Adam M. Lowenstein encourages to ask ourselves whether we're working on self-improvement or self-indulgence.
Episode 1713: Are you working on Self-Improvement or Self-Indulgence? by Adam M. Lowenstein on Finding A Balanced Life
Adam M. Lowenstein is the author of Reframe the Day. He spent eight years working in American government and politics, most recently as a speechwriter and strategic communications advisor in the United States Senate. Today, Adam lives in London with his partner, Erin, and writes frequently about politics, work, and life. Visit his website, see his latest work, and subscribe to his newsletter, “Reframe Your Inbox,” at www.adaml.blog.
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Real, quick if you've been struggling recently with stress and anxiety than the daily shine. Podcast is a show that is here to help this podcast was created by two women of color, who didn't see themselves reflected in the mainstream wellness community and they're on a mission to make caring for your mental and emotional health easier and bring more representation and inclusion into the wellness space, and they also have a free self care app that makes caring for your mental health at Dealey. Have it if the daily Shine podcast sounds like the podcast for you, you can tune it to episodes every weekday, so they never miss a beat, listen now to the daily shine
cast on Spotify or wherever he listened to your favorite podcast. This is optimal, living daily episodes, seventeen thirteen are you work
non self improvement or self indulgence
Bye, aunt, em, Lowenstein of Adam Elder Blog remunerated,
just a moloch, we're gonna, often
living daily, o l d for short old for shorter, where I marry the best
I was, I can get permission from covering productivity, minimalism, personal development
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to today's boast. Ants are off
rising your life,
are you working on self improvement or self in
diligence by Adam M Lowenstein of Adam L, Thou blog quote in a world of stressful lack of control,
raising source of control. We all have is the ability to make the world a better place. One act at a time. Robert aims. Upholstery
from why zebras don't get ulcers green moments of stillness throughout the day
king regularly about death and mortality, resisting MIKE
also to be busy and productive all the time, building awareness practice on a foundation of mindfulness meditation, making more time for the people and activities
care most about fighting Fermo the evidence
He is fear of missing out. These are a few of the practices that have helped.
A build more fulfilling days. These practices Don require me to make raw
go changes in my life, the fact that they integrate with my existing circumstances.
rather than demand that I create entirely new ones. As part of the reason they have proven sustainable, they work, in other words
because they dont depend on any one or anything else,
where I am, or what I'm doing at least a little control over
Oh I see and spend my days this focus
an individual well being is important as the two Ben Buddhist
teacher young? You mean your ring pushy observes in love with the world amongst journey through the bars
living, and I quote people everywhere, try so hard to me.
the world better, their intent.
Since our admirable, yet they see to change everything but themselves to make yourself a better person is to make the world a better place and go up his critical, however, to distinguish between two approaches to self employed,
and the approach that seeks to better the individual in order to be a better human being to be there for.
around us and the approach that seeks to better the individual at the expense of those around us
In the latter. We convince ourselves that, because we cannot control other people we should dismissed
entirely and focused solely
our own. Well, being we should seal ourselves from them, we should
immunize ourselves to their pain and struggles, using our limited time and energy to make ourselves stronger
more resilient and more fulfilled at a certain point. The way
The undertaking of self improvement has become self indulgence on paper. These two approaches appear measly distinguishable
Yet what begins as an earnest attempt at the first approach, can
too, to easily slide into the second. How do we recognise the slippery slope between self improvement and self indulgence?
To make this conversation a little less theoretical consider one of the practices I described in my book refrain the day the importance of making
Time, for what matters to us is one thing to ask
so we can find more time to do what matters most to us with another to ask whether we should people
Our lives depend on us for all sorts of things, and if we don't always want to do those things
people around the world face enormous challenges, as does the planet itself, without taking away,
from anyone suffering or minimizing anyone situation. Having the time
and ability to pursue and invest in our personal development, whether through podcast or books,
Valuable communities like this one reflects the position of privilege. Why should we have
privilege to reflect on our lives and spend time crafting our days to make them more fulfilling.
Why are we using every spare moments to volunteer for a meaningful cause or serve
there is in some form or another. In other words, how do we make time for what matters to us in a responsible way? How do we find a pragmatic balance, but
in pursuing what we care most about and upholding the obligations of life, not just a daily to do
So what we ve been assigned by our commitments to our spouse, our children are parents are friends and family are key,
colleagues, civic society and those in need. Here's another example throughout the Multi year
process of writing my book. I wrestled with attention between
what I found? I love doing, writing and publishing, and what, if you like, I should be doing for me that should take different forms from volunteering to
Training for a political candidate, I believe it, but it's always about contributing some form of public service. Instead of writing this article from occur.
Trouble apartment in London. Where I live now, should I be back in Washington?
you see using my resources and connections to advocate an agitated for a stronger social safety net, who I to tell and exhausted single parent working, multiple jobs for minimal
age that what she really needs is not arrays, but rather to spend
or time doing which he cares about. Sometimes these tensions lurk even closer to home the steps
you take to build more fulfilling lives in the routines and habits we construct along the way impact.
People around us? Those impacts are generally positive, but not exclusively on one hand.
it's impossible to maintain their strength for the sacrifices and struggles required for our collective future. If we don't take some time to build a fulfilling found,
nation for our individual future. Yet a commendable intention,
to spend time in more fulfilling ways, for instance, can easily turn into an obsession is easy for me to become overly focused on checking
all the boxes are important to me: meditation writing reading and so on. Every day tat takes a toll on others to not just
in the time I spend on these goals and routines, but in my resulting irritation, if they get interrupted, perfection is an impossible standard, especially on the scale of a lifetime. But many successful self improvement undertaking can make attempting
to pursue. Therein lies yet another instance of the ever present tension between self improvement and self obsession,
Can we resolve these tensions? Should we getting the balance right is tricky,
you're, running a large non profit organization that improving the lives of millions around the world, but you're neglecting to spend time with your own children are getting the balance right.
If you work for a large oil and gas company. This pumping carbon dioxide into the atmosphere and spreading disinformation about climate change, but you spend your weakens volunteering to clean up the park across the street from your house. Are you getting the balance right?
if you're so busy and overwhelmed organizing people to vote. They don't take any time for yourself and snap your loved ones in demeanor employ.
These are you getting the balance right if you decide to write a book
building more fulfilling days, because you genuinely think again help people reflect on their own lives, but you do saw the CASA
thousands of ours that could have gone to getting involved with a local mentoring program or to spending more time with your partner or you getting the balance right. These aren't rhetorical questions.
I don't know the answers, nor am I sure there are any. I don't have any
resolving the tensions between what we want to do and what we have to do between what fulfils and was expected of us between our obligations to ourselves and
our obligation of those around us in many ways. Navigating these tensions is the whole point of life. Whatever the case may be feeling these tensions.
is a good thing. We need to feel them, especially for on this journey of self improvement, because these tensions serve to guide us. We need to sit with them. We need to explore that we need to interrogate them to better understand where they're coming from. If we re toward one extreme, we Tipp too far in the direction of self indulgence.
and self obsession. If we veer toward the other extreme feeling, them can remind us to spend a little more time taking care of ourselves. Resolving these tensions is impossible.
It is and should be, a constant calibration, Enrique Liberation. The sooner we accept that
in a more often you remind yourself of it, the closer you ll come to finding a balance that works.
Or you and those around you each and every day.
you just listen to the post failed. Are you working on self improvement? Ores?
of indulgence by Adam Lowenstein of Adam Elder Blog, now really important how'd. You protect your important documents in this day and age. If something should happen to you, you'd want only
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I'm sure so many of us have gone through this back and forth this little battle of what we need to do for
ourselves and what we should be doing for others, the tough one in different parts of our lives, that balance gets tipped in different directions, but he said in the post. Navigating these tensions is the whole point
Life is important for us to feel the imbalance, explore it work with it and through it and learn from it. That's what I hope is purchased helps you do too
sort of companion to work through certain issues, see what
for you and learn in the process, so obits helping and on that note
I hope to help you again tomorrow, so that'll do for today have a great rest of day and I'll. See you back here for the Thursday show where optimal life awaits.
Transcript generated on 2020-10-18.