This is optimal living daily episode, fourteen thirty, six having fun in the pit of despair. Part- and by Steve Avellino of Steve, Pavlovna, dot com and I'm just a moloch. Happy sadder a walk up to one of the only pod gas in the world were blogs or narrated to you for free with permission from Authors then award winning, I cast thanks to you before we get to it a light to tell you about me, juries spelled m e j. You are I changing the narrative. That's existed around fine jewelry for hundreds of years, namely that I enjoy can be yours without the traditional markups. It makes for a great gift a share more about that and some of their beautiful designs later or you can just treat yourself right now. Go to majority dot com, slash old for free shipping on orders over one hundred dollars spelled M e You are I dot com, Sancho, L, Missouri, DOT, com, site old, now jump right into our

most as our optimizing, your life, having fun in the pit of despair, part one by Steve, pebbles, of Steve Pavlovna Darksome may spiritual teachers advocate the principle of detachment, which means being unattached. Tao comes. The reasoning. Is that attacked went. Outcomes creates unnecessary suffering. Life is full of surprises and, if you become overly attached to specific outcomes, you're likely to create extra stress, frustration worry and disappointment for yourself. So why bother with this? Needless suffering, dispassionate detachment is popular idea, especially in Buddhism. It claims help people transcend neediness and clean ass if they practices this principle enough, but for many people is impractical to consistently we apply. This principle, in real life on one level seems

the enemy that people suffer some emotional distress when they become overly attached in clinging to specific outcomes I receive dozens of emails from people asking me how they can capture and secure a specific relationship partner who doesn't reciprocate. Their feelings of us receives a button. Emails from people asking. How can you let go of such cleanness pieces eating them? inside. They really want to stop obsessing. But my own challenging lessons with attachment to deal with, especially in my four several years as an entrepreneur, as has pacific and measurable goals, and I became attached to them. I grew increasingly frustrated when I had to deal with setbacks. I try not to let the setbacks bother me, but they did you want, I didn't you my goals, distress created along the way made the accomplishments field bitter sweet. I tried the buddhist approach and found that it give me some temporary comfort, but the results were inconsistent On the one hand it of lower my stress levels for a short time,

but on the other hand, if I didn't care enough about my goals of a fella, I was using meditation and attachment as justifications for laziness and procrastination. Partisan detachment actually increased. My stressed in the long run because it postponed real growth and progress I felt better when I confronted my challenges head on, regardless of how attached I fell to the outcomes are often experienced queasy feeling in the pit of my stomach, while practicing d such men and they became one more feeling I wanted to transcend detachment had all the tell tale signs of a partial match, so you, there had to be a better approach, or over, I didn't like fuel, so aloof just to Vulcan for me and made me wonder why while the doing anything at all my might as well. Sit around doing nothing. This part is encouraged me to check out of real life into it. Or my goals and ambitions. Why bother helping people? Why bother writing my mother living neither matters anyway,

so maybe we can under a Hindu it onto evangelist stress that any good philosophy should status by our reason as well. The buddhist notion of detachment failed. This test for me it didn't satisfy my reason and it didn't feel intuitively write to me: either exaggerating attachment Eventual solution, and one that has served me well for years, was essentially to do the opposite and set a stepping back into detachment. I stepped further into attachment by adopting a more playful mindset and look for ways. The increase. In exaggerate, the feeling of attachment more weekly on less Vulcan. Does approach has worked beautifully some friends of and stay in, my house for the past few weeks, and we can only play the game carcass on together a competitive strategy game. If our partners, the buddhist version of Detachment game, isn't as fun. If I don't get attached to the outcome, then, what's the point, the degree of food,

depends on how attached the players are to the outcome so set of trying to step back and be detached and objective. I immersed myself in the necessity of victory and the horrible threat of defeat Sundays. I'll, say things like this to my friends as we begin a game, I subscribe to the gold who caught standard of victory, so my goal, just to defeat you. A true victory is to make your enemy see that they were wrong to oppose you in the first place, the forced them to acknowledge your greatness. Occasionally, I quote the princess bride quote your ears: you keep and I'll tell you why so that every shriek of every child, a senior heedlessness, will be yours to cherish every bade that weeps at your approach, every woman who cries out dear God, what is, I think, will echo in your perfect years. That is but to the pain means it means. I. Leave you in anguish, wallowing in freakish, misery forever end quote: you can imagine what effect this has on life

France on the mild side elicits collective grown. Some does a courage isn't gang up against me either way does the stakes of an otherwise mild mannered activity? When I express my attachment to winning my friends become that much more attached to my defeat, this has the effect of making the game or emotional and immersive if one of them, when they relish the wind down much more. But if I win, the more glorious a victory. Suffice it to say that I am not injured. Having both export is an game visas, hurled army. As I see it, this is just my point. As a way of acknowledging that they were wrong to oppose me in the first place, When I lose a game, I don't try to pull back from disappointment. My wallet, I curse. My foul luck Ray analyze, the critical moves and grudging I congratulate the victor, my the defeat, a sting, and I vow vengeance. At the next rematch of course. I know that the outcome of a game of carcasses doesn't actually matter by practices. Kind of overtax meant for two key benefits for

it makes a relatively Monday inexperienced, so much more lively and fun. Second, this practice helps me, have more fun and avoid unnecessary stress when the stakes are higher, to begin then you'd just wasn't part one of the post titled having fun in the pit of despair by sea. Have of Steve Pavlovna our come and as I met before Missouri makes handcrafted, fine jewelry that you can wear every day. They have timeless pieces if you're going for a classic look or fund his eyes. If you're looking for a steam abuses and check out the fair pricing section on their product pages, show you how much will save by avoiding the Traditional market prices? The diamond ring this easily over five hundred dollars and traditional retailers less than two hundred m a jury, but not because our cutting corners, I give it as a gift and got to see the packaging it came with, including a custom know that I was able to write, look really classy are so high.

With it really impressed one of my favorites from their collection, the diamond solo ring they can get for yourself or get with a friend to use as a French, a brain. You all them on Instagram or sign up to view their latest designs or industry yourself right now go too much hurry dot com, slash old for free shipping on orders over one hundred dollars spelled m. Each you are, I dot com, Slash, Welty, Missouri, DOT, com, slash old, they get to see you, ve finished the rest of this post. For you, this one is super inches came to me because I've always heard about detachment and how it can help manage expectations which then helps with unnecessary suffering. Basically, the Buddhist approaches he described but never heard the odds that approach. Some curious, where this will go to Morrow and on that note, I ll leave it at that. Thank you for being here listening everyday, including the weekends and I'll be back tomorrow to finish up this post, where optimal life awaits