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Bugle 4149 - William The Bonquerer


Andy is joined by Nato Green and Tiff Stevenson to find out WHO, what and where is going on. Plus, French ejector seat news.

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The Bugle is hosted this week by:

Andy Zaltzman

Nato Green

Tiff Stevenson

And produced by Chris Skinner. FUB.

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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
The Bugle Audio Newspaper, a visual world lockdown day, two thousand nine hundred and seventy three Britain is now one long queue with seventy million people shuffling around two meters about, although no one can remember what that queuing for any more Europe is swamped with South America and the italian rebel strong Odin. The northern Andy's is threatening the danish capital of lemme whilst Gary were swimming around on the Beach Copacabana Beechnut Skimpy underpants Bolivia. is revelling in its new arrive coastlines and islands, while Greece is convincing itself have been, landlocked is ok once you get used to it. In America, Emperor
Trump and his fears, storm troop was brutally repressed. Dissenting voices leaving a population of only eight thousand deliriously ecstatic, lunatics and Fox NEWS. Canada. Now Do over half a billion people has accelerated its global warming scheme to make Baffin Island perfectly habitable New Zealand. has invaded Norway and vice versa, just to give themselves something to do and in of London, and these? someone is still self isolating interweaving of cost and myself have twenty four seven. Thirty, six five living off the sweet nutrition of his own lies. Sorry I'll keep having these awful flesh forwards with its brief, traumatic stress our. Where are we? Yes? It's the bugle issue. four thousand one hundred and forty nine demand results when it is the seventeenth of April to G20 as us. So seldom been the case in history and I'm coming to live from us. its joining may not from sheds in London tip
Stephen certain from San Francisco NATO grain hollow both of you have, I hear ready, NATO house how things on the West Coast great after I mean look, I don't That's what I'm telling myself I haven't left my house. In six weeks, I've been there have been more than half block away so who knows what, happening outside of my neighbour. At this. I am I I'm shaving my own ahead with a beard trimmer and outside of my neighborhood. It could be a full on mad backs health Gabe, or like a nonstop worldwide Tea Party resurrected, David Bowe Concert and, like I choose to believe the ladder. but I'm seething with rage. I'm I'm ready for revolution, I'm spending a lot of time and in meetings on Zoom and and when this is over, I'm am allowed to go outside. I want to come
swarming out of the mountains like, like a gorilla soldier. My loved ones have been column, Commandante zoomed about give our that directive, however, Have you been here in London when you must be Edu anywhere in the world, given that you are not my house, I too Well, I mean North London very, very different to south. London actually know Andy we're not running out of yeast here, because I may have mentioned this before, and it is a family podcast bats. due to my being a top heavy person. Jury the hot summer I get boys known as athletes. Foot tit
so effectively. I have my own starts with me all times. I care I can knock out a fantastic soured, a moment's notice, so I'm self sustaining is what I'm sorry. Maybe we could make this a neutron action and in the vehicle merchandise tiered. We can talk about this or any other for another tape, bread for the masses, we're according on the seventeenth of April and today is apparently international Haiku Day day to appreciate the year jack. These form of micro poetry- and we have a few bugle high cues for you? who today pay. in a line, four hallucinogenic leaves. It is a I q J
found in failed greets, am I six gadget maker with words I Q bout nuclear flame his implement shouts, take a hike q private myself Fatima? exhausted about that that's tranche of Should we call a comedy, let's not bats, appreciation day a day to appreciates bats, We know, tourists Lee, indecisive creature will not in my house. Way and miles? We do not recognise that bats were sent to this earth by gods. To save us saw mixing up with east at that appreciation, then he's always forget, but still the bat deserves now appreciation from our species. The unloved evolutionary boasted of the third and the amber,
Malta, is this your bogus dangling rodent by a mammal way above Adobe Fucking, both as always someone emphasise a section of a bugle is going straight in the Bin this week we ask what what d cultural and historical, great figures, a history of Dublin in lockdown and wisdom. extensive research for you here at the bugle with Dust covered Rembrandt's these celebrity portrayed painter. What are you painted loads of pictures of himself interest Faced with the old, hidden easel picture of his wife, getting into above earnest, rather foot, science we eat just most around his house. Splitting things than sitting morosely honest surfacing, though, is not lost when it so big Michelangelo, would have finally got round to decorating his own house. Whilst gang his car and would have got very, very claustrophobic indeed and said- are just don't feel like me any more before spending seventy two hours straight on tinder, swiping, right
stone would have watched all the star wars movies and said the word bullshit at least thirty times, but our and your happy Verde would have written a hard coal pornographic opera just to see if it could be done, show Spare, while he would have finally tried to master the Limerick and then act out some scripts for low grade Hollywood, comedy films, don't cross dressing and long lost, surprise, siblings and Catherine. The great work has been watching Youtube videos on how to do. Dressage myself on the wrong side of the horse oldest son, Also in the Bin part two of your beagle homes go history. Exam now ass we were began. Homes go history, exam, an icy, that old eubulus with children have put the questions to your kids but now with question five writer: hope he hardly famously wrote as writers so often do and one of the things he famously roads worst famously. Writing was that the past is a different country. He of course mended. The food was weird
spoken, funny sounding languages, some things cost more, but some things cost less and it was a good I used to have an affair without getting caught, applause you're always relief to get back home after visiting but have helped he was right in the past is indeed a foreign country. Given the increasing ten trend of populist insularity in global politics and the prevalence of people amongst carogne of ours victims. Is it time to and everyone from history. Back to the past question six history: is notoriously full of absolute note Dan everyone you ve ever heard of a living dead, make a mark next to the name if they are a total one point or a bit of a half a point calculated whether or not on average Eleanor in history? Pro rata than there are today that question seven, it's a well known, fact that ninety eight percent of all historical tv documentaries are completely made up, but If you have any of the following documentaries covers a genuine bit of history, William bunker how the battle of
driven by fervent desire to go down in history as the eleventh century, most prolific, shag, Meister, based on our recently discovered and very x rated tapestry when chick conquered Rome, and You have joined feral chickens rampaged across the increasingly fractious european celebrity empire in the two hundred fifties, idee defeating the eighth legion, at what became known as the battle of the eggs documentary about a genuine peace of history, Jesus Christ, the garden send two years. New evidence has come to light that Jesus, the professional Messiah might spend three is holding his miracle, making skills working. In a garden centre. Bring dead, shrubs back to life, turning water into fertilizer and settings fish sandwiches with hardly any feeling at a seriously profit boasting market. Darwin Turtle, Slyer, fairly self explanatory and Mark on the moon, how NEO strong smuggled his pet cat Eisenhower into the APOLLO eleven rocket and onto the search the moon. So you have to tell us which of
it was based on a real event. If any and finally question H my last question in your bugle. I'm schooling, history, exam which historical event will happen, exam a hundred years from now Is it going to put up a home with your children? Andy something, and then it's been fine so far, but we ve had two weeks of school holidays. The days have just most into a formless nothingness, and on Monday we go. We go back the skill one damn I think I'm gonna try summer victorian schooling tactics, YO gets get a bit old school on it, better, but the old Oliver I mean, maybe not a full kind. But sir, you may I think point of education in Britain has always been to psychologically break children. Make them pliable adults for the exploitation of the states ought, I think, that's already the responsibility of us home cooling parents right now. What what about you? How have you been getting Whitworth?
Ok, I have eleven year old twins and the the way we're teaching them it. It possibly could not be more. your green on brand. I might Children are obviously fully bilingual in spanish and weave assigned them academic s es as eleven year old to read about the history of? U S: intervention in Honduras and its content since the migrant crisis and what them did a Powerpoint presentation for the entire family, about the history of pandemics and so has been coping. The anxiety of of social isolation and and locked down, that we are living through by reminding us periodically that this does not compared to the plague of Justinian Thirty, five, forty one by forty to eighty that killed upwards of thirty billion people
So it is good to be reminded of the plague of Justinian. At times like this, when in doubt, job story. Now and again we are sticking with the well the only story really in the universe at them at the moment, and I M Willis Starr in America nights because some, I guess, p we'll still be arguing about what would have been the best way to deal with this crisis in YO thanks of years time. If I human still exist and be, history is still legal, then no or vice versa. But I think it is fair to protect the Donald Trump Strategy, for the growth of our crisis will not be held up as the model I still have done the circumstances. Gold standard any more than that guy's effort, the break dwell marathon record and an old diving suit was a few years ago. How have you right, Did your yo yo your much beloved
certainly the ship so far in this process as well so I'm me, Donald Trump is trying is trying to cope with the threat of the corona virus with with his usual toolbox? Do you know they say that that that every general fights the last war and in the case of Donald Trump, the last war is driving a porn star to sign in India, so I thought so It's it's it's a challenging, isn't it science creates a challenge for him like the heat doesn't believe anything he finds inconvenient and sign be damned Heath Trump famously, The sound of windmills cause cancer here I believe in existence of climate change, apes symptomatic transmission around a virus or the clearest so like some of the things that he's doing are like to defined the World Health Organization are make they make.
Makes sense from his worldview. You know he's worth according to his usual toolbox, a political strategies to see of a problem. That is not a matter although those responses light in the case, defending the World Health organization he's trying to fight fall guy to throw under the bus to blame for his mistakes and U S contribution to World Health Organization's about four hundred million dollars a year, and it put that in perspective. That's about half what might Bloomberg spent to win no states in the democratic, and it's a lot and and with all the competing prior priorities raising the country you, you know, you expect the UK like the US government to maintain such a costly expenditure and so to put that in perspective, That would amount to the EU s contribution to the World Health Organization per Annum is slightly more than the. U S: secret service has spent protecting Donald Trump to go. Go
so it's it's a high priority, but What's amazing, is that, like covered, does not give a shit about. Donald Trump Games like sites and power? collided and for once politics will lose. Oh you, Politicians want to try to focus group, it pulled. Has your messages, the court has economic go as a swing voter, would you be more likely to vote against covert nineteen if it was called a chinese virus b, Sixty nine bad AIDS They never go outside again Idas or he none of the above I love covered. I want to die. Of politics, can have their like they're talking points and logos and consultants and spin doctors and proxies, and they can double down and pivot and walked back and catch for this slogan and platform and swing voter and cork,
Did you see in donor base and stopping and fundraiser photo our baby kissing pie eating? It is all as useless in the face inexorable progression of infectious disease as sending me to a pants off dance off competition with chanting data, which is good for a laugh, but mostly sad and Harry sleep, I know the EAST D D funded the who, but can we be sure that Trump doesn't think the money is going to the guy right, bimbo wizard, so that we can be sure of anything these days we ought to be in mitigation for trouble. We must remember that, famously as a child he was by a radioactive part of shit, so there level of that machete Vanessa behaviour that we just have to expect
it is not so much a bridge over troubled waters, as I hippopotamus might have caesium, leaping out first into a crowded swimming pool, the White House issued a statement after his his announcement that withdrawing funding for the World Health Organization saying, basically accusing the world, health organization of mismanaging and covering up the crow. When Donald Trump is accusing you have mismanaging uncovering things up. The king of Saudi Arabia, having a papa you ve, rattle, your ass, you towards women, dropping off with blood drip. from its mouth haranguing you about how you are spoiling the peace and quiet of people to have an innocent picnic on the river bank before belgian. Loudly saying: better outlined in, and then saying I gotta go mother, my desserts running away only Aims- drawing recognises game Andy As I say I dont even know the the
American need the World Health Organization Because- and I trust is busy declaring national days of, to deal with corrode, I, you know, pray the spray away, These that's the catch rates of illegal, using but it, but also you know you ve, still got skin in the game there, because you ve got Bela Melinda gates to all they fund as much as the United Kingdom. I think something like two hundred million from Berlin Melinda Gates goes into the world with organization which is the same as our contribution. But what does it mean? Does it mean that if the DE funding happens that the world the World Health Organization, find a cure that America don't get to have I think it means that if the World Health Organization finds a cure, America gets to go and shoot the care of them. And yes, going with guns. First, ask questions later.
Studying the spread of the disease I did get slightly aroused when I learned that the percentage necessary to achieve hurt immunity was sixty nine percent because in the future soon come he technically I mean I don't understand, come he take. Clay overruled, can the federal government do that like state by state? Well, so I mean the you one one of them bewildering things about Donald Trump. Is that their, There has been a long and growing list of things that a politician can't do that. He manages to do, and That is what happens when you end up with a president, who is a an idiot, be com ITALY, corrupt and see prepared to illegally hijacked the entire apparatus of the state.
What's a good time So you everyday it. Sort of the what its revealing to me out to a large degree is like the sentimentality of liberals about politics that there's a lot of like. Can he do that? Well, I don't know he you just did that. So what you didn't do a whole idea, then, can we're like it's not fair. Is he allowed to see, need a whole house yeah we're looking for Fanis in a system where that is totally unfair. Also I mean to you important questions, and generally I mean, Just because I know the bugle hasn't international audience. Here's here's a general tip that if you are looking at America you're seeing something that seems confusing, it doesn't make any sense at all and you're like. Why is that? happening answer is always slavery. That's whatever like what
their there. Rachel disparities in the din dead, the death rate from covert. Why are the ones we are? How does the electoral college work wiser, so much gun violence, wife eighty percent of Americans obese. What is the big bang very wise, Donald Trump, the President? It's all slavery is the only answer to all of that. So the death. rate from corona. Viruses is disproportionately affecting black people, so, like Chicago friends. Is black people make up thirty percent of the population, but seventy percent of covert related deaths and desk alarming caused by slavery, instead of early with worn and representative, I Presley of Massachusetts Cholera collection a racial data uncovered- and I normally think that both of them are right about everything? But on this I couldn't disagree more because Europe is already mad, the cove, it is heard in the economy and people No, let's tell Donald Central part. Five good.
people on both sides- famous white supremacist trump. That covert kills People will see that as an upside like. Oh, I get it. help me my billionaire friends, fleece, the poor to fill their are. You know, clause artery hearts and all they'll kill black people where what is the problem with like this is the most mega that ever maggot. So if you want Republicans to take seriously the public health responses to cover that are necessary. Don't tell him it hurts black people tell them that it spreads through Sean Hannity Gaze and only kills white men over fifty who own vacation home mister and the only known cure is universal rent control, the effects the governors who ve paid for their mistress is to have abortions bill, gates. Toting funding for the World Health Organization during the World health crisis is dangerous as
it sounds, and also the organ Jason itself has tried as diplomatic as possible to tell trumped go himself the World Health Organization is undoubtedly not without its flaws being as it is an international organization involving a country's, be people and see diseases which are ready little shit that often do not behave. How you would ideally like them to behaved undoubtedly their will. We need to examine what world of organization thousand. How it works out of this crisis is because there is a need to examine what everything does an how everything works that's all I'm, especially after a crisis which is generally, we choose not to bother doing it, because it's generally a very expensive, quite annoying. Does my anyone look good or because it was written in the constitution tune in thirty years ago, or because God said it or one of one of those gets out, but this Jesse, to be about the worst possible thing that could be done
in this current global circumstance with the virus now threatening the poor nations of the world with potential catastrophe Andy when you said that the World Health Organisation involved people nations, these is I'd like a mental picture of like a u N Chick debate chamber with a bunch of microphones and play checkers, but just the diseases somehow instantiated debating each other? I would like the learned colleague from AIDS over there to the clap when I had to I've had been so much misinformation flying around, they have had to have, the busters page on the on the World Health Organization website. And I get about five He spoke messages die from like loose relatives,
telling me that is due to five g Let's have a really hope, ah said: I've had to like kind of go on and say like doing alcohol doesn't protect you against covered ninety, which five personally offensive and neither does having a hot bath it doesnt prevent corona virus. So I feel those three hours a day in the bath was them down in cocktails and watching Netflix have been Waste one would have been a lot of. Claims of love What might be described as quack cures- and I hear the people with teamed up with some of the earlier influential epidemiologists in the world to our special offer, which will either q you off all- provide you lifelong immunity to both covered your choice out of one of the following fictitious diseases disclaimer. This is all bullshit. You get your off covered as well as comes its triple syndrome refund It is further spoke Elysium Anti retail cycle, but disclosure dost, thou, dost, thou dost?
when those diseases is known in Spain, I block and spoiled by proximate gush hoopla and you'll be immune to all of those for life. If, Well as covered. All you have to do is not take a hot bath, not drink alcohol. These the ways to make sure you are immune, holder, domestic clause In your right hand, whilst urinating group ETA role, carrot in thirteen bites, spread evenly every two hours over a twenty four hour period than down a gallon of carrot juice. Once behalf a month for the next year in a bit sleep with your foot dangling Saudi go back in a bucket of squirrel milk and crossing drawing back of a free range mahogany treat mix it with alcohol, free whisky to form a paste and then marinate your toothbrush in those always that Michael you stay virus free, I should report one of the other quack years. The came across my personal facebook feed may be of interest to fans the bugle expanded cinematic universe.
Which is the recommendation, that one thing that can stop you from getting covered is half a glass of water because it will really. Sit down, I guess is the theory, and then your stomach assets will kill it. That was that was this that what was top told me in Facebook there's some Confusion hair of when you are when you are not allowed out of your house during locked down. This been some allegations that the police have been somewhat over zealous in their treatment of people have been been out and about how we can clear up a few areas of doubtful you here at the Beagle. If you are leaving the house, because you ve discovered a potential if the virus, after leaving some bread out of and overnight undergoing multi annual realizing tat was still disease need to run to the hospital to we share the news with some real research is like earn a film version of your own life. That is an exceptional reasons. To leave. Out of you are an assassin with a contract to fulfil that cannot be carried out over the internet. I'm afraid that is not a good enough reason.
two to leave the house. That is a job that can be delayed until a resumption, of normal society? If you are just wanting to Rome around checking on whether other people are leaving their houses unnecessarily, that is allowed you're allowed to do that. That is a loophole that a lot of people are exploiting if you need to Kate, you escaped pet serpent. No, you cannot leave the house I have to call your local government reptile location, squat, many them. Sadly, under funded, few fairly sudden urge to recreate the walk to work of renowned historical figure that is allowed and If you need to drive your car at extreme speed, for no reason that also allowed. Apparently, judging from the number of people who have been falling doing it in the roads name, I don't know whether they ve been abusing police have been so of abusing their them their sort of power in America
it's a bit hid in in Scotland, they were like of checking in people shopping baskets to make sure that what they bore were necessary purchases like a deemed essential purchases and told someone off a buying crisps, imbues outside in a place where boozy so like encouraged, also boost during lockdown is king necessary like more necessary than anything else like. I don't know how you delineate time unless it's by its the clock. I can start drinking wine now. There is article that in here where I live in the Bay area. Our consumption is up forty, Two percent, since the lockdown began they'll believe they ve all been reading. The same stories me that in a gang in the bar for three thousand drinking cartels meetings. You don't get it the ambition to some good NEWS around the corona Boris NATO you're. As always, the bugles sunny side of life correspondent
You found any any good news stories, some emerging from this site global chaos Yes, I have Andy there's some great covert news viruses has led to contained outbreak of clean air B. as of the lockdown? Cars are off, the roads and economic activity has ceased, and so air quality is the best it's been in decades for example, in LOS Angeles, on a good day before covered review a hike in standing on a hillside. Looking at the view towards the ocean was, gazing at a beautiful skyline through a veil of rice pudding, but now it's all clear, and so with the You know it's it's a weird choice that we have where on the one hand we have plague and the economic and social devastation plague response has caused, and on the other hand, we have pollution looming climate apocalypse, war for oil and the social health. consequences of car culture
and so now we have cars off the road. We have better air quality, it's like being stuck between Scylla. and is like, but I have come to realise that we don't talk enough about how, when Ulysses was caught, perilously between the six headed monster, Scylla and the insatiable whirlpool correct is this die above was fucking gorgeous, so there's that The other good news is, the burning man is cancelled. Right. I don't know how much the bugle international bodies knows about the burning man, but at the end of every summer, San Francisco, empties out and about so Five thousand people go to burning man, a pop up city. In the Black Rock Desert of Nevada, where it's a combination to free spirited, art party, lots of sex at all. traffic music and there's no money. It's all barter based and communal happening stroke?
Silicon Valley, libertarian fantasy land, it's kind of weird in that way, but because cancel the burners are famous for their creativity and they. Have been, emancipated from their otherwise all consuming supper activity of preparing burning man freed up like like some sort of mass deployment like a Polly, amorous, Molly Dosing Dunkirk to finally snare creative energies with at sea and craft projects to fill the void left by a functioning state hurting man. People are like act we building ventilators protective mass and hazmat suits for healthcare workers said of unicycle tuxedos made of dildos and sons rainwater, but that's a bit of covert good news. I would just like to point out sexist where's, burning woman festival
always thine Salem a few hundred years ago, have burning woman festival, I think was the most of the seventeenth and eighteenth century british virus news now and well. The o o great historical events have become a musical background. I think the british government's virus, anthem that will always bring surge of nostalgia, For these extraordinary times will be the members in the papers classic hit trip, stumble, unfold, which is essentially since we played before all briefings on maintenance, calendar meetings and actually met Hancock opened his mouth. To you. we have taken by home secretary. Motels some battles with mathematics. Oh you mean delors umbrage,
professor delors umbrage and one title, which is how I describe and Boris when they're together, well yeah, pretty can't read numbers correctly and thick I'm talking about testing as well and how many tests- and I just think, if covered nineteen tests were anything like means tests than this government will be king all over it. My uncle came out the other day and said we launched a new green batch for care. Is it you see this? He came patents is incredible that no one can answer the questions. Dominic Rob has like only authority of a supply teacher and a rough comprehensive. This always cause differently keyed when he leaves at the end of the day
and no one can give any answers on why they're not providing p p M Mack Hancock came out the other day and said we ve launched a new green batch for carers. Did you see this came out when what we ve done? Is we want to show that we acknowledge Carers Rawls? You know that not necessarily just doctors and nurses, but key work as carers in the homes as what we ve done. Is we ve got badge and is given p p a money not king badges like nor is it going to do the only public awareness, Badger one is one. This is Tory on board licence to swap one industry, irrespective of social distancing goes. I don't know it is a time for me between Trump the conservative government over to whose handling this was the most we're just put a placard up in place of the daily briefings going deeper. If public stayin we fought it, we don't have any answers, but will continue to behave as if the rules don't apply
to us yours, I'm faithfully government principle at all a briefing as was last week now was asked twice if she would apologise about the lack of firm protects workers, given to frontline workers and replied I'm sorry if people feel they have been failings so apologizing, not that they work failings. For those failings themselves, but apologizing people feeling for for the emotion to feel about the concept might have been failings, I mean in terms of abdicating responsibility that is a triple twisting. pike back somersault of a tariff manoeuvre. That is it. Proposal that the de facto prime minister this week has been a ninety nine year old Military veteran Captain Tom. More who undertook to do a response and walk now is approaching, is hundredth birth
and he placed a walk twenty five times around his garden, aiming to raise a hundred thousand pounds at the latest counties how over eighteen million pounds raised for the further, and I checks, because who needs taxes and m it. Sir, it's capture them ideas is genuine. Got a good news story in these these dark. Dark times and also showed how important context is because he is a ninety nine year old war veterans, these walked two and a half kilometers and become a national hero. Knife I did. The same lucky for even rice, ten million quit, let alone eighteen million, I'm something these nine year old war veterans, rubber overpaid. To be honest, if you're the vehicles,
Jeanne Correspondence, and you see also stepping into the spotless breach of the moment. They are because he's the thing what happened. When this that this war is a war, the Euro storing field men call naturally fight It is a war for science issues, a law ever. What do you do when you have this excess of testosterone? Sorry, when you ve, bought an excess of testosterone, as is most of the? U Fc guys. I first heard about it on, if allowed to mention, arrival, Podcast Jergens Podcast, and they were talking about five island, but I don't really understand it. I thought I'd need a male take on it, so I shouted just to clarify to fight fight. Ireland is an island you I see is setting up to host,
so it is not just a short and for Britain, Yes, I know one of us that, unlike like the Americans, trying to shoot the virus, we think we can look at the scout island is being sent out by the UFC so that so that they can continue fights fighting during a time of corona and I'm not ready to person to describe it. So I have score boyfriend explains a hang do you know? Why is the president of the? U S see a mixed martial arts cage by an organization tat some of the toughest guys on the planet against each other and brutal, combat.
guys. Are so tough, they convey an innocent man, horses value. This is actually the candy fighting violence is that they should just ten conduce like everybody else, but nor too tough for that these guys are harder than child Bronson under a pilot dorky. So Dana, why has brought an island? Can all go, live on it and fight with each other, and I didn't have to follow any looked at a distance and moves data will be the President Eddie Ireland as well. I know against it to be honest, imaginary, like an eel movie, presumably rich guys were big. Cigars will be on the fight and the eastern European on candy. What did I hang where blood splashes on in June the fight and they wipe it ass, a lick, their fingers
then the loser will get hunted to death by the rich guy's boss, Jean Claude Van Damme will come and kill them all I'll. Take all that money and I'll give it to the nurses, which is a good idea actually good on. You therefore, as old it does show, the endless resourcefulness evolve great species that no matter how bad things get. We will use God, given human ingenuity, to find a way of getting people to back the living shit out of each other for our entertainment, other sports in attempting to do similar to the to the USA's Fight island D, W Pbs, I Body world billions in sneaker are attempting to build a snoop came out. I fully functioning snoop arena and the culture of adornment underwater volcano in the Pacific. Sadly, this is not worked off. It proved impossible to keep the base cloth dry on the table since nuke tables, whilst under water and the place complained of the bulls moved differently to they do
underwater and sharks, Hitler of pudding non virus news now and NATO. You are a huge fan of people on necessarily ejecting themselves from fighting, so you fur news, but he knew intrigues this week. Yet so I've had stuck at home and and desperate for a laugh and this when I read this news story, it gave me genuine mirth and joy because laugh, get someone else being terrified trends this time space and culture of government investigation was just released about the incident that happened in France a year or so ago, a sixty year old Frenchman was given a gift by co workers of a ride in a fighter jet plain took off and the four the jet combined with, is overly loose seat. Straps. Let him too flowed from his seat. Terrified and panicked here
tat the grab onto something anything stable to steady himself and accurately grab the ejection handle and shot himself out of the plain where his parents, Lloyd and he landed in nearby field. Now To reiterate the flight in the Peter JET was a gift by co workers that did not want What do you accept that? Because he felt like he couldn't turn it down? Look we ve all done shit. We didn't want to do to get along at work, but usually it's just care and it's a karaoke at the office Christmas Party for bringing chips in depth to a goodbye party for that person that you never liked that much, but you make a go of it. What is this guy have on the line at his job? This is the story about someone shooting out of an airplane, but it's also a story about the savage exploitation of senior citizens in the workforce, who should be able to enjoy a pension and do old people shit like getting
at five in the morning, a Dane pots and pans and job we rather bathrobe, undoing crossword puzzles that's what abandon their sixties have earned from a life of bloody service. Let him reminisce about his glory days. In the midst seventies, doing coke and sea MILES, Davis live or whatever in a workplace. If you get if, as a gift, you get a true a trip in a fighter plane, the only acceptable responses are yes, I do want to shit my pants at four hundred metres or no go yourself. I'm sixty four just give me a bottle of scotch and call it a day. There's a good story to go home. How was your birthday dominant, accidently, ejected myself, my fight adjacent five hundred kilometres that could not realising didn't Well. That brings us to the end of this week. Serbia will thank you very much for listening. I hope you are keeping a safe, sir perky
mentally, is you can be in these circular is locked down. Times NATO to thank for much fora join me any anything's you'd like to plug in your occurrence online activities. I have two albums out that are available to be streamed, downloaded wherever you download and stream out comedy albums the NATO Green Party in the whiteness album, follow me on Twitter, at NATO, Green Mr Nato agreed on Instagram you can watch outright by Monday nights on Instagram life? Where you see at you have today NATO on. But where will you see Andy and various other bugle people and as for five comics on a Monday, so that's fine j. Now you can follow me on Twitter, active Stevenson, non instagram for the shows. Its chief Stevenson comic. Thank you. Buglers, we'll play you out now is traditional with some lies about our premium level voluntary subscribers. Until next week, goodbye
Paul Kane resents his unrelenting monosyllabic for names, surname combination and his face was jealous of Sri Lankans. I could say my name a hundred times in the time it takes some of them to say, there's once weeds bull who has we'll put in train a legal process to give himself as middle names Ella. Well, I can economic ones, kind of Syria and Leon around she logging following an awe, struck perusal of e multifarious volumes of Sri lankan test cricketers. Masood mirror Amity wonders whether dolphins, by repeats the seconds breakfast species. After without wishing to sound, arrogant us humans, see our species as an irritant blocking their way to the top of the rankings or inspiration to raise their game. The ever This concludes. My suit sadly suggests neither they just dick around in the sea hunting at each other rob offer quite apart.
From being a brief memo left for herself by british mythical enchantress Morgan Le Fay, before taking the scabbard from our brothers sort. Excalibur Rob author. Doesn't Think much of the whole of fury and Legend Stick. I reckon those nice guys will tools and I don't care how round the table was blasts, rob they. Estimates that silly little girl and didn't focus on infrastructure, educational, social services. They set mythical Britain back hundreds of years. Melinda has likes to make up corporate slogans amongst her motivational matters. Are you can't empty the bath if you ve concrete it over the plug hope it's time to put the a peace through the post. Folks, don't an octopus with a similar all made of salt and a fish finger in the hand is worth two full grown headaches in the sea. I'm government has attempted to work out exactly what Melinda slogans actually mean something the fishmonger one might be something about small, tangible achievements being preferable to large unrealized potential and the one about put.
Poppy through the Post box is about realizing when you cannot solve a problem yourself. Bring it on someone else. Instead, the end of this week lies.