hey what's goin on his bill burn in time for the thursday afternoon just before friday monday morning podcast in just checking it on you just check in on you do do how's your fuckin cubicle old do that day go on happy thursday everybody here there i'll tell you this weekend just cannot come soon enough fuckin get up mary the paying you to do you do a fucking job gordon do what it can do this weekend is going to make it less of a fuckin goddamn diaper to be around next week this week kid come soon enough oh yeah who you hang out with that you gotta dump all your fuckin problems on sorry you no it but i'm in a great mood fucking great mood

tomorrow morning i'm taken in early flight of flying out to a casino in maryland dork one or two shows out there i'm not sure i dont know what just point me at this stage and i will go out there and do my fuck a dance but red sox finally one last night what did i do that i call it did i not call it all guys i don't know why you guys continue to watch espn when the monday morning podcast in a thursday afternoon just before friday monday morning podcast exists ok why do you put that's ok you're ok they're professionals ok they went to broadcasting school ok they pay attention to sports way more than i do having said that according to my ego nobody reads the sports tea leaves better than me

of course it is true but the one thing i am right about is all these people that flip out during the regular season gaudy records and all that shit all fuckin wins the red sox have we seen this before we saw the seattle mariners stewart they want a hundred twenty some games came home with no fuckin they came home with their pockets turned inside out and i'll tell you right now there was that there were a lot of lumberjacks in seattle crying on monday our right now oh did i have a well earned reputation is being a bit the convention a bit of a in wet blanket a bit of a right guilty on all counts but one thing i'm right of up

other than my massage monistic opinions about women ike i am right the regular season ok i'm here to tell all of you to come can stand down this screaming yellin fuckin sport kate relax want to do is you take all the staff of all the fucking ninety percent of the teams are whatever support you watch and sometimes only forty percent of fortune hockey the amount of fuckin teams that are not going to win the playoffs you take all those fuckin stats right as the rock used to say tarred about said kennedy is there no made shit could you not going to see those people conflict in october so what did i say when i jumped on the red sox bandwagon six hours ago i say we got the indians twice we got the

who stood ass rose and we got the yankees two more fuckin types ok now we lay waste to those teams i can get exe but even then the play of stiff joe buxton there's more cameras everybody's watch people the little tight you never know what the fuck happened so when you have been telling you guys and yes i am pat myself on the back i told you everybody sleeping on the indians and terry frank corner and what happens what is terry do he comes right out in the first two fuckin games he makes us look like a five hundred ballclub handle us with ease that's too wins to mourn you just took a series of rights we got chris sale and we got price ok that's all i'm gonna get us to the eye i think tat frank or is the best manager fuck it baseball and they never evidently they they get this guy brad hand or some shit closer was for not nor from those last names head right

very impressive lights out i know we one last night in everything but i'm just saying it open that's what they do over there the espn the fox sports are in the business of saying the sky is falling or sending something to the fuckin mood descended to the bone and when the sky falls they have the balls to say what happens what app rather than being like while we were we will fuckin wrong again all they do is hype shit up over there they did maybe i mean how many fucking times have this how do you compare big eighty two thousand eighty red sox to the ninety six bulls it is always an eighty six pulse by the way everybody ignores the nineteen eighty three philadelphia seventy six ok when it most underrated teams of all fuck it anyways

very relieved that we gonna win last night i'm going to try to watch the game tonight and i'll be split with them but i i mean i love our manager in all players in a large ship but i every time i see tariff rate quota regime she's the best europe would habits you just every just like familiarity breeds contempt what is how do you say that word familiarity familiar familiarity hang on a second that's why those once you start the word and then you get halfway through you like oh my god i'm not gonna make it but you're talking to three people to save time the party to see all of them ever so slightly you see their faces drop and they realize how dumb the person they are talking to us four mill year ere it tee at aims spell it right how do you say this affair everybody here we go ready whips hang on hang on hang on

familiarity familiarity familiarity familiarity geraghty familiarity do you know what it is it is fill familiarity of the ball park he ate fucking scare will you get stick and of he knows all the nooks and crannies i said it why yes yep familiarity you don't let your play me listen fuck it robot white guy in my computer we already see go fuck yourself get me a bud like kid watch my way slide for the end of the summer speak it often in the red sox they had some fucking little was the english would sable cheeky fuckin tweet there i don't like it here we apologise to f r fans

for an hour lengthy losing streak why would you do that you know this is what you gotta ask yourself what would build bela check do just law but over the net fucking guys you say that cut his sleeves up a sweater and pork and blind a child to get an ice cream colored quicker year jealous but anyways yet why would you give bulletin board material why would you motivate any other far can t you know that's just i think that's a stupid move and that's what happens when you go in twitter and they probably read all these red sox fans freaking the fuck out you know fifty thousand tweets i bet thirty thousand were sent by dared shaughnessy i always gotta make for him

this is the nineteen seventy eight season all over here are they gonna g20 thirteen at us any worse tonight tonight big big big fuckin match who's on the hill fora the indians i have no idea but the indians of my team if the red sox don't make it issue i like see them get one even though i mean after watch people in the stands have those stupid cleveland shirts that say defend the land getting i think that might be the worst one ok yankee sing why i'm see aid during the seventeen stretch it think that's bad right that is all these fuckin farriery book in brooklyn cards right you take debts bad

you go up to boston and this is what is a sweet air lock the thing is you gotta have like a song for dumb people you know like if you just hum the melody of why i m c a it's a buddhist monk would probably take that some sort of something worth leaders have a complete inability to have any sort of thought in your head you know think about your future why you got back that's it it's over and then the temple of young men walking the fuckin street car you can't dance right here white guys walking around in a square enough is your girlfriend looks over the shoulder at the black eye in the background

anyways and you just think it can get any bad worse than you know pretty bad because it's it's douche behaviour combined with music i mean that's usually takes the cake but defend the land the land what land cleveland you be the one you guys all fuckin abandoned to fucking ghost town driving from your fucking plush neighbourhood all those fuckin rich cuts out their greater cleveland you know in their gaiety communities sitting out there they brought in their fuckin fourteen big green eggs did i've been they come doubt tat like the fuckin paul revere gotta defend the land and go game for three hours and then quickly retreat my cul de sac the lexus fuckin writing more the amount of money and greater cleveland is just say by the way i have no idea what great cleverness like

but anyway is it is it that much forgot to be greater than cleveland see what i did their sorry anyways having said that i love the idea my dad was a big indians fanned grown up indians tigers whereas two teams is he moved around a lot there so new ways are speaking that late last night some argue went down this this fuckin what he called the rabbit hole on youtube and i ended up watching this youtube video about every quarter back the detroit lines has ever had you know they ve got a lot of fucking or not an offensive limit but they have had a lot of fuckin quarterbacks

fascinating fascinating franchise allegedly it's the curse of bobby laying it isn't it is it's not ok you you know to say that your cursed is just you just passing the buck like no we don't know what the fuck we're doing and we need help so that so bobby wayne he left a little disgruntled do you get rid of me you're never gonna win again and then some old lady i already shed for fifty years and that's how it starts the danes shaughnessy write a book about it and make bunch of money off the misery it that's what it should be as next book first a body bobby lane becoming the game fuckin half in the bag he did the dog after fuck it the second quarter

and half time not least in the coach slap is fuckin wife around than he go out indeed ever fourth quarter come back you know this is where they told the story but i remember gregg landry eric hippo i'm joe inherited his whole fuckin courageous runnin for his life that's what's amazing you know when you see like some these people that are called boss like did this ship this should be like a consideration for the fuckin team you went to you don't owe me like a gmo johnson did not come into the fuckin dallas cowboys organization and make that herschel walker trade how long would have treatment lasted in the leak the amount of hits the tec i took the first couple of seasons and i was on his back you can take those hits for so long now not say joey eric did is vulcan troika went up just say it when the way

back in the day when john outweigh the ball the more coats drafted in any you know what it was gonna go to that fucking fridges and they got what are you talking about exuberant play baseball of fucking play baseball for the yankees you know could you guys don't know what the fuck you doing and i have one shot at this and then they traded unto the broncos carbon right did the same thing drafted by the shall hornets fucking playing out there i actually think it is like on four points skip all it's bullshit for baseball it would be bullshit like context sports for the most part to like enough football foot all i get is like dude i'm literally gonna be drink it out a fuckin straw by the time of thirty if i play for you guys are right you don't have an offensive coordinator you have no office of line and i'm just gonna get lay and we'll be like you know

i could give waves his head for a fair catch it just gets that now you know so that with the new rules of what tackling now made i think that you can go to these franchises you not to poland elway get because obviously you can't lead when you fucking we can't leave with your head would go to tackle i'm do a picture holler for how do you do that can you see you can hit with your shoulder all right but there's no waiting here with your shoulder without leading with your head unless you just sort of like it some jump and by like a pogo stick and just sort of like so i slammed it's maybe they should do that i think what they should do as they should have a giant velcro belt around all of them right in the ball becomes velcro and you just stick it on the person the person you can't run they bounce down the fuckin field like a pogo stick and that embryos hops after it tries to bump

but you're not allowed to slap the ball away the way a rod did when he ran down the first base i'm just trying to fix the gate the factors i know it's all about concussion protocol and although i think they should just have nfl players just sign a release be like sickly you go to for thirty years off your life ok but in the three and a half years you play this league ok you're gonna have a you're gonna get more pussy right more goddamned cars more fuckin blink then you could ever dream of items joy well ass ok just sign here and you can lead with your head maybe that's what they have to do maybe nfl implodes and then the w nba takes over i mean who knows story for european is that what's gonna happen

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built out all the wax assumption now martini that i'm just trying to get on twenty eight may perhaps i gotta what tat right enough mice it reminds me of the old fuckin wine a minute oh bottle and james belly right here its ab six its ab five and six those the tough once you know even seven and eight are dead bed like the fact just goes right to five and six it just fuckin sits there to me like you no one ever at european airports and liquid into a measuring cup no matter how much you try and dump it out there's always that little bit that fuckin gathered in the bottom then you try package nap and daddy dick is always gonna be a little bit left him that's what ab five and six like my fuckin world doing all right i look really good with a showdown right now you know if i take my shirt off it's still put it back on

so i think i need to do a little more cardio somethin like that you don't know by a rogue it is it's been talking up this fucking cardio machine i gotta check it out i gotta go next time i do is podcast right in the area on the other night i was i was tat was going on and on about how how unbelievable to sing and how was tiring came out so i figured if it ties joe out its borderline gonna kill me but remember way back in the day there was a and they had this thing called jacobs ladder which was particularly picture you are a fireman there was a ladder that reached up to the top of a fuckin skyscraper right and that's what it was like it was like you on all fours like a forty five degree angle and just climbing this fucking never ending it keeps going to go in and go on you know it's like a treadmill forty five degree angle they they didn't they did it's like you fucking

call ten miles away from the gym and then you like fuck knife how do i get back to my car you know it just goes in a circle using your own weight or some shit like that and i'm gonna fuckin thing and with it three minutes it felt like my heart was in throat done in april so i'm considering getting one of those made by one of those or raw got the geraldo musket chosen we chose always like he's always sees one those guys he's always looking around the corner so he's always he what the next shit is and i feel like he's had that thing long enough that if that he's already passed a wait a minute this thinks sucks here still raven about it so whatever the fuck you got a minute i'm sure i get you know and then maybe i'll have a spinning he'll kick at the death

of that he does anyways my dogs back in town we'll go take her for what i fuck him is said to have so much man i'm having a lie it's just the best but i still get to see like once every six weeks that she's out for six days every durban taken around like a fuckin hike she goes when she sees me i go crazy when i see her though is a little sad when i give you know what and i think she's gonna u stood at this point and i think parliament being taken harder than than that dogs to put any was out let's let's look a little bit of world news that see what's gonna checking on the world everybody trump under fire for claim of large scale killing of white farmers in south africa

is there any doubt that this guy is just a straight up fuckin racist at this point it's amazing how long he kind of hid that like he had no idea what you just sort of this funny famous for being famous guy but the things that he chooses to focus on not saying that this is in happen what farmers getting killed in south africa but you know why people are killing a lot of other people from different races for quite a while actually right now oh i'm sorry we thought you were terrorists will you just a family go into the market sorry about that we ve been doing that for fifteen fucking years i mean you know i'm not say what's going on and have i ve read about it is right but it just like that like i do not we will you can see like you know what it's like neo nazis and you can kind of see their argument to why you know it's kind of sixty one half dozen of the other

fact that fuckin pa petitions both sides are such pieces of fuckin shit that they will they will sit there and they will just they were told the fuck company line because they're grossly under fuckin paid and it's all about getting reelected to sunday you can write three books while you're still in office and then by ten million dollar house that's basically what it is uk outlines plan to avert chaos of a no deal breaks it when they what is this thing gonna go down i thought they were leaving this is like the longest break up ever no deal breaks it so they they leave the european union and then they don't know what the fuck they gonna do all right so they showing a picture of a bunch attracted trailers i make a difference in today's world support independent journalism strive for a dollar a week

can i read what you wrote first how do i know you're independent this is new york times dot com independent mainstream london the bridge government issued its first contingency plans on thursday for leaving the european union without an agreement seeks to prepare the public for possible disruption without spreading alarmed that could undermine support for the entire undertaking the government an agreement for what citizens of other countries that are living in london with some sort of work visa going to trade with the rest of it this is looking like a shit you government emphasised that it hoped and expected to hammer out a deal with the european union but in a series of technical documents it warned that without an agreement importers exporters could face significant new bureaucratic hurdles that credit

albert card payments in continental europe could cause more and that british citizens living in the blue could lose access to banking pension serves call this right now england our great britain leaving the european union is either going to be the greatest or the worst fuckin move ever it's a great move on some level i guess you get out of the world bank's and you get to go back they went away and i can email thrown the euro stolen the pound working on the euro did they go back to the part i can't fucker remember but that's beat that this is either gonna fuckin make other countries want to do it or they're gonna be like thank god i didn't do that there's not going to be where you nanny pros and cons it's gonna be great or a shit you're one of them i just he s be another you china impose fresh round of tariffs as escalating trade war shows no sign of ending

like it what what what do we do we can we just like a girl on people's kyoto hello how are you is this how you want to run your country will god bless you this is how we want our country you know you want some apples i mean how far can hardly said i know i just over simplified it anyways last but not least i did an episode of colored o brien last night the hype my show at madison square garden november seventh i'll be there were joe bottleneck in the right of tread new jersey poverty on november seventh very excited about that and as always i had the best time on ancona him any idea the best current set you up and then if we get in trouble andy saves you actually do for thirty when i left i said you know i think you'll want to save me one time maybe

why are the heap jumped in twice so my idea of a perfect game on conan is andy never has to save me he's always good two to five times every segment boy i had a great time i actually got there a little bit early damn i got check out the drunk it which was was fucking bad sixty w kit so i sat down and she played for a couple of minutes and i know what that is that always like more relaxed before i go out now they do is show i don't know why they because fuckin lunatic i have no idea why she got to sit down at james worth's kit sounded amazing i was like you sure he's not gonna get testify citizen that adds faggot

but anyway i had a great time honoured if you'd like to see some clips middle our post some links or something like that you had a great time as always thank you to everybody overcoat failed me promote madison square garden november seventh please get your tickets so i'm not standing there in a big empty arena right that's the podcast here for raw thursday have a great weekend your comments enjoy this music

interlude here musical interlude before we play some classic kits roma thursday podcast from earlier in the year of fuckin ten years ago i have no idea works every monday so many ways let's get back to vegas out here i had a great time last night i did a surprise not so surprised guess spot on the fuckin

but the fact of the year the all the island tore sorry guys i've u can you tell it been drinkin again dragon again oh baby draken again i would seventy three fuckin days with that without the booze and i ve rosy martinek in law had all came in saturday night after my second show over here the mirage and i came back to my room and i was wait for them they were on their way up kevin shea open for me right who all all the fuckin maniacs were out here and i'm sitting with the lovely near and she's gone i'm tired and i'm tired too i swear to god of these guys were in town i would just go to bed and they showed up we had a couple of drinks

cigar sitting on the table and i go to my wife hey you know like was this we're just gonna go outside smoked a cigar i'll be back in a couple hours or whatever and that was like it i don't know what that was there was probably just a little bit after midnight you know i started drinking and i just became that guy that guy who just wants to keep going it's not want to go home and the party was joke and said what we did was basically they could a shot a commercial for las vegas is what we did i hate to say we did and we just it old school vegas shit that was not old school first started coming to vegas but i've been out here for fifteen years and like the new schools what about dj shit so i don't know what fuck we did we somehow that we ended up over the venetian and

we're already smoking cigars i don't know you remember how just pounding where were we i played roulette somewhere and i made money and i cast out there we want order the nation playing crabs from the dice just kept gotta is a young and everybody saint throw a not bizarre we write it started throughout they were always did i bet the sixty eight the passport i should about the point at the point twice i threw like fucking twelve fifteen numbers in a row you know was bullshit man i'd like five bucks and each fucking thing or whatever i made and i made a couple bucks because i was too drunk to realise like well you know what you feel in it why throw it out a little bit more but i didn't people on the other end of the table or go

your bill bar you throw a diagonal that's right there button down abdullah numbers started shit out of hell of a type tepid people do you're supposed to do laughed and my ass off i made money i went over cached up like fuckin three one hundred dollar bills in my pocket after start enough with hundred so i guess up to one two bucks suddenly shady do comes up to us who had this weird little sorted zipper scar and his nose he said it s a fuckin flyer away somewhere in there i met these two agent chicks and i talked him back into their dreams can incident swung out she was an accountant you want to be a fashion we'll go do that re think i care my gear you totally can't just

if your day job just start working on the fashion thing and then eventually fashion they was pass your other thing like yours so also they get in my head is this is why that can guy was able by where the houston rockets used to play and go in there and talk about jesus what the fuck is that guy's name guy you know what is this fuckin name he's got this wendy eyes close his eyes and he sits there euro g i want you to have a popsicle he bought you i gotta do just people what that what they want to hear and i was totally sincere when i told this woman to go follower dreams but i didn't really give her any sort of concrete plan all i did was just tell her that she could do it and i made feel good so i did do a good thing but you know something if the bottom falls out of state

comedy that's what i'm going to turn into a motivational speaker i would slowly crush it because already to make people laugh rather than being a negative can't i would totally turn it i would we take off like you don't spiderman where's that black suit and he can't control it starts act like can't you start talking shit to women sprain webbed webbed use in their face then he goes back to the classic red and blue and he's like i'm sorry about that sweet let me get that how should i didn't finish that fuckin story so this guy the goddamned zipper stark scar on his fucking knows eight convinces us to go to a teddy bar which really wasn't difficult the next thing you know we're in this fuckin teddy bar these women were really goddamn aggressive like this second you sat down one of em sat near lap

we cycles it really that be honest with you it's fuckin suffocating she's gonna taking your fucking gloomy at my bearings here before you quit trying to shake you tat the fake they're not moving arise do not shake your elbow so anyways wherein this fuckin place and now i don't know we were all guys we don't give a fuck next you know it's like six o clock in a guide their morning six something we can walk out it was broad daylight and i'm sick may alike i think i can relate to was when i was born up in alaska when i went that one of those times a year where had like twenty two hours of sunlight and you are

inside the club and you d in its about two in the morning i got guys i'm tired i'm going to bed and then you would walk outside you'd opened a door in the breeze daylight in immediately give bodies clock you would wake up said too in the afternoon to to night see my twenty afternoon is the only way it does rather than i walked out an hour later was kevin chaise maniacal pocket laugh at like how late it it was out so that was my best that was my first night out here and i gotta be i with to you i'm sorry recovering from it that was too the days ago last after a show i was just like i sat down and i got something to eat i had one budweiser and then i went to bed and i was site to come back and go to bed so that goes back to what i was talking about so i have to rest maturity alex

every guy walk around it takes up i didn't i didn't have any fucking pigment you know but i gotta tell you you got the poor some people i don't know if they just have they just they can't see it all just don't give a fuck some of this shit that people were down but i got the import amy it's like can you put them all of that shit away can you put it away half the people the ports should be wearing like one of those bathing suits from the roaring twenties europe where basically it was kind of mechanic soup like that funds are used aware that one zip up except you would cut the sleeves off any would cut legs off what guys would where women were the same thing and they have little frilly thing going around the outside now it's a real man jesus of my generation woof it's ugly the tramp stamps bob why a tattoo

around europe just that it's not a good it's not a good day what's goin on its bill power and it is the monday morning podcast for monday august twenty three two thousand and ten how the hell are you what's going on i just go back from portland oregon maxie openness on sunday night cause i got a bunch of bullshit have to do tomorrow the fuck i just got back from portland and i hate do these things sunday night because i'm still like jet lag a model so why this is be a rough one and apply through this even if it fuck it sucks i'm nuts

open it and re recording it like i did last week cosette ended up get me in trouble that's always talking about that doctor laura shit last week and i got to say for the four time maybe the second time ever i'm nominating myself is douche bag of the weak as last week actually supported doktor law because i know what can i do she was at dawn get out i was having a rough time doing podcast i needed some fodder so may send me an email what you think about this and i watched like a ten second clip of evidently a five minute clip on i just thought she was retaining some something she saw deaf jam sounds like what she's quoting it she's not con anybody that word but that the ban on that bullshit j zol changes the fucking emails came in from my evidently for my fourteen podcast listeners evidently like six of them are african american yeah they read me the riot act in different stages dog

met they were fuckin right cause i didn't you know something my formed logic is usually funny that i don't know what the fuck i'm talking about and i go off on shit and i realise that our race probably isn't one that you should probably do i didn't know that she was like rush limbo with account i had no idea i just you know fuck she was but she was some soccer monmouth podcast euro at you like all the crazy kicks out their fuckin blob replied no ideas i fucking eggs on my face but you're funny one guy gets so into fuckin trash me wait before closes email is something got from a former marine talkin about that clapping for raw the troops going through the airport he goes the former marie nothing was a bigger joke than seeing those supported support that troops stickers about an empty gesture

lapping is even lamer i voice fuckin thought those bopper stickers was stupid soup the job she just so you go by that for a buck slap on the back your truck our car than you just drive away why did my part do you support the true jobs have you looked at my bumper sticker well all right then there that's fine lamp mason clapping his even lamer he said you are on the right track sending over drinks to veterans who got back but think bigger how bought a program called head for heroes right everts every service member returning from whatever fucked up third world shithole wherein guy did at the time gets me at the airport by some gorgeous whore and blown they specially designated area that would be a great way of showing the country's gratitude what i think if we can build a bankers outcome a trillion dollars i think you can get a couple of fuckin who was enough

but the girls who have a fucking uniform fetish but anyways yes like i got fuckin trashed he'd off a male gibson i bet betty couple a less fucking hate males last week so i apologise i don't know she is mike apologise for my stupidity but in the future when it's thank you your race related i will try to be a little more informed our when i go find this fuckin email this guy fuckin trash me yet he said that the seeking it starts off good just trash me which i totally getting us just like in your bid you did about the jimmy the greek its best for white people to just leave it alone doktor law maybe old but she's aware enough to know what happens to white people when they say the inward bring up racial supremacy theories see that's the part of the time i didn't watch i shot up late to that rally yellow

by the time i showed up aid already put the cross our euro everybody's hoods they took him it was a hot day i didn't want to walk in it too i thought it was like a fuckin you know a meeting or something or by the table ever down it's my father came in late so anyways so the parting comes out so i'm surprised you defended doktor law in this case there were a lot of surprise you defended outcome because i watched eight seconds or the tape because our moral i don't understand why this any debate about rachel in why any debate about rachel inequality always comes down to comedians and deaf comedy jim i don't think it does but evidently your world maybe it does i've heard this argument before well black comedians say this and that about white people and say the inward why can't i is it fair for minority communities were put up a dad i'll basic audits all that shit trying to get this part here so

who is talking about this documentary saw where some comic was saying in all make a joke is actually good job or why people like why can i say the inward the deuce like ours chris rapport what even want to say it right great fucking joke tone makes sense then the punchline is i've sailed the world i've fucked rock hell welsh could just say the f word my life would be complete do right after that it goes i think that it bothers white people because you're not used to being told that you can do something wiper well i used to be able to do and say anything they wanted now there's all these rules is that fuckin back that part of the email that's where it just one off the fuckin rails for me you don't owe me it's like i totally get it she's fucking idiot i didn't realize it because i watch that short little clip you now i should

support that shit and your offended by that which i totally get and then in the end you makes dumb general generalization about white people see we're all the same were fuckin morons jesus christ i've sailed the world fuck worker what's your parts the job with this here's what you write bothers way people that you're not being used to tall being told that you can't do something oh yeah we just run around don't ever fuck we wanted to scrape jesus christ that's that's one of the great stereotypes is that all kennedys living on fuckin martyrs vineyard rather than fuckin the majority of white people are at their majority white people sitting cubicles not the dream drowning in a sea of fuckin dead trying to get health insurance isn't that the majority of fuckin white people evidently not evidently according to this guy why people have votes

sailing the world all three hundred million of us it out you deceive turn that bear the gulf war the gulf spell there you know that where the biggest problem all those white people are the three million white people with our fucking yachts just sailing around so ass to be white you gonna walk you do and say whatever you want to do it's fucking incredible that's it men i've i've gotten into were with the eye they every fucking female comics black comics every fight they just go it's easy for you all you gotta do is show up man oh yeah that's all it is utterly in addition i just lay here and they they call me up like why why did you give me that part them because you why here you go you don't have to work for shit

you know that's a class you know that's that fuckin double standard right there ok our open and a whole another can of worms let's talk race for the next couple of weeks people this ought to bring out a lot of ugliness a classic fuckin like that's what those statements like you if you flip that thing you just said there that generalization that you made of white people there basically what we just sit around and that you people just give a shit and do whatever the fuck we want to do your basically define us by the illuminati if you flip that around and somebody white says that about another race of people than there were in like a male gibson situation are right opening up for discussion and not open this up for fuckin rednecks to come on here largesse and asked why the fuck i'm talking about i must say that like that but at what i'm saying you know what that's what i've learned travelling the fucking globe and by the globe i mean two to other continents somewhat australia and europe

i did all my research with just why people are right yeah by think pretty much people are people say you know there's a few very small percentage of people on this planet are genuinely good people everybody else is pretty much fulla shit and everybody look everybody else and i think they got it easier and all i do is you gotta do is this i got twice decided this guy this guy does this thing and i have no one wants to know what i've learned will you pampinara now because i'm fuckin moron but for what it's worth this is what i've learned in life is death life isn't fair is really fuckin difficult but if you bust your ass you gonna make it on whatever level you gonna fuck and make it you shroud yourself a positive people and you don't fuckin quit somebody kicking the fact just to get back up again you don't walk right do his foot you around you find a different fuckin avenue

build your own avenue you do whatever you want can do and everybody's got different starting positions and all that shit and it isn't fuck unfair and it's not you can fuckin do about it but you know and as some people who don't stuff because of who they are because that their there so that their their fat they're they're fucking in an asian guy with one leg ok and he can't work at a goddamn fuckin place we get a fake ten you don't give a shit deftly fuck it exists but you know what i'm gonna do it but you know what i think most people don't make it because they fuckin policies and they just tap out you know i'm talking about fucking wipe i'm actually tongue mostly wipe it because that's what i know like i got people people i know they just fuckin quit they got all these fuckin excuses why they can't fucking do it and it's like now you can you quit punched once in the face and then you just fuckin laid down and i gonna fuck blame everybody else right did them

fuck it sets of trying to say some positive here trying to be balanced like i know you like email comics are always fuckin complaining but you know i can't tell you the amount of fuckin times i would obey auditioning for festivals and the interest becoming ought to be going we need funny women where are the funny women then they would pick a fucking woman just because they needed one not because they we wanted a funny you're fucking people are not saying that female comic funny but i'm just saying there there our examples you don't you guys can all go fuck yourself i'm a balding redhead trying to get into movies are right you know crimea fuckin river i don't give a shit but i was wrong about the doktor lord think ok when i fuckin group crying about how there's no fuckin red headed action heroes out there you know jesus christ what so fuckin movie that's a number one movie in the country they get fifty eight fuck and action stars in their one of em cannot be a redhead could call

david caruso two shows pasty white ass walking up to arnold schwarzenegger gives a fuck rights they go that was tat was my that was my round about apology no sir i really felt bad about their folk and ignorant ass rather than just immediately come on and apologize i lifted up there for weeks so i get my nice pounding from everybody else yeah i mean i fuck around a sailor fucked up shit but are you now i'm trying to start you week off right i'm not trying to piss you off although probably a lot of women out there who had fuckin disagree but you know it's comedy young people people get hurt so fuckin works is the worst apology ever but come from the heart rights go fuck yourself that's how we gonna end it all right i grew up hugs sovereignty be fuckin nice it has to end with go fuck yourself

go fuck yourself i just got back from portland oregon and i had a great time up at the helium comedy club the grand opening helium comedy club and thou portland oregon is a city that i have not worked in montana because there was no comedy club for a guy in my situation to come in there and work i did work there was a local club there but it wasn't really a comedy club it yes but it wasn't like the club honest is basically what he would do he would paper the room which the showbiz term he would just just call people i talk about this last week a came fucker remember you just call people up and just say in our have this whole team of telemarketers call a p and tell them that they want a comedy show any just call enough people where he would fill up his room every fuckin neither the weak from tuesday to sunday die everybody category for free and then all

did was fuckin just throw food and drink down their throats and that's how makes a million but me the comedian stands on stage for a bunch of fuckin drunk over it jackasses who could give a fuck about the show and you eddie what they are on a tuesday night with a goddamn weapon a chair two shows friday three show saturday the guy would you wouldn't let you talk to the weight staff you think of you what a comedian through that bullshit they can at least try to get fuckin leg you know to get a little bit actually fuckin cock block you unlike nine different levels can horrific gig is tell him you and then the second you gotta tv credit and you said hey can i have an extra quarter the next time i fly across the country than the guy d just wooden return your phone call so he basically other than up and coming guys would just be booking horrific talent so potent has been really starved for any

sort of national headline is so now there's a new club out there and i was really excited to be the first gotta come to town die and have enough work to come many club and i had no idea how bad that other club was until i talk to some of the younger comics guy told me you walked in here to do a spotty moved up from my from host to feature and that club a guy calls him any like luck i make a million dollars a year just selling food that's what is it when you get on stage no bob just reason the fuckin riot act it's horrible great this model is made his money but it's fucking horrible for the development of common it's just sitting on their fuckin chest and their dicks he's not even let him get fuckin lay what data just ass whole fuckin asshole

so it's great the peasant carmody club out there and that the euro is other place for these comics to work and that they can actually see national headlines does that was a fuckin big throw for me when i was back in boston so why so if you live the portland area you know your love jack climbed out of the fir tree it come on how do i helium comedy club it's a great club and he's got sees was again next week he's gotta jimmy pardo issues jimmy pardon rightly said it is what i think there is one other person reggie watts reggie rots on wednesday and jimmy pardo from the never not funny podcast use crisis my goddamn memory i knew those somebody else go check out though shows next week and our support calmly club that actual book somebody who's funny and on television look ploughing ahead here

what's the next thing on the dark i really have i dont have shit this week i want my seventeen minutes it s a bad fuckin tap out of forty minutes you know if you guys don't go home early every once in awhile and just fake a fucking injury at work try to pretend like a forklift drove over here for some shit you know i really wanted to do was i wanted to look up at five our energy here on the internet five our energy this is how i do my research now five our energy i think is liquid cocaine and i think it really fucks with the year i think it's bad so rather than just look up five our energy consumer reports i'm going to search five our energy unhealthy say and this is our most people do research they already have their mind made up and then they just read shit that agrees with them

now according to were fuck face dot com i'm exactly right so effects of five our energy drinks shots are they unhealthy and how let's read this one this is the first one that came up side survivors ok i was launched today and my friend was trying to get someone drink five our energy caffeine shot so i i opened it and smelt it instead i give it a shot anyways i think you spoke to mix them in a drink but i straight shrugs chugged it and almost gag the taste after i swallowed it took me like fifty minutes to get that horrible taste out of my mouth i tried eating food chewing gum drinking but the two state my mouth for like forty minutes i felt every time i thought about the taste i think to taste bothered me so much jesus why do research are you gonna get to do with the part we had a heart attack so i can feel it i'm right

like the taste bother me so much anyways i'm shy so after the taste and sickness whereof i was filled great all day and i felt probably the happiest i have all school year because all my subtle tendencies wore off did more outgoing and funny like do around friends they just turn this due to a fuckin coke head that's plastic reason why people do drugs helped me loose naw man i could talk to the chicks there's nothing on here you shit me gives a fuck i just what are you getting our sleep when did you start that you'll get somebody us another mother call in recalling a right in going back to that fuckin now that shit i said about stay at home moms

again they were doing she was she was saying i totally agree with you i understand you're absolutely right they have no right to become saying it's the most difficult job ever and then she wrote three paragraphs about how differ hold it is to be a mother and to be worrying and having the responsibility of another life and it's like i like i dont get it i know i don't totally get a component of a kid but you know enough already all right like that other listener said you chose to be a mother you're acting like all of a sudden you got like a fuckin terminal disease you don't is bringing up the bad shit what about when you have you have a bad day come home and that kid what do you know all that innocent just looks at you suggesting you're bigger than life what about that doesn't that that that you know wash away some of these spittle on yours the blade yeah what's funny actually ironic was i've just watch it sixty minutes and they have won

guys on the fucking bp oil rig and i said when they jumped off of it it was the equivalent of job a three story fuckin brownstone evidently it's the equivalent of jumping off a ten story fucking building that's what they did that was a choice standing there the middle damn ocean either right burn up or i jump into the fuckin oily water without whose brutal ok so while you bob stand the fuck down give me shit i was just fuckin joking around i've you left apologize and everybody so we re to be today from new zealand park is really gonna be random semi wrote it from our new zealand our second about this topic that four people all these random greece who listen to this podcast start nominating who i think the coolest person from your country is it with you new zealand i think two no brain or its phil rod

then he called the knacker display the exact i'm drumbeat for fucking thirty five and he's such a tough bastard that no one has the balls to tell him to switch it up you know philip how bout boom check boom jack jack you know about that fuckin guy the whole fuckin the whole goddamn album thank you just goes in their right and he just starts fuckin plain that beat and then they just they just play the whole song the whole fuckin outermost worth the socks when they do they just they just start yet fell fell its we're done yeah we made another album it is our i start breaking down his kit how'd you get nothing i really written about phil rudd kosovo as big box in europe it gonna fuckin here

oh here we got you know when i read this right here now i got something this will take up a good three fuckin minutes you don't i despite gases is difficult now can relate to me you know you sit there and you goddamn cubicles on a fuckin monday unless you want of course you're out on your yacht in i'll check it out with a kennedy the stock market gonna crash again gimme the heads up there tell the porter rickards that's what it's like that's exactly what it's like there is now people work and farms slaves to corporations not at all not at all you'd do you that you are you have to get up here i have to get up i spent nine years in bed just cause i was white and they just fucking tulares i made more money then than when i worked great it is to be white it's so fucking easy god for people who aren't why you ve never been why

tell me what it's like to be white it also let me tell you something about me and white white guy good it is oh yeah we reincarnated which are frank and another life is that a white guy named fuckin know all right so anyway i'm pissed off a bunch of people i've i just want to try to redeem myself and show you that it's not all bad i that's not all bad you know i do fire some people has one for milk white vice is the name of this this email somebody semi said bill few things are the last five years i've been six feet tall two hundred and forty pounds i'm trying to work out with no results and no willpower i usually lou five founds give up and said and each shit however utah on the podcast a few weeks ago about bill clinton and al gore

sloshing around the white house i believe i said sachet around the white house with their milky way hips was in a quiet room with above fifty people and blurted blur laughed out loud laughed loudly blurt laughed loudly that's really worded strain it burst out laughing erika ever since stan i will be sitting watching tv looking at my red mill and i will say to myself watch your ass up there and work off those milky white hips or so linked to that effect it makes me laugh every time and realise how pathetic i've been it's been above three of this every day and forty five minutes on the treadmill i'm down to two other nay parts well on my way to my goal of a buck eighty or mama due to my name is lindsey

i know you don't have a lot of female listeners so if you ever feel like you need a quote or just a woman's approval on something you do feel free to use my name just say yeah this chick linsey i know this chick lindsey who takes it i am more than willing to compromise my sexuality for the furthering of your career i would by five anything billboards endorsing our right day go there's a good evening congratulations you down to utter eight key going glad of a bloody distant bring all negativity to the party this past week i felt fuckin horrible about it you know i've been kind of can't again this week that's what i do you know you came back didn't you you know i don't know any better i'm just a white guy lay in bed i can't remember the law time i've had disappointment in my life

just doesn't happen just doesn't and you know sometimes the sale on my schooner will break an option i got jesus christ and then act the government i say can you work in a semi another one d likewise what color you i say white guy i go right on the way you know i agree first half of the email this guy i'm making fun of but i would love to send this guy my fuckin taxes i really would these motherfuckers what a lot of people to realise is that rich people feel there's enough rich people and they got all kinds of fuckin they take a fuckin pipe he a god damn knees every fuckin quarter they make sure they can only be they can only be it a certain number of our fuckin rich people unless you just invent some shit god i don't know i don't know what you come up with the technology for like an ipod and even then i maybe they'll just don't

i always like a scientist right i'm really getting to know over my fuckin head here get army you come up with face but could you invent anything that's the way now you can actually become fuckin rich weren t right now not fuckin telling jokes fuckin assholes can assholes god fuckin quarter i gotta go i am not going to get into what am i gonna fuck and get it skimming himself fuckin mad you tat i think getting ahead of me i haven't made the fuckin set out that's what i do every quarter you sit the fucker you stay right will you rat sit right what you're right so what it is anybody else this is even a color thing anywhere else in the fuckin middle class go fuck enrich pricks fuckin less goddamn eight years they make an attack

fuckin money knobs shit it's the fan and they run out of a goddamn restaurant leave everybody else fuck it check like an unbelievable my ever gonna get that fuckin car i got the plane today and somebody had to dodge challenger and the all white like the vanishing point guises that movie with that do kowalski scanner white charges so they did this tribute to its all fuckin white and the guy had these fuckin rooms on it and die just sat there drew and add my girls look at me like she's right jesus christ you are obsessed with that car as i care enough i am well you're not setting here you just gotta play you could say a load of me you know not that reminds me of my fucking went to go to this p place i really try to do fun things when i was in portland try to be healthy i went for a fuckin hike

with my smooth ease off drop in pounds here anyway something tells me that in portland they have this fuckin writ they got this pizza parlor where they had the best goddamn pizza and all the fuck north west to this guy has like this homemade goddamned dough and he make so much of it every day when he's done making the dough he's done making pizza go fuck yourself right so am i cannot well shit i gotta try this pizza so i go on the internet i look up i see where it is it's right on hawthorne street like forty four then hawthorne forty six and arthur and such like dat right saw my car and i gotta go check this fuckin thing out so i allow i get myself an hour and a half before the show to get there to get a goddamn pizza writes a fuckin pizza kay so i call up some told me to cut this just to call this place and i

up to it rings like eleven twelve fuckin times and nobody picks up some guy you know the probably busy no big deal i gonna i'll get there were an hour and a half before right i get a goddamned care i'm driving over their care private goes out just let you know this guy's kind of like the pizza nazis like that like the fuckin soup nazi on sign felt so i show up and i in law behold the places pack but i see this little to top gets up it uses clean and off the table she walks away so i go over i sit down you re order the pizza check our people ordering of getting excited is what i'm trying to tell you wait just comes oversees i were you ever in the waiting room next door or did you just like walk in here and sit down and i was like i just came in and sat down she yeah you have to like fine in next door

people everything's everything's a question and yet like steiner next door and online ah i i go well how long the way she's like wow i can't really like say you know it's kind of busy at that point a quarter of a go well i gotta show at eight two quarters seven am i don't have time to order a pizza and eat it she's like yeah now thou and then that's when my blood starch fuckin boiling because i realized what i just walked to what i walked into i walked into the subversion of pigs hot dogs out here in fact an ally the pizza version of magnolia bakery in new york city or that fuckin place we get the hot dogs in chicago you know our fifteen minutes to make a fuckin pizza you can't do that skies

you're acting like you know like he's making some sort of gore may put a tear right now that's my overrated for the fuckin weak standing in line any restaurant these do not that the the breakfast place in your neighborhood you girls like oh my god the french toast is did die for and use stand there and fucking line never worth it never the hype ok you anything from this podcast other than an ignorant asshole don't we stand in line for fucking food ok unless some there's a net disaster the places flooded and this this open out fucking piece soup you know put it india baseball hath then you'll stand and lie soup kitchen you stand and lie but don't stand outside these fuckin places it stupid it's never worth it you know fancy trot you don't stand outside collop you make fucker reservation that stuff and i d like i'm waiting to fuckin today

make out the upset you know me fuckin people in new york they stand outside for ninety minutes for a cup cake for fucking cupcake on three seconds just get a piss me off his feet in portland ok there are actually going to figure out what pizza parlor i'm talking about and then they can t tell me do it's totally fuckin worth that these low self esteem douche bags who just allow themselves to get totally treated like absolute fucking shit for pizza yeah sorry i can't make a pizza within an hour and fifty minutes we know what fuck you and your fuckin so when you think about that in your number one god damn rating i've got a pizza hut eat their fuckin slop you're telling me that i know we have to go back i have to try people hyped it so much that's what i'm really mad about his eyes i know as much as i just and talked about that shit i'm gonna have to go back there and go get it

his eyes wandered yelled at magnolia it's it's a great cupcake but it's not that great it's not that greater to stand there and listened an awful conversation you have people rising by looking at you trying to figure out what are they standing in line for you know the president they're doin a book signing is porn star there's gonna blow you at the front of the line can i raise the stakes for something funny within the last seven minutes i'll fuck this fuck this podcast here we go up why don't i nominates some youtube videos for the weak everyone a ton of arms and i'm gonna make the bold ryan statement that i think pretty god damn soon if not already the emma i guess dot com is going to have the best fucking youtube video collection of you videos are right may cause you guys are on the cutting edge lot of these videos that you guys semi they all i got

i can of ten thousand to forty thousand fuckin head some of them have i hundred thousand or so like down even a few million but it's really funny i don't give a shit but i think that we're on the cutting edge of some shit i kiss too i found that have little only you know in the tens of thousands of hit some assuming you haven't seen them ah look up prank of this century woman puts on a mask and scared the shit out of this other woman and at its ujiji gotta watch it a great and then piss off pistol cat freaks out look up that one and we got allows people you guys like violent shit i'm trying to categorize them now by the way the amend podcast as the official fan page of the monday morning podcast if you don't have to give its opinion to go on youtube and try to find six different videos right can it in and all that shit you're gonna get caught

your work you not supposed to be doing it but if you just suddenly type in the unemployed cast our common nobody's fuckin looking all of them are gonna be right there and you can watch one after another or you can make it last the whole fuckin day you can even dry the five hour fuckin energy just start screaming at your screen if you want it all up to you twenty waste is a couple i for you fight fans out here that's love look up choked slam our destiny with the fucking video she's referee roughing a fight and its chokes lamp look it up i write his kind of acute once as little girl boxer it's actually a boy is now pretty boy bam and you gotta look at this fuckin kid this kid would the shit just imagine this kid fighting another fifth greater and this is the most insane one boss

street fight guy with bat does damage boston street fight guy with bad as in baseball bat does damage what else we got some ridiculous ridiculous swollen and south philly i walked around like he's gonna fuckin hard on having conversations with people sort of an old bit i've seen it done before with this guy does a great rustling fans we got two for you are much your man on coke and the ultimate warriors confession is absolutely fuckin brilliant you gotta look at that one oh more vi its office work or goes insane sex angle evidently the some new footage what else this is a great one look up the turtle man this one might be my favorite

this guy's missing all his front teeth and when you find out how he's missing his teeth it's just one of great stories that he just alludes to it it's fuckin awesome issues is redneck who just fucking catches turtles and die i swear to god i would pay admission to sit on the side of the pond and just watch the sky catch and turtles it's fuckin hilarious and die you getting the covers we talk about the worst covers of all time here's a great one best covers i've ever seen just as far as being creative look up stairway to heaven the beatniks that's all one word be eighty and i exit fuckin cool is help really fuckin cool they do stairway to heaven the way the beat we do it really fucking really creative speaking of movies is one for you is this conversation with somebody on the internet they sent me an email and they

talking about how why you know they're not married yet so that kind of hanging out with people who were younger than them so they get along bombed out when they make references to movies that nobody's seen before so why started shown of some of the classics like the dirty doesn't that type a shit he asked me you know what does some of them fuckin movies i recommend would then let it too like music and that type a shit isn't it arctic voice you guys have like songs you must have these these fuckin songs that the second you here you can't hear the song without thinking of the movie you don't owe me course you do he i'll give you a classic falcon example and i think even the broad will know this one that i get if i had it all fuckin chewed up i really am the worst kind ever do this is why i started off in fucking radio and then my career quickly ended because i would do that all beginning illicit

forty a m w c b broadcast service a fuckin whatever the i used to say on a second let me get to you to god dammit bill and now this love she would happen a play the other one well now i can't do it the inability to do that shit we set them i doubt hang on a second once you act like you workin for once all right now i'm yelling at your cause i fucked up what the hell's enable that fuckin savannah son up there something soft in air it is i got it hang on hang on you fucking can't come on come up should i added this out you notice is like is when you fucking

some are just told you what their name is and then somebody you know comes walking in and you go to introduce them and you have no can i do who they are that's hans taking right now right what what movie does this remind you have instantly but i no what you know the movie right i know mostly another even abroad will get it you know this i wait for the breakdown away for the breakdown of where the hell is it how is it i had this whole fuckin thing cute up this power right here you don't remember this i have indeed the sound effects member that reservoir dogs when it cuts the falcon do dear off

i used to love that goddamned song and i couldn't do it for ten years because every time fuckin earned it i just about marvin nash getting his goddamn ear cut off stop yelling at a fuck what it what a great piece of acting by both of those guys whether played marvin nash adopt mr blot i can ever make people's fuckin names will convince gilligan anonymous fuck and they had a fact that if we get his name you know most guys to play a psycho would act like a fucking psycho how they think a psycho supposed to act you know just how fuckin commie was you know that's was really fuck it scared so we cut your ear off my neck like a fucking maniac you'd almost start laugh and halfway through it i guess this guy marking being crazy but it's the calmness with which he does is another one for these are really easy flight guy movie so i need some more more suggests

since a matching at a disguise is one i down the song because of the movie i didn't realize that this fuckin irish do babbles tell in some fuckin store for twenty minutes before they get to the part that actually recognised if you can guess this one here we go what movie i understand to them rejoice to see you like what the fuck is this are you anyone get blood on the floor a mine you know it you know what he or she is dead

donovan singing atlantis that was from the billy bad scene when they a kick in the ship i can't believe that is there anything better than that in camera angle when this doing their pointed up at robert deniro character jimmy just fuckin kick in them claire couldn't do fake kicks better than robert deniro you know you just sit in a kick it see this was bad billy bed was a maid guy with some real greece ball shit we did what we we were wise guys right what's the last one i got here so i want you know as usual we know whenever people ask these questions i can end up i can't remember let's say here's one for you is it actually an interesting one that's really fucking abscesses one from a movie that the dude

it up selling this is from cool hand luke aright for those who have seen cool and look if you haven't seen cool and look you gotta watch that movie right and basically the guy did the score wrote this song this is seen what they have to tar this road and paul newman's character you know rather than just it never been like this a miserable fucking job he gets them all apt up their debts to take all fuckin day but he gets you guys so fuckin apt up they just stages fuckin they just like they took five our energy and before them they just flying down the fuckin road there all lap and having a great fuckin time and they finished the road and they actually have an afternoon off right was like paul newman's way of saying fuck you too that too to the screws is that what they call the backed entered the to the guards right so they have to have this music so they this guy wrote this score for this scheme

but the problem was it was perfect for the movie but problem was years later he sold it how far along he sold it and got played so much in this other shit that it actually kind of fucked up the movie this is this is the score this is before some older people to actually understand this is the music that they had for the tides called tar sequence when they when they tar the road and they it up selling the guy ended up selling the song for something else here it is useless to the ship ah you suck god dammit you see it's y got out a rate i used to do shit like that on the air there will be the worse break ever i am the fuckin worst i know that when a graded troy gave that song idea we go

returned the road totally makes sense wait for it what evening and welcome to the six o clock news there was a poor power activated the mud fuck is sold it to every six o clock news station the classic with your fuckin old like me anytime the fuckin news came on this is the can sign that they played when that when they actually had fuckin journalist telling you what the corporations wanted you to know but having arm jag johannsen why is it

which change it that's a fact that my brain is i was trying to think chet curtis cycle kid sake i can't say chet it's an actual fuckin name i don't name names so then i gotta go with jake for some reason i just gotta crossed up and they said jake's your hands i gave jake your answer to fuckin shot off the bed goddamn comedians alas fuckin twenty years for my money anyways yet it's called out the tar sequence so that one actually doesn't remind me of the vote the fuck that's a reverse one actually watch the movie getting into that seen in then i think there's like all of a sudden we start listening to the news so jesus christ there was probably the worst a view of any but you knew you gotta admit your definitely into it right i know guys have suggestions can you help me out i write a fuckin burned out with this fuckin podcast trying to get

ready to do other shit and i'm just you know look at me have focused sporting nazis now is that when i'm doing set a fuckin tired i doc the war is not a bad birthday focus more on our right here's one for you you know what i would actually do one i wanted to one here for two to make peace after my doctor we're a doctor laura comments here we go wait a minute wait a minute i gotta get a secretary for the ship with a fork are we here i've fuckin hate you tube i don't want you douche bag doing the fuckin thing i want the actual guy everybody don't fuckin remix hang on hang in there it is

go right right this one's mainly gonna be for raw people that i offended last week last week with a fuck is it come on now all right here we go here we go this isn't gonna remind this isn't gonna remind you of a movie this is going to remind you of a tv show watch but shows us hang on the last one come on wait a minute you fucking can't he paused i hang on this is going to remind you of a tv show what tv show

i somehow miss that when there came out that is that's the carlton debts i think i was too old for that one i kind of tat with succumbs after raw after why happy days and i wanted the cheers started bosom she believed cheers you know i believe that you know there was a bar like that and you come in just being an alcoholic was like funny in fulfilling i guess there was the sadness he completely avoided his wife fear and they never shoulder anyway you don't think that's gonna be the package for the week i have to i gotta tap out here man this this this do one on the road the day after i come off the road is really difficult but fortunately things are going well that i'm really busy so i guess i did good luck and thank you now you get used to this comedian lifestyle we just get the fuck and hang out on a monday now actually yeah i have shit to do

is annoying snout why i started being comedian i started to be comedian so i would not have shit to do you know would have a boss fuck jokes talk about my dick in all fifty states and what not believe it or not people my next day and update isn't until september knife at the company works in denver colorado let's blow some date shall we by the way my tickets for my big theatre show my big theatre or that i'm doing our on sale now i don't have the fuckin link do i where is it oh you gotta live nation dot com slash billboard tickets we just got a billboard dot com you just click on any any of the dates here i'm gonna be before that it is to start someone else's soviet zany comedy club and now tennessee on us

over twenty third twenty four to twenty fifth one of my favorite clubs to play as the comedy works in denver september tenth get september tenth eleventh i have september now tat the eleventh farragut that's what i'm working there and then starts the theatre shit i want to be at the egg in albany new york all people in upstate new york boy say come to update new york man what the fuck i'm be there be it the egg in albany new york and the following day i'm gonna be at the centre for the arts follow new york so far come on to buffalo my she hit not a bunch of towns i haven't been to fuck it forever another city a city i've never done stand up in a full set i've done a guess said but i've never a gig out there i want to be at the pen ages

judges pan and ages whatever the fuck it is theatre in minneapolis minnesota on toby twenty second the following day i'm gonna be it the vic theatre in chicago illinois on october twenty third and any other once i get another theatre date on november nineteenth the listener auditorium washington d c the last theater i have is the more theatre in seattle washington on the twenty seventh god billboard dot com and dad click on the links in the lower left hand corner and you can check out all that bullshit and hopefully you come out to the shows will see how it goes

for those you wondering if i'm just going to try to do theatres exclusively now i'm not i'm always gonna be doing the clubs clubs like the gym keeps in shape when you do five six shows and then every once in a while like like buffalo i don't know they don't really about like a big time calmly club out there no disrespect buddy out there so why just come in you try to do with theatre same thing with albany these dark honour those really smaller fucking towns or x company comedy markets in them that's just when you know that comedy club is just nay nay billina like me slackers you know god damn it you're funny it was ready to laugh it all they got awful fuckin names and yeah they try to make a stand a comedy conduct so that's why i always avoided those things that i try to stay in the bigger markets where i could they ass she put me in a hotel

like you i like my comforts so why that's that's the big my big tore coming up and is also date there i miss than columbus ohio that's a club date november twelve thirteen and fourteen in the fucking out kills me its outcome that's all gonna go by and another years gonna go by well as you know by the that tore football seas be three quarters over how fuckin sad is that at least the regular season who do you like by the way anybody but for some predictions about try to do some protections and whoever comes the fuckin closest it's an autograph had autographed deed de my brand new dvd let it go caused by that will be the end of the seas and i'll fuckin sent not do that then you won't fuckin by it right i need to get you to bite got there i suck marketing anyways that's ass for this week was very disjointed i you know they can all be gold

you know even paid manic frozen interception every once in a while in the file drive of a fuckin superbowl does any but doesn't he she saw what's his face drew breeze finally getting some props he came in there our group jungle but that unbelievable intensity that that vein down the middle of his forehead that's one of my favorite announcers out there or kellerman whatever the hell that guys doing that goes to shit it's not that better than an expert ballplayer this this is provided that they have been casting skills somebody the game coach the game and that type a shit you get the classic like broadcast like like an owl michael's of sunlight dare to call the game and then i then you got your crew thank you thank you for breaking down as if we didn't fuck a notice what are you admit build it you just babbling at this point to somehow try and make it to arm up to fifty seven minutes that qualifies i can tell at this point

you guys leave sometimes three minutes before five so what have we learned this week we learn that even on major topics like race bill really doesn't do is research we learned that i at whack they got some fat guy with the milky white ties to laugh at himself and he's lost forty pounds on a totally a bad guy dad i guess from the troops come back sent him a drink or get get him to get him a blow job i shut your face and have it the day they they feel the same way of that support the troop bumper sticker says i do you like taken one marine his point you're just saying that that's everybody's well that's what the fuck i do that's what i do support the troops i said it was ridiculous what those bumpersticker it that said i support the troops it's like well why wouldn't you when you were you route for the the other team so fuckin obvious i support the troops eyes

tastes good i like babies you know what you can have all kinds obvious bumpersticker on the back you fuckin car i saw guy at a big heart on onest on his side of his house it said love our troops it just really gave me the every time i see i wanna fuck and rip it down it up either the guy rape robbie an angry fuckin email all about the politics about setting the troops over there yet our society like he was fuckin drop in all this knowledge man about what's really go went on with the war man you know like i don't realize like i realise that shit but i also realise that those guys don't determined where the fuck they go right i'm just trying to be a dick you know there have been a dick enough haven't i i'm gonna be honest with you i have no idea what i said for the last eleven minutes but all i know is i recorded it in your listening to it okay so whose worse

you guys just shaking your heads right now he's really losing his mind well maybe i am that's it so i gotta get like two three weeks off on be hanging out gonna do a lot of spots down the comedy store if you're in los angeles can be workin out my ship if you want to come down their watch me bomb lean on the i stand and stare at that all whether carpet is i work out my bits

pop it down the comedy store that set thanks everybody wrote in his it taught you guys next week