Hey, what's going on is bill. Byrne is time for the thursday afternoon, just before friday, monday morning, podcast and I'm just your little new eu. Just checking it on Europe has gone is your thursday? No seriously how's it going some them out? He has seen the family back east. There was some gigs minimal Bar wilkes berry. Pennsylvania, I said. I have always found pennsylvania fucking depressing lesson. Philly or if a man this is something about driving. Certain parts of the country. I don't know what the fuck it is. I think it goes back to when

No one knows who the fuck- I was just drive and some gig in the middle of fuckin. Nowhere. how are we drive and out to like fuckin pennsylvania, upstate new york. Genuine now you want to see me in a bad mood. Get me on the fucking eighty seven north. you know this- is that there is some sort of cut off. I dunno where it is somewhere else somewhere around poughkeepsie. You know I just drive and it was funny- is both pennsylvania in new york, a fucking gorgeous jude. fucking gods country- Screen, fucking topography, you know I. All kinds of water on the geography. I do wonder, knows what this phonography sorry.

Where the fuck a beautiful, but this is something about it, get non. Eighty seven north one term. oh, my god, I this gave way and north northern vermont. and Jesus Christ Keep rent a fuckin car and you just get in any, is pointed at montreal. Any just started driving The driving in driving the driving this fuckin. Some boy. Your bank, the right over the fuckin hudson river. And then you are in vermont. Then you, like our wines, is gonna, be great. Donna gig vermont I've ever did stand up for what sir I just fuck. You woke up.

I never even did stand up in vermont I'd check, another state off the falcon list. Oh billy, o c d, a guy just can't get baby fangs gay yeah, yeah yeah. I can make everybody second lances what I did all the way up to vermont Those working in this hotel or some shit. And I was this: guy was middle and for me Nice guy and everything this fuckin asshole. Was supposed to do like twenty minutes. I'm afraid I did like thirty seven, which is just way falcon over my head lining was forty five minutes back then, on that gig. And his fuckin asshole disasters and then he pulls the whole. I am sorry

Sorry, I didn't know the arid tab bar some bullshit like there right, the falcon next. Ninety one did coastal like an hour, now he was trying to do was burnt out the fucking crowd. So when I went up there, there was like nothing left. And I was so stupid. I believed them, then the first show that he didn't need that he accidently did thirty seven minutes. Fuckin guy was like forty years old And Jesus Christ he's to be pushing seventy. Now, Get scary man, MR fucking gig, was almost thirty years ago. Three years ago here I am still bitching about it. Rather than fuckin, should has gone up there in done. The gig. got myself. Some syrup would involve a souvenir throughout the world. This will show ceremony york city yesterday

I went to a matinee showing of american buffalo. Which was absolutely incredible. It's fun, it's one of the few players that I actually know. Then we're alone- long time ago. I was taken. I was thinking to take an acting class. If that's what it was. I didn't even think to take acting classes what was I ran into somebody. It was a comedian who got seen by somebody big and had never taken act and glasses, and they have them. A fuckin swept me to know what he was doing so he was telling me that story, any others look on his face like ie. Fucked up his whole career. So I was like well shit. I don't ever want to have that that look on my face

So you know, I just. I started taking art classes, so I remember before I took acting classes. Bobby jelly was, I dig. Some of my burma do would do some scenes. Dude see, do seven dead before you go over there dude, cool. So I went over and we did some scenes from american buffalo. Then I have not read the fuckin thing since then. This is what yet another thing that was like close to thirty years ago. So anyways I saw it was The play start lawrence fish bar. Sam rockwell, and this kid dad daring chris. and they went out and just fucking kill. First of I went into the theaters said circle in the square, what they call it

A square meaning times square, I didn't see a circle, I remember a long time ago I went there and I so true west. With philip seymour hoffman John c, rightly so, Well, that's pretty cool as the actors I've seen in there philip seymour have been jonesy riley lawrence fish burn samara quell it's new and coming kid daring, crests, fucking, amazing. I remember, I walked into theater immediately. Second, I walked in the theater. I saw the whole set up and everything I felt like this. Real fucking excitement like this is going to be awesome, Fuckin awesome Yeah Fuck it let's go down, please a glance at his ship. It's quite. it's come up: a fuckin lords fishbones on stays, unlike literally I mean I was like some poysers worker on the stage I was really like you.

ten feet away from a guy like that fuckin lawrence fischler, though guys. It's apocalypse now. Boys in the herd, the matrix second decade, after decade after decades of fuckin, incredible work. Is stillness you be opening the daring? I'll, kill in it and then fuckin and we're comes on, like fuckin the a lightning and then advantages, go is so they went by so goddamn fast, fuckin, amazing, absolutely incredible!. hilarious, dark. The whole thing There was also- and I was actually think it likely- this is fucking cool man, I'm in new york and I met a broadway play. Watch it amazing at stake, you know. Sometimes you know I just come to new york and I just feel like I do my little small town, shit.

This is where I get my slice a pizza. This is where I get a smoothly. If I'm trying to be good the club and go do a splat, the same shit I've been doing since the fucking nineties, but every once in a while. Actually do some new york shit like I'm in new york right now at a broadway play watching fuckin. Three: the best actors, I've seen or fuckin long time. Made the trip feel like you know like worth it. Highly highly recommended it's it's going until July. And, you know and if you're one of these guys really like dude, I'm not fuck and go into some see some fuckin. somebody, you no fuckin, we both Fatima stupid as fuckin broadway plant telling you If you want to disguise he hated data, go see this shit. You want. You know what you bring your wife's down there she's fuckin happy taken the dinner,

you go in there, she gets a programme She gets to dress up. And all of that shit you watch a great play and guess what She won't be mad at you for at least fucking. You know thirty six hours, Then something happened but enough for those thirty six hours. I just want to say that was really nice We should do that more. The whole thing the dinner tracing just being urges us like connecting again was really That's the only thing that stinks when you do something nice like that now the night yelling at you, but now commentators about what the fuck you just did. A change in the streets in it, said, walk and we walked. We run, which is Actually sick, we had the time the sick improves, we got. The tickets the old lady that take a boat was so nice. You like our right. I was there.

Ok, I'm sorry. Sorry, you had a good time very than in the new back into it again. So anyway, I went out, did stand up last night went out to the new york calmly club at I popped in it. The comedy sour, Then. Now a stronger solution classic new york, you know calmly club is the first time are stolen and it was kind of going. Ok, we gotta go in, I write and then I'm fucked the went over the sour. Now doing it again, within the hour, It gets just that much better. It's fucking funded was a good time. Although new york comedy club, I always feel a little old when I'm there. It's kind of a young crowd, I was doing my shit. This one young woman of the crowd was disliked staring at me blankly. Like who is as old idiot saying all this fucking ignorance shit,

The old me. What is said something. What is said, hey lady The fuck is your problem. But I'm old now and I'm like, I know where she doesn't have a problem- she's normal she's, looking at bald orange idiot appear deliberate, seen a bunch of dumb shit. and I still cannot one and then it was spoken. Making fun of abortion rallies and feminists just right out of the gate, just a kind of like sort of feel em out. If they were gonna be like laugh or whatever they they were there. She pretty good. I was part of me actually, I was tempted Take the night off, which I didn't. Which I did not because I knew I needed to do my add a little bit. So the night when people are actually pay and see me, I'm not goin up their fuckin. shaking the dust off the rostov full of the fucking expression is

but I was tempted, Both the mets any yankee said a home game last night in the mets, I just saw him play the dodgers, but I haven't been to their new. You know the new city field, I've only been to last one came. I went to wish that still at shea a painful places, a red sox man to go to looked over first basing I got right, that's why it happened play, that's for the past bar was, There, those where the falcon narrow behind the bag, and the man where air. they don't have a fucking allows these. Spent the most money in the league and he's in there playing like some of the Es baseball the league and believe still how can the trade deadline? I you know, I got a fucking, do somethin else, someone do it just great finally learn from their older brother across the fuckin river. There.

That's. What should do you spend more money than ever? Vile I was actually euros going to go, see the yankees, because the way they're playing with their record and everything that reminded me in nineteen ninety eight as much as I hated the yankees, I'm like greatness is greatness and I got to go see this fucking team. Then I did neither: there is also a disease stanley cup final tonight, Colorado avalanche versus the fighting terror prevailing new trading tend to become prepaid fergus. I I didn't watch. I went out method the goddamn one trying to guilt. You guys right now, I did the goddamn work. Can you say that about yourselves There was a fuckin, unbelievable game. I walked by abarbanel done my second, But it was three the three. Six months ago and the third period. an arm.

Colorado, one in overtime. And I wanted my bodies was fuckin texts may go into. This is like such high levels, sick level, fuckin hockey, All of my friends have picked colorado. Saying the too fast on all of this type of ship. This gap is the third time in I dunno, they got a defence and shit. I just always feel like the experience of a defense that is going to be tough to beat, but. I am running for colorado. I don't know why the action is one, I'm not I'm, not really fucking either way on this one. I will say this stand. Kosis goal against the fuckin ranges where he shot it, and then it went off his body and somehow went into the net That was one of those bullshit fuckin place. You can't fucking is no way to prove that he sought guided in, but he did. Absolutely fucking did the first thing. I thought I was reggie jackson when you stuck in that run down.

fuckin leaned his body is, If you know the fucking made, the ball go out and right field, Steve garvey is fucking pointing at him and of course the ref didn't see it. Ref didn't see it because it's the fucking new york yankees, the bronx she wanted to get out of there alive. It was the late seventies. summers, sam factors, I thought that goes bullshit, but those there's no fuckin way to prove it. It's just like. It happened so fast. I get why they called it a goal, but it was like you shot They want to hit him india's angled his body at the goal. And but it was grows perfect because he gideon fuckin slap at it with the sandy and kick at it with his foot? He just sort of fuckin This body, you know square, but the net instead, the rest,

congratulations to the rangers over those fucking, brutal, ass or whatever many mean. They seem to be headed in the right direction and what blows my fucking mind is they ended that fifty four year curse and there are Coming up on thirty years already since they wanted the last time. It's real there more than half way there. Curse was twenty eight years and twenty eight years, they're fucking twenty. The twenty eight years to halfway there. Jesus Christ time is flying away. I say that the montreal canadians have wanted and twenty nine years. which was just unheard of when I was growing up. Those fuckin assholes.

So when it like every year than the eighties. They still one one, the nineties, they still one. Once it's like. I went out this thirty teams and competition. these guys that went at once. Every fuckin ten years. I think the tooth. the nineties was the first decade they hadn't one, a cup. since the nineteen hundred say one and one in the teens, the twenties emmy, numerous teens twenties thirty's, forty fifty sixty seventy eight He's no ninety, ninety three they want. I want to fuck my argument Two thousand, if they want to when I hope. almost a whole fuckin century of winning at least one championship. A decade holy shit. always should everybody they all Sports nerdy can barely skate backwards is fuckin. Kicking out over any

the red sox are winning and what's great, is nobody's really noticing, because the yankees continue to win. They have such a huge lead on us for what's fucking great thing is. This is still the wild card. So far the winning the yankees could do. The red Sox gets make the fucking players come in there a break their fucking hearts. Hats. When suddenly I could be the suppliers of twenty years ago. Nineteen years ago, a fucking nuts is up. I this team, this team, they get this shit Jesus Christ the red sox at an off center pitch in certain good davies's? devers, I was on call and divas differences. Fucking hit some home runs. I think it's going to be a writer by the way, I have to say the oakland a's uniform might be the best in baseball. And I have the yankees, the classic pinstripe or whatever.

which is a great uniform and a great logo. you know, but I think a lot of it is associated too with the success. Players which the part of it, but I gotta tell you: if you don't know shit about baseball there, can green with the yellow, when the white of the oakland days is unreal,. you know when you combine that with the fact that I feel the oakland raiders like the best fucking, uniform and logo in all sports. you know, especially with a white jersey with the silver numbers. spoken incredible. Both of them played in oakland and now it teams will ones are gone. teams, are gonna end up in vegas who the fuck is gonna go? a goddamned baseball game in LAS vegas. I don't know about double football yeah. He's gonna sell out eight games the gene.

Gamblers love the bet on fuckin football. That was a no brainer, but then again, who would thought hockey would make it fuck in vegas out enough. I have no idea, but it's not tonight. They gonna fuckin, move. but such bullshit to that really is fuckin. Bullshit, it's like the guide, trades away, soccer team every year or tries to win. With like not doing anything like spending, no fucking money. and now you know. The fans are gonna pay for. ogilvy vulcan stadium are alive and you have a stadium. Your fuckin can't. It really blows my mind that they can fuckin do that to cities people can do take over the food supply. Poor shit, no water supply dumb shit, the fucking ocean. You know.

fire hundreds of people at a corporation. While you take it fuckin nine figure bonus. Hold a city hostage build a stadium were fuckin, leaving. You can do all that shit. Nobody gets a fork trouble. then you send out one tweet as an individual, not doing anything and they fuckin destroy your life. You cellular has always believed her connection is the greatest gift of. Ah that's. Why we're giving everyone one line for thirty four? Ninety nine, a month with unlimited data, this holiday season, that's right! One line, unlimited data for just thirty four. Ninety nine a month, that's more than a great idea! That's locally gone connection from: u s cellular limited time offer terms apply visit. U s! Cellular dot com for details! You a cellular, is america's locally grown wireless visit. You are cellular located at twenty twenty nine congress, parkway in athens, Master class- everyone you know,

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nah an nah hundreds of video lessons from a hundred plus of today's most brilliant minds are available anytime anywhere on I, a west android desktop apple tv, amazon, fire, tv and rogue, who I We recommend you check it out, get unlimited access to every master class and a monday morning, podcast listener, and as of monday morning, podcast listener. You get. Fifteen percent off the annual membership, go to masterclass dot com, slash bro now Master class dot com, slash poorer for fifteen percent of master class. I'm right, a piano lessons when I just failing miserably the first time I lived in l to piano lessons for two or three times a week, Stop what those things. cause. There's always there's a lot of pianos out there you'll notice that, like you, always walk in like fuck, I wish I wish I everytime you see like fuck. I wish I stayed stayed with that.

Sit down right now I bill marine grant groundhog day. A few hits. I know how play couple songs. I could play the beginning to. The journey song. don't stop believing. I think I do our yacht rock. Liner, richie easy like sunday morning come with to its people. I'm starting to fuck with Chicago saturday in the park which, for the longest time I thought was about drug addiction falling looked up the irix. I thought the issue about a guy going to the park. You know Sort of enjoying what he was saying, the homeless guy. You know

The sad day was singing boss and say the black It was the fourth of July. people laugh people saying in man selling ice cream, singing italian tell saw and I've been weighed in such a long time. Unlike wait for what the sad day. It's easy meekness dealer. I just never understood it as I pointed out the fuckin. time flies by. And then the that's a second verse. I always thought it was. something about a fog. Two different word on what the fuck is. I looked it up. Yesterday, forget what use I thought he was singing the word fog and I thought he was like you know. Now his life was go and buy, Because a somewhat chicago and even their happy of songs, you know

when Terry Kath was soon the ban. There was like a melancholy tone: This should always felt like gas. I know what it was felt like heavy, like it isn't like a light. I'm trying to think. Of the other songs or whatever. But there was something about the horns would come in and all that type of shit and just always gotta meet. Speaking of that, the coins, and all of that, unlike sort of minor cords and shit my daughter is ridiculously into charlie brown. And I can tell you this, like there's no fucking way. This is because it's all like what the fuck happened so that to thy so many a day kids valentine's day. You go to school with that I can never say this word.

Attache attaches Attaches a fucking briefcase right. because he's anticipating, he's gonna get all these violent has. Now. I don't know why he's doing this, because nothing in his life has ever worked out. Like this, kid is a sad sacks, sad sack right, He's on the mount rushmore says sexually. The poor bastard shows up with his. I don't know, spoiler alert right. He doesn't get any fucking valentines. they keeps checking? What that, though, the kiddo place piano. Promoting a master classroom, schroeder right You ve check any with dummies like now, charlie I'll, let you know no one's written, you yet ace. Fuckin sit in their expecting the world to show him love when I just never see people always yeah and I'm corner a blockhead. He doesn't really have the good knight. Your friends like I sit in a fucking watching with chinese guys a night, you friends yet,

Watch in punch one of these kids in the face and get a little respect A little big headed cunt right, but he never does it so the fucking little kid he never gets a valentine. I really a bad from Kosovo. Last second guess who's mailbox and he looks in like me, there's gonna, be one office was a modern day Pixar movie He would look in and there, but be one. but this was a dish it was made, but we were fuckin fight in vietnam. You know They'd cured polio only like ten years ago, people fucking. laying life was harder. I don't know what the deal was. He fucking opens the mailbox, there's no valentine and there he gets pest, He slams is fuckin briefcase down on the mailbox and they go The kick the post, and he hurts his foot.

Somehow they brought it around where he was sought, a happy towards the end, but like when it was valentine's day and he's going to school, and he had that fuckin briefcase and you just know what's gonna happen. But you still have the hope just like he does like when he goes to kick the football every time you or maybe You know. maybe we'll get one he won't get any and then in the end maybe he'll get one no. he doesn't get shit And we're gonna take you slowly and painfully through this whole fuckin journey. it's funny, because might my daughter doesn't like really intend scenes and movies or anything like that? Even these pixar movies,. Specially if anybody dies or whatever the fuck, you know that lion king thing like she just doesn't like it, and she just tells me to shut it off, but for some reason she can sit. Through the unbelievable depressing episodes.

of charlie brown. I will tell you- and I will go to my grave saying this one- a great fuckin scenes and animation history is when Sally yet fuckin linus for ruining. her hollowing. Could she didn't, go and get me candy? Instead, she sat a pumpkin patch. Waiting for the fuckin. The great pumpkin. and she was weighed in such a long time for the great pumpkin then she just let's line, is have you fuckin. She would she was called him a blockhead, but she was like base you fucking asshole,. It could have been going out there getting candy and you win any. You know dragged me out to this bullshit. I fucking believed you and there was no goddamn great pumpkin, and now everybody's gonna laugh at me. what two lines discredit ages? He sat there and took it. He knew he was wrong.

Is it not a hare issues and that fuckin show you know massive amounts of fuckin allopathy, show me charlie brown, so he went to like chemo. My Jesus cricket, you in cuba, key use, given one fuckin valentine side, The way that is the podcast on my way out to wilt bear To do some shows and then I'm going up to were don't show up failed in upstate new york, where I am against the same place where they had now woodstock didn't I always open up for me. That's what he said I ended new jersey at this. be theater. I played. Back in all five or six on the open, anthony. traveling virus tour. Now that doesn't seem too long ago, but that was like

That was sixteen years ago. We get a bill, europe, Jesus Christ. I

okay, so that's the podcast! We get some interlude music here man and then we're going to play a bonus episode of a thursday afternoon. Just before friday, monday morning, podcast from a thursday afternoon a few years ago, alright have a great weekend. You can sit on sea on monday for the hey. What's going on, it's bill burn it's the Monday morning, podcast from Monday june, sixteenth, two thousand and fourteen

How the hell are you? How you doing here, Are you enjoy in the balkans. When does the summer start officially, I know it. In twenty something I'll tell you about the hope that global warming is kind of I gotta watch the volume this week. Ok, I have to keep a low fucking key. Because I'm actually recording arm sunday june fifteenth salt lake city. I pointed to pronounce salt lake city manhood Around here and I gotta keep my yeah my vote, dockers. I dont want to offend. Yet whatever mormon is next door and the hope that hotel room right? What's his fuckin, twenty, two wives or whatever the hell? They do. You know Why, when you come out here to you tat, you think what you gonna see. Is you guys a bunch of mormons right, one

The round dress, like the run little house and the prairie, and you know one guy with, like you know four wives, five wives, a dog around me time to point out to you tolerate finally dawned on me that if you have five wives, ok, And you know each one of wants to have like two kids, the average woman wants a couple of kids right I'd like a boy. A girl, you know one of each year, looking at you like you, possess that sort of like trick shots sperm, are you playing a game, a horse you gotta make the shots mobile air and over here one of age. Any move on to the next round, so that right there If you have five wives, one of each right, if you're going to have kids, wants a boy and a girl you're. Looking at ten kids you're going to have ten kids five wives, I mean how many rob house you have to buy. Basically what I'm saying is Rees wife, never run it. one of these people with all the wives is there's no way they can afford to live in the city you know you'd have to,

but you have to read out a whole floor of a fuckin condom. Girls. die scraper their condominium a co up if you will So that's what it has asked where they are made, that there are there over the fuckin hill. What the hell! So I guess I'm never going to of sea, probably say all bill. What what do you run into when you go salt lake city. It's absolutely beautiful bit of a bit of a scary landing here. The city itself seems to be surrounded on at least three sides by a mountain. You know like the old them, Broncos horseshoe shape stadium. Where you know I'm gonna- kick to feel go. You could see the parking lot on one side, and then I saw was a bunch of fuckin orange indeed maniacs, on the other, By the way, I never understood why they did that. horseshoe shaped stadium, I just always struck me such a half, ass job words disappoint. You just finished a fucking thing you know, or just keep

ages on both sides. Have it be symmetrical yet I see no, somebody builds a lot of shit and sucks that he's good at it. Buddy subsidies be wants to do everything himself and protecting ident this person, but they do read? Did it I can kitchen and I walked in and I'm low my ball in the cabinets and you can see Clearly, one of the cabinets is like an eighth of an inch or a half an inch like It just looks weird you can tell them longer than the other one and the guy's a guy, and I don't like cemetery The symmetry with with thick in my head battle, who is not in the cemetery. I can see in landscaping it doesn't look natural if everything symmetrical on both sides. I get that, but when you building something this you're, not a dissymmetry ism for all. My construction. Feds are people in the country, because construction arts isn't what there

persons really saying that they I'd like to measure or they don't like to go. I can fix their mistakes, so they just sort of power. Had that's basically what this fuckin thing look like an all. I'm thinking is: ok, that's what the cabinets look like. What is the electrical look like you know I merely want to get the fuck out of here but anyways. Let me back up for a second here, So when you come out here to utah yes, so they got, they got like It feels like it's. It's surrounded on at least two sides. I like that window. Football stadium. Then I saw it. I guess everything on a tear it out. They had bleed. on both sides, nothing in either end zone and it just look cold is fuck. Do you want to the game so. Let's you know, and especially this time of year, when it sir, to get hot out. I don't know why

like a tosses, you around a little bit as as you come in for a landing and thus some on the plane and this fuckin lady. In front of me might have had the worst tattoo I've ever seen in my life, and it went all the way across her back. It was like this. It was green ink There was some sort of tree. For some sort of something it's like Jesus Christ, we get it. You know you fight, you like nature,. I dont understand like I like the bruins, but I would never get a giant be put on my back. What did you do that stands for bill on the roads, It stands for fuckin moron just a horribly horribly, like you, My parents left one. I was four years old just drawn like my buddy, who sells meth, you know this tattoo, and I've noticed that there are large

That is already a lot of bad fuckin tat to solve your. If you're on that show what is fix my tattoo tattoo. Stakes whatever the hell is that Will you guys always draw the flowers what you said to me: SAM fuckin daffy, dug in the ass, whatever somebody decided to get in there but check right come the unita I mean I already I mean you know what why would you just further fuck the thing up? I guess, though, that I guess because you're trying to draw something over that that makes it creative. I mean, I think that they should just parity. A bunch of people in here who tat. You removal, you know. You sound like you, nobody dropped a tax and what that flat piece of wood underneath it just have the tattoo removal machine and you set up a tent like mash. You just have all these people come in with their awful good tat to And you just remove them.

And then you immediately taken into another ten start showing a mamma. You not just video footage of what a good tattoo looks like you're, our maybe some art or maybe get a plane ticket any anyway. The travel outside it outside of these fuckin tree, so he stopped brought him on their bodies and I've being to judge metal. Am I well? Maybe I am. I dont you notice is. This really has nothing to do with the fuckin to women. I saw you talk with those tattoo, so I judge all fuckin. You know what, half a million women that live in the greater salt lake city area has really Can deal with it has to do with the fact that I am taking a special a stand. Special. This friday night in atlanta at the tabernacle three theatre are two shows

Ah, I'm gettin fuck Nancy, some lashing out of people. Not so I apologise to you know the ninety nine point: five percent of salt lake women that don't have fuckin green tattoos I am also being caught because I haven't booze since the day I came back from france which was a burly teeth come on up one fuckin sixty days or whatever I'm workin out. I look good, but I get out this forest best. I could do it. Forty six or cattle psychic, crazy. Yeah yeah I just wanna, take taken fuckin thing, so I get to more shows tonight. You're in salt lake city at wise guys, which I gotta tell you. Men underrated. Underrated for the weak, wiseguy comedy club.

salt lake city utah and from what I heard Joe rogan coming out here in the next week or so, I guess David Tell was out here and one on robins podcast and just great pot casting you know and Davis. Raving about this place to Joe called up the next day, and I guess you gotta booking out here and now. So I don't know when I got it. I can see why David TAT was raving about it. Just it's perfect. I can set a fuckin perfectly When a club that the ceiling is at the exact rate height where people are seated around you the way they are the checks. The whole fuckin thing is just great. if I was actually get to design a comedy club. Did you just ask that from your fuckin elliptical machine, you know what I would do. I would do everything that they got there At wiseguy, wise is the only way. The only thing I would change I would have. I would design it with a green room is right off the stage that if it was a mean crowd.

Maybe only you almost got into a physical confrontation with somebody. You have the option of not having to walk the gauntlet and go through the crowd. Step right off stage and a right to the green roger, much like the punchline in atlanta, which is great, although you can't lock the doors far as I know, but it still nice there used to be a comedy club in new york city called comics. And that thing was a fuckin fortress. I guess you could run through the garden but even then there was a door down the end of the hall, you we walked off stage and you step down and merely you are in a hallway. If you went to the right, you could go out and sailor the crowd or you could go to the left and you could disappear into the meanwhile, and you know this week, come on out after shows just because it up. I got a special come up and down in I go out. You shake a bunch of hands. God knows people did, god knows what is all over there I can answer after you shake a bunch

and I can't get sick this week so sought out. That's what I've been doing this week. been eating is perfect, as I know how to eat it off. I know that's, the key thing is, I know via because I've only partially read up on nutrition, but I'm trying to go had you the whole time about here and a bunch of beans, and I'm fuckin shit I get tat is my pet If about veggie restaurants, two things one. When you look up vegetarian restaurant, the amount of times that it comes up with I guess She explained to me: why do I always get like chinese restaurants and tie food restaurants it to me It's like! Ok! I get that there's no meat in the dish, but the salt is through the fuckin roof and don't get me wrong. I love thai food alright

chinese food, I don't know, I don't know. Johnny showed the little shady and my book but like You know I, like you, that's that shit, you, you know when you dislike the fuckin who gives a fuck Let's eat this food, you know it's like going out when I asked fuckin siri, their robot lady there, my phone, the arrow, as you said: vegetarian restaurants, salt lake city, like all the sun, all these, these giant. entire restaurants come up and dislike. Can't you I'll try need healthy, I don't need it you're fuckin noodles was salt pork over. That's not what the fuck I'm trying to do. I'm trying get down my fighting weight here, so anyway, so then I gotta go unlike vague and restaurants. That type of thing is my petty with vigour. fuck in restaurants, the god damn things I have weird hours are right:

It is of em within walking distance in my hotel, and neither one of em is open sunday needed one of them's open every falkenberg joints and he had a fuckin colorado springs is open, at the vegan restaurants, how come they're not open on sundays. You know a lot lotta carnivores would say that's because to awake, take care of the rest, Saw daycare slogan get yet nothing gives you less, do what you ve been eating and a healthy way. That's it I'm so fuckin sick of that shit. People talk by electric cars. Where do they go up the hill? You know. That'S- why I'm really I'm starting to were I'm starting up, away from the whole conspiracy theory thing. I think the whole thing just works itself, yellow this just enough people out there that don't know shit myself Claudia Jesus Christ,

ten on that list, and you just did states are bad. It's really not like group of people live in under a mom. It's just but your mouth, breathing, morons or not, when people who just I'll fuckin know anything. You know like ve been talking about. I want to learn how to fly. Helicopter and people keep saying to us. You're too, that man he's a fallen out of the sky, all the time that there really all the time Everybody's. Ok, with that. just every other merrick. Come in to work today: helicopter fell out of the fuckin sky. half a tour again I mean don't get me wrong. Fuckin happens. It happened in scotland this. Last year, one fell on a bar whore, the story by mean, obviously to me shit happens. Ok, chief shit happens on the ground. To it, Times a day to people step on a rake right,

and you leave the leaves out there and burn up your grass. I don't think it does, The fuck and engine cuts out, yet all that shit, you fucking dog, you just like a stone. No, you, don't you doubt Jesus fucking Christ. Look it up. Look it up right, you fuckin, auto rotate. Some say that, like I know how to do it, although Have watched people on you to do it's pretty sporty yeah? It's pretty fuckin impressive, but whatever would have looked like I'm by brain It's all over the fuckin place this week. I can't stand the weight the week of to do my special right. I'm I'm ready right now, I'm where you sit near my boxes and mighty Sure I'm ready to throw some slack. In short, if I walked out my hotel room and they just

Asked me a might get my began. My special nothing would make me happier. I write It's like I, it's like I just want to get out there in fact. Do this goddamn thing, because this it's over or red faces on vacation, A vacation everybody for the first time ever undertaken taken the sub basically taken the summer. I forgot a couple, a gigs here or there, but I am a diamond it back. You know Take it off the summer I mean I'm not going to be jumping on a bunch of airplanes. I'm going to be a course in the comedy club is out here in l a trying to build up my next hour before my next special comes out, but I'll be sleeping in my own bed. I'm going to be getting drunk in my own house. Not all the weight that I took off from my special enable had restaurants. I would have a great time becoming billy fat face again. right now, malaria, William, Joe ghettos, getting a lot of people,

say that you don't get too fuckin skinny. It's like. If I lifted up my shirt and use da. The horrors show that's underneath you're, just used to me being really out of shape now molly kind of out of shape a right, but believe me, Calvin Klein, will not be calling me ever. You understand which really disappoints me, because I think it's about time. They did so of a forty six year old red headed male short was okay, so if they are listening I'll, throw my fucking hat in the ring, how bad how bed, with their stock, pledge Yeah I'll never know because I used to watch, watch top model show with the euro. May I gotta go the middle ground, so it's like if you're gonna watch, some reality. At least I can look at some. You know beautiful nine for women walking around

the look on her face. Like you know, somebody peed in their own right. nah. so many of them they were beautiful bodies, but the faces they were fucking, weird, so Finally said like we know what the fuck is, what why what is what her fucking does. She looks like she put on an astronaut helmet that was small yet I would she left it on for, like twenty four hours ages, just pop the thing off right now,. You know and you just like. Well, you know tyro likes. She likes them She thinks they should be a little weird looking. What what? Why is that so she doesn't feel intimidated. You know, what's your point, she's, been on the cover of sports illustrated. Was she trying to help other people because people used to make fun of her forehead? You know I love that people if an attire banks, his forehead, you know like if she came walking up to write,

Do that thing where one leg, stepping over the other leg, for some dumb reason, I you know something I have to be honest with you, no matter how good a woman looked if they came Walking up to me like that doing this tap and over each other for each and every other fora fuck, I'm trying to say right over left left over right with that look on it. faced with the hair blowing. That's look so amazing if that I, We have remained in real life, I would be sitting there looking at them do as ever see young frankenstein, I remember gene wilder's going it's a lie As you know, in france the stones. This kind of signal looking at him like the fuck, is wrong with this dude that that's how I would be looking at. I might say, europe that did not beautiful, but whatever the fuck make it too many left her answer

I got to this was talking about we're lookin o, yet. So. I I'm weird looking I'm a lookin fucker Maybe you could have on all that is at work, yeah guess it does work. Maybe it wouldn't work. a women into we're. Looking guys. And not for my experience, the little kid that was kind of you know what are they into they want. They want security. That translates the money, because that's how the fuck a world works, so they really horse. I don't know when we return. I'm alright. I'm went away pause here now. Actually, don't it by advertising, so I'm some after recorded later and drop in answer right now. I have to pause so I have a place to fuck it The centre right. Legal zalm, everyone, America, was built by innovators and dreamers people.

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a law, firm, legal, some dot com, discount code, bur. Lastly, bug leisurely hulu, as everyone you ve, probably hulu on your computer, who plus is so much more with. Although plus you can watch current seasons, episodes of your favorite shows like modern family, the daily show in scandal and watch it the episode of shows like nashville loss and doktor who you get ad free movies and kid shows to now more than ever. There is so much the watch. Taken control with hulu plus two stream. These shows and thousands more as much as you want whenever you want hulu plus works on your computer, your smartphone tv row coup. I'll tv, I'm sorry you're, smart tv, not smartphone, smart tv, rogue, who apple tv export play station pretty much any streaming device you already on. You can even watch on your phone are ipad by the canon, while

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I read that sometime in the future- So, anyway, I've been la Europe with my fucking aid? DE I been trying to learn how to involve just work out more efficient, Fuckin whatever so, I've been eaten right, no type of thing and I've got into all these. I like climate, the rope and don't pull up some shit and ice hold onto a couple of youtube videos course don't have em up here, but I definitely send the links them to andrew to have him up here. Couple these home, home gems you gotta have in the garage and dawn. And and wonders why it's actually part once the three parts series with this guy teaches you how to do a muscle up which is based we ve ever saw somebody do the pull up and they basically go past action. Up to the chest and then basically get to the point where they do a dip at the top of the bar that the other half of it.

It's because you don't have to go down because you start. I've just explained that in a completely confusing way, you know what I mean you shoot the bar. And then you push yourself up with your arms sales. I'm so than straight at the top of the bar, and I remember the first time I tried to do that. If you could have listened to the the discreet. Number one. What's face william wallace, was getting his entrails yanked out. Ok remember that noise, MEL gibson was making. If you could fuckin take that audio and then turn it up to You know when they do the chipmunks holiday, good. That's what I sounded like when I try to do it aside from fact that I am completely lack the strength, my technique, I didn't understand that very little of it, is your arms going past that that bar and I'm not even try to begin to exploit well

I have sought to be funny on this. When I try to explain it s. Basically, your comment when you put your pulling yourself thought, be sort of explode up and he got yet the legs are a little bit frontier and then right, as you get your chest up to the bar, you do a quick set up in the air I swear to god, which causes your legs laying down like down past you like a fool, can pendulum in you actually roll up onto the bar. So it's really it's yours, sitting up and then your legs swinging off montoni through that get you up over the bar and then your arms or positions. Two were too then pushed self up, and it's like out. That's why I was spoken up, so I figure I figure. If I just you know, train do one that for two months over the summer trying to get my time make out right and then I somehow you know jump into the cocoon pool to be able to do it by twenty. Sixteen, what you think.

If we do the human flag, one of those four these are just fascinate. What people that have that kind of strength, and there I found you just click on that, among other things that they suggest. I clicked on like I have others and all of a sudden. I was watching these guys climbing what was considered the hardest rock face to climb in the world, and these I can guys I mean I bet you about doing. Polyps Europe, I got my whole hand around. Rather these guys get like that. You know that little Why did the topic a finger? They hang on like that and they jump up to a thing and they like for their fingers that last little joint a grab some little crevice and I'm tellin you they reach up and they grab it and in the people on the ground. Here. If all the way on the ground, you hear the guy jumps up and grabs. It is here that they do that the whole fucking way up. They got a grip called the pinch.

Grip, just imagine, holding a dictionary early thick book right, any just sort of would hold it straight down. You know on either side of it. It is holding it by the binding yeah like that kind of a grip like the lobster grip and the thing is like it's. it's it's faced up and down. What's the fuckin word perpendicular, I have no idea It looks like a nose coming out of the fucking cliff and they jump up, and grab one of those and then just pinch with their fuck in hand. and then they get one little to crack below it, just holding that- and we will. Jeanne. These guys do this shit. I swear to god. It's like these guys. I mean I don't know like if you ever Adam in prison. It's like how long could you keep them in prison? This you ve got him in the yard. You'd have to have a fucking scope on them at all times, because they would you fuckin run over to the corner, where,

one wall meets together. Wall unusable ninety degrees turn they just get up all the at the top of it You know, I think, be right. You face like that. Fuckin grizzly bear that ran up that tree. The scene that youtube video, this guy, Sidney is in a fuckin tree like a bow and arrow trained This black bear in the black bear, looks up and see them and within two seconds it runs up the tree. Storm and is above them, and they sit near, like what do what the fuck holy shit, what the fuck they like freak it out and dumb. I dunno why I was rooting for the bay I wanted the bear to mall that guy. I just think it's fucked to go up, should bear or an Elk or a moose. I mean: can you just keep it with cows and chickens? Isn't that enough fish all the fish to get fuck and killed? I swear to god.

I swear to god the more the more I look into that shit. It's just brutal, where I got hiking in california when I like and by the way I do wear short shorts with aerobics socks. When I hike. There's a fuckin mountain line. The mountain line in the canyon and that's been it can me out, and they have these cameras set up all over the place and over the last couple of years, have taken pictures of them. They just took a picture of the thing recently and I swear to god it looks horrible and what, Their speculating had happened happened is the thing is. eating coyotes that rats than eat the red poison that people put out Now to kill the rats and if saw this thing. You know I'm terrified of getting malt. Ok. Terrified of the ocean didn't even by shark, getting pulled out by the way

tied and getting malt any of that fuckin shit, any shit therein all me I just Imagine when one of them catch is your wife I can write just reaches out and grab you watch. in turn. You like this rag doll, how little fucking control you have your ability to fight back. It's like. Don't you frightened fucking Edward scissor heads but fast euro like Freddy krueger, on all feet just that alone. If you get scratch by a fuckin house care it fuck and kills Imagine a god they're my line, just rabbit you pulling you over to it fuckin, mild god feeling that breath on your neck. Jesus Christ, I'm fucking,

terrified of those things that just amount lie, which is like a house cat compared with tiger right, No, but I saw that thinks faces just like that's that's terrible spoken terrible man so how much I get all peter- and here I am- How can a bottom all over the fuckin place this week? so anyways. I really want to get you guys. Those clips, because this ray clips. I want to show you that have really inspired me to try and get back, and you know I don't know, you just stop walking around with this fifty pounds. A pizza beer wait just fuckin sick of it. You know, have knocked off Like half of it, I just don't understand how far down I gotta go to have a flag stomach again. Katy would do it once you big ones, get that fuckin belly. It's just you try to fuckin, lose the weight and you just lose muscle and a matter. You eat a whole goddamned chicken, somehow you fuckin

I'm not gonna shrink and your bellies just gonna be sit near laughing at you jiggling. You know. You're funny actually got a fucking. Email is weak. Yeah now I know you guys think Jesus bill. You have made a major body issues yeah I do well. You know what why don't you get get get get our the fucking car the central premium blend when you do that, and they get yourself a fuck. I recount, let me tell you what kind of body image is you're gonna have people on exactly nice to that, They start off nice, a really funny shit, but what The deal with and then you end up, get like I'll fuck, and everyone noticed that about myself. So I always hear somebody says faction, bones yogi on french for william actually knew that one. Should I tell you. Ram off. I am a long time listener and I love the show I am, big guy and fat. Shaming work works. It really works last

september, I was sneaking a pizza in my car, while listening to the show, and at another rant about fat people and you basically describe exactly what I was doing like you. Somehow watching me eat it made me laugh. uncontrollably and I decided to get serious about losing weight. I quit booze which is something your show inspired me to do, and aid healthy and exercise twice a day, I was off the bottle from september until February. In spending the holidays. Sober was quite a challenge, but I got my weight down from three tended to fifty four dough gratulation What is that? Let's do the math here for this guy sixty one pounds times: five miles, a capillaries for every fuckin pound. That's true hundred and five miles of less of it, capillaries at your heart has to beat every time. Isn't that wonderful, we'll be right back

doctors, sorry, everybody. I was pleased with my progress and I started working out less and resume drinking till mid April. When I wait myself at two. Seventy three, so I gained ten pounds in about two and a half months of drinking. I was shocked, therefore, I felt a hall again and in an way to forty three. Now holy shit. He says my goal. the way to turn before I drank again. Please continue. To make criticising. Oh, please can you to criticise the fat ass is because you do it in a hilarious yet respectful way, thank you for your help. Do that's great man. You know it's great about what you did was a lot of people if they went three tended to fifty four, they started you no going back to their bad habits. You then no gain it all back and then some surprise you weren't three twentysomethings. So the fact that you actually yeah got back on this. EL, the two, seventy three, Shows I got a lotta willpower, then you dropped another third.

after that Are you down altogether to forty three? That's fifty seven and and is sixty seven pounds. Do that's amazing mad at me where'd you go back to both. What I would suggest is drinking. Whisky or scotch me. You know I drank advice on the rocks of something just it's kind of that's like the vaporize or of boozing. You just. Get right to it. Like all those check drinks not only get the you're you suck it down. You get a brutal fuckin, hang over first of all, and then it just all this extra bullshit. You know roman cokes yeah, you have five roman coax. Would you ever sit down a drink? Five coax I could barely finish, won't have to, whilst second feel my stomach expected like I'm at some hot dog, eaten contest so yeah. go, I would go back to that and then.

I would somehow limits you're intake of it, which I gotta be honest with you. I don't know how to do because ass, we king opposing ok, there's that way for you. is a deal. I basically said I wasn't gonna drink until my special site, I'll be down with my special friday night. I was kind of thinking like well, you know what I want to close out june. You now cause I didn't thankfully entire mother February or may- and if I get june, then I'm kind of balance Right I drank january march and april: did drink february may and june. Some canada I can get the young and Yang being a drug dealer. Actually, being silver, but the thing is, is the last weekend in june,

when I'm at I'm at the mirage in las vegas, and it's not gonna be hard not to drink, you know cause, I don't. I don't gamble, you know what I mean, I'm too fucking old. to go, hang out and do that type of shift. But if I'm going to booze, I would just go back and drink by myself in the hotel room, which is I'm not going to do. However, excuse me had to take Myka water there and Coincidentally- and I don't know how this happened- the all in tore starring Joe barred nick, jason law had it paul don't stay up from new jersey version. Gonna be there on the sunday night, I'm their friday and saturday. I can't fucking believe it They're, can it be right across the street? You know: what am I supposed to do? What am I spoke, do what what I'm not going to hang out with them, and you know it funny, that's going to be like june, twenty eighth or twenty ninth

and I thought want what am I going to do. You know I gotta do with so go over there and the attainments funny as I've been dying for similar high life. There's something about the bottle. I think the beer taste that good this is the best bottle ever you now listen. The fact of lady and there's a part of me to relate to you, sir. I don't wanna go back, I miss it man I thought, love drinking but I like how I feel not drinking but I don't know where does ice? diversity before what the fuck I said about the devil. In me, the devil is. devil is his its ugly head. I came up what the fuck I said to him, but I feel like I need the what I'm hoping to do. Just get absolutely plastered with them and then immediately go back to work. What have not being an idiot

and actually doing these work out. So I was telling you guys about any might think obsessed with this stuff, but I am I mean who wants to be a fat fuck? Nobody, you know, don't you want to be gonna call should do about our had. I don't give a shit what you guys. You know you're a bunch of adults, yeah, I fetching myself I'll, fuck type it in fact works! All right! Let's get beyond this! Let's, let's move in a different direction,. Let's right another way, What we do that I haven't even talked about anything whatsoever that the stock little bit right. The foremost a crown, the yellow kings, the kings claim the crowd. Second, In three years you know where it is, I thought cops we're gonna when they were going to say that they were going to be a dynasty. Ok, if they want because that would have been two thousand ten two thousand Fourteen thirteen two thousand fourteen so they would have one want they want once in five years and the same

a competitive with all the free agents. Signings all bullshit, three and five years would now be considered a dynasty, so guess who's in line for next year, the unthinkable, the area kings a couple years ago in west timor, that for fucking years ago the Like king fair base was taken a we ever gonna fuckin when one I bet, if you talk to their families, they will probably going. I do. I just want to see him when, at once they just at once in my lifetime, I'm gonna be. happy, yadda, yadda, yadda, yadda yadda, and here we are for. I've short years later. If they were again next year. That would be Let's see they would want it to. thousand twelve, then chicago fourteen fifteen days one three and four years where they gave the patriots dynasty. So that would definitely consider dicey nano unbelievable. What a fuckin team

you know, I also got to say, adds up to the rangers because everybody thought like the east was a lot weaker than they were and despite the fact that they lost and five games, I mean. Three of those ranger losses were in overtime. I definitely think the kings clearly the better team, but I just Can I get a broken strand? I was happy that the east in a week get absolutely shell dealing tough game. It was, if you arrange a fan to watch. Was that game are games, free when they lost three, you not what they really just got shut down at the game or I miss, because I was working and I think this one ranges what you want, but whatever was great the great seas and Jimmy I am actually tweeted something where he said. You know something to the I tweeted add something to the effect that once again, the image of players just showed in just saying that, basically, They were the best players down. I could be someone who says that I mean I think they are

I understand if it's not your sport, but I'm telling you it's fuckin insane, but, however, I have also been watching the NBA finals and I actually watched both conference finals and I've been enjoying that too, and about them spurs look in the club. saddam and you guys know whether they did or not not because the fuckin afternoon here, but my posters sat on a who the fuck knows. All I know is. It's been amazing to watch the spurs, fuckin grating, habitat leonard kid Jesus Christ. You know I like about him. the one click that I saw. He shows to the arena. Looking like he's, gonna go play, basketball, as opposed to everybody else who for some reason show they show up like they're, they're gonna Can for clothes on somebody's house? Why? they were the suit. It's like you, ve got away. This suits than you wanna. Do it like you,

What frazier get and I'm using that reference, because I actually yeah maybe get a little hollywood on you, but I'm doing it because promoting friend of minds are new documentary, Michael rapid. It was nice enough to invite me to the premier of screening of visa he's got a new dawn, mercury out cold weather garden was eaten based on a book by the same name. About the seventy and seventy three new york connection. The ship teams are basically the building of that championship. Team others will not lot overlap when I actually you don't just. some of the rangers history. The same thing where. The next just won't even respected, and that's it. think, just like the new york rangers like right around when play off time came around madison square garden, also brought the circus and in the circle would sell more tickets, Then the ranges of the next word and

so they would have to play like one year. Did the new york rangers? I forget it with a fucking, we're playing. I bet they were playing the detroit peasant judgments that should the tree redwings job in sports here, the idea redwings in the stanley cup final in the circus was in town, madison square garden. Wouldn't let them play their home games in it's a square guards. The actually had a play. I believe it was in may believe guards were the toronto maple leafs played they consider that somewhat of a home game because leaf fans hated wings fans and they thought that we finns maybe would show up and roof the rangers There's a lot of that type, the stuff you really should see. If you get a chance, I don't know, I don't have a premiere date yet, but I will try to get him on the pod cast again long time. Listeners remember his last is only visit the plot just worried trash me for the giants, beat the patriots and super born on new york fans. Acosta George enjoyed joy that go fuck yourself, but it's

a fucking amazing documentary and one funniest things about it without giving anything away is lost to wrap up trying debate these guys into trashing boston. and their fans it's fuckin hilarious as a definite get out it's going to be, and he did. It was one of those e s, p, n, at one thirty for thirty sixty for sixty, I dunno what the hell it is, but it's amazing spot when the garden was Eden. Alright, is that my horn out enough things this week. You know about this. I got another one for you that actually watch down What did legally paid my I've dollars. I watch David spades. New stand up special called my fate problems. Definite. Check that one out what I love the body was I actually yo it. Still his you know, classic David spay, but I felt it was really personal stuff, guy. It's too easily his best specialities ever put out of your family has or a new fan are curious band

definitely worth the five bucks that's one of my. it was things I want to see that I live at some point, but anyway, Let's get back to the yards, get back to the park here and what else What else have I been doing here then? What some world cup sakharov, my fuckin tv, just the hotel room so watch in france. They were. three not three thousand twice to zero However, the forty six zero and I I get it to the world cup. I think it's fuckin awesome and I do think so There is a beautiful sport. I just don't understand why the Michael Michael, that I've always had with their fuckin sport. I don't give a shit about goals shit. I watch hockey. I still understand its think its awesome? I just don't understand why every fuckin to me. If somebody collapses to the ground like they blew out there, a and all he did was get kicked in the shed and they have a shin guard there. now. I'm not saying that I wouldn't collapse of the ground, but I'm not a professional athletes. You watch

how can you have see those Can maniacs kick the other fighter with that part of their legs. I know they come in at an angle, but it still this shit now thinking tough and their leg up. To do. To do that, you know I dont understand why. These guys can you make them? fuckin guard go all the way around their legs, so we can keep the movement going. So I don't. I me I've done my idea. Of watching a sport is not every two minutes. I see a man a groan. fuckin man in the fatal position with a low, on his face, like he's gonna start crying, and then somebody comes running up to another player, gets right in his face. Like he's going to punch him and he's like oh great, there's going to be a fight, and then he south is yellow card and sticks it up in the air. Like he's in some benny hills, sketch. other than that I loved the scarves. The singing people go an absolute, You fucking nuts, one they score. Enjoy all. Oh, that's all continue watching it, and this year's actually great too. Now that day,

they got it away from those crazy horns, whatever the fuck in those things will call. Jesus was fully fucks column in her. Who is it? Oh Jesus hang on. The lovely, nearly everybody near, I'm recording my podcast, can I call you right back. Ok, sweetie anyways world, forty three minutes and I could tell by the way she said, ok, that I need to talk to her she's, ok, oh gee judge I was I talk of world cup soccer, so I have no idea who is gonna win that all I know is. I think, that of europe gotta watch enough socket to tell it to know that the united states is definitely with going to make the final issue, if not when the whole fucking thing, ok,.

look, I know they're, not gonna wanna, but I just I want them. when it so bad because it would piss off the world onto levels, one everybody fuckin hates us said anne can enjoys actually won a true world championship where everybody was invited and we were the best and then. Secondly, when, like Forty people show up to the parade enough in the united states just to watch everybody having to wait another four years to wait for their team to win it and just see that we want something that we don't even give a fuck about right, like some hot check that The fuck, you know a bentley for fuck, its sixtyth birthday. I like what did you get that color? I guess it's! Ok, you know I would be us if we ever won the fuckin world cup and I wanted to happen. I really do. anyways this a way. I wanted my team to draft michael sap and I wanted

the absolutely dominate because onto level levels. It would annoy fans one that some My team was dominating their team and then to all the homo forbes would be upset Gay guy was just wreaking havoc right, speaking a soccer Dear Billy world class, Actually, no, I get applause you to reach reason more fuckin, sorry, guys to read some more fuckin. Advertisers is, alas, little group here. Let me do a little pause. I write. Whose number two dollars: shades of everybody, the big gray, companies- are what they think was stupid. Lawyer every year they roll up some ridiculous shaving technology gimmick that experts. Does the shell out big bucks for what after seventeen blades at this point

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say about it when you around it and their raises, have never given me any problems. Honestly, I have the best shaven my life with their feet. Ex razor. You gotta, try it, never used that stop putting words of my mouth. I, like the double blades you got this sweetheart. I told my body about the dollar shape club. That would be you guys any shares a subscription with his wife no alive. I think it's their marriage dodge Why are you writing all this crap? You have a product that sells itself quitting they make me some more personal aright, its poorest the way I fuck up the red, ok, My wish list can get started now: adults, shapeless, dot, com, slash, bird and don't forget next week is fuckin greg. shave upgraded weight of great public, what the dollar shake club give car position after, more first ridiculous, shaven gimmicks either so get ripped off for the big getting ripped off by the by

shaven companies joint dollars, shape club dot com, slash poorer, ah shape club doc. What I have ordered three times in a row without punctuation doubtless shape what dot com slash for. Then it is shaped club dot, com, slash per I understand what it is. Dollar shape club A calm slush, that's what it is is you are ok, this its legitimate we don't need any thousand whistles understand just join it. Ok, unless you want to keep getting screwed. Alright, if you like to be at present, which keep doing what you doin. Oh gotta, get there that little thing I just opened up. Those are my french words. I stuck with it for two months and I don't remember any of em anna back here. Alright, alright soccer,

dear billy, world class. I don't hate on soccer, even though I have a problem with it. There's some great things about the game. Some I wish I played it because it automatically it would mean I have great hair and abs. Apparently what pros and cons would you say there are to the game of soccer? I think are ready answered this I I just love out the whole world loves it and we don't love it, and then we have the nerve to sit there, criticising it right, Then sitting back going. Hey, maybe were wrong about this. You know like the whole world's on, like the fuckin metric system, in which we were not. You know, guy now we're going to stick with the other foot in the fuck any ads. So Why is it that? Let me hear what your complaints, so he says my biggest complaint other than the price falls and watch the injuries is the motto I gotta be honest with you: have somebody is running. Full speed

deaths on your your foot. With a clean I mean that's gonna fuck her. I mean that's up data. I've taken a orissa off your laces is the fact that the reps control, when the game ends, they don't end the game until a play is over. Despite what the clock says, No that's that's the penalty minutes for all those guys roland around on the ground, took too If you relate to it. That's like a snow day. If you get a snow day in like elementary school, you still have to go one hundred and eighty days, so they just tack on an extra day. You are going to get out of school on june twentieth. Now it's the twenty first. that's, how it works. They keep track of the time. Mrs. However, in a game yesterday, I watch Possession change twice at a yellow are being issued he puts, in parentheses, someone's stop their toe and the rest still didn't stop the game, you think can be a raft, can mess with the game, the sakharov scott, a few weapons of their own the

I guess, yeah, I guess they care. While I was there when I talk about that, I talk about the four major american sports, united states of america. What I'm talking about but yeah. I guess you if people yellow cards, given, yellow cars, but I feel like the crowd kind. It keeps the ref in check. Where oh, I wouldn't be a rough can set a player and You know I dunno if it was a big enough games. Maybe he'd get a couple of death threats, but you know The soccer world will actually carried the actually kill. You will actually run out into the field and light Fuckin saw your head off. There was then horrific that happened down in south america. like twenty year old rough, Yet he had a knife. She can tell him you what kind of a fuckin horrific referring job he knew he was going into any.

I didn't into it was some guy, I know what happened, but he took out a knife any stab this guy and I believe the guy died and then his brother. The duty died brother and everybody else ran onto the field and they cut the due to head off on the fucking. soccer field. You know flip out when run our test goes into the crowd and throws, Steam punches in, doesn't connect once basketball player there's other worst. They can't draw a fuckin been orders. it's, because they were nine feet tall and the third grade they didn't have to fight. Some of the short guys, the six foot ones. You know they lot of fight, but I swear to god. First of all they no punches, like they're trying to throw somebody out from like the warning track. They do that overhand fuckin lot of a lot of late. They hear what the deal is. That would be fuckin scary right. If you actually learned some martial arts, I know cream abdul.

the bar tried to act like he did. In those bruce lee movies, or maybe we'll chamberlain and anna. Conan the barbarian did he. Nothing I just sort of sit on that fucking yak. I can't remember anyways, I don't. I don't really Can I criticise micro credits? broke up soccer. The whole fuckin world loves it. I understand that there is something wrong with me and you know I went to a game when I was over in england. Went to that arsenal game in there The lahti was the shit, It was the shit we just don't have enough time to get into it. You don't like. I would say, if you, if you're, if you're into sports in the united states you're into football in europe, ask about for them or you're into football. Even the hockey right and maybe you watch a little bit of baseball. That's how that's kind The pendulum is right now, but this very few boy that can actually watch hockey, basketball to say biting the amount

space. There would be taken up on your fuckin dvr right. I used to do it back in the data back in the eighties man. We had bird mikhail robert parish. You know Fucking add Dennis Johnson Cedric Maxwell nl car right and then the ruins. All through the eightys to the ending of stand, jonathan weighing cashman, terrier riley in the care of the elderly raymond balk right door closed AK, willie plan, when did buys all of those, fucking guys. You don't want to miss a game these days to just so. You did Just don't it that's why I sexual bad school side from the fact that I was dumb was you know,

the beginning of the year school year was football season that fact half my weekend through january. By january I was in the throes of hockey. Basketball sees that ended around may, was Jonah. Biologists. Are you don't worry I'll try next year and I went up and then I go to summer school. Summer school, what a fucking great time that was what you did. Get tat the fact that he was still going to school, what you really what you realize that you are now into this? U boiled like it's like when you reduce something by Eating it up any immediate, basically, they boiled off all the fuckin nerds, all the people that applied themselves and what you were left with was this I concentration of power. as clowns in absolute cycles, and it was the I mean it was the best pocket, those I go into a god, damn comedy camp and where

I want to summer school. It was like three towns she met these Last clouds from three different towns and everybody they had their own fuckin style, and you had up your game. I know I've told these stories before There were just that time. The guy poured the coke, out on a guy moment, the alone during the and we all ran, and we sat down in an african teach teacher came in whose work bermuda shorts. I swear to god. I think they were pink. He starts the lesson and all of a sudden the guy was moving along, comes get yet white t shirt and the coke had made states. All over the front of it just comes back then in the fuckin bermuda short teach looks at, unlike what the fuck egos hang on a second. Box, outweigh the back of the class. Me sticks his fuckin here, square and rectangle head all. At the same time, I got fred flintstone. Had dixon sideways through you know those school windows and then looked down. He sees the puddle cope right on. The window is like

yeah. This is yet which one are you. the coke out at me, we're all just last week. laugh, but our ass, often than in other kid of debt. It admits that he doesn't give a fuck is not afraid of the principle in always out of, they basis what the guy- and it was just like a great time- other than losing your son, europe blueskin oh good, a red. It wasn't about their sunday that continuing on. alright. This is somebody talking about last week, daughter or gay son whore question from last week. Billy friend of gay, I'm a game and a list which now most of the issues that come up in everyday life, pertain to the gay community are overblown I can in the early nineties. I was a bit more emotional and defensive about things back then, because the climate was very aggressive towards gaze. The truth is, we only have a real. We,

come a really really long way. It doesn't mean that the prejudice is gone, but it's a place where there one where I think, where the general concern consciousness, the country is in a much healthier place week, a reader ass, who wish you'd have a horror of a daughter or a gay son, Let me start by saying that I love near, and I can see why you do as well, sometimes think she is a bit hard on the listeners in quick to label label them his cave man I gotta tell you this. For you everybody else who thinks she's too harsh in you guys just know that she's not talking to you guys, I should Talking to me, because she knows how I am and she knows what the fuck I say: you gotta, understand she lives with me. So when I shut my god or whatever I come off from a comedy club, she is the shit that I say just like you?

guys, I say all kinds of shit that actually had a real job. I We would I'd have to issue some sort of fuckin apology. You'd want me because I'm a human being and I'm a moron, so What she does is she thinks she knows all the shit that I say so, which ends up once, I think, ends up going. The stage I usually undertaken to the stage because she gets so mad at me, and Don't you know what one of whom was this? Actually a great story, sorry guys, I'm fuckin in this high altitude. I just worked out and keep it I can drive out here. I know it's disgusting owes me drink you, I'm sorry. It is a classic one that bit I did about reactor. About saying it. I'm not condoning what the guy data bob bob bob I bought like you know.

I was basically speculating what happened it off. What but in the car before that shit went down. I came about a fuckin bit when so I'm sitting there. And I say that ship and she just gross, don't even fuck and say it down. He could right when the story came out, don't even she was doing that shit. You know somebody somewhere you. They can't even look at you she's putting it index finger up like. go unlike hanging on. The second issue is the sort of looking up with her eyes, closed, dont, even say, don't even fuckin say, and I just dark laughing, I, of course he telecommuting. Don't say it. You know they're gonna, fuck and say it That Mr Saturday night seemed billy crystal when he does that. What the fuckin hair, when they said, don't say that you got to say so. Oh, so I said whatever the fuck I said, and then she if so mad at me or whatever, that we have a joint debate about a surprise, surprise and then

a week later, completely unprovoked my mother in law was over and that story came up again, She goes. You know that's terrible, but I gotta admit I wonder what she said, and I start laugh and needs just like mob and I felt totally justified and whatever their that being that bit or whatever so get back to work, you're saying she's, not she's, not common listeners, caveman settle down a labour I must she's she's really talking to me. She thinks I'm a moron and then she thinks the part gas than I am applied piper. Furthermore, she does understand that the amount of people that listen to this just to listen, how dumb I am and laugh and films about themselves or maybe get fat shamed anyways back to the idea. The question andrea me said. However, it is our opinion and I've never thought her wrong, for it has been very diplomatic this case she was way off. The mark there was

Thing discriminatory about the question. In fact it was the exact opposite. was meant. I wish she was here for this. It was an inclusive. It was inclusive and represented the types of thoughts. A man having a sun could have raising alarm the way she did sensationalize is some issues that don't even exists. We do not have chronic problems of wondering what sex we'd rather have be a whore. The fact that the question was intended to be humours humor. What she did acknowledge put it in! category of even less offensiveness Have you ever have made many jokes about a million things and implying this is off limits? Victimize is the sexual habits of either sex or her intent. Was righteous, but it is this sponsible alarming of any issue that makes it harder for a gay boy to be thought of equally and also makes it harder for a straight person to become comfortable issues pertaining to sexual Orientation, pierre

You look better with a beard, Shit, you know, right as I was about to say that this was my probably the most dramatic I bet written thing on the pod cast. you get a red that on fuckin meet the press. You gotta get was perfect. You set me up would in the end you took a nice fuck it up or cut like having a bit. I was like being clean shaven, so you know I'm sorry you're just going to have to keep looking at that poster. Me above your bed, sir. Ok, because I'm gone clean shaven here for a while. I'm here that clean shaven, fat. Shame. I read that one. Are we to hear? up to an hour, graffiti, a billy, copper Crotch Julia, just taken fuckin rights and left here. Is there any way to treat your host get away

I urge you over for free? I help you with your commute. Do fuckin trash my pupils over their first off I like to say, I'm a huge fan of the podcast. Oh, I know how this goes. Yeah butter me up, so then I put my guard down and then you fucking trashed, my fucking. I dunno what my giant forehead said always. Hilarious even saw even insightful at times. Look at that even dummies right every once in a while, gets me through the long commute to college everyday he's. Jesus Christ, kids, eighteen years old, even in sight for little cunt? we still have an eighteen year old from providence, rhode, island live drank there, I've been into art, ever since I can remember, I love all forms of it, except those dumps. Sculptures that look like some more on well did a couple of scraps of junk yard metal together in a pathetic attempt at being crook, creative, but the one form of visual expression that has always been my hat and

passion is graffiti. I man. The question got cut off. Wait a second wait. A second wait, a second I got it right here hold on hold on hold on, as graffiti writer. I am very aware that many people despise what we do consider pointless ugly debt. fremantle to society as well as childish, yet I've been utterly curious to know what your opinion slashed position of our art form is the negative or positive. I be exceeded I like to hear you discuss it on the part cast for a bed for a bit its wishes to the lovely near and you you old, can't, go fuck yourself, Dude everybody's trying to steal around this week you now, I feel, like I'm wine and then all of a sudden, you fuckin sugar, ray leonard me here- p s should come perform somewhere in rhode, island, kinetic boss is soon me and my older brother have been dying to see some authentic bill

boy stand up, but we lack the finances to travel relatively far from home I'll, be there. definitely as I build my next hour. I haven't dared to Boston, I think of february last year, so I'm dope and definitely do. I saw one of my. What is my opinion on an? I definitely think it's an art form. I death, like any. Form this sum I like more than others what I my only come, point? Is the canvas You guys use my respected. Ability to some of the some of the like someone who actually makes like a painting or something like that is incredible. Just sitting there tagging and writing your name. Then it comes down to how how visually I guess stimulating it is, but my as to why. What shows a lot of it is if you actually sprite pay something that I was already appreciating, and the fact that now that somebody else owns it and that you just

bright painted all over it. I understand that a lot of that art is this outlaw thing. I mean I don't give a fuck. You know those metal things that they pull down over the doors of the ugly to look at someone graffiti artists spray painted. Am I thought that those look better? However, you know if you come up like where I live, You know, there's this guy, this fuckin army in gang and they d, shit all the fuckin time in its stead it's just black spray pain and they just spray they're fucking thing has really done They re danger in one of the things which is really stupid, and I thought I told you before that I think armenians and russians are the pitfalls of a. of human like I would not you. I would not fuck with either one of them on any goddamn level. However, I will sit there and the safety of this hotel room in the middle of the utah

by mormons. It say that that that's kind of fuckin way to write danger. Just stupid bidding them to do some dangerous, but I yeah. I don't know I would say it. It did I've seen document prison. You know graffiti? this and I definitely Evan appreciation for it. But I am happy that there off the subway trains in new york I always hated that should then he started scratch and up the seats and shit and it just like. Isn't it awful? after these things are gonna, be filthy because some, people are in here. Do you have to fuckin ruin it now by scrapped you're, not the windows and all this type of shit and like I know you know all that bullshit that they say well. You know With some inner city, kids, they have this, you know they feel invisible, and this is their way of the us of what fucking, ruining property at et cetera, there's gotta be a better way to do it, but I have to tell you: I have now lay there some amazing amazing stuff that I

seemed so were up. So I guess I do appreciate it, but sometimes you know if some of the shit like they got a lot of stuff. Nato allies just classic for just terrence, Beautiful old building down and unjust sticking up a fuckin strip, mall there's not a lot of stuff like that left. So when there is something like that, some are deca. Looking stuff in some kid comes up. Spray paints all over it, and you know I don't like that. I think then I think it's ugly, I think you there was already a piece of art and then you fuckin like in a way it's like your cock blocking. You're, not enhancing it or whatever? I would say that but his funny, though. is when you see somebody driving down the street and like something how can this just fucking graffiti all over that always makes me laugh because I always

about the girl, wild family truck stuff when they pulled in they want to ask for directions, which was that, absolutely hilarious. You couldn't do a scene like that now cause it would probably be considered too racist or whatever, but it was fucking hilarious. They pull him in their steel and their hubcaps and all that type of shit spray painted it was basically, it was a def jam bit like his face. Chevy chase was the white guy yeah I warrior destroying it back out on my way? You know that cyprus should so all you know I forgot to bring up is something else I wanted to show you guys before before I get out of here I got a new rearing put in on my truck. I finally join. You know. I went out to texas when I hung out with those guys over gas monkey. Give you telling me cause, I guess the leather grannie transmission in there and I want to keep it. You know a threesome don't call column just think it's cool is held to be shifted on the column and down. So I didn't you know.

I didn't want to fuck with the linkage or something like that where all of a sudden, I don't I don't like. I don't actually to be honest with you. I don't know. If I put a fourth if that means now, I gotta have it on the floor. Just always, he was born the floor. Three on the tree. so why, when the guy over there. If gas, microsoft, judges, stronger rear ended, you know that, because my truck, equally red lines at about it, was about fifty fifty five doesn't redline, but it's making enough noise with the engines workin too hard, because it's basically designed to just kind of Paul shit around on a farm So whatever so I put a new rear end, I'm pretty ran, obviously does its I'd, some other guys. Do it and it's fucking amazing it's fucking amazing and now it's making me now it can crews like sixty five, which is night and day. You know fifty four the sixty five sixty five, you can you give your crews and fifty five year actually gonna cause an accident, the pop up that extra ten miles,

huge and now I don't know I think I can get the bug. I we want to keep. The truck is original, as I can, but to the point that I've We think that I've changed on the truck. I've kept the original like one better aluminum radio put in I care The original want to have that. My garage, we're not christopher Titus, helped me due to the front breaks basically showed me what to do. I kept the other problems in the shoes and all that shit. I have that and now I have back there. I have my opinion and ring gear from the rear end and down. I found this great website. I gotta find it sheikh explains gear ratios and how to do it check it out. It's one of the cruellest, like fuckin. It's one of the cruellest things sites. I ever read, as far as like mechanics go and you really understand, like racing a lot better like the push paul

It's all about wait. You know trying to, the car to go as fast as I can, while still keep keeping it as light as possible fuckin amazing that whole balance I just all this shit that they do to the car you it just makes it too, I feel, like I moved up three levels in my limited understanding of its really really fuck and fascinating stuff, and now forget how to do gear ratios, but I the rings on my I'll die ring gear and on the opinion- and I was able to figure out what kind of rear end that I had and I was trying to get over to the garage when they were putting the new one in because they were going to. Actually, you know show me how to like the way Titus show me, I'm going to show me some shit but of course ended up getting some. after I had to do so, was unable to do it but so that'll, be it I'll show the raw climate thing I'll, show you, the guy, showing you how to do a muscle up and I'll show you what else, but

just talked about the gear ratios are within the last thing to just to keep it fair, so I'll testosterone stuff, I'm going to show you a fucking chick you, two clifton, saw today on at the base its three basic. How just make an egg within some bread. You know like an egg over easy in this woman actually makes it with little heart shaped like a duty for your wife, I'm telling you this is a type of shit. You do that get out and when you actually fuck up they had entered there had made me an egg in the heart shaped the so watch this thing showing you how to do it, it's really basic which is: I can understand, but I have I gotta show the sick. I don't and I dont want, like I dont a bait, you guys into writing a bunch of mean comments are right: something in the video that is soup fuckin annoying that you're nuts posed to make fun of so I won't are right, but I'm just let you know that get out

there's q and then this fuckin annoying and I felt that this video went into annoying but other than that are put that up. There were any ways are right, but keep your comments fuck a nice guys, you guys say, wait too much mean shit. What are you do you guys go away over the top? You know like, my wife being on that I gave you can just say that you're not to go as far as you fuck and go so really yeah. You know I mean it's let me say that consider I trash everything, but are you know his pocket dial a black list, better there, your countries that supply cast for this week, a fuck yourself, I'm telling you right now, united states and pray.

They make the world cup final, I'm praying that they win it and I'm praying that forty people show up. Alright, that's it go fuck yourselves, we'll talk to you next week. The.