« Pardon My Take

Paul Bissonnette And We Bought A Conversion Van

2017-04-21 | 🔗
The NFL has released their 2017 schedule which means the fastest 2 minutes are back to break down the Thursday night games (3:07 - 7:59). We bought a conversion van with 215,000 miles on it to drive to the draft in Philly next week. NHL/NBA Playoffs, Lebron is amazing and the Blackhawks are dead (7:59 - 22:55). Paul Bissonnette joins the show to talk Playoffs, handshake lines, what he doesn't like about the NBA, and our fake Canadian accents (22:55 - 45:05). Segments include Tiger Woods Update, Lebron Blames, Locker Room Talk for Alex Jones Man Cave weed sessions, PR 101 for those that fail the Wonderlic, and a brand new segment Guy's on Chicks. Plus Jimbos and the craziest update on PFT's e-book
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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promo code take for twenty dollars off your first seek geek purchase do right now download that siki cap and get twenty dollars with promo code let's go it's twenty first and the nfl has officially released their thursday night color our schedule
we start the season in the big diarrhea bowl cincinnati oh as captain america jj watt plays one of his three games of the season coach pillow bryan cranston is back in better call saul as we follow justin jimmy want mcgills devolution from a small time kid out of her walkie into a big time lawyers pacman jones these legal defense and the texans don't have the long arm of the law brock osweiler to bail them out anymore texans beat bengals five three in a barn burner watt as if the schedule couldn't get any better in week three we take you to the big bell bottom levi stadium if you're going to san francisco the mamas and the papas will be watching the two young baby coach is playing a game of suck and blow with their pacifiers and the shadow of pebble beach where i made that forty foot putt let's roll the tape uhm the niners beat the rams three nothing
sean glengarry glen ross clinton the leads are weak go up to the frozen tundra that's almost as cold as olivia munn's heart to face aaron rodgers in the green bay packers mccarthy and glue the new mike and mike hey bone my wife let me stay up late enough to watch the thursday night game is presented by state farm insurance at the subway fresh take hotline ten outta here greedy you stupid fucking weenie bears get out john fox forty nine seven we jumped awake five the patriots at the buccaneers standing on the corner jameis winston tampa fl such a fine sight to see it's a running back my lord with a lunch pail score going by the name christian mccaffrey comma billy will be severely
going to draft a white position in player in philly take you now to week nine in the rex ryan dr scholl's bowl bills at jets tie rod the tool man taylor verse broadway joe jay cutler in a battle for the afc least there's a shortage dill doe's in buffalo as a plug all the jets holes like fleshlights the new york jets and brace tom petty are free falling down the standings as new york locks up the number one pick of the twenty eighteen nfl draft bills twelve jets three
the ray we now move on to week eleven as big benjamin netanyahu roth lis berger directed his occupying forces of the steelers onto marcus luttrell mariota's land as these two titans go to war but there can only be one lone survivor and for whom the lavion bell tolls it tolls for thee mike mccarthy steelers melt at titans two thousand eight hundred and twenty four week thirteen in oh my god it's tony romo's music as prescott got damn stop in week twelve the cowboys trailed the w word redskins late in the fourth as romo makes silver out of cole beasley had its fourth and goal with the clock ticking out tick tick tick
i took an romo takes a snap from shakerite what he's he's scrambling lebanese rumbling and his bumper letter all the redskins win in romo is down on the field and he's hurt his back is broken his heart age i can't look don't be a pussy boom w words beat boys two thousand four hundred and twenty but not before jerry jones signs romo to a five year deal and we moved to fifteen at the broncos at the colts and you'll have to forgive me because when these two ponies get together i get a little horse andrew lucky horseshoe tries to lasso the broncos only to get bucked off and told nae by von miller as horses beat the horses one thousand seven hundred and fourteen more horse on horse violence than a braveheart movie hey boom i just realized put these teams and we're back that's all good that felt good except for the fact that i now have a splitting headache
yeah my throat hurts but we are back you know what we needed a break from doing the chris berman and shows every monday but after it and you don't know what you have till it's gone and i really feel good about getting can i get we have a huge show for you we have nba playoffs we have nhl playoffs the blackhawks are dead we have tiger update we have paul bissonnette biz nasty but before we do any of that because it is america the nfl schedule all has been released in prime time because everyone needs the nfl schedule in the middle of april this is my second favorite thing about the schedule release my actual favorite thing is the announcement of when the schedule is going to be that happened on monday and they were just like hang on guess what guys thursday night
it's on it's actually it's like the new pope the white smoke comes out here like ok they are now ready to announce the new pope the nfl is now ready to tell you what game what shity game you're going to have to watch in week ten and love it right except it's just it's pac man jones chimney and he's just blowing so it's four hundred and twenty so that's how you know the first to wish you a happy four hundred and twenty didn't even realize could tell releasing the schedule on four hundred and twenty problematic very attorney doesn't but he doesn't let his players smoke weed because for pain management so he releases the schedule and then he see it then he's going to give a drug test tomorrow that's also like the first robin of spring is the first random drug testing for twenty one i just want to say new segment will bring this back later but i want to introduce it here it's called
i'm not mad i'm just disappointed okay and i'm not mad at the nfl i'm just disappointed in them because for the first time in what feels like ten years there's no jaguars titans thursday night color rush that's so up it's really messed that was probably my favorite game of mid october every year without a doubt without a doubt because you knew that both teams were going to suck and you knew that it was going to be atrocious and you knew you're going to watch every second of it and and somehow the jaguars had a shitier color of mustard every year and it
it's so sad it was the quintessential nfl thursday night game and they took it away it was the animal lion near color rush to yeah i think it was invented just for jaguars titans like holyshit these two teams play each other twice a year we need lucky to squeeze a dozen viewers out of him in the first game it's sad because it was it was basically the nfl playing chicken with are dumb brains like hey we're going to put this game on the schedule you're going to know it's on the schedule from april on and guess what you're going to know it still going to fucking watch going to complain about it for six months and then annual tunein and you're going to watch it and we wish they brought it back and they let phil simms call it this year that would have been great we also if the nfl schedules being announced that means it's time to predict every single team's record based on shift that no one knows so we haven't done the draft yet people haven't been in
third teams go up and down every single year no matter what but guess what you can circle in the bills to lose a week fourteen match up against i don't know the steelers give it to you really easy bills are going to go five eleven and eleven that's what they always jets are going to go to thirteen and then every other team has a chance to go anywhere between six hundred and one thousand and one thousand one hundred and five hundred browser win two games except your team if you listen to me right now your team yeah they can go open sex absolutely have a couple things break that's that's you know what we call those the either or games you steal one at home games milwaukee here could be a walkie your voice a lot of teams are going to steal one at home it's here the falcons look at their schedule i'm not so sure what to think of the falcons yet though the falcons on those teams it could be good i you know that in the superbowl they played well they they played a little bit poorly hi i'm just not sure whether or not they're a good team yet who who had the easiest schedule i'm looking it up right now so
the top yeah that's the other thing the toughest and easiest schedules when we don't again know how any team is going to perform you don't know who's going to be in there out but guess what the oakland raiders oh oh oh oh there we go the raiders have the easiest schedule i don't even know know they have the hardest schedule wow good to eat since it's football season anything you you'd like to save thing no no there's nothing that i'd like to say oh yes thanks for reminding me very problematic that the our words are hosting a game on thanksgiving have we not learned anything that was going to be there is going to be really set the tables a lot really share over sharing their bounty with the cowboys yes the giants yes collection are we sure are we sure the chiefs are good i'm looking at their schedule right now they might not be they might not be good yeah shannon are words are playing a game too yeah exactly we also have some big news we looted to it
on wednesday we said we were going to go buy a conversion van and guess what gosh darn in the in the words of roy williams god dang it we went and did it garnet we picked ourselves up an automobile it is a sweet car it is awesome it is a color rush car yes it's like a teal it doesn't really i have that weldon neither of the front doors work yep we experience at the hardware yeah we pulled into a gas station just fill up the tank just top it off yep and a big cat got out of the path of the driver side and then he constructed anymore yes that was the first i was with a meeting voyage probably twenty minutes into it we bought it it is a one thousand nine hundred and ninety three v gladiator he is older than hank we have a we own a conversion van hank is now these still actually the youngest member of this podcast we bought it for nine hundred dollars steel very well people are saying
it's off i think it was a steel what's it's got two hundred fifteen thousand miles on or any up we're calling it vinnie would had he would head because got a motor that won't quit we help the up to my breakdown yeah i don't know i'm so we don't know and we are taking it to philly for the nfl draft next week we will be in philly with vinnie what had what's more philly than that apps nothing absolutely not there they might turn into a swimming pool yeah i leave the park for long and if it survives it's coming on great week with us yes so i don't there's no chess set it survives all of great we just call that it was one of the more a part of my take part of my take moments when basically on tuesday were just like let's just buy a conversion van and then it just escalated into owning a conversion van going to a pretty sketchy insurance play some queens where the guy he
it's like a you know if you need to commit a crime you know go ahead yeah do we talk about this so yeah so we walk into this or we knock on the door of this insurance company and i like buzzes and he said what do you guys want like we're looking at insurance he's like what do you mean we kind of who's driving this thing and like he is and he's like ok take a seat it'll be a minute and then just like sat at his desk doing god knows what he calls us up and then he's like you but to use on it or you what you can do is you just tell you don't you don't say that you gave him the car you say just took it from you so i drive it yes that way is kind of covered and you don't need to do two guys yeah only one guy on this insurance because if i put you on who that's going to be some money it was so it was out of central casting and it was perfect for this van so we have a conversion van we have insurance we are legal it legal ever we're coming to philly so philly get ready any of you philly award winning listeners out there you want to you know have a couple paths
he knows whatever you say i don't even know just eat patson gino's probably won't see you yeah that's what happened we have a lot of add add room on this thing is got big panels on the side so any award winning listers out their own a candy company i feel like a candy company would be the perfect sponsor this shady asked van yes we just want to put big advertisements for free candy on the side of this thing park is close to zones as possible yeah so slide in the dms if that's you yeah slide into those dm s right we have the playoffs the blackhawks are dead yeah so i was alienating i actually feel more short change in this than you do because you didn't even get the opportunity to get emotionally invested so i don't even get suicidal big cat i've just got big cat who's resigned
next year it was so fast and so sudden and so humiliating and embarrassing and just like gross that it almost it really don't like the last year the blackhawks lost in seven to the blues that was crushing because seven games the puck bounced its arrival this was just like men we're just the better team the entire time there's only do so it in terms of like embarrassment it's at a hundred in terms of like crushing boss it's not that high up because it was it was it was basically no it's not i mean like the blackhawks had no chance after game two if they did they score a goal they scored a couple goals they actually doubled no they scored what three goals in the series ok
pretty good hat trick yeah three goals in four games at could not bad average you know i i like my washington capitals yep who are taking the league by storm i'm i i i've taken my finger so far off the panic button yeah i'm i've got ones in the air right now yeah my finger in the air calling it we're going we're gonna sweep the penguins yes round i i'm not even concerned with macy's on okay i like this thing that the the capitals are doing where every game against the maple leafs they go up like two nothing three nothing it's like wow easy sailing and then it just all hell breaks loose also we're winning in spite of the refs i just want to put that out there so stay woke on these officials in might be canadians might be you know is trying to slide the puck over to our toronto so
you do realize so this is your doomsday scenario because the blackhawks exited in such embarrassing in quick fashion that like no ones going to even remember they were in the playoffs by next week because it happened so fast right oh i am so but now it's the caps all eyes on the caps and if they disappoint it's going to be all the jokes hey hey you see that cartoon of ov holding the golf clubs like the stanley cup that's pretty funny that's really funny yeah but i will say this is it time to press the panic button for the blackhawks for next year already yes i actually i don't want to get too too deep into it but i do think there are issues at hand they were it was one of those situations where they had a lot of old guys all young guys coach doesn't really trust the young guys young guys aren't really ready old guys are going to keep getting older really slow so your guys are going to
to be honest i'm still going to stop for the blackhawks write this down and i am concerned about some of the contracts let's just say that oh ok yes your big cap guy now i'm a big cap guy we also have the nba playoffs and lebron james turns out he's really fucking good at basketball take that nate silver little stupid spreadsheet nate doesn't know anything i would like to see five hundred and thirty eight has to say about the playoffs right now the cabs were down two thousand five hundred and twenty five and one in the fourth five there were down twenty five in the second half lebron scored his final statline was four thousand one hundred and thirteen and twelve decent that's a really impressive individual stat line that has their yes good job yes that was i mean that you can't hum the paul george lebron james rivalry better than lebron james
paul george score thirty six have a great night and losing in a soul crushing fashion you know what i'm really looking forward to is next year when the pacers lose in the first or in the second round next year they're gonna to the second and then they'll fire coach again because the pictures always think that they could do better at coach just switch it up but they can't yeah just switch it up also in the nba the box are common hot what do you know the box one hundred and four to seventy seven and guess what deli had ten points deli also well let's not talk about how many points he had as an individual let's talk about his plus minus which was like plus
twenty is plus twenty yeah the bench was unbelievable and now we have to ask just toronto hit the panic button yes they do and whose man's is the box that would be g on us it's john yanis attitudes show summer of janice he blocked a shot his elbow today the greek spring the greeks freak the for yeah the greek freak also you know what i don't like about the whole johnis like getting you know he's blowing up right now he is his spring people now going well actually on how to pronounce his name once i put your name one way it's pronounced that way forever john is a tempo yeah john c johnis atomic itself you're janice greta contempt go where exactly so all right and then hank are you or hit the panic button right okay so buttons but you can green lot of panic button everywhere you want to five seconds you can green we haven't had a game in between shows but give us a little puke in green i think they can win the next game handling they can win the series ok ok i actually i don't disagree with that
so that's a solid assessment yeah this room right now is a big closet of anxieties right now between all the bad stuff that we have happening well no i'm actually become clear now blackhawks i got got the lost off my books yet black cock yeah you the blackhawks are off the books so it's all you know i don't understand what's going on you know what the only thing i could say the cubs win the world series the blackhawks i think the bulls somehow or winning is this the year mike glennon wins mvp yes definitely yes saying weird things are afoot let's get to our interview with paul bissonnette talk about nhl some more and also he actually got interviewed by todd and gordo for a little bit there sorry so that should be a good one let's do it if you're an award winning lester chances are you're already consuming these other guys stuff but if not you should download subscribe unsubscribe resubscribe leave five star reviews we've got great podcasts like mix tape i was on it today so check it out i was able
car pulls freely not under the dictatorship of pft okay that's great if you wanna hear tell you enjoy your big cat talk for fifteen minutes about the bulls a bore you to death that's a great one to sit down with a cell that brown go to any other episode except for the most recent one the big cattle on last when i was on to talk about polls okay let us too okay you too bye cast now well no i i join him live noticed you haven't been that focused on casters okay we've all we got we've got four play for plays great golf podcast proposal sports with the golf guys golf boys trigger warning there tiger woods fans yet big tiger fans so don't whatever you do don't tell them that tigers back we've got read and ryan whitney kid on spittin chiclets the number one nhl podcast in the world check it out kid download download download we've got kfc which you are an alumnus of hot alumnus enriches live ammunition marie to see up it so yeah check your happy young and happy that's right caleb and rona and ran yeah you might know him as an
go yes pn so check out the whole stable guaranteed to make your day a little bit better but don't stop listening to part of my take is there a block thirty o n zero one thirty our best friend uncle chaps how could we forget we save the best for last we now welcome on a recurring guest is paul bissonnette from the ontario reign he's here to talk to us a little bit of a little bit about the stanley cup playoffs and we have to start with the story of the night the blackhawks are dead and on the other disk your honor out what was so to tell us you know from from someone who's played the game for so long what happened i mean is this just a simply a hot goalie or is it just one of those weird series where everything goes wrong or the
this day scenario the blackhawks score is too old and time to start shifting some things around and blowing some stuff up yeah i mean that's like that's the big question right now but uh you know i haven't seen him miss demoralised since i was playing with phoenix and my teammate raffi torres and it's very life on the ice that's not cool it will go on yeah and makes me that and i got a little while ago yeah mike smith smith flopped right is that serious yeah i think so that was also a big story line and yes i believe it was shaw who nudged him yes and yeah he gave her a big lebron lebron flop saga game for that i don't hear it think it was yeah it was it was it was the worst flop i've ever seen in hockey it was disgusting but the you're right this is not been seen from these blackhawks i mean even last year there down in the blues they come back they play
they force game seven what i mean have you ever been part of of a team or series where you just can't get anything going and it's like you're you're fighting up hill all orders are as long you're arguing that a perfect scenario is awesome the american the last year will two years ago we want it so we don't lose around the last year we kind of got me right through to the conference finals and we read ran into the lake eerie who is columbus is far you man up going on the way there but basically small dress for nothing to wear like we we had all the copper there's like we and all the sudden the just like we we are we we a little box so what what happens he was in the lock room there like what you know obviously the blackhawks are and so this isn't even like hey how can they turn it around thing but is it
the situation that did it linger to the next year is it something that kind of stick with you and mean it is this is this a series that is going to now to find the blackhawks going forward i mean i don't know i wouldn't i wouldn't go crazy with it i mean you gotta give it at least another season i mean they've been attackable run and yeah i don't i don't think you had the panic button yet but i've been hearing word that like clinicals on the hot seat and stuff and i'm like what i like i mean it's one year they i'm sure they're going to be looking around the locker room and being like man what just happened like they've never been dominated like that i mean even the series they've lost in the last
white eight years they've been going out of the work where every year ever lost in the first row i guess we did what we did last year but it was seven games and it was a tough series from right here right yeah and and that provision in general as a sole competitor like i mean the saint louis is out unreal teams for her just as long but they haven't been able to get over the hump i mean chicago started three times that would be really embarrassing if you went into the playoffs as a number one seed overall and then failed to meet expectations i can't even imagine what that's like for big cat that being said i need to tell me that the caps are going to be just fine i i thought of the caps could overcome this they would do ok but man just like sydney
roger the parents have their number man i know you don't want to hear that well let's look ahead let's look past the series i like that i like we had yeah i you know i i definitely think bill bill do you draw at all but then i think that they have a mind torpedo pitchers are mine torpedo and in the capital's heads in the end you know it's you know where it's going to go yeah i do so it sounds really painful by the way i don't know what a mind torpedo is but i know enough to stay away from the box so the capitals could explode screwed the capitals i agree with you anne pfd is he obviously has a right to be anxious because that's what he's expected every spring but i do think that capital is going to win this series how much does it back the team though to go like
six games are seven games against a team they probably should have beaten in four five i mean that was that was a big issue with them last year with a i think the place still the first round and they have a lot of losing game four and five to push this series the sex is that correct yeah that sounds right well i think that that's what happened and they were getting not a lot of flack after them getting beat out that they wasted too much energy when they could just finished australians for and and you know they let him hang around i mean an nrg is huge this time of year and how you can serve it for sure yeah yeah it is another thing that i've been paying a lot of attention to is the sharks out west and all their injuries which they have some they've got some pretty rude keyless was injuries going right now with with co tors
wired shut like five places are you have you ever played with and i'll rephrase that what's the coolest injury that you've played through all i mean what this year that's kind of where the i dos that eight sixteen games in the year i i tore my acl on my right leg so i i i'm i'm kind of on the fence between retiring after the season or not and i wanted to re habit without getting surgery to try to come back and finish the season so i did came back was a little too early capri having it and i just came back up you got two weeks ago like just keep playing again before playoffs and playoffs
and my first game back i tore my left bc also so now i have two torn acl so i'm done for the year i gotta get surgery now it's almost better than they might if you have two torn acl's it's better than having one because that way there's symmetry yeah well i mean yeah i mean science and and i get to do it through the same surgeon so i get two brand new he's like what better what more could i ask for going into retirement are you having your surgeries at the same time like do you get a wheelchair or scooter no they actually do a mod they do 'em three weeks apart 'cause you can't be under anesthesia that long you know more information that i found out you're not hanging tough what's that hockey talk i to doctors to do for hanks right two doctors doing
one need each time war the guy doing mine is a very very good need doctor at all what like but we are not we talk about symmetry and i we want this same guy on both sides right and symmetries overrated now because you want to right handed surgeon on your right knee and a left handed on your left yes you don't want to get you his back hand on your knee are you retiring yeah but what if one guy just had the best night sleep is sleep with his life and then the other guys having problems with his wife and he's you know he's space cadet it out all of a sudden i'm you know i'm outta wack yeah yeah you might not you might not play in the nhl anymore that was how's mean i'm lashing out i've been cornered i've been cornered tonight that was mean are you retiring uh i mean i mean chances are
rule breaking news you will break it what do i was hoping to do it at the next super bowl i got caught not there you go that's perfect i can't i can't be one up did you see my bucket challenge yeah that's true that's true how should we break it on this show we should know we should think we already did yeah we should we'll figure something else will brainstorm that so don't break it yet we're not going to break it yet it's you're still mowing entire make bleep out the r word the retirement so what if you were to retire hypothetically speaking what what's x what's the next chapter of your life for you i can see you be like you should open up a professional like shittalking camp war i saw that you guys do summer apprenticeships so i was going to hand in a resume but i mean the ship talking clinic would be that's very good option so those so canadian of you to call an internship in apprenticeship
lester solicitor welders soria welders paul we're not even you know i mean a pretty well shoemakers here i i i look i i i like almost cried when you guys came out with that stupid jean jacket the media you know you know you have cousins who look like that yeah i i was i was born ten minutes from welland on it's right beside niagara falls but yeah that was me growing up you guys remain a mystery did you get those clothes from my parents basement i'm sorry we might have i don't know they just showed up one day and it worked out pretty well seriously go out west now that the blackhawks are dead they're done they're finished their big thank you have a team probably never gonna win another stanley cup i just saw the street by the way my answer i was just on the street the first ever one c to be swept in the first reading that's that's the
dubious yeah by national great hockey town that's tough big time hockey town yeah so who do you like out of the west i'd i'd have to say nostril now are are you asking other than them i think it's such a toss up between everyone else i don't know who's going to come out of this edwin series i i don't kerr i mean i don't i don't know what i mean says i like saint louis to but i big natural just looks too good right now but that's who i would pick they do look good in mean big cat having having argument going on here so we need you to settle that i i like the predators yellow uniforms he thinks their candy asked are they candy ask are they good what will you remember me bc ferries to chicago probably the best sweaters in sports and it's an original stick so he's just like he's not in with you know with the fads and stuff
or like man i have the most iconic jersey as well he's a sweater plus he's a sweater please respect the game so what's your take on the national i mean there okay i mean it it's kind of like a like an oil or orange you know it just keeps the desert arena looking crazy german playoffs in the same with the red and in calgary but i i you know i i think it's okay i much prefer their whites though by the way i i i appreciate you saying the west and not even thinking about mentioning the anaheim ducks because you know they'll blow it 'cause ryan kesler is going to blow it 'cause he always does so i appreciate you doing that yeah now that you say that i i have forgot them about them a little bit building pretty impressive in the first round two yeah we all do until they blow like a three one lead in a series somewhere yeah but bruce boudreaux's not there anymore so
true that's the that mother bruce boudreau that you knew that would creep up on a yeah true he's on the other end of it now in minnesota true no true what's the deal with the canadian ace being shinier i think that has to do with projects you like like you guys notice at san jose's are really dark yes yes yeah it's a some some ranks i i definitely know that the specially on the ground yeah the new building yep and there's a lot of zero on there too yeah the lights yeah edmonton calgary like you can barely look at the ice it's so shiny lot of maple serviceability and then out west in san jose on in their stadiums they have the like the snowflake little fifteen watt bulbs the eco the green ball so it doesn't silicon valley
what it can can you because we obviously play this game with every hockey guessed nba playoffs as well what do you want to basham let's let's awesome nba playoffs i didn't do anything i don't like about basketball just like it's pretty predictable who's going to the conference finals right yeah it's never really a surprise so it's just the first row first rounds a joke does anyone even pay attention until the conference finals in basketball lebron was down by twenty points in the fourth cory's ago i guess we'll start trying now yeah yeah and then they won yeah you ever it will brown deleted all essential the other one that came yeah breaking news i only watch the fourth quarter yeah did i yeah they were never down in my mind because i only watch the fourth did you see ground deleted all social media stuff too i mean that's kind of like do to have a little
have a little willpower door hockey guy spectrum is an athlete and i know you guys love dragon autumn like i just feel like he's a he's a little like scripted everything everything he does is calculated where i feel like the people comparing with jordan where i'm like jordan was so much cooler like he just carried that like cool cockiness where i feel like you know it's four spy lebron and you know he's an unbelievable athlete i'll probably get roast on twitter for this but yeah i just i'm way more of an mj fan here we go do you think that there's an anti american bias in the nhl amongst the canadian players uh go more into depth i don't i don't really know what you're saying like you guys are there any slurs that canadians use against the united states players no i mean no i was no if you want to make fun of the guy from the united states call one i don't i i it never heard of a canadian being so
hi to somebody united states i was just i was wondering like we call you guys you know we do the whole crazy how do you make fun of us i mean the guy was like oh yeah you yankee like david be like what did you think not even an insult i got what would you even say hey there you have your delta doing rich guy hey there you you wore winter yeah hey hey guys i got a bigger you know just typical stuff hey with your better more expensive medicine okay maybe maybe they'd i mean what's up something else that allowed me all those guns up they all all those guns you shoot yourself all yeah you guys have to put a lot i thought we shoot each other we shoot each other thumbs up you only have but one or two moose above your fireplace what is this yeah get some answers on that wall how old do you
keep the rain out give her something to do in the in the bedroom now this is devolving quickly moves devolver currently and the best part is you're so canadian you're so canadian there were making fun of you and you're like all it's a pretty good impression i actually might who would you get those calls from my mom and dad i noticed a trip in my jeep goes the other day you want to say to my face or what actually no i want and that's a lie i can i have the i have the conversation a little wide hi i used to rock pants like that when i was in grade school and live like it's just as wide and baggy and we had snow when canada like up to our knees so like i would get in from like a recess and you know the bottom half would be completely like dark it was so waxes absorbs all the snow like i was such a loser
obviously they look cool on you though everyone had everyone had back in middle school yeah oh really i was like the only kid in canada where are they only had only one pair of jeans per country in so real big thing at my school not even exist outside your elementary school in i know you were there wasn't social media a big thing for us growing up was to be like hey i got this hot girlfriend she's a model she lives in canada yeah did you ever tell people i've got this hot girlfriend she lives down and minnesota that's also handed other it's basically canada edmonton just scored just to give you guys an update breaking news warmington all right we have well i have one final question for you we rag on the handshake line all playoffs 'cause people force it down our throat saying it's the this thing all sports and all this you read every single series
yeah you've been a part of many handshake lines you know it's both right are you walking through their grit in your teeth and like i still fucking hate these guys uh no it depends how the theory went but most of the time when when you're done and you've had all that anger the whole season of like hating other guys are playing against and all of a sudden you're like ok now i get to going up like a week and a half long bender and relax i think the anger kind of just every goes away search that's good boy you're awesome because that's that's awesome to me right now yeah because there's also having that much attention for you know for like you know basically a week and a half two weeks and then all of a sudden it's all everything's all over you did you did you just use just come on our shelf
i want to watch a man when are you going to be in new york you gotta come by oh yeah i do so i i kind of want to i kinda wanna shoot on tres yes i think i could i don't know i think i could score at least a couple real confident in yourself there well i didn't score any when i play ok but i think it's gone that guy with two torn acls yeah what they'll be healed up by the time on there there we go just for that yeah if you seriously if you wanted apprenticeship were open for apprenticeships well are we going here yeah i was going to i was going to talk about maybe joining with sean spittin chiclets cool that would be good that would be good that would be good because there's so much boston on that show would be nice to even it out just the access yeah sure yeah
if we are agree with that there is a lot of boston on that show you respond and the one guy yeah here at like hasn't even left sophie ever your response right there was exactly why you need to be on that show just sure oh yeah oh yeah sure that's a great point ryan yeah strong strong defense your statement we actually have one last question the the the camera segment right now we might as well do it with you the stay classy maple leafs fan yes sir did you hear about the the three capitals islands that were maple leaf square yesterday yeah so when they were leaving they asked if if they if they got any a corral smith from the canadian fans is said just a couple people were like get out of here but that's about it so also stay classic era yeah come on we're better than that canada would you guys actually like big like holy but how would those people that night yes or is it like all those guys are losers are soft
no so i don't understand why all of toronto watch is every single one of their sporting events outside raptors and leafs or have you ever paid for a ticket in toronto no no i truthfully haven't and and it's all you can go to some dive bar either like strength like canadian like liquor laws and attacks on their expensive but yeah i mean but that's just how crazy are about about hockey there i mean do they stand outside her basketball yeah for the playoffs yeah they stand outside for bass for the raptors oh geez why did he could have raptors oven fries and lately i don't know man if it's not even cold canadian with all the time here in the world cup two for soccer yes in a way that you guys haven't been in a world cup for like thirty years well but so we you that was great basketball analysis by the way oh yeah the raptors been buzzing i think their loss
for example if you ever since they got the rosen and the other guy hey pst you are wrong actually the the women's canadian soccer team went to to soccer for the world's are yeah yeah true it was in canada could forget yeah they played on the turf are they actually they actually got hoes against the americans from a lot a there are they lost because on the rafts were were paid by americans that's exactly what happened yes yes you capitalist eric's by not the officials now no bribe in canada alright biznasty thank you so much for joining us we appreciate it hopefully will see you soon and good luck with the surgeries man that fucking sucks yeah i know i'm sorry thanks yeah thanks for having me on and those needs are going to need some big old pretty soon it's right the knees are going to need
some room to breathe so we got an extra pair of ginkgoes when you come down here will put those on ya and that'll help you a little bit like a hyper bericht chamber yeah exactly alright alright boy thank you alright let's do some segments let's start with a little tiger woods update so we had an update on wednesday that he was kind of back 'cause he was alive up bring some shots wearing pants for a change yeah that was nice turns out wearing thirty gosh pockets on your pants are hurt your back so tiger out of fort baxter acts i have a story one i have a stay work on that okay i think he's actually getting a hair transplant surgery now he's calling it back surgery so just keep and keep that under control force our service strategies getting steroid employee
tidenes by slow a slow release steroid implanted in his spinal cord it's like that summer when kobe went to germany and there's like i'm going to germany to see the sights and a couple of the doc if i were tiger you know what i would do during my back surgery i'd say just cut my dick off while you're there who really if tiger ingram yourself no no no no no big difference cut his dick off let him keep his balls if tiger woods didn't have a dick he would shipping offer yeah he be the best golfer in the world yeah censorship fact it is so just have a have a ba dickey i to me real quick but what poor tiger fan stay at i are there actually people out there who still think the tiger woods is going to come back now is the time to take the value bet yeah you'll never get more value than this i like oh his campus framing it and he's been doing this recently anytime
back surgeries like just a minor procedure on my back just cleaning some stuff up yeah just going to clean it out so tiger woods who's back of the week not tiger woods for the seven thousand consecutive week we have a lebron blame so it minutes the come back and his huge night he took a little bit of time out to yell at tristan thompson on the court in front of the world it was classical brown planes because he did this the do this thing where yelled and then was like you know what forget it like i should you know what i'm big i'm i'm a team leader the i'm put the city on my back i'm gonna be the bigger man yeah stop yelling at yeah i'm a put cleveland my back here somebody you know what to it was needs to read and so the godfather he needs to read the story of the scorpion in the fraud you know what that is yes so when the for all you on cultured people out there it's win the frog carries a scorpion across his back
or across the river on his back and the scorpions like don't worry i won't sting you in the river because if i sting you will both die and then the scorpions just sort thing in the shit out of him in the river frogs like why did you do that is like i'm a scorpion that's what i do tiger or lebron james needs to read that parable because if you have guys like some tops our team what do you expect them to do again a suck up yes when you trade for kevin love in the new a kevin play defense right it's like you traded for kevin love right that's what you up from time to time and also lebron james you're the best player in the world not everyone can be lebron james yes he you know what he is he's like if you get on he's the guy that gets a seven week old puppy and the puppy pisces in the house is it what the are you doing yeah it just screams at the puppy see and if we're along with that he should be more like michael jordan and just hit steve kerr with a newspaper on the mouth yep that's it that's all it is be a champion
lebron in the spring is like i want to hate him so bad and then he just does ship that you're like funky so god dam good there's nothing i can do yeah he is really good we just need to get him back on social media that would keep it seems like no ones here once you get some social media he's much better and much less insufferable ism no but when he gets on social media is looking he's cruising for perfect booties on instagram and he's doing his stupid bleacher report is on sale search and he's to and he's got a new these get the new kendrick album before everyone wants everyone to know and i got the kinder got one twenty four hours for everyone else very humble of and yeah he wants to do all that stuff and i'd rather have that because in it's like i know why i hate him right now it's just he's playing really well and i almost forget sometimes when i hate you just remembering all the stupid shit that i used to do right yank thoughts item no matter what
hank hank is brown with anyone in the world probably got paid to get the kindergarten like him and kendrick aren't friends yeah kendrick people were just like i will pay him money for this out yeah you're stupid instagram stories we've been noticing you been doing stupid instagram stories let's put kendrick on those we have a pr one hundred and one for all of the draft prospects that do poorly on the wunderlich so little wonderlic shame going on today by our our my friend there and fell heat dalvin cook and leonard for that for that got a levitz on the wonderlic so shame shame shame so in addition to the announcement of when the schedule is going to be released the wonderlic leaks are another favorite part of the spring for me but this can be very easily taken advantage of by a potential draft pick if you are running back if you're like a quarterback or an offensive linemen not so much if you're running back guess what i like my running backs dumb there
when they're dumb there's a reason very sanders retired early and image smith got the record his berry started really when you're smarter you can tell when your body is hurt and then you're like hey i better not play football anymore when you're dumb you don't feel pain when it comes down to it well first of all the wonderlic is problematic it's the definition of problematic because people have learning disabilities and then they get shamed by people like darren rovell but i really only care about my quarterback being smart that's really i mean maybe your middle linebacker it's really i'd rather have guys who are just really fucking good at football i'd rather have a dumb ass for a kicker i'll tell you that much i want to kick her that doesn't know what about robert aguayo yeah well that's just pretty might be too smart yeah church over thinking really want to have issue though
that's a good point that's actually great won't like a west virginia dropout kicker yeah like rather blog then make millions of dollars in the nfl i wanted i wanted to kick her that didn't even go to college i want to community college kicker right by the way for pr one hundred and one everyone should just if you have a bad wonderlic score you just need to re tweet the old cardale jones tweet the why should we have to go to class if we came here to play football we didn't come to play school classes are pointless 'cause it's like hey i might not be good at wunderlich but this guy wanted national championship got drafted sore here's what you do when you spend so nice i don't use number two pencils so much to miss read it i only use number one pencils because i'm focused on winning or no other spin zone bad test taker eighty d now you get that adderall prescription you want to cheat like the seahawks yeah hey and if that's you would just like couple laterals our way
just for the rams are old that's fine t are open we have a little locker room talk this came from the alex jones trial that is continuing and absolutely hilarious so today in what is it is even called that position you might get position i gave for the globalist to read so alex jones the first force dot com prisonplanet dot tv the first thing we learned was al shown smokes weed once a year to test its potency which is i don't even know what the fuck did not check it out once a year because they go dormant keeps changing up the strands of the genetics of marijuana and you got drilled tord saurus funding all the lab so you gotta make sure it still ok so he said to monitor its strength which is how law enforcement does it he tests it once a year and to make sure that people don't get brain damage from it it's really nice of him to do that yeah so
some kind of weed yeah that exist in the world i smoke one we do yeah one we have here and then here's where the locker room talk comes in he said that he smoked weed on joe rogan's podcast because it's a man cave show where you do man cave thanks yes and i listen that whole show and it was a man cave show i think i think that holds up should be allowed to do whatever you want with joe rogan well we already learned in the aaron hernandez trial man cave defense is a real thing that's right and plus joe rogan is just like a spirit counselor right like if he's got in you through an experience you should be able to that experience i doubt fear of repercussions i feel like alex jones it will take walks into joe rogan's podcast areas like owes man cave and then just like pops is top right away yeah i'm like just starts eating a raw steak well i know we're search says and they got my control ages in the search now that you buy a kmart and kohl's i make my own
hertz i love this trial i hope it goes on forever it's so fantastic what do you say about memes he was asked today at his trial if his kids are like ashamed of seeing him on the internet all the time he said something along the lines of no i'm like one of the number one means in the world right now they love seeing me being a meme yeah yeah i don't know if he really understands what that i don't think he understood i don't care and i'm not a me me guy i'm a wee wee there you go list we can walk from talk of newman's well i will add to the list let's do it hey what's up louis
the discussion pardon my take can hear you there no no no not do that no we want to talk about man caves do you have a man cave like a place where guys can be guys you know like you you watch tv you got nice leather chairs tv then i was in the member everything like for for fucking three years that's the mantra is original did the original in prison called called your cell man gave yeah back in cave two by the way but so you've never been in a man cave flowers in the fucking house in a fuckings cage for fucking three years yes by yeah but but the man cave like you don't you don't have a man cave alright well let's pretend there's a man cave so like hey what's up lenny you watch do you watch the mets game last night i wanted to know
oh yeah yeah hey i'm talking to this mic hey you want you want to blunt here you go hey let me get my friend joe rogan in here will smoke some weed and do some dmt together expander mind yeah hey lady hey why don't you suck our dicks that mean a blunt weed bro four hundred and twenty try again with haley you wanna eat a big bowl of chili in her short term memories now you know what a man caves like we just fucking guys talk about puss ian shittin like suck my dick lady what do you say but the federal reserve we should audit the fed ron paul check out ronpaul dot com hey ron paul is at the gate it up alex jones yeah we have alex jones here right now you want to talk to him he's here with us in studio lady doctor how's it going how's jonesinfowars dot com prisonplanet dot tv baby i like your style with you saying back there and get him he's here long time no talk but how you doing thank you i do listen listen
you suck my dick we're on we're on we're on all right that was a thanks for lenny to come on the show talk about man caves appreciate it always love to have money on this is a great guest yeah i always very knowledgeable wide wide depth and wide breadth of knowledge is all about yeah airplanes money jail jail prison dignity ball honor yeah i have it yeah we have a emergency football guy for mike gundy because mike gundy is lost his mind i think my god he's lost mine last year so he's in the mall great move he's killing snakes he's talking crazy and now he's created rings for everyone on the oklahoma state football team with a record of eleven two only problem is they went ten and three he's just pretending that the central michigan game was a win
and he just got done reading one thousand nine hundred and eighty four and so he's like i can just eliminate things that i don't like from the record yep and one thousand and two hundred sounds a whole lot better or john three wasn't yet and in three three yeah that sounds great ten three is a great sounding he also he he had been addressing it it turns out he had been addressing his team all year saying that they had won that game so you really yeah she's bought and he actually thinks all life you believe it's true this i think his slow devil and into mental instability started with his i'm a man i'm forty rent i think what happened was he went out and he saw how good it felt to say something crazy and be perceived as like a crazy dangerous person in public but he's like you know what i'm just going to be fucking nut for the rest of my career that's my brand that's what i'm going with i'm going to out crazy mike leach i'm going to outlast him mission accomplished well if you're the oklahoma
state head coach you're like i'm not gonna go be a head coach anywhere else i'm going to be that make the oklahoma state head coach rest my career you can then just grow into the crazy guy and i like it will probably end up that you'll do what what was it well when he haze you broke choke someone wrote a player at the end what's going to happen when it we will be a fallout will be gross they're going to name the field after mike gundy as he still coaching there yeah and then they're gonna have to take his name off the field right when it turns out that he liked drown to recruit in a bathtub for not showing enough toughness a prat yeah wild rattle snake was biting him in the back of the neck yes yeah also a quick football guy update we have a rivalry that is probably gonna be the greatest rivalry in all sports lane kiffin verse nick saban which we already knew was robbery but lane kiffin is finally talked about it and he said they were talking about by getting yelled at on the sidelines coaching technique and he said i don't really do that
it's just not really how i do it i'm not really big on humiliating assistant coaches in front of everybody i write down notes in the staff getting i explain what we want to get done and then i go humiliate myself online every single day after that much better technique i might have added that last point the finger at last first yes pulling kevin he did he did not like the nixie been humiliated sorry sub tweeted them in a press conference right so like it may be a manual subtweet we need to get fau verse alabama so that nick saban can score one hundred points that would he would never take the first came out and my god he might just instruct his players to like not only beat them as badly as possible and that they use turf but also play tear up all the turf as are playing so they don't have a field anymore i need that game so bad last me before jimbo's we have a new segment your segment alert do we have sound for that or something okay yeah yeah
new segment alert guys on chicks so came up with that explain the new segment just guys and checks you know sometimes things happen with checks like with their bodies and i feel like you could do a great service to our listeners by explaining as guys what's happening with the female body check ca as well we've seen a couple of female bodies if you know what i'm saying is better to explain what a checks going through then it got huh so in this special episode of guys on checks we're gonna talk about serena williams oh she's pregnant now okay are as as your old friend from high school is a check on facebook says preggers preggers congratulations she won a tournament nine weeks pregnant a major tournament so for guys out there who are like hey what's the deal with that i think like sunday morning when you have heartburn and maybe a little diarrhea then go with a turn
nine weeks yes i have a deal to check even know that third pregnant when they're not house pregnant problems like probably like i don't know man i'm just i'm having a fat day you did have appeared i forget also when you when checks don't have their period they retain more blood this is a fact that was i don't think so that that's what i'm getting at they have more blood in their body which carries the oxygen to their cells fast just yet you can look it up in any any signs to facebook in america this is how the female body works i've seen a few times not to brag also chicks get a glow when they get pregnant yes and it's statistically proven that teams that wear red colored uniforms do better because red is color of dominant so anytime you start to glow when you're pregnant it gives you the edge so technically being pregnant is a pd also when when pregnant everyone says you look so beautiful so little self confidence boost so serena another pd issues she was working with and like we said i mean what's the worst what's worse at nine weeks pregnant is like i mean
i you know i i i either but i yes he's a pizza that left out overnight now she's yeah it feels like you had breed at at chipotle with guacamole and cheese and sour cream right you got you got the works that yeah on the car too long to go to the bathroom right that's what that's just for being pregnant is is having the works right and their scenes you know serena williams jump into the crowd and her her nose like derek jeter that's a real tough thing i was in this term in australia yeah yeah every two every thing in australia is either poisonous are pregnant this isn't something that we should like a rate log that right what happens so that's when you say we guys on checks i understand what pregnancy is we just explained all right jim bos within the week my colleague jumped on the phone to speak a client today upon our client answering my colleague shouted hey lenny naturally a bit shouted back suck our dicks no one of my office listens to be empty and ever looked
like i was an yeah that happened i don't think there's no i actually think that happen because i think it happened in his head it it does have and in my head now i'm fucked my own head up a cuss myself with this podcast podcasts concussed me by the way did you guys see this is unrelated is kind of on a tangent but patrick beverley on wednesday night he had a three a big three and he did the finger at the pinky point i did yeah russell work i'll tell you we got to get that kind of podcast 'cause what that sam dekker told us like there's no more disrespect in the world than pinky pointing at your opponent what we call that that's the klay walnuts if you want yeah sopranos he pointed with his index and is being at every time yeah exactly all right walk walk have t this one true buddy buddy thank
okay your research i at the bar wearing a tie dye shirt was pmt listener so i went up to me and said hey man suck my dick he wasn't wearing a p m t shirt all right yeah i i think that that might have happened just and i'm basing this off the fact that big cat and i have been told to suck peoples dicks doesn't dozens of times in the last couple stop that i don't know how i don't know unless you stop it tell you what i'm suspending suck my dick from a greeting that's something that you say after you've built rapport with somebody so we were going to brainstorm we're going to think of something new the award winning listeners can greet themselves selves with but i think we made a mistake when we jump straight to just saying suck my dick to strangers i think that's fair so i work from home today because i'm having directv installed installed my internet upgraded my
higher office definitely thinks i'm a huge stoner now that's true yeah an if i may i have no problem with weed i smoke some weed oh really but people who say like happy holidays on four hundred and twenty those are the biggest yeah i'm i'm sorry i i'm sure those people is is it just smoke we just have fun you don't see there's a holiday come on say happy holidays on the holidays and a merry christmas because i'm not scared of being pc that's right people on four twenty they get into this mode where they they have to dress and act like the biggest or the stereotype it starts right now i'm not coming to where i'm staying at home watching cheech and chong yeah i'm gonna listen to pink floyd those are fake stoner yeah they're they're just smoke some weed listen to some three hundred and eleven on the train you fucking loser conceding eleven suck so yeah but either way we appreciate all of our world and i think we probably have a healthy high population out there
hello to you just don't say happy holidays that's weird i took a forty five to fifty year old home from the bar as last night this is the conversation we had this morning the test the tax change the guy the the gentleman that is said hey you can't get pregnant right lol i d k how well how else to ask and she said no i'm old as dirt sam my ovaries are probably does pause by now us as with an old lady and crime she's she sounds pretty cool yeah sounds like yeah hey it sounds like you might have just earned yourself like a cool like grandmother type figure this guy also prescribes to who are philosophy that if you have to text someone something that's uncomfortable just had an lol or haha all good all good i was listening to pmt
well writing checks for my rent and bills i must have subconsciously heard you guys say it was two thousand and sixteen 'cause i wrote all that on all my checks now my landlord is charge me a late fee and the electric companies threaten to sue me for trying to pass bad checks ok this is another one that this podcast is concussed my brain 'cause i truly do think it's too sixteen in my mind it always will be i'm just we're sorry but you don't realize with jim moses it's really it's not even jimbo's it's really you guys have fuckedup our lives and i apologize or vice versa what we're working on there so i'm saying people's people are writing in gymnos being like hey love the podcast thanks for fucking up my life my brother got into a car accident and he was dying on a hospital bed say hey man you heard her injured yeah see that's our fault that's our fault we're going to do better we're going to we're not i just want to know i don't mean
no we're not going to do that we're going to apologize when we screw up yeah kind of yeah except it wasn't related to hank and i won't say i'm sorry really not mad i'm disappointed i last one actually talked about aaron hernandez potentially being a free man are national podcast on monday then he killed himself two days later yeah that's not just on monday we've been talking about that up in spanish but i never got suspended by the nfl and you have this is a nice segue to your don't know if it's jimbo but it isn't a check though i'm in a big pickle so i mentioned this on wednesdays show this is unbelievable it is so i had an e book that was coming out it was actually supposed to come out a couple weeks ago but things got delayed just so i could promote it correctly that you wish it did batch i wish i did i can't put it out right now and uh and why is because my book is about aaron hernandez an in the book he may or may not have committed suicide
so the book that was supposed to come out on wednesday or thursday at it was preempted by the real thing yes so either i have to wait a week before everybody stops caring about air internet is again or alternatively i could just sell one copy of it to martin shkreli i think we need to do that so it's like the wu tang album that he bought for three million dollars martin shkreli i will sell you the only copy of the united states of america versus stephen a smith and i will only charge you fifty thousand dollars wow that is generous yeah you know i mean i'm just doing is generally doing it because how much are you doing to suicide prevention hotline all forty nine thousand other wow that's really generous yeah there you go the i still can't believe that that happened the timing of that and
and it was so creepy because on tuesday when we talked about your book coming out and we threw out the hypothetical water skip bayless died tomorrow what if i died yeah fork and then boom error in it who's hits like five hours after we take the podcast i am the real victim in this whole ordeal he wants but using it isn't bucking tragedy and i feel really awful about my bad luck on this crummy situation at all revolves around me yeah hank you any jimbos all right we will see you guys on monday get excited the conversion van van go ahead is headed to philly probably going to see our friend big ant the two point version van you have any wood is headed to philly if it can get there i actually have to drive it back to brooklyn tonight i'm not too excited about that but that ok spend so nobody's going to steal it yeah true well known brooklyn is probably like a vintage someone will some hipster will steal and like all the tickets are like
coffee roasting company out of it yeah yeah so coffee roasting company in vegan quesadillas yeah and vegan tattoos don't you squid ink yes so that is the show and we will see you on monday love you guys i'm john horn on the host of geffen playhouse unscripted i'm here with our very first guest rain wilson hi john looks like i'm the first guest on the gas in on clothes unscripted unscripted yeah let's go with that by marriage made in heaven i guess for west would tune in for some of our exciting upcoming guests david copperfield neil labute neil patrick harris josh gad rita wilson and many more be sure to download new episodes every wednesday on the podcast one half in on itunes and don't forget to rate review and share and i'm rain will send the first cast your very first guest and playhouse unscripted huge mistake
Transcript generated on 2019-11-18.