I'm over Winfrey, welcome to supersede conversations the pod cast I believe that one of the most valuable gives you can give yourself is time taking time to be more fully present. Your journey to become more inspired and connected to the deeper world around us starts right now. Our taxpayers. But three unexpected words together and then those three change the way, millions of other women and people thought about themselves, crazy, sexy And Sir she's irreverent injuries, aggressive and energies, vulnerable and she's, an absolute gay, changer instead of sitting Omen cry. He stood up and she took back her life Chris cars here to teachers, how to have a crazy sexy,

wow, hey everybody! Thank you. Thank you. So much. Thank you. So I have a question for you. What does it mean to live a crazy sexy life? Crazy is unique, different. The celebration of what makes you different

c is informed, empowered standing in your power and helping other people do the same and life. You know this she's, our great teacher and that teacher will give you obstacles and opportunities, and it's how we deal with these obstacles and opportunities that determine our success and our resilience living Easy sexy life is about living like you really mean it, it's about saying yes and showing up for your life. Now I teach a lot of ways to do that, but today we're going to focus on two so taking care of yourself and accepting yourself in all your glory.

But before I begin, I wanna make something clear: I didn't used to live a crazy sexy life. In fact, there was a time when I was a steaming hot mess steaming like a pile of steaming, hot madness until a whole, leash chisel can't swear today, wake up call chain. Everything on February, fourteen two thousand and three, I remember writing in my journal happy Valentine's day. You have cancer, a rare and incurable stage for sarcoma, which is a type of cancer, now. I haven't been feeling well for a while, but I was only thirty one and I didn't take it seriously, but after a bit it was getting really hard to walk and stand and breathe. So I

to my doctor, I told them what was going on these said all right. Let's, let's take a look under the hood. Soon also sounds. He was was shaken well, that ultrasound revealed that I had tumors all over my liver, and he said that I had so many tumors that my liver look like swiss cheese, more tests, including full body, scan and a biopsy. That's when I learned that those tumors that started in my liver had spread too, My lungs and I was diagnosed with what's known as epithet. Lloyd Demand, GEO, Endo Theo, my so many syllable. So little time I mean it's me for I attempted to say, let alone spell it right. So I needed to get unknown colleges immediately now. The first guy that I spoke spoke to suggested a triple organ transplant right.

I did not know much about medicine at the time, but I knew that that was a very silly idea like thank you, but no thank you. I am leaving with what I came with. We are good we're good here today. The next one kept me waiting two hours and gave me ten years to live, and I thought this guy has a crappy sense of timing And that is when I became the ceo of my house, the lady boss. I would air, and I would fire- and I would build the best team for my new company- save my ass technologies in court

created and that he would consist of along colleges, two new the most about my disease and also had his finger on the pulse of any new research, as well as integrated practitioners. Who could look at my whole body, not just the cancer and figure out how to help of Chris boost all of Chris. I remember when I finally found my oncologists, my second in command. He taught me everything about my disease. He said here's the thing. Sometimes it can be slow moving and that's what we hope you have. Sometimes it can be aggressive. That's what we hope you don't have.

Unfortunately, sometimes it can start slow, moving and then add a nowhere, become aggressive like a ticking time bomb. We just don't know so. Here's what I think we should do Chris. I think we should just watch and wait, do nothing and track you what no? No! No! No! No! No! No! No! I don't want cancer in my body. I want this cancer out of my body. I know you do. I know you do, but there's too many tumors. We can't do surgery and, unfortunately, right now we don't have a cure. So again we're gonna watch and wait. If you agree track you, let cancer make the first move, but this is what you are going to do. My dear, you are going

watch and live. You are going to get busy living and you're going to take care of yourself watching weight, watch a live, take care of myself. I know how to do any of that so easy before cancer. Okay, back it up, I was an actress and a photographer and a very talented cocktail. Waitress. My idea of self care was do whatever you need to do to not look old. Ok, don't look old that self care. Am I die? It was based around what ye to stay slim for my job, not what to eat to nourish my bodied nourish my mind, nourish my dreams,

And, as a result, I was constantly dieting constantly trying to shrink myself. Am I alone? Am I was constantly dieting and constantly trying to shrink myself. I developed an unhealthy relationship to food loved sugar, Ah I scream more specifically now my eyes grew ice cream was my friend. Maybe they're sitting there eating my ice cream, hello friend. How are you you taste so good? and every once in a while. I'd have a mindful moment- and I think you know what you really should eat all the ice cream, because

Didn't do anything in moderation. I need to have all the ice cream everyday, a pint of ice cream. You relation all the ice cream. Ok, I can do that. Ok thrown up now could eat that. I screamed no, but you know what you can do you know what you couldn't do you can go in the garbage, call out the ice cream and just dusted off and keep eating your eyes game friend we're back on track. Are you doing you still tasting really good, but then I'd have another mindful moment and I think doubt do doubt. Member you're not supposed to each other

a scream, that's not healthy for you right! So I'd like a cigarette it like a cigarette. I take a couple of drags and by the way back then I wasn't really a smoker cause. I'd never bought my own pack. Now you're, not a smoker of you. Don't buy your own tat right, just bombing cigarettes so take couple drags and then I pointed out in the ice cream trying to destroy the ice cream, knocking. You no more and I throw it out, we're good, but you know what you can do you know what you can do if you are crazy, sexy dirty. Like me, you can get a knack of it and you can

not bad, no dig around. You got that I speak and you can pull it out and you could scoop out the cigarette out the ass and you can just keep eating your ice cream dummy. Finally, I figured out how to stop eating all the ice cream you grab a bottle of wind acts and yet napalm the crap out of it. I'm not in that. No! No we're done see. I told you, I was a hot steaming mess back in the day, so back to that watch in weight, watch and live moment. If I couldn't be cured, could I still be healthy. Could I participate in my wellness instead of participating in my illness. Yes, I could. Could I choose love over fear,

loving my body and loving my life. Instead of fearing my body and fearing my life now, here's the thing about fear. It can be very useful right. It gets us to the hospital when we're feeling sick. It tells us don't go down that dangerous road, but fear cannot be caught Your fact fear can inform you but not define you fear, can awaken but not cripple you. So thankfully, I've been doing my best every day. The keep choosing love next. Stop on the train. Whole foods market Ha paycheck market grab the groceries part just

put down the of anything, but tell me just put it in their looks, help me get it get it back. Let's healthy, that's gonna, get it go to the protests, get it get all that produce. I don't know how to make it. I dont like vegetables. I don't know that contain. Forget it good for you and I remember the first time the eyes Caille. I didn't know what was going to kill me. First, the cat or that we now this is back in two thousand and three guys. This is long before Caille had publicist. Caille has a very powerful Hollywood publicist today. Care is cool girl in the produce, I'll all the bloggers blogging about Hell Caille, tee shirts piecing cow bags. Girl was

cool Baghdad. No tail was just scary, scary, Caille, but over time I start to love I sort of love, my vegetables. I started to love cooking and what taking care of myself, I became a student of health, and this is what I learned. Prevention is the best cure. Prevention is the best, now that doesn't mean that there are certain diseases that have genetic components, but more often than not. Our genes are not our destiny. How we care for ourselves matters. So I developed what I call the five pillars of prevention and they stem from what work eating what were drinking, what we're thinking, how we're resting and how renewing eating real food back to nature back to the garden.

If it's a made in a lab, it takes a lab to digest. If it has a shelf life. Long but then you don't need that shit up drinking real food, that's tooth hydrate in your body with water, so does not real food. I was shocked to learn that. But we're thinking dialing down the stress, how we're resting sleeping, but also giving our minds, mental breaks throughout the course of the day, our renewing moving our bodies through space and time in a way that you love you, don't love going to the gem, do not go to the gym kitchen dance on dance Have fun, follow your wonder, follow you whimsie, so I started to practice these five pillars and guess what happened. I began to feel better. Even with cancer,

ok and then I certainly share what I was doing with other people through my blog in my books and they started to feel better win win. But I have to be honest with you, because this is Super soul sessions. I was still struggling. Deep down, I was struggling with what was going on in my mind. I still wanted to be cured. I wanted to be cured really badly desperately and this next week that I'm their share with, you is very embarrassing for me to tell you sometimes p come up to me and they would thank me and they would say your work has made such an impact. Thank you for writing your books. Thank you, because not only do I feel better, but I got better and I would be so happy. Like genuinely happy, but I was also jealous.

Because underneath it all, I felt broken so around this time at all culminated in my tenure cancer versus three, which is the anniversary of my diagnosis, and if you remember that second guy, he totally freaked me out, he said you may only have ten years to live so that playing in my mind and whenever I freaked out, I go to the woods go hiking, so I live in the Catskill mountains in upstate, New York, and I have these really beautiful trails behind my house and that's why I figure out all my stuff to go there, one on side, I'm scared ago there when I'm happy and I get to see all my friends are my friends. Are there the squirrels chipmunks,

say: hi to your mom. For me, but dear everybody, said we have a great time, but on this particular day I don't see any of that, because I am playing a movie in my mind and in that movie I am dead, in terms of endearment, I am Deborah Wing or in terms of environment and I'm lying on my hospital bed, I'm dying of cancer, and I'm saying goodbye to my two precious boys, my beautiful sons and I'm saying goodbye to my mother. Surely Maclean you now we ve had this very tumultuous relationship has been hard to heal the mother daughter stuff, but we did guys you get where I'm coming from here I don't I've signs? I have dogs, my mother is a very big personality, but she is and surely Maclean, but it is a man or cause I'm working myself into a lather when Adam nowhere from the sky

comes hurtling down towards me. This big, bright fat, yellow, beautiful bumblebee, who smacks me on my third. I awakened me to the present, falls to his death, sacrificing his life for my wisdom so kind. I start to laugh funny and I start to cry. I think, oh gosh, what if I live a long beautiful life, a healthy life. With cancer, but instead of making rich memories. Now I just think I wish I was somebody else I wish I could the girl who didn't have cancer, and that's when I learned

power of unconditional acceptance, excepting yourself, is about giving up or settling growing in the tower. Now, setting yourself as about having your own back and never Bandinage yourself, excepting yourself, isn't about amputating your ambition, it's about owning yourself worth, excepting yourself is about respecting yourself. It's about honouring who you are right now today in this moment, just who you could become somewhere down the line when we create a mythical, better version of ourselves We all want to do better. We want to be better, we want to feel better and we can, but when we seek from a place of lack or deficiency or feeling You know what I'm just not enough. We create.

Suffering in our lives when we seek from a place of wholeness of knowing that I am already a bad ass already. I just want to create some more. Ass, a ray of my life, that's when we grow in a sustainable way. You are not broken. Not one of you in this room, you're not broken. I am not broken, we don't need fixing. We need loving. isn't that a relief. It feels good to know that it's leave. You are already enough. But people ask me how I am today here goes.

I am living my crazy sexy big bright life with cancer. I may not be cured, but I am healthy and I am healing you know caring takes place in the physical body healing takes place. In this spirit, I used to call myself a cancer thrive survivor rather, but that confused people colluding me. Because they not, I went intermission now. I call myself a cancer thrivers life is a terminal In addition, we are all gonna die right,

How many of us are going to truly live? Truly live, give yourself permission to start living, you're, crazy, sexy life, give yourself permission to say: yes, give yourself permission to show up, give yourself permission to take care of yourself to accept yourself in all your glory. Give yours permission to live like you really really mean it. Thank you so so much thank you crazy! I'm Ober Wintry an you been listening to supersede conversations

cast. You can follow superficial on Instagram, twitter and Facebook. If you haven't yet go to apple podcast, unsubscribe rate and reviews. This podcast join me next week for another supersede conversation. Thank you for listening.