Marc and Angel Chernoff share an excerpt from their book, "1000+ Little Habits of Happy, Successful Relationships"
Episode 1955: An Excerpt from the book 1000+ Little Habits of Happy, Successful Relationships by Marc & Angel Chernoff
Marc and Angel Chernoff are New York Times bestselling authors, professional coaches, full-time students of life, admirers of the human spirit, and have been recognized by Forbes as having "one of the most popular personal development blogs." Through their blog, book, course and coaching, they've spent the past decade writing about and teaching proven strategies for finding lasting happiness, success, love and peace.
Marc and Angel's New York Times bestselling book, Getting Back to Happy: Change Your Thoughts, Change Your Reality, and Turn Your Trials into Triumphs, is a guide to spark sustainable action - and to return to whenever needed. It's available online at http://www.marcandangel.com/book/ and on Amazon.
More about the book can be found here: https://www.amazon.com/Little-Habits-Happy-Successful-Relationships/dp/059332773X
Go to Headspace.com/OLD for a free one month trial with access to Headspace’s full library of meditations for every situation.
Please Rate & Review the Show!
Visit Me Online at OLDPodcast.com and in The O.L.D. Facebook Group
Join the Ol' Family to get your Free Gifts and join our online community: OLDPodcast.com/group
Interested in advertising on the show? Visit https://www.advertisecast.com/OptimalLivingDaily
Support this podcast: https://anchor.fm/optimal-living-daily/support
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
A real, quick things to anchor for hosting this podcast anchor is the easiest way to make a podcast. They'll distribute your podcast for you, so it can be heard everywhere: Spotify Apple, podcast, Google, podcast and many more. You can easily make money from your podcast to with no minimum listenership anger gives you everything you need in one place for free. Would you can use right from your phone or computer creation tools? Allow you to record and edit your podcast, so it sounds great download the anchor app or go to Anchor FM to get started. This is optimal. Living daily episode, one thousand nine hundred and fifty five, an excerpt from the book. One thousand little habits of happy successful relationship.
by March and angel shirt off and I'm just a moloch welcome
Roma living daily or the O elder podcast, where I read to you from some of the best,
because I can find with permission from the authors covering personal development or self help
Minimalism. Anything I think
I'll help, you leader, more meaningful life and add some good thoughts for you every day. Occasionally I read book excerpts and thus the case today, so that less get right to it
answer optimizing your life
an exit from the book, one thousand plus little habits of happy successful relationships by Mark an angel shirt off. It weighs two be emotionally strong in your relationships, the gonna thinking that leads to emotional weakness.
Typically starts in childhood. We rely on our parents for all our emotional needs, love comfort
validation and so on
and when we leave on them too much often we dont fully develop the skills to independently support our emotional strength as children.
These are parents out of love, do their best to provide
or all our needs. Then we grow into adulthood.
without having learned how to stand strong on our own. So we look for someone else to hold us up and fill our emotional needs. We look for the perfect partner and will likely
through several breakups, because number one we are not emotionally independent
We do need to things that her our relationships in number to our partners are short
In the same way, if we ever heard, we blame the other person for her to us if they are
Therefore us when we need them, we blame them some more. If they treatise poorly
and then again we become victims. Bees we can't possibly
that with our lives. If someone has done something cruel to us right wrong, if you can really to any of this,
there is a solution and requires you to look within for the
happiness, invalidation you sick, but first, let's give you a few important points to think about what you must remember number one. If your happiness is dependent only on the acceptance
approval of other people, then you are giving away far too much of your power, its human nature, to want to be
eight and admired to want to be included, but its damaging for years.
of esteem and emotional strength is something you have to constantly fight for number. Two. At the end of the day, how
often you are is essential to the results he will see from your efforts, especially in your relationships and on a deeper level,
No, you can count on yourself to do the things you say you want to do. It becomes easier to believe that you'll be successful at bigger riskier things. Remember that practice makes progress in all areas of your life. Number three happiness is something you decide on
Your own in the present moment, whether you like your home or nor does it depend on how the furniture is arranged. It's how you arrange your mind. You have to decide to love it just the way. It is
it's a decision you make every morning when you wake up, you can spend the day
in bed recounting the problems with the part of your life that no longer exist, or
get out of bed and be thankful for the parts that do exist? It's up to you
men. Only you number four.
Validation. You need is yours to give yourself so next time you
the pressure to impress anyone tried taking a deep breath
in reminding yourself that you don't know anyone your justification.
Revel in the reality that you get to choose, you have the authority to decide how to spend your time and energy and here's a real beauty
will you dont know anyone anything you're free to give an love from the heart when you change how you sure to life, everything in your life changes as the powerful part of the simple
you're about to here. By becoming emotionally stronger, you have the power to change, not
your world, but other people's world says. Well, you have the power to change the entire
our world in some small way. By showing up as a strong is a version of yourself. The present and future are nonsense.
They are in your hands becoming emotionally strong. At this point, it should be clear
but other people are an unreliable source for meeting your own emotional needs. They will come and go or they'll be him
only unavailable, sometimes for their own personal, uncontrollable reasons. The good news is your emotional strength, happiness, validation and so on.
doesn't require their involvement. It is within you always. How can you find it and tap into it? It takes some inner searching and lots of practice
consider these simple strategies, we ve seen work, wonders and hundreds of people's lives over the years number one sit by yourself or twenty minutes each day without a phone
Abbott TV or other distraction. Look inside meditate notice. Your thoughts are sick,
get to know your might see how fast
estimating. It is, as you jump from one thought to the next. This in itself is an infinite source of entertainment and learning number to create something come up with ideas.
for building something from the ground up and then do it a poem, a painting, a song and action plan, a business. You need any one to do these things in it,
Give you added insight into your own abilities and passions. Number three exercise, your curiosity
down the source of happiness for most people, explore travel, educate yourself, red good books, keeping your knowledge base on topics, you enjoy number four talk yourself through your own problems.
and a solution if you're bored fix it. If you're a lonely or hurt comfort yourself, if you're jealous
I hope that someone will reassure you reassure yourself number five take responsibility.
If you find yourself blaming others tell yourself that the other person is never the problem. Of course, you can choose to believe the other person is the problem, but then you are dependent on them for a solution. If you believe that they aren't the problem, then you're able to look inside yourself for the solution. Number six stop complaining and instead find a way to be grateful
Number seven dont indulge yourself in being needy, but instead find a way to give a number eight give up on waiting for someone to help you and instead help yourself. As you can tell these strategies, don't really have anything to do with your relationships at least
directly thereabout you becoming an emotionally strong in
Anyone who enters all future relationships or re enters present ones with a new found in her strife, you create your own sources.
Built in happiness invalidation in any
fuck around as a whole, happy human being needing nothing more come from this place of holiness of emotional strengthening them.
Nets and then love others, not because you need them to love you back, not because you are desperate to be needed, but because loving them is a miraculous thing to do
you just listen to an excerpt from the book, one thousand plus little habits of happy successful relationships. I mark and angel shirt off big thanks to both mark and angel. I've been narrating from their blog for years now and their featured across many of our show. So it's a pleasure to share an excerpt from their brand new book with you. Just came out April six succumb check it out. You go to mark and angel dot com. Of course, I will recommend that and always have links in the episodes. Descriptions or Amazon is an easy way to find the book quickly and in this book they share essays unlisted goals. Tell you stay on track with your relationships, be it with us enough in other fields.
Member friend or, as you heard in this exercise to yourself, so thank you again to mark and angel congrats to them on their new book. Thank you for being here, have a great rest of your day and I'll see you tomorrow, form and most Monday, where optimal life awaits
Transcript generated on 2021-04-18.