hey what's goin on its bill burn is time for the thursday afternoon just before friday monday morning podcast just check in on you just checking see that you thirsty just seen a few going you know you're almost there especially now late this fuckin podcast as i apologize i rarely call today early call today had to do a seed walking around my underwear cheese is just a movie clear this sad comes over freckle balls had a good time then i came in i with bobby kelly i did ricky your vases podcast i did bobby kelly's podcast from fuck it up in the shed i did that i have just knock out podcast right and left

you think you think all freckled face was gonna book a movie and n n and he wasn't let us state in noticeable and upon what have you kid san fuckin instagram by the way i have an account you guys go to follow skies fuckin hilarious on instagram he gets footage of fights and then he does the commentator on it this guy is fuckin hilarious a second here i just send somebody one of them is naked asian dude focus fighting here post is unavailable because it was deleted oh jesus well i guess that account came when wages i they are going to go it's called crime faces provide best street commentary putting a face and a voice to current events in st follow us therefore

whatever it is it is really really really funny there did the lead this one because i swear to god it was it was a it was easy to asian dude and two black tubes and i don't know what the fuck went down this guy tried to say was over some sort of food i can't make it funny the way did but one of the guys for whatever reason was completely naked the black to knock out the other dude first for some reason leaves the naked do know you think he'd want to do the naked guy first bam not came out to sea not to fucking deal with the naked guy but hey and then the naked guy squares off like he's wearing clothes the ever wondered what your junk did while you are in a street fight all the answers are all the questions are its in this video but this guy

what happened some fuckin asshole flagged ada interest if it's the guy who is dick out then yeah but you should watch they got you got it all kinds of like just fuckin hilarious commentary beyond the obvious share this guy really like it's lotta of layers to big fan big fan of that wants to check it out i'd like to do that every once in a while just say shadow to fire you guys have some cool instagram things to follow one person did watch the video you just wrote back those puke homologies look i make twenty nineteen a mombi instagram shout now i'm talking about a mole geese jesus christ i'm ready to go to a fuckin college under cover ride like jonathan crier hide now i'm in my fifty so you know this point of a guy in his thirty's can fuck and pretend to be a high school guy

student right i guess again is fifties can pretend he's a fucking grad student theirs some are bill bird is hiding out anyway we are here in new york city there is a heatwave everybody a cot this ridiculous downpour and i was going down to the fat black pussycat but whatever it was said that politically correct right plus sized african american feline gender neutral feline does the stone like fifty minutes in front of him i walked out of my apartment i was like i think it's gonna really falcon rain i bought raincoat just this occasion like the umbrella umbrella is is bullshit

basically if there was no wind whatsoever i've talked about this if it comes straight down you fine okay if you not walking you're fine but the second you start moving everything from the bottom of your nose down is going to get soaking wet i think the umbrella jesse you can see through the rain that really does not make you fuckin went so i bought this fuckin rank up at the ranco is like it's no good you know being that its waterproof holds in your body heat and it was human is hell so it's like i'm gonna walk around in this thing flexim fighter trying to cut weight before fucking match and if it doesn't rain i'm going to lug this thing around so it's like a fuck it i'm alright right so what do i do i jump on the fucking train i go downtown since my music i'm having a good time right my party the seller the cellar the fuckin subway to go to the seller

i'm all the way over christopher street right and dogs and want to check out that famous cigar store see what they had their an effect go out there and it's like as to the styles it's just a bunch of people gather staring up the stairs so that means one of two things ok you somebody really fat physically fucked up is coming down the stairs there's a fight some fucked up or it's raining so now that i'm back in new york mode i'm hoping it's one of the previous thanks selfishly selfishly new york makes you very selfish you're all about the gay pride parade until you're stuck in it and then you just like fought these people right for these happy people and try to get where i'm going so it was like it was raining angry

so i ran into this fuckin drugstore and the guy sit near like a you want this three dollar umbrella for five dollars that's what the fuck am i gonna do go out there and get soaking wet it really was rain and like we were out in the rain for three seconds it was you might as well just jump in somebody's fuckin pool and i was not going on stage with wet underwear fucking you know that happened you walk around your pants dry off but you're undergarments they just remind you they won't let the pascoe wielding the so take a secret you got the rain no i wasn't right then you fucking underwear pops up in me to you about the fuckin whether you are in i'd like to apologise to all the priest i continued aware my to my pants after that rainfall if i heard any underwear during the last rainstorm i did later

coming out of the closet if that helps anyway she's in order to remind me of what about fucking aiming pay attention they got a fucking billionaire pedophile with his own fuckin island that's a good cheesy be movie i carefully that was actually real this guy doesn't even gets potent fuck in jail bush time and spent twelve hours a day in his own fuckin mansion will you not i ran jails by the way as much as amended punishing people i would stop short of no pussy that's where i would draw the line ok you want incarcerate somebody blah blah blah blah knowledge that shit but you know this clearly plenty of women out there that really are into guys that are in the jail so why not bring him in once there once a day you haven't come in there

come you keep everybody relaxed and then that's then you you're fine normal riots no more rape in fucking see no some accountant whose wife ass for too much fucking alimony snapped many grab something that they got together at the epcot centre that used to that used to represent their love and now represents the divide and he decided to smash that he accidentally killed already fails bad and he wouldn't kill anybody else he's not a killer just a passionate a moment of passion he's not gonna kill anybody else unless it gets married again it she asked for too much money during the divorce sediment right he's that kind of a killer ok he's like the killing he's the murdering equivalent of that guy who is team is down seventeen the aid to

stop the last strike any still sit near keeping score in the fuckin son when everybody else left passion anyways you know that guy goes to jail and always get raped fuckin seven ways to sunday it is you know if you just fuck i went out did he get those fuckin lunatics little bit ass a couple times a week what why does it to be straight across the board punishment people com you making the judge data the fuckin they are the guys who work there when he called the assistance the matters what he called a fuckin people with the guards jesus christ i can't think today the noise making their job easy everybody's getting laid everybody's fuckin fine you know be the easiest warden ever

second there was a riot i just beyond the bowl or like egg issues that are not yet what what what exactly is the problem then the sincerity of ways explanatory what the problem is a free roman board ended in pussy six i've awake i find it is a good i will put down the shop and to push our view thank you then they go back to their cells it's right towards a good guy i know you to punish people but you you'd autonomy you're also get getting everybody all fuckin pent up a meat i know they made a whole fuckin channel out of it when i now united can't turn you can't turn it back as if they are both literally have a whole fuckin network they they one else channels is essentially the prison right channel right behind the bar said quinn they do all that shit what the tattoos mean over here is the latino section over here's the white section is always neo nazis right

over the years the black section nobody's gonna fuck explained stuff see as is why i'm not i would assume that to be honest with yourself as a white suburban guy like myself how big of a fuckin nazi would you become the second to join you got into prison you don't you just have to do it in order to survive meet how progressive argue that you're gonna take it gang raping in your ass you know me would you rather do that or just fuckin just you know just kind go al white power with the same enthusiasm you do when someone does the wave when you go to a baseball game in summer gets the wave go in and you just fuckin sick of it thirty years ago in it by the end of year was somebody's nea bringing nephew there if again why power

why ploughing rapes god bless hitler keep it they got him ass it went whatever that body language looks like i'm sure there's some psychiatrists out there they could say what that looks like a right jesus christ how did we get here what did you get here you don't have a guessing you start talking yourself and then all of a sudden things just open up anyway bitterness bill withers kick man i fucking taken enough that guy not as hits i like his albums like his albums and james gets is is quickly becoming one of my favorite drummers when my top five grams of all time you know it's crazy i saw he was actually still out there plan in allay he did some gig i gotta catch him next time he plays does i think he's like eighty eighty one years old

absolutely fucking incredible incredible drummer i was actually hang with bobby after park podcast moved mess around in his drums he's gone who you listenin to now set might then i pleaded to amounts in the subway that sound and i literally listening to a good look at little my hour and the hair was standing up case gives me chills how good that guy fuckin place so check him out if you get a chance and if you gonna listen a bill withers i've just download and don't get the greatest hits he's not a greatest hits guy he's a isa album guy some bands you don't need you know they have the couple heads each album and in the rest of its a bunch you know filler right i'll kill her no filler man member that shit bill others is all killer no filler right so habitat i have a good time and of sea by me fixing the present system on telling explain you and in a very like protecting myself way how

would become a neo nazi and you know instagram camps and good music emmy will why do you listen to other projects i basically have done everything except by your fuckin lunch at this point such man i gotta make a fuckin phone call you and i'm flower today baby it's common ideas coming i let us try to see how much more we can do here before get out here and there i have two fuckin edit this thing the thing i do in the most anyways all by the way the big gay i'd be a farmer honey it's continuing pride month is over but the big gay nba summer is continuing i don't know where i left you off but since we last talk quite letter is gonna be sharing our home with low braun jaynes but different backgrounds chris paul is going to oklahoma

evidently for what i heard nobody likes them but you know what i say do you chris paul yeah the nba off season is the dumbest shit i've ever fuck it it's not basketball season and all of these fuckin guys judges they're all couple in up with each other every these pair and off in a pile on a fuckin team nobody wants to compete anymore i guess they gotta that's where they got a complete it just fucking disgusts me you and larry bird a magic johnson fuck it did their converse all start commercial back in the day they finally became friends but they didn't join blared enjoying the lakers he still wanted to fuck it beat his ass twice a year in the regular season and then for a seven come june

the nba lost me a long time ago less fuck it ten years ago i said it was fixed everybody set out a tinfoil had on cause i've seen a bunch of crazy shit at that point so in defence of them i was a little not but i was right about the nba and they found that fuckin mobbed up rough and then when i set out what did i say everybody goes i just have one guy who is it is it just that one guy isn't it always just that one guy no matter what the fuck happened it's just that one guy arms for hostages ali north it was that one guy tat you gotta watch is approved a film this fuckin bullets flying all over the place you know kind of front seat even through a couple a jabs j f k and all the senate just this one fuckin guy at the movies then conveniently gets get the fuck out of here did you guys ever watch said oliver stone movie get your facts straight man i want

yeah don't like the ship i wanted to see the oklahoma city thunder play the gold state warriors i wanted to see the rematch i want to see them try to avenge blowing a three two one led i didn't want to see that one of the top fuckin guys just say fuck it i guess i'll just joined the gold state warriors you know jesus fucking christ i blame the los angeles lakers they started this shit fuckin assholes trying to buy a goddamned title now every every fucking you it's just like the new york yankees and then everybody had to become the yankees if you wanted to fuckin compete and our kills me what kills me is the yankees now go and opera acting like they didn't do those those didn't do it

now all of a sudden there all fuckin high and mighty trying to build out of their farm system like everybody forgets there really are shows like the opera winfrey show when she first came out when she had the midgets running around chasing the male men who wanted to fuck this fuckin neighbour neighbours wife or something she did all right i then that one guest killed the other guests on that others show and then she walked away like she was never a part of it just stepped off you know open bugs binding would be fallen in some shit right or read before yet the fuckin ground he would just step off it had fuckin there the other thing would crash this is why i sucked it fucking physics so classes wants to many goddamn cartoons ages defied all of this shit the funny as i still don't quite understand how an explosion kills you like

unless it just blows you up like the how the shock waves how we can move air so fuckin fast then when it hits you it hits you so i guess you go flying through the air so that should be enough but guess because its invisible its ill give a car hit a guiding flew across to pardon lundy died i do understand just don't get how air can be as hard as a fuckin car explode your insides colleague water some jobs off to san francisco brigitte psychology daddy miss the way at the war you get high enough it starts it becomes like cement you know though i doubt i've never been that high i've been a fuckin diving bored so i dont have any frame of reference when it comes to suicide by water this fuckin phone call of course i don't have the goddamn number they gonna call me

you gonna call me where is it fuck me this happens to me every time i having a conference call are they call me of course i wait till five hundred and twenty nine when i have to do it if it fucking five hundred and thirty you guys want to listen and you want to listen in on a a conference call about about our fuckin stay the special or to forget that i wouldn't do that to be fucking weird i own until somebody fuckin tells me what the hell with it who the hell i'm supposed to call and when to you better not be escape if its escape i'm not gonna make it because i'm ever gonna be able to figure it out like that like the lack of confidence i have how is it here is my cat to date the eighteenth

five thirty netflix call that i put anything else in their fact out no contacts no number no nothing should be stupid headphones so anyway so i guess chris paul is now in oklahoma their point guard just rejoined the good of the guy with a beautiful beard james harden james hardened and so and so together again in houston honey it's like when harry met sally all those years there finally getting back together i can't even keep up with it it's so fucking stupid but genius on the nba part because look me i think it's stupid and i'm still fuckin talking about it is now five thirty one if i don't get on the phone soon enough does that mean i lose my special i don't understand what the fuck happened here

but it must get back to the guardian podcast shall i shall i well you know there's a he way about it i hate i get time that still is shaken me up just that feeling of fuckin lawlessness that immediately happened this kinda the power went out you know same as is his fuckin he waved here right so what is everybody do everybody a crank up their conditions and add to the global warming the word the fuckin thing about global warming is the only way that we're going to fix it is if we get comfortable all there it is we forget uncomfortable or i'll pick up that thought in a minute right anyway picking up where i left off day go just like death through the magic of editing i just took

conference call over netflix and guess what guess what they're very excited about my new special and you know what i've been in this business long enough where i can tell the difference between phony excitement phone in intense excitement and our real excitement so they are and so am i i can't wait for this thing to come out so we would just discussing strategies was the best way to get it out there with all the eyeballs way people consume products these days delay people consume assets i was all that type of shit unlike netflix they always in a blow you fuckin moment the algorithms and other stuff that they come up with so listen to that like the last half an hour and i am very optimistic i'm gonna go to the usual places and then some new places to try to expand my comedic board is anyways i was talking about global warming that wasn't i once again i resolved the aggression problem enough

in our prison systems because obviously the fear of getting raped in the ass is not stopping people from fuckin committing crimes so they gonna do that aways nothing to get raped in the essen and they're not going to be happy you know or they gonna rape somebody ass a dead dead dig of frost that line what you make me even worse parson and who's gonna pay for this in the end it's gonna be the gods and considering most surprising to see india and get back out on the fucking streets yeah no wonder why don't you fuckin some fuck and women in all they want to fuck and woke up with these guys there right now letters and shit brigham everyone every once in a while seventies ladys outdated little present day ago soft bring the testosterone down services ladys out here in the general public where where free law abiding dick is just not getting

the job done these ladies they they want to feel little danger i don't feel little danger and controlled environment just fix relate to get made fuck on a leash you fucking dog runs the end of the least back in the day i ran his fuckin legs would swing you let the lunatic just runs at the check and the only is body can't fucking make it right i guess his arms could list he's gonna fuckin monster dick that belonging to the rights of those things any ok you're ties fucking is falconers line is back right he's gonna collared leash as i guy there's a bunch of women down there you run down there you get to the end of the fucking thing you gotta have a fucking or not go with any fuckin runs down the other thing with this falconers tied behind his back it gets to the ed

than any check the likes of just backs indoors deck that's it you just put him in like a dick stockade like instead of your hands in your fuckin head it's your dick and you'll need to stick there is therefore a good thing good serviced then that's it spoken over every he's tested everything spock fine everybody's chill out go or just do a fuckin glory hall worst of all these fuck and unemployed people ok you know most of em common they have hands right she got up to get him some gloves they get in there and they just fuckin crank out you don't you do it like whatever they give fuck annetta like you're out caddy shack polishing fuckin golf ball

jerk off a couple of working people and keep the present say i don't know i don't know i don't have a fucking work all of this item just say there's gotta be away do it right make people let's find thrill will you know when you pitch ideas to yourself because you yourself this just go and yemen this makes sense and then you just go to the next level the next thing you know you just talked yourself into a corner where it's like that i just suggest that they have glory holes in that fucking unemployed people who never committed a crime like they're only option out of that is free to go jerk off a fuckin and made through a hole but what happened here all let's get these fuckin bankers that caused the two thousand eight thing let's go out for these corporations have kept us in this never ending fuckin war where we get plenty of fuckin money for that but the summaries we want help the fire fighters from nine eleven who are suffering have no funding for that now fuck and funding for that gimme a fuckin break

like an asshole lying piece of shit to fuckin land grab and you go after the natural resources you know give a fuck about anybody else but yourself and then we question it we're not american we're fuckin socialists and we should fucking leave the countries that works there we go now back on track so sorry that fucking gloria stuff and substantiated you start talking here you know the way you gotta go anyway that's we a little advertising here quip everybody the truth is most of us are brushing our teeth wrong not long enough and forget to change our brush on time that's because most brands focus on selling flashy gimmicks rather than better brushing but not quit so what makes quips so different ex please mention all the talking point below hey quip if you fuckin type and i'm going to read it for staff

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dropping jawdropping fucking stories i had no idea no i did go to show you think everybody's getting along you think everything's going had no fucking idea if you're not even if you're not into music you should read that fucking box tremendous she can pre order it i tweeted the link it a thread whatever they say definitely check that out add to this weekend i gotta show in new jersey on saturday night does a few tickets left us or freckles station and ass tomorrow weak seven out of ten is over on the movie and next week next week is the big weak get up we get the weather firefighters stuff we fight a fire as firefighters do don't worry laugh unknown the day that we decide to do is gonna be the hardest fuckin day and the so already taken

it's on who's gonna bitch the most who's gonna fuckin pass out and just make a complete fuckin mockery

of what it means to be a fireman so it should be a lot of fun right that's it everybody evergreen great we can you can't and enjoy the music here and then there's another half hour of bonus material year from an episode of thursday afternoon just before friday money one o clock ass from a few years ago from a couple weeks ago i don't know how it works it s all right what's going on it's billboard it's the monday morning podcast from monday july eight

two thousand and eleven ma am jesus cross ized ass da adverse why is that song in my head i still remember the guy who sang it back when i was a lad and i went to charge oh jesus i tell you guys i should i was actually an altar boy i dressed like a little angel and i sat there and i rang the bells and i would add i hold i held some sort of something when people so communion i hold that little old spatula case i don't know what the little way for fell out are represented the flush of another human being which you really look at it is pretty fuckin disgusting this is the monday morning podcast

shaping this sunday night i'm recording this by myself in a hotel room wonderful downtown san jose i just wrapped up my weekend de san jose improv obviously salad heavy work and the one in houston avows there yeah i just hate yourself i just really hated myself in a moment for even attempting to make that joke fuck you of all you are all your jokes good is this the monday morning every fucking joke is funny podcast i never said that you gotta have bad ones side so that you can compared to the good ones you would know what a fuckin good job was if i didn't tell such a bad joke their rights to stand down mister yorke grumpy at me you forgot to crack your windows and now you sit there in your current dashboard is all fuckin hot you're all heated up tonight you given me shit i don't need it buddy i'm fuckin needed

always beautiful downtown san jose and so really lie we town it's a very it's a town that really the big time misdirection with this town's because looks like mayberry but you can get fucked up at ten in the morning in san jose areas i'm just bite me evidence of that that's just a vibe i don't know what it is we ve got all these great stores all these desperate restaurants they have a trolley ok i'm a classic a guy nothing makes a white guy feel safe like a trolley the second we see a trolley i don't know we start picture butterflies and flowers and august he bore maybe you got a trolley that's quaint you know

how am i gonna get fucked up in such a quite atmosphere well i don't know i don't understand san jose they have a fuckin home problem out here the likes it which i haven't seen since the last time i went to san francisco which is they write up the street maybe they took the troll ah really made me laugh i hope you enjoy it cause i sure did ways any wish some other time they suffer right now i'll fuck san francisco and san jose have suffered the dirtiest both filthiest fuck and homeless people i've ever seen in my life i was talking about this on stage tonight i'm eyes will share with you right i understand your homeless you live outside i and

stand that you gotta be dirty but these fuckin people it's like it's like they walked out of the dust bowl i dont that doesn't seem possible to be is dirty is these people it's like dirt its right from the city they have like clay on their faith they look like box car willie like school homeless like slaves walk outside the city they find a bunch of dirt is that my forming that's probably some telling told me to shut the fuck up to love watches hello i'm doing the podcast i thought you under the person in the next room over tell me to shut up a loaded podcast listeners did you guys here that i could even i let me my colleagues have done with this shit ok bye bye

i gotta hit pause and he was was of talking about those dirty filthy s fuckin homeless people like they go outside the city they go into the woods they just role around and dirt in and they come back in the fuckin horrific look at such a great time here this i'm telling you you gotta come down of your anywhere near san jose downtown safe but say now that i've shit all over the improv set this beautiful old theatre i'm the last time i was here though say now old it was our charlie chaplin used to perform their and girl buster keaton in all these guys so so sits haunted right there are always haunted but no one can ever get it on me so anyways i don't know either just amazing crowd showed up all week and i had a great fucking time out a bigger say this place creeps me out you know i was i took a walk this is no drums shop out here

and was a programme shop i believe a went down there and it was a mile away from my my hotel so i decide all right i'm kind of sick of working out jesus look at the fuckin tits on her while jesus christ who the fuck is that this case upton who the fuck is kate up to channel one twelve sorry got the tv online background what a fuckin rack got lesser jesus christ anyway let me try votes on the tv here planet of the aids the frequent is on his gaze come out come out i'll fuckin our known august now excited to see this goddamn movie remember and i hope that a few fourteen months ago saying how insane this looks and i can't wait to see it and guarantee was gonna be a blog buster then i found out was pga thirteen i was

gotta be shit how to fuck are it's taken over the world peachy thirteen gets we explained to me i would say that to me i got i don't want to see it now because we to see i want to it goes why sicknesses peachy thirteen as pg what i go it should be rated are she goes cheese christ what you want to see monkeys fucking what you did i wish you'd send another podcast it would have been a line in the fuckin weak but guys back we all want i'm still gonna go see but that means like rather than have unlike show on what a monkey can do to you that way she got her face ripped off i'm gonna show that now cause is peachy thirteen they fuckin alligator armed because they want to try to get families to go out go see it coming pig apes a little less angry he reaches

like the industry notes they probably showed up at this awesome rated our fuckin script and then that god search just butchered the shit out of it like to say something i'd like to contribute something even though i dont have something to add i just feel this meeting is going to come to a close and if i don't speak at this moment there's no for me to justify my desk are they ruined it you fuck it anyways i'm still gonna go see it can somebody any listener out there please explain to me how if over ran the fuckin world how the hell that would be page thirteen even if they just showed the footage on the news you would have that guy just to warn you this is very graphic it caught it to a bunch of people get no fuckin faces ripped off pg thirteen let me guess is gonna be one nice ape right it's gonna save james franco then they gonna

bobby sing a duet by the end of it that's a page thirteen movie you now have some fucking balls peachy thirteen that's that's pussy raided are right and if i was ever elected ok i was ever lecter that's one of the first things i would do away with aside from hunting bankers i would have like legal deer hunting season i would have a banker i'll kill me to shoot him in the act of the bee begun to something some sort of a push back on our side so anyways what the fuck was i can about here out san jose so i'm out here i'm having a great time is dirty filthy fuckin homeless people so eyes right let me go let me meander back to where the hell up where the hell i was perfect minutes ago some on my way over to where the san jose protests

sharp and i see that it's like a mile away so i'm not into workin out any more i think it's fuckin stupid exercising staying active stretching walk in that type of ship but sit near lifted waits weights of going on elliptical for an hour does it make god damn said to me i beg of you short run it makes you look good but all you do is wearing out your joints you know you could court upon a cheese you dont have to fucking go on that they look at people back in oh god damn skinny they were they didn't have any elliptical they fuck it ran around outside with their dog till i get rabies then they stuck in and out house and eventually they made the oldest kid shoot it for some fuckin reason that's what they did they sit around cookies decisive face so anyway i'm like this shit's only like like a mile away saw walk over there i'll see what they got

then that i'll walk back there'll be a two mile walk and then i'll go get a salad like of fair and that my day i'll be all right so i walk over there i don't have any problems right have a great time fucking from shop is beautiful all kinds of pull over their help me out at a great fucking time but some drum sticks and i left and on the way back i'm on the phone i'm making some calls are making some moves cause i'm a player right column whatever talking to someone good person trying to figure out why i didn't have more media here in san jose that's basically what i'm doing walk down the street all of a sudden i see this fuckin lay a walking towards me right she didn't look like she was on math but she did

look like she wasn't on math she didn't look like a hooker but she didn't look like you know maybe she didn't soccer dick everyone so offered twenty bucks one of those maybe people right so immediately my inner sort of defense system kicked in the first thing when you look at somebody crazy kind look to see if they have a weapon and once you see that they don't you think maybe glance around see if they have a partner right no partner it is clear and that is the last thing you gotta worry about don't get scratched so walk in and she spoke in diagonally coming towards me some on the phone she's going let me share i shouldn't let me though i do correctly with audio she's far away walking towards me scared me share scares me scares me sir just keep walk right by sheer excuse me scares me here and i walked right bar you not just blower off i just keep fuck awoken

try to figure out why didn't have enough radio to sell more tickets here in san jose and then also she yells whom you can at least acknowledge me which of course kicked in i temper and immediately turned around i'll check up on a fuckin foe right which immediately struck me as funny because that used to be that recession used only happen endorse those i can your conversation but now because the technology the fact that i was still walking on a sidewalk under a fuckin overpass i can actually scream i'm on the phone it felt like oddly intimate like i had a relationship with disperse really pissed i was at that point when she got me to flip out she completely ignored so now i wanted to be acknowledged and she totally the table zombie which i gotta tell you is one of the easiest thing to do is turn that

labels on somebody who has a fuckin temper but to me my entire goddamn life and i'm in a very torture is part of my life where you know can a and realise that that's what was happening so i had that ignored is bliss moment now it's a choice tourists time because i am completely aware of what a fuckin full i am if your listening to this lady congratulations to you you won that round i would speak it how about the world cup by women's final but he watched at whose devastating as affair of u s women soccer that i became when i not that they were in the finals et i went down to a sports bar and i had an unbelief mobile time watching that game the fuckin awesome game whose heartbreak and in that type of shit

to see them lose it and a lot of hot he's on the team to a lot of fuckin good looking girl civil thick thighs and their fuckin turned up leg yet i was hoping they were gonna win it but wasn't meant to being congratulations to the women soccer team from japan ass plain ass game you never said die came back and i got t that fuckin corner kick when they scored that second go how do you defend it gets that there was fuckin insane insane goal as you know obviously i mean for the u s ladys but there was good if any i was gonna win it was good for japan all this shit that they ve been through this year so now founded upon the back i to ask the japanese people a question what the fuck with all those teen wolf haircuts all the women had on your team can you explain those fucking haircut five of them

swear to god every time i sought from by that it was michael j fox on fuck unbelievable sandra there's no excuse forty them back the day you know if you live in the middle of nowhere are you lived on the other side of the world and you weren't up one the style was i could see you having a t welfare cut not realizing that the last person to have that erika was i think maybe dennis miller on one of the last episode he gotta get away with rock in the mall it for a long fuckin time that guy but now there's the internet there is really no excuse wasn't all the ladys on the team but there was like five almost like what the fuck this was to do just out of sync congratulate him go fuck yourself it gets shit on this goddamn podcast as did i he gave me shit on twitter so they you ought to see my show so i saw a billboard the improv

was one hour of the exact same joke i somehow miss the funny part that i got it tell you that one really stuck you why because i think she was right i just fuck went off on this goddamn tirade what's wit my act is right now it's dislike i've the end of trade women are just second doing it and my i have one show where i just started on this fuckin try should woman thing and i don't think i pulled up the entire fuck and show i'm sure a lot of guys like that but i can really see actually tonight i think i have one of my most balanced shows up the weekend because of that woman's criticism she was like she was a hundred percent right because i kind of thought back to my actors like what for the first three minutes trash women and then for the next hour and twelve i think i was here these charged everybody

also anyway speaking of sports did anybody watch the espies last week anybody what sells or watch them on wednesday me and poverty my yeah my friend outside of this business end within the business he opens for me on a lotta east coast dates right out too about minnesota they can first i was derosa would have fuckers are furthest west i've gone with him out gives a fuck plough ahead we actually yeah submitted some jokes we were they're gone you know or always joking around about sports royce break in each other's balls i had an inn i knew somebody who knew somebody who knew somebody or new safe than i say fuck it but submit some jobs we actually got a couple on i was site and then i in the of tickets me a near went down i went to the espies everybody like a fuckin big shot it was funny actually got to walk the red carpet and that's all

these giant fuckin and it was awesome it was walk in a red carpet is awesome as you would think it is and the except where no one knows who the fuck you are but when you feel like an asshole fuckin walk in dirt know what's he stand in there just one a fuckin nba championship but i like plan said oh say proper next week vary but who cares i try to make an excuse that the reason i didn't hang out with because it was to study there's nobody knew where the fuck i was of data why was i would assess their their running my fuckin yep but anyway we ended go inside right in always awesome i don't i don't bug people for pictures you know

i just i just don't do that shit but there was a doktor fuckin j doctors i was sitting about five rose down and i was in the middle nose like twenty people to the right twenty people to the left of me and he was sitting right on the out cuz he always got long legs and also they want to cut to him when they're shooting people and he was standing there and in like a bunch of fuckin nerdy white guys like me were walking up and he was shaken their hands are getting their picture of just sitting there going that's doktor j i gotta do it i got a fucking you kid me that guy like this entire oh yes pianist standing on his shoulders this is the regional guy the original winner of the fuckin duncan contest the original guy who took the game above the rim the best in africa

the guy was saved the aba they cause the aviator combined with the and ba the best fuckin nickname though so take seventy six or series early eighties some of the best basketball i ever saw joe his jams jigs member that cover sports illustrated when they got by the celtics that fucking nineteen eighty three to four fall foul i gotta a picture what this guy when i finally said fuck this i'm doin it right here stand up he's dead though the announcement was attacked please everybody shut off yourself cell the word shows yet if you get a just a vivid and then he sets thousand bach fuck to someone i get i'm gonna get a shot i'll get a picture with them at the end of it right and then all of a sudden a show starts set myers comes out an hour sit near all nervous gonna fuck is it because i had a feeling you know that

maybe up we're gonna get a couple on and he i do want to jokes and thank god they both did well and i don't know man i was i was a rush stefano fuckin rushed i was always wondered if i could write for somebody else first of all i could do it and then secondly how i would what i'd be bombed as an eagle maniac comedian that i didn't tell the joke what would it bother me in a day i actually i gotta take a different sort of throw out of it i was so fuckin nervous those like oh my god what a five right absorbed in any says it and it bombs euro he's up there look like a jerk off because of me you don't owe me it's like accidentally shooting somebody in your own platoon and you gotta i can live with that you know so thank god they did well and

and i was able to relax and enjoy the rest of the show and then the end of the show comes oh my god i'm gonna get this picture with doktor j and like twenty fuckin people to get to the day after day step over they all stand up at the same time and are we stopped jason he just gets ushered out and i keep thinking that i can somehow zigzag through people on i just see his fuckin silver afro zone africa cut down you now when he's like six six or whatever i just watch him slowly disappearing into the crowd than it was it was over i didn't get the goddamn picture i didn't seize the day but but being a great night and dumb you know i don't know being diversely were like two little girls all excited that we actually got something on there so why are they go there's a happy story how about that every week i'm always fuck and angry on this goddamn thing dont get off

that was it actually those that will i believe that that might have and the first feel good story that i've ever told in the podcast out of that feel that they make you feel uncomfortable to get back to trash people then how about that there's something for you like i don't know what all the fascination is with redheads our lately i don't know if it's because south park did that chicken ginger day but like i've i've never felt like more of a freak in my if this is all this shit come up you know i did somebody sent me an article says do redheads need extra anastasia evidently it said it goes bad enough that redheads they go or ginger's as our british friends call them since one of them our friends should just say or ginger's because south park made fuckin mainstream you don't give credit where credit still arise

as you know i kind of like that they actually say that that's a british workers i was get weirded out when people say that because like your raw like audition four lock stock and two fuckin barrels would have the hell the name of that movie is cause i've always known that word over there and to hear fuckin people like in vienna use that you now considering they ve never benda europe it always strikes me as funny you know i gotta know now where they dislike top it amounted to you anyways it's bad enough that redheads may one day be extinct you know what awaited started right off the bat evidently we're like dying out jesus imagine being the last one on earth i thought i had a bed holy shit we find out that people with red haired need more anastasia than other people do what the fuck

like i don't already feel like enough of a freak i get it i dont look like other people and one step away albino don't get as much shit is redhead do lately our attitude thousand to study conducted by researchers at the university of low avail kentucky and guarantee you nobody from kentucky was doing that research that's all people from large states they couldn't get it ah but other schools and then go to louisville does not once smart person in kentucky i guarantee i'll fuck relax i'm giving you shit i know this people will what's his face mohammed ali was from there when the quickest my of all time right anyways proved what anesthesiologist doctors who oversee the earth the administration of anastasia like we did know at the fact that we have believed for some time red heads are more differ helped to knock out ok there's

she's at stroking my ego like were stronger than you fuckin pigment bastards had affected they i like that that they prove what doctors who administer anastasia have believed for some time that its hearted put redheads under really you care to tell some stories of some horror i'd freckled face people waken up during the middle of a fuckin appendectomy did i say there right researchers at the university of louisville chose one test subject all women all ladys aged nineteen to forty ten redheads at ten were brunettes at the dark haired objects were in the control group nay just lost me what the fuck does maybe you just said there were ten redheads ten were brunettes the dark here subjects were in the control group i had another sides background what the redheads to wild to kick troll

the research does that mean that's hard to ruthie a red headed woman ass the persian cycle sit there one and how well you ve got a drop in a fuckin drink jesus fuck you let's flower have there we go at twenty women were given who gives a shit i can read have to stuff here lorraine occur when guess anastasia after the anastasia took effect the researchers gave each woman electric shocks jesus christ in a recession or what the fact that people would actually sign up for this would you give a walmart gift card what the average amount of teeth other people nineteen two forty fuckin group of women how many were actually

pregnant and you fuckin look past whether in the first trimester mustards ok after the prestige is exerting electric shocks using a voltage which a con this person would have found intolerable if the subject could feel the pain the researcher increase the dough of this lorraine and continued who administer shocks until they got no response to the shocks to war here did they do it what was joe kennedy around when they did this that they give somebody a fuckin phlebotomy at the end of this year searchers finding showed that the old anesthesiologist adage is adage is true redheads require more anastasia in fact it an average of twenty percent more say i could have told you that pasty face mix with their fuckin red haired drinkin down the pub is all you fuckin calypso

bastards have passed out underneath the fuckin bar we knew that anesthesiologists have a dangerous job and it takes a large degree of skill to properly put some i don't give a fuck about you guys it's all about me so they go i can't i can't tell if i find that a complimentary story or raw or what i don't know just like i already felt weird enough thank you thank you for maybe that if you guys can semi more in for me about redheads that makes me feel like more of an outsider i would really appreciate that by the way i actually have breaking bad on in the background on view i have already seen this episode cause i was lucky enough to get an advance copy here support i have it on mute because i want them to get credit it out they only you'll get credit for fucking now

wars is if they watch live because if you t vote the advertising companies alike will local people tv oh shit by tv show stages fast forward through the commercial so we're not pay for that so while i don't know i why decided to tell you that because it was awake at all said bring up the fact that i'm gonna be on episode three please at this season everybody suppressed fuckin show on tv adele you get see me for a couple of seconds you know when that be nice the post nice face to these happy words that are coming into your fuckin ears at this point that let's ploughing habit the podcast all right oh by the way i have gone as of saturday nine months wouldn't without booze trying to go a year people on three fuckin months away this is my might my power a cleaning up like thing right

i got nine months with no booze i've got myself to the point where i don't fuckin lou my temper and the car anymore you don't you walked out the sidewalk and yellow me you're on your own on that one but now i have gone a little over twenty four hours without watching online porn so that's the next demon i'm trying to get out of my life it's gonna be right i'm just gonna go all the way back gradually go back to the issue of why was when i was a kid and then what's great is because i'm an adult and i'm an eagle mania i'll then find jesus and i'll start preaching guys on this podcast is if i wasn't a complete piece of shit for the less fuck and fifteen years of my life yes so i'm trying to stop watching online porn gonna try to old school

try using old fantasies use the old noto right little lips and for your little brain games anybody out there no good website that has spelling tests i want to become a better speller i'm just sick of being a fuckin moron you know those trying to write jokes this week the amount of shit that for the espies the amount of fuckin people that i can't i can't fucking the words that i just cannot spell it is beyond me i'm go but the little once you know like fought can't you know shit you can't get on tv but like words like apparently which is a great word for a monologue joke zabdanu dab dab dab adieu apparent we yadda yadda yadda right you gotta be able spell apparently from would have any sort of fuckin career jesus fell just drove this podcast right down a finale shared off the side view maris isn't gonna be garbage cans

blocking it let's go to the next thing here oh here summit mason tiger woods some we this in tiger woods wife is back and action tiger what's acts lady is back in action hard bread can ellen nord again fuck you say a gardener mean heartbroken she's heartbroken everybody she got quarter of a billion dollars in the divorce settlement and she has her own island and she has the fuckin nerve to be heartbroken you know what is what these brought you don't amazes me about women who mary unbelievable men like tiger woods sugar shane mostly by men of unbelievable accomplishment and of astounding achievement men who were in the record books what their sense of fucking entitlement that they have

to the spoils of the pressure that your husband's dealt with is just can beyond me i get it what you are married to the lady you cheated daughter she's pissed she wants to ever forget you know she wants to go our separate ways she wants some fuckin money but the fact that she feels she's entitled to that much of the fuckin money and she now had to sink a pot what are they it happened to her if she was standing on the goddamn wherever the fucking donald gulf wherever you t off the tea off spot right it's not the green the fuck do you call i'll meet you at the the thing but the little balls their budgetary offer to your place can you imagine she added to t offer but not only millions of fuckin people you got like

three hundred people on either side of the fair wait a few hooker slice somebody's gonna die she could never their pressure she's were two hundred and fifty billion two million dollars she's a nanny she's a fuckin nanny she got half as much money jerry seinfeld got four creating a writing the greatest above all type did she do sit around a pool fuckin manicure pedicure get your hair fuckin highlighted so many ways evidently she's heartbroken everybody you forget the people in japan that's that it out what would they know of our heartbreak you know sure that tsunami whatever this poor woman do you not think i'll tell you something in order this is most people japan they live in smaller houses so i think the problem with is that alan

she is she has to live in these gigantic houses by ourselves so she feels way more lonely so that's why i think she's so much more heartbroken so anyway heartbroken alan and even though a fucking because she's never achieved anything in her life nor dragon now the grand he's found love again everybody with wooden should know what a the american investor james dignan ellen who divorced cheating gulf great tiger woods you believe that all the chief meant tiger woods all is accomplishments his first it now is cheating about grey golfer of his generation winner of fourteen majors and cheater tiger woods following

divorcing tiger woods following a series of scandals with multiple women has dated as has been dating dignan this guy is the son of a billion air michael dignan she's been dating on months friends say jamie is an accomplished emerging market markets veteran who has represented his father's interest in china for the past six years in them ninety specialised in russian private equity funds he also owned in india car racing team sponsored by world childhood fa foundation a charity file by queen sylvia of sweden the chair coming bachelor has previously dated bridges moynihan the fact that mother tom brady's baby he was like last year the princess mandolin of sweden say enough something

of this this ellen is a genius or if she's a fuckin moraunt because if she thinks this guy isn't gonna cheat her she's out of her bite a ellen you want a faithful guy why don't you start with someone who can afford a private jet who can fly thousands of miles away from your pussy and your eyeballs why don't you start with that you know what is your prerequisite for jumping on a cock they have to be a billionaire your gold digging whore how can we can't find of some guy works in a warehouse don't you know she's gonna do she's working her way up denotes alan's basically doing is she's suck in the right decks i gotta tell her that i gotta tell you that that she just his genius for time was a billionaire she fuck and walks busy banks fuckin shakira hooters rights as she says i to hell with you and i'll try

let's see even though we have to bring up and i'm only title to five million dollars let's work it out and i'll get a quarter of a quarter of a fuckin billion so now she she jumps to another billionaire this waiting she does in fact with millionaires smashes this fuckin poor bastard right it's gonna get up cindy him in other probably last another six years or whatever then she's gonna get the two fifty right she's worth half a billion figure that point should be able to be like thirty five maybe could show slide in another vulcan billionaire you know there be another two that issues worth records of fourteen billion invest their money right she gets twenty percent on that she's a billionaire she did it they go ladys that's how it's done can choose love that's the way you do it

not the greatest thing about all that is she'll be painted the victim the entire time heart broken heart broken how come it doesn't say heartbroken gold digger ellen nor dragon ellen once you go fuck yourself lady all right what else do i got this year the brutal weak for guys sugars they mostly gettin fuckin divorce and his he's got up all this fuckin money out right and his ex wife is getting his championship belts it's one of them cruellest things i've ever heard of my life and she said play it off my wife just keep it for the kids in the kids will get him when they re first well no you're not a right that's passiveaggressive bullshit you're trying to break the guy that's evil vindictive horse shit for you to take that and secondly the kids

didn't put their life on the line in the fuckin ring so they don't deserve them and if they do deserve on its it should be fuckin mostly should make the decision cause he's gonna put his life on line you fuckin what what did you do let me guess you supported him that's that that's your big entitlement good luck this should allow ahead here let's try to have some little more sunshine ito i try i encourage women to write into my podcast i've been begging you guys like the last six months here at so i can balances out cause i don't want to keep trash women is just so fuck uneasy here we go i got this woman road and thank god of woman rodion please write in trash guys i know we're morons i need i need balance here this is as balanced as msnbc or fox news i wanted move it out here here we go right

a lady rodion aright toilet bill i have a question about men in their bathroom habits my husband and i have a great relationship we just oh braided a fifth wedding anniversary and are very happy well congratulations julie you have something most people do not have you have a happy marriage marriage surrogate hiccups she said the only things we ever seem to argue about our manners and housework we come from front backgrounds and were raised differently regarding manners he doesn't believe i believe that manners are important effect while i do we had to adjust to this and it has certainly been a process standards for living had been lower and his have been raised were somewhere in the middle at this point he is really made an effort over the years in terms of cleaning up after himself in not being gross the one area that has always been a problem is the toilet fur

he rarely put the sit down and drove me crazy he's way smart he went to have it in is philosophize is his way out of arguments his main argument for leaving the toilet seat up is that it fair women and men are equals blah blah blah he also like to use the argument that gay men probably leave the seed up all the time i'm an interior designer and have several gay male friends and they all say they put it down because who wants to look at the inside of a toilet the last thing i could say about it was please just do it as a favor to me he said would and i believe that a few weeks ago i was taking a bath and i left the door ajar because he worries i'll drowned or something if i locked the door but look at that he's a grey guys concerned about you in all this a lot of people that they could give a shit so anyway she's in the bath tub with the door ajar

little bit he says he suddenly came in and said down on the toilet in front of me and i was stunned and asked are you pooping and he said no he was just paying so now he's p a piece sitting down and insist that this is normal for men this is where we are right now in the toilet seat argument he thinks he's inconsiderate really he's just super stubborn about the toilet seat he also has no problem of going to bathroom in front of me and i wish there was more of a boundary when it comes to the bathroom a general this dear infected by brain so much it just seems so unmask you want me to see a man paying sitting down that it's it's now to the point that i think it's attractive when men peace standing up so bill what do you think my husband loves you podcast listens every morning

yeah area what do i think these are great husband he loves me takes care of me makes me laugh and he's gorgeous put the toilet issue weird me out our right where to start first of all this how toilet issue this whole tradition that has basically been started i don't know where it's began but how is the man leaves the toilet seat up he's the biggest fuckin asshole face of the earth i dont stand it to stand why we are required to do it i've never a woman give me a good payments as to why they say dumps like so i dont fall in the toilet and it's like that that's my fault you fell in the toilet who right mine drops heads sits on something without looking at what the sitting on the standard you're out of your mind that's on you like what

eyes the toilet have to be totally set up for you but i can go fuck myself how come when you're done with it why can't you with deceit up if anything it's more did easier for you to put the seat down than for me to put it up i'm workin against gravity you know and it be one thing if you said i use one for you if you want to put the seat down because what's really going on you ve magnum enough and it's annoying him then he asked to put the fuckin sit down our rights and now what he's doing is what is he's actually these brilliant he knows that paying sitting down is wearing you out what he's doing this passiveaggressive shit where like our right you want to sit down find out where the ominous start paying sitting down like a woman and make it all in a word for you and then i'm gonna act like that is more efficient i like it the ship is he's planning

the party as i think it's fuckin hilarious my advice to you if you want him to go back to standing up and putting the seat down basically your bathroom situation why don't you give up something why don't you say okay if you do that for me i will do this you know why don't you say like if you go a month straight by you know and always put the sit down after thirty days i will give you the most insane blow job you ve ever add new life ok one do something ok instead of acting like you're you're you're fuckin some sort of royalty and that everything just be set up for you are right i agree with you that's fucking

weird it's weird for me the picture him sitting thou but i think he's doing it in this passiveaggressive way which is fuckin hilarious to me all right they ago that's what i would blow and once a month as long as it keeps the signal that's my solution right got pushing congratulations on your good relationship are moving on may be lavishes just watching the news and saw this lady who cut offers her husband's dick and then throw it into garbage disposal turning it on as she did so wise speed avers shown in women see wisest show why is this behaviour shown in women i mean a guy would have just after wife but women have said you stuff one fire cut up your car with keys if you're in an argument with them if they don't like what you say they turn it a ban she starts slapping and cursing you out many times you guys have to sit there and take this shit take it until

they have had enough and the feet female can't i'm sarcasm really butcher in this all the stars how this guy wrote it on still that's not even a word dude we just right ploughed through this they hadn't until all the guys had enough in the female can't take the shit any that's when shit like cutting off dicks setting is shit on fire scarring up here slashing the wheels in your car come into play did they think this is normal shit to do and yes i know a lot of women would never do these things but they would agree their little pussy pal meetings going a chill she did the right thing persons right dialogue for me yeah well i may there held to a different set of standards both good and bad you know they're here

to a different set of standards as far as sex goes they go out have to shit you did their whores yours stud adele when it comes to stuff like this year they get away with it i don't know why i dont know why they do stuff like that their very i don't know i have no idea i mean i think your hard pressed to find a guy who has had his shit attacked by a war yet our may receive a woman she's on me i would be upset i'd scream at a right or a bunch of names cholera fuckin whore but i would never think too drawing her car or through while our hooker wear out onto the fuckin yard set on fire you know why big can't do that shit because one when a guy goes ape shit like that they call the cops so we get arrested do did you call the cops they show up in your wardrobes on fire they can

of all they could do to not start laughing because they know why she did it cause you fucked around and they are both their dirt bags to so they're all go like i got caught dead you it's like that guy thing we just fuckin laugh there is no solidarity amongst skies which we just we fuckin laugh i think that why does but i'm gonna go out on a limb here most women are going to cut you dick off its role in the garbage disposal you know that but it is a fucking maniac and you you wait i can't wait to see that trial to see what she gets you know she's gonna get off get off somehow just be like i was a crime of passion she crazy oh my god she's just a girl she probably do like six months

let's go to overrated underrated for this week i gotta raptors podcast up because i'm trying to get this thing before midnight and tomorrow's travel day for me overrated underrated for this week these are great by the way overrated nurses i go careful on this i have some friends were nurses here my wife and i just had our first baby and she was in labour for a day and a half day in a half in labour god bless her i notice ass we went through about four ships of nurses that every single one of them at some point manage the kremlin how difficult their job was their underpaid have to work long hours and don't get any respect my wife is excruciating pain and i haven't slept for two days so perhaps you feeling the need to nail yourself to across every time you carry a bloated ass down the hall dole out an aspirin is falling on deaf ears aces

we were right outside the nursing ten when those hog sat a rat those dogs but a great word sat around the whole night cackling it shit jokes and knocking down crispy creams as they padded each other on the back granted i would a blow my brains out if i was stuck on the graveyard shift with that heard all night the wake of this guy a round of applause for the amount of different creative ways he's been able to call these women fat bloated hogs and heard you have a future in writing my friend that blower brains out if i was stuck in the graveyard shift with that heard all night but it didn't it actually seem like the toughest job in the world what really killed me is how they would onto bitch about the doctors and how they wall at how the door

his role air again don't know anything i really feel i tell them i get that both you and the doktor have papers hanging on the wall but the day france's that his are medical degrees from stanford in princeton and yours is an honourable mention from a community college and is our challenge of eighteen eighty nine let's just say i m d gets the tie and move on what makes them overrated here we got let's get to the point is that you can't call them out and their bullshit because although they dont do much they can make your miserable why are there so instead of going off on them i sent my dad out to refilled slop bucket with a couple as in chocolate glazed underrated doctors i know they get respect already but they deserve more no exaggeration we spoke with the doktor for ten minutes she came and looked at our charts did some stuff

a few much machines than laid out three choices and recommended one forty five minutes later we had a healthy baby girl that's fucking hilarious but i gotta defend nurses and they do work there ass is often that type of shit but i think alive it was your emotional but you are making some point not give this it now there cackling about shit jokes eaten doughnuts then jesus i said you deliver your fuckin be it up and precinct it sounds like a bunch of cop jokes to me our idea we go overrated atheists into the other one peeing standing up is overrated it's a real pleasure in the middle of the night to leave the lights off in peace sitting down even during the day and you just want to sit down for a minute sitting down while paying is awesome what

growing on what the fuck men of this generation they need a fucking thank god opera went off the air maybe we can fuckin jesus christ something there is another thing if i was fuckin president i would i would get one knows all beef due two bombers and i would spray cities with like male cologne some sort of germ warfare to make guys a little more fuckin i don't know what happened to us with a great right up until the eighties almost our castle mccormick ridiculous testosterone shows or everybody like a fuckin cool conference there bang in a bunch of women harry chest and what happened in those days everybody's awkward now act like your fourteen on offer fuckin data can relate anybody on tv anymore

anyways underrated jerking off to non pornographic material thou this will help i am find it more enjoyable to jerk off to some one to some off to a thought some girl i sought store or a jerk after some random girl i saw on tv then he loses all confidence like he's a freak and started yelling at me don't you don't you i dare say you ve never done this before i know you go back to your hotel room after a show and jerk off to that big tinted horror in the front row a dude listen if this is what you wanna do stand by it don't try to drag me into your fuckin world i'm actually right there with you fuckin yelling at me off right down to the beach or boardwalk guess what the exact same as it was the last fifty times you were here but more expensive with more assholes isn't that the truth under rate

trips to another city is you're right it is always awesome shit going on in every city up and down the east coast that you haven't done to death catch again but camden yards check out one of the does of free museums in dc you haven't aren't you since the eighth grade each stake where they signed that constitution see a random show at the comedy seller walk the freedom real actually don't watch walk the freedom trail visit sam adams instead that was a good one re going to our into work hung over you be in disguise like this is amazing i don't think i could do this is going to going into work hung over is underrated be amazed at what you can accomplish with half a functioning brain in a bad attitude among those people under normal circumstances would lose his dick if it wasn't velcro on the one i'm hung over and at work i can get

in three hours what usually takes me three days maybe that i subconsciously don't give a fuck and want to go back to bed but i swear i we drink like a sailor the night before i have to do a big project or go to a big meeting that's a new one do if it works for last one overrated trying to ban girls you work with i've tried this too at one time it ended with me putting my hand into a telephone pull out of frustration from being a manipulate from her being a manipulative whore yeah but do you took the bait you took the baby i'll get back to me i finish with this seriously most girls who will come across is easy at the office oftentimes or filthy console end up fucking a traveling soccer team and then all you hear about at work is how they have crabs in their pisses green instead of

girls at work i'll stick to low self esteem girls who go to starbucks and movies alone do thing where you get punch the telephone paul i hope opium learned something from that want because you're you're you're making yourself the victim there these minimum of horrors you given them all the power just know that their manipulate you don't allow it to happen right figure it out don't lose your temper like big and scream i'm on the phone advice and then this will be the end of it a bell i need some advice on picking up this chick i saw a few so go at the german she has huge fake boobs i've never grab huge vague boobs i want to grab it huge vague boobs always wearing really small low cut short of course she is she got she wants to show off what she's gonna

whenever i see i get home and i have to jerk off and not mild jerking off mean double handed shit it looks and giving myself the heimlich but my dick is in the way i see ladys this is why i want you to write it because this is getting really fuckin blue is like the knife conversation about jerking off and i know you're all sit there with your nose wrinkled up in your brow furrowed what do something about it so this is what i need me to come in and fuck rescue the pike s like she did last week but i'm honored there's nothing i can do i get a plough through this so anyway he said today i i'll talk to her at the old drinking fountain this is effected poor here would shouting about how people didn't work really hard at the german i compliment her on how hard she works out they says yeah i know it's cheesy fuck you birds true and i to say something why is that but he comment to make

say was cheesy fuckin lost confidence in it so anyway so what i told her by when i told her it all the compliment tilted her head and said ah well it will thanks jesus so when the worst responses you can get she said it as if i was a five year old giving her a flower she is something that really ought to start to stand up these up like a ridiculous level of funding these last couple here man a really written well looks like she's probably alder maybe myths these while i'm twenty two no jesus ok during our conversation she said that she was so tired from the weaken so guessing she might be a party or very good police work i'm not saying you're right but i like it i like the way you think you're trying to put the pieces together

i dont really party but i'll smoke crack sniff coke and shoot heroin into my eyes his eyes i can play those little baby toes glued to the end of those watermelons she calls boobs it's just resting i'm not sure if she is single are not the proof why did she single she no wedding ring beware at the gems so she may have taken enough proof that she isn't single her titty other the size of kelsey grammars head we grab them tidies for a night built right ok here we go where do we start with this one ok see you go and after i need a little more information is this ok so she's obviously the girl with the big fucking faked its should cease in all those tight outfits you know and she

probably going into the weight lifting room bending over into and all that shit it does she also where a lot of make up when she works out i think if she wore a tunnel make up when she worked out she actually might have taught you for half a second because that would have been another level of low self esteem but arm i don't know do this this is this is a hard won because your lot younger than she is she already gave me the well fags so cecily complementing her is not the way to go i think you're gonna fuck just sort of strike up car another you talk to her just get it what this what i would do get to a whole fuckin time you see you say what's up to her talk you are a little bit but you gotta have that i don't give a fuck attitude i don't know dude i'm ass

i don't know this is what i might need me on this one i mean you notice cause i'm using your jump off point we already said like i really like you you got really hard euro then she goes on see right there when she said ah well thanks outer synergies are i blew it on that one i need to adjust it so what the fuck would i do i'm fucked it i don't know what the fuck what i do that's how i don't i never do well with those kinds of girls that i think this is why the fuck me up of trying to blame you but i never did well with those those girls like that big fake fuckin tits just screaming attention i never did well with them so i gotta tell you do you know it's overrated big faked had stiff the fund a look at but it's not like when you touch him you can feel the fuckin bag in there

at least the last time i did it last time i touch a fair of pair of affair affect its a pair of fake tits was probably jason along maybe like ten years ago actually touch them but they ve come up to me time in dallas in dallas they pressed up against your pino taken pictures after the show that did do they have something alien in their fuckin tits if i tell you they all we look good when their covered up when they take them off they just stand there staring at you it's weird teddy shouldn't have a circle at the top they should fuckin hang down they should be fun you know move with the ocean they should be sitting there looking at you like the judging you i don't know dude i don't know i need more your background i gotta know what your back now what do you got anything going on a life anything you could invite or two

like i have nothing but did they d normal shit make her laugh and steer the conversation towards sex i really i don't i don't know how to approach a fuck a woman like that god dammit you stop the fuck it i had the mouth you actually stop me i have no fucking idea i have no idea take this into consideration as a bunch of big tinted whores out there are i saw you out with that one hour i don't know what to tell you can i say that for another ten minutes i got enough it our five minutes youtube videos for the week you don't what pocket why don't you go right up and ask her start talking bought her tits euro just go up and be rude puts jim membership on the line in just walk right up as a goal just next

she comes walking around the corner with a big tits just react to jesus christ you fucking you try to hurt somebody with those things whatever just get a go at that get a giggling laughing i would just go down that just no respect no respect for this woman respect for any sort of sexual harassment or anything fuck you and your big big tits there right there therein my face and i'm talking about an hour i got an angle it's gonna work but that's what i would do next time next time some like that jesus christ with the big tits you serious scares me what your big tat the fuck gotta go home a jerk off every time can you where's about a hoodie every once in a while they ago they go fuck that jerking off part you're creeper up go that angle address how bigger fuck entities

and then just act like you're over well good can you put us sweatshirt animal difficult fuckin workin outcome maybe go that route like right monologue jokes i'm just throwing shit against the wall trying to find something funny start with that are a factor in a big god tat is what i would do if i was you rob one out before you go to the gym all rights your balls aren't full you know telling you dumb shitting you your head balls balls are empty you think and fuckin clearly right you know what it is her tits i like the bully at school there bullying you right now and you get in your fuckin head and i'm in my head and i we know what this bitch looks like so i think it's time you stood up to the bali collar out colorado big fake fuckin tits and are little outfit she knows what she's doing then i come up and i compliment knew you give me your thanks you should have fuckin

did you see that fucking punch ortiz through when he missed the feels picture where it wasn't a hawk and it wasn't an opera cut it sort of look like a cat to call side are should a slap your fuckin tits come fuckin thirty five degree angle i'm sorry brother i got nothing i really anybody has if anybody has an angle if you can help this guy out man mad cow right we need it this guy out this what this part guess about making you laugh on monday help india your personal lives this kid wants to touch fake tidies i got nothing help em up youtube videos of the week go to the immense podcast to go the amount podcast dot com we got all these lined up these are the funniest goddamn but we ve had in a while these a fantastic see not to go to youtube and search qualities you just gotta

sit there and what you can just get i'll blow right through manufactured cubicle act like your work into a market research would have the funds both be doin aren't youtube to video the weaker frankie and johnny says furniture store this is one of the greatest commercials i've ever seen in my life you know like when i couple store they can afford professionals so they did have the employees do the commercial this is what they did and these people are fucking brilliant jet fail i know a lot of people saw these are sought already i actually watched it on the jimmy fallon show its awesome why caddy you gotta see this this is actually a fifty nine for you guys gear heads out there to fifty nine cadillac to door with giant tail fins that somebody trick out down in australia the really interesting thing about this car his cause it's australia its i've never seen it it's a fifty nine cadillac with the steering on

staring we on the right hand side it's fuckin it's insane and the council in the middle is a replica of the tail fins on the back of a car this guy is i don't know it's gotta be it's definitely to one thousand dollar car the amount of money to skype put it in a car it's fucking insane there is another great one restaurant owner bands kids so local news story this guy he just ban kids under six six years of age does it make too much fucking noise and the guy is on unapologetic all these mobs complaining does now united i understand that it's your kid and it's the centre of your universe but it's not the centre of our universe basically said go fuck yourself there was great to see somebody stand up against a backlash fuck you they make too much voice why bring him to this restaurant fuckin sit

with applesauce in their hair they don't cavan prescience what the fuck was cooking here these people are like we always go here i don't know where else to take my kid takeover chuckie cheese gonna mcdonald's once you make him a foot peter upon joey sandwich if you concern about his health it is a great want socks fan grabs a boob during red sox game i got this one from my opie on opiate anthony he's just fucking great they cut do a couple of fans did you know that guy look at those two nice couples and the guy just reach over grabs girls teddy jerry remy fuckin lose as it is fuck unawares and george michael saxophone guy phenomenal just this guy lay the saxophone you just go look at him i can't described by the funny and is another one i want to add by

we kelly scared opie from the we now anthony show is just fuckin awesome the noise opie makes is hilarious we're gonna have that video up that is another video were open it showed a rosa jody the teen i'll sensation for the open anthony grab try to scare bobby kelly made they completely watch the job and false those clips and if your online listen to the open anthony show get an example where i don't have any in the fucking information but the best radio show for my money out there before i leave and rapid podcast want to thank everybody who has been making the generous donations a donation button on the important dot com a house we paid my web guy it helps me to reinvest yourself all that time it also gives me some walking around money when i'm in san jose

thank you to everybody who collecting i'm really blown away by all the donations that i've got that is it that's a package for this week everybody s great weak please watch breaking bad again next week zone ten o clock on a m c d can i know you guys are busy but if you can watch live it just helps their ratings not that they need help but why not one out have some more people like i said i believe i'm an episode three parts the episode so i don't know i think it's episode three and beyond excite to be a part of that once again thanks admires and everybody at the s peaceful let me poverty scimitar jokes and actually do in our jokes is a big thrill for both of us that support cast for this week i'll fuck yourselves i'll talk to you next week and how about those pittsburgh pirates i'll buy was forgot about the first place pittsburgh pirates snake team seventy nine all over again now if the fuckin orioles could judge

catch the red sox the yankees that's my dream world series my dream serious i want to see the pittsburgh pirates and the orioles have a rematch and i want the pirates go back to those yellow on yellow with the yellow fuckin hats can't to the throw out the first pillar maybe john candle area of the fuck you is there a candy man back when baseball was great

that supply gas or something