What’s the most unusual place you’ve ever been on a date? We asked Modern Love listeners and the responses did not disappoint. Rummaging through landfills, listening to cases in night court … the stories get weird. Plus, there’s one that our host, Anna Martin, considers the most bizarre of all (hint: dead bodies).
For our last episode of 2022, we start with Dev Aujla’s essay about how he wound up traveling on a cargo ship across the Atlantic ocean with a woman who, weeks earlier, had broken up with him at the advice of her astrologer. Then, we hear from all of you.
This is our last episode before the holidays. We’ll see you in 2023!
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Now and strong
and I love you more than from the new york times, I'm animals. This is modern love, and this is our last.
episode of the season and work at a started. We
You hi hello. We ask you to tell us
most unusual place. You ve ever been on a date. It was a first statements about weird sin and I gotta say you all delivered, but governing the two hour, but right across the united states
at a marina for a memorial service for someone I didn't, know the top floor of the watergate ho ho out on this lesson. We walked halfway around the boat
We have so many more of your stories and we'll get to them later in the episode. But first today's essay is about a date in a really weird and frankly unromantic spot and it's a date that lasts for ten days. The essay is written by death, oslo and read. By comes
listen. I run a cargo ship in the middle of the atlantic ocean with the sun setting in a light wind. This
in resembled one of those retirement brochures in which a couple stairs wistfully
across the open sea and into their future.
exception. I barely knew each other. It was our tenth date
hmm
I have connected with lives through work a few months before
had gone out on several dates felt promising then
He called to tell me she didn't feel ready for actual words were
my astrologers says it's not the right time. I'm not
big believer in the stars.
So I hung up turned
friend invested about that astrologer, who definitely hadn't been out on any of our dates
the position of the stars on the day lives was born, derail my dating life today. The next morning,
I settled into the familiar let down of losing something that had barely begun resigning myself to more the casual dating that so off
characterizes relationships in new york city a few weeks later, lisbon,
it's me as I was returning home from a friend's wedding overseas. She
had changed her mind.
In a small chinatown bar. I showed
photo. I dig
cargo ship in the middle of the atlantic ocean.
seeing the ship made me think about how we no longer know the size of the world, because we Don'T-
feel the distance when we travel. What would it be
to experience how far north america is from europe.
To travel by sea as migrant
when they came a century ago from india. Let's do it. She said
she'd had two glasses of wine.
let's take a cargo ship across the atlantic, together, it'll be our next date
We both laughed
the next morning I welcome and texted to tell her. I was
Thinking about the cargo ship,
When are you free? She replied
any time in the next three months. I was mostly joking that it was,
also kind of true my work.
consultant for startups, allowed me to send my own schedule her work,
gave her similar flexibility
A few hours later she told me she had booked it
we would leave the two weeks I gulped things weren't supposed to mean
their fast. We had never spent more than five consecutive hours together we had never spent the night ticket
and now our next state would involve a ten day trip with only a few other travellers and crew on a cargo ship. Yet
I knew I had to say. Yes, why not take a big leap when I finally told my family, my
and tried, unsuccessfully, to meet her and
brother sent me youtube. Videos of dates gone back on cruise ships. It all started.
Feel overwhelming and like a fairy,
bad idea after we
Where did the ship in Halifax? It was clear
our room had been built with roma,
mind too,
down single beds. Lined a wall are small bathroom wreaked if sewage and diesel
the ship was fifteen stories tall and as long as three football fields, there were only twenty eight people on board.
Including the captain and eighteen crew members. Listen, I
started to unpack. She had brought new sheets cashmere blank
candles and lamps. I had brought.
all persian rug, scrabble board
cards books and the list of questions to ask on a date
just in case.
My side of the room felt like a dormitory
while hers.
like home.
So her side is where we state
as we laid on the single bed adjusting to each other shipping
containers were being stacked with hard funds
if our window,
fell into a rhythm as our journey began reading,
sleeping in sharing stories with the other travellers we
Friend it a dutch couple who had been traveling the world for six years and their modified toyota land cruiser
They call themselves overlanders
Big excitement involved emergency trills, where we would rush.
hundreds of metres of container made ravines and water sealed doors up a five cent.
Metals staircase on the ships outer edge to these.
vessel at the stern we spent
are afternoons camped out next to the
espresso machine. One night, the filipino crew hosted karaoke,
After a traditional meal of senegal and breaded fish.
all. The idleness meant that listen. I had no choice but to get to know each other.
Mundane interactions turn into deep dialogues about our pasts hearing the captain.
A story about sending money home to his daughter,
lead, listen mantle, long, converse,
question about our relationship to money and how it has evolved over time.
every day on the ship fell.
Like a month of dating in new york,
those ten days we spent.
More than a hundred sixty hours away together, shared
two dozen meals and made
more than the average couple dozen five months by the third day, I told liz I loved her by the fifth. We were talking about the future by the eighth we
arguing. She said I didn't consider her needs. I was
pressuring her to be social when she needed time alone. I wanted her to see
things my way and wasn't listening in turn. I thought she was.
Setting the reality of where we were. We just
Where did each other in our small room? There is
where to go. If
been back in new york, I would have left and met
best friend at a neighborhood bar to complain about her. He would have supported me and I would have felt entitled to move on paper.
eating the dating cycle. I had been stuck in for more than a decade on the ship. However, there was known,
talk to to tell me I was right or wrong. I walked to the outdoor deck underneath the bridge
and sat on a metal box filled with life fest swell
stayed in the room with
all afternoon I just sat there replaying
our conversations there were moments
she had told me: she needed space age
Hadn't heard
had never allowed myself to move slowly enough to
truly understand what was being said. I never recognised
gap between what I said. What I did and, most importantly, what I wanted.
hours later. As the sunset I walk,
through the window, this corridor entered our room,
and sat down next to her on the bed. I'm sorry! I said I am too she said,
We fell asleep on a single bed
Two days later, we arrived in liverpool, england in
time it was her
almost our one year anniversary, we checked ourselves into
four star hotel, ordered room service and watched a bad movie. I looked at this
I loved her, laugh her red sweatshirt. Everything was perfect on the plane back to new york. The next day we opened a bottle of champagne,
A few weeks later, we went to listen astrologer for our first relationship breeding you're a match,
the astrologer said.
My areas loses aquarius, the rising sign in the sun and the moon were all on our side.
And more recently as the corona virus brought our city and country to a terrifying standstill. The two of us
quarantined in a small house across the street, from where I grew up. It's ok,
We didn't mind isolating ourselves for us
It made all the difference
the
after the break. I get loses
on the home ship situation plus more
Your stories about these dreams places you banana date
seriously? Some of you have been to some weird spots. That's next.
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visiting. In my time, stockholm, flash holiday guy devon liz, hello.
I Anna today, you wrote this. I say how many years ago, two years ago and what's what's happened
for the two of you since then we ve got married and twenty twenty eight
here's a while ago congrats! Thank you. Thank you. I actually want to start with you liz in the weeks leading up to the ship journey. What was going through your mind? What were your emotions? I almost didn't go hmm and I think the big question in my mind was what, if Devin I actually don't like each other know what if we are
We don't have a connection and then I'm stuck on a ship with this person who maybe we don't even really enjoy each other's company or we get upset at each other and so that felt sort of wild, and I call my best friend and I said: do you think I should call him and tell him that I'm canceling the trip and she said I think, no matter what happens between you and of you will always regret it. If you don't
I now what happens the outcome? Doesn't matter it's about making decision to choose hope in romance right now. Had you chosen hope before in this way
I had actually I had been married before I got married when I was young, and so is a very jaded by the time it was like. Almost
Ten years later, when I was in a situation when dove- and so this was kind of my first instance of choosing hope again right and what word the two of you feeling as you walked onto the ship for the first time- oh, it's so intimidating, you're, so small, and it feels
if you're just entering like the belly of something you are and there's no way to get off. There's you don't even know who to talk to to get off. You don't even know where the door is to get off you're just in and they left us in a very
and then there like we'll talk you tomorrow morning. Please don't walk around and they do
tell you when you come on just to clarify,
there is no medical attention here. This is the crew and there is no doubt
during this boat, and so then we're sitting here. Thinking
hey, we really are on our own and then right when we sat down, we brought bunch of food with us and of eight some knots
My legs triggering bore him wait. I would love to know what comes next, after that, none of these raw myths right
and I put one in my mouth and I've had like been allergic to other things in my life before and I you know you start getting like that. Tingly feeling now or I was like. Oh
I, what am I gonna do here? I just gotta pay attention to my body and then after he was able to speak again, has I think, his allergy subsided. We just tried to be really positive
and so I said, let's take turns naming things that we really like in the room. He was like. I like that there,
wall like
that there is a well. I love that I like that, there's! Well. What did you say? Do you remember the things that you said yeah I think I said I like that we have a little window and then he said that he liked that there was a wood like fake wood paneling on the wall. He found that very comforting. I love the
is, though I mean in in this moment where it really seems like it's all downhill from here. You're like let's play a game where we focus on the good things. How did you feel when she proposed that gamed of Lena I was down for any
using this as soon as I get there, I think that's a big part of our relations
ship now, looking back in hindsight, we both always treated just be really happy with what is
and in tat moment as earlier. I have a friend here, you're going to be good,
nevertheless, thank you so much for this conversation with such a treat to talk to both of you incoherence wherever I am inspired by devon lives. When I go on dates, I pick between like
one of three bars. If I'm feeling really crazy, maybe we'll get some ice cream, but I feel like I'm going to have to rethink my entire strategy because you all sent in some stories about dates in weird spots that sounded
like so much fun early in my weight with my husband, he took me to landfill old bicycle boat and there were,
we're hearing about, and I dont
I remember it mowing too bad. It was a really cool stay. We meet on a street corner in chinatown and we are participating in a with derby to and fro everyone with rubbish love, and we might hear the trash bin outside all the fishmongers in chinatown, pulling out things. We can do together later, where he ended up losing the type of people with me and amy playing around in the trash we had so much.
I'm doing it with a laughing her heart. One of my friends said: you're gonna marry her. He was right so after just having met this guy
random stranger. In an airport I meet up with him on the side of the road and the adirondack mountains. For
winter hike up a high peak a graveyard at two in the morning. It was awkward near from very high for my highschool
from an unusual to date. I have always taken here too, were made in downtown programme, will listen to the full, the previous a chance to talk to one another. I heard a couple.
The same, adding their weapon mary. Happily for fifty years, thank god we hit offered knighthood and then
Maybe there is some spots that are a little too creative when I heard this next call from Natasha Javan in favour. Arkansas I was like this is it this is the winner. I mean it's not a contest, but if it was, this is the winner, ding ding, ding, most unusual dates, but ever any sort of I need you to hear Natasha.
His whole story. It starts off normal with an online connection there
this guy who I was friends with on facebook for a while, and then he color slid into my
On this point, I would like to take you out on a date, so we got this really fancy makes kara surround and
Ok, so the vibe is really good. He's very handsome. I'm hottest shit, so things are going great. Then he gets a phone call in so he looks
May he does hey? That's my job. I work at a morgue
and I'm the guy that goes to pick up dead bodies.
But I'm really enjoying your company and I dont want to date in
Do you mind picking up this dead body with me? I said yes, so
driving for like an hour and a half, and I look over and I'm like, am I the corpse, because no one knows where I'm at this is along long
and I didn't there mom girls if we're going to do,
they tell me now
Like you, I promise I promise like we're going to get an actual their body, so we drive the rest of the way we go pick
this, oh dear lady, who died in her sleep and let me tell you about the dead people, bad things that were driving. So you stop the body down to the passenger side, but is on this thing called like a roller, and so it's slides back and forth. So if you hit a break then it hits the back of the passengers.
So it is riding and talking and low dailies like smacking me. I'm a bag
turn round. Now I speak to the dear lady because I didn't want to be rude. We finally get to wherever they like, fixed the bodies of it and we walk again. He crossed the line on
it's a fucking six other little all day, white people.
and I'm like this is how you,
I, this is how you die in the scary movies, and this is how, like all the black people in the audience, is screaming at the black girl get out, but I didn't get out and went further.
The funny thing is, though, now he doesn't work in the morning anymore, he's a barber which is way less exciting and probably why we broke up, but the point he is dead bodies on offer
date. No one can talk back well, very, have it thanks to the task of divine into or other data.
Elizabeth Lee and christopher card right from hanover new hampshire, daisy down from chicago illinois, jean Gallagher
from gainful florida gareth miles from brooklyn new york, Emily Russell from new york in Martin Bloomberg from long island
this is our final episode of the season. We're taking a tiny break and we'll be back with new episodes varies modern.
Is produced by illicit deadly julia
harold christina Joseph and hospital. Its edited by cyrus harrison, this episode was
by dan power. The modern lovey
it is by damn powell original music. In this episode, identifiable and mary Lozano digital put.
Gin behemoth, blarney, nl, globally, special
thanks to anna diamond that item and to all of the people who sent us voice, males and females and voice memos. We left each and every one of your stories. The modern love column is edited by Daniel Jones
merely is the editor of modern love projects. I'm anna Martin thanks for listening.
yeah.
Transcript generated on 2022-12-23.