This is optimal. Living daily episode, eleven sixty two ten simple ways to help you who say? No I corny carver of me the more or less dot com and I'm just a moloch, the guy that reads to everyone the day of the year, including weakens and Holidays hope you live a more meaningful and positive life today, supposed being from Courtney, Carver, author and critter project, three hundred and thirty three before we get to it you're here, because you like listening to blogs while there's a great service and provide something just as awesome. Blinkist takes thousands of now fiction books and breaks down the best key, take a ways and need to know information into fifteen minutes they can read or listen to and right now, for a limited time. Blinking has a special offer just for our audience: go do blink ist dot com, slash old, to start your free seventy trial,

that's a blink IST spelled B. L I and k I s, T bleakest dot, com, slash, loyalty to start your free seven day. Trial link is dot com, slash, o hildy flowers, get right to it as we optimize ten simple ways: help you say no by corny, carver of be more or less star. Come it's important to say. No, three more time to engage in what matters most, even though we may feel bad or worried about saying no mid still important, because we need more time than we think. Not only do we need time to do the usual things but we need time and noticed things and due process thoughts and emotions when he tied to move through the world present and on we in time to just be we need time to remember who we are. We can better serve the world. We have time to respond, thoughtful

instead of reacting mindlessly, we need time to take care of our bodies time to listen to our art? We deserve time. Engage the things that are on our heartless, not only the things to do less things like take a long walk. Do in a notebook. Call someone who makes you laugh my around and put your feet up disconnect from the internet for three days. It takes time to take care of our bodies, brains, hearts, and so All's and if we don't take that time, we can't take care of any one else, at least not for very long continue to serve everyone. But cells will leave us completely depleted and there will be consequences when all your free time and space is dedicated, keeping up catching up, regrouping and making ends meet me. It's not free time. If you are free time, real free time or if you crave, eight whole hours of sleep, proper lunch break, or at least twenty four hours away from your email. You are going to have

I have to say no a lot say. No is no easy feed, especially for kind generous souls for people pleasures for people who are you two saying yes to everything. Yes, all chair the silent auction me s, army for coffee, yes, I'll make a wonderful family dinner. Yes, you can pick my brain. Yes I'll drive you to the airport. Yes, all take thy call, yes I'll make that thing for thy party. Yes, all respond to every notification on my phone. The list goes on and on we ve all said he asked what we wanted to say now, whether we say it out of guilt for fear of missing out or out of it is important to know that saying yes, when your heart says no is a disservice not only to you but Everyone you say yes to. If you says: no, it will fight the yes all the way through you won't be excited contribute. He won't give your best in you.

And of resenting the commitment or the person who asked you to commit another are exceptions to the never say. Yes, when your heart says no rule, my heart doesn't want to go to the dentist every six months, but I do go if you struggle to protect your time, use one or more of these ten simple ways to do you say no number one figure out what matters to you by asking questions. It helps to ask the question how loud put your hands on your heart when you ask, does This really matter to me miss this love is contributor. Into the life. I want to my health or to the way one tree, people and my holding on for the right reasons asked about your stuff about how you feel about your work, about a grudge about imitations, require, everything for your hands on your heart and ask your heart knows things and she will you make room for what matters number to know, you can be grateful and-

peaceful, while saying no Jonathan feels suggests practising the loving no and how to live a good life. Sulphur stories, surprising size and practical wisdom field says to ask yourself: how can I be cool I am respectful, you also stand strong in what I need Oda sound. Like he's just picturing yourselves spending all the time you ve now freedom doing the thing that really matters to you before responding with your now be grateful for the invitation respectful of the time and courage may have taken some one to ask and graceful and loving when you decline, number three keep it short other animal says: no is a company centres expense when you need to, but still keep it short in just a few sentences. You can say no with gratitude. No thank you. I appreciate you See me, but I have another commitment is better than a long experts. Asian about how busy and sorry you are number therefore turn Foma to jump.

Fear of missing out to joy of missing out, is that like you, are missing out on something else, honour the commitments you make to yourself. We decline inevitable, and find joy and how you decide to spend your time instead of wondering what you missed out on fuel joy, that you have a choice and joy, because you operate acting? What matters most number five say: yeah Derek servers, approach to feeling like you're doing too much is this quote: those of you who often over command or feel too scattered, may appreciate a new philosophy on try if I'm not say yeah about something, then say no meaning when deciding whether to commit to something. If I feel anything lesson while thou be amazing, absolutely yeah that my answer is no. When you say no, those things you leave room in your life to really throw yourself completely into that rare thing. There

makes you say: yeah we're all busy with all taken on too much saying yes to less is the way out. End quote number six be clear. Saying things like, let me think, It is often and delay tactic when you know it's a no say no, if you, say yes, but the timing is bad, suggest, another time and be specific number seven read essentialism Greg, Mchugh and author of a centralism. The discipline pursuit of less reminds us quote. Remember that if you dont prioritize your life, someone else will essential. Ism is not about how to get more done. Is about how to get the right things done. End quote this book well below value, evaluate more re, evaluate the priorities in your life. Number eight,

Do your work first! If the first thing you do in the morning is check email, he may never have a chance to decide what is most important to you. Put your oxygen mask on first number: nine! Try! A yes fast is imposed. Over you to say no or to know when to say no or why does a yes try, a yes fast! commitment to say no to every request for thirty days practised a loving, no over and over again Sherry challenge with others, not as a built in excuse, but to inspire them to respect their time and what matters to them to number ten dump the guilt. Of course you will help someone in their time of need so dump the guilt around not baking, cookies attending an event or picking so from the airport at midnight. Believe in yourself. Often, what you know is best for your life and say no to guilt is in the small I'll still moments where you build your strength and resilience seem contributed,

world and more meaningful ways when you say quietly and put your is on your heart. You'll know what matters mouse you just listen to the post titled sensible is to help you say no by corny, carver of being more or less star come. I beg you again to blink IST blinkers taste, the best key take always in condenses non fiction books for you, so you can read or listen to multiple books, even in one day, if you want perfect for you as a listener of this show, blogs are great because they're short and to the point, the ball as books, is that they are wait too long to get one point grass I checked out. Blink is both with books. I've read an haven't read and they really do capture the most important points you feel like you, ve read the book perfect for commute or walk where we listen podcast or read it. If you like, they'll carnies, classic how to win friends and influence people is a grey one worth checking out and right now for a limited.

Time. Blink has a special offer just for our audience: gotta blink, ist dot com, slash old, to start your free seventy trial, that's blinkers spelled b l I an k, I as T blinkers, dot com, slash, oh well, d, to start your free seventy trial, blinkers start com, slash old on that Derek servers, article that she mentioned in this post, actually narrated. It way back in episode. Forty four of this pod gas like three years ago, so I on a lot different, hopefully Amber narrating. Now pretty good ones check that out. If you wanna hear Derek stars on this topic in a really good article again, US episode forty four Hollywood. Therefore, today I hope you have you a great day, have a happy Friday and I'll be back over the weekend or your optimal life awaits