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How To Balance Happiness and Ambition | Twenty Percent Happier with Matthew Hepburn

2021-12-10

Check out this sneak peak into an episode of our new podcast Twenty Percent Happier, available exclusively in the Ten Percent Happier app

About Matthew Hepburn:

Matthew Hepburn is a straight shooting, clear thinking, and dedicated meditation teacher. His personal practice caught fire over the course of several extended meditation retreats and volunteering to teach buddhist meditation in prisons in his early twenties. 

Now he shares his love of contemplative practice with people on intensive silent retreats, through dedicated daily life practice as a core teacher at Cambridge Insight Meditation Center, and as the Editor of Mobile Content for Ten Percent Happier.

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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
This is the ten percent happier podcast, I'm Dyin Harris, hey, hey today, were tackling a question that has dogged me since the beginning of my contemplative career. If I get too happy we'll that kill my ambition, as some of you may have Herbie mentioned before my dad, who is a successful academic? and a bequeathed to me a motto. His motto was: the price of security is insecurity, which is fantastic thing to tell your children, but it does have a lot of truth to it. In order to achieve success in any sphere, don't we need some amount of plodding in planning and handling. Of course, it's very possible to take that too far. It if you do that you gotta, be stressed all the time in that run, down your resilience and make you less successful. So how do we strike a balance here? That is what today's episode is all about,
and this is not just any old episode. You're gonna get to hear ACE, meditation teacher Matthew, Hepburn work directly with a student who is struggling with this issue if you're a regular listener. You know I've been enthusiastically touting my colleague Matthews New Podcast, twenty percent happier, and yes, the basic premise is that he's trying to double the benefit that you get out of this show ten percent happier the idea of Matthews show twenty percent happier is that it's a place to hear real people trying to learn how to meditate or even people who ve been doing it for a long time, but still could use some guidance as we are good and then you're gonna hear these people as they struggle to apply their practice to the rest. Their life. You may remember we had Matthew as a guest on the show about a month ago to tell us about his new show up until now.
you ve only been able to hear little snippets of the wisdom bombs. That Matthew drops on twenty percent happier unless of course, you're subscriber to the EP. That's because the show is only available over on the ten percent happier up, but today, with a whole hog drop in entire episode of twenty percent happier right down this feed right here. So you get the whole experience in play episode. You hear Matthew talk with the meditator name Saeed, who is struggling to manage his own sense of vigilance as he continues to grow more and more successful in a fast paced media career, going to hear Matthew, give some practical advice tailored to his meditation practice. But we think that you going to find nuggets of wisdom that you can take away for yourself. It's a powerful, listen so without further ado. Here is the very first episode of twenty percent happier
the last time you had a restless night, mind spinning with anxious thoughts that feeling of being powerless to just relax, worried about what's lurking in your future. It's like it's a monster under the bed. When we were kids, We learn to deal with these monsters the best way we knew how we shut our eyes. We ran to the nearest grown up as adults. We found all sorts of ways to cope with our deepest anxieties. We drink, we get lost in our food. as we work too hard and sense will never run out of things to worry about. We can find ourselves perpetually bracing for the next big thing and that can lead to a pretty painful in a world. That's the case from Phronsie. He came to me for some advice on how to use this new meditation practice to understand the widows mom there might be driving him and whether they have two cats. I or my fear, the ETA me my son, I hear what you say is, I guess very my second.
turn all training of your body to like be ok, not even be ok with relish, unlike the good parts of things like the pleasure right, my fears I'll linger there to love. What's too long, our really tell me what is too long? No, like our like, be filler, really good, and ah, my dear, let's like savour this and then I'll, take that throughout the rest of my day and I'll, be feeling pleasure and then I'll get blindsided by something sides, minors, in a tough spot he's very ambitious and he's been working is up the ladder and a high stakes media job for a while now, but the thing is after talking with them explained how he's been using his fear as a way to meet the standards that he sets for himself at work. It's hard to reach your folks, essential if you're not thriving on the inside, no matter how well things are going externally, real happiness is gonna
mean out of reach when fear and anxiety of turned into a habit. The risk for side is that all end of realising its aspirations, without any of the fulfilment of funded given I wanted to see if I could find a new driving force for sites ambitions, the four genuine well being, as opposed to vigilance today on the show, we're gonna talk about the ways to move between driving. and thriving so that you can have a more balanced and successful life. This is twenty percent happier. Anathema terrier yes yeah, what's goin on your world, it that's what I like to do just start to select, get a feel for each others see how you doing was On with you,.
I'm thinking about design these expectations. Now of myself, I have been trying to make more consistent. more more a part of my life, but I like continuously fail it doing so, and those expectations are like Gmail to wake up, and the first thing I do is not pick up my phone I want to do less of that when I wake up in the morning and more like doing like a meditation and then I begin my day, but about half the time I feel like a fourteen year old kid and undue psych reaching for the things that make me feel go when I first wake up still yeah. But if I don't meditate at some point today at what point will the ill effects of that stuff?
drawing up so now MIKE worried about the year. He knows I hear more than anything the pressure around both on the aspirations, On one side and on the other side, the like, anticipating both the ill effects of not. meditating and then, like probably, and on projecting, I'm assuming here some guilt that comes from like. I didn't do the thing that I knew I should have done, and why Now my anxious and I gotta get back to the breathing thing. How close and I have a whole far out of my air, now you're, pretty close your verdict closely you just kind of summed up my whole mental self talk like. That is how I talk to my now. Those are then even beyond meditation is like damages the thing that I was supposed to do. I didn't get the thing right that are supposed to get right, so I just end up with
does the stress in the anxiety of dislike either anticipate something bad about to happen or like something bad did. Been, or even maybe something small did happen and dislike, putting a lot of pressure myself about like Why do I let it happen? What am I do differently yeah yeah, yeah yeah, what you always like, what we're like in the thick of it? Ok, so I really appreciate your just you're just really forthcoming, with back in actually what's goin on right off the bat and is so helpful in meditation teachers. I work for people to understand. Like you know, what is your mental talk like him? What what is it like in your inner worlds cause us it's not like I'm like.
boxing culture, a soccer contracted like see how your form is what's going on, you know, but one of the things that I hear is that the things that create and fuel the anxiety delight I gotta do this. I should have done this. I should be doing this is the same thing that you're using to help you do meditation and I'm sure, other things that are meant to reduce the anxiety diesel I'm SAM yeah yeah. I know it's that same hyper let mindset doings. re way and is being on top your game right, like it's that sort of mindset that allows me to be good at my job and get it my life, of whom is good as lamby, but it's also. saying that like hurts me yeah, I wish I could harness it
For good in my life and not this year, and it wasn't just so running wild and running free yeah. Yes, so as like what does come up when you imagine letting go here. Well,. when I think about letting go just like the idea of letting go the thing. The first thing that comes to my mind is that it is the most vulnerable place that I could be in when I think about even just like even just a simple is letting go of my stomach letting go, and this led me to hang yeah. It's been a process which is bracing next seismic thing to happen in my life, and so I can never feel Truly, I never feel truly like.
Like I'm just living tat. Your question when I let go it feels like I'm just waiting for the next best thing to happen, and I I would guess it like. You said A project of adult hood in your life many ways become to develop some control over you know, situations that are legitimately threatening enlighten whom big seismic shifts that totally destabilize. Things- and I Imagine that you actually have really developed a fair amount of influence. You know to create some stability in an good things in your life. Do you feel, like that's the case.
I know it's actually, but I dont know what emotionally add on experience in my body in that way, on everything still feels like its imperil. Everything still feels like it can be taken away. Nothing feels like worth anything Really I had its value because, like I know that the same thing it's driving me to achieve more, or a work harder or like do good work, but it's also the thing that link. does he think it is a really allow me to see whatever influence I do her And whatever accomplishment I have had like has a really hard time with acknowledging would have already attained, or that would d of letting go and not staying ready for the next seismic thing exactly it would be.
Believe me, it's like let go. Would this be like yeah, I'm The thing that I need now, like you, just the fact that it is possible that it could be taken away. It is enough for me to be like now like now. We're still were still in this fight. This is still invite. Yes, yes, yes, it feels a little This was, to be honest. It feels a little fills a little hopeless. I can hear that and I think it will feel hopeless, probably so long as it feels like a project. Of undoing a way that you have become the person that you are, that the mind has developed. You know these patterns and if it's a project of transit undo, You know from many of us? We just think about our history, what we ve inherited intergenerational,
culturally and the thought of trying to undo all that is like daunting is a question of like. Is it possible and like even if it was possible for a person to do that? Like do? I have, Why- and I who am I outside of that, like I don't know, their person is I know who I am right now but like like what is at issue is that person now scary to what I wanna do, is try and figure out a way together that
we can make a plan for you to just lean into the things that are naturally you that will help create some space around this pattern. So it's not running the show all the time and you feel like you get some reprieve. So the question I want to ask is: what do you do or how do you experience in your data day, regular life pleasure just like honest, simple but real pleasure? Your question pleasure. It's it's tough because examples on thinking of our things like they are like just pure pleasure.
there. They have pleasure in them, but they also bring a lot of stuff with it too, like I think. The first thing I came I was like is exercise quite weightlifting, but running is like everything else is falls away. All there is in front of you if it's running. What's in front of use the road, if its basketball, what's in front of you, is these other five people on the court and the net It's like I took up my mind out of one state of being and dislike plotted into another, and the only rules here are the ones that are present here on this court, whatever the rules of the corridor evenly the argument and all that shit. I gotta, if literally feel, like I'm an indifferent realm, and I those two things: bring me like a lot a lot of you're in that it does seem like a paradigm shift from like my normal life into like another dimension,
altogether. What one of the things that meditation is all about, is using attention like bringing are like full awareness to the process of living so that we learn from it is in many ways is as simple as that. What I have a hunch could be a really profound way. To start some serious momentum create in bigger gaps from when you feel totally oppressed by this mine state of like pressure pressure and all the rest. It is to really tune in to what it feels like for that pressure to loosen for their grip to loosen. What I think, will be amazing for used to have these moments where you feel pleasure in your life and then to pause- and
like lean to feeling it. You know, because of the trouble is like you gotta help me hit one year on IRAN, but you just our still moving through life? One stage to the next, tuning in going. This is what it feels like in the cells of my body. to be putting pressure on myself. you know, have everything together and as soon as you start turning your full interesting curiosity and attention to actually really enjoying an understanding and appreciating what it's like to depressurize. We start doing that Yo. Your body is gonna love that shit and it will just start to look for more opportunities to feed, That is a very natural way,
toward a kind of depression position, because we're beef and veal the benefit in real time, and it's like anything else is like the body realises that is pleasant and enjoyable, and then it like seeks it out more often and the trouble is when we're focused externally. We then get addicted to the things that bring us pleasure. We don't culture to taste for the like internal letting go of the staying addicted to making the pressure can't say all my fear. The ETA me my feet there is I hear what you say is, I guess very. My second sort of like internal, like training of your body, to be ok, not even Ok, what's a relish in, like the good parts of things like the pleasure right,
my fear, is all linger there too long. What's too long like an hour, it's only what is too long, no, like our, like all alike, fill a really good and on my gear, let's like savour this and then I'll. Take that throughout the rest of my day and I'll, be feeling pleasure of an obvious blindsided by something I think that's a real. You know the gentlemen fear that comes from your experience in the world and in the truth, at the end of the day, side is psych. It will be you who decides to put it to you tests, and you can't take on somebody's word or as a good idea, intellectually, that, like
lingering in a felt sense of well being I'll call, it is actually not gonna hinder you or set you up to get line cited the only way that you would end up, expire, using a world in which maybe it doesn't feel like that's. The case is, if you like, tested out and actually see it Ok, I'm try this out sound like I'm ready. Am I gonna get I cited and feel it out and it'll be an expert. Like maybe it'll go well, maybe it won't go well, but you right when you said like the intellectual level, is not gonna translate into some kind of emotional resolve, but one of the antidote to that kind of fear is to take
some time to vision for yourself to really envision what, the rising healthy success in your internal life, looks like in relationship to your external life. Because there is a strong link for you in your mind, right now between internal pressure and external results, and I wonder what would happen for you if you really took some time to envision like what's the inner worlds of ten years from now that I really want to be Not that I really want to see that I really want to experience sumptuous what comes up when I ask that question. Yes, a grey question: earthy yeah I've, I've! Actually
never pinpointed the dynamic of like internal whatever into external results like. yeah. I haven't I've, never dislike thought about. It is like a solitary thing that exist inside my body that doesn't necessarily need to be connected text on results, but when you said it. The first and they came to Mind- was a a flourishing, healthy, green garden with a waterfall and birds. Chirping and like it is watered, and it is, has everything it needs it is cared for and it doesn't need anything,
except for what's what it contains sides doing something incredibly vulnerable right now. This isn't his vigilance. Talking, say, It is believing in the possibility of a different way to live and having a clear vision for this may turn his meditation from a to do list item into something that will change. Just life so right now. What I want to do is to lean into this to immerse himself in this vision. So we can come back here whenever he needs what kind of plants are there they're, just like a lush bushes that are like dotted with pink flowers that the bushes naturally provide, but like it's mostly greenery were like that of
pink and red flowers, would he here? Ah I hereby chirping. I hear water gently running like a sort of like a stream that goes through it. I see. Yes, I see some. I see some birds like ducking their heads into the water to drink, because this is a healthy thing that they like in there joining it yeah and edges and its bright. Everything feels bright and everything this feels it feels like an if you like an ecosystem years ago, healthy ecosystem. That is just like taking care of itself.
when you think of this place, this possibility for your inner world You know some years from now and you think of the reality of what that would feel like or look like if you were living from that place. Is there a like a word or phrase that comes to mind? That represents that I think of the word abundant when I think of the word self, sufficient and thriving. I guess
The figures are think Irving Thriving is the feeling I think envisioning. This is potentially really powerful thing to do in your life. But what if that were really possible, would if that was really On the horizon, for you. now be amazing. I'll be amazing. I think it's really is I'm listening to you speak. And the difference between what you're saying now and the way that you talked about meditation right off the bat we started talking reflecting on this or envisioning
this possibility, sounds to me like a real pattern, interrupts from your typical internal mode. There totally- and one thing this interesting to me- is that all those other things that you ve been talking about loving to do, have all been pattern. Interrupts their reprieve there a break right, it's like you, go for a run and it's the relentless you, no pressure or anxious thinking, and so I have a thought first, that it would be interesting for you to make a daily practice of just remembering. The garden who has a pattern interrupts if you want to interrupt the pattern,
Nor do I do this through yeah, I'm I'm I'm I'm hundreds percent willingly give it a shot. yeah, I want no until I try, because. Yeah way offering something that to me as stands right now, even though its coming from me feels like a threat to the way out do things don't set these things up as antagonistic to each other. what I wish for use take this on. Try coming back to an reflecting on this beautiful vision that you developing as a possibility for yourself like where you could go and then, when you're done, you
like maybe set a timer and take like four minutes right and envision it and when you're done. Be on your grinds is grind season, be about your business. I go get through done you dont have to try and now hustle, because for good reason, the mind and the body or like now that works, and you know I'm not gonna, let that go and tell it doesnt work and I dont think you need to, but this is adding. in something else, and so don't set them up as opposed to each other, but just it's like dropping in something new and I'm curious to see where it goes and check out that fear. You know the fear comes up that, like it's gonna be it's gonna throw? You are for us going to keep you from being alert, recognise that when it's happening and it's not that it's
Be different era should go away or anything like that. Just know that that's the patenting nasty conditioning, that's the vigilance you try that this trial is to try to see what happens. in between sessions, say took some time for himself to trial what we talked about. Most students take a while to open up and be honest about how they really do not see. I'm tired, tired urban, tired, a lot lately.
Yeah. I found myself dreading the week Esther Day, because I knew it was going to be a lot of work and a lot of moving parts, and I had to take a moment to just feel very upset. I didn't sit there for too long. I just I just have to feel that I wonder: do you think that's related anyway, so the things that we talking about just around pressure anxiety or anything like that I mean- probably it was in anticipation of how much I know I'm about to give myself to this thing. then that turned into a low but of anxiety, but then Did some of the visualization surf that we talked about like acted that quite a few times since we last spoke actually and helped.
But I did think in the back my mind. The thing that always happens is I'll find a new thing that allows me to see things in new perspective, but then like something will happen, maybe I'll just forget it or like I'll get destroyed. did or work will become, intends again and I'll have to dislike, throw everything to the wayside in just focus on my work and then the magic, then I lose it, and then I'm searching for the next thing. The next thing that's gonna like give me that magic again, so that's annoying that sites like a thing that I fear happening there. This is something that happens. For all of us I mean, I could say, I've gone to the same thing. A lot of times like we learn some kind of mental health or contemplative tool, something like that and it really helps when its new and when its fresh and it's like
something about it being new and fresh, allows it to interrupt our patterns and then is kind of like the inner patterns like no one. to expect stealing no it's come in there like you, don't try use that exactly how our work is not going to work for you any more likely that thing. You, though, I was hoping that stupid. Now we don't it's not gonna work that is really down which it yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah, and it's like this house to me, like you got this custom you're in the like honeymoon phase with the latest
and here was workin now, but you like for how long reign for her yeah, but I'm curious in, do you imagine is possible and what would it take in your life for something to actually start to have like a consistent trend where this shifts I mean I wanted to be passive. All of it is the year yeah I get I'm having a hard time seeing what it looks like what that looks like consistently, but maybe maybe I'm already doing it. But I don't know if I have to imagine that there is a better version of what I'm already doing.
I would imagine that you are already doing it and yet from what I see in a working- the people there are a million factors that you know just affect as we fall into our patterns. How how many times are we going to have to fall back in and how far do we have to fall skins on our way towards not falling into the patterns, and it varies. One of the most important differentiators is just how much people get stuck in the delusion that they shouldn't fall back down into them and that its their personal fault, and when you have that kind of real nasty combination of like you feel on all up
you're. Not having that you know depressive cycle or anxious cycle or you're, not falling into that same pattern, whatever it is different from different people right and you have the delusion that's like, Well, I've been working on this my whole life, but I feel great now, unlike its never gonna happen again because, like I got everything together and you know ass a really attractive, hope,
to fall into, but is usually not the most realistic right? And then people see the pattern itself, not assuming this condition by culture by family situation by circumstance by all these things, but when they fall back when they see it as both a huge surprise- and it's like it's, my personal failing, you know in the meditation practice that I've learned more than anything it's about developing a kind of wakeful awareness that accompanies you all the time. yeah like a lot of the time tat, I am like, I feel like I'm on autopilot, and I'm just like for so many reasons.
Like I'm on autopilot- and that, I think is because I quite frankly, I think it's because I helped me actually get through a lot of dramatic things of my past because, like if you're just on autopilot you're, just like not allowing you're not like engaged with the world and for a few minutes, and then it has like less impact on you if things that you're seeing in front of you are like really fucked up. My buildings at your are happening right in front of your eyes, are really messed up, you're, not engaging with the there's, an impact you as much maybe does subconsciously but like for the meantime. It doesn't impact you as much. I think that's maybe like why, that
auto pilot thing has resonated with me for years now, but is so important to recognise that, like just being on, autopilot, has helped significantly to deal with having to live through or sea or experience, traumatic stuff, and it really does, and when our nervous system learns that we're safe through that. It's not the right thing to do to try and just Change it all together incompletely strip away being on autopilot aside, you know, as a passenger on a plane. I want my captain to be awake and aware, but. if their flying the plan in their awaken aware, I do want them to also have auto pilot available, because sometimes ship goes down in his subject goes down and they need to, like you know, step
for a second is good that its there I feel protected. I being available right, misery in the ideal. Is that No, they switch between the modes as much as is necessary are useful, but when we ve learned a pattern of staying on autopilot, then you, Can't just swing all the way to the other direction, so there is a practice or a technique of developing. war, wakefulness more awareness is called population and population. Imagine you know like the swinging of like a grandfather clause or something like that. What we do is we stay in our comfort zone. which may be like being on autopilot right and then we move over To being really aware for a very short period of time, and then you just let yourself go back on autopilot.
and when you are ready. You swing back for a few moments and then you switch back and that actually tends to be a much a kind of stronger insist, more sustainable way to do these types of practices are becoming more aware, and so I wonder if, with your temperament, also meditation when it's not something, that's just replacing the thoughts that you ve got going at a given moment. There's lots of meditation said, I think, a really useful and probably will continue to be very useful for you when you replacing your inner thought stream with a different thought stream, for instance, or visualization, for instance, but there's some types of meditation instruction and they'll. Just you know tell you to be open and aware of everything, you're feeling enough in your body and everything you think and all of that stuff, and I would guess that that stuff is going to feel really
you're, going to feel, like you know times when its working but times one like the mine just totally bells, and oh you definitely so I think there's some pendulation, that's actually needed. That could be useful for you, anytime, that you try. That kind of thing to go in with a personal approach, basically says: okay, I'm going to do this for a few seconds at a time and then I'm just going to relax and chill out then Imma do this for a few more seconds at a time, then I'm going to relax and chill out So that is less about like how much of this kind you and door and much more about how much do you just want to do it you're a kindness, it better myself, I mean you think about it. It from my perspective.
The meditation teacher. Do I want people coming to meditation thinking about it as how much of this ethical, always on those some of those motivations? Like all right about the train, my mind, I am about to be the rocky of meditation, unlike go in and I thought, if you feel unlike Rocky, that morning, like great go out like the right, but if you're not feel like rocky, then that's not the mode. That's not! The approach could have I think, where ya think where I mess up is like when I start when it starts to feel like another pressure. That's when it's like not doing what is supposed to do. I think, you had something to say said that I thought was so in cipher about being honoured. Pilot am reminded me of a study that was done. They did this study with monks that
had done more than ten thousand hours of compassion practice and regular folks, and they took them, is to different groups and they exposed each group to these, like sounds of people in pain and misery, and they did brain scans on them throughout the process of them being exposed to this stuff. And what really fascinating, is that they found that for the ordinary group, the non compassion, meditated ass. They would have these big, Spikes early on when they first got exposed to these sounds of people in pain and then over time. The spikes would get less and less and less and less whom. Now the meditated is, their spikes would go high in the beginning and they would stay high all the way through
despite should actually be higher than the other folks who didn't meditate, as if it was more affecting to them to hear these painful expression from people. Nor what was really fascinates me is that the Mediterranean woods, pike and then immediately come back down to their normal level, their normal baseline, whereas the other folks warrant peeking, but over time their overall activation level was just getting higher and higher and higher, and so they will actually be able to come down from the peaks, And so that to me, was this, like amazing, aha moment of understanding how, when people are training in being fallen, aware and not on autopilot
way, more sensitive to the world around them near. But it doesn't hang with them and trouble them through the rest of their. day the rest of their life at sunrise. Actually, it just comes in and then they can move on with interesting to, because what they're also signing up for is when you sign up for feeling things all the things when it happens and put it off, you'll be signing up for whatever right you're signing up for feeling literally anything but, like I think, working in somewhat of a corporate getting somewhere where you're soda, like you saw her put should away in order to get shit done, they could feel dangerous to like exists in those spaces that you can feel dangerous to exist in a space like a corporate setting and feel like I'm going to be. A person feels everything all the time, because
that can inhibit your work. It could feel like it slung the process down. People may not have enough time to like may space for that you could use be, the weird guy, who feels everything like I find that in like artistic spaces that was acceptable. Even It was like not explicit permission given it was like implied and end. The spaces are Aachen,. I now this not really realistic, yeah, oh, my god, I mean I can't I can really relate how long did it take you d think to develop their balance. Well, Joe. Let me just say first and foremost, I'm not done not done and as Rapporteur is over. I think that after about
four years of real intensive five years of war of really like going for, I am making this a priority, whom I probably made like. Three or four, like very memorable mistakes, around figuring out this balance of power, in two wound up around work or to open at work, as you know, It's a cease, also go back and forth, but like I made some serious mistakes in both directions, but ultimately is worth it to me because of where I've seen that I've got to an end. I hope that it goes even further and further, because I say to this day sometimes I'll have a really tender meditation session or really intense there be set. I gotta go into work and it feels like. Why is it? Can I
go into this meeting in, like you know, talk to six people about all that things that were behind deadline on you like in my feelings around this not easy, but as possible, but who yeah yeah rights, those That is something that I want for myself. I want to be able to strike the right that balance, because I know where my work looks like when I am rested and I have space. I feel balanced and an order looks like when I feel stressed and hurried and an panicky, but I think the work that I have front of me, isn't knowing that you know the deadlines are a little bit more strict now but like how can I still like create an ecosystem for myself under these circumstances that, like a laugh,
some of that balance that I had when the deadline to warrant so strict thats. The hope that I have right now, I guess, is like China is one I'm dreaming or what I'm envisioning right now, yeah really taking time to stop and like breathe and decide not be so go. oh go really really all I'd. Never. Actually I never regretted it's always hard for me to get into it, but I never regret it afterwards. I will soon it's hard, remember to do that on your own home, but we're social creatures, and so what I see is that people who want to do something to take like little small moments throughout the day, whether its pausing to breathe or whether a site gratitude or something like that. The game changer is like having a squad. Even if it's like a score,
two and as you and one other person, that's actually the guy Changer, oh and I never thought about. That is really really the think. Then it doesnt become up. So no battle is not another personal thing to achieve its Ike, are you communion with people who you are already close to and so I would suggest if you think, that's site the thing that will help you the most this week. Take a little time to reflect on, like who else in your life would really benefit from that and would be down to just be honoured, consistent text thread with, you and you can just. I call for a pause and breathe moment with the text, and you know gas each other out for taking the time. I already know already know who would be doubtful. Definitely that, as is a great idea, that's a great idea meditation as a team. Sport
People look at it that way but like if it's not it's just impossible to keep a gone. So I would like to be a hundred percent behind you with those psych pause and breathe for a few moments, but guess somebody else on your team. Yo Yo, whatever you do that now. I am now you're my meditation homey when people like you, no about yes or no, but my home, humanity, you got it, you report me all you gotta do the thing now, if you're gonna claim to have a meditation home, you gotta be about your your pauses, I also thank you so much
Both tomes women doing very like this and came over like this, a good sign, big thanks to Matthew, Heparin and the whole team over at twenty percent happier for coming over and playing in our sandbox for a day. We hope you'll do that again soon and we hope that you, dear listener enjoyed this episode, their plenty more to check out over on the ten percent happier app right now. There are three more episodes waiting there for you and more coming. Every Wednesday, just a reminder, despite the fact that we gave you a full tasted, a show in our path Gaspe today to listen to twenty percent happier on the regular you ve got a download the ten percent happier app wherever you get your absent and open it up and tap on. The pot casts tab at the bottom of the screen.
I will see you back here on Monday with without fascinating wide, ranging conversation with the renowned buddhist teacher and author Robert Thurman. This is a good one. Sort of ahead spinning Wanna times so what on Monday for that and meantime have a great weakened.
Transcript generated on 2021-12-10.