. Every toilet political and it's going quite well so spotless spotless you

should you do a great job in college? And now you go back to the teams after college going back to the book instead of having an advantage, I found myself left behind everything in changed and as our platoon went through its training, so I I always felt like I was playing catch up. I made mistakes and exercises that I'm never made in the nineties. It made me edgy intense. Feeling the pressure of trying to be a leader and drinking from that training fire hose. At the same time I got tight, hold on even harder, which only made things worse in our time off. I drowned my frustrations and booze and routinely routinely made an ass myself, this was helping my credibility with the men I was supposed to be leading, but I didn't see that at the moment, it also didn't help that senior chief? carry and I despised each other almost from our interduction. He was good. Skilled seal and I respect that this technical.

What he's, but I felt as people skills were lacking rough a brace of at times- is leadership style clashed with mine, which set us on a collision course, while I privately railed against carry, I was blinded by arrogance, to see my own flaws, I wasn't making the good transition to being an officer- I've been in love, for so long. I identified with mine listed teammates more as one of them right That is one of their leaders. It put too far away from the fence this, Your chief and the a y see are supposed to work closely together to make sure The team functions effectively. The OECD in its assistant officer in charge also supposed to learn from the chief tactical experience that never happened in our instead I refuse to humble myself and listen to the senior chief as the pre deployment, cup war on I wouldn't can we would, couldn't Conseil I dislike for each other. The feud spilled out,

into the open and culminated with a public screaming match in Europe after attacked exercise with some NATO allies in the way that followed my arrival within team. Our relationship became cancer and our locker room by the time we got to Afghanistan. We refuse to be simply to each other I'd lost entirely with what it meant to be a leader during the daily, if we would openly take shots at each other. I talked about this dynamic. Times with my superior the patterns officer in charge. One day the oh, I see finally said: look you to have to work this out, I'm tired of it. We never could or did work things out differ well structure, structure, things in different ways, our platoon senior unlisted members acted as fire to leaders with chieftain some more experienced officers. Acting as the assault was commanders. I've been it is neither if I'd taken a step back I might have realized. I hadn't, given my boss, bushes much confidence in my leadership, but I didn't

that I only felt slighted and embittered rough tour, yeah, but all brought on by myself. I mean here the dynamics obviously created some interesting problems, but you know, as often happens, I wasn't taking ownership of my own actions and instead was just kind of trying to point fingers externally. Well, you know it's peak areas, fault that these things are happening when the reality was. Eighty percent of it with me. You know eighty percent of it, so it's one of the things that I talked to a lot of individuals about. I think you see it in special operations. I know you and I are both- have spoken to professional sports teams- I see it there, where young men accelerate quickly and achieve this elite status and then get a little bit of mammary with who they are.

Their ability asian lose sight of the end state, which is to be an effective part of that. To do their job show ruthlessly. Well it it plays a huge part in a team in at the end of the day, whether you're in professional sport whether you're in the seal teams rhythm, whether your end some elite business. You know, that's why to happen, and I lost sight of that and focused externally? Instead of internally and really now I speak a lot on what my three rules of leadership is in the foundational through first rule is lead yourself How you let yourself eighty percent of leadership is leading yourself. You know you talk so much about discipline. Italian discipline yourself. Tell you, structure, shelf Italian. Push yourself tell you set the example and in doing so, it automatically leads to rule number two led others and almost makes it easy to lead others, because you ve already done all the work they went too far.

Are you cause you're setting the example? I can add a backwards. I was trying to lead others, but I was reading myself. It's almost impossible to do, and I mean all these people. You know that I've gone out and bid. This and talk to, and they say, J man. How do I be a better leader and you know my first question- I was asked him. How well do you lead yourself, because that's where I really really failed? We talk, you know. In the several times you ve mention a principle, Talk about called the leadership. France and leadership fence was just kind of a concept that came up with after watching a lot of really good leaders and in bad leaders, including myself in that category. You know years later, I look and the idea was this that imagine chain, link, fence and and that fence represents where you are in your leadership. And on one side of the fence are all those you lead and on the other side, are those your report to your superiors,

Everybody has a natural tendency to kind of fall on one side of the fence or the other, depending on how they grew up or how they came into the organization. For me. Obviously, when you start out me one, I connected alot more with the guys on the side of the fence, and I was leading As a matter of fact, the teams back then typically wanted to switch coasts with guys yearningly sky. They won't send you out to the opposite coast, and that didn't happen for me, and I tell you what I look back on that now and I think that was a mistake. I you know like created my own problems and the seal teams were right in their thinking on how to do that, because now

The hardest leadership often is pure leadership. You know to break through those bonds, hey you, and I were both friends, but now I'm in charge of you. So how do we navigate that water said if you close with those people that makes it a lot more difficult in? Oh, you have to be the one that really asked break those bond, and sometimes you know it can damage French if you're, not careful with that, and I think I was more focused on retaining that. So that was on one side of the fence side of a lot of times. You see individuals that come into an organization later at a higher leadership position, so they get brought in as an officer they get brought in as a leader to accompany and their move more focused on that leadership position that they don't take the time to get to know the people their leading. So there, too far away from the fence it's a chain link fence so that you can talk through it.

So that you can communicate through it and the best leaders have the ability to be right up against that fence so whether there on either side there able to turn around and gain guidance from the individuals, whether it's their leadership and communicated through to those they lead or whether on the side of communicating and interacting with those they lead in communicating thrown getting guy. It's from who they follow. Problems arise when you're too far away from the French. You know that leaders who are so far on the other side of the fence at all their thinking about is how do I make the next rag? You know We know who they are, and we ve seen those guys who, literally you know you think man you would like chillier mother to make the next round to be. There should be that and then we also know those guys do you know they are not. Aspirations to try and get better on the other side of the fence. So we know we joked about the query fives northern perfectly, Don't you know the magic position in that seal teams where you know you're,

that level, where your high enough Bob did not do the groundwork, but you don't really have tremendous responsibilities. I was way too far away the bottom line, and this is where I was tremendously failing, not setting the example. I wasn't communicating with with the leaders. I was they were trying to provide me guidance and basically saying hey: do your beard strewn things up and even even p carry himself was trying to convey to me in his very abrasive where how do you know this is not the way you do but I was blinded both by half. Excelled at this point in my career really rocketing up and thinking. Oh, I know these things should. I'm the man show humility, is such a critical component leadership to take that step back and have anybody's, given you advice, always take a second to think through it and in you know a value

hey, even if maybe you don't think it applies, there's probably pieces of it that do that's the reality year was with someone, giving me critique points you know and of course in it every single, I say every single person on earth doesn't like receiving critique. I was joke about the fact that, even when someone asks for criticism when they yet they still get mad even ass, a hay j. Would you know take read this thing that I just wrote and tell me what you think of it, and then you you say you know, I thought I was a fool. You could do this alone, but there I'm gonna be mad right every. Gets mad, and so So what I do the same thing I take a step back when somebody gives me a critique point, even though uncombed we offended and I don't agree with them and I think I'm right someone egotistical maniac I put all that aside, I say: wait. A second there's a reason that they're telling me this there's gotta be some truth to it. I liked what favorite things about this book is the fact that it is.

Reveals the the the difficulties mentor and he just be able to come along and and then you'd be the perfect recipients, the perfect men, tea, ready to learn and everything's just perfect in it, and it's actually complete. Would be the perfect mentor and he just be able to come along and and then you'd be the perfect recipients, the perfect men, tea, ready to learn and everything's just perfect in it, and it's actually completely true, and what you haven't, this you'll teams actually in the like in the civilian sector companies and organisations. They have these personality and of different personalities, ensue teams, and so you think only suit him. You don't have that! No, you actually have it worse because you these guys. That of if really built their egos, been built up and we all think we're great. We all think we're tactical genius. We all think we don't have anything to learn, and so have a lot of issues around this exact kind of thing, and it does

we derail not just leaders, but it derails cartoons, and I mean we would this ban pull tunes, and when we would dismantle tune. That means upturns no longer going to exist. We'd have a platoon coming through training level too. We get disbanded. Happen very often, but it happens in when it happens. It is hasn't is zero to do with it forest fires and using the e sixes and has a hunter presented. You with the scenery sixes the chiefs and the officers inside obtained adjust our disasters, and it does here been, and I think the fact that you that the fact that you talk through? Some of these issues are that's. What that's which very revealing about the seal teams in this book is like hey, we got, you know We got the same issues that they have in other or any other team, any other organisation, and that that you know that thing that you talk about this this fence, you listen to me

the dichotomy leadership right. That's like even go too far in one direction of the other, and if you go too far in one direction, the other you're gonna. U can fall apart, the up so check. All right now, you're on the point in afghanistan- and I was I always maginnis this I haven't mentioned it yet but I ll mention it right now, because only readings all portions of this book and there so much more great detail in the book and you'll have a better understanding of these lessons. When you, when you read the whole thing, so it seems a little bit you'll see its jumping around a little bit. It's just because I'm only reading chunks of come back hold that book. You can read it yourself our rights are now speaking of jumping around you're in Afghanistan. You had a mission go down where it sound like you has got some bad intel and it caused a little bit of a problem. You hit the target pretty hard and you guys got put on an operational. Pause, meaning

you guys are going to do anything in another great story into how that unfolds is great and people should reads, We can learn lessons from that, but then I'm going to keep a lesson here. You are in the town hall and you're sitting with some your boys and I'm sorry. Ethically loose, lose use that term, because at this point you definitely or were boys with the boys and I'm going to the book. I've been searching for way to prove myself ever since I come aboard now the opera in order to do so had just fallen in my lap. I had to take it, time, I learned there is nothing more dangerous on the battlefield than an immature and arrogant officer who feels he needs to, himself, he can lead men to their death and what you're looking out, as you happen, to be sitting in the town hall with a commanding general, and these guys kind of your your boys kind of egg, you on to go talk to but hey. Why are we? Why are we

standard, not immune ensign. At this point, Ok, so here we go. I walked over and stood beside. The generals table. Excuse me, General Ensign, written Naval special warfare give a couple minutes. The glowered up at me stamped on their feet. This is who the hell are. You look made me momentarily waiver. The general invited me to sit down here. AIDS looked frosted and grew more. So after I begin to talk so I wanted to talk about this operational pause. We still seem to be it. I began. Generals, face, registering nothing but interest. I can t I know there is in this communication with our first mission, but we know the enemies out there and we would like to take the opportunity to go after them. The general heard me out then replied diplomatically well Ensign I've gotta, look at all the strategic factors here. We must have, way, this strategic impact with the impact on the civilian populace and there are locations to going out and operating at night. I understand that's her

right now, where the crazy time in a war- and we have to balance what we're doing, Well, general, I said I can hardly reach out a straight face. Well, general. I said we really feel like we can contribute in a positive way to buy going after the man who posed a clear and present threat to coalition forces and Jen. Noncommittal but remained polite. I dont think is AIDS took their eyes off. Neither the entire conversation. I could feel them boring holes through me. I thank them, for their time got up and headed backed my table, the other two operators were gone. Why haven't they stuck around get some yeah. Beware of peer pressure, be where you know once again, it comes back to that that lead yourself led yourself that founding principle, because you know, this was a dangerous thing and in it- and I did this- Ro Times during that appointment, you know this.

Misunderstanding or this idea that somehow there's the short cut to be an effective leader that there's this push bought me easy button that be look at me now, great leader- and this really was this moment- and maybe people, understand this was an interesting times. This wise was July of two thousand and five so June twenty eight. The two thousand five operation redwings had just happen, and that was our troop, so we had lost. You know we had lost five of our guys, including our troops, after we had lost my air Christian, should we had lost my good friend in the OECD. Platoon like Mcgreevy Irene, he was an echo too We are trained alongside those guys, so we nah grieving and we all wanted revenge. We all wanted to go after the enemy,

So the very first mission we did was the mission you talked about that got us in a little bit of trouble. So now take the dynamics of everybody grieving, because so the loss of our teammates and and then doing our first mission and being put in hack because of really some outstanding issues are you can read about in the book. We had actually done everything right, but it kind of got place back us. So I just you know it these moments at as a young leader, whether you're in a business, whether in the military law portion whatever you do that see the short cut. Oh, look what I can do and it got fuelled when you know my tea, Mason I shot there and started talk in, and you know teammates where the biggest you know, shit talkers on planets and they

they definitely were egg me on, and I ended up hook line- and I was like you are absolutely right here- is a great opportunity for me to shed some amazing wisdom and insight to this general, where he now is going to be like oh young and sand you're. So right we should absolutely allow you guys to go out to conduct all these operations because I'm you know smart enough to allow this to happen in the air. The arrogance that I had and really sad that I didn't think through you know what are the implications of this. You know for you to go. Do that amuse. Just stupid decision and I realized it as soon as those guys were gone like all the sudden. Unlike What did you just do more on and, as I walk back from the Chow Hall to two are our camp? I was like

This isn't going to go with your boss that you did it right. I went straight back to my ceo and I said hey I want to let you know what just happened. I said I thought it was good idea and I don't think it was. As you know, was spawning he kind of looked at me, and he said why why? Why did you think that was a good idea? and I had I Jaguar was doing it for the boys, it's about the boys out, so you really at the end of the day. It was about me that's what You know really understanding that you know in leadership. You are the last point in the equation and don't get me wrong. You know there's an overlap of everything that happens, that we do so often times your phone, on the mission you're focused on the man and, of course, by doing that. Well, there is a positive impact for you and there's nothing wrong with that, but that

process. It should be, it should be by sequence, if you will not, because you're focused on you know, a hundred per cent and your right, the by product of focusing on your people, in focusing on your mission to byproduct of that, as you will be successful and the contrary to the contrary and situation is literally, if you focus on yourself instead of you, people in your mission, you will fail. You will you and you know, fails a strong word because, People in you- and I know one who have focused on themselves and they did they. They can win this I will make it witness fact about me when does tactical battle and they can get to a certain point, but eventually it will come back on them and you won't be yours. Truly success as if you would be, as you would have been had you focused on the men, the mission and not focused on yourself. I call those people leadership, wrecking boss, their good at their good at what they do. You know in some

precarious one of those people. He was very good at what he did and he got things done. But he had attended she to leave and a lot of Organizations have these individuals and keep them around because they do get things done, but they leave a path of destruction behind them and over time people don't want to work with them and that you know that's why on the leadership ragging ball. So I tell you, but you need to evaluate yourself. Are you one of those people? Do you turn around? You know forward. You look at the successive you have, but you turn around and look and there's a path of destruction wear away there. No doubt about it. All right, so you ve guys eventually do get back in the game. You, the pause, operational pause, gets lifted and you guys are operating again, and here you are out on an operation you're in an over watch position on a hill top going back to the book between bursts of gunfire. I heard him report troops in contact troops in contact we're facing at least twenty enemy fighters a wash.

Static, followed. Then I heard Joker add one of our afghan soldiers is wounded. We need reinforcements J. Here's your chance. Your teammates are in trouble. I looked down into the value thousand feet below the slope with steep, perhaps two degrees in places getting down. There would be a serious climb once at the bottom, We'd have to maneuver to the sound of the guns through broken terrain. Vegetation that would complicated you are guys without getting shot by accident. I'll do Fred and asked if the western over watch team still in place gunfire rapid over the radio, as he keyed is MIKE and answered. I think so. Ok, good night gave us eyes above and control of the high ground over there. This is the moment. J prove yourself as we dropped off Lip senior chief, curry called to me for the radio and wanted to know what I was doing, we're go

down, I told him he went ballistic. Absolutely not. We need to link backup fall back the boys needed help and we were closest if it had been anybody else. I might have thought twice about his call, but my own per no quest to prove myself, coupled with my intense hatred for him clouded my judgment, I ignored him and we pressed on as we dropped further into the valley. We lost all communication, with the headquarters team, began to realize what a hairy situation I'd just placed the two of us in we had given up the high ground to move down a thousand feet of vertical trying to try and link up with an element under fire with an enemy force, almost kilometers away. I push this thought. The back of my mind. The boys need help focus on that, but we was the fight. The sounds of idle echoed all across the valley, making it difficult to calculate distance and direction a broken Transmission filled. My earpiece I,

tell what it was, but I recognise J D voice. I tried to it which contact a moment later through washes of static, gaieties voice, came back where the hell are you J D demanded. I told him. We at the tea intersection. On the valley floor your ass out of the valley. Now he said with so much anger. I could almost feel a blast of fire shoot out of the earpiece. I was about explain my intent when he added, though guys we're in a major fight, and we can't call in closer support, because we don't know where you are that shook me. There were aircraft overhead waiting to join the bow with Rockets and bombs, yet they could not make their runs. Because of my decision to go into the valley. I should have thought about. Our air assets I was too blinded by my own ambition with my combat ex inexpert It's on full display. It started Donna me at last had I made a mistake. What, if somebody got hit during the delay, I'd caused? I

my radio and reported that we would be pulling out of the valley and climbing up the nor face the tea intersection to link up with our element. There. Once when consolidated on the North Ridge and our security was set for what would surely be a long night ahead. J D came looking for me, approached I could see he was live it. What the hell were you doing indignant I told him I was trying to go to the aid of my brothers. He looked at me like I spit on his wife. That was a stupid Then you did read you could have gotten people killed his words made me. Even or righteously indignant I fired backing. The boys were in trouble. I went to their aid, I did what needed to be done in the moment eighty refuse to accept that asked out a similar situation that occurred in Afghanistan a few years before, as if stably establishing precedence would help my case J d- with a mission to any cut me off with not the same at all. Read they didn't. Have our support available,

No, I know we ditch. I shouted back. You delete it with what you did J D roared at last when it was. Where to J G that his words were not sinking in. He ended the argument curtly said- will deal this. We after will get back to Kandahar. He turned and stalked off I watch him leave and struggled with my own thoughts. Had I really made that big of a mistake no no way I went to help when is that ever wrong Broke, that's a rough. You're, a lot of people read that section who don't have tactical background and they don't fully understand their like men, You did the heroic thing you. You went down into the battle. You know you try to take the fight to the enemy but no. I try to exploit them. You know you don't have a tactical Anderson,

in other, so many things that were done wrong there, that it literally, and this story would be so different if something it actually happen and the potential for something I've gone wrong is through the roof. I mean you been in Afghanistan, I mean no, the fighting positions and basically I took myself off a very advantageous high ground position that we owned down and the valley, a thousand feet below I mean there could have been hundreds of fighting positions in caves above me that any one single fighter could adjust decimated arson, You know what I been one thing if I got myself killed, but I pulled a young team guy Machine Gunnar down with me. So I place this guy's life in jeopardy and you know the funny thing is you know, I tried to pain it in that moment, arguing which eighty that I was doing the right thing. I'm taken the fight to the enemy. You know supporting my brothers and all this be

ass. The reality was, I want to get the fight at that point. I have been on the edge of a lot of firefly action in you know, and the even inviting them in until you get in there. You have proved yourself and I wanted for myself, I wonder, prove myself both as a seal as a fighter and as a leader, and this was another moment just like the general, where I thought. Here's my opportunity and arm and I was so unwilling to listen. You know that I had made a mist steak and the reality is vital owned it. At that moment, it probably would not have been as bad as it was but the mere fact that I just planted my flag on that spot and was like screw

you're wrong. I'm right- and I did the right thing I think, just turn. What was a fire into a raging inferno. Yeah yeah. I know that's, that's definitely rough and I think also from from a tactical perspective. People make mistakes like this like it can happen and it can happen and India. I talk about being able to detaching, that's something that I definitely learned in the you'll deems it was, I think one of the most advantageous skills for a leader, especially a combat leader, to have, is to be able to step back from the situation as it's unfolding, because you fully new, hey. We ve got air overhead and there in a firefight, and if I go down there, we will build a user sport. You wouldn't have done this even

in a sixty gunnar here. Even a pig, Gunnar would say. Ok, no, I need do. I need to let that that unfold, but you know your account, and get down there and and getting the fight is definitely at some. And that that can grab a hold of of anyone. If they're, not careful and in again So what we just talked about with you that moment. Put yourself. The head of the mission ahead of the team and and then yeah I mean this the of ownership, and- and you know when I, when I kick off the book- that I won't wave extreme ownership in old, kicks off with a blue blue, and you know it was a lot of bad things happening. There was a lot of moving parts going on, it was horrible situation, and iraqi soldier got killed several more got only one of my guys got wounded, and I can tell you right now, like

I think, if I would have said hey this, wasn't my fault blame it on someone else. I've I've I've got what I got fired about in about three seconds, because it a bit a bad situation, unfold and yeah- you when the flag on that is is rough and in I mean you're humility and put this out- there is awesome. People can learn so much from that, because if you recognize how easily you and you- ok- let's, let's, let's put paid you in a bad light that you young and you were but let's pain, when a good bye, even with you, had those qualities of being hyper aggressive and you want to get the fight in and you You a little bit arrogant, you're, still a team. I've been trying to do. A good job was like return, do bad job so recognize like hey, even if your well intentioned, if you don't pay attention to these things,. They can grab hold you and they can pull you no wrong direction and in you look up and in your view, your plan, your flag and

Put up your defences around and indefensible position, which is where you ended up here. And and you nailed it with the idea. You know something. I know you talk people about a business I talk about. I think it's no different problem fighting You know you ve got to let the battlefield developed. Sometimes we have this natural instinct that when something bad happens when a crisis happens, we feel this. You know, or my gotta get to react immediately before we actually too the time and even in a gunfight. You typically have a few seconds, san. It's amazing how much information we can process in a few seconds before we react and move, and that was one problem and the other problem, and you know I was I was driven by this relationship,

you and it's funny. You know the individual, the retired, ass chief, that you are worth on Thursday. Who was I served under him twice later? We had talked about that exact situation and he had given me advice later and he said never let your personal feelings get in the way of your professional relationships and I had an absolute and my personal feelings drive that, and that was probably the biggest nephew moment. You know like I said: if he'd been anybody else, but my hatred for him had grown to the point that I was just like the. Let me show you buddy, you know, and so all these things you know dangerous. You know that. Not only did you know. All these things, you have to be careful, I mean this is what falls under you know. A lot of people call these different things

my Pentagon at peak performance. I call it emotional leadership, so your ability to attach yourself for a second and say: okay, I'm not going to let my own personal feelings drive this, because, what's going on around me, my ability to lead and make the right decisions is more critical than what I feel and are. Obviously you know I have not learn those lessons yet I was on that one that glide path- and at this point I was on the glide crackdown- is crashing timber rough rough. Going back but back a Kandahar, I heard the first whispers about me floating around the team demanded nicknamed me Rambo Red, though some may think being compared to loans. Lone wolf, silver screen icon was compliment without. Community, it was a supreme insult in the seal teams, there's no room for individualism, The foundations of our success rest on mutual cooperation and communication alone wool like Rambo, could destroy a team with catastrophic effects on the battlefield.

After we debrief the mission gaiety Your sin took me into his mouth, Shift office and said read your operational ability have been called into question were sending you back, the bargaining, to meet with the seal and will discuss this further when the rest of the team gets back. I was stunned at worst. I was starting to expect something more than a risk slap, but nothing like that. I was being sent back to the rear out of combat. Nothing can ever be more humiliating for warrior. I try. My entire adult life. For this, and now I had been told I didn't measure up. I felt like a mule kicked the gut. I heard rumblings that senior chief carry wanted to see my trident taken away, behind the scenes. He was pushing for a trident review board to determine my fate. The month in fighting between us had bad enough now here.

Trying to destroy my career, I was sick at the thought of losing my tried and over a single bad moment in a valley whose name nobody back home would ever know and whose vocation would not matter to anyone. But a handful of men who had fought in it ends in red men had to set deadlines. Consistent pattern of bad decision making. I thought again. About my screaming match, with senior chief carry during the NATO exercised when it ended. What did I see in the eyes of What did I see in the eyes of my teammates embarrassment this wasn't really about one moment in the valley. Was it J? I had to face that fact. I rubbed my inking temples I felt like my head was going to explode from the pressure building inside of it. My life was being destroyed and I made myself vulnerable to these attacks with my own actions if I was allowed to continue to operate stories of this deployment.

Circulate through the teams. If I go to my People with my reputation in tatters, who follow my lead sitting neatly on the wooden cross Bar on the floor beside my bed, my whole stirred SIG Sauer or p two to six sat well oiled and cleaned I leaned over and pulled it out I knew around was already in the chamber, but I drew back the slide and took it to make sure we call the suppressed check? And it confirmed what I already knew my gun was ready to go as I held the pistol I thought of the great samurai warriors who, if disgraced emit ritual suicide. Part of willed my hand to raise the SIG to press it firmly to my Temple life is over. There's nothing left, but an honourable exit. I glanced over

the desk and saw a picture of my beautiful wife Erika the image of face riveted my attention, her easy, We smile her eyes a light I ve always de LA from offer, love and compassion. What would this due to her? After all, she'd sacrificed for me would my death snuff out the life of her gourd? his eyes with a bullet. I putting my temple I leave the burden of my failed career and a ticket to a lifetime of grief. The kids would live under that cloud as well You know it's addressing a lot of people who have not read my book, or maybe they have read it in their gloss over this, but they will

Wrong, we assume that my injuries and the ambush in the aftermath that ambush where the hardest thing I've ever been through and- and I tell him absolutely not by far the that moment- right there in that period of time. In my life about a that was about a four month period- maybe five months- that that journey, to the bottom, and I was almost at rock bottom at that point and this, is where Psychology of humans is an interesting thing because

All of us have that little voice that lives inside of us saw. I call mine, my demon and my demon has been my greatest pusher because he tells me what I can't do, and he also at times can be the most dangerous thing out there, because they will push you to do that. Wrong, it will push you to do things and tell you you can't do things in it was in that moment that I literally was listening to that that you know you will never recover. Even though you know your career is over now, there's no way you're going to come back from this. The guys are never going to follow you again. All these lies, These are lies that we tell ourselves- and I think it's really important- you know if there's anything about me. I tell people that item at. I am an expert on overcoming adversely failed.

Crisis and it doesn't matter how bad things have been. You always can recover. It goes back to those three rules of leadership. You just once again go back to leading yourself and in that moment, though, I was so crushed so crushed, because I had convinced myself that I had done the right thing and, and unfortunately I still believe that- and I just saw myself as a victim- victim, who had no way that I can recover and you know it shad in and you know you know, God moment that I glanced over cause don't think if, if I made a mistake or wherever I was not having pictures and my wife and kids right there, I probably would have done it cause. I just felt so hopeless and then I was ashamed honestly for thinking that and think about them.

Act. I would be borne them, so I'd love to see that was the catalyst of starting to climb out of that whole, but I actually continue to spiral down over the next couple of months until finally, you know my nor you know that moment occurred right after you know. My judgment had been set upon me, which really. I was very fortunate because I should have been grateful, cause really what they could Adonis said, you're out here, the worsening you The teams are to go before try to review born. They didn't. You know the ceo believed in me shit. You know you ve done a lot of great things. You ve had some amazing moments. You ve just you, you ve got some flaws, you ve got some arrogant flaws and you definitely we need to work on your decision making. Your ship abilities. So that's what they did. It's it's. You know that when I was reading this part B, it's it's gonna, be it's it's our only

think you could have, I think, a human being. I don't think you could expand. Think will Shakespeare could explain to Someone, that's not the teams, what it feels like to be the teams and to feel like- maybe that's not gonna, be your life anymore. That's right! men, and I don't think I mean you did your best and, like I said, I don't think it's just too to it. Splain enemy. I guess you do it because you explain listen. You are at a point where, if you couldn't be in the teams, you didn't want to be that's where you were out right there, and I guess that does explain it. I think it might be hard for people to relate to, but, like four p like you and me that literally whole adult life in the seal teams. I can't even imagine if at the in the in the

in the highlight of that moment of being deployed in combat you just last year, your comrades in arms, from your task unit, and to be told. Ok, you can't do this job anymore. I mean- like you said, and again. I think it can be hard for people understand that It seems like you, you would never want to you wouldn't want to live at all and then just add this onto what you're saying and I say this every time that I talk about this- kind of personal. Storms that people get into and I just got to say this in case someone hasn't heard me say before when you're in storm it seems like its goes forever. Direction Anyone on the outside would anyone. Ten feet away from. You would look at you and tell you you made some mistakes you need to. You need to get back on the horse. You need to get back out there. He was going to help you get fixed. It will get you back, but when we're every direction you look is black and you think you're not getting

and team guys don't play around either all going. Back to the book. I you so you decide. Ok, I'm unlimited ominous: stick it out you on your way back. I made my way my way back to my hooch when entered our living quarters. I walked by our message board and saw note scrawled next to my name. Why don't you I hadn't kill yourself The words rather know how long the hallway was empty. Nobody had been standing around waiting to see my reaction. That's Gus, there's no mercy in a sealed to theirs you know I'm of often thought about that, and you know the deal. We have incredibly dark, humor, so wonder, was somebody just trying to in the mood and kind of shock me into a dude. Come out of it, you don't go fuck yourself, I've always I have often wondered where were they serious and just like dude, you are a disgrace, you we don't and- and I know for a fact mean there was

A point right before we left on that deployment couple weeks later, where you know guys would be an divvied up into where there were going neck. So next patterns leadership and they were ass. You know who? Who do you want to work with? You know who do you want to work under an and they unequivocally row? We don't want to work with bread. So this was an additional blow that really kind of reinforced. Hey man, you you knew you some are you have work to do. Except I'll be honest. I wasn't at that point. There, you still at rock bottom. You know you talk about the storms, I talk about life ambush. And this was a major life ambush, one of the first major life ambushes, I'd ever encountered and I literally was on the axe taking withering fire and I couldn't figure out how to get out of it, and you will do your best.

Return fire with your pistol. In this case I was gonna return one round and I was going to fix things on the ongoing vomited on right. I'm going to maintain this position right here and I'm gonna win. No actually you're, not you need If you need to look around, you need maneuver, so you do end up keeping your trident because, obviously there were some guys that debt believed, like you said, believe the new and sir that you had the potential. Actually, sometimes people ask me what what makes a guy get fired or knock fired, and for me it's like- one hundred percent, if the guy black humility, they're, gonna, get fired or even if they, if no one, if I would see a guy that had no humility whatsoever and an agency, a crack it be like this guy's a lost cause, he's never listening what you can't coach someone it lacks humility completely, so or you can help the baby there- sit in on the axe and just get shot up. That's the way it's gonna be

So somebody saw that hey we can get through to this guy. You know he's a good team guy and, more importantly, to that point- and this is a great leadership point- an organizational point not only- they're going to sit there and take those hits, because there too arrogant to be willing to move they're gonna pull everybody else down with them and that's where it gets really dangerous. Especially in our community, were lives are on the line. I mean it there are unwilling to learn or humble themselves enough. They're gonna get somebody else killed, and that was to be concerned at that we had man, I've gotta, give kudos to my commanding officer who is a friend to this day he say my career, because I wasn't exhibiting humility. I was fighting back. I was. I did. The right thing on the victim here, it I'm just being thrown under the boss and thankfully he had enough faith in me. I guess he had seen enough good that he said I think we can fix him. Don't

good man and one of the things that they do to fix. You in the seal teams is send you to arrange your school wonderful vacation whereby, as you and I would say, there is a small is this: some people go to arranged spoke. They go to arrange school right on, but often times, and this you'll teams, Ranger School and I would even call it punishment, but it's the reeducation and there. Definitely something that has always been and that's what they do with you. Ok, They're going send you to a really tough training school, where it's not just to top training school. We get weeded out. You learn to tactics, you learn to you learn leadership and I not arrange school, but you know it great go everyone. I know that the Rangers that an hour awesome guys so great school, but oftentimes, we use this you'll teams. Maybe punishment is the wrong word. In some cases. I know it's been punishment. Ok, You guys want to go there, but

finally guys Demi, generally geyser working, so I'm not going arrange a school you and getting the ranger school, and here we go sick, hungry burning with resentment because, as you said, you're, not you at this point. You're still like all this is this. This is crap. I don't deserve this now. I wish to say I was bitter, is an understatement: burning with resentment. I went to the first few days with without my heart or mine, engaged the first week of Ranger schools, nothing, but it got check long days of minimal sleep exposure, the elements and constant physical and mental evolutions to get those who don't want to be there to quit. Work leadership within a circle of peers and decision making under stressful conditions, where the objective of this first phase as a seal, I should have represented my community in the best possible manner, while by playing leadership, a commitment to teamwork and a willingness to overcome obstacles. Instead,

action showed me to be arrogant, ill tempered and unwilling to work with others. Many soldiers falsely believe that seals or like that in my actions we simply reinforced it. I failed to represent my community as anything, but that stereo type. So you have this ban attitude. You go out on a compass course you're, pretty good at land nab, you think you're gonna kick ass. You don't kick ass. You do a bad job, the black cats, who were the ranger instructors. Here we go the black hats cha laughter, damn squid got lost. We should give me boats, Wabi another growled, not surprising seals known how to navigate anyways failed it something. I once took great pride in not so good. Without your gucci gear Aria, another sneered I lost it all. My pen took fury frost out of me. Screwed course and screw you kiss my ass. I walked up to my company instructor told them about it. Here I quit are you

What to do that without thinking. I said yes I was reading this book hours like day. I was thinking jail I mean who holy shit talk about a total breakdown of emotional leadership. I mean that's, u reality. I died and here's a problem with that Ireland, this to happen by not managing myself. I am alive this I was like a pressure cooker waiting the mob off, and instead of manage recognising that come to grips with it, I didn't in it it just manifested itself in that moment where I feel the land, of course, because of me, arrogance, and then you know

those ranger instructors to get under my skin and that failure instead of immediately sand. Well, hey no big deal. I could have gone back and done it again like three days later preserve. I wasn't the only guy that fail or other guys fail, but instead of that I insist, we just it one additional below that I had sustain and being at this tipping point, you know allowed them to get under my skin and snapped, and it is the only thing I have ever quit in my life tat. I have verbally quit, I mean, for all intents and purposes, I rang the bell and that moment and So angry and frustrated and listened to that demon. That said your career is over. You will never recover from this This is the final straw. You know you had an opportunity in your missed it man so you know, nobody's ever gonna, follow you again yeah and everyone screwed you over and put you in this point absolutely That's why I victim victim victim mentality now this is a miracle.

This is a miracle is like it's God moment had I people don't understand this. This is a miracle, the colonel in charge of Ranger School happens to be friends with and Peter who you are. Talked about earlier and that's not his real name, but he's a legendary seal officer and a prior Vietnam, Marine battle away city by the way, just a just an awesome guy, and for Whatever reason miracle colonel that's in charge of ranger school. Friends with with Captain Peterson. And here we go going back to the book you're sitting there talking of the colonel Vince, Peters, was the greatest natural leader at ever known. He had a nap expressing where the team needed to go with just A few words heed seeds like his men taking ownership of the plan. Then why is everything went forward with the plants?

when the plan succeeded it almost always. Did he never took the credit he gave it to everyone else in Wretch Retrospect. I am not proud that all I could man It was the feeble- and this goes back to something you talk about earlier in the book, but at this point, still unable to face the truth, myself, let alone admitted to the leader I respected, above all, others and so here you go your conversation with Captain Vince Petersen Red. Do you really think Ranger School as punishment? It is Sir red. Have you ever thought that maybe there is an opportunity here, sir, You have a chance to learn something of value if you're willing to take it. I didn't know what to say to that: I had not been trying to learn anything since Afghanistan. I've been trying to defend and justify you're getting ready to throw your career away, read much I have a career left, sir red hair. Firmly? What are you gonna do

If you get out if you come, you'll be out of the navy in a month. How are you going to pour your family. He let that sink in. I had no answer and stayed silent besides, you really want to go through your life. Having ended your career, this way you can recover You control your destiny and your future. You can earn back the respect. The guy's if you give them something to respect. If your actions demand respect, I hadn't looked at it. My situation from that angle, red get back in. That course finish. It then come. With your head held high and show that you have the ability to lead that leave a mark yeah well and for people to understand. I I didn't sleep, a wink that night after I after I quit

and I was so ashamed of what I have done, and I was so convinced that there was no way I could undo it- that I literally was just resigned to the fact that my career was and when I went into that office I first spoken sergeant major in the sergeant major asked. If I wanted to treat anybody in the seal team hell, no man, I don't want to talk to anybody. You know I am the failure, I am, they don't broken and and then it was the colonel who asked me, and I said impact, so the mere fact- and this is he didn't even off- he just started dialing so that in the mere fact you talk about this big moment that that Vince Petersen will happen to be at his phone an answer right then and and the same on the phone and him to hand it to me, and there was no way in Hell. I mean I had such respect for this. This man there's no way, I could say no,

and you know that conversation you know this is this- is the highest levels of leadership to be able to quickly. Why is the situation, especially when you're working with people to understand you know? Okay, this is where we're at this is the battlefield I'm looking at. This is what I have to work with, and this is what I need to do to move this person to where we're going, to motivate and inspire them, and I mean he did it fall you know exactly what to tell me. He told me both the good and the bad. He gave me hope and ITALY, what happens if you dont, which would be hopeless? You know I will have you out of military in less than a month and then You know I tell people that is the most sington, powerful leadership advice. I've ever been given. You know people will follow you if you give them a reason to a few, give them something to respect, and that really is the foundation of you know the three rules of leadership. I talked about lead yourself that the eighty percent of it you know leading others

naturally, and he was right because, however, that office and the funny thing about it, always I got off the phone, and I ask the colonel, I said, Sir, which put me back in class and you to be now you said. Instead, you will go to the holding company and we will class you up with a new class a month later, which- just what you need. Did you get rolled back for thirty days gone back to the book I bent down and picked up the cigarette bought lying in the grass at my feet with afflict the but spun the garbage bag had been dragging cross post with me. So here you are bat seal officer picking up cigarette by thirteen years in thirteen years in as I My bag with litter, the bit bitterness flared again. I've put thirteen output in thirteen and a half

years. I was a member of one of the most elite special operations units in modern history. Millions of dollars were spent preparing the training me outfitting you to handle the toughest battlefield a star nation can face, and my own brother's at reduced me to this. I stopped and thought about that statement. Where was the personal responsibility in it? Vince Peterson's word came back to me You have an opportunity to learn here if you're willing to take it. I served with good men whom I respect it. They turned their backs on me or did they? What did all this say about? Me. A door suddenly opened in my mind the place it led to was a dark room that I had never entered inside I could see the truth about myself from the facade Of lies, I built I stood at its threshold, not really wanting to walk through

Sun Tzu once said. If you know your enemies, and you know yourself, you will never be defeated. I didn't know myself. I was running blindly through life. Refusing to even acknowledge might weaknesses. I have been an arrogant ass, most of my career. Clearly, I needed to come down to earth may be trash detailed did serve a purpose. After all, I guess I needed to mentally flat line before I could weaken struck my self for leadership. I found another cigarette button inflicted into my bag. The bitterness we're being forced into this sort of work, evaporated far from a humiliating burden, he was giving me clear The I surely needed for years, attitude at hobbled relationships and endangered my career. I suddenly recalled a moment years before. I'd worked my tail off for months on a special project when I finished it,

I knew I was going to receive a significant award for the effort, for whatever reason it got downgraded to a lesser award. What did you do it? you found out, I thrown a temper tantrum. I went off on one of our admin, guys who congratulated me after I received it being grateful receiving any sort of acknowledgement. From the awarded him I might have throw it in the face of Captain Petersen, who was my c o at the time that incidents with my peers, who witnessed it and for you. After when I ran into one of them, they'd remind me of it: Jason Redman Navy Achievement Metal, thrower, Vanguard of leadership. I can't say I look forward picking up trash the next morning, but I didn't start the day despising. What would come next I was ashamed that I'd have fought so highly of myself, but I saw myself as above picking up trash.

I realise that as a seal leader, it was my responsibility to accept the example with everything I undertook there. You go Here you go, it was you know, so this is probably the point and not to a lot of people about this. Like I wish, I could say that after I hung up the phone with Captain Petersen that I went back and was like Yeah, let's go: let's do this, you know let's crossness and instead I still was kind finishing I we. I was on that sloped down a crash that plane and I I will crash that plane and hit really them the bottom of the barrel and- and it was at that point, I really start analyzed. My shall not so much talk to a lot of people about it. Are you truly afternoon yours,

you can not, because our weaknesses manifested themselves in the hardest times. They don't come out in the good times in the good times, is no issues with it. The only way you can manage that you know is to mental leadership and an emotional leadership at the highest level, because in the hardest times, and usually those times you gotta be managing most is when it comes up, and it was by really starting to rip myself apart and look at you know all these things had I done and understanding oh yeah. When I get into these situations, I feel that you know that that melt down with the ranger instructor shit, I felt that coming along I gotta but I didn't I let it go, they live the fuse and instead of taking it out, I let it burn and blow up. So it was. You know. Really. It was these moments, and this is probably the biggest

thing that I can tell anybody out there. It is never too late. You can always come back. Chauffeur for months. I had convince myself tat. I was a victim for months. I convince myself. There was no way to do this and for the first time when I finally looked at you know these you weaknesses, but oh by the way- and you get, amazing strengths, and you know you need to figure out how to amplify these drinks, minimizes weaknesses and Wouldn'T- opportunity. You have. You are a seal. That's in Ranger school that can crush this course set the example and combat every day is another opportunity here, screw up again and natural K, but you know so for the first time I saw hope stand at the rock bottom and looking up through this tunnel, I saw a glimmer of light. Will what's when, when you say that what I think about is what people get themselves

into the box themselves into this scenario in its exactly where you had box yourself into which was hey, look This guy doesn't like me this guy's blame me for that. This. These people have a bad attitude and you're in and guess what other people you can't control and Oh, you end up in a hopeless situation cause. I can't change this guy's attitude he's an asshole. He doesn't like me. He Whatever we had a running this person, they don't me, and I can't change that and oh, when you're, in a situation where you can't change the situation at all, because you don't have control over any of it. Well, then guess what you're hopeless, but the minute you look at yourself. And you say: wait a second. I actually control everything. That's going on right now, every think people's perception of me is based my behaviour, not theirs, and that's all That's what I liked. What up what Petersen said you

you control your destiny in your future. That's did that. To me I highlighted that ninety eight times control your destiny in your future and added point in the book is where you saw and it took you picking up cigarette butts in turkey point we say wait a second all. Things that have happened to me. I can get control of them and I can turn them into better direction and yeah That's us and the journey began. Yeah that you can expand a little bit more here I could not. I could not change my decision, but I shouldn't you're talking about this when you're talking about your reflecting now on what happened on your decision to go into the valley in Afghanistan that whole scenario that you got trouble for. Here's what? said about. I could not change my decision, but I should owned it in its. Aftermath

listen to those with more experience taken my lumps and moved forward. That is how leaders grow I was so desperate to justify it and defend my actions. I lost sight of what to do when I was there to do. I was there to lead when necessary, to follow and called upon, but, above all to accomplish the mission is part of a team. Instead in the aftermath I made it all about me, and the defence of my ego Again, when you come into the office and say this wasn't my fault, I was doing the right thing. Every one that's looking at you is thinking he's. He doesn't even see what he did wrong and that's where you talk about in this book it about the fact that one of the most the most horrible things on the battlefield is an arrogant young person that thinks there's this marking listening one and you when you sit there and put up your defences, you're sure when everyone that the book. Yes, your chief curry hated me. We love each other, but the truth. He was

damn good operator in a fire fight, I would have wondered if there is a tactical leader in his own abrasive way. He attempted mentor me. If I put down my pride, I would have seen it and I would have learned a lot from him that never have and I failed to manage our relationship and poisoned the entire put to it. Also hurt my reputation with my teammates myself to deceit. Finally, lapsed. Carry had not done this to me. I don't miss all to myself. I was being punished for the decision I made and more for the way I'd fiercely refused to take responsibility for it. The more I rail against those aligned against me. The more I deserve to be punished. I wasn't betrayed by my teammates. I betrayed them with my selfishness. It was time to grow up Dale.

The other was exciting because it suddenly Ranger School suddenly became a new opportunity and really I shut my sites on Euro kind. Interestingly enough, I think all of us are super gold ribbon people and for the first time I saw an opportunity and I and set a goal. You know me, which is what I think all of us do so well. As you know, we we have a target to move to, and now I have a path to go after it and that path became. I wanna graduate the honor man this course and such set the worker. The next morning fired up the guys around me and I mean we're getting ready to start up again. It's gotta be awesome. Let's go do this there again Harper on us, little bit, but just the fact that this book so powerful because due to two. Walk through that Europe is now tell you anybody, that's red, extreme ownership, but when

listen. This park asked is going to be bash we there would it be. I haven't even deeper understanding as the day I talk about this all the time and to see you, down that path, see where it leads and then be able to come back. Albino come back out is awesome, but but it so powerful to actual we hear from your purse, active from some one. That was in that exact position and doing those things. Hear you saying it and be able to work, miss the turnaround, its powerful, powerful, next morning. I hit the ground running and never look back or company I joined was full of strangers no matter. I did everything full boar, make sure I help but make sure I help everyone in my squad, whenever I could, I was going to be this I was not going to be the disconnected selfish jerk. I had been this go around. My heart was fully invested and you

kick ass great, a school you're, not honour man, because you find out that the I only find out at the very end that if your rolled back you're not eligible, why didn't really was ranked at the top of my Pirie bows him in all the instructors game erratic man, you're, dirges, crushing and So, no matter where there was a goal. You now that another great guy earned it and well deserved. You end up back. The book back, the teams, you go back to a task unit and you're in a systematic manner. Yet again is a real role, as is a free rein. Reload as a symptom commander. We still just super junior cause, you receive an animal back No, I had just may Gigi at this point then we still, you know now they're kind of doing it. Definitely a lot of us seem admiral guys do to have the ability to do two parts they made me. Do about Julia. They wanted me to do two parts, and this is an aim for those who are not aware there was a

a bit of impetus on me because they. Basically, she was officers. If you ever get a letter of reprimand in your record and effectively end your career, I mean, if it official letter, goes into your record. You're done you'll. Never you won't make it back you're gonna be out, and they basically wrote this letter. My outgoing she, who was in Afghanistan to my incoming seo, who has taken over the team, and they basically said you made some mistakes and we question your tactical decision making and leadership abilities, but we're going to give you a second chance so This letter and I was united in the office with the ceo and he put it into his safe, basically said. This will be burned shredded at the end of the deployment. If you show us, you have the ability- and if you don't it will go, your per and they had him. I also record right there and they were like it will go right here and to record so

and I think they knew the power that also gave me additional momentum. Think this is important and leadership. You know In the same way, we raise our kids there's gotta be accountability. Uk, just tell somebody hey this, where I want you to go out and do we have to let it lay the right and left limits and tell them. This is where you're gonna go, and you have to have those things that hold you accountable. So I dont know by necessarily need Did that I was pre fired up on on wanting to get back and set the example. I redeem myself. But I will say on the back of my mind, I knew a man. Do you gotta you got a crash here. That's it that's a antonov, that's happens. All the military, but in the seal teams. There's there's a lot of letters that get shredded and part of it is like a cover. Your ask when I was a commander, of its cover, your ass because hey look, you screwed up and

you screw up again, and everyone knows that this happened multiple times and you haven't been council about it. I look like an idiot, and now do I look like an idiot. I Amity, if I'm not document, and that you screwed something up Solomon Doc, at this end, make sure that you know I've got a documented, but by the I'm not trying to kill your career. If you can turn around and get back on the path cool, the sings going, the shredder, but here it is gotta get some way to go before this thing goes in that shredder to spread, Thing in the ceilings not to common, but I'm sorry in its ask unit, a system between commander and things. Going good and you you were, What more self aware and again, to read the whole book to get all these details about that transition. You a lot more self aware, and you started off as mobility commander and then eventually start working with us team, and here we go

The book after that, first successful mission on the assault T might earned a spot in the mix and harmonised with the task in its battle, where the marble tunes rotated back and forth between running mobility, or running the assault force. The pace was intense and the mission start to blend together in a ground hog day, stored away. I may have lost my way years ago, but through God and a willingness to work hard and or my strengths and weaknesses, IDA earned my way back into the brotherhood and you details some Some good missions. Some pretty hot missions. You know you guys got some pretty good gunfights and your towards the end deployment and your two. You commander. He's here. You have a conversation with him and he says we're gonna. Have you run as ground force commander on the next one for second, what this really meant failed to register really J P in the day,

at this point in the book. J P is a guy he's your task in a commander jape nodded. He I spoke to Eric and Paul and we all agree you're ready for, besides, as a help, get you up to speed to be up to commander at thanks. I finally answered that's awesome. Faced with the opportunity you earned it broke, he turned to leave. I had done it my career back on track at last you saw me in our community would always hate me for my mistakes, but I learned the trust to the men. I served and fought with since two thousand. For I been an officer within our community rank, does not automatically make you a leader. Your character makes you a leader. Your actions make you a leader rank is almost irrelevant. After years of selfish focus on myself, I'd find the understood what it meant to lean Med, led men of this caliber, and why- was required of a man in order to be part of this most elite of all fraternities The letter in the safe would be destroyed for an instant. The horizon ahead held no bound

Greece, and again I skipped this was not like an easy process. Man, you work your way right back up, you started with small jobs. You made some mistakes that you either you Utah about the you lay you raised, the re run matrimonial and he was not happy, not happy. So looked story you're doing Deak Infliction and you can identify, and so you escalate to be conflicts into a visible laser and and you know they realising that both sides were friendly's and it was a marine corps colonel that you are lazy. He wasn't too happy about that and when you win win here, commander brought you and instead hey what the hell happened. You took ownership of it and said: hey. Here's mistakes are made instead of blaming everyone else. So big big turning point and I think this important point you know you you know I mean within

community. It's pretty hard to turn around when you ve made a major mistake. Like tat I mean. You guys get out. We that guys shadow have been sent to the fleet some never come back and then some come back and redeem themselves, but can me and some just get put into. Ostracised position of low importance inside the seal teams right and it's like okochee up. We eat you, oh yeah, your station over there. Yet we know what you're doing and we know all about you in and we get that used to Have you tried in and you're still considered a seal but you're, not a team guy, and we no that yeah no, you will not be invited to go back to an operational, real, your relegated to training, and, although you no other things

I mean it really is, for people to understand them in our community is driven by amazingly talented warriors and, at the end of the day, the leader they rely on the guy's next to them and their leaders to make those good decision. So, if you bait bad decisions need to be able to come back in them, say: ok, you know you ve shown us that we can trust you once again to lead me the right decision. So really I tell people is the hardest road. I've ever walked me when I got wounded us like via appear. The the trust when broken. Is it dreamily hard to rebuild, and I get asked a lot. How do you build trust with people either? It's been broken or whether you don't moment and it's very clear, the book and again this is why people get the book the way that your task I'm trying to think the alias, because I known to J P,

the way that your task in the commanders very common to what a guy does. He gives you a little bit of responsibility and lets you let you earn a little bit of trust and then, once you ve heard, a little interest gives you a little bit more responsibility. Once you ve earned a little bit more trust and that continue going. This is this is now a six month appointed plus a year, long work up or whatever keys, been giving you a little bit of trust in you been earning an earning, an earning, an earning back, your trust in your digging out of the deficit right, that's a lot harder, so that is a lot harder when, if you What is new guy you're like a zero right because p, then you're gonna get a little trust and maybe get to appoint two, and then you get a little bit more responsibility. We get to a point for you like a negative nine, and so you had just what you do on the way back to get to zero. And then, once you read zero than you had to build up and at this point in the book, can you did some again? I'm sorry, I'm not gonna go into everything, but you knew you had a pretty dynamic potential

horrible situation, unfolding big gunfight goin on some head now not accounted for people, and you took the situation in that probably is what Reno jumped up a bunch of levels in people going. Ok, you know what we can trust the sky and and you continued. These did to build that trust and up to them Where, and I need to explain, because I didn't up to the point where the task Commander said: okay, one of next coming missions. Where you make, the ground force commander and what that means for civilians is. That means you are in charge of everything. You're gonna go out you're going to this the main leader. The senior leader name in the main. They give me the senior leader ii guy in charge of everything that's happening on the battlefield, that's what the ground force commander is and you're now being the end of the plug, your being told look you gave me want you to the ground force commander on one of these upcoming operations, and that is

the ultimate trust for someone to give to a subordinate is hey. I want you to go out and. My job, that I would normally do you go? Do it so pretty amazing, come back humbly familiar so. You're almost at the end of deployment and a lack of unhappy comes up, We are one week away the up, wonder why we want hack enough to get ready to go home. No to self those last operations be careful. For first and last, and the first miss aging. Alas, once gets you in its The commission comes out. It's one of those missions where you gotta come, like has probably isn't gonna go down its sketchy entail high visibility? If it goes in your thinking, because we get a lot of those you owe this. Happen and you get used to getting all ample

and eventually don't even getting up anymore. You continue with your day the routine, go the gym work out whatever, and this particular case You guys you, you literally went to the jam you workin out like normal, and I think there was a chance in Hell. This mission was going to happen and some of the guys were looking at it, but I just didn't think it was going to have it was already late, so we were outside really the window. You know to really try and execute in are there any good manner in my opinion, and then there were external things. You know there's some class by factors to it that I don't talk about in the book where it, which were other some of the really big reasons why I did not think there was any chance. This was going to happen but but it does and you guys rollout honour, be no Al Qaeda target and Definitely you guys had the intel that bad guys expected security team expect enemy security, team expected and again

like we would hear that alot I mean it's not like it's not like. Oh this entails a hundred per cent and you're, not do anything different. They tell you, there's a security, the enemy security team you're, like ok Jack. We ve heard that twenty seven times I've only been there, however many times, and so you always always expect it. They had there was a little more detailed information about this truly detail that made it a little bit harrier than some of our regular missions. I mean there are things we knew

Yeah, I can't remember the day I came into the disease and on basic more solid into absolutely so it made it a little bit different kind of raised our hackles so little more than normal, but you know the process of the mission is the same. I mean I know. Probably you talk to other people, you know the guys. Did the Bin Laden Raid, the mechanics of that mission were the same. It was just the level you know how we take down. The target is pretty much the same, regardless of where you go, and it was the same for this case. There were just some things. The scale. Maybe we should prepare a little more. You guys, role on the target and things get pretty pretty intense, pretty quick. Once you ve once you ve hit the target, you ve got it cured now, we got some supporters meetings and folks that we think of run away from the target building again

we're going to the full details of the mission which you did a beautiful job of explaining what this was like in the book and that's why he was good books. They can read it but, as we mentioned earlier, this ends up in a firefight and you're in it going back book, I keep my radio called J P troops in contact troops in contact. I have three wounded, including me, the machine we're still blazing away at us and they walk there, barrels right and left. Crossing our positions with hundreds of seven point, six to millimeter bullets. Irene denies that if I didn't get a tourniquet on what I thought was the stump of my left arm, I was going to bleed out. I looked back at our and the rest, my team behind the tire right there our saw me gets my feet in turn. Run to join them out on me this later, but I have no recollection recollection of standing up after hours hit the first time the p game Gunnar, spotted me moving and laid on his trigger. According to our I'd, only taken a step or two in my head whips

odd forward in my body spun round to the left, I fell linked to the ground. The team thought I'd been killed. I recognise the dire situation we ran and called in an immediate fire mission. The easy one, thirty crude turned it down The first type two times before finally made Our acknowledge that, if anything happened to us, it was asphalt fault, not the gun, ships. The first If I'd millimeter shells hit the thicket behind the enemy, I less than fifty feet from the enemy machine gun. That engaged me. I D in and out of consciousness, the entire time awake enough. Of confusion, one minute out cold, the next I'll risked his life to save me during a lull and fire, he rose from behind the tyrant charged over me shortly, cover fire, as our ran into the teeth of that p M bullets acting with wind around him. But he reached me a drag me back behind the tyre where he put a turn get on my mangled arm

I remember nothing of this and I didn't know I'll, even moved me too. The tire until months after the fire fight them the vat bird arrived a few minutes later and the guys help the board once we, airborne and out of harm's way the remainder of the task, and it fell back to the original target compound to wait for extract. But the fight was over. The gunshot gunship detected more movement in the thicket enough was AL called in one o five millimeter howitzer from eighty one thirty and turned the thicket into a smoking. Crater and later when J peed visit me at home. I learned that the Al Qaeda commander had fled the house when he heard our birds coming at the start of the mission he left party personal security detail behind to fight a battle. He had no stomach for himself and they die To the last man, after inflicting three casualties on US months later Another seal team ran the Elk

commander to the ground and killed him justice served so that firefight again people should should read the book to get the details of that firefight, but I just reading about you wounded, which I've come that part and now you're up and run, get shot face and down ever be your guys think you're dead. And- and you know, I should cover this with a little bit more detail, but you know you're trying to make calls you're trying to let people know. What's going on your China, decipher the situation, because it was a rough situation that you guys were in and you end up. You know, get and extracted.

Your boys, to carry the dead, I owe my life to those guys. They fought back that gun If overhead in a forest, I shall operation squadron. I want my life to those guys that was the closest far mission ever in the Iraq war. We were well Well, they wouldn't bring in that mission because we were, we were literally within any danger: crow, close parameter, their war machine guns. You had me pinned down we're about forty five feet feet away. So our did an amazing job. I mean this was his third combat appointment, experienced J tack, experience, team leader and you know really- I mean he hung it all out their exposed himself to get me say my life with my turn, a kid and the rest, guys know fought amazingly to get us out of there and get off the axe and survive and

yeah. I want it all to get a Navy cross. They they downgraded it to a silverstar. This day, then I'll tell anyone he deserved Navy cross, but all those guys did an amazing job. I owe my life my life to them and on ship. It's an obviously you know in the beginning the book. You know the thought that I had lost my arm and what tat what happened is. Actually, I guess my arm was pinned under me. So when I reach for it, I couldn't feel it. You know what you stand, all my nerves. There was an earth damage to right, yeah yeah. So when when, in this is kind of an interesting point, that I talk to people about and something I'm speaking on all the time now, this idea of surviving

so having training their career. When we where we learn how to execute ruthless and devastating violence of action in an ambush to crush the enemy and destroy the enemy in that kill zone on the axe and two now, beyond the flip side of that coin and be in a very well executed ambush coming, they had ass, it was now ambush, they had us caught very good crossfire. Ah, you know, and just sheer well for us to fight and at least not push back off that gave us a window and and by the in sheer. We wish you luck that there happen to be that tractor tire back there at least one point to cover, because beyond that there was nothing but thousands of yards of open iraqi desert, but to be in that ambush

that devastating and withering cross fire, I stepped out of that ambush into another ambush in the next day. A Bush was what I call a life ambush. Suddenly, here I was, I had been on this amazing journey of failure, growth, understanding gaining experiencing wisdom in redemption, and you know career back on track, getting ready to screen and go over to the next level. She'll team was my goal when I came back from that point- and I was doing that and suddenly to find myself laying in a hospital bed so weak? I need a nurse's to help me go to the bathroom from the amount of blood loss. I had the very first thing I woke to was the doctors telling me most likely they were going to have to amputate my

I had no use of my hand. I had not seen myself in the mirror my face was totally born apart. I lost my nose cheekbone my eye, my bitten, the bullet travelled, the bullet hit me right and from the ear travelled through my face and exited the right side of my nose, took off most of my nose and took out most of my cheek born it vaporize my orbital floor. Do my eye actually drop down into the new found pool. In my face to a damaged my eye, muscles broke all the bones above my eye and shattered. My jaw broke my jaw to my chin. So. I have not seen myself laying in the hospital bed and I'll be honest. I was, I wasn't ready to look at myself. I knew I had tubes coming out of everywhere. I was tricked. I was wired shot at a stomach. Tube

they were feeding me so I stepped into this next ambush. I was you know with this thought of. Where do I go from here and I'll be on us for the first couple of days I kind of struggled, and I think this is natural. So we talk about this idea being pinned down on the axe, and how we have to survive in it's a real world ambush or it's a life ambush for anyone. That's out there that's encountered some sort of devastating about tonight, classed by life, ambushes, an event that on forever leave fiscal, mental or emotional scars on you, you have to get off the axe. So I'm way and there in this hospital bed- and unlike kick him myself on my cadmium, what if I had it You do the things that humans do when bad things happen. We start to think well what, if I done Nasser what if I had done matter, What if I could go back and change this fact and I thought I did- that for probably no thirty six hours after I got a Bethesda

just kind of lost in my mind, think about it and at one point I just said: stop it go back and change the pass. Man what's happened to happen the thing you can do is shape the future. Thought back to that journey that I had been on from grounds euro from that broken man in Afghanistan ready to kill myself to where I had come, and I shall do only thing you can do from here a shape the future so get off the axe and go, and I never look back from that point and I tell you that. You know you have to push yourself into those zones discomfort so that you can handle these hard situations when they come, because if you ve never forge yourself, if you ve never been put into these raise the discomfort. You're gonna be crushed when they come because you're not going to be ready I was so ready for that moment when it came a mean enough, took me about them,

six hours after I got home to figure it out, but still that's pretty quick for a devastating injury like that and I never look back year. You, in Bethesda and just just a kind of. But give a little bit of detail around that you got some doctored name female doctors, doctrinal barred, and here we go back to book kind but she's about the last year can situation that you're in with energy bluntness, she laid out the extent of my wounds. The machine gun bullet entered just in front of my right ear shattered my job vaporized, my right or borough floor destroyed. My cheek and exit through my nose at suffered nerve damage as well. Virtually nothing Well, my cheekbone or occupied for both on the right side of my face. She team was amazed. I didn't suffer greater, I damage, so that was a blessing my nose was almost completely destroyed and we need a full reconstruction they need Repair my shattered jaw implanted titanium plate to replace the ocular floor and would have

to repair the damage to the rest of my facial bones on the right side, I still under the impression they could fix me right up and get me back into the teams, not not now. I was not so sure, and you at this point your jaws shot in your tricks. You can't talk to you right out a note. How many weeks are we looking at here doc weeks she had surprised, know J we're talking years a few years. At least years it didn't even sinking at first. There would be progressive surgeries? Each one will need to be fully healed before we can move on to the next one. She went on to explain that there was no road map for the extent of than because of an ex then, and nature of my wounds, my case highly complex and I would recall, require extensive bone and skin graphs in the years ahead. After

she left. I struggled to keep my spirits up. This was news. I did not want to hear. Yeah. You know this interesting fact. I you know Talk to a lot of other team guys about this, I think a lot of us. We do a really good job and seal teams, and it I'd like to assume other military units do. The same do really good job of preparing guys if they get killed. You know page too, we make sure they're all take care of I don't think any of us ever give much thought I sure didn't. If I was severely wounded. I think most of us think one side of the coin is, she know, it'll, be merely merely a flesh wound on away will get back and then the other side of the coin is I'll be killed, and I was good with either those I'd just kind of resign myself to that fact show was a whole

other thing to be severely wounded and be faced with this fact that you may be forever disabled and it was tough for you and hears you run into this situation. Going back the book one afternoon to family members came to visit us Erika, took the opportunity to step out, grab, grab some lunch self. I talk with them for a bit which left which quickly fatigue, started drift off before I even realized it. Why- Was dozing I heard them whispering to each other. I only got Frank so the conversation, but it was enough. They were full of pity for me Erica returned and my relatives departed. I wrote down. All tat had happened recount yet sent me into a fury again. I tore off the sheet of paper and handed it to her than I thought for a minute and added never again never again with someone seals feel sorry for me. I followed, my country, in our fight to regain my health, so I will ultimately be able to return to our nations battlefields. I was

here for sympathy. I was here recover to be alive. Or to set an example of mental fortitude. It would be all too easy to give up into despair, but I refused There were men and women in this complex who were far more badly wounded than I was missing limbs burned. Suffering brain trauma or eyesight loss. I would be Grateful for what I had determine to succeed in the days ahead and when you use these principles, I learned over the last two years to guide me forward. I wrote a note to all my visitors and asked Erika to hang it up on the door. Then here's what the note said attention to all who enter here. You are coming into this room with sorrow or to feel sorry for my wounds. Go elsewhere. The wounds I received, I got a job. I love doing. It People I love supporting the freedom of a country. I deeply love, I'm in, to be and will make

a full recovery. What is for that is the absolute utmost. Equally. My body has the ability to recover. Then I will push about twenty percent further through sheer mental tenacity. This room you are about to enter, is room of fun optimism and intense rap. Ray growth. If you are not prepared for that, go elsewhere from the management, and awesome, meaning that the picture that sent to me by someone it eventually got sent everyone by everyone. So is it a viral picture of that sign on your door that you eventually actually in writing to make sure everyone sought. You, you eventually, you do get home and

and again you know is. I will check out to make a really important point about this Cosette that that was really a learning point. For me I was a job point in it and it comes back to what we have to. We talked about earlier in the beginning, a little bit of this social leadership idea who use around yourself with, and in that moment I and individuals to one express pity, and I realized how dangerous that was because it I listen to long people express that it would be easy to accept that tax shut this victim mentality and I walked out road before and I was like no way am I going to allow that to happen. It is a choice and that's what people need understand, having a positive attitude on how you handle the situation. You're in is a choice, and the more you accept, positivity and drive it for

the more you actually start to believe it and it will create momentum and that's really what happened with that sign I said shouted. I will not allow that to happen again. No one will come in here and be sad because I refuse I will not allow and are an you never know the impact and the decision that you're gonna make it you never know how, even though deep down in shy you're like a holy shit, how do I get out of this situation, but you project that positivity, who you can bring with you and bring up and and how much you can leave a and impact on. Alas, a lifetime that sign has gone on to help. Hundreds of thousands of people have had people write me that have had cancer. I've had people that of right. That of written me that have had major horrific accidents. I didn't keep the sign. I had framed and hangs in the womb

Ward, Walter Reed, and the bottom of the sign is like Rob clean now, and I am told that all these wounded warriors whenever they go to a surgery they go by may erupt and it it continues to have this impact secretary gates about the sign. In his book, Michelle Obama spoke just came out, she wrote about the sign and what the impact is so one moment of saying I'm not going to allow someone else to drive. My thinking makes all the France, and I tell so many people that it is a choice. It is a choice, you can choose to be a victim and feel sorry for yourself. Are you to be a back and report, even if you don't believe it and the moment it doesn't matter, you know, say, live it and start driving forward and that belief will catch fire within you and everybody else around you no doubt about it. Man and and the unfortunate

opposite. That is when you stop allow yourself to be negative and you start listen to people that want to be negative and be dragged down. You can easily. He had had yourself in that direction as well, so, When you make a choice and make a decision on which one of those two directions you wanna moving up or down, we recommend you Give up we forward absolutely later spring Eric and I went out to eat at a local outback stake house to celebrate the on wiring of my jaw. They ve been almost seven months since I've been able to food. I was still underway in confined to wheelchair, because the grasp we both need a night out. As you know, When I was reading this book, I was eating something whatever you know. And it is one of those things that we all take for granted every single day and that of other multiple.

There's a war on this podcast and eaten a ball rice once a day or ball. Rice work twice a day that has chips award in it for for for six years, and here. You are, you know, you're, not the prisoner of war, but something as simple as eating a steak and that really like hidden. Hard because, as you know, I takes takes very seriously and I ended to think that like for seven months, no stake in the We think that an and that always gets me thinking about the day. We things that when I talk to my friends that have been wounded, it's like it's the daily every day, things and his matter factor we had Jim web on and he was talking. One of his friends had been wounded. Vietnam, and he is like that. Daily Kurds like that guy was courageous in Vietnam, but he's career

every single day. Takes him x. Amount of time to get up out of bed takes an x amount of time to get his prosthetics. It takes an x amount of time to do normal functions that people can normally do easily he's gotta stop Molly. Does it every single day without complaining, daily courage and so just think about you in that situation. Man, awesome I there's, a cargo was once a month preparation for my first surgery with Doktor Walden, which is scheduled for July. The airports in their crowds continue to be a torment. Little kids play did it called to their mothers to look at me to people refused to talk to me act, ashamed or embarrassed, or they set expressions of pity on their faces Certainly I raged at them. Are these people I sacrificed for coming back from a ship back from Chicago on one trip, I just broke every one who stared at me, I treated with a sudden boo, by the end of the trip, though I realized I did do something different.

Bitterness would eat me alive the game you fought. I came up with an idea when alighted designed a couple tee shirts. The first one said: stop staring: I got shot by a machine gun it would have killed. You put an american flag on the back and called it wounded where so, are you still making women wear shirts. So where do? Where is on pause for right now, but it will be coming back. Maybe we've we've got some work, we're getting things online and two thousand and nineteen but yeah a lot. People. Ask me when I will come back it we'll be back, I sure yeah, so this podcast, is it so, most likely when people are listening to this, it is life. Do you get it? You get your wounded where to yeah. We talk about that that sign and that sign got so much attention and was so so impact will to so many people you,

did up Gandhi, oval office. You ended up meeting President Bush with your family and then you ended up coming back to the White House again and we're going back to the book. I went to my monsters. Medal of honor ceremony in the White House. That April I was a fellow seal who would jump on it. A grenade thrown onto a rooftop. He had and say to his teammates firefighting remedy he she did his brothers with his own body and pay the And the price for that devotion it was deeply moving to be there to see. Mike's family receive his passion, medal of honor. But why was there? I met another seal named Ryan job. He been part of a team, three had served with legendary sniper

Kyle in Iraq during the two thousand and six campaign. Rhino Mark forty eight machine gun or for the team and during a fire fight that spring a bullet had struck his weapon, then hit him in the face destroying his right eye. He survived in REACH Bethesda much as would a year later, button nerve damage cost him his vision in his left eye the press better spending the rest of his life blind had do and terrifying though he never showed it. Instead, he announced that if he had to be blind, he would be the best Damn blind man. There was so That's where I met you for the first time. Obviously, Mikey and Ryan, and Chris we're all with me in task a browser in UK for the for the medal of honor. Ceremony for Mikey, and I actually remember looking at you guys. You know

look you guys talking to each other and I actually thought I had pictures of it, but I didn't I. I thought I pictures of you to talking, but I didn't have any pictures, but it was It was crazy sit there and look at both. You guys that have been you know both in Saddam forcibly Ryan. You know he lost vision. With eyes which obvious It could happen to you a very easily and thank God you know I didn't, did you guys, gonna? You know, I guess, when you have getting shot in the head and calm and you guys be kind of became brows, and- who continue on Iranian, I bumped into each other on multiple occasions over the next several months on one. Occasions. Ryan had come out to the EAST coast, seal teams were wounded, warrior banana an organisation comments, as we made

small talk and met, different people, I Ryan and another seal, had been shot me. I was joking around and came up with the idea for a club for seals who had been shot in the head. It was a very small love. We decided to call the club shit seals hit in the head. We unanimously voted on our motto. This club sucks so yeah just That's that they were doing with me was the same. They were doing with Ryan and obviously I was blaster key. Attitude was he was, gonna have a an awesome time all the time, regardless that situation he was in this girl, he was gonna, get after it and yet was called seekers me. Yeah, hey awry was awesome and you know he was a head. It was interesting because the regions,

correction process that they were doing with me was the same. They were doing with Ryan and obviously I wish blaster keep my vision. Although there were fixing things with this right, but so often I'd call him and I'd be like hey. You know you had this done, how to go in a. What did you do? Do you have any recommendations like anything new? No, you go to the people who have experience all right. I got close true that Europe has come learning from man? What one of the this this was another bit of her of a surprise To me again, this is the kind of thing that I never had to think about, but here you going back to book in the most have followed. I knew that I was in for the long game, the slug first juries and setbacks continued and again, you gotta read this book to realise the absolute just medical medical trauma that you're going through day in day out in this. Really drove it home to me. I called him medical buds there you go, it's really what it was nickel buds

and here's here's one thing that just hit me like a ton of bricks by the summer of two thousand and nine I would starting to run low on the available patches of skin for drafting my body was right the scars from surgical sites in over a dub dozen graphs that to me I'm thinking myself, I mean You're running out of skin, the graft to to do dear to do damage repair to your face. What is, process like so a lot of times they harvest the skin from you know, you're thighs, in areas and in it, and it wasn't that I was just running out a skin. There are running out of steam. I've got quite a few tattoos, so my is totally tattooed. You know, you know, talk my arms so that's what the problem was becoming putting too to scan on other partner bodies, no big deal. They could cut that second by obvious, play they were like we did that I did not put tattooed skin on my face.

So that's where we were starting to run into issues and This really is something that a lot of people don't understand with with battlefield injuries is their super dirty bombs are dirty. Bullets are dirty and you fall in the soil and you bleed into the soil overseas and that's nerdy, so the a majority of wounded warriors come home, especially from this war within faction. Apples and there so many guys, myself included that it's not your initial injuries that are as devastating I mean. Obviously there's levels devastation for so many of us it's the infection problems. So many I come back with their limbs and end up losing their limbs because of the infection had major infection problems which caused us. Continue have to do more and more graphs. They would have to cut out what they had done, because it was infected and failed. They re built minus three times ass,

first to that totally cut out and start over. So that's why we were starting to run into issues hey. Where do we know? Where do we get more cartilage? Where do we get more skin They can use cadaver, but it does not. It does not last it doesn't always take, so they always want to use your own body and that's where we start to run and issues September twenty. Fourth, two thousand and nine Roy job is dead. I had known Ryan incredibly well, I wouldn't a close friend, we talked on the phone. Occasionally we share the common experience and discussed our notes on recovery and we share. A sense of humor but above Oh, I respected his spirit and relentless energy recapture all here, out of life. He made them a host of every moment and achieved thing

most people with your eyesight intact. Never would into I was making climbed Mount Rainier when I heard about that I was blown away in the climbing community, the fourteen thousand foot volcanic Mountain in Washington State considered one of the most difficult to summit in all North America. It has We crevices narrow, wedges and glacial ice. It is as technical climb, as you can find. Mountaineer claims on average three lives year of those who aspire to summit. In writing, made it to the top to you, after that bullet robbed him of his vision. He and Kelly, who had married he in Kelly we're getting ready to have a daughter together Ryanair started. A new life founded I passed the blaze and had built something from the ruins He really was being the best. Damn blind man out there, then, with a snap

of cosmic fingers. It was all stolen from him If you don't know the story, there was. We want, one of his many surgeries cause. He was still going through surgeries and, after surgeries? There was complications and he he died as well. They killed him. I mean they must stop you There were several overdose term. That was a total mistake and that slay me Ryan's death rocked me.

Because I know how hard it is to stay positive and to drive forward despite these really hard injuries and arm in interest. He killed me to know that you know it was a medical mistake that killed him. Did I mean it's hard enough to go through all this? derive battle on all these things, so that that that really shook me when Ryan had died and you're still looking at unknown numbers of surgeries head and it at the time yeah now was halfway through. So this was two thousand nine. I ended up having surgeries all the way up until Who tells from eleven yet and the other thing that was crazy about Ryan was I'm not gonna say he was out of the woods I mean.

But he was pretty damn far out of the woods and that's why you know the losing. My tat was just a fuckin nightmare yeah you at this point. You still want to get back to the teams and Europe trying to get your arm fixed to the point where you can have enough mobility in it too. To change magazines to operate your weapon. She you go into a budgeting people trying to see who is who can make this happen? finally find a guy, that's beautiful, you think you have. Lead on something that can make this happen and You gotta, see him and he said

is going back to the book jam you to be frank with you. If you were my son, I wouldn't let you do this. What you have now is the best possible outcome If you proceed and have another surgery, your problem, lose some of the range motion. You have now worse your set self up for a lifetime of chronic pain. The drive home was a quiet one. For me, as I deliberated weather, or two world dice. One last time by the time I turned off the freeway for Virginia, I knew it was not worth the risk. My day as an operator were over to me always suspected. This might happened. This might happen now. It was confirmed I had no picnic during the drive home about what to do now as the that dream to kick doors again slipped away. What would I do? How would I support my family I didn't have any answers, but I knew one thing: I'd live

as Ryan Joe Pad his memory and never take another day for granted. Ryan's death reminded me that nothing is guaranteed in life. They can be taken away and Harpy the light you ve, been with everything you ve got can come apart, an instant from sir. Some stances far beyond your control. You either adapting overcome, or you become a casualty. Of those twist of fate. I refused to be a casualty.

So you get this news that hey you're, not the EU that we can do is what you got. What you got swear Europe and the idea of getting back operational again is gone. And it's funny you now we're just talking about. Here you are over talking to some students buds and yet a guy that was was, but we ve been injured older guy said: wasn't reeled to come back as medically dropped medically dropped? Not We have to come back and so dream is guarded interesting you're talking to him and you ve been through it, then through it and Your attitude was ok. When we do now. And, like I told him I mean so you know this this idea life ambushes. I told him. I said you just stepped into one.

Da there. There small ones in big ones,. A lot of times their totally unexpected, but the reality is Damn bushes aren't totally unexpected their indicators that we see before we ever get into it whether we're aware of seeing them or not. Sometimes it's after the fact that we look back nine hundred and eleven is a good example of there were indicators that we missed before nine slash. Eleven happened, Verasa shields. When we move into areas we know that's a bad area. We are in an area where we're getting channelized, there's high ground. Above us, this would be a good area to executed ambush. You know for me,

I had seen those indicators coming, so I kind of new one was coming. I have met so many doctors who said literally the doktor from Johns Hopkins who put my arm back together. They actually wrote a medical journal about what he did with my elbow. I mean he successfully reconstructed and elbow that had been totally destroyed. And it was always funny to me. There's an arrogance and I think there has to be. There has to be a little bit level, a baronet arrogance and confidence in high level, orthopedic surgeon. So every time I go meet, one of these guys they'd be like. Oh, I can fix your arm. And then they slap that x rays and I'd watch. It was like the Erika shocked out of the room ass. They looked at it and then they would look at me and they say yeah man, I'm sorry they're like I don't even know how your arms work in the way it is so. When I met the guy from Duke who was one premier, you know hand and arm guys,

literally the guy that put my arm together was probably the premier had an organ. I tried. Get him to go back and do more and he said no, he said there's no way in Hell. He said your arm He said: go in your arm and getting what we got is a miracle he's like I'm not going back in, and I recommend against anybody else doing it. Well, I still try to find out doctors it. It was this guy from do who finally convince me someone moment came a kind of new so as opposed to this young man from budget was less unexpected than what I step For me, it was ass unexpected, so they just became. Where do I go from here?

an international enough. I had laid out some different things for myself one I wanted to do a twenty year career so that country became my first thing. Can I still stay and and finish my career? Maybe I can't be operational at this point. I was that damn neck, and I think I was eighteen years at this point showed him in four years, almost four years from my injury and so over a couple of days, I talked to I was working in operations and I just said hey what our options? What can we do in actual allowed me to go work some new things, different projects in different thing, so It was great. They allow me to finish what I set out to do, but it also gave me a decent amount of time. At this point it was another year before we started the medical retirement process which actually took two year secure.

Made a twenty one years and it gave me a lot of time really look at. You know where does my future go from here and can allow what are my new passions? What is my purpose in? Where do I go from this life after the military? What can I do with all these lessons that I've learned- and You know, how do I pay it forward? How do I order Ryan? How do I honor all these guys that every day I walked by this granite wall and they didn't get a choice, didn't get a choice to come home, so, thankfully you know I had that time. It's still within the community, but also coming to grips with the fact that

You know, like I talk to those young men about so many people are so strongly tied what they do for a living that they cannot function if suddenly, it's taken away from them, there's a lot of blood made a lot of police officers and firefighters shore professional athletes that, if suddenly their careers over they dont know how to function without that they they ve tied their identity so much around, what they ve done and arm. I realise that the lessons that I learned in that the seal teams and this journey that I've been on was incredibly relate a bull.

Then it way I nothing to do attacked what lessons I didn't need to be the guy that got out and talk out, issued or do anything, and that, like that, when I realized it realized, is there were amazing life lessons the lessons, Schuman, lessons, lessons in leadership and teamwork and overcome university in this idea of helping people, you know not only survive but thrive from crisis said ambushes, so that really started to become the path that I was walking and to help other wounded warriors. Well, what a wrap this last little, sir the book because we're talking about the identity and what you invested your life into, and you say this I held the trident in my hand this golden emblem had driven my life. I focused on it. I coveted it. I became an I'm honored by it. I almost lost it, and then I earned it back

before I sacrificed my body for it. Only then did I finally understand what it truly represented. It carried this of warrior poets like MIKE Murphy, MIKE Mike Sore and Chris Kyle. It carry this beard of my friends, Ryan Job, Adam Brown, MIKE Mcgreevy Kevin. System and the seventy nine other men who have made the ultimate sacrifice for freedom and the brotherhood, nine eleven. I didn't know why God spared me, but I did know I would find a way into the future where I would use each and every day to honour my brothers, who had not made at home.

And obviously you ve done a lot to honour our brothers. And I think you continue to do that. Obviously, every day with what you're doing and how you doing and how you're taking the lessons that you learned and bringing them to two more people spread. The word broadly. What did that translation transition? Look like like the front. Fine! You got out into what you are now cause you're mean. Obviously everyone is in the military right now. What I hate to break the news to you one day, you're gonna, be not in the military anymore bring us from. You know the end your career into where you are now an end where focus right now in and what you're doing

Yeah, absolutely, I think that transition is a lot harder than people realize. I think a lot of things. Are you experience this we take for granted at the level of structure that exists in the water and suddenly you get out and spelling world, and that's it there. I was a little before turned off that I have launched the nonprofit wounded where later become the combat when a coalition. While I was still on active duty, but so when I got out that kind of became my focus Scotty, I will say that I made the mistake that a lot of military members, especially special operations members, make when they get out I tried to do everything everything I saw was an opportunity that I didn't want to lose out on and I falsely can convince myself yeah. I had the ability to do that so running the nonprofit. We did a lot of amazing thing. She ought to know million dollars, we held thousands of wounded warriors even

created a a programme specifically to help or Nagoya build structure find their new passion. When I started to realize- and I was doing all this while I'm still trying to speak and develop content and work on things and take care of it we encourage and all these things I kind of had an epiphany and two thousand eighteen. I've been doing this for reunited retired in two thousand thirteen for five years. I ve been doing this and I suddenly realized you ve got to find that one thing that you true we are going to make a different chat and I took a step back in two thousand eighteen and said: where can I have the most impact and what really is my new mission? What drives my passion? Where is my destination, where I'm wearing Gonna shut that course to go, and I realized I look back in a we're doing a lot of great things with the non profit, but there's forty three thousand better nonprofits out there we are,

losing more guys to suicide right now, then we lost the enemy, and I said: ok, so one option as you go, create a whole other non profit, but there's a lot of good ones out there and I think, that's part of the problem, its diluting some of the message, so I said, maybe on better off focusing on helping a whole bunch of people with this message and Wendy my support suit to another organisation. So myself in the board, made the decision that we were in a face down our organization. Two thousand eighteen and two thousand nineteen made that shift that I'm totally focusing on delivering this content to help people overcome adversity too, to launch themselves out of failure and to not only survive, which some people just survive from these life ambushes from these massive catastrophic events, but to thrive from them to use them as a launch point to get better and to understand.

How to do that and cuz. I realized man. You know this you've written all this amazing content on it and all that is coming into the second book that will come out in December called overcome. So I have online courses that are getting ready to come on board here in the next couple of months, and I just want to get out there and help as many people as I can and then lend myself to some of the organizations that are out there that are helping our wounded warrior. Specifically with post, traumatic stress and traumatic brain injuries. One of the things I ve started doing a lot of research in what were beginning to understand. Is I used to think that if we can help guys find a new purpose after they got out, it would help solve their problems. Tuna warriors, but we're were beginning to understand. Is that

we have never the way we train now in the way we have fought. Wars is exposing guys, especially frontline combat units and special operate special operation units to level a blast that we ve never been in in up until this Point in the way we train the military we haven't done before. So I mean you look at our breeders and how many blast we expose them to just in train we're starting to see. I mean I've had multiple friends now that have killed themselves, who I said no way no way and I've watched these downward slides and what we're starting to find out if we are creating physiological impacts on the brain from these continued exposures to these blast. So we need more research. We need, you know we need more non pharmacological solutions to these problems and there's a lot of things that are out there that are on the floor,

so one things with research? I started doing some stop with the concussion legacy Foundation, which has the same group working with the NFL, or you know, highlighting the impact of see tee on anything players and we're going to realise that some of our special operations, guys like Rob, Google who took his life severe city, but what they figured out is its different. Some of the premium premier neurologists are out there a figure on its different. It saw its blast and the blast goes all the way through the brain, as opposed to a concussion, creates an impact and there's a centralized location. Now for guys, ten dollars out there that have had multiple concussions that creates more, but the bottom line is we need this research, so I don't get my brain to the concussion legacy Foundation and I'm encouraging all the veterans that are out there, If you have been in combat donate your brain, you don't need it.

I guess you don't need it. When you're gone and they're not gonna come earlier and collect via the bottom line. Is it is an amazing way to be able to give back to the veterans that are coming up behind you, because they don't have enough that term brains in the brain banks are out there to understand. The kind of trauma were putting on our brains and until the egg in an and obviously they can't study the brain while we're still live. So if, if you want a way to give back, look up the concussion legacy foundation and donor, your brain, I did it. We need research. Twenty thirty years from now we can make a deal. To save some young warrior. That's out there that got exposed to blast at now, can't figure out why his world is falling apart around him

So those are my passions. That's my purpose and I want to help as many people out there. I want to make you better help. You thrive from adversity, help you thrive from failure in crisis and for our wounded warriors. I wanna help. Try and solve this epidemic were in the suicides in them, a trauma. Yeah that's harming us is awesome. Its awesome see moving forward with that and I wouldn't go in for a while here in that probably a pretty good place to wrap. Where do where can people? mind you where she people locate you and when they wanna, when they wanna hear from you Yeah, absolutely best place, go to Jason, Redmen, dot com, that's my website and you can see what I'm doing and you can contact me through there. I'm on all the major social media platforms, Jason Redman on Facebook and Jason Redman, Ww Dot W on Instagram and twitter. Awesome ECHO

speaking about making people better, you Emily quick recommendations on how you know we could improve ourselves. Fur Zack Charles. By the way I one question in Ranger School they told you daylight when they asked you need your gucci. That's the thing they can assent you over that when this the good you think. No, I don't think it was a really it was. It was the Lamb S, comments about taught landmass, so The funny thing about TAT, Gucci Jacket is show the army guys were only allowed to where the army jacket liner, where we didn't have those and eyes, Gucci Patagonia. I had the member, the green, ok, yeah, that's what I had, and so every day I put that on, the Reynard structures would lose their. and in the beginning I had such a bad attitude that I just took it in the negative,

The second time I went through it became the. How often can I put this on and spend these cuts, so I I still have this habit everytime, I pull it out of my closet. It puts a smile on my face, those nice, what else questions. Yet we can talk about getting better, though there and Andrews Bodiced are start into due to bomb. So he's gonna need a digital, be renewed get out up where we're gonna have come up with a key from origin hundred percent. Not even ninety nine percent hundred percent one hundred poor gene or made in America. That's all. We need continue to grow this country, yes, Sir, so yeah origin, if you're into Jujitsu getting into Jitsu or already, and you want to be a new key or another key, forging mother use, it used to be.

Does the market for used geese now, there's a problem depends on who wore a guarantee. There's people out there. They Jacko gave that gets a little weird that doesn't smell good, oh yeah. Maybe some some people maybe so, unlike last weight or something you not use this gene and worry when you may around ends to avenge anywhere out again, although I knew I was talking to me the other day, the amount of key pants or keys period that have been returned is like so yeah. We get like three geese back a year with. Accident warned about, did don't wear out the words geese. Do not wear out you have used up yeah you got yeah like if you lose weight or something and then you don't use it anymore or

If you like, you get the new one, and you know how I can turn you back to an old one, because the new and that's the new hardness. You know you don't really where it anymore ass. He gave it to your France, something like there's that you want a disease, rash guards tee shirts. Other stuff supplements supplements joint warfare. Joint worsening crude krill oil turned out to be the most important supplements there are in my opinion, he thought was a protein powder and creating that's what we thought in the beginning. There anymore joint four hundred of these, we thought that, well, yes, I agree with you- have drunk oil and if you do want protein, you might as well at giant Did you sell some mark? It still good for get only we need growth and we need the approach that we have mark which have you try mark ok, we're! U just walk in specially while it was what flavors you like, I like mid chocolate chip,

I am a phantom social, legitimate mark, but apparently Doc, Luke hates met. Apparently he was going berserker. The other saying why would you drink something that tastes like toothpaste, so as it turns out some limited back to another friends analogy some: it's like you, either, love it or you really don't like it. That's as it turns out that the situation with them, we have meant peanut butter, chocolate, vanilla, guerrilla, I'm a huge peanut butter, chocolates. Ok, it's ok! That's why I do like sent shock lit by about it here. I got hostile with my whole family, the other day, while not on the whole thing, with my wife and my youngest daughter, because there was No, I wanted some yogurt, and there was no blue buried. There was no strawberry. There was no cocoanut. There was only vanilla, so I started say why would a human being in two thousand nineteen by vanilla,

yogurt like choose of all that I get. If it comes in the variety package you end up with you understood, but still selected. No wrong answer, so I had to get hostile. These were hostile and others tell my wife and my youngest daughter that they are crazy for just like. In that vanilla They are for sure, but at the end of the day you understand of other people have other opinions. My seems my this daughter, nine years old she makes so, She does. She takes Travers, cut him up, and then whipped whip cream on it and then she, eggs. Were your kid mark strawberry at sprinkles? nice Cornelia know how they will protein protein Carol. Yet we are working on this. For the kids read more formally Leonardo's. I know that possibly do drink. It.

Like me, they get. You certainly do also if you want to represent, while you're on this path, to do to work in our waking up or weaker Bernie. I do. How do I get up a five day? Ok, so the up early crew, if you're on that you want to represent aesthetically, jugglers store, Jacko Store, so good chocolate stored outcome that we can get shirts discipline equals freedom, that has Jockers face on it. This is good backwards for you too much. For you in your Yonah, represent very fitting for today story right, yeah, but look at yourself. Yes, adversity! That's what they're gonna bring problem. How long do good opportunity look for? Actually I like that, like a freaking out, cuz, there's a lot of different approaches. You know, like you, said, get off the x in like look for Absolutely admit you out is: usually people look back, they look back with it. ECHO,

what's going on right now, kind of thing, which is natural by the horse. Rigour, but many that's good locally, that long enough to assess what you did wrong and then you move forward, learn some lessons forward, but so yeah, if you represent, go to juggle stored dot com, not a cool stuff on there? If you like something gets something nobody's there by the way. By the way are they thick? ok, then does it doesnt. You know, that's not what I'm looking for well, we're and another thing recall when I finally get the hoodies that I want Mccall Michigan Hoodies, or in Minnesota video for their people, Ask him over we're out right off

North North Pole or who worked Erika pen before tax. They wanted that lightweight Hooty during the polar vortex bro. Now I'm just saying, there's like different regions of the world, so you get that lie with firm guarantees for wanting below somewhat region that we're talking about is coal. Yes, sir! Ok, I dig it, and that is a good name for cool. So When it gets cold, you can have hot Jocker whitey, yes as a whole, the call jock weighty can yokels on Amazon will ever subscriber the bark asked. If you want to Don't forget about the warrior kid podcast student, other people say that's the best podcast for kids ever fear. Vienna forgets inheres why you feel that way, you will be run by the way heedlessly because

it's so simple, sear like thinking of it in terms of we are making listens to this all they're gonna, get it fully, and then you listen. Do you like I'm gonna get you tell me you know like it's kind of for me, so I will adopt man we complicate every year. Do yes, that's the that's why I love the warrior kid books. This is a message for a ten year old and guess what I've had. I have many adults it say. Thank you for your book. One of another. Yes, it is that of that. Were your kid soap. From young Aden. Thirteen year old, where your kid has his own business he's getting after it he's got goats up and Central California. In milk, some you can't sell goat milk whatever in California, They got all these rules. So what can you do with it? You can make soap make himself and his be. His motto is stay clean.

I paid up, don't worry! I gave it to you, I'm so arrogant and egotistical. I want to take the credit for the for the name or whatever the mantra of Aden. Soap store. That's master that source yes, it's collaborative thing you do. A channel echoes makes a bunch of video speaking of arrogant. He thinks Videos are great any post them on their three. I've never demonstrated that they are really thank you. Ok, you sure about that raw. Soulier suddenly on that slips with yea. Yes, yes, yes, you too, there's a good in the video version of this broadcast to buy you know you can see what nobody looks like if you hear about that sort of thing. People watch. Will watch ones with gas because they want to do it because they know what I look like. They know what echo looks like they want to see. What J red looks I want to see. What does a man look like that? Took a three

Loya jirga at that point. They stop the podcasting press play on Youtube, see go along with. It is two million dollars in sexiness. So do you ever wondered where your american tax dollars went, went to a good cause, you're not going to six billion dollar menu? The two? I am not your million salutes hundreds, watch your for that to it's a little something I'll be out. Look it up on Itunes, that's what I say about it period. What. I have more to say during the Jays gotta go Maybe there's no psychological, Orpheus, kids, what it is! It's it's an album with tracks, Jackal checks telling you how to get through moments of weakness that you might come in about instilling that disappointed. Get up. I've actually listened a psychological. I thought I got flake for a second vote. Actually was, I stand, corrected,

We got. We got on it If we're, when you add to your home Jim situation in your home, fitness situation, good on Doc comes last Jacko, lotta good stuff on there at general I get rings actually rings a hundred percent. In my opinion, I am signing a hundred percent. The best thing that you can. I meet its ranks there. They are nowhere to go over southern think about after my own job you definitely deafening an average. That's the first thing you need, I used to say the first municipal apart, but you can do, more with rings, and you do poem. So let us not get rags kettlebells too, by the way. I guess I'm sure, We ve got some books, ok, first of all book, I again read a bunch of excerpts today, but not even close to pudding, giving justice to this book. The trident Jason Redman we will, but upon this right here, Sir, it's on the top. You are innocent on the park, Astrid lulling from episodes

be handed over our website and thought. Oh, that looks like a cool website from ninety. Ninety sexier revise the only guy. I was one of the only guy knows a caravan. That's ninety six, but that's cool, maybe echoes just doesn't like me wretched. The gradual seventy eight more years, it's gonna look that's happening with it with websites. You know you're, out of your time the jackals store website books, all cool basic. Why is tat? Well, you know varies reason. Ok cool! That sounds great got some books making the dragons kids book for it's between the ages of four and one hundred The elements are making the dragons waiting your kid and marks mission. Those are out and we have book three which I completed is being drawn up the artist right now, John Balzac, we're gonna put that option pre warder it so you as well

sell out of books like we did, making the dragons immediately. So I will fix this time. I apologize last time this political freedom field may not get that how to get after it. Audio is on Itunes, Amazon, music. Google play extreme ownership first book that I wrote with my brother leaf ban and the follow on to that that economy, leadership talking about don't go too far in one direction or the other, as a leader or you will blow it in France, my leadership, consultancy and what we do is sought problems through leadership. The problems you have in your organization. I won hundred percent guarantee their leadership Brahms, that's what they are and that's what we do me a bad and J P. L Dave Burke, Flint Cochrane MIKE's really might by my good echelon front dot com. If you need help with leadership in your team or organization, the muster speed leadership. Is our leadership conference two

nineteen. This one has gone down. May twenty third and twenty? Fourth in. Hi town? shall I tell you to Chicago? We stakes, we're we're sorry about leadership, support the nineteenth and twentieth in Denver Colorado. We need stakes near you and then December. Fourth and fifth in Sydney, Australia, we're gonna go there and he s wearing the stakes there as well. Look it All these events have sold out completely and All these are gonna sell out too. So, if you want to come, go to Stream ownership dot com to register, I mean worse, its selling, a law right now and I haven't even posted anything about it, so I'm and also I don't want people to. I don't want non podcast listeners to get crack at an early here and I'm gonna have to postings. Let people know what's up the phone line, So this is online interactive leader.

The training it is interact. I know I know I did. It sounds like one of those words Lego, like a buzz word, re Interactive, straight up interact yet, like me, Kay rambles video games back in the world about the same age where old, school computers right where you can like all on travelling through the woods and I can go down. Choose venture yeah, you know, and you can choose one ever go good, it's kind of like values, You have to make leadership decisions in the all. My trinity once learned the principles you have to try and apply them to combat in business situations, so ye, have online dot com check it out. You can get it as an individual or you, enterprise version for your whole company, so that's that and he have over watch where were connecting combat, proven leaders from the sky. Cops community and from the combat aviation community with companies in it We in sector that

need. Leadership, proven leadership to alight and move their company forward go to E f over watch dot com for that and if you wanna continue this conversation asked questions. Give us answers tell me what I miss pronounced me what historical fact I got wrong hit us up, we're on the spot on Twitter Instagram and on the face book the Facebook Jason Redman is at Jane. Red Minute W W Echo is adequate Charles. I am at Java willing echo anything else. Thank you. So much refer me. J remedy any some thoughts to shout out everybody out there. You know, most importantly, obviously my my beautiful wife who our journey is included in this book. So

if you are one of the lovely females are out there. That would say. Maybe this book is it for me, it absolutely is once again it is not a combat book it as a journey of leadership and at its heart and soul. It is a love story. Had my wife never bad it an eye on this journey, and this book is dedicated to her and my kid shoes love brought me home, so big shot out. And a big shot out to both you guys, thank you for having me on, and forgetting turn, we need more leadership out there and you guys repugnant out there so much ass, a brother thanks for coming on and obvious, thanks for your service to our country, thanks for what you did for the teams and thanks for what Your continuing do right now. You ve sacrificed a lot and you're still out there. Every day grinding in making things happened, thanks for doing that, man overcome

and, of course, of thanks to all are military personnel that are standing watch around the world to protect our freedoms, and at most appreciation for those wounded warriors like J who contain you to sacrifice bravely every day for the freedoms that we all enjoy, and also You two are police law enforcement, firefighters, paramedics, empties correctional officers, border patrols, all the first responders out there who stand watch on the home front to keep us all safe and to everyone out out there. That's listening! There really are no ex uses their non men like J Redman, proof that men, like Ryan Job, prove that without question. So don't allow yourself to fall short, don't

allow yourself to give anything less than everything you ve got to take them to the enemy who ever in whatever that enemy might be. Do you're supposed to do be, who you're supposed to be by going out there every day and getting after it. Then until next time, MRS Jason Redmond and ECHO and Jacko out.