hey what's goin on its bill bar it is time for the thursday afternoon just before friday monday morning podcast in just check in on you checking and just seen a few weeks ago and you know you know i would take a thousand new york yankees fan despite the fact that only a couple a games up for the one game play off i would say that i'm having a pretty good fuckin thursday you know you see the last couple of gave did you see last night's game in particular i'm ok guys right now i'm going gradually we knew off of war king espn fox sports was listening to the fed ok nobody gets it right now at times in my own mind in my own world with

doing any research on how any those other people army times they get it right nobody gets right more than the main right what the fuck did i say while billions we have said a lot of things are fair enough i have said a lot of things they mention this fuckin wire sucks jesus rice god forbid i turn my fucking this is unbelievable to brand new fuckin wire does anything work is this how like china is going to slowly like they know they can't fucking bombers right so what do they just make everything just a little bit not fuckin right and it just it's gonna gradually drive from fuckin crazy now what do i gotta move this thing over here bring this up good god forbid this any weight on this wire the second this wait all of a sudden it doesnt work now

does it come on i need to hear myself i need to hear myself talking about how great i'm all right day yoga i told you motherfuckers i'm not mad at you guys like you ever said no you didn't bill you never told us that right fuck my water jesus this can be one of these thou there it is there i told you way back and fuckin august when the red sox swept the yankees any because a fucking over what's over espn oh i guess maybe a divisional race who gives a fuck you know what i mean is still the wild card the fuck you why that's why there's an ax murderer outside you fuckin house and you just lock the front door and you leave the act or wide open like y gasset takes care of that not to mention the other one door you know

that's a motivated acts murderer he came to just chop down the door gee actually would work in your favour gives you time to try to find something to defend you know defend yourself these acts you know technically speaking will be a little more dull classical through the front door this is all beside the point i told you motherfuckers backed and how they can tell david ice goes into the fuckin menace open your costume unwanted goddamned game i don't give a fuck that out there sweeping the baltimore orioles right regular season stats you know what that's like that's like the guy who was the fuckin big man on campus in high school varieties of fuckin allies a captain it is he's got the dimple in his pocket chinese bang and a fuckin cheerleader right never like oh my god can't you gonna be the president right now what happens

you go back to the reunion it looks like magna he got i'm just saying i like it does it make a difference if you win eighty nine games or a hundred and twenty nine games what matters is how you're doing against the fucking teams that you're gonna see in october you know but that's the business that so so so sovereignty as pm fox news and whatever else some i'm lumping into the same fuckin category that's not the game therein in the game of what the fuck you see is what the fuck it is and we will hide the shit out of it and not even remotely look at it equally so then if what happens happens you can be like i said it was going to happen but what you said was going to happen doesn't happen then you get to do the one what happened was you gotta enamored by a bunch of fuckin victories against

orioles in the fuckin tigers in bunches data jacob coming you guys gave gay hit like over nine thousand all ranging irregularly season and gay were absolutely anemic us won't yet well how did they go against the fuckin asked rose sorry anyway you don't you know that's like that it's like watching paul i love paul the death i gotta get him on this i have to get him on this fuckin podcast cause i'm always making fun of it i want you guys know that it comes from a place i love your right most times it comes replace a left or right now it comes from a place of concern ok well dumbest fucking things that you can do the same buying a fucking god damn i fuckin speaker wire from blame in iran china ok it's always a great gets everything spoken made over there

like when you get your ignat don't you like what what's the main and great ingredient in here the one guess you have his court corners in everything you don't believe me watch the one documentary i ever watched about food now our using that is my bible i sought years ago so probably miss quoting it having said that no what i just said was effect one of the dumbest things you can do is the first game with a weak bet a bunch of fuckin games are right am i talking about fantasy shit and i'm not talking about other people the sports gambling podcast that i read advertising that i told you to go to go out and do that exact fuckin thing so this be hypocritical not for me to tell you this but you know you don't know the fuck anybody is until about two three fuckin weeks in right i've

i did tell poverty this poverty is the king of bedding football knowledge your problem in fact when i first became friends with him back in college football was brilliant to realize that they they needed to have some good match up in the first few weeks to get people into it to pull them away from the nfl in this this is what happened even though i haven't looked at the ratings i'm saying it's happening therefore it is happening ok now these goddamn feminist and me tours can just say things happened without any evidence and god damn it i can say this is happening with now evidence no research no not gonna write fucking college football is is is getting better ratings right now than the national football league dare i say a presidential address ok

enough netflix doesn't have to give out ratings then why should i have to look at it that's what i say anyways pop ups this is like ten fucking years ago twelve years ago and at first newport this is when they had all cupcake games stably the rankings for whatever reason they would have like ohio state doping eleanor rabies fuckin fucking nursing home right now school of nursing or some shit right and then they would be favoured by like fucking eighty points and buck inversely would go out in just the first of football you know being knowledge coach is so much harder than being a pro professionals coach simply because every three three four years you get a brain you fuckin team you just constantly every years a fuckin rebuilding you now these goddamn millennials which they're not

he has once again nineteen eighty to ninety ninety five to twenty three to thirty eight years of age actually just told a thirty eight year old woman yesterday that she was a millennium and she couldn't i can't believe i say yes you are according to the one website that i went to it didn't even look at a second one even back it up you are a millennium she said i dont identifies millennial and i was are you angling for your own bathroom i don't know i'm doing this when examining what the fuck is going on the world right now i just know it's a fucking everybody is in a goddamn hissing fit about everything so i just know and i know that if you dont need evidence you don't need fuckin anything people just they things and then it's not only the person that did the thing it's the person that stood next to the guy that did the fuck it thinks so in the future god forbid four falcon bid you standing on the subway platform and somebody jumps in front of a trained to commit suicide

they're gonna blame you for assisted suicide because she stood there and did nothing sir yes probably a slight exaggeration bobby barrier i probably should read up on the story little more i probably know what i'm talking about i've only been upload this but i might but if your listening to you not dead so far as you would go out any fuckin which is just the first we could college football you have no idea who the fuck anybody anybody is and he would just he would you but it's a law literally a job nebraska given fifty eight need fuckin bet on the favourite he's doing it again this year are less a fucking bets about you know he's got that that fuckin homecoming theory a good

protein coming off the laws playing the next week at home he doesn't give a fuck how many fucking points they given he can't lay off so we call on the lions the hapless lions their hapless lions it's just like dude that first game though year they had a shit one ok everybody's gonna shit came the fuckin patriots just had a shit game against a jaguars but it was we too so nobody saying that that's who they are but last year they had a shit game against kansas city and all of a sudden the whole fall the wheels we're off the tom brady era was over what had happened tommy brady broadest right back to the fuck insuperable he threw four five hundred yards over five hundred yards in a game any lost these are different sucked that game because they were the only held nick falls to over three hundred yards jake

was a great day if the other guy through four five hundred about everyday renal come out with victory didn't want me so last week versus telling me that the lines was lines you take jimmy a common home safely cisco it's a lock and his texting me the whole game is san francisco is winning say what did i say i said it all week exclamation point sees an absolute euphoria that he said something that now look like it was going to happen and he's looking at matthew stafford like this can guide likes to lose every week this guy doesn't have any pride like this may take it out there the next now the fuckin lines come back in the end and then covering the spread now we ve fuckin ben aright so you learn from you passed for your passion key gamble it but now you come back for more

what is worse it again this week he's too in the patriots deplore i think that of april somebody plain keith column the hapless lions because they had one bad fuck and weak so now the lines applying the patriots are former for coach is coaching the team he's been what he would ever met patricia there that guy doesn't know some of the shit that we do now i must say the patriots will go in and kicked fucking chair i say the pages what the fuck him save i'm just saved you just lost ready against this fuckin tape and used they'll call em they're hapless spoken lights they run on the road the almost beat the fuckin forty nice they had one bad fucking game

this brings me back to the fuckin red sox are right they sweep the yankees beginning of august that everybody falconer all these guys in these fuckin sport shows they put tasseled fuckin loafers up on the desk full their fingers on top of their head that's fucking over it's all its it over it's not so that's fucking over so my prediction the red sox i just think we don't have the fuckin one to punch we don't ever wanted to as far as i'm concerned starting rotation that you need you know we just don't have it so i think we're gonna win a bunch of fuckin games and then we are going to lose in the play us i dont want that to happen i didn't want to say that to you i don't want to ruin your fuckin day but you know until la price starts fuckin winning

yankee stadium i just don't fuckin see unless we're gonna play for straight fuckin gay are you know only start at home my god i love the guy he's a fucking amazing pitcher and everything i really needed him no one less than i needed ok i needed it because you know i i you know i'd live through sports that's that's how that's what i do ok they're ok does that make you feel better now then i'm a fifty year old man alone in a room right now talking into a microphone hoping that somebody's listening nodding cream and almost and get through that word listening the zoning then we'll have things you want to talk about i will to this is like my own mister roger show you know it's a beautiful day in the neighbourhood a beautiful day in a neighbor come the current through the

fucking door he has always wanted to be right about something in sports even though it has no effect on his life so let's all fucking listen to this shit send him soon emails and say do there was it you figured it out you're a genius go fuck yourself you're redcoat sorry go fuck yourself go fuck years i always have to finish this on please you sell you freckled cunt anyways not in watching the news me workin on rightness swept right now some haven't been watching anything and it's fucking tulares to not watch the news to not what's what's going on because all your friends you just constant are just sending you tax all caps are you watching this or they can did you see this

see that more cuban thing did you what trump said did you hear about the falcon albatross digits did you see what happened in bolivia it's fucking hell it's never anything good never never anything fuckin good anyways so i don't i don't know what's going on i did watch the mark you would think for like a minute man that was fuckin that was brutal there now that we are right there that that's that's one of the brutal wants they know maybe there's they'd know maybe that lets you straight up has just spoken jesus christ i don't know i gotta tell you heard this podcast liked that's the way we run our business here now the genius of my

my guess is theirs does nobody else here therefore i can't get in trouble i dont send emails to myself at no point will ever be on the yes piano broadcasting sitting there shifting uncomfortably trying to answer questions that i have the answers to i just don't want to tell them to you because i know it's it's i did the wrong thing or maybe maybe in the future there will be something like that i just want to see wondered what is a woman gonna be fuckin squirming what about the woman who fuckin date rape that that a seventeen year old guy who fuckin was talking all that shit about army wine state and then she fuckin paid the kid often and blame that on a dead guy we're why isn't she shifted around ask it answer and fuck and uncomfortable fuck and questions

you know sometimes is dear season sometimes it's elk season i guess it's still dear season i can what when when is it going to whip up when is it going to flip around that's why i don't look at it i saw this woman she wrote in like twitter she's just like all this one guy he was able to come out back after fucking six months it wasn't six months was close to a year so they are fucking shaved off some months and monica whisky wasn't able to come back for twenty years it's like what are you talking about and she wasn't she did nothing wrong well i think hilary would probably debate that it's like she hosted essen elf she wrote a pocket book she had a line of purchases she had a show they try to get on the air of cheap not only she fucked became a cottage industry offer that thing

what are you talking about anyways by item by debts is just like at this is fucking thing that women are doing what they just keep pekin over the fence and all this scene is green grass you know i don't do so fucking it's like what are you looking that's all you see you only see green grass the gay just working show up and people just given stop the guy did something wrong in aeroplanes people will be totally work they sound like fuckin five year old i'm not saying there are double standards everything but like what pick one that's actually a double standard seed off the fudge shit that's then your whole thing is just gonna fuckin collapse or maybe you do research this woman actually said she's honour fuckin stumped she saying

after the monocle whisky think that bill clinton was those then reelected it's like he wasn't it happened in his second term do a little research emmy what what what do you mean it will have things will work to yell about i will too when a woman well she's your tea she can feel the whole to various community judging or what a guy brushes don t feel like you should write a company the same year in traffic up and go traffic ladys just just look at the looks on the guy's faces look at the cars their driving

to any of them look like they're even in remote control remotely in fucking control of their lives please be honest with yourself ok in the average relationship boy girlfriend kate married whatever life partners the end of the day ok if she wants to get brunch in the guy doesn't what do you think you're gonna do what is the guy's options does he have any at the end of it whose really calling the shots if only one person has life insurance ok if is only one fucking parson that's a benefit from the other person's death

on average who is that person and become a peep happy wife happy life ways the cute little room for the guy there isn't one because we don't matter we'll call they hate valentine's day about the woman why because they know then every guy is living the fuck male female dynamic which is keep it happy maybe it will fuck me keep it happy maybe i can watch the game keep it happened maybe i can enjoy twenty minutes of my weekend it is one that is the world most men are living in but if you go on the internet

and you go and social media most men are blocking a doorway while using on a plant a company tony when you're in traffic just look look it's i'm telling you just look at the sight of somebody's head and you know who the fuck there you can see how much hope they have left or right i challenge you why does i think doing that shit would you i challenge you to find a lot of hopeful fuckin guys out there did you see something else to me she looked at that can that without woman out there in hawaii telling men d just shut up and do that right thing for once to fuckin political office and it just talking like that just shut up and do the right thing all the guys asking for is is

to say his side of the story she's basically saying shut up don't listen to the guy side of the story as this woman says all these things that's going to destroy this guy's career i'm not say what the woman saying is true or isn't true but the guy he did he doesn't have the right to defend himself yeah thanks for once i have but we do that when you push away from the buffet table there's an ice low blow for you and i am proud of doing it the ten minute misconduct this become its becoming literally shut the fuck up all guys shut up and listen to one side of the fuckin story and then that's the story you know the story is my story your story doesn't count because you the fucking dick that's the world that we're going into right now in evidently it's like progressive it's fucking insane it's insane

and right now if one of these crazy women listen to this day completely twist what i just said and say that i'm actually against women who ve been abused get some sort of justice which is not what i'm saying i'm just saying that there you have to listen to both people and then way the evidence you know even that is of a flawed fucking system it's the best system we have now you're gonna take that system and you're gonna throw it out and now you just gonna say frankenstein movie they're fucking come on up the hill with torches just shut up and age you could tell him a little emotional you saw like she had that whole fuckin pink planned out like sheep that you know she thought she was gonna get like a bunch of hits which obviously data five fucking heard about it i don't know it's literally it's like mccarthyism meets fuckin i space is

it's going on right now guy she's show up in everyday work where we show up to it meanwhile the average guys drive and some sort of shit box to work workin for somebody else in a job that he never really dreamed of having as a kid that's most people's fuck in reality but not on social media social media every guys out their run in a company lobster fuckin lunch making secretary short term tits like that's what's happening that's all that every so every guy out they shut up how dare you try to defend yourself and everything you workforce shut up do there david shad app

just a comedian me i can't lay off the shit it's so fucking funny that like you're literally watching women's reaction to a b of power and now they have power and they instantly start abusing it is yes just completely going off the fuckin rails here and most people male and female understand that but all of us are too afraid to tweet or say fuck in anything because then like has then you have to literally apologize i want somebody in my business have to go and an apology tour for literally having an opinion he was an innocent man who had done anything fuckin wrong he just had an opinion and he had to go out and apologize for have an opinion i will pay you person whether painted and we'll have things you'll want to talk about the right of veto spray everybody

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she people out there that do that ok the woman working should honour a trace the bloodline these goddamned pigs pure bred eggs all the way back to the original pigs i came across the fucking atlantic i don't know if they came across with christopher columbus if it was with the nina the pinta in santa maria it wouldn't surprised me today if some feminist group actually claim that a woman sailed first in that nature and wind in general is its much harder for a woman to sail then for a man i don't know happened but he's fucking pigs came over here and

evidently there was so goddamn delicious they did not let these pigs breed the pigs that were already here i don't know what whenever fucking reason decent these like you know these are pure bred did these they like the like the royal family of pigs so they had this amazing bloodline but also there's a lot of interbreeding the probable crazy the thing is when you get the porch up it's dead so can't get so i recommend eating these pigs do not have them as pets get back to the copy the incredible quality of butcher box meets stay that's with a commitment to to raising animals humanely in free of antibiotics and hormones before they martyr each part comes with the least eight to eleven pounds of meat which is unknown

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first generation i said knickers by the way as an pants before i get in trouble he'll sleep everybody does nobody the planet like you so would you buy a generic mattress built for everyone else please it's in the talking points below of course he like sleep alex matches your body to the perfect mattress so you get the best sleep of your life it doesn't matter if you have back that if you had and tat if you have a crooked knows ok i i'm guessing the poor you into some sort of a mould or the boy loved the mattress moulds to you like that two impressions i used to take back in the day except mattress version they develop nine different mattresses taylor specific body types in sleep preferences so evidently there's nobody like you till you get today

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that i've enjoyed as a pod castor simply because of my genitalia today i will go out into the world knowing that ended casting my behavior accordingly women you have no work to do when it comes to how you treat men just can stay the fuckin course and keep telling everybody out difficult you fuckin lives are women like what like six holidays a year specifically designed for verbally they height mother's day versus fathers day you know there's all cut flowers can you get it show your money there you dad he's gonna die first you don't owe me so there should be more of a sense of urgency when you think that now tag in my pocket tie you can block and hang himself ways jerking off in the closet that's that's the point chest

ladies and gentlemen gotta make sure i said ladies first because they have it so much harder everything no just just then breathing air more difficult on female lungs and has been proven please enjoy this music

and then we're gonna do a little what do you call it their little fucking little throw back to the to the blow back dared to the last thursday afternoon podcast never be extra half an hour of greatest sits thursday afternoon just before monday fiscal friday morning one pluck assess what is i have a wonderful weekend you can't go fuck yourself in our talk to your monday ladys tried it you know i know it's gonna be a tough we can't wait my weakens can be way easier just try to keep it has tried to catch a random bad

this sounds for concrete enemy video doorbell will insert dinging sound what does that mean i was supposed to fuckin insert ding dong sorry do again i can't do this here we go door bell this is like donald trump announcing he's running for president norville sound effect did you mean doorbell all one word course i did and see if i can do this quickly aright hey everybody video doorbell do that again our man in all kinds of ways to the podcast here hang on a second it's gotta forgive scatter reload here

hey everybody i'd like to take a little bit of time to talk about video doorbell what is really out i was this shit video doorbell this is the sound of a package being delivered her friends coming over for dinner but it's also the sound of summing plant someone planning to rob you blind jesus christ i took a left her and then it over nine point ninety five percent of home break ins happened during the day all right but what is it what's going on here i think i'm stuck on those you tube loops where they just keep playing the fuckin the door i think it works with the copy i'm gonna keep anyways it burglars always almost always start by ringing the doorbell to see if someone's home before pillaging your possessions

i guess that's a fancy to link this music to with ring video doorbell you can see and talk to anyone at your door from anywhere in the world using your smartphone hi build her what's happening dj party ok i think we're having a fire alert here ok back to the copy rings advanced motion the detection of virtue even if someone doesn't ring the doorbell it's like a collar idea for your home

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could you said the de jane is plain others mellow shit enormous and i know where i just come out the mouse had screamin count over and over again i'm not having overhead shouted at you know maybe use those drums just watching all scatter like fuckin roaches alex the desert step alongside wine this what's going on it's billboard is the monday morning podcast from andy september twentieth two thousand and ten and

i am doing this really late i apologize everybody i had a brutal day i had brutal there had nothing to do with my patriots gettin a fuckin ass his hand a tool by the goddamn jets congrats agent all you green consult their in the meadow land stick your chest out i'm sure you're happy i'm sure you proud you know you know such about it is that yet gave the week before the one that i predicted that i was for dead on write about the ravens we're gonna win and on a monday night night our recorded my podcast so i didn't to talk shit and pat myself on the fuckin back about by the time i did the jets bounced back kick the shit out of the patriots and i will say this about it actually recorded a podcast yesterday before the jets because i wanted to talk shit about it and give my prediction bud

i actually ended up being dead on in my own way but i don't think anybody was really gonna believe it but then i have some are reminded me that i actually did colleague i said take the jets in the points i didn't think on versus network this past week i trust the jets as i always do because i am preposterous fuckin hate the new york times i respect your city it's love especially in the fall walking through central park with the leaves crunching under your shoes who doesn't like to do that wonderful wonderful museums euro a rare good slice of pizza i will tell you that only because new york is known for its pizza there are so many fuckin asshole who can't make pizza have sprung up they all say that their famous i've said this shit before just starting video any you know workers want to tell the tourists where to go because i got no huge argument about some fuckin brought eaten hunt from chicago who said new year peter sucks may grant

he enjoys their lasagna whatever fuck they call their pete's out there and if you chicago tell me where to get the good deeply because the shit i get out there it's like even if you get the personal size one it's like you feel like you ate a birthday cake made out but getting saw us but by the time you done with it that level of full where you want to kill yourself and it doesn't billy taste that good but i know there's no way that does not a great spot chicago so chicago in new york have you so war tell me where to go but anyways this is what i felt about the game was basically my heart i have go at the patriots by just had that bad failing because i this theory on divisional rivalries is that they never go the way they go like remember the name of the goddamn show i was on on the versus network that's really bad took as i had a great time

and they will again come back any time i came over the name of the fuckin jokers that's how i operate i go in there totally in just go in and fuckin kill mode that sort of point that aren't even fuckin i remembered the channel that's no for me i just did fuck laura media had sudden add some me the line in it i can't remember the fourth nightline and no it wasn't that but i was actually right to fuckin weeks it around that's what's killing me analysis bobby breakdown the game this is what this is i didn't like was the the patriots defence took a big step backwards and they look like the hapless crew from last fuckin year but i'm also smart to realize that we too does not define fuck it caesar but i gotta be honest i don't like it hernandez zack i look great but i think tom

lady was being really generous when he said that we could do anything right in the second half it's like do how about after the first quarter i mean i guess we went down and we went up fourteen fuckin seven but then they march right back down the failed but anyways hopefully i am i am converting some people to my way of looking at sports which is last week does it mean shit when you got it you gotta like do like whatever the jets did being anemic or thicken the shit out of somebody you gotta do it like three four weeks in a row before you can get excited you know what i mean you just watch these analysts on tv that's like whatever somebody just did is who the fuck they are and did i say it last week on the podcast other paths had lit up three fifty yards a hundred fifty fucking yards ojo say i didn't like those numbers i did not like those numbers i still i thought

gotta be one of those conti nineteen seventeen games and i thought in the end i was praying that we gonna come out and get a victory but i did not i did not think we were going to get we were gonna get pounded and weak we got pounded in a very lightweight i don't remember any sort of big hit other than that get the end for the fumble but it was just sort of i just felt like we were in a prevent defence from the second quarter on you know i just you know you deal with that zone but people go i have to admit that fuckin this guy really pissed me off when he bird for a touched out in a grabs is heavy can do that from now on when i fuck up in life they are talking all kinds of shit numbed kill and for twenty minutes with jokes and then i tell one that bombs and then i just i start grab my hamstring and i fucking u to lay down and have somebody stretch it out

that was a really fucking bitch move a bias by the whole goddamn story i dont like uh before they gave you started reeve authority had a fuckin excuse i thank you scared from the week before not that he's back the guy's the ship but i think he was out of shape and he was worried they're ready moss was gonna run all over his i went that so fuckin gave grievous island yellow who had ever go there but you're fuckin guy i stand at around squatting doubt that court back fuckin position you know i don't speak it at that make it a gay here's an email i got recently from a gay guy believe it or not i i have all kinds of fans on that she would know this from some of those good assholes up in seattle who brow

did me a homo full because they listen to the first half of the way you a fag bit in stopped off like that can pansies that they were a guy right here right said bill watch let it go last night and it was fantastic congratulations that's hilarious no it's hilarious was i was thinking let it go is my last special held it in my head i immediately pictured my wide awake this anyway seminary let me start over watch go last night it was fantastic congratulations it was cool to hear some of the things you have talked about in the podcast turned into developed bits i was wondering you brought stuff from the stage the podcast or is it vice versa to use the podcast to develop bits i was also wondering how much import you or other comics have on editing on the editing of your specials

i've noticed that your recent special is lit differently better my opinion then comedy central specials the audience is dark in there is a nice spotlight on you instead of the house age being let how did you get that you also the commercial breaks seem to come it strange places did you to decide where they went cypher the questions bottom line is the special it was amazing the podcast his great and i'm a huge fan will you're very my city said ps you look great and better and better as you age does that and gave for one man to say to another well guess bill i am gay deal with it look at us of our great questions there winkle toes our eyes what do we got here the first one he asked he said watch let it go less those facilities or you want ring if do i take stuff the podcast it take it

the stage and vice versa there's a little bit of both but definitely more podcast hu the stage i try not to burn bets on the podcast where it's like if i actually did a bit from my act then you come and see me it's already kind of another thing that i would feel like i was fuckin you over but there's deaf the times when i reference stuff that a little like goes off from my head them like you know what that's really funny and i think that i could take that somewhere but even that even if you heard it on the park yes it is i dont say it the way said on the park ass it like continues you know what i cattle when stevie raven did is cover of say what jimi hendrix was wasn't that like two things spliced it together i can't remember was that rainy day i can't member he did he did a cover up and he just sort of took the getting riff that's right

he took to be getting ready for that he just sort of fleshed out the middle and added his hold type a shit to it so i try to do that would like that i just bring up stephen jimi hendrix of sorry sorry my fuckin egos really pumped up with all the great emails you guys sent me about special last night but yes to answer your question occasionally shit like that does go to age but i'm really sensitive about that because i don't like people i would want come to me and be like total which gives everything is out of the park is i don't wanna some becomes substances like yeah something i heard the pockets and then you you took it this other area like listening fucking meandering right now you can't do that understand upstairs people we throw em like fuckin potatoes sat me so why that's the deal if i ever do an old debt for my act i actually to say this is a bit i used to do and i use we do a bridge version so there we go

next one i was also wondering how much import you had on the editing of your specials that's a huge thing that i have input on and from why do i do this and let it go is there the specific look that i want and specific vibe that i am looking four and that in its very important to me and i think even more important than the fucking material if you can believe it just because i have seen some unbelievable comedians with shame production and it down the level your performance and that such because it's not your fault so you really have to like learn that just through liked it though the few tv movie things that i've done like as far as editing lighting all those fuckin guys the sound

all of those guys director all of those guys it's like they take a mediocre performance and make it look fuckin unbelievable and they can taken an amazing performance in may it looked like cannonball run part two if they don't know what the fuck that doing so today you go there big shot out too in industry done my last two specials and will continue doing my special because they do a great fucking job i basically tell em exactly what looking for always come out and was shifted has nothing to do with comedy they'll just we like what he wanted to look like i'm like ever see the magnificent seven when therefore sit neri those red share of wave owes a proper the fuck you say it i come adam like tat so they go ray kept great question right out of the god damn gate

but anyways let's continue on top little football here how about fuck it bears her i didn't know that like marks is is there are often of coordinator they all of a sudden overnight got a little scary like i said judge in them weeks away they basically loss to the fuckin lines and there were given that victory my apology to lions last week as i was going like you guys you playing competitive i had not seen the highlight a how you get fucked out of that game blood liked is a devastating combination does mike marks is put is like right in his fuckin we'll we'll house you know what i mean it's like deniro do a comedy and meet the parents and all that shit but all of a sudden if if they go back to doing good fellows shit he's right these debts he's fucking in it so

i don't know man that's that's that's the big thank you of all the fuckin pieces you can have the ownership you have to have the coaches and you have to have the players it's like what that fuckin matt castle i remember my body my was given me shit we traded up for a first round fucking pick a whatever the chiefly was like dude i'm the guy look it up he went eleven and five and then almost can pieces all those people who are trying to give brady shit brady was heart yet the patriots when eleven and five typical fantasy football fuckin morons they don't realize that my castle was driving a lamborghini that year he was dry the team throughout the regular season there once sixteen and oh what every fuckin game and what did he do he manage the fucking game davis five less fuckin victories but in people's heads like eleven in five man that's fucking nuts

those two kids sitting it does what it does what drives that fuckin nineteen seventy two eco liner there the kansas city chiefs thou of a sudden right you fuckin need a fuel pump the time belts snaps and right there my castle looks like you should behold the fuckin clipboard again is it is false i'll fuck it think so but you gotta have everybody so that's my point the duff in chicago pairs heaven what's his face mike march whenever the whole goddamn name is i can't even think at this point i am so sick of fuckin talking after week oppress last week in those two guys is huge is fucking huge and subject cutler looks like a good goddamn quarterback doesn't he doesn't he south with that how about some predictions i gotta talk should early pats replaited next sunday which patriot

he was gonna show up you know according to encourage goodbye stats the exact same fuckin defence showed up both fuckin weeks god dammit our defence stinks we're not gonna win shit without you know something there s actually a great i think it because i i felt like the patriots players ever got their fuckin do where we will win in those champion daddy mediocre team with no superstars now of a sunday they don't you look a teddy briski in able and all those guys in a different light maybe no fucking know what do we got me talk what they knew whence at san francisco as the divisional rivalry game at alike it everybody say new orleans is gonna run all over i don't like it it's gonna be closer than that just as there are in the same fuck a division those games are always country aright weeks three

buffalo add new england oh jesus i want to say we're gonna bounce back but i mean i don't know i don't fucking know what that defence in autism the path we have no pass rush right jeff and before i get all excited about sanchez sit back fuckin lazy boy in the pocket etc scared scramble though i will give you that but who did it tat next week who do they got who god are you guys talk and shut again out jets miami miami feature mammals fuck it insane defence you go on the road a right eye what's his face rex rides gotta put his head out of the shell he's gonna talking shit scuttle you're getting drunk gets sunburn fall asleep on the fucking beach is he's gonna be miserable down i have no idea i have no idea but i'm telling you right now they're fucking just

before your hoisted firemen up on your shoulder like you do in the village people fuck and act don't sleep on miami you don't like about miami their coach looks like he's in the fuckin witness protection programme the fuckers with that guy i watch that game and they kept cutting to him on the sidelines and i have no fucking idea what he looks like he's got a baseball had yanked down to his huge fuckin only curtis sunglasses he's got that big guy who's that guy from the big lebowski does the narration would have the guy from mask he's got one of those fuckin i oughta harley must stay i've no fucking idea what he looks like the rebate chicago that's a great one and i came all right i have to get back to the park yes here because i know a lot of people learn our raw not sports fans let me tell you about my week everybody

up to my special was i went to new york city and i did the open anthony programme wonderful program if for some reason you live in a cave and you ve never heard of it say yeah sort of a political show what a topic so discussed a magic actually i'm fucked around over the top and i gotta take jim norton had the funniest god damn joke that i don't even know got the laugh it deserved it was a funny it actually made me a better person and i'm gonna tell you why i was fuckin we had mentioned he was trying to sign something and he said that they wouldn't let em side it was like a pen to paper he had to do this virtual signing a one of that's computer thing so me being the she had had that i am immediately job into our connecting the dots that this is this big conspiracy that they want to have this computer

no a something otto i can't see i'm so stupid i can't even see i came to see how the i'm trying to say they basically then they haven't they have you basically your signature like on a stamp but it's my computer form that's for the illuminati and then later on five years if you don't like it i don't know just take out the armor nazi document and just put it computer signature right underneath it that's what they gonna do that just goes or the illuminati could just forges signature i put you did it was fucking great and it really it made me feel like exactly bill exactly you know what you just fuckin relax if there really that powerful do they really need to create schemes to that fuckin level i have to tell you i must have thought about that line maybe fifty fuckin times

i've just been walking around thickened my crazy thoughts than that joke his voice keith pop into my head going all illuminati could just forge a signature and it just makes me laugh at what a fuckin ridiculous human being i am so they go shadow to jimmy norton there but anyway it is my weeks why did the opening anti programme i do i did the verses network right time on that and hopefully will be doing more shit on that i also did the knesset where i talk all kinds of shit about the jets that i had fought on that one was just in boston so i was able to i didn't have to believe me diplomatic on that and what others pete dominic show i did brewer show all those guys words they say thank you to everybody who may run my mouth height my special thanks everybody who watched it

and sent me all the great emails and everything and tie in with that if you'd like to i'd go to amazon dot com you can actually the priests sale i think is still the resale price antonio whose like thirty in twenty six if you want to buy it for that cheap amount and then to one of my shows i'll fuckin cited for you i don't give a shit just go ahead and buy it i would really appreciate it if you guys would go out and buy it because believe it or not it really does help me as a performer if you things like that and one of things i've noticed being a huge music fan is i go on now when you too but i'm always watching you know like clips of bans and shit like that and one of the things that p keep asking is they say whereas the talent you know what i mean like where are the beatles where the stones where are where are the the marvin gaye's where are all these fucking people and

this theory granted jim north i take the fuckin piss out of this one too with one of his fuckin like great lines but it's same people asking these questions of the people not paying for music and a deck native of trying to have your cake and eat it basically the music industry doesn't exist anymore and for dirty and filthy is so sons of bitches were there we're just like this good and bad comics their word genius guys in that industry and they knew they could spot talent and they knew how to develop it and nurture before they put it out there and that type of stuff and then of course than they would steal from but that system does in fact exist anymore my business it's going the same route where tv film dvds and all those are not being paid for

people are losing their jobs and that type shit so i don't know if you comedy if you like good television suggest trying to not saying don't watch reality shows i would be fuckin hypocrite right now i love the jersey shore really ever watched season to but i watch the jersey shore but like i he'll try to watch scripted shows i pay for me yes i don't steal movies i pay for all my fucking music i don't know if you don't give a fuck than just by all means go ahead steal it but if you're one of those people whose wondering where all the bans are where the writers are they don't have jobs right now that they don't because you cannot sit on a toilet and take a shit don't know toilet sit not pollack technology

you can do that and you'll get for some reason a zillion fuckin head send i don't know i don't want my fucking point is just for the love of god can you buy the guardian dvd right there dollar twenty six said so you can pick it up fuckin twenty bucks at one of my shows i'll sign if i take a picture give you goddamn hug the fuck you need for christ's sake in kenya support my goddamn career that's all i'm asking you are right look i go on youtube to all right i'm sure i'm not saying you know i mean go there i look at shit and i'm looking at shit for free i realized that but that shit that i really like i do pay for but i pay for all my fuckin music aright goddammit what's funny is monsieur probably gonna go out and buy my dvd and i just basically did what the fuck and catholic priests would do when i was growing up what they would basically yell at the people who showed up for church so what

let's give you some forty you two clips and you can watch all of these right in a row conveniently on the young the m m podcast dot com the official fan page of the monday morning podcast and i want to thank all the listeners who go on that left all those great messages about them going out trying to get the word out i'm telling you even though you know it it helps out you have no fucking idea how much that helps me out due to the fact this five hundred channels now there is the internet there is very oh games there's people video cameras make videos for fuckin youtube is just so much shit out there this tv when all that like you do they really really helped me so i just want to say thank you ok this is really a feel good podcast you would never know that my team trounce by the team that i've been trashing oh by the way or the jets an apology

not the part where i say they're not gonna win the superbowl i won't apologise for that after week too but the fact i actually suggested that they still play a giant stadium in that they suffer did their stadium from my from the giant state now now they come out with the giants so the jets got a little more credibility in the giants became a little more pathetic but they can spend it and just that what they're doing as a very green thing to do with great for the environment but considering the jets there others are green i still think that they come out on top so well what you say about that i miss again last night where peyton beat the shit out of his little brother like all big brother should do i ever tell you that if you have a younger brother at no point in your life can you ever lose to him in anything ever now i know you can get a better fucking job mary

hotter woman fuck it fuck it happened but i'm talkin about shit that really counts like sports rights sling and are in a real fight you can never king loose for even if he beat you want to fight what you do is you just turn that into around and as you let yourself you grab something to beat him over the head with and then you went round to i know the ladys out there probably don't understand that but anybody with the younger brother i'm telling you i never lost to any of us younger brothers i am undefeated in fights undefeated and if i said that right now considering were all about the same size i would have a couple of fights of my card but hopefully no one in my family listen to this let's get out of the youtube videos for the week i write sons of bitches all of these

elbow on the import gas dot com you can watch right neuro alright this is one of my favor videos i've seen in a wild called macho salad it may seem joe chose salad and this is just a great piece of acting from what movie this is i believe they speaking german i can't fucker remember but this guy wants to get laid and is is girl tells them she's not the mood is one of think from the dialogue and tell him to go make a salad the son of a bitch makes a fuckin salad its awesome it's just i guess it's one of those things latona how many takes this guy had to do but it's it's the shit and i aspire to some day be able to do something like that acting aright the next thing we got here that this this video actually made me upset you ever what youtube video and you wish that you could just somehow step into

screen and fucking into the video and just basically inflict your view of what the justice should have been now well ok watch this video it's actually a clip from the doktor phil show you know that crooked cop do pretends he's a psychologist but he's really just a fuckin therapists who wanted to have groupies so it gets pussy on the side and realized tat he wasn't gonna get in a fucking therapy room oh you like i know i'll do a tv show a obvious shit slowly anyways let's continue he has a clip on there is the name of this video is called fat kid slap mom em you am i right and just to set this one up this is

basically obviously a mother who can't control her kid he's a fat kid is about eleven or twelve his voice hasn't changed yet again he's sitting there sitting there across him his mother whose also sitting down and nos two knows they are having discussion and kid is taking his mother to task in opting her and then she gives him shit for interrupting her he goes by that feel how does that to how do you like it like completely out of fuckin control and this kid's got temporary so fuckin out of line in an she starts given him shit and out of nowhere just halls off it since lapse her like a goddamn pimp you're leaving what nor is why wasn't a pip slap because it wasn't a backhand but it the same fuckin it sounded like a flare chop writer can cheek and this his paws and i'm like oh my god she is

beyond him like a mountain lion and i went to see the bomb my guide jumping in train pull her off clawing the eyes out of this kid fuckin head this pause and then the kid just goes how does it feel how do you like it and the mother does absolutely nothing and i swear to god i was just like i like stand up and like walk around do like little circles you know when you want to walk away from the video but you have to watch it again so you did do those little fucking figure rates i was like you got it you gotta be fucking kidding me why aren't you fucking chillun that kid right now right you know what i would have done if i was that if i were said i i just wanted to sir i shrilly i'm scared my dog over their sorry dude sorry about that right would just now thing overhear everything's goodman everything's

clear oh really oh sorry what does it take to make a dogs can work its tail who takes literally two seconds anyways i just looked at dead video and i was i mean we just imagine being married to that woman and then that was my son and i was i gotta tell you right now if when i marry nea and we have kids and do all that shit if one of our kids ever slaps in the face i will i water air i wouldn't fuckin throat i wanna choked slam their kid through the fuckin coffee table with any luck it would be one of those old school anti coffee tables you know that were made out of the really good would from deepen the fuckin forest not

i kinda shit that explodes like a fuckin stunt table you know and i would just put mother fucker right through it and then i would follow up by his goddamn lyrics and then right through the fuckin dry walk right my hand would be disappearing into the wall like i just fisted a fuckin horse and you would be wondering where that kid was pull them out have all that fuckin plaster and his hair and each to cry and then i would just fuckin take away three quarters of his oxygen and i would whispered in his ear real calmly like one of them bad guys in those great eighties movies with miss gibson where once get em tied up or i can still loner whatever all the fuckin the goose

would get tied up and then that that the real that the head bad guys run in ship which has come in all relaxed with his fuckin dress shoes and suit it would just come up and sort of put his face like parallel the other do face you know just come any just whispered right the guys here listen calmly that's what i will do as it kid was struggling to breathe i just put my fuckin head right next to his ear and i will just be like if you ever slap your mother in the face again i was fucking kill you you wanna stand me do you understand the only reason why you know dead right now is because i haven't figured out how to get away with it yet i beseech shit like that and then you upstairs and you got your fuckin roma even

get her over the next month i swear to god i'll grab you by your fuckin baby fat in the top of your fucking head and i will throw you upside down through the fuckin bay window you understand that you set out there in the rain picking the glass in the woods shards your body i'm gonna take a tray of hot macaroni and throw it read on your fuckin face that's what i'm gonna do you ever fuckin touch her mother was a little too violent was it will i don't give a fuck that's how i came up you i grew up if i if i were actually the reason why fact that woman to claw their kids eyes because that's what my mom what i've done my mom did not need a father figure around the goddamn house basically if if that woman was my mother the only

the dad would have would be at some point to pull the mom off that kid in order two fuckin save my mother would it just grab the nearest she would have fuck off school bob's they they ve drew blood they would like and they just fuckin jesus doug their nails india they gradually really weird places they would just go like i hansel and neck somehow have your juggler in there and they do and then the other hand like this fund would somehow get into this party armpit you didn't even know existed and they would just take chunk of flesh out of that summit be no holes in your fuckin t shirt and they would just which was unbelievable like a fuckin siphoned movie when you were done and you fucker went upstairs and your skin was just burning from wherever the fuck they claude you when you took it looks like it i like you got attacked by a bobcat

today those moms exist anymore we don't know date i think there's been an over correction and whatever my brother said that i kicked him in the face which was bullshit i kicked him stomach would considered legal and working it out amongst yourselves mother was brushing your hair she was late for work she had she had to go with frontier justice she didn't have to from my side of the story she turn around and she went to smash this thing over my head like a fuckin gavel so i did basically i did this defensive move where i ducked but not like a man i didn't do like the boxing like and come up and under and that fuckin with the right hook i didn't do that shit what i basically did was i immediately did fuckin one eighty so now i wasn't facing my mother my shoulders up to my ears i and over slightly out of forty five degree angle

for some reason i my arms go a little my elbows go a little pass my back and ice aye aye squinted idle like parasol before it right before he decides to go to the rack anticipate the file and luckily docked enough she missed my head and just hit right in the back like i took one of those holding chairs and rustling from pat patterson right to my fuckin back and i down at a goddamn heap in landed on that case fuckin bath matt the shock of the plastic brushes landed all around me the enormous mothers bit concern was was that sheep good brush you know and it was old school back moon you didn't have flat screen tvs and when you're broke a brush if they the rubber part with the bristle still existed she continue using it and she did for years she just rather than having a handle it

in calling it like five brush it like barbie she does held it in her hand i can always brush his black eyes use when they try to get waves in their hair that's what it looks like cap using that and every time i saw it i was reminded of that it was like a week later that the two of us just started laughing about it like me when you gonna buy new brush and she's what s wrong with this one what did it doesnt fucking to three quarters of it doesn't even exist anymore it isn't it a fuckin reminder that you smashed the rest of it over over what are your kids backs now shooting give a fuck and she should not she was right she was right that was thing about that's it that's all parenting used to be the mom used to kick the shit out of you and dad didn't have to kick the shit out of you all you do is go and you fuckin he'd yourself a little bit and that was it just what i got out of equipment let's just bad parity in their kid should never got it that was my

directive would have been stuffed upside down in a fuckin hamper and slid down a flight of fuckin stairs about that your point now how does it feel right given willows asked chickens where you you'll end up with one shoe on i see you a bit about that stage of ever fuck i might have to bring i went back speaking about first question eyes do a bit about any time you get beat up by five m people always lose issue you know to help it was that like you get your ass kicking you ask when this like debris of you afterwards and you have to collect your personal be belongings fuck ever had a helluva go somewhere tat was something about having a deca cards headed deca gives you the jacket diamonds i just you it was just that i came about a fuckin went but anyways

so if you want to see what old school parenting looks like it but in a funny your way there's another you to clip watch this this clip it's called spoiled kid gets yell dad yeah the guy yelling in this is basically my dad i write is the funny version of it of he really had to do and totally in the right when he did it i don't have any that's my thing you know what the old sky parenting you know it bother as a kid but when i look back on it now it's like i deserved so many ass kings so many fuck asking i deserved a fuckin deserve to attend roy brothers piss me off and i took a garden house started sprang it through the fuckin i was so max out of water the plants

he was making fun of me and i just took this thing and i fuckin i just i just i had a temper i just sprayed right out into the house you know that was a day i learned what dirt taste light my mother we had meat was on my back just pushing its into the mud i was those were the days and then all you're the siblings would stand around laughing other couldn't hear the laughter over the rage she rose focus on the one part would just laughing and then you there will be a mud covered fair trial nobody just lapse just should i used to see em back in the day embassy one by one of my friends off to his mother i went over to his house to get some lunch anymore after his mom

i wanted to see wanted dessert or something and she was a sight now it's lunchtime you don't get any dessert any discuss our mom i hate you like with little kids and the kid dad did not even look up from his sandwich just took off the kids whole glass of milk and just through it so my friend you start crying right the dead goes back the sandwich and then the mother just got up right on cue went over it just clean it up and that was and i can guarantee you kid never said oh mamma i hate you again this whole fuckin time out shit i know it's a happy bit but i we believe it i really believe that you know you got it slap em around you gotta got it you ok you really hermitage but lily abusing their began gonna throw a glass of milk in their face you gotta what you gotta basically

ruin one of their shirts and by that i mean grab them by the front of it and leave them up by it to the point where all their body weight is on the neck of the shirt in rips a little bit and leaves that red mark that goes past your fuckin collar bone daddy stardom our generation kids listen this to have no idea what i'm talking about but anybody remotely my age is punching the dashboard right now laughing remembering all of this shit did it make us better people i don't fucking know but we shut the fuck up at dinner all right let's continue question bill would you ever consider hosting a late night talk show i would i think i would love to do that i would love to do that provide i could do my monologue like my stand up and i could really just sort of do what i do when a cleaner cleaner

i guess i would love to do that and think i could actually have some really interesting questions and i'm not gonna give away what the fuck and questions i'm talkin little shit golan rex rhiannon you here go rex right on you hear me i would love i would love doing that but i'd my career has not gone down that direction that's like a whole thing where i think you have to decide you wanna be a broadcaster like john stewart like early on like i'm over here and like he just this phenomenon comedian and then he just really early on starting going down that road of being broadcaster and you get seen as that so i don't know who knows say no if they gave me the opportunity to which we can take it in a second i would take it fuckin second right here

advice are right but put up a bitter pill let me pay me this picture for a moment i speak with girls i was always a nice guy that gets you nowhere oh jesus exactly girls always said i was really nice but they were never interested this because i lack confidence in wasn't sure of myself they go this guy taken responsibility for himself exactly yet so ass time went on i got a few project girls in my conference inevitably grow and i started doing well there you go right air all you youngsters young guys out there nice guys trying to get fuckin lay there it is that's page one right there you're a nice guy you're fuckin boring right you gotta be a little bit of a deck right near is you walk try to respect the podcast how much look at you i you see it on your face right now that she's doing that class a girl thing where she's trying not to smile and she's roland fucking eyes and you know it you gotta be

little bit of a cocky asshole it cannot be got and seldom a little bit do like if i saw you right now even though i like your outfit i would walk up to you be like what are you would you come straight from work that's how you do it when you come out why i'm just fuckin with you what are you drinking out of the gate come right out put your balls right on the fuckin table take look at him sweetie i'm just trying to crochet up now we got a charm do what should i do i don't like your fuckin sandals i don't like it i've been meaning to tell you now that was a good one right the fuckin like beat it see that she gave me the finger ass she walked up see right death that the little ebb and flow you have to have a new relationship so if you're always complementing and you dont women alike there like dogs right

this is a record for me i've got forty six minutes without trashing women the other like dogs it really as much as they try to say we like dogs people are just like fuckin dogs you can't reward them all the goddamn time stroke in the back of their goddamn head next thing you know this shit on the rug we want y gotta give a little discipline tell him you know like what their wear it anyways so here guy he figured it out why am i not getting late i dont have confidence so what i want do i need to go out there and get some at that's that's what you do you go out there and used talk in some shit and you a bomb and you're gonna embarrass yourself but eventually you gonna pushed through and i times you embarrassed yourself that just did just gonna become there's gonna be just be funny story to tell the house do i have a funny one i'm gonna just to try to go to dance clubs which totally weren't my saint cause not only was i not good looking enough to be in there i didn't

dance and couldn't dance and i would just walk up to girls in my opening line was i would yell do you wanna dance and then they would go no walk away and it would take me at least another forty minutes if i did to get the courage to another one and that's the thing you broad still fuckin appreciate what are you gonna do you got to sit there and plucky who was and pick the right fucking colored thong make sure that is your bra you get to do that pride we gotta sit there and basically it's do we stand up the only way to learn how to do as you have to go on stage just eat your balls you got a bomb i don't i guess it i'll get made up because they get pregnant they got to deal with that fuckin shit and forget about the in a pregnancy can you imagine another thing growing inside of you choose

i will go to the doktor b i get this out of me is this virus can it's it's eating my gun no no no that's what supposed to have again it out get it out all right this continued so ass time went on and i realise how ignorant all that's that was right ladies ladys its ladies night today ladies day morning on the monday morning podcast i should have a lady's morning should lie a ladies night on the monday morning podcast you know then i'll play cliffs i should do that be uttering you while i fucking just trash you in my own round about country way that's what i'll do i'll just play all right i'm back i just read on a battery power god damn it i was on a nice role there

they see editing difficult i apologize every body the fuck happened you know it's funny to is i went and i bought a whole bunch of these double aid batteries you know me we need more javelin batteries he by gambling battery so i'm always use em right so i gotta the god damn see vs by like this big fuckin twelve pack of em of doubling batteries i go up packages like one left fuckin i did fuck and women no matter what you by it's not enough it's never of friday's go take a battery some goddamn thing that she owns now not a vibrator just fuckin filthy assholes sexually baby modernist we can watch the dog and here which create training the mother fucker

so we sit here and watch this why we couldn't just use our laptops and skype did you know said the signal up to the fuckin satellite whatever let's get back on track here i swear to god but the twenty four pact there was still only be one left replace the batteries and everything just in case why is it illegal to slap you ok let's play that saw me i would never do that ok ladys let's relax our rights what's was plough ahead you will make let me get through the advice here so i can watch them one in football which you guys are probably already doing so anyway so this guy here so ass time went on i gotta conference i started doing well i reserve the right always you see i didn't come cocky a start acting like i'm god's gift to women because i know not that mentality and its for decades so anyway this guy's been through considerable amato women and trying to paraphrase here because this is a really long email he adds up

meeting this girl everything go and great these have been a good what thereafter sometimes guys from ireland says after some time blowjobs insects altogether had started to diminish item france's you were a ton of information are basically meets this girl everything's going great that basically drinking fuckin and everything's often starts taper enough so so tapering off and she started to use sex as a weapon she would play mental games with me ended and i'd end up feeling like a bastard when she shoot me down for sex i'd say that's cool i don't mind than i excuse myself go to the bathroom and crack one out there go sir that's what you do when you get to that fuckin kevin spacey beautiful mine level rub one out right in front of a never

i've done that but i think that that's us up anyways egos so anyway i still voted through the barrel but she wasn't involved and when i try to talk to work calmly about what she was see what you thinking how is she was feeling it would never go well she would turn on the waterworks and play the victim even though she was the one who instigated the mind fucking not sure what i reject objective was because the costs of emotional blackmail is a foreign concept to me might always try to approach everything with a rational wonders understand basis so that she wouldn't feel targeted or threatened i should also add that it took a lot for me to sit down calmly and talk while accepting credit doesn't from her as very direct and often angry fella well that's the only red flag there other than that you seem like you take your shit

and you give it his wealth i gotta watch younger do trust me i can speak volumes of that i'm not the best guy in the world so you can imagine how difficult it was the puncher in our current face okay this is getting a little uglier ass soon ass she started crying as i crying is schoolyard scapegoat for girls to get what they want because they knew men don't not handle it all right out i'm with you everything right up to their sometimes women do cry because their upset they do have access to that emotion more than we do and i know but i know that angry feeling you have we you're like this is you have to gauge that is basically if they cry every time then you can call bullshit but if they only cry once and blue moon then you have to realise that you ve really upset them yeah then you just gotta deal with that that fuckin awkwardness of not knowing what to do and then

i feel like a bully but there's thing worse i will agree with you that if your right and you done anything wrong and then they start crying and then you know he can be a dick in that moment but you get that doesn't mean you have just cause they're crying doesn't mean you have to apologise if you working right you don't have to apologize but there is that thing worry if you make a female cry made if any sort of a guy it's very difficult to stand there be like what i don't give a fuck you guy crisis more like you that guy and now the great santini he gonna shit a few start bautzen a basketball off the back of the head can't be that guy our rights plough ahead here ways females we wanna chime in their ladies what's the deal with the crisis what percentage of it is bullshit can i get an honest fuckin woman out there i mean

god knows guys we have our techniques to get out a shit they're fucking pathetic and you see right through them all right now you like why are you just rubbing their fuckin must right now because that's a strategy to win argument you just keep feeding their fuckin eager has a lot of women out there who really believe that guy's a so fuckin dumb that day get anything passed him and that's a great place for them to continue existing as far as i'm concerned oh yeah yeah i know you can get anything by you you're just fuckin feared the fuckin goddamn world police with now you have vagina you fuck you know everything i kick anything by you you are all powerful bowed down in front of the you don't use funny about that at any magazine out there can just your fashion magazine can just tap into their fuckin in securities and get them to buy the dumbest stupid it's fuckin war paid to put on their fucking face because

emaciated oh no mean not pigeon told fuckin drugged up to is where in it but you you can't get any they passed a minute that's great my voices cracked right there kick away they pass them i'm sorry i'm actually getting over a cold you haven't if you can't tell how did you get the called was it from travelling the country doing all that press no it isn't because i played a game of football the fuckin rain and street closed before monday night football less i'm sorry i was apt up let's plough ahead so basically this guy deals with there for the next two fuckin months and they find it's up just saying he woke up one day and said get your shit out of my flat this is over i can't deal with these my game so what do i get to it question here anyways i don't have much of an ego i like to

set my fault you know dude you said that one too many times for i'm starting to think maybe adieu and maybe this woman is buried in a new fuckin turnip garden in your backyard elective sent me false and amid what i've done is wrong and learn from it so it's not make the same mistakes over and over again my question is bill how i get them to fight up and stop testing my patience how do i need someone who doesn't want to control me with their bullshit epps i don't know dude i half of this i'm really gone with you when you seem like an introspective person and the other half pick your word of this kind of like a psycho how do you get to fuck up and stop testing your pay like testing your patience s kind of like a i pictured dick cheney type guy says like that what the fuck do i know basically i don't know what your problem is in the female ok you dated a girl she said

playing my gaze with you and all it was was after two months you like fuck this pack up here get out of my life so we want thing if he was still in the relationship that i would say that you have problems but you don't you were you met a cycle so what i would say is we are not just stay single stay single right now and wait you find someone who doesn't try to mine the problem is you like a younger guy and the problem is is what you're learning is that the crazy girls they there really down for anything when it comes to sex and that's really hard to resist in your twenties so what i would say in the future when you meet a girl like that is not to get involved in a fucking relationship but you know back on

you know get your stories outcasts it will prevent you from having a mid life crisis later on in life my help you out i don't know i mean i'm kind of giving you shit here but i am also were i'm trying really dawn right here is your basically bearing the brunt of the fact that i've trashed women so much less ten minutes i have to try to seem like unbalanced here and then i don't understand exactly what the fuck is saying but i think i think you're fine she tried to play that my game with you you didn't lose your shit you set according to you anyway you set a fine you went in europe one out your bank for two fuckin and one day you like what am i doing and you just said yeah pack up he should get out of here so i would not this man is not a good example of a good woman right sudden don't act like all women are like this like i have for a long time and like

do every week on my part has just for comedic purposes i like trash adam it's fun and its childish but they're not all like that the young the still great girls out there go out go find him and i don't know make a list of what you're looking for and then you also have to realise do that you know everybody is gonna come with their faults like you with your temper you know you got your faults so ago can i help you out i probably didn't it probably didn't help that i fuckin paraphrased you fuckin email and then i also were lost batteries here in my yeah my goddamn recorder make an end with that with a whimper because when you quick revenge story sure we all do a bill i'm not much for shit jokes but i thought you might be interested in one of my revenge stories when i was in high school there was this kid was always giving me in

friendship so we decided no eight i just read that right when i was in high school there was a kid who is giving my friend deny shit so decided we give him some look about what we worded shit joke foreshadowing going on there perfect model words the reader was a little bit better there weren't gonna laugh so anyway he goes the guy who would not people's lunch trays out of their hands in school at high five as bodies and laugh so is basically like that kid who was in the reply in the karate kid whenever there actors name is who played that dude all the time he was in back to school he was to go to dick and movies anyway he was a guy would not leave her my friend and i were known as the punk or skater kids which i always thought was funny since we were just normal kids who happen play music and what occasionally skateboard for transportation yeah

skater kids you think that it was just a football player i'm sure you maybe he liked cooking also you don't want to was club we stereotype at that age at which of kids sorry keep losing my place here ah anyway this asshole who will call kent try and start fight what's fights with us and halls and would have his minions come up and pushes from behind and run away nice to see nothing has changed in high school we honestly didn't give a shit about those kids a week more ignored them most of the time sub text we're bigger than us and we didn't feel like getting our asses kicked before we the day came can't came up this where they can't take it no more i like this finally they came up can't came up my friend in the parking lot grand escape poured out of his head through on the ground and stuck his chin out saying hit me come on you

fucking faggot hit me was this kid real was he reading from a bad coming of age script mind you my friend has never set a fuckin word this prick so i go yeah guy fuck em then says to me you don't even wanna fuck and try a fucking kick punk ass jesus this is right out of a bully handbook me being but my friend being smart ass said my punk ass or my sky ass in person proceeded to scotch dance around can't it was one funniest things i've ever seen what scarred dancing is is that the move in that moment dennis are you to reinvent the personal computer is this what is what i see in your future anyways continuing with this year that night we went to taco bell to get some food and decided to take revenge we took our

go back into the bathroom and looked it took one of the most satisfying sheets of our lives so you guys sitting indifferent stall snickering at the sound of your own shit hitting a plastic bag there's a lot of letters to this this movie here scott the classic bully scott the two nerds their bonding so you're gonna scare the into it with a little scar dancing you got a few if you write a treatment you could probably get it made in this weird economy out here in hollywood artless how to get ploughing had he around we put the bags of shit in the trunk of my car please tell me you double backed drove over two and at this point this kid so into the story he actually rights this kid's real name but will still of kids we emptied emptied the bags of shit into his mail box while trying to throw up from the smell the combination of our shit made a slurry it was

looking out of the sides of the mailbox jesus christ spit out of a neighbourhood but didn't get too far because we both laughing so fuckin hanukkah brayley keep the vehicle on the road the next week school i heard some kids talking about what happened to catch me box i couldn't help it smile time someone mentioned it from then on cancer nickname at school was shit box my hope you enjoyed my disgusting story but i am not usually one for revenge or shit jokes but this asshole deserved it i love that i guess i'll write well there you gulf that's what where'd what's he supposed to do we care kick the shit out of him so he shifted a bag with his friend and they dump it in mailbox there you go we're gonna end on that we're gonna end on that the dungeons and dragon revenge story

i may well what happened did you ever find out why that is unsatisfied to me did can't go out there and reach for his bully magazine and got a handful of via combined shit from two of you poor mob you know where to carry that bali around and is in a warm for now months i don't know what to do with that i got off thrown off with my fuckin the whole thing the goddamn tape quarter crap allowed our many ways that supply cast for this week ended on a whim rather than a roar fixed anybody who listen to the unemployed cast and many more podcast leaks go to the immense podcast outcome please by my new special go on dvd by a couple of em support god bless you if you want the oh jesus ringtone if you can't afford a dvd i fuckin understand that it's a crazy economy right now

just go to the unemployed cast dot com

four hundred and ninety nine said she can get the og is ringtone and if you can't afford to come back next week if you have another free podcast all right once again thanks everybody would help me try to bite my special and i'm going to go watch the saints forty three