You're listening to song exploiter, where musicians take apart their songs and piece by piece, tell the story of how they were made. My name is She case, your way song, splutter brought you by progressive. Have you the name, your price tool, yet it works just wait? Sounds you tell progressive how much you want to pay? a car insurance in You coverage options that fit your budget. It's easy to start a quote. And you'll be able to find a rate that works for you, One of the many ways can save with progressive, get your quote today: a progressive dot com and see Four out of five new auto customers recommend progressive progressive the insurance company and affiliates pricing rich match limited by state law the explorers sponsored by distro kid. Turkey has always been the easiest fastest and least expensive way to upload all your music to streaming. Services like spotify, apple, music, tik, tok, more They offer so much more, including a wide range of free promotional tools for artists, like the promote,

a website that includes links to your music on streaming services and more district kid We even automatically pay your collaborators, so you don't have to hire an account to get ten percent of your first Here's membership just had to decide kid dot. Com, slash vip, slash song explode, Julian baker is from memphis tessie to release them. second, how will turn out the lights? In october, twenty seventeen on matador records the new york times, cauldron, music, quote devastating and pitchfork the album fescue music and this up, so the julian tells the story of her song appointments and how writing it. how to work through our thoughts around addiction, depression, and relationships doing, also takes part the track over, which was originally written as part of appointments within split off as a separate track.

You join baker. do you ever think to say something, and then you know that you should not say that thing aloud happens to me. I know that a thought is irrational under save it and exploring and the sun like ice, and inadequacy, and like an impostor syndrome, when I would talk to my friends or when I would be at a party just standing around out just to have this bizarre paranoia, though like I'm not what any of these people want it and I'm disappointing them, I'm letting everyone down, and recurring thought was, I think, probably the first idea that crime in my brain fur. The lyrics. I know that I'm not what you wanted. no. The shoe

appointment materialised around the weeks in which I was starting to figure out ways to be more proactive about dealing with recovery and mental health, like actually going to therapy in actually taking care of myself. I was sitting on my couch in my apartment in tennessee and creating cord progression and improvising on top of it does the voice men I made in my house you, can hear, is stepping on the leaping pedal, its mr continuous leap of that I place other points on top of it,

So. a play, accord progression and then, as they're getting recorded tis a loop they build on top of each other. And I just noodle around in this reverberant landscape, improvisation, isn't a very special and therapeutic place in its own way to just sit with a guitar and play for forty five minutes of uninterrupted sound just transporting to somewhere else. It's really nice refuge from constant consciousness and thought that's bombarding you always. The lyrical content is derived from actual. Relations there had with loved ones about feeling the immense isolation that results from living inside your own head and fear that you always feel isolated and,

being able to express that to another person. I was thinking over the conversations that I had had in the last week, allowing myself to confront thoughts that I'm having that I know, are rational. The lie You should try not to miss anymore appointments was something that was said to me. I should just none too soon. Paul? having someone say that, and That being the only thing it can be offered in the way of comfort or encouragement fell like empty and very fragile, and I remember being disappointed in that phrase and thinking so detached and sterile, and has

nothing in the way of empathy attached to it. it was intended to be carrying, but I think also you're in that isolated mindset, is difficult to not view things as a personal attack. of course now that I'm two years. Your move from that. I understand how nuanced and delicate those social patients are and how no one really knows what to offer another human being and that's The crux of the whole record for this on its own a place where neither person is being understood. So I have the raw material of my thoughts and then I do, And just let the thoughts kind of tumble over until they settle into where they're supposed to go

So we need a recording it at ardent studios in memphis an engineer, calvin labour. On time friend of mine I being most comfortable with the idea of recording with calvin, because it seemed like the most conducive to the creative process was going to be the environment much more than the equipment that I felt is with the person whose recording the record I play of hindered. I would cast her and retract other parts separately The reason why we did it is so we could manipulate all of those separately and set of his having one chunk of guitar. appointments is the second track on julian bakers album the first.

It is an instrumental called over, but there's no gap The two tracks over acts The intro to appointments so originally over and appointments were all one song thriven chopped up, so purposes of this episode. I'm concerned Two tracks, as one composition, so actually tell me about over as well the view First thing that you here, where the studio where it closes is an attack. took place, you inside the experience of sitting down to create these socks. You hear me and my carabine her walk over, hence sit down at the piano. over begins with a version of the opening led part of appointments, but in relative minor This minor piano riff

I mean and then one of my friends, cameron, boucher, came to underbelly would wins. Its clarinet and then sacks and then camille faulkner place violin and it all just sounds kind of crystal, right. All these sounds was floating. And then Camille and I just sat down at the piano and I played the courts in the riff, and we worked out this turnaround that would take the cord progression in the minor and

I will end up in a major key I wanted to feel like there's a lot of tension and then for it to resolve and disappear into the very first notes of appointments, which is in the major key. Negative emotion into a positive emotion, and so I wanted for that. Tiny art commit occurs within over to indicate how the rest of the record would flow from despair, to provisional hope, Maybe there is a lot of her

we processed. The focus was also based on mimicking emotion, being told in verbal lyrical part. The record all told in first person, but is an attempt to locate the self in relation to where you are inside your head. in the archipelago part there's multiple harmony, singing different, lyrics, felicity, Maybe gonna turn our, I probably not. I know that it's not you ve got affirmation, yes, it will be ok, no, it won't be ok and then you ve got uncertainty. All of those things being spoken. Simum Lastly, there all located in different places. This speech voice changes, its location in the mix. To give you the sense that all of these thoughts are happening, concurrently, fighting for attention and

competing to be heard too. Yes,. The vocals are being executed in this desperate and almost erratic way. When I'm admitting that to say aid to someone everything's, fine everything's fine is more. for my benefit that's something that I'm pretending to be more confident about, and so on to convey it in a dramatic way.

When is turning a cyclical, negative thought pattern into a refrain or a chorus is liberating. Writing. Songs was part of that Healing process itself I mean for a while I felt like I was in a fish tank because I was just experiencing this sadness and constant anxiety that I wasn't dealing with

but I was just living inside of an anxious it felt like I could do nothing else, but inhabitants in the music, it is supposed to be a vehicle. Or for expelling those things from my mind, or at least just admitting them, I don't report to have like everything and that's why singing about hopefulness on this record is. very tentative? it's like a provisional hope how small the pin hole of light is? Isn't it possible that within today or the next week for the next months that we could feel closer. Something like joy.

now, here's over and appointments by julian baker.

You shall be easy.

Visit song exploded dot net to learn more about julian baker. This up though, to sponsor by nissan the future will be great, but Ray is just as incredible meet me son. the most advanced light up. If you can't enough adrenaline, there's the all new four hundred horse power, nissan sea or fear, offload adventures. at the altar rain nissan frontier, if you're more The spontaneous road trip type of person happened, the need on pathfinder and for something more elect rick, there's the stylish nissan aria, so Let's enjoy the ride. Twenty one three aria and z are not yet available for purchase expected availability this spring. For twenty twenty three c and this fall for the twenty twenty three aria. This episode is sponsored by story worth an online service that helps you connect with the special people in your life through sharing stories and memories. It's what I'm getting my! Add this year for fathers day every week, story worthwhile, email, him, a thought, provoking question that I get to choose out of a range of options they provide so give all the father

figures in your life, a meaningful gift that you can both cherished for years to come story worth it now for a limited time you can see ten dollars off your first purchase when you go to story worth dot com, slash song, explode her! That's s, tea Oh, are why double you o r t h, dot com, slash song explode her too If ten dollars of your first purchase story worth dot com, slash song exploiter. song explorer is produced by me, along with christian coon's with her, from in turn, olivia would Carlos lemme Creates original illustrations for each episode of the podcast, which you can see on the website song exploded as a proud member of radio Tokyo from pr acts. A curated network of creative independent pie casts made possible by listeners like you, learn more At radio tokyo donor family, if you want to are your thoughts on this absurd. You can find song explode on facebook, instagram and twitter at song. Exploded

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