This is optimal. Living daily episode, one thousand two hundred and fifteen, an excerpt from the book, the craving mind from cigarettes to smartphones, to love. Why we get hooked and how we can break bad habits by Judson and I'm just a Moloch wellgood optimal living daily or the o l de pod cast. Where I read to you from some of the best blogs, I can find and get permission from, and actually sometimes books like today, darker brewers, one of the world's top neuroscientist Ty Trust and the director of research and innovation at the mindfulness centre at Brown. University he's alive the authority on how our brains form bad habits and addictions and the specific tools people can use overcome them. You can find a Judson brewer dot com which have led to this episode description before we get to the excerpt. We heard about the revolution in online furniture shopping enjoy bird but behind it all joy, but believes that you should never see but when it comes to your home furnishings and that you should always have the freedom to be boldly original, they have hundreds of styles and options.

From midcentury modern, to contemporary an amazing selection, a fabric choices from leather to velvet, even kid in pet friendly options See how joy birds, revolutionizing online furniture shopping, create the furniture that brings you joy today at joy, bird dot, com, slash old, gotta joy her dark com, slush a d and receiving exe, whose of offer for twenty five percent off your first order by using the code Old House get right to it. Sort of optimizing your life. An exit from the book, the craving mine from cigarettes to smart phones, to love. Why we

hugged and how we can break bad habits, but Judson brewer. Giving feels good for those of us who get fired up when we see injustices in the world's many might feel like righteous anger is a good thing. We may feel that getting up off the couch as we shake our fist at a politician. Giving a speech motivates us to vote watching Youtube videos of police brutality, may motivate us to join and advocacy group, or do some community organizing we may Wonder what would happen if we didn't get angry. We just sit on the couch like a lump on my. Anger meditation retreat, The step, my habit was not helping me get concentrated. I started to become less I did about it disenchanted and as a result, was tat. I had a lot more energy freed up to do. Other things. Why has probably all of us can relate to anger, is exhausting all my retreat. Three purposed energy went to a less distracted, been yes much more concentrated mind as a direction.

Anger died down. I was able to bring the opera conditions together to drop into a very concentrated state, one that state on point for up to an hour. At a time there was a welcome change. What help this one of the factors that I mentioned in the last chapter that is needed for concentration is joy again, not the agitated restless excitement but a joy that felt expansive and tranquil if anger or anticipatory excitement move us in the opposite direction. What types of activities foster joyful stays as some my meditation training. I learn what was described as a three step: graduated teaching- that was of Terawatt Buddhism is, but which, in reality, move to virtuous conduct and then only after those were practiced. One practices: mental development, as in meditation, the insight that tradition and others offers that we go around all day, acting like a jerk he'll, be hard to sit down a meditate. Why pieces

as we try to focus on an object everything those emotionally charged from the day, come marching into our head, making it impossible to concentrate come to the cushion not having lied, cheated or stolen. There is less garbage to take out as Lee browsing ten meditation teacher specializing in concentration practices likes to say if this is the second step, what about the first generosity, whereas it feel like one were generous? It feels good as in an open, joyful state, it is suggested that practicing generosity may help us learn what it feels like to. Let go we're literally letting go when we give a gift to someone else. Yet not our generosity is equal. What happens when we give a gift expecting something in return? does it feel the same when we donate a large sum of money with the expectation that will get some type of recognition. Do we give the same satisfaction when we hold the door? or boss or a day with the intention of impressing her or him in an essay.

I hold no strings attached. The buddhas culture of generosity, tennis, Arabic, who highlighted a passage in the police, can in three factors at exemplified the ideal gift quote the donor before giving. Is glad while giving his or her mind is inspired and after giving is gratified end quote, These are the whole lot like reward based learning the donors glad trigger, while giving her minds inspired behaviour and after giving gratified reward, must break holding the door. The two scenarios we're on our first day with someone and want to make a good impression. We out of our way to hold a door and hoping to get some signal that we're doing a good job reward we might. Like the door holding to garner a thanks or you're so thoughtful, or at least of appreciation? If we don't get that not it doesn't feel so good. We expected something and in get it in particular,

can explain the burn out among those of us who are constantly helping others but return home, exhausted, feeling unappreciated like modern day martyrs. Now, on the other hand, if we truly selflessly held the door, what would we expect absolutely nothing because we were looking for a reward. It would matter whether they think does or not. Yet it was still feel good because the act itself provided an intrinsic reward. Giving feels good, especially when untainted, by an expectation on the back end, no strings it, this may be. What the passage in the polish cannon is pointing to when we selflessly give we don't have to worry about buyers remorse, because we are buying anything this intrinsic. Or leaves us feeling gratified down a memory to do this again next time now there are lots of scientific studies showing the health and wellness benefits of generosity. Is that of describing all the details for you now see might be intellectually convinced? Why don't you

Try the experiment yourself. This is what you can do without an MRI scanner or double blind experimental design. The next time you hold it or for someone see if there's a difference in your felt experience of happiness, joy, warmth, cetera between when you had an expectation for this when he did it selfless, Does this help and learning how to properly read your stress compass? What types of, Wars or an you toward verses away from stress you just listen to an exit from The book the craving mind from cigarettes to smart phones, to love, why we get hooked and how we can break bad habits by just before they get a bird joy but is that you should never subtle when it comes to your home, furnishings than that, you should always have the freedom to be boldly original from idea to reality, the empower you decree the space and furniture that brings you joy. We talk about exploring tourist things on the show. A lot

and this is a rare case where its both with joy bird, yet one of a kind furniture, into your unique taste and ever three hundred and sixty five days home trial, you can skip the furniture store, and bring the shower right to your home? It's hassle free delivery, though even remove all the packing materials. Then you can sit on it, sleep on it and break it in. If you don't love your joy bird return it for a full right check it out. There have hundreds of styles and options every color imaginable with free personal design, consultants, and I love that they have kid and pet friendly upholstery options, see how joy bird is revolutionizing online furniture shopping creed, the furniture that bring- You joy today at joy, bird dot, com, slash old, go to joy burden the calm slush oil d and receive an exclusive offer for twenty five percent off your first order by using the code, oh well

We want to learn more about doktor brewers book. You can find it on his sight at Judson, brewer, dot com, thus linked in this episode, description and old podcast. I come from leave it at that for today. I hope you have a great rest of your day. Thank you for being here. Listening to me and for being a subscriber of the show and I'll be back tomorrow, where you're optimal life awaits.