« Anything Goes with Emma Chamberlain

Advice Session #3

2020-07-02

Emma is back with more life advice for everyone. Topics like getting over an ex and how to deal with a friend starting to date them, thoughts on diets and the best ways to stay healthy, keeping a good relationship with your parents, especially if they are divorced, overcoming image issues and gaining self-confidence, and so much more.

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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Ramble. Now, one HBO Max Search Party, soaring Elias Shock CAT and John Early- I never can pronounce name- So let's just go easy on me here in this area. he followed Dory, drew portion Elliot for New York Millennials their greater worry is how long have to wait for a table at brunch until they discover the one of their college. Classmates has mysteriously vanished obsessed with finding their missing friend, Dory and her pals and bark on a. Was to solve the case along the way they encounter a private detective, creepy whacked out cold and very lame dinner parties and when the truth finally comes out, which it does our heroes are finally left trying to cross the border after accidentally committing a murder allegedly later Dorian. Her friends Try to return to their normal lives at home by the truth, eventually catches up with them, because the truth is so annoying during Andrew,
themselves on trial in the spotlight with their names. Suddenly trending. Will they have time for brunch? Will they have time to pay for their crimes like they pay for extra Ricardo and their two's find out when search party season three premiers on June twenty? Fifth, only on HBO Max high everybody welcome Danny goes hits me am. I thought I had a rough, nay last night I'll get into it so super anxious day yesterday, I dont really. Why? I don't know what happened? What came over me? I leg was spiralling all day about different things: mines he was just so bad. I don't think I've had terrible of anxiety in months, but a creep up in it caught up to me. So the anxiety was going on and then when it was finally time to go to sleep. My body was like no no you're. Not doing that
none of that for you. So I literally sate up until four p m and could not sleep in my mind was racing and it was fucking awful, but the Good NEWS, is. I knew this in a moment and now I'm living it last night I was like tomorrow morning I'm going to be and like I know, I'm not gonna be anxious about any of the stuff turns out woke up the next morning was no longer anxious. Why is that, like? I don't get what it is about, nighttime that makes anxiety ten times, whereas I cannot figure it out. It makes it so much harder to control I think it's because you kind of know that you need to go to sleep soon and settle down, but the thought of settling down is like it makes you more anxious and the next thing you know you're up until four a dot m, so I slept until and today- which I have not done in a really long time, and it was kind of-
lady, but you know what we're according to day, we're gonna have fun we're gonna talk about what you guys needed based on today. We're doing advice session number three, I'm so excited basically advice session is where you guys asked me what you need advice on and then I play big sister for the day, and I know my giving us the advice that I have so, let's get into it, Am I just made them as discussing Burke, I've ever made and I cannot leave it in because you would all never listened to the progress it like. I was the craziest burp. I've ever heard. I don't know why, Burke only when I'm recording for actions, but literally all the time, but those Terrifying. Some really! Sorry, if you there's her that anyway, now, let's get into the questions, are number one
Somebody wrote in I feel so unloved and out of place because I haven't kissed a guy yet or had a boyfriend yet and I'm seventeen totally know what you mean? I was very similar is kind of a lake bloomer and. Like socially and like physically, like obviously a late bloomer. You know what that means. I don't need to get into it, but, like I just didn't fucking going through puberty until I was literally sixteen and everybody else want their people do when they're like twelve. So that was interesting. For me, my literally got my period when I was sixteen. So if that does- tell you how late of a bloomer was at an hour well, but I just was like really like the thought. A boy is to me edges almost so scary that it wasn't even appealing any more like the thought of kissing I for me was just out of the question I was like. I I'm too scared like I just can't
who had let you would be so awkward. I know what I'm doing like you know all the fears that that one has when it comes all those things and at the same time like, because I was kind of a lay bloomer. There were really a lotta deeds that were interested in me at the time when I was in high school in school, and all that in a totally made me feel unloved, even though it was also parsley. My decision, like I also didn't, really want a leg. I wasn't ready to. Like start the whole boy like I was too scared fur, how many years, but even though I didn't really want to either I also kind of deep down dead and. I think a big part of it, too, is that nobody really ever should enough interest in me to make me inspire. till I put my fear aside like ages. I don't have that makes sense, but I totally get it the thing
I think I wish I knew when I was younger and I hadn't kissed a guy yet or had a boyfriend. Yet is that There really is no rush, and you dont know that when you're in it, but I think some people- are quicker to start those things like some people have their first kiss. Unlike sixth grade and then it she's crazy from there and some people, some people or more like you and me where we may be filled, we'll get scared or uncomfortable by that and You have to wait a little bit longer for that to feel comfortable for us. Both scenarios are completely normal, healthy and fine. I think, for your specific situation. My advice would be too I'm a guy that you feel really safe in comfortable with maybe even started
dating a guy like whenever you start dating a guy, save those things for for that person where you know that they aren't going to judge you and that they can kind of help. You feel comfortable with all of these things and they can kind of guide you. You know what I mean so that you're not like slick more discussed, you know what mean when you're dating Somebody'Ll a care she eminent members can undermine and then they can cause. help you through that Billig, don't even be nervous, like there's no pressure whatever that's ITALY's least how they should be acting. Another thing you could do this I have more what I did when I was anger, I literally was I don't care. I just want to get it over with. I will kill anybody I just want to get. Out of the way so that I dont need to be nervous anymore, so that I just like kiss random do he was a random but like somebody didn't know very well what so that there is no pressure like I actually ended up being
becoming friends with him after like, and we kind of just forgot that whole thing happen, but it was kind of nice, because there's also like I didn't feel like this pressure cause. I literally admit him twice so is like ok, I don't care What he thinks, I'm not trying to impress him I'm not trying to date him. So there's no, like pressure, of like. Oh my god, if I fuck this up and I'm never going to be able to talk to him again, guys, like you know, but I want to date him like there's so much less on the line when it's somebody that you don't really care about their opinion of you, so that can kind of be good too, but I think either of those options are but just remember that there is no rush and that you have whole life to tab boyfriends. You have your whole life to kiss boys, there's just no rush and if anything, It's just not that exciting right leg once you like, get it over with a newly. Have you first kiss him it's over then, like the thing becomes not his fun anymore. It's almost more fun to like
dream about it and like speculate, what it's gonna be like, then it it's more fun to do that almost than it is actually kiss guys or girls or whatever How did it isn't great and all? But you know what I'm saying like there's something really special about the time before you had your first kiss when you get to dream about it and be like. Oh, my god it that you know retail like wonder: it isn't a billion euro next one. How do you deal with non mutual crushes and love God? This is the way first, and you know I've actually handled, is a mobile differ ways in my life. So I don't know, I think, there's two options right. You can kind of befriend. Let's say it's your friend right. You can continue to be friends with them and enjoy their
many and just kind of like Loki Manifested leg. Obviously don't have too many expectations, because I can end up hurting you, but also remembering that it's like not impossible railing, it's not impossible, they could come around and they could be like you know it actually you're pretty fucking awesome. Let's, let's date, you never know. So I think that never like necessarily giving up is step number one leg. You'd be surprised. People will be fully like no way. I would never day you and then would turn around and do it. It's happened, I've. It did these things happen, but if you're feeling like very hopeless, nearly there's no way that this is gonna work or you're, not even really that close with this presence. That is no way that you can like bond with them. I say that you do Try to find somebody else that you have a crush on to replace that right so like even if it's a fucking, this might sound psychotic. But even if it's like a celebrity, this is so weird but like what
was younger? I would advocate On a guy in a leg was going well, I would literally feel I like a celebrity that I thought was cute and I would watch their interviews in use that as a describe distraction to like not think about the person I had a crush on. I don't know if that's weird but I've totally done that to do that with all I can say that prevents those living in Lebanon. My group regrets that. No, I'm not gonna regret that. I'm not gonna work, because this fucking and I am also not the only one serve Reagan. Fucking, relax. Anyway, moving on somebody said my foot his dating my axe now- and I told Her- I couldn't mentally handle being friends with her. They were going to be in a relationship, and I not know that was the right move. Moreover, meaning answer this question, I actually had to put myself in you
our shoes for a second, unlike with Think about how that would make me feel. not gonna lie. Do you have any of my friends dated one of my ex boyfriend, I would not, while it depends on which one, but for ninety per cent of them, ninety nine percent of them- I wouldn't be able to deal with it. I dont think like that, would make me really uncomfortable. Because I don't know many people who wouldn't make them uncomfortable. There's there, art types of relationships right, there's like the type it leaves a lasting in print you and then there's the tiber you break up and then you never think of them. Again I mean they're. There really is the two separate types is that what you're saying it sounds like you had more of the first one, so you had more of a relationship where left it, lasting impact on you, you are absolutely intact. To have those feelings, your those feelings, are valid.
the ceilings are normal. I dont know many people who would be ok with their best, and dating their acts. I mean I would never in a million years date, one of my friends ex boyfriends. If I was really close, my four legged, my best friends ex boyfriend, I've never even go near just because a fucking Quote out like girl code or whatever, that is, but it is not right, Linkages is weird especially you're, really close with the person. Still I mean if it's like an old friend, and I mean there's a lot of different situations, but if it's your best friend or what really close friends, you hang out with all the time, and they did that. I would say you are. I'll make deserve to feel like that. You did not make a mistake by. her hey, that makes me feel weird. I'm enough, I can be your friend. That's exactly what anyone would do I feel like. that you. Unless somebody was in a relationship there was one of those ones
were not as significant and like you break up, and then you don't think about it again like that type. Ah, then not be as much of an issue but because it seems like he mentioned a lot to you or whatever. Of course, I can't even imagine seeing one of my best friends like with one of my ex boyfriend, like that, would make me want to throw up I'm not I'm not kidding. I would make me want to throw up I'm thinking of, like my two best friends right now like if I saw them specifically with one of my boyfriend that would literally not that would make. I couldn't be, but I would literally be like you need to break up or something like I can't be around So sorry was like somebody that I didn't really know that, while dating one of acts boyfriends, I wouldn't really care because it would be different. But if who is a friend you'd be where it so you absolutely deserve to feel like that
Your friend shouldn't even be dating your ex boyfriend anyway, if it makes you uncomfortable period. Thank you, too. Athena club response rings. Episode of anything goes. Self care is very important, but when you're somebody like me who doesn't make self care priority. Sorry sorry, it's true Concerta feel like I'm spending more time shopping for products than actually taking care of myself, which is why I think I'm so lazy about it like trying to figure out what products to use is so much work that I just give up before. I even try to come up with a really good self care routine, but thanks to Athena Club, you can find safe, high quality self care necessities all in one place, without leaving your home. Athena club offers clean and sustainable self care products all in one place. Without the market, feel good toxin, free essentials like deodorant tampons, probiotics in so much more available on their site. It's a one, stop shop for better products made with simple ingredients.
I love everything about at the club. I mean it's so convenient. The ingredients are clean. Some not worried about the effects that its having The quality is amazing and the price is very affordable. It's a win, win, win, win, win! Another thing I love about Athena Club, actually is the option for subscription customization, so you can include as much or as little as you need each month and it's all shipped to your door subscription started literally just eight dollars a month. You can manage the shipments to fit your schedule, so you never have to worry about running out of Will you need? Athena club believes that you should never have to stress about what's going on in or around your body? It that's why they only source clean, sustainable ingredients that are safe for you and for the environment. There all about transparency- and there was every single ingredient on their site, Athena club offers a better self carotene made simple, and now you guys can get fifteen percent of your first order just go to within a club, dot com and he's promo code. Emma, that's a t, age, IE and a sea l you be.
dot com with promo code E M M, a Emma from fifteen percent off. Thank you at the club. Next one one of my best friends keeps argument. Now she wants to live life on the edge and do drugs less drink alcohol, which is just really not my sort of thing, and I don't know what to do in finding a really stressful This is so. This is very normal. I feel, like everybody deals with this weather, it's like a friend, that's kind of wanted to go crazy or it's like, or sometimes it's you that wants to go crazy. Like you know, this is very normal, so I think the thing that you have to remember is: what your friends do. You know on their day to day basis her where your friends moral codes are at at that specific time. That doesn't mean that you need to do what they're doing for one, so dont feel
Oh, my god, if my friend starts doing this- and that means I need to start doing is absolutely not its and those are not those This should not be in the same sense like if you dont want to do the things that she's doing rule number one. Don't do them. And if she tries to pressure you and do it then she's a problem, so your friend Should be understanding if you dont want to participate, that's thing number one. If you need to have a car station bouquet you can do whatever you want. I can control you. These are things that are really agree with these things that I really want to do. I'm so gonna support you in love, you, but I don't know if I can, hang out with you, while you're doing these things or with you, do these things around me like I'm, not gonna, participate knives! Need you to know that there's ways you can communicate it so that your friend understands that, you still love her you're, not judging her, but you're not gonna participate. I think it's coming to this agreement. That's as
so I will respect you and I will still be Friend, even though you're doing things that I agree with as long as you are ok with me not doing them in you, don't judge me for not wanting to participate. It's this equal Spect, and I think that if you can establish that, then you guys will be fine. Another thing is when kids started experimenting with. You know now go I've noticed that a lot of it tends to be a phase. You know, like I mean obviously at a certain point in like young adulthood, it's like no longer affair in some people go different directions. Some people continue did participate in those things. Other people stop completely cause they like, fuck this, and then some people are in the middle, where they're like I dapple occasionally, and I think that you know Your friend, who knows your friends, wants to experiment. She's
we know she's probably settled down eventually, I'm not saying that she's not going to do those things if she's like she might but you'll probably end up settling down. I think it's in the beginning, when kids are first starting to try things where I just go crazy and they just like whatever and then I think, a lot of the times. Kids kind of end up finding this. This balance worth even though they're not supposed to be doing it. I'm not You're supposed to be drinking under age, doing drugs and raises not what I'm fucking saying trust me, but I'm just say but this is the reality of the situation. It would be ignorant for me to say: well, you should be telling your free not to do this at all, because That would be number one there's not going to get. I mean you can try to tell your friend like a maybe you should rethink this but if they're gonna their programme do they're going to do anyway, so be a place of support for your friend so that they can lean on you
them advice, try to talk them out of it plan a seed Billig. Maybe you shouldn't be doing this, but if they do and regardless which usually people going to do they want to do, and nobody can stop him. Just know that, like it's, probably just a phase and if it isn't that price settle down But who knows, but the thing I said in the beginning of the whole, like mutual respect, thing we're, like you guys both respect that you don't agree on that topic. I think that's the best way to keep a strong friendship while having differing morals. You know our next one hi I'm. I know this is specific, but I need help on it. My parents got to and has really young and I've been living with my mom. I don't really know my dad thou well and I'm having difficulty having a good relationship with him. How do I start a conversation with him? My parents, so that divorce, when I was really young- and so I understand how you note jarring that can be and how it it's kind of easy,
two thousand eight hundred and eight actually is really difficult to have a good relationship with both parents, and it takes a lot of practice to find that balance and and it's tough, but I died it's never too late to you grow a relationship with somebody. It's never too late to you know: men, those relationships, it's never too late to, like start fresh. Ah, I think that you guys should one if you guys are in the same area, are nowhere your dad lives. But if you re living a similar area, it could be I said I grab coffee, grab, lunch and b, with each other in real life and just kind of start bouncing off of one each other, one
other- and you start talking about random shit, I mean leg catching up, unlike how your school life is. How is work life? Is you know what Hobbes you both or undue, and then you guys can maybe find something they have in common? Let's say you both really like tennis or let's say you both are Philly interested in. We both really love sushi or something find things that you guys have in common or find something that you guys can teach one another and then put energy into that. So it's about like finding something that you guys can bond over. Then going from their. So let's say you don't really know much about tennis, but your dad is really really good at Tennis Bialik, hey, maybe you can teach me how to play tennis and fine little things you guys can relate over and like fine like something that you can do together. I think that's the best way to build a relationship is when you're doing things with the other person, because it
so with being like, oh god, what are we gonna talk about, like you know, we're just like sitting here and doing nothing like I don't know, you know fines on the you guys can do together. That's an Tv and I think from there you know any. I was somebody, it's crazy. What happens naturally, just because of nature next thing, you know you're going to be talking about this memory in that memory. Next thing, you know you're going to be talked about your feelings about this or that or you're going to open up about these other things, and I think the step one is just spending time with him and getting comfortable with him so that you feel safe to talk about your field. In open up our next one. I am. I was wondering fur advice session number three. If you could give me some advice on learning how to be comfortable, my own skin, I have agony and agony scars and they just make me. ugly and I'm on medication for currently, but it's a big struggle and I take care, skin and I'm sorry
and secure about him. More than anything, I know he struggled with agony. So how did you not manage to break down about I love you and would love some advice on how to not constantly over think and feel you and would love some advice on how to not constantly overthinking feel insecure about my acne, my acne scars girl. I totally get this. I had acne for. Polly six years on and off, and I just finished shaking Aquitaine, which is you might be unoccupied, sounds like it's the medicine that makes? Hopefully all your agony go away. The thing about acne is that we need to understand. Is that it's not your fault? Ok, nine aims at a ten acme's hormonal and that's not a religion Zack I made it up, but based on people, I know like there's nothing that you can do it doesn't matter products you use it does matter it's we're mono in it, so fucking normal. So many people have asked me the thing
you need to remember is that you're not gonna have agony forever. Ok, you will fight, a way to get rid of it. It's all about patients, whether you grow out of it or you taken medication like you will get through it, and it has nothing to do with your character. You're still an amazing beautiful person, regardless of your acme or whatever acme, doesn't it sucks dude, if really socks, and I I totally understand like it's one of those things where I'm not going to tell you like that, it's easy to not be insecure about it. I used to cry about my Hackney all of the time, all the time, all the time it was my biggest insecurity, and I mean I've struggle with so many different confidences he's my life, whether its with my body my skin bubble, bubble bar and agony was no access. Then again it was. That was really that was vital
it is thing I've ever dealt with. I think that what you need to remember is anybody is judging you for your acme is an asshole there's no need to feel I'd, so tough, it's so tough, because. I, like I struggled with it and I never truly figured out how to get over it. I mean, I think, for me, My main priority was just finding a way to heal it. You know that was like me number one priority and that's what kind of kept me inspired was like one day, I'm not going to have acne anymore one day, I'll be able to get rid of it, and you know it eventually. I figured it out, but it took six years. You know of never so, but while you're living in it- but you need to remember- is leg- it doesn't define you, it has nothing to do through your as a person.
And it's so normal. So many people have acne. Most people have actually at one point in their life. It doesn't make you any less beautiful, If anything, I think my experience having acne was so humbling and actually made me appreciate. One once it went away like once, you know I, when on Accutane and it went away like now. I feel so grateful for that. And I dont think I would have had that feeling of gratefulness otherwise, but also, I think that I too We understand acne now and I understand people, they go through it as well, and. So, I can relate, whereas I feel as if I would have gone through it. I would not be able to relate or be as support for other people who go through it. You know and that something I'm really grateful for You are absolutely just as beautiful with agony as you are without it and don't let anybody fucking
different? Not even yourself. Don't let yourself tell you anything and like you, it it dont. Let yourself tell you any differently. I just know you're not alone, so many people struggle with acne. Ok there, it's and you're not alone in this and you're gonna, get through it I think you're a door for funding this episode of anything goes love door dash, it's a huge huge stable. For me, I've always been a fan of ordering food since it became an option, but especially recently, I've been loving ordering food just because been feeling a little bit lazy and being able to any dish I want to live to my door. There's no not to be doing it. This is the best thing for her We ve always counted on restaurants, to give us good food to take care of us, but now restaurants are counting on us.
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code. Emma e M M aid for five dollars off your first order with doored ash. Thank you, doored Ashura, something's episode. I love your and I've been using all forever. Somebody said how do I get over somebody when we never actually dated, especially when it, you think you in my day one day, but I know it's better for me to just move on. I mean I don't think there is anything wrong with, Being kind of love as somebody that you don't necessarily or not dating at the moment or that you don't have anything going on at the moment. I mean it's so normal and I think that its hard to leg, troll your mind if you're into somebody you're into somebody, it's really hard to turn that off. I think something you could do. If you want, is you don't talk to new people? Make new friends talk to someone. Will you think his cue leg try to find somebody knew that you feel egg is, a seamless thing
you know what I mean where it's like you're, not fighting for their attention or you're, not fighting for them to leg you back. like find somebody who it'll be patient takes time it a lot of time, but put yourselves turn try to find somebody to take up tickets base which, with their kind of talked earlier, but also its hard to control that so you can't control that in your you know,. And you can't turn that feeling off. You know don't be hard on yourself. It'll pass either it'll pass or you start ordaining. So who knows right be patient with yourself. dont, be mountaineers, offer filling whether you feel somebody wants. Vice on how to handle situations with your parents. When you don't agree with them. She says my dad. She My dad and I are very strong opinions that are opposite, which has arguing a lot. I think that there is something to be said for not talking about things that you disagree like avoiding those topics. You know what I mean. I know it might seem hard. Sometimes when
they're, like maybe relevant, topics that are either going on in the world right now or their something's something's really personal to you. I would say that avoids. Topix and maybe have a conversation with your parents and be like hey. I don't really think it's healthy for us to talk about X, Y and Z. Maybe we just avoid those topics all together and agree not to bring those things up, because it's really detrimental to a relationship and its really sick to be around you don't need to talk about everything with everyone. I I've had topics that I've disagreed with people about my friends, physically or friends in the past, and I've just made it. My priority is: never have those conversations of those people because it just doesn't get me anywhere. You know I mean it doesn't get you anywhere talk about something else and avoid those topics. If it's something that's unavoidable, then I think-
words like something that you have to talk about, have a conversation being like. Can we both put our egos aside here in agree to disagree on this. We're both obviously stuck in our ways here now us our budging. So can we just find a way to agree to disagree and respect each other's opinions because you're, my parents and I use parents, but were also human, and we don't need to agree on everything, but we do need to respect each other and I think, if you guys can find a way to respect each other's opinions and put your egos aside, you will get through it. Ok, next one, my boyfriend, I have been having little issues and for a while, we are all good and being in quarantine, definitely is in helping, but as of right now, my main issues me feeling and certain I feel like he just now so much about me and compared to that he doesn't know much. I tried it. questions to no more like what you
the song any get suspicious, don't get me wrong. We of love each other, but he gets so defensive. Ok, I'm gonna. Getting from this is that you and your boyfriend. Have some tension going on there's a little bit of tension between you, two that makes you feel uncomfortable and makes you feel uncertain, and you feel, like you guys, don't leaves a super close bonded relationship with its I'll say to me that you guys actually are more dating without a friendship element. I think that a really important part of dating in something I've realised through my experience is that the best and most healthy relationships come one your best friends with your partner right when you hang out with the person that you're dating in a way, like your best friends, but then obviously leg there
like an element of affection there, that's different, but one like you, hang out and talk to your significant other leg, you and your friend and light you tell them everything and you share things with them right leg. You show your. What songs with them. You share all those saves the things I think that that's the groundwork. That's right word for a healthy relationship. Sounds to me. You guys, maybe don't have that friendship element in its more just of you will were dating and we love each other, but we don't actually have of friendship. You know like outside of our leg relationship This that is normal. You know something I've I've been in relationships where I've just kind of like been. Just like a kind of a listener didn't really add much I've
I actually one of the relationships I've been in that comes to mind. I don't think the other person knew anything about me to be completely honest, like I genuinely I think they ever asked, and I don't think I feel, save to tell them like I just was like I almost felling, we work close enough in a sense. For me too, like talk about things that I was interested in or talk about things that I like these, I felt like we just Justinian have that leg friendship found should where I felt safe to share those things about me and vice versa. It was almost like when I was dating. This prisoner was like but we were just kind of like going through the motions of being in a relationship. But we didn't really have any sort of deeper connection. If really shallow innocence. I think that Croatia needs to be had with your boyfriend, where you say I've thought about this a lot and I think the reason why we
have these little issues is because I dont think we we really ever spent time getting know each other and getting comfortable. Telling each other about who we really are. Unlike what we're all I know that I think that that would be really beneficial. If we, you know kind of started over in a sense in like really got to know it other and moving forward talk to each other. Like we're friends, you know like were each other's friend if this isn't working out this, isn't it might just not be the one for you which is ok, and you know something. comes the little issues that all build up, are a sign that the relations It is not maybe men to be. You know not me. That's a tough pill to swallow. I've been released sir. I knew that mean the person I was dating just warrant really meant to you together, and it was just there was too many little problems in.
they all added up and we just work good together, but at the same time it doesn't mean I didn't love them. You know I still loved them equally, as much I knew deep down that it wasn't right, but I kept fighting for it because I thought that there would be a way to fix it. some relationships are just not meant to be you're. Just you dont. Have you don't click that way with somebody? I also think it's hard to know that until you felt it like, I never knew a while. You can actually be best friends with somebody that you're dating, but that is totally possible in exactly how it should be, where you, tell them everything in its fun in its chill, when you guys have a really understanding- and you know everything about them and like that is possible, but also, the other option is possible, but the other option never really leads to something. That's long, lasting and healthy. I think it can create kind of a division when you don't feel like you have a deep understanding of your partner.
you know. So I would say there have a conversation saying we need to start over or. Maybe right it out and see if you can make it work and have not been hit the road and find someone new he next one. Somebody said I needed vice: what's a good diet, amnesty you're there I am going to stop you right there and say never gonna die, never go on a diet. Please. I, it's are very toxic. Ok, I've done it it. It doesn't work long term, ok and it can cause so many. So many other issues mentally. That can be really detrimental. It can become really obsessive eagerly obsessed with falling the rule. Of a diet, you can get really obsessed with. You know, making
that everything you're eating is perfect in that can lead to some bad things, for your mental health and it can lead to eating disorders that are awful. Okay, so don't ever going to die. That's my recommendation. I absolute anti diet. I always have been. I mean ashes, untrue, there's a true. What I have tried going on diets before and I've seen what it does. It's not good. It's fucked up my head and not healthy is not a healthy thing to do, and it never is important long term, because then I go on said diet for a little bit and unlike oh my god, I can't do this any more I need to live my life and then I go back and then it just never ends up it. Actually, I end up going back to worse habits and add before here's. What I want to tell you, there's no need.
gonna die it have fun with it dies are not fund. The word diet to me is not a fun worked. The word exploring new foods, that's a sense, but exploring new foods. Recipes, finding cool alternatives that are healthy right, like finding cool pasta, alternatives, finding cool pizza, crust alternatives like finding cool ways to cook vegetables, to make them taste good, finding fun, healthy snacks that you think are really good. Like changing your your habits and in doing little replacements of things that you know you already love in finding healthier
nutritious replacements for those things, that's the key. You know like just making small little changes and trying to replace some of the less nutritious things with more nutritious things and making that into a lifestyle thing right, like obviously you're fucking at a italian restaurant in your like, I want to eat a whole plate of what
fuck. I want do that shit if you like. Oh my god, I won't eat you, don't ever restrict yourself, but when it comes to day to day life when you're cooking for yourself at home, when you're making use of a lunch for worker school, those are the times when you you know, can make an effort to leg, choose things that have to have more nutritional value, and you know or more good for your body right, but don't ever, but dont think that, like because you're making those held each was at home that you can have something. That's maybe quota court, unhealthy right! You can still do that. It's just if you want to make a change in your life so that you can feel better right cause I mean eating healthy makes. You feel better. That's the number one! Most important thing and it's better for your body so that you know you can live a nice long, strong, healthy life or do your best to do so. That's
eating how these are important, but it's about making it fun, fining fun, new recipes only having healthy snacks in your house, you know not only but replacing you're on how these acts of your, how these knacks, so that year you no more inclined Grab something that's maybe again more nutritious, like it's those little habits, but please please please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please, please don't go on a diet, change your whole lifestyle. Instead, you know what I mean reroute, the way that you think about eating. You know in a way that's healthy, not obsessive and not putting pressure on yourself. You know nothing like. Oh my god. If I don't do this, if I don't eat this certain way, I'm going to be so mad at myself, like don't think like that. Think, like I'm going to make an effort
more nutritious things into replace a few of my unhealthy habits with healthier once said, amazing, first step and also laughing to say about this is educate yourself on what healthy eating means. You know what I mean maybe even talk to nutritionist and see how you can make little changes in your diet to make yourself feel better and have healthier habits. That's. you know or the unit author resources on mine that obviously are not necessarily specific to you. So take everything but the green assault, but educate yourself on all that you know and make sure- You are aware of something becomes toxic and obsessive, wondered when you're doing making this transition be honest with yourself about
you're being too hard on yourself in all that. Make sure that you are putting yourself some slack and land being patient with yourself and that journey moving on ok, this questions from a guy, which is the most amazing thing ever because they never, I mainly get questions from from girls, so. This is so fun to give a guy advice about girls. Oh my god. I wanted you all episode like that. Oh my god, how fine I'm writing it down, So it is not like super excited about that idea. I really am excited so all the boys listen there's if there are any ah m, which apparently, there are, which is fucking so called me, but if you're doing you listen get ready his soon, I'm gonna do an episode where I give you guys girl advice. I would love to
that I think every so fun I'm cause. I am. I am a girl, so I get it silly, I'm in that spot. So I can help you guys anyways question is, please don't use my name. I won't. I want how get a girl to know I'm interested without outright telling her ok. So number one is to be seen as respectful as possible right, so there's there's a really fine balance here, because, what to make sure you're being respectful of the girl and you're, not making your uncomfortable, of course. So you know. Although body language is important, it's important to keep the body language to a minimum. Rightly its there's a fine line between, like you know, what's, okay, what isn't when it comes to like you're having a conversation in you touch her hand or something like that's are really find. My MAC can be kind of scary because it can sometimes make the girl feel uncomfortable, and you know stuff like that. But
I think that a little bit of that as long as it's really respectful and friendly, it's not something that like is at all sexual or weird, as long as you're being respectful. I think that little things like that with body language can be important, like can be really, you know important an honour for me. If I'm talking to a guy and nay, you know give me a little nudge, friendly, nudge, innocent nudge, nothing weird like- and I am making this a very fine line, some making sure to be careful here with that. But you know something like really like innocent and playful that you, due to a friend like nothing, whatever that's a really big signed. A meeting of this kind might like me, because this kind of showing that he is interested in talking me with his body language and all of that. another thing you can do. Is you can make an effort in a room to talk to this girl right? So, let's go in a year and a party in there is like a bunch of girls around a bunch of guys around and you go up to her specific
can you talk to her you're like making an effort to have a conversation with her that's another one that I think is huge. Also like. I think that innocent compliments can be really cool leg. Obviously again it is a fine line with, what's you know, uncomfortable or maybe even sometimes kind of not tasteful verses tasteful, but I think like if you say like wow, you know your outfit called it air your hair. Look so good today, something that's innocent. You know. I think that that can be kind of sweet, and you know again it's friendly it something that you would also due to your friend, but I think making an effort to like compliment her that's how you feel you know, make an effort to communicate with her. Ensure that you want to talk to her and not other people write those are ways you can do it.
But I think that the number one thing is to just be really speck full of her in her space in her feelings towards you. Unlike all of that, I think that that's that's that's what will lead to. Hopefully, something really great between you two once she finds out that you are interested, but I mean there's also something to be said for you know you get to a point where you like this and so much it never heard, stimulate hey. I actually have feelings for you, although I never do that shit, I'm a little bitch when it comes to that. I literally not even I literally will even in relief ships I struggle with being like I like you a lot. The guy literally. I have a really hard time with that, so probably need to go to therapy for that one donor. happen there, but anyways. Ok! Next I've been going through a tough break up the vastly months he dummy over.
eggs after a year together and then slowly coming out of his life. By blocking me on every single social media platform, I never acted or responded now suddenly, dating a new girl who is the epitome of presented his legs, and I do not feel about it. It's a rebound or ease changes, a person. It haunts me how quickly he moved on especially to the specific girl I Oh, I know what this is like I've been through this. The thing is is what you have to remember is that everybody deals with a break up differently and you can't take it personal. You can't take it. How your ex significant other deals with the break up has nothing to do with you. Ok, that's how they want to deal with it
weathered stating somebody who just doesn't make sense for them or AIDS. You know getting with a lot of people really soon after the break up or its blocking you on every thing. There's nothing that you can do. You know what I mean the way that you are significant other deals with it or your acts with it it's their own journey, it's their own process. You might not agree with it, but to be honest, you're, better off, not looking at their stuff anymore, because the thing is the way that they deal with it has nothing to do with you, but when you're looking at all of it, it so easy to take a personal, be like you know, go, and so does not like you know this type of person yet like he left me for them, rightly that such an easy place for your mind to go, but you have to understand that you don't know what's going through there,
and who fucking knows what demons there dealing with and when why they're doing the things that they're doing that are out of character? I think that the best thing that you can do is immersed in your friendships, in your Hobbes in school work or your job or whatever thing keeps you occupied in block this person back in. Don't let yourself look at what they're doing anymore it's the hardest thing ever it so easy and weirdly ff. And like look and see. Oh, what's my doing rightly, it's really fun, but you have to stop because you're taking a personally its affecting you, know your you have yourself which is so normal and Don T matter yourself for letting for doing that, its very normal, but in order to stop that process,
you just can't see what they're doing anymore because he blocked you block him back. I mean I'm not a huge fan of the whole block thing. I've never done that, but because he did it I mean you. Might a blog and back so that you can't look him up. You can't see it anymore, you don't know what he's up to and surgery like fighting to new person to be excited about to like out there. You know I mean get out there and try to talk to new people either It's a little bit scary and see that you know what I'm moving on to the second, the you see yourself moving on that's when it's easier to see them move on, because you like what I'm doing a too. Dont over analyze and don't take it personally, although that's the worst advice ever because it's like impossible not to do that, but just take the steps to move on and not take a personal
I have so many good questions today that this episode mighty there be really longer- and I have to save these for another day. But so do you How do I know if I'm crushing on the idea of some one or the real person? Oh my god. I love this because I have totally liked people aided people because of the idea of them are not actually who they were thousand percent thousand percent. so normal. I think. The way to know is how well do you really know this person right leg? Do you know what they say? about when they're going to sleep at night, They do on the weekends Juno, what their relationship with their families like you things about them. How much do you know about this person today? Show weakness to you. Do you see their weak sides? Do you know what they're insecure about you know? What's a weakness for them. If the answer is no
You don't really know that much about them, except for that they have acute phase. You probably like the idea of them. I've. U dont, know that much about said person and you have a really out of friendship with them first or having spent time getting to know them, then the crutches probably the idea of them. The more time that you spend with somebody, the less likely you ever, on the idea of them, but I think a really important thing is being friends with somebody before you'd become in any way like romantic with them re like a view, our friends with them in kind of develop a friendship in a sense. It doesn't need to be like long wave, your friends if somebody for like a month and a half two months, three months, six months before you start like dating them.
You're gonna really figure out what you're in it for re like do. I just think that their cute, or do actually really like them as a person because You don't have the romantic element distracting you from how you truly feel about them right when you're, just friends says I being friends versus super fucking important, but Somebody said how to be more honest in a relationship, my boyfriend and I never really argued, and they want to talk to him about certain things. The bother me, but I don't know how to bring it up. I think that. I don't know you don't know anything about your relationship, but based on the fact that you don't really feel super comfortable, bringing up your problems with him. kind of tells me that he might be maybe a little judgmental Wrong about that, but I'm just guessing, ah m! Listen! The thing
is in a relationship. The worst thing you can do is be angry about something not tell them and then build up anger inside because that will eventually turn into something fifty times worse. You're gonna start acting finally around them. You're gonna start regime, seeing them when you're not around them, and it's going to create a toxic relationship. It so important to get everything out in the open and just talk about it and get it over with because it guarantees are you bring up these things, the sooner they you're gonna feel relief? And this the? U S can get back to being in a relationship There's no weird tension, things that you're thinking about the bother you right and if you bring it up and he is an understanding and doesn't want to work through it than he's a piece of shit period, so it's the hard and it's really scary, but bring it up. Billy I have some things that are bothering me. I want to make a big deal out of em, but I do want to just get them off my chest here I go and then just get into it
So is it, how do you say no to people you care about? I find myself Yes, everything because upset them. I've just recently grew out of this. I think the key is to make sure that you don't put yourself out in a sense to help others all the timely. Obviously it's it's good to help people or did you know, Sir yes when it makes sense, but if something doesn't make sense for you and you're. Just saying, as out of pity, do your friend of favor being like actually know because in a friendship, transparency and honesty is key, and so your friendship is gonna grow stronger. If you're honest, and you say no, I don't want to do this and hears. Why are now? I don't like level bubble bar that's gonna, be important. For
The longevity of your friendship, because similar to how you know the last question about not bringing problems in relationship. This can create kind hostility or from you and anger. If you who are always saying yes or you're, never bringing problems that can create anger within you. That you don't need to have that's unnecessary for you, so you can do this it's hard and it takes practice. But if you just start saying no and being honest with yourself, it will become a habit, I have so many more questions, but I've been recording for so long and I really want to go make myself breakfast so I'm gonna go, but I'm gonna do another by session soon. I still have left over questions that I haven't answered. Yet on that use for the next time. I do one of these.
I had so much fun, giving you his advice today. I hope you get leave is enjoyed listening. I hope you guys are having an amazing day, and I just want you all to know that I love you and I'm rooting for you and whatever you're dealing with you're going to fucking get through it. I can't believe I'm like inspirational that I just was never like that before, but suddenly I'm. Suddenly a little inspiration all done. I was gonna Bab anyway. I love you all enjoy the rest of your day evening morning whatever- and I will talk to you guys next week- love you guys so much