Hey it's Michael all this week, the daily is revisiting our favorite episodes of the year listening back and then hearing what's happened since they first round today. Ella and her fears it's Tuesday December thirty. First, oh, what's that bought my Jane capture kind of dream catch, so I guess it like catch Bad dreams that hasn't been working so good. We had some bad dreams lately, yes, I've had some last night really. What did you or did you dream about last night? don't even really remember? I always at my dreams to I try sometimes to write them down, so I can remember them. Do you ever do that? No man, I'm still working on spelling so good to me,

That was probably really hard high. The same lack of about now is at last name. Maria above are Barbara. So why don't you try so gay for the New York Times as allies. This is the guy In addition today, we are talking about fears and how to face them. It's Sunday September, twenty nine. Hello Michael, hi. Is this Ella and as my mom talking, but now it's me is that Michael higher, Why are you wearing headphones? How does it feel growl and

my colleague, Julia Luxuriant travelled to Nashville Tennessee to record our conversation with Ella Minors and her mother Katy nurse. It shows a guy Yes, sir, are you calling me, sir? Yes, sir, you don't have to do that. I appreciated but faggot hurry you hear me do this. My group are not the microphone. I'm hearing uses a phone, but then eventually a lot of people are gonna, hear use of them I'll get you? I don't get it either. I thought that we might begin with just a couple: a really basic questions. How old are you I am. I just turn nine and sincere in Ella your bedroom. I wonder if you could describe a little bit of your surround. Things just a couple of things in that room. That mean something to you. body in here my

that, in my staff, fan lulls enjoyment those animals- I guy A year ago, clang name you and me, and by an israeli favorite watches by me. If she has a cd bonbon has obsessive compulsive disorder. Yes, sir, I mean yes Stella. I know that you have been through a lot this last year, so I wanted to talk about that with you and with your mom. Is that that sound fine? yeah. Let me surpassing you about your biggest fears, what are you most scared? the rolling toy, Ngos five years or even death Might there is an going upstairs my so far in the garage among those, because that's of fairness

fear is. What would you say are the biggest things at your most afraid of giving fault. Like flying? Nato's we have like twenty now watch is here in the worst thing, is I tornado NATO siren right beside our house, so can hear like war with corpses. That's just time. If, where her mind,

We have never had a tornado actually had our house. That's good! Yes, sir. Yes, obsessive compulsive disorder is not what I imagined it too. De I pictured mainly the compulsive side of OECD handwashing over and over checking locks are things like that and with Ella in particular, her OCD focuses more more. The obsession, obsessive thoughts of vomiting of tornadoes, Ellis compulsion is actually a voided. She will do anything to avoid the situations- where vomit tornado could happen I'll see? He is just sign. They're telling you day, scary things are gonna have can you it took what I had a fear of

aid to NATO's in just made that fear juice? enormous when I down there. I had OECD, I feel like it. Change life lie, how so higher for me to do a lot of deference staff that other people can do at least is harder. I feel like the first time. It wished gesture typical school day, and I get to the carpal line at school, and I drive up and instead of oil walking tar, car, her teacher dies and a kind of roll down the window, a little confused going like ok. Yours, and that when she told me element the classroom and, of course, of knowing What do you mean? She won't leave the classroom

and when I got to her classroom, she was literally just remember. I was like screaming on the floor and finally, that was done against their knees up church, barbies wrapped around her. She was tucked into a little ball and anguish, just lying on the floor and crying, and she was able to say like move, I think I'm gonna get sick or if I stand up I'm getting it said I am going to get sake. I'm gonna get their waste One thing I can stay: you're gonna, be ok, you know you're, not gonna get sick. I am going to get sick. I that helped her- I am gonna get saying she wishes star, I am getting at stake. I am her brain was dying. I'm going get sick. I on this one thought: I'm gonna get sitting Ella ways.

Basically paralyzed with her feet, and I ended up just having to literally polar off the floor and carrier to my car. I am getting at said. We do know that the things we were doing, the reassuring her. You know, you're, not gonna, get sick, those for really amplifying her of CD and the next thing that really pushed ice was the daily the phone call from the principle that tell me there had been just a routine tornado drill at school? How can you tell me what happened that day? Ellis com? outside. So I was learning to Jack. It's the tornado. Jail was at that end of the day, hearing the siren really just kind of set alight into bad state.

All consuming beer, Versailles, myself right now, I'm not gonna get sag. Do you kind of trying to talk yourself out of here and I didn't take the two coats off and it was like really hot inside and it was really think. Co only add to duck our heads down even now wish just Faye clearer to adjust Make sure we knew what to do What did you do and I went to live in a way that there had an like? Then in and I throw up. I mean when they told me it was like. Oh my gosh, like poor child. How much worse could give a debate NATO and it had to be vomit. It was her too,

worse still veered in one, and what did that experience due to your fears? Let's just meet the wires shrilly, these spheres gist. Comic consumed her. They kind of consumed her life there have their Zile boys that boy Navy for. Can you tell What kinds of things they would say. Somebody has said to me, like you, That good, as like other people, because you have OECD the trouble, I start crying. When you start to see her not be able to do the things that she's been able to do? Is when, as apparent ugo, ok, we ve really gotta get? Oh, yes, yes,

eyes that we had to do the hard way. What do you mean the hard way now was a king some sites? Do you want regular, yet love you. If you want to break, I would completely understand at daybreak were yet cover. Ok, we'll be right back, don't leave fry no shares trading is now available for all fidelity customers on the fidelity Mobile APP by you, Oxen, etiam, Commission, free, based on how much you want to spend instead of by the share fractional share quantities can be entered out to three desperately is as long as the value of the orders. At least one cent dollar base trades can be entered out too to decimal places

sell, orders are subject to Nextivity Assessment fee from zero dollars and one cents to zero dollars and three cents per one thousand dollars of principle. Fidelity brokerage serve. As a member, and why I see as Ipc. I'm Wendy Door and I'm an editor on the daily? For most, my adult life. I thought of the New York Times as edge I ain't news machine that spit out news stories all day, long kind of like a vending machine. And I'm embarrassed to say that it wasn't really until I came to work here at the times that I started to think about the reporters behind those news stories and what it takes to get the story. In the first place sometimes these reporters risked their lives. Sometimes they talk to us. Two in the morning, sometimes they call us from a war zone and nodded Do they tell us what's happening on the ground wherever they are, but they also give us the context that we need to understand it. If you like hearing These reporters every day, which I know I do the one thing

you can do to support them and the daily is to subscribe to the New York Times. If you'd like to do that, go to and why times dot com slash subscribe, tell them we already ready. Yet, Action? Okay, so once you determine that you have to do something guess what do you do my husband and I we just started researching. I did so treating Owen indeed, the best treatment options for Ed Allegest dead too much and came to the conclusion that Ella needed some intense therapy. So that's how we came across the fear, facer camp that they put on two times a summer fear for users. It is for Chile

In that to have obsessive, compulsive disorder or other anxiety disorders, it is line by the University of Florida and sorry L is making funny bases so based on the name. It sounds like this is a place where kids go to confront their fears. Yes, friend Nashville till gained, as you arrive, can you can you just go? tell me about what you first out when you heard about this this camp of fearful I was excited but nervous at the same time- and I was not ready for the drive the drive. Yes, a long drive. Do you remember where you played on the media when I say I love hearing emotional sunk, this

I don't know why, like God you're the reason jus I'm still Ray Sal, we gesture I'd friend, Nashville give the OECD as you arrive, can you can you describe what it looks like. Aristotle, Parking lots and it was-

and I spent a nightcap, you should just look it up. Ok, let me do them fear mixers cap, as there are a lot of photos there really are almost no phones. I can tell that was like a really nice place. It kind of like taking charge to me was the first thing that you did when you got there. I got to me I count Larry's, nay, nay, my OECD, o C, o C, and why did you do that, I'm just like that you give that OECD and name it helps the identify. Like ok. Is this me? think in or me being scared, or is this

city or in any case, as this see being scared and tat, tell me about it. I always just picture him thing like he's a bubble in time, my brain easily able bubble blue. It's blue cause pollution, my favorite color out no lie the y. Why know your favorite everything I know now is a final. Like, oh she's, a little bit a part of you like it's always gonna be yeah. There will always be there and here he is snaky sneaky ethnic. You how you don't know where he's going to tell me are she tells me I am going to get sent our regarding ingredients, the girl,

I say I'm not gonna get sick and knock. I get sick and that makes it worse groups or does not gonna get some sort of not gonna, get said the girl going to grow. So they tell me doctor Sea, like deaf right, but how I'll see you get their feed. I you can like. So yes, I investigate sake. Yes, I m gonna get sick. Yes in that light, Yes, I'm gonna get sick. I came down again I don't know how, by a defeats o c has it site just so Ellis OECD, could have a friend I named my C d, o Cinder, Addison, very light. Ok,

definitely have a little o in me. I check my stove at night. We have aghast stove and I always check, and I I can't just look at it. I have to feel- that's. A little lines are facing off because I want the pleasure of saying I told you sender in my mind, is just like violet. And mother character, I think it is right Can somebody write that down from Abby, who always has to have things a certain way in its very particular and picky. Just nagging pursue few friends again that's what they're cinder would be. Ella. Do you remember? We were sitting the basketball court. I am, he sat and we listed all of your fears.

Yeah. I can not really scared of TAN this sphere. Have I not to NATO's warm ducks buyers others and so eluded. The counsellors do after you told them about your fears. We We did on damages deadline we well, we we d, like exposure to them, exposing yourself to the thing that your most afraid of yes, yes, So at one point during the week during allies morning they tackle tornadoes baby,

bring me into a room that no by was an me and my mom. My councillors. They would bring now our pride and more their place on really strong. When was that

resting die watch was not too hard, and then I will not tell hard dog was running kind to turn it out. I was like now doggie stay here. They didn't take too long. I was like I would just take the dog to then after they just need to the Basque down played that NATO siren we re dead, like what happened likely. I got sick and click to jacket. Sighing me well, everybody's, like plan to codes, they really did try to create the situation at school to really kind of put her back in that moment when she was so fear,

well at school and have her see you can do there. I said, oh now, this is getting louder, louder, ass. He started talking to me version primary version. I guess TAT S azure stage by stage as there is no fear. We kept doing it over and over again and then just kept getting easier and easier, and then the expression whether they were like elsewhere. So after the first exposure, we moved to vomit and of course, as soon as we said that it was I've, got really big dislike. Wait here

they gonna do vomit, that's one of the really heartlands. Instead, they explain that we're gonna, watch a video and, of course her first response is like you, I don't know about I read it ended in. Do you mind if I plant. They showed me. The pitch, perfect started with a certain. Any sign was gonna happen, by the way- and I realize TAT carpet my heart. Races, renown, yeah, ruin yeah, I'm sorry, but I do want to stop doing this and they think I wanna keep going play. I in I opened my eyes. I saw the black nations

Out of her mouth so bad sick it's worth that I see says like you are going to your leg. Yes, yes, I am CS. I hope you run. I gave up army realise that it wasn't a scary, as you thought more times, I watched it, helped beggar, after we left the room with the Ipad, that is when we went to kitchen area and started the x. Measure of pretending to vomit up water. They can't meetings

think we got lying around vanilla spit it out. There would be kind of lightly do that, for you kind of pre pretended to be throwing. Yes, it was They were saying you know: ok Ella, one of you look to see if she got sick and then we moved on to the bath there and that's where everything got trickier. That definitely was hard. So these flourish, grab a handful of de really great jelly beans that you play like being booze all aware, so they tastes like format, core grass clipping or what nine- and I mean God bless these councillors, because they are the ones that eight, the jelly means not Ella Allegest had to lodge an they shoot a mob and man per day

did to vomit in the toy. One girl are almost actually trying to got said was gagging. I don't know if it was the taste of the jelly beams or if it was just gag reflex- that it really sounded like she got sick and that's when Allegest really lost it. We're saying you know: ok Ella, one of you look to see if she got sick and she did not want to look to see if she got sick. Now it asked me my rating, I said, I refuse to like login that's why you and I crying you, my mom was crying stepped out of the stall, because think my emotion was. Upsetting Ella more. He said this is too much.

Why should he sounds like you're starting to question this whole exposure thing? Yes, I had out. Did we make the right decision? Do a? Is this really gonna help her and yeah I remember being outside and just going like is. Is this how it's supposed to be and they were like? Yes, you know she's. This is hard. This is gonna, be a hard moment, for her, but she's gonna have a moment in their where she realizes she can do this. I was I wide eyed country. Can this is not fine? My mammals, like she's, not want to come back tomorrow. Ban wouldn't let me likely arms I had till. I do so they took picture when my mom's vowing, so they said. Ok, how about we take a picture and you look at the picture. Sure of inside I mean the toilet and

LE witten look at it at first and covered her eyes and they were like you know, Ella was trot a look at it. I looked at the picture inside the toilet. Page said she just come just stared at light made herself look at it and she just eventually to two steps and I looked inside there too. I actually looks out of the picture. He made me. I get wines airlines says it's like Mars, always outside the bathroom talking with one of the doctors, and we heard on light cheering inside just Ellis cancer, slightly going crazy in the bathroom ensue literally made like a tunnel for her to go through coming out in the bathroom, and we all like cheered and high five dear and the first thing she did,

was come over to me and give me a big hug. Nummies course. She's got you know like a red eyes and I was like you, what was it like? Interests lie? I was proud to myself, like I felt brave and heard her say that in a really long time, eyes out rarely guide after I did odds ease exposure is, I feel good. I shall happy thou brave as out everything really I'm always dad. You know we will sit with you in the bottom of the pet and we'll just get through it will get through it together and so point everybody's going to be at the bottom of the pit. You no one's life is perfect and I think the younger they are in Kin start learning to.

To be there and work themselves back up, I mean that's an sorry. Slut I might say worth it. I mean we ve got she's gonna, be making it all our. There are a lot of kids who have a seed. Why? There are also have kids who have major fears, even if they dont have a city, but most kids, go to a special camp to face their fears. So what would you say to a kid like that? What kind of advice would you give him or her? First, I would say I am an analogy alike, Stu kind of were ideal leg. Do like stray he's were you, I won't say yes, I am yes. I am kind of like that. Hopefully it will get bagger good Took away those fears now now, if you have these

here is now. How are they differ? as scare hell. I really enjoyed going in this constitution very much and you're. Very brief. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. And thank you. Thank you.

The last thing you want to do in your second track across the city. Looking for a doctor, thankfully, with one medical you can video chat, health care provider, whenever, wherever even if, that's at three a m from your couch UK. Tat with them, as often as you like at no Additional cost one medical who offers same day your next day, appointments at more than seventy five conveniently located offices nationwide. So if you like, the idea of hassle free primary care visit, one medical dot com to become a member, I live ran over I'm so glad to hear your voice. This is very magical for me to talk to you. I say I am, though I'm bag yeah we're ready for you. I got an hour and back

so Barbara you wrote in to the show after you heard Ellis peace. Can you say why you wanted to talk to our well? I listen to the daily every single day and when I heard your pack has TAT day, it made me cry, because I also have a lot of fears. Like you do. My fears are different than your fears, but, listening to you made me realize that I needed to get help as well, and so I did so. I wrote into the show, because I wanted them to How you, how much you're honest words met me Ben? Are you? How are you doing now?

I've been doing really dead. I'm not goin back a treatment by ah. Why, by I have brought to light there? Oh did you have any questions that you prepared for barber, what are you afraid, has now the types of things it I'm We scared of now Ella are mostly things that happened in the house, especially in the winter. Winner is very cold when it gets a loose euro, I'm very frightened of the heat going on up the electricity going up. I get really pretty

paralyzed with fear, and I feel very young, and I feel like I'm just very along with this terrible problem that feels like it's just too big for me to handle one one day my washing machine was breaking and in theory scared of mechanical appliances and when they break, I dont know how to fix anything and all of a sudden. They thought of you, and I should it's going to break exclaimed. Blake it's going to break and it did break, but they told me to take the step to call somebody who would come help me. I pray that can help deal. You know I don't have a lot of people that know about my fears. I haven't really told

the people, the naked, fits you just look at the time when you just didn't talk about these things. You just talked it inside and tried to with, as well as you could who in you know in your life, knows about this. I am I is about that. I now feel even your friends in your classroom at school, but they know about it too. I think that helps alert, yeah yeah. Sometimes you think an adult has a lot of courage, but sometimes you don't feel exactly the same as you and it needs to learn to me that you talk to prepare. I hope you have a wonderful holiday. You

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