« The Tony Robbins Podcast

How to find your light, even in the most unlikely places | Sharing the gift of joy

2019-12-29 | 🔗

Muriel was diagnosed with Alzheimer's in 2016. But when her daughter Dani hired a comedian to work regularly with her, her quality of life improved dramatically. Now Dani and a team of comedians are bringing this experience to other's with Alzheimer's disease and dementia.

You'll hear Dani's story of how laughter helps create joy for these patients – and the incredible effect that sharing the gift of joy has on the comedians themselves. You'll also hear from an incredible woman named Roz Clark, an opera singer that is providing classical performance opportunities to children in underserved communities – and helping others heal connect, and experience joy through music.

To learn more about the gift of growth, visit www.tonyrobbins.com/gifts.

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Sandra world realise every challenge has ever been brought to me has made me more, I become more so I can serve more psychology more that's why work here in this life to bring more good, more great, bring inside Bring strength, bring action Why were you welcome to the tunny robins pie? Cast you listening to me so? That is part of a special season on contribution called force for good we're, exploring the tangle of life. The motion drive growth, joy, gratitude connection consciousness, race presence and forgiveness, you'll hear Tony. Could seize robins, explain each gift and hear stories of true heroes that illustrate. Are, they show up in real life. Hope. You enjoy this episode on the gift of joy. There been a couple days.
That really stand out for me when Muriel just came alive and had full guy belly Lass one of them was recently we He went outside. We like to go sit outside the breeze in our hair, and it was a little Sunnyside was wearing my son, Glasses and Muriel Isley seemed a little jealous, she kept reaching for them to get me a look like where my so I asked her pointedly a scenario. Would you like to wear my son glasses and she said clear as day he asked so I feel all right, lady, let's do it. I put on my sunglasses, and we proceed to have the funniest twenty minutes photo showed itself vs tat. She was guy fasting, laughing she's, dead, me like west side signals doing like lay back in the chair like she's enough super have. Hilarious at one point, I'm taking a picture. I showed to her. She looks at the camera
She just starts laughing and sheep didn't stop. We got the best pictures. There was just one of those days where we both were like the sun so good. That's me, go paper. Uni he's a community actor writer director producer and a caregiver for Alzheimer's and dementia patients. That story, you just in town, is about a woman named Muriel who has Alzheimer's Disease two days a week. Michael comes to mere Ozma, we're a care center and spend time with her. They go and walks outside the arts and crafts they sing. She holds his hand, but a big part of what Michael does is make Muriel laugh Michael works for a company called laughter on call, an organization that pairs comedians with dementia and Alzheimer's patients,
sinners that are struggling with the disease, one on one time with a comedian, can ward off isolation and make them feel human again. It brings joy at a time that is extremely difficult for everyone, including their families, and their caregivers. Joy is a short but powerful word. What it means and how we experienced joint happiness is different for everyone. You may feel joy when you're laughing so hard that it hurts like Michael Muriel dead. There should be specific moments in your life that you felt extreme joy like the birth of your child or the moment you fall in love, regardless of how you experienced joy. One thing is for sure far too many people believe that joyous, something that happens to them instead of something that's created joy, is a choice purpose
we made in this episode were exploring the gift of joy you're, going to her more from Michael and the founder of laughter on CALL Danny Klein Modus at you. Also here from a remarkable woman named draws Clark whose helping others experience choice through classical music, but first here's a message from Tony and saved robins on the gift of joy and happiness and how we can put him brace. It is created as we move into the new year. Our final session is on the power of joy, and we really about it? Was everybody mostly to want to be happy the reality is most people, art, most people have all these reasons. Why they can't be happy when the truth is happiness. Is a decision before us happy the committee to being, but more people are committed, having like a certain way when they are being happy and our culture
we'll see what value happiness at the highest level? It's crazy live in a world where there's so much available to us. So many freedom, so many choices, but we forget the ultimate power is happiness, happiness, as a power happiness is an ultimate advantage. Happy people live longer. It's proof. Happy people better relationships. Happy people are better parents. Happy people with more fulfilled lives, really need to be truly happy. Most people somehow happiness is under control. We have to try to chase it and find it somewhere. There's something happens to us when a reality is something we create. In fact, truthfully some time we'll get in the way of our own happiness. Aryan. You have me shit. You remember, I think woman I was always chasing my happiness. I was waiting until this great event happened in my life when I got married or I had a child or even a simply be waiting for the weekend. I'd be in my day to day life taking all my gosh. I can't wait to Friday and I miss so much
I miss the joy of the moment in unanimously, for viruses can be beautiful and painful a messy. At times I took myself out of the moment of the preciousness of the grace of the moment. There's an intimacy when step into what life is offering us and its. The focus has I've age in life experience. If there's anything, I ve realized is that happiness is now happiness this one. We dropped the expectation that life should be different other than what life is offering us. We don't have to privilege to repeat this moment? Is there a moment is precious and I think, that's probably been the greatest gift of my own awakening or awake up to this moment of life and not wanting to sacrifice trying to chase it rather than leaving it the to use, really simple You can't be joyful now, it's Gonna happening Gyre, gentlewoman expelling planet. Do what all things do that fine joy make decisions.
Joyful. Make the decision to be happy, make the decision to find a good decision to appreciate, as opposed to judge, what's happening in your wife maybe the most important decision making this lifetime, because without it everything else and life doll, but with Everything in life is lifted. While I go, the causeless joy holiday season. You don't need a reason to be happy surfing. I'm gonna be out before already written. That child like all and wonder that council just being present in the moment and remembering how lucky we all are to be alive? you only an excuse to feel good, the gift of pure joy, and if you get that give yourself it'll be the ultimate. He give you give everyone that you love. So thank you. You were span, these links with checking in with us. It's been a joyous time to be with you Can my sweet love for the joy you give me every day of my life is who could give my life happy hour days? Everyone love too long, the blessed happy how many Is everyone thank you for joining us gutless
number one negative emotion that people with Alzheimer's struggle with his fear. I mean: how could they not things are just now recognisable. So when we come in words springing like pure happiness and joy and good times, and whenever takes sitting that that's Danny Claim motives that she's an actor comedian. And the founder of laughter on call a company that brings lightness and laughter Alzheimer's and dementia patients and you didn't really mean to start laughter on call. In fact, the company was born out of Danny's own experience. Moving her mother Muriel, it was diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease from her home in New York City to a memory care facility, in LOS Angeles back in two thousand. Sixteen so laughter on call really started, probably back when my mother was still living in New York, although I don't think I had the idea in that moment, but she was living in New York City by herself and isolated. My sister in boston- and I live in LOS Angeles. She had been
diagnosed with Alzheimer's disease, and we just knew that it wasn't gonna work for her to be alone there, even though we had round the clock care for her, but it was a very isolated life though made the decision, with my sister, to bring her out to LOS Angeles where I live, and I have two young children and whether it just seemed like a better place for her I found this community called Silverado Beverly place that is solely committed to memory care, which makes it unique because a lot of assisted living they harm like a memory care floor or memory care wing, but Silverado is full memory care and that their whole way of being they have a very specific point of view, which is here and to love him. Today accepting of the disease and there's no shame in all. Behaviour is embraced and it's a joyful place. So I found that, and I brought my mother there and initially she seemed really ok, it's very beautiful, but then
think. Within a couple months. It became clear that she wasn't leaving. She became depressed and withdrawn and she wasn't really eating, and I was very concerned about it. I was a dentist, actually very upset, and because allay my dentist is like a life coach, and I just was talking- and I said you know I wish I could higher to medium to cheer. My mother up. I think that would make her laugh. I just wish I can hire a comedian and she said well. Why don't you my good can I do that. So I tried I went home and I posted on social media. Looking for comedian interested in gerontology paid gig, my phone rang Wi. Minutes later, and it was a friend of mine in New York. City was a comedian and she said only. I just got off the phone with a friend of mine, in LOS Angeles, who wants to work with seniors like this is perfect, so I call that and she came over to met my
other, and she was so honest and real with her and just sat down, and she looked right in our eyes and chair like New York, accent, which is very familiar to my mother. When she said I know you I want to talk to me, you probably thinking who is they smart just sitting down and talking to me like this, there were some about the experience, the word schmuck that just like my mother just started laughing and laughing, and it was so great and I was so thrilled and ass, an ok. Your higher wages come so she started coming eight hours a week. Basically, taking my mother laugh and keeping her company, and it just had a profound effect on my mother's life, where she was eating again and she was laughing and singing and much more engaged with the community, even for the time when the comedians weren't there- and I just thought, while this is really Mark of all this should reach more. People like, I think I stumbled on something and then another family
protein and asked if they could have someone for their mother and have the same experience. So that's pretty much What started it was so undeniable that I was like a guy. While this was not my plan for my life, but I'd love to bring this to everyone who needs it today, laughter and call provides a variety of services, including individualised comedy care working indian in comes in and spends one on one time with the client giving them the connection and interaction they often long for beyond memory loss, ass and general disorientation. One of the most devastating effects of these diseases is the feeling of extreme loneliness. Each comedian also gets to know the clients history from their family, so their able to provide them with the best most individualise care possible. I created a five page in take form for the family, and it has all these questions about the history of their loved one, which is grey because it's a joyful away for the family to get together, and then I am what member with a crazy family vacation, I really
on all the details of the person's life, not just the happy step but like the path of Baden like or a teacher that someone had, that a loved one went to bad against or something just really rich details about the person's life, so that the committee, comes in with all this information and knowledge and cultural touch, stones and personal touch to communicate with the loved one about, and they just start talking. They probably We have in their own personal material, because that's just how comedians connect with people its away. To draw a person out is to talk about. Well, my own fear, my own problems, and you know I know you did X Y, see and then do kind of kings, throwing details of their life at them until their face lights, up or singing will basically do anything. I always like people to pay like a tree or favour through, because I really believe and breaking Brad with another person to create connection, because even though definitely there to make the person last given the nature of the disease,
I can promise you're gonna lap laugh every time, but we definite We will have convent engagement, that's what we're there to do to really see the person and be with them and make them feel loved and joyful and not bring any sadness into the room. Is there's enough sadness and there's enough fear laughter on call, so does interactive. Storytelling shows where comedian comes in with it story theme in mind and take suggestions for details from care home residence together. They create a story, that's compelling and very entertaining for everyone My favorite experience going to this one senior residents last year. It turned out it was on titanic remembrance day which like who even knew that with that was, but they did, and so I came in with a comedian and we set it up that this ship was going down and we were friends on the ship. It was one well, because there are so many places to go on a ship we had to go. The kitchen and get snacks good.
Rooms and pack suitcases, and then you engage everybody. And what should we bring this it's going down. What should we bring? What was really interesting, as you would think it would be really Dar, but there was one woman there who knew every fact about the Titanic and she just kept calling out all these specific, which was so funny. By the band we pass through the ballroom It is always so wonderful to connect a room people, and so we desire that they were playing amazing, grace and a whole. Room. Sang amazing grace like as the ship was going to work, a dingy and we made it to New York and it turned out that my friend on the ship was really my long lost sister and our people, and were there and we lived, it was super super fine but finding out one
sin was really into cruises, so he played the captain and he knew everything about being a captain, because there are still spaces in their brain that have information. So what could have been like really Depressing situation was just like everyone had a great time. It was so fun. Michael paper, Uni has been working with Danny's mother Muriel for the past nine months with laughter on call, you had a little bit from him, the beginning of the past. Here he has again, as he shares why he believes, comedy and laughter have such a profound impact on people, Alzheimer's and dementia. Well, why name? the committee after writer director so in itself, for so I've known from day one the impact of laughter, but I dont know of eight, surely knew the impact of a medically and spiritually until I started working. This job
the level of joy that laughter rings and companionship with humor is beyond something that you can even imagine. I pressed we witnessed joy the catalyst of somebody staying alive. It sounds the low strange vice I saw somebody who I was saying goodbye to. I thought it was done. I thought time was over, and I dont know they wanted to go yet because if this work is companionship, I think, this level of joy, that they receive from Heaven somebody hold your hand made them laugh put his smile in their face keeps them going, because I think it's just We the cognitive mind and their hearts. For me,
the impact of laughter is the ultimate it brings joy to everyone around the workers, at these memory care homes. Those are doing the work. It's been something to where I now led more with joy and gratitude, because if these people and working with laughter makes us all feel better, we know this intuitively and science backs it up, but science has also starting to reveal the particular impact it has on people with Alzheimer's and dementia. In fact, according Research at the University of New South Wales and Australia chemotherapy can be, as some drugs in managing agitation and dementia patients and another study,
conducted at the Osaka University. Graduate school of medicine in Japan found that the positive effects of humor can last for weeks after therapy session, but comedy care doesn't just have an impact on the person with Alzheimer's. It has a profound impact on the comedian and caregivers to that laughter I call and working with Euro has had on the US been beyond something I can even familiar described. There was some party that happen me last year and beyond that really was sitting with me for years, and I knew I had to change it. This job filled the place right time is well where it just allowed me to stop worrying about silly inside myself because I was seeing the bigger picture what's going on with material, but these other patients
tat. They needed somebody who had everything in its made. My level of empathy, groups or something I didn't even know escape because you have to go in there with a clear heart, a clue solar fear had became there's so much going on foot. Then you can't bring your craft to the door He had to leave it there and and by the time I am coming back to the door. By being there. My heart feels clear as you just good, because I know I'm getting that reaction in that smile or that last from them, and each makes me feel ok a truly put into words. How rate this has been for me is hard to say, as I think you have to see it on the outside. The outside of me is night and day.
You been reversal from when I started you're listening to the forced forget season in podcast, past tournois by the ten gifts that we're featuring this holiday season, including emotion, drive, growth, joy, gratitude, connection, consciousness, grace presence and forgiveness. Please visit W W w dot. Tony robins dot com, slash gifts, gee, I f p s and to find honey, robins products and events that can help you identify your gifts, gotta Tonia, Amazon COM, slash shop as each Opie. Welcome back to the twenty Robins podcast. You just heard from Danny the founder of laughter of on call a company that brings comedy to Alzheimer's and dementia patients.
And Michael Paper, Uni, comedic actor and Alzheimer's caregiver. It's in this episode works pouring the gift of joy and how different people experience joy in their everyday lives. What join means to you and what it feels like to you may be very different from your friends, your family and co workers but for many people around the world from all different backgrounds, joy is created through expression. In fact, one thing that Tony says is true: joy comes from being and expressing who you really are. You might express yourself through pain, seeing dancing or the written word, you may express yourself by fashion or the way you present yourself, but for some people like Ross Clark, the best form of expression through music Sue raises an opera singer, a classical soprano she's, a full and rich lyrical sprinter voice and a commanding stage since by rolling up listening to Motown, music, gospel and jazz
or in a million years did Ross thing. She would grow up to be a classical musician. I am the queen, two central african american singer. I grew up in the church, I'm from Pittsburgh Pennsylvania. So I grew up in this working class blue collar neighbourhood. There was a programme in Pittsburgh, call centres for the musically, talented, and so I went to audit can for them and what I always thought it was. I was going to grow up and become either Patti Labelle or Diana Ross and change gowns. Every two songs like that was my plan. Audition after I say my song. They asked me to run scales, and so they kept going higher higher and higher, and so did I and then they said to me you're an opera singer, and I was light, and what are you talking about? You know I was dislike. Who knows anything about that? It's my you know I go to a Baptist church. I knew how to sing out of that really can to opera kicking in dreaming, unlike child
no, you don't understand. I live, do thou stage the life blood of that Finally, when I got to college- and I was auditioning for programmes, every single college accepted me in the upper programme- and I was like a god here- we go. Let's do this, and so that's how I feel Allie embraced my give rise, went on to it and the University of Pittsburgh, where she studied opera and journalism and was part of the Hind Chapel choir one of the most prestigious Ah Capella choirs in the world, even had the opportunity to tour all over France with them. But there was one night in France in particular that she will never forget, as fate would have it. We were in Paris, on my twenty first birthday, so I turned twenty one impair slight. Who does that was salute amazing, and one of my other girlfriends, who also was in the choir, also Saint Jazz, no Hampton was in town. The choir was
predominantly why this was a bad in the late seventies, early eighties, if you're not familiar with Lionel Hampton, it was an african earth. Musician and bandleader rose to fame during the nineteen fortys and fifties and whose achievements have Meda Major impact on jobs, music, we does showed up at the sky- it or an were these african american girls coming to say, hey. My girlfriend was again we're where you see line or from the states and light they this role out the red carpet dislike. And gave us great seeds and then, during the course of the concert, Lionel handed us, the mine we got same with Lando helped in in Paris this particular night would end up making a lasting impact on ROZ. Innovation never could have imagined. It me her realise that all things are possible
So what I would say is I meet again. Pittsburgh was an amazing jazz town with a rich history, and so all the radars came through in so having been informed by those elders who taught me and nurtured me and then to go over to Europe. Thinking that I'm only gonna be singing and latin in italian and german and just happened to be in the same city was Lionel Hampton and again get to show up Oh well, yeah. I can sing jazz too, and I get to do this watching this I call on he was so kind and so open, and so we fear in Europe bet you're. Looking at that saying, anything is possible. All things are possible and gave me the opportunity to be clear that I didn't have to take just one part of myself or another part of myself. I could show up fully and I'll send it. As myself and say well, there's room for all of that and all of me in this business
Rosalind back to Pittsburgh and started working while she got her career as a singer off the ground. But then life happened she got married, started a family. She and her husband had two children, one with special needs. His first seizure when it was eight months old, You can't even imagine something that little shaking that hard. That was a turning wait for me, because I had to make the decision to let my car. We're go for my son's health and well being. I chose to support my then husbands career inside move, clear across the country away from family. I've got this baby having seizures and being transported by the paramedics every couple of days and so I knew that I still had to find a way to feed my soul was an artist Ross, continue to
her soul through music, but realizing she could never have. The international classical career should always dreamt of. She decided to do something even bigger concerned about the lack of performing opportunities for artists of color in the classical. Parts Rob took action. She had always been inspired by Arthur Mitchell, the first african american dancer within your city ballet and founder of the Dance Theatre of Harlem, the first african american classical ballet company growing Like I said, I wanted to be the dancers one of my cousin got the gene, and so she was the original Firebird Dance Dear Harlem Science, the pleasure and the honor of watching Arthur Mitchell, make this amazing company and give little black girls. Who is an opportunity to do an art form that they have been told? Your bodies right for it. You can't do this, so I was at war. If Mr Mitchell can do that for dances, maybe I can do it for singers, so I made the choice to start giving.
New. I couldn't have that career, but I wanted to give every artist of color that unity to live there drains so Rob founded. Opera Newark, a nonprofit that promote cultural diversity in the classical arts and provides educational outreach as well as development opportunities to school age. Children and emerging artists, she's committed to presenting classical music from an ethnocentric perspective, So when you talk about and ethnocentric approach to the arts or as normal. The ecology, that's letting your history and who you are where you come from form how you approach the arts, but more than anything Ross realises the rule of music in helping people heel and connect regardless of race the city, but I really believe is dead. The arts heel and that we're gonna create hope and healing through the arts, There's a common bond. I don't care
nationality, you are what facing are where you come from. Music is an integral part of life. I think We can come together on what common, what we can agree. On how we can celebrate one another. How we can take that I would say: oh my gosh, I see you, that's all. Makes me cry too, especially when you sing classical music, where people like what you say, but I felt it I think one of the most rewarding things about this journey was offered a wise. We do a lot of work in underserved community, so we do pre, dress, rehearsals and free performances. You know we partner with boys and girls clause, and kid too would never see classical artist or know what that is so just having their jaws dropped and then looking at you with these beautiful why'd, I say how do you make your voice do that. You would think that in this hip hop era, kids would not be open to a but they are, and we actually created a program called from heightened hip hop many of them.
During that robs works with have had a history of behavioral issues and use music as a way to express themselves in a productive? there was one young woman. She had a lot of behavioral issues and they warned me about her ahead of time in whatever- and it was just a safe place for her because she had a horrible history, so there was a reason for her. Acting out one day we left are saying and she opened her mouth and it was I like you, ever knew. This child, you know who everybody else's like she'll, tantrum, actual data that she just open her mouth India's beauty came out of. It is absolute B, beauty and it was just one of the most touching moments of my career as you can probably tell rises. The type of person that will light of her room and not just because she's, charismatic and talented she's, just someone you can feel she radiates warmth and
joy, but at the end of the day, the way ROZ shows up in the world to her family, to the kids, that she works wealth and to her loved ones is a conscious decision that she makes every day I think joy at the end of the day is a choice. For me, like my theme, in the way that our shop in the world is joy and vibrancy and purpose, you a choice of whether or not you tell that really sad story, like my story, could be like really really sad. You know, but I shoulda to find the joy and then I'd shoes to bring the joy. So that, when I show up in a room the atmosphere, should change it. So I think that's what joy is joys, a choice that you make to live the highest version of yourselves and then give the best that you can to mankind the tony Robins podcast, is directed by Tony Robins and produced by the Tony Robins editorial team with
How do you editing and sound designed by Germans did he's? First guests were Danny Modus at Klein, the founder of laughter on CALL and Michael Paper, Uni to learn more about the work they are doing with Alzheimer's and dementia patients visit W W W debt laughter on call dotcom. Our second guest was wrong. Clark, the founder of upper newer, a non profit with mission of promoting cultural diversity in the closet. Arts to learn more visit, W W w dot opera knew our dot org. That's w w! www, dot, o p r, a and oh, I are dot Org copyright Robin research international.
Transcript generated on 2020-04-03.