Chris Redd knows what it’s like to have dreams and then watch them shift in the face of reality. It happened first with the dream of being a rapper, but then Chris realized he had a knack for this comedy thing. Now, as he departs SNL and releases his first HBO standup special, Chris and Marc talk about how your dreams further shift once you’ve had some success in life. Chris also tells Marc how he overcame his stutter, how he turned a corner in his struggle with anxiety, and how he’s adjusting to having money after growing up without any.
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
All right. Let's do this, how are you what the fuckers, what the fuck bodies, what the fuck mixed what's happening? I mark marin. This is my podcast welcome to it. Little elsie. I mean it kind of about c room. I just got to Oklahoma city dont know what to make of it. Yet I dont know I still. I just have no sense of oklahoma city. I can't say, that driving in made me like wow. I gotta live here that hasn't happened yet, but that generally does. In these days when I travel I get to a small city and I think, like I gotta live I did have a little of that and tulsa have not had a here yet you're going to be listening to this the day after the show more assume it went well tonight. in Dallas texas at the majestic theatre tomorrow,
in San Antonio, at the tobin centre and on saturday, albion, houston at the culling theatre want to get out of the way. There's a little run. We're doing me and bites are knocking out texas and oklahoma city. That's what's happening, that's where we're at today on the show. Ah, I talked to Chris read now. This is before we. We talked before got punched in the face with the brass knuckles in front of the comedy seller. He's is recovering from that. It seems and in that an interview before that. So to be no talk of that- and I did ask him why he left us now- which were he was a cast member for many years and he's gonna hbo special. Why am I like this and It's out now So that's why talk to me? I've known him for a few years, seen him
just never happened today is the day. So look I've gotten into a situations not of its not a look. It's not important out I'll walk you through it, so the other night I had a spot argo I was doing judd appetites. Show it's to benefit for charity was me and militia the us, your and Dana curvy. I also had to do the comedy thirty thirty- and these are spots- and I accepted the that wanted to do not really thinking I had because I don't know how to do that. It seems that to get a like five, a m car in the morning to go to the airport, to flight oklahoma city, but that's all right, problem, the issue was there's a place. It's called craig, strong yeah! I know the guy Craig I've met him before I don't eat there a lot, but it's kind of like it's it's kind of way. neighbourhood restaurant for that neighbourhood of hollywood in in
these celebrity sense in a way it just its if a watering hole it's like the old antanas, it's like it's, it's just the kind of go to restaurant over there in near beverly hills. Now I've been there a couple of times. I've been there to eat with Jeff Ross. A couple of times have been there to eat with judd. A couple of seems, like I said: I've met to the maitre d over there and I've met you craig himself had many conversations with them. I went to MIKE binders a birthday party craigs, but I still don't know whether or not I can get a table craigs, not the the thing is is like that you. If this is not it's a real problem, but it just was, I wanted to eat there. I wanted to take it to craigs. She had never been there. She had heard about it she's doing a job. Now wish it's good for her to know about new restaurants, so I want to eat a crags bay. I decided to do that it like four thirty, on the night that wanted to eat, there is
was also the night added. Do the two spots and I have to go to judge, or so I wanted to eat a craigs by here's. usually happens when I wanted you to craigs, because I don't make a right patient. I generally will text Jeff Ross, our text, Jeff Ross and I'll say you're. I've got the text chains on this right I said how to go a man I want to go to craigs at seven. Who should I call just me in the chick I put my name in so so as I say, how's it going man. I want to go to craig's at seven. Who should I call just me and the chick now I don't hear back from him right, so I'm starting to squirm and a mike will fuck. I guess I'm just going to have to go the regular way, but I'm just I have to call in and see if, if my name lands at all, this is a see. I'm really not a celebrity. I'm I don't have a big name and I don't go out to eat much see most of it. I think, is really good. about being a to place, but I cook my own food all the time, so I dont go out. He much by wanted to go
he's my assumption that these people, the couple of people that I know you'll have pole: have sway, have juice, so what I Who is, I basically make Jeff Ross my assistant in this situation, and he he doesn't get back to me. So I called And I put my name in it, but that here's how that goes so I call and a woman answers I could you ever need tables. I here, oh, not eating, guy that I said heights mark me in calling do you have any tables at seven o clock tonight for to mark marin, dropped, a mark marin and dead, nothing. I get zero, nothing net, it worked. This isn't even its on this or even a high and restaurants just in place to eat, but it's the place to eat for certain people, And I dont do I give him? I want those people, that's what I'm assuming so goes right, progenitor waiting list and, unlike ok, how do you smell?
s name just Eric. I want you to say that the date I don't matter right again. This is a luxury but now I can't because jets not really get back to me. I gotta pull out patel ended, so so hey man, can you help me giving the craigs at seven? I want to go there before the show with the girl. I just don't have a contact. The guy knows me I gave them my name fuck. It will see so that bore happened neither Jeff nor him get back to me. So I tell him that I gave them my name fuck. It will see so now. On the other front, Jeff ROS sends me a phone number. He sends me a guy named nick, who is the maitre d. So now I am going to text nick. This is how this is going. So I've got apatow engaged I've got Jeff Ross engage. have called crags and now I'm gonna, I'm gonna text nick who I am sure I met a couple of times right. So I said: hey nick, it's marked marin. I've met you before with jack frost.
Judd Jeff gave me your number was trying to get in to eat at seven before I do judge show at largo. Is that possible? Just me and my girl thanks sorry to bother. I go back to judd because judd hasn't gotten back to me at all. So I said ross gave me nick's number, I'm good, we'll see, and then I wrote good talk and he hadn't talked to me at all. and then like a little while later he texts me sorry, I missed you request, I'm sure I would have gotten you a better seat than ross, and I said No one has got me anything just texted, nick but yeah. Probably cool enough to get into that place and I said, have to do the storage at then I'll come to argo and then he says sounds good. Do you meta contact craig, and I said I just texted nick dry dear name an ross. I don't know what I can do. I just want a table for two at seven and I assume they are hiding one that only special people can have
they are right. I mean craig knows me, I just don't. Go there much uninjured text back, I assume they come through that maybe she called the restaurant and let them know your texting with Nick- and I said I we put my name on a waiting list? I should call back and tell them and then, like the judges, hee hee, hee bales. says. My system is calling you to help, and I said like a real jamak. Calling me, oh boy, ok thanks! I can do wait to see if nick gets back to so ridiculous thanks and then I said a lot of good people working on this now, and he said it takes a village. So now judd's assistance involved high mark. This is key. Did he judged assistant? Let me know if you need any help getting craigs reservation tonight. The assistant network his strong, getting reservations, and I said cool thanks sure
I put my name on some kind of waiting list there. I also texted nick, because Jeff Ross gave me his number. I think, he's the maitre D, I'm just trying to get a table for two at seven feels like. If you call two, I will have put all the power of the comedy industry in hollywood. Behind this request, I imagine I can just wait to hear back from nick or maybe you can to seal the deal with your magic and she said just called your allegedly now at the top of the waiting list keep working on it. If you don't get a call soon, I said how sweet thanks so nick gets back to me at some point. He said I ll see what I can do so I say thanks pal. I have a lot of great people work and on this I hope we can make it happen, sorry to be a nuisance and he said come on in six, forty five to seven, we got you, sir. I mean I mean it, that's what it takes guy. I just I'm embarrassed, I'm embarrassed by the whole situation, but neat yo. Now now I have mixed number and yet
again, I get there in like I've, met Craig many times and he sat at the table we talked about. It was so angry, because I'm sitting there were eating at your pino. She had some pastime meatballs was beautiful, the meal was beautiful I saw it yet. There are some people there of celebrity stay. That's not what I want to go. I wanted to go cause. I want to feel part of my community, so I guess it is why I wanted to go. I guess it is, but it was Europe Every time I go there for some is, I think, a sagged great. There would be no job. Neither would Jeffrey say. There would sag at once- and I was like. I miss bob's agate out of nowhere and then like after we ate craig said that kelly Kelly sag was there his wife and as I go, and we walked out back, I said hi to her and was a kind of sweet, a just look: it's a neighborhood place. And in the neighbourhood in show business it was nice to go out to eat, but if it did, it took me
a lot of support in a lot of help to feel like, I was able just go eat there and, but I feel like maybe I can eat there these you this time I might not have to drag judd abbot our jeff for us in this situation and ask them to do my bidding to give me a table at a restaurant fuckin, ridiculous ridiculous. But that's a battle happened. Look folks, listen! There's a tonne competition for attention these days. So, if you want to create a website, you need to stand out from the rest right square space. The the one one platform for building a beautiful website, so can engage with your audience and sell whatever you want. Your products continue create and even your time and the best Art is it's really easy to use. We used to make deputy ipod back on. It looks great. We made a fast and it's never any problem to updated or add features square space can do that,
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it's it's weird, but I do you know, because you know charlie's only going to be young once right, he's so fucking crazy that cat and charlie beans roscoe the new kitten fucking nuts, like a real monster, is worried about kittens like that that prime time cat experience That's what you want man! You want a kitten, it's fun! It's insane, but it you know, it's double edged double edged cause when you've got a kitten, no matter how cute you know, you're going to be saying this, what our fuck, god, damn it and then like two minutes, where you be a god, damn it I'll, fuck charlie, but that's fine nets to fund part. That's a fun part. kidnapping. You never know how they can turn out. Enjoy that kid, Same what humans, but you know it's just a yeah, charlie's good, Sammy's good. There are good but charlie this
the crazy kitten and the other two don't even know what the fuck do them. Anyway, it's ending folks, it's all fuckin over it's coming down hard. You know them I can about get ready for it, get ready for all of it. None of it good, ok, so look if you thought about installing a home security system, but you're like me, and you put things off because you think they'll be a hassle. You'll want to listen up right now. Devotee of listeners can order the number one rated simply safe home security system for fifty percent off. This is their biggest offer of the year and he won't want to miss it. We love simply safe on deputy because we started using them six years ago and we haven't had to worry about home security since then, and what where there is an emergency. These twenty four, seven professional monitoring agents used fast, protect technology exclusively from simply say to capture critical. Ever
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so there will be no chatting about datting dig it. I just me and red I We got a guy with a solemn hooked up. Man I gotta go My point is my boy, a meet guy I gotta meet. I do have me, can you gotta have a guy for things here gathered a bit everything me yet if you get older, you gotta collect those guys. I tend to do a lot of things myself, but but you get a little money and then you start like: why are you doing that yeah? That transition from make enough money to to delegate to having a guy having a guy age without like one, do you get when you still haven't a guy clean, your house learning we use our having clean is its we. ray yea and it was like I was on a rose so much
it's so much? The ours is never home. I was only home and filth and I'm like yo, I think, now's. The time I get the guy now you're like hey this place, looks the same. after eating their food still out a reason, they're, all terrible yeah. No, I I don't. I it's weird adjustment to make. When you go through life, we met grown shit and then and then one day realise like what what other people do you and also what am I save my money for our spend money. Did you I'll aspirin money ass, you are now in place of my life. Worm started to be response, but I was broke for so long when I started making money, I had d like real, live all the young money doing oh really yeah. Oh, I was standing on the couches in clubs yeah all the shit like I was too. I was older,
So I was like thirty three yeah, so I was like yeah. It was cool, but it doesn't feel the same. I'm not in my twenties and I don't know half these people and I and I got too many bottles. I can't drink god, damn liquid, the fuck. Am I doing it's kind of a sad moment. It yeah it's a very sad realization, just sitting on the couch like yeah man, whose couches I'm an adult, I'm thinking about adult shit did you have any dogs ship came in here? I've had those moments where it's sort of like I'm going to go. Do it I'm going to spend the big money and it's a and you just sitting there disappointed yeah yeah. disappointed like hey man? How can this doesn't feel better mohammed say I'm home we sail day. She said you know what they got to a point where you just have to come to terms with some dreams
you just missed out on Monica just missed it or maybe maybe they're. Just not like you know they. They don't feel as good as you think they are. You know what I mean like you think, that's the answer. You think that's the way to live, and then you get there and you're like nah. It's just not it's not me. Bro! Nothing taught me how superficial I was as a kid as trying to do those things as an adult What the fuck are you fighting for? I know we talked about that in your special. It's kind of interesting that, like there is a couple of interesting sort of the idea of of dreams You know having dreams any having kid dreams of one thing. You know them But you know in in this budget about basketball. But then, as you get Do you dream shipped bite, Neither one limit that practical or that they're all like heart, where'd you grow up. I was out was born a saint louis and weakness bit, ike art, half our time in Saint louis habitat, mississippi, move Chicago and I was seven and then we move to the suburbs of chicago
neighbor veil, a roar, see a family in Saint louis, administers mississippi, say Louis Chicago, mississippi, allay we have a likelihood of people, my family a year, so it could be like that. other people there's like who's, got all the residents sisters and you for you, my errants, my brother. Emma you pick up all my my mama has cast a fourteen siblings like yea am, I might Montgomery, have fifteen keys row and enhanced, We haven't homework here and she had marty's whoever bullets- oh my guy, a crate, Could you imagine going earnest gonna stop one thing didn't three and above all, that sets a lot of cousins, A lot of cousins, a lot of a lot of people just around and I love it. So I'm used to growing up with chaos. Yeah and you know see the childhood was in Chicago yeah most to those in chicago, and we will. Then we kept our roots in mississippi. So we would go there all the time, but I am trying to
you're out when I first started seeing you around like it, because it wasn't stand up Initiate? Yes, I started envy your stand up, but did you start and stand it yesterday? in iran, improv and in chicago around the time we were. That was a sin to do both yeah. So my attitude on the face are you a real stand up guy yeah, because I heard you like to do organic opening? like. I didn't really see you around the standup club. I remember seeing you whoosh at three yeah, but I think I think our first. Oh, we first saw each other and laugh factory when Heaven nearly used to do that. Show where, like have people come up and talk she or or do a say in, unlike sit there
shit for a little while I kind of remember that yeah everybody had these big ideas and we were both on it yeah. I think I did one show what you did a couple of shows which I like, but I think we really like cross paths. It's usually that he was either at that show. Or was at the comedy store like well yeah. It was one of those things where it's like. You know Christopher Elvis and chris reds everywhere they talk the talk about Chris read, that's what I like to do and not that I have, but I like to look at my hustle that hurts yeah. I'd like to go to a city read whether another guy they had read in his name. not again be gone, long, I'm more more care that guy. Other red Sutton read all jasper red ass, a rare whatever their gas jaspers. Funny youth monies We need to have a seat, and I must say that these are just the way it is a way to run in a desperate men. All I know is death. Read it michael red,
play for two bucks now either that gets so many siblings you have. I have my younger brother and my older sister, three of you, but then I I was I was kicked out when I was younger. I used to live with my friends, so I just kind of in an brothers to so you're in the suburbs. Ashikaga idea the industry talk about that world that the herd in the suburbs funny, but I because I want to say I'm really bring it up. I watched it badly. babe anyone voting just are wondering if he likes like to tell about this, but I am so much especially where they live with what out? it's good, I yeah, but but but what to? Why did you get kicked kicked out? You know what, because I was out, I went to a really racist. School it was raised. Cannibalism allows area yeah, it's racist group that there is a very front
It was really my fault, I would say it was. It was like a what she wears, but this is in the suburbs of Chicago yeah and like at the time. I wasn't. I wasn't communicating that well with my parents cause they were very much like we, not friends, I'm your parents, we don't talk and they held you at this time. I'm, like I mean it's like thirteen. Thirteen thirteen on- and so I was kind of a quiet kid until I got to middle school and high school and then it and then it I started to just kind of have beef with kids, and like they would be calling me out my name and I had like Y kids, yeah, yeah and, and I had like, I had thursday. I am anxiety. I have an anger issue. I didn't understand any of that stuff sonorous. I was a very hyperactive, hyper reactive kids, so I went to my parents like yo, I'm having trouble with this racist, racist shit in school, and I thought they would feel me because they were from mississippi parents.
yeah apparent, but when the history of your people, they were there, but like it, it's my parents. They were like Are we ve been through so much shit and mrs sipping, your racism, owning a sound like a real issue? I didn't mean it there. I iridescent definitely how it came in. I was so I was so hurt, but it did I just kind of clothes off. They will fucking. If ya, don't treat me like I'm a bag kid I will just be a bad kid in india. I started later to save I'd bet. Yeah I made this is like fighting back. I was like I'm gonna go, I'm gonna go almost Go go hang out her with what kids I really want to be iraqis. It looked like me here so that began my career. of trying to just like living these dubai.
is it being in being in the burbs and then going out trying to being a hood at the same time. Do you remember like before it before you turned like where you like, a like he's, just a good kid, like you just didn't, say much or what? What was it like? A dramatic change? I really had to force myself out of kicked like I was an extremely introverted. I had a stud, We had a study year may so had alike. I when I was a bad one. Oh man, it was and how I got over. It was our rapid and in front of people like, and it was you think this study was was like a psychological thing It was like a fear thing or what yeah it was. It was a. It was a fear because I hadn't really fear of speaking in front of people and because I took I took like how I was raised. I cannot speak. time we at yours, too So literally that, like you are, I would be. I was just a super quiet kid for awhile and then it got to the point where it was like man. If I keep doing it, I'm gonna get. My ass will bury day, stuttering yeah, so I so I so. I fix that
I mean as much as I could. What how was the point was it your idea to just start rapping over the stutter yeah, oh yeah yeah. I was like I'm going to wrap wrappings. What I wanted to tell you then like twelve ten, when I started got, I was like I bought my first rock rock him cd yeah and cause that hurt. I didn't know, the moroccan. We had hymettus my because it was. I welcomes the best rap alive. My right were ass. Well, I want to be her, and so I asked when I bought my first. rat record, listen to it, and that was right in my own little wraps go to school in battle, but, like I Thus I had a red ahead arise the writer, while of were the worst battles of african tat you did you give. Did you did note? Nutmeg knows looks like a ago. It was tat ever brought it took so long or the other kids laugh in a terrible kind of. I think then I thought you saw because I was definitely doing it everyday, so I was getting validation.
iframe yeah, it's weird when he when, when you're around somebody with a stutter, because, like I mean we're all you know relatively aware of people's, you know when they have a problem. Well, yeah, like you've gotta, be a pretty young kid that bus down a guy was started by ten or eleven. You would think they'd be a little nicer, but like even just the other day, I was in the studio with a guy. I can't what what context was that, where I was ask him what I should do and then he started and he had that that stutter were was stopping and there's just a moment with the entire time zone. Changes ryan, you, like ok, we'll just waded out, don't be rude, dealt best. That's what was in it. It was such a looking back. It was such a rude thing to make people watch their battle because it took all months period and then, on top of that, like sometimes it didn't end. We were just we like trump is trying to read a line and you can hear the belt and all the kids, like all hook,
I do what am I my cousin started going to school with me and he got mad one day cause like I eat my pizza, like the pizza cut back me like, but like once it, but there it is again a lot of confidence, though cause like cause. I started like reading up more about just stuttering and in general, like with by slowing your mind down, let your thoughts catch up. Celtic wolf, I talk faster, not rat faster. Maybe I can catch up with with half family thoughts are gone and so that everyone agrees that started like relaxing most of you when you were a kid and eat, because you are curious arching is I've been doing that for ever do that would have been lost? I should be online at seven insomniac since forever so yeah. Oh, I didn't high strung kid. I was you tat. I had a mortgage, you them a middle kid, but my sister is like the tea years older. So I have like middle kid syndrome- anne oh
Oldest he ain't gonna be a success. at my mom's first but my dad's first madame second okay, you know yeah yeah yeah, but but it's so so you applied this idea. You came up with this concept. Around curing your stuttering, like if we run faster than we would keep up with your mind. Yeah I got it. We would emphasise class in eyes, enact my teacher had a wife work on my stutter yeah, and she said well. The basis of your stutter is because your your thoughts, your mouth, is not moving as fast as your thoughts are. I called one of the two yeah, and so I was oh that's what I just assumed a fine. If I go fast by go faster b, I apparent where help is needed. Doctor that we didn't have like food conversations there, so it ass. I was really people comfortable with it. it didn't like come out like that, are really not enough that they were dead. But it's like wasn't it?
It was very much. It was very much slight nerves in light, anxiety is like if I was nervous and any which was like in Where that I wasn't comfortable he's a lot of other boys, yet I was yet studied hate me rolex speaking. If people was where's fear, but I would also like cracking jokes on the low. So so they there is like I've always been. There's, been a look impeding lay yeah yeah. Well, then, heartily It's a weird thing about being like got a funny person. Is it all comes at a discomfort rate Eventually you gotta make funding yourselves for make fun of. Somebody else is a fine line between yourself deprecation, in fact that guy The line of bullying is always right there right right.
It's like? I'm not going to take the hit you're going to take the hit yeah I mean I got so good at like roasting, roasting, kids in school, it's good when you have that like when, like dozens of rap battles or whatever, when you know it, there's a context, it's okay to do a one hundred per cent yeah cause then cause it's like. Oh, Now I ve been a basketball player right right now, so I must give you are right, but I am but I remembered running into a kid like later or light years after we got a high school and found out. I was his bully we hung out a lot and one of them all the time but like we were all making fun of each other. I thought we were all doing. He fucked him up yeah, so he had his bro this whole like rom com, get back at the bullying moment like we were. I was. I was ha when was this, how many years I may this is at least this is at least to these eight years from school, so the kids do well yeah, unlike in unlike like, and I haven't gotten any big.
airlines, I'm doing well in the community, no one, no one life knows nothing about their shit, so him like a book. What more can enable my friends how china haven't? I am, I see him. I always go make gay men chris well, let's watch this sheet, but you can't do this and indeed this kisses her mouth kisses like three chicks. Just randomly am I what is happening and I can't think of one rose. I can't think of one come back here. He's us like is like somebody. If somebody in the universe is just like this is his moment yet yeah he just got you're going to pay yeah like. What's what now you bet you? I'll make it our maker on it doesn't dollars every four months. What are you do. What you are having a month ago pocketed he just masochism other chicken does he know these women? They don't seem to be resisting,
it seems choreographed the result plan here he comes yeah. I just saw. I saw one girl, but but a bar just waiting to walk and get mouth kiss, but it was like the coldest like a redemption, I went for him, but I didn't even know he he needed and I was like man. I guess I'm just that was my karma had to eat that it is like you had a and I had a cover man I was like. I guess I was like what did I do this kid and make him do this weird, because, like I mean that's it The point is that you think everyone's on this in pay and then you invent, if you really think about like back and emerson any that's what it was like. Oh everybody was talking, she had accept have yet he was set at one point there. Now you get your friends at that guy. Do we? we haven't talked since then, but MIKE. I hope we do well ever closer. He got close. You got closer. You do well hoping to get none from modem rent
miles cs that so once you start the wrapping thing, you get confidence now is it was at the thing you wanted to do. I was a thing I wanted to do tomorrow. We make him cities and I'll make it. Our may I was is easy. Have every actually value, as so many fuckin name, my last was chief. That was a good chief yeah that simple yeah yeah. It's to the point, you know w maintenance, yeah right, but before that I was like I wanted to have a. theory is by vieira wet with John doe, but John doe by john money, yeah, but also John doe. Like yahoo have trouble double mean eight, I was real. Big dove mean a kid there's: it's there is a john doe rocky yeah there's! andorra guy, but he was running out. I'm rap billion knows it. in your world and no one knew me. As John does I had to change us like without keeping No, no it's gonna be too deeply to day was way above the air.
now we are changes to johnny dollar, which wits was not great, no kind of joke. He is very joking, edie. I got into greek mythology now, as in others, lotta cool names- oh yeah, she's us are picked, the thieves object as though it sounded coup, but it is a goddess. Yes, I was like that. Much of that month yet However, no one looks at a riot police dodo. Laguna you recorded and draw these name. I will call under most of them here and what we sell, and you see these rich man. I was seven right of clubs, not was selling them on the streets are selling them at at school yeah. I was, I made some decent little cash. I just I never. I remember when I realized that that was a thing. You know what you were guys who just come up the ACA and and some of his good yeah cause they're not going to, they're trying to get release, but they don't have released, but there's still do in the work that it wants to buy those cities really man. Well,
I don't think I ever bought one on purpose because I was always tricked into it was great. It was that fine line between it's sort of like you want it sort of like alright, just how much you're right can I have one of you need money I'll, take it a yo. Yo them is that it is for you play a levy scientists for you. Like I'm alone there you were so so you're doing that we add swing in city. lincoln cds I didn't want to go to. I didn't want to go to college. I wanted to kind of wrap through high school, is all through high school, the rap thing. Ah yep like it like I like half of middle school. No, I wasn't. I was it like confident enough to do a bunch, a rapid and middle school, be. I was like phenomena of dance. I loved a dance. So, like tat was my thing I found in really medicine in anything, I answer lovedays, I won't work, I wanted it really rightness line between the whole sort of. Economy, of what you say
These are asking what you want to be like getting a gangster with your cousin, yet is really wanted danced in a day. So that's about dog. Do those here, there's a gangsta rapper right now and I love him yeah. He kills it. He kills essex videos yeah, he kills it, but yeah. I never did. I wanted a day that thought there was a daddy was like I thought gangsters could do, I think I want to be versatile thanks that to demands that you know, I I think, there's a ceiling to the type of dance one hundred percent- I don't know if you could be against it. During my urdu musical, I didn't even know I'd, there's musical against me. Echo then you're so dirt. When this time like a year. These two worlds like this cousin, you talkin about he's real guy. Yes, he's a real guy he's representative of two people life, ok, there's a story of my some of it is my cousin keith and
and in a lot of it is my friend Jeremy there. I grew, ok and and their collective we this guy and if, in the end we collectively try re a tray represents, like a few like here, his them and there's this. Our stories are pretty much those to do with more and more yeah anybody, but like because you I give you this nice. Kid who, like you know, is nervous and now in looking back, you you're finding that you have issues that you're dealing with, but but but you you, you get the rap thing to the solve, your your you're, stuttering in awkwardness problem. Here and now you want to go full in full in tillier inaction. I fear I'm not really afraid of much at all. Yeah it'd be. It was like because I was, but I was ten if I then try and act like I wasn't cause, I was all the characteristics about being an introvert weren't. Helping me with what I needed. Yeah know what I'm saying so I gotta I gotta be different. I change this. I gotta figure so what what? What writ? What really happened here in terms of like you,
going into the into the hood the first couple times I got clowns com Z we saw the first time I want to read it out by myself. Like we ve learned what my home markets, and I am coming in from the sub in a homegrown ashley yeah. We said we all went to school in the burrows and we all went to the city. What was the point of cousins, okay and yeah? This is just a hanger hang around. What did we note with the hermes? The gangs are random that we were for they too. We were I hear, and so I had like I had been out, do with west a big julian times where I had not. This is my first I telling you I'm on fifteen fourteen fifteen is not right. Fourteen yeah and I'm so I'm active, but I'm I got my act on broke and major all mass egg, I so we are taken it. People can see, I'm nervous.
No I didn't know at the time, though you don't say I'm just feeling like I'm natural and share. So then this girl ashley, from out there. So she's like hey. I want to go grab some cigarillos chris from the from the gas station and I'm like yeah. Why not put it to me? It was the biggest moment of my fucking life cause. I'm like. I never been here so am I try to match right, but I dont look matches. Obviously I walk way. Motor has little bit I too much too much. You know in his initio. She, she she said hi to her cousin who sit in his car right by the gas. So before I walk in the door dude like a he's like a a mega once a week, I'm like oh yeah, I my goofy. Yes, it's like. Oh that's, her cousin, they're cool people who like get in if I get in a car like a clown, I close the door and there's a dude in the backseat disney references like he's like
but like oh yeah, he was a week and then do came around and I put his arm around my neck right. What do I do is arm off I'm like what the fuck is. This shit man he's like the little car with no random what the fuck was wrong with you, niggers the hood and I'm like that's your cousin and she's like who gives well yeah. Maybe you don't think it was my first introduction to the Opie rio and they gave me shit. We went to this play off spot called the circle yeah. This is where everybody kicked it, and So we went to circle. That's got clown their whole day, but it was, I don't like, after that, it was. It was good liar I was in a mac family day like so he was it wasn't like I was I felt like. I wasn't there, how sure, but I was deftly my hazy vote What was your? Was there a point where you wanted to sell drugs and stuff yea? I wanted to do all of that shit. So I was like I was selling weed for life.
Uproar lotta years. It was a very good anti like when, but in the burps at all over although the budget in the birds in their arms, I was doing some others, some other stuff, because my my cousins in em used to, like you know, run it up with russia where went up in places, riah area, as so im? Not gonna. Tell you so I'm not gonna say on a yeah yeah. We don't need to get anyone in trouble yeah, so the best places to do that with a burp. So that was my contribution to the gang was like yo I'll fight in spots yeah. We could hear the year the location scout the location scout for the game, I'm like yo yeah, I got, I got houses, etc. I set up the lick. I watched the schedule, I know when they go anywhere now that was a setup. I will setup shit all the time sort of where we will go to make money we're here. I used to use risa before they had like of dams and age, my itself, but before
they had like those those alarms at in stores. Sure you can just walk out. What would our fuck. You want to make sure that the the things they click on there yeah the snap on thing yeah, so I will go. I will go buy liquor. I was in high school at the time. Yeah go, buy, liquor and then go to the school go to a park. High school party sell that shit for like three hundred dollars. I was still bottles a hip. I put three hundred dollars like real, so that was kind of yeah. We would yeah yeah yeah because we we knew that had money since we were like hey, we will take it, but what was there ever a point where, where you know it makes you turn around at a certain point, because I I have to assume that you get to like anybody who survives you've taken chances like that yeah like you get your point. We like yes, that done yet it was warm up. What is where my home more women homey worm died. His name was worm s goodnight, yeah. He knows his real name now
that's because you're gonna, like a worm yeah, he was good kid just like just like to smoke and play video games and and and my my homie Jeremy had rob some guys that were on his block. He didn't know that are like gangsters from the city who just kind of moved out to the burbs, so yeah a little money, so they that next day they found out, he did it and they came and shot his house up. And one. Wherein was the only one that died and he had nothing to do with it, nothing to do with it, and we have we know I well. We have been locked up a little bit here and there and stuff like that, but like nothing like nothing, nothing crazy, I had gotten away with it. So at this point my ego was kind of there but yeah, but I was seeing people like go down and there was a. There was a next level of this shit I had. I was like: if I'm going to do this, I have to take it up a notch. well the real fucking directories on your hand like but the opening our it's weird thing didn't know that
I knew that would drugs erotic draft worry you yeah you what you aware of it. We have because years there's a place where you eat meat You're going to cross over and you're, not gonna have a conscience anymore right, death, s, death, in that you're playing by a different set of rules and it's a dangerous eta in any exponentially. You're. The possibilities of your dying is a great increase in what truly that it s exactly what it is it is becomes like the risk is that isn't worth to reward of euro area on top it s like ours, with its always had this chickens were myself like dogs Are you really good at this and have done that? Would not just that, but like a wrangling ever I'm good a rapid or get what happened is I was in bed I didn't know who I was fully that's right on that, so I wasn't bade at each other is authentic could write? also was trying to help so many different people that I was never focusing on finishing a thing
Will they saw how I would always have like these drafts of songs that were good here? They needed to work right in the technique and who s wasn't like drilling it the way I did I correctly that behaviour with kommeni right now that was supposed to be doing this shore, but like also that that method made me so much better. Now applied it back to the music. India comedy music yeah, took off another. Oh oh, I had to work harder, but there was at that point where, like you, that next level The worm died, yeah, aegis you. You got scared, It yeah me and my cousin were like do do we want to end up like this yeah, this kid didn't even get to see a t. in the end he didn't do nothing and he didn't do a thing. You know what I'm saying it was just like me me me, and my boy was like yo we're gonna. Keep you know we kept selling way to senior year wrapping but like as far as all the other seabra we gotta get. We gotta start figuring out how to like get out of this shit right. Was it hard?
nah, I mean not me know we live far away, I did and then, and then somebody has had did. I did something and then somebody snatched on me and so had moved. I moved away to Milwaukee to live with my sister for like a year and really yeah and then by the time I came back. I was out of sync with everybody. Good god is. I use that tonight. What you do in Milwaukee salesman draws off my poor so we we wages. We so we'd mapuche kicked. It must again. for a little bit better and here and just kind of lay low and like how old we figure out what I was going to do, I I was like twenty, oh wow, nice. Maybe nineteen maybe not Was I gotta high school rather just eyes grew. So it's you when you know you you do in time in the self imposed protection programme, and and you think about your life of a thing about it.
Where am I going to take this? I'm actually going to do and- and I was still in the rat phase of my life then so I was like man we're just gonna like me- and mama rap- maybe started late do you know what I'm saying they just like put everything I got into this yeah and I- and I was doing that already but like without the without the bullshit yeah. yeah and and and we you know we had. We had some gigs at some colleges and we and there were some like little things throughout, Nowadays we you're like building up exactly like little. we might invalidated the area will be the interest younger comes up to energy as you're, good yeah. Exactly like everybody, ain't going wow, but there's like four people that are like you're, the best thing I've ever heard jack. I wonder it will say what he says, though, just that that guy actually he'll go to every show. Oh man who is swayed whether the beats on or know that, guy, that guy yeah yeah, but it wasn't until like it was like twenty two.
Three, where I had literally from four point. I could work had spent every dollar trying to make rat work and was it s got to the point where I'm like. Am I going to just keep beam roque? What did you find? Did you have a moment with? That, too is like. I don't know man it's weird when you realise that some county person and you know that cause you do and you were, but there there That moment we like, and I don't think I'm good enough. It is yes. I would it was like. I don't think the way I I feel I'm gonna get on or become who I'm supposed to be. yeah. I don't think the vision I have here is division. That's playing out, and I was like if I keep studio lay in his tracks the same thing in the same way. I think thirty I'll still be here doing this in this way, and I just couldn't risk that,
it's a weird moment where you realize, like you know this. Kid never go any way and I might not know it right exactly until it's too fucking late. Writing is no. They can't do nothing. It's like what more proof do you need in twenty two years of not working You're, ok, you're good, but I mean to me. I was like I could read my ass off me as the ok, we're like it just wasn't: click the thousand men are needed I need it. I need has been dancing going at that time. So so, when I start wrapping, the wrapping was, I was tv would wrap these other skill sets were just I wanted to be the rapper. I could do everything so after I stop a rapid I I looked inward. I was like okay, what other things in my good at yeah that could be my next dream. I chase yeah fuck going to school right. I chase dreams, yeah! That's what I do yeah, I'm a dreamer about act for victory, as was like our dance. So so I went to an addition.
For what are kept. video- and I I I got the audition here- did well yeah got the gig yeah and then I was gonna work or got the callback right. I was going to the callback yeah before it even started. These mother fuckers were like this his caddie and like talking shit to each other dancer, not him. I was leaving gangsters and rapids and shit, and now I'm over here with his caddie ass mother fuckers. they're, like which you can epa, am I not good? I didn't even do the carbon our walk, dead, outdated places like now. Yeah. I don't love it this much yet, because I'm like none of that shit would have turned me off. If I really wanted to do it right, you know, but after I left, the dream of my life am like, I know this awful moment like I had there's a moment where I can't remember
someone shared it like a. I went on an addition like I barely had nature. They sent me an audition like a cup doritos commercial, commercial, sex, remember, but only knows I I've been told. I walk into a room and there's a bunch of car that room waiting to do this, and I'm just focus on that. You are not doing this. Welcome potato chips, you now. I think you gotta yourself. Man well yeah, because, like what are you willing to you, you how want to sell out for nothing for nothing I was worried about the time of like beaten, one of these marfa cars and he gets liar brow. I got a letter is that our colleague I'm in trouble. He would which we actually lucked out. So then, ok, and things over dancing is over and so before, right before comedy, I was completely lost spiral.
Will do then, twenty four I'm twenty, I'm twenty, I'm so twenty two okay you're twenty two! So you get your on schedule, so you're you're, you're you're not going to be a criminal. Now I can be a wrapper, I'm things out, so they lost. This is the most random thing. I came a my model manager row. I see you just want to eat. Just has hustle we do talk about. We took what those people it's like fifteen lashes on a business card that was for those cards. What you feel man I was like. You know how much I look for when I'm going I called like it too. After after this is done. I will send you some. If I could. I hope I can find some chevy your picture on it. Yay. Oh, my god, yeah dude, what with the silly writing the curse of the air with the dignity of analysis, but they will accompany provision?
It was like a model man, they say. You're scared, see, you're, anomaly level, pimp no comment. Yeah is what it felt like button and not at first, though, at first it was just. I was at the This club haven't have get into all the time with a couple of friends, and they just happen to be. Dsl and second arc the visit his people were at air. They were scouting for one of his artists, videos, ia and so they went to meet with my friend cat and us. So cap and cap was like hey. Could you you come and be and pretend you're my manager, because I don't feel safe with these guys and and that's where mixture of things on the up and up so they are not to be manages? I'd go with some shit. Real quick I went over there, this play the position and she got she got to I drove her to the gig just days, cooler we got to check here. I got the ten percent that next week I had for more
Those that were led them like submit for shit and driving is places I'm now like numbs managing It is my where were you I am. I had just move just move back to chicago Roy s chicago yeah, it's a roar cause. I was what we require that these are my parents and ran right ourselves broke his foot. He hated help out. the place is sleeping in the house. Hey, hey, hey, remember me soggy his. I guess we could work. Do it. She had just lost her job so that we were both in the in in a in the right place for change. oh really year was it was cool like your mother has been one is twenty two but yeah, but it was something tat made. Her vulnerable in a way tat. I needed to see her any like. I was the same way, and so we re would have really like it over.
well that was that moment yeah, he didn't know what you were doing or who you were in, and she had time on her hands and was a little beat up herself, yeah and so, and so in that way we got close. We are super close the time it took some work, but yeah no, and I was managing these models actually make some money here, some decent money. Really it was worth it It was like disappointed me, what what did they do? They whispered videos refer shown up a parties in that kind of stuff. We yet some some s ear. Did a few of those. It would. I be videos that there was a thing called mixed or one way there was. This event is fashion biotic, the answer even right as outlook for that I bought for three years and it has just been different just different like events there yeah booking for all on the level shit on level dug out safely. You that's good yeah. I was very. I was very like I did what to do. That was just like being asleep.
Well, apparently yeah yeah? I was like if I'm gonna do this. I'm gonna take a series and I'll and plus a lot of girls with my friends here and I have become friends. I spend much time with them. So you know and so then, but then it got to a point where I was like a really oh just a man is motherfuckers because they got you gotta see them. We're talking about. Where had we write rise level? Where I am, I really do. I want to manage, build up the business it's for girls, right yeah and because they were starting to be these rumors of like pippin and all this other stuff. So I have to either take it up a notch to either kill those rumors and just really really go hard at the. Or take one more shot at my own dreams, real quick at that time, which was I had no idea, neither does it know there. I just knew I should try something else, because any quicker Can I give you staying in those game just gonna, be the gout different business cards every couple years. Exactly so I'm hats one year. Taboo budgets. We got
jack. You know it. It is one of the things yeah, so I it was really me playing video games high as hell with my with my homie, markus. I was rapping with that we we were not rapping. At this point we were just playing video games, smoking weed, and then I saw a commercial for second city, and I was like Really I bet on based on tv on tv which I've never seen again, but it was just dead ass. Wait. I hadn't really heard of second cd at all yeah at this point, and so I went up to my pops like yeah, you gotta a second city and he's a good he's, a good second city. If you start naming people- and I was like oh shit- maybe maybe maybe I'm funny- yeah right yeah and my boss, like me- What's your dad do? What does he do all my dad? He did a lot of things, but he he was a loan officer for churches in the inner city, so he would. He would help like a black churches, get funds to for to keep the churches or to build
expand and stuff like that. Okay, but he had. He had a few other jobs before that yeah yeah one one was a repo man in detroit, so my my boyfriend shot at You have lays lead their work. You say you ve got shadow like. Should they work this and get it finally easy, in an environment, a he's, a good guy, though my dad's cool shit, always supportive yeah. He was. He was You know why didn't agree, auditor I would hearings and he never is as a key. Definitely like wanted to see me do well yeah and he of it too at grow enough. He was the more lenient one with dreams It was but use baseball player. She had won a yes, sir. He chase during my arms did about a book in here. She did it very very well here, if you like, don't tell me how to maybe I did in owing here in here
ne by so he had a little more patience with my dreams right now, even if he didn't know how to support me vocally every time yeah, he was still like. Yeah? He was slain him he looked at. Could I had no money like slimy? They like I may go. They say we will look and I remember heap- obey my first few classes at second city, sucking sissy. What it was and what was it like going over there? Oh man, I was coming straight again straight out of this, this world of justice. very different world to this. What seem like a- corny as road me of this, like a bunch of people, but a grown people were walking around a room, filling the space, mostly white right yeah, mostly yes, all white, yeah and then and and they were just- but it was something about it that I really loved it was like it was just. I couldn't the class itself didn't sell me right away. If I were the saw, an audio show- and I saw liked him robinson and if a few a sandwich seen a few other folks data like fire at this
in ten years, and I see them improvising and I see tim improvised twelve different due to an arm like angry like this is not part of the time. Ro a moment where nobody has taken it dear idiom then, and they never see another show like all these mucus artist good. All this is fire dislike freestyle them money. So that's why I was like super love improv because it fed my free stab and those. at him and sam art, so they're they're out there to get through this before they were Is it before the world knew that you dagger made, and but they were like they were, they were at the top. Chicago, a mere rob ray. I do it s so but did out, but then they people are saying that you know you had a pick and progress then optimal from rap. I don't give a fuck about right, if the separation no comedy yeah right. So I did all of you. I did sketch right and I did a show, but you get into the classes and you go through how many years of that I for the empire
I did. I did every every class you could take on a port all my cash into that yeah and acer, but is there a tier one if they don't you become part of the crew and then yeah we're yeah? So it's like it's like the introductory class. Then you have the uk a conservatory. it like the elevated you had to be. You have to audition for right, and then they have these different companies, and these are the best codes and different companies that you can like work and get a little money from it didn't have to What's Jonas yeah doing the show? But how far do you get? Would you do? I did it all bro I got all I got I did toward. I did he toured with tekken city. We were the first crew to go international. We went to london to perform and now having my first time out the country, yeah and- and then I was doing, I was doing stand up on the I go along with it, so you do above three doom anxieties in shit now Chicago and ass all and I hated by some zany vanity. I doubt as I didn't. I never designers and never do then is vital
in fact I did like jokes and notes. I did I did it, though after I did you ever do it when it was the theater, like the lake view, wasn't a movie theater used book that guy Ritter used to book comedy there yeah? I remember I did it, but so who you coming up with that in stand up over there? through the chicago guy. You add, you might go like rail had just arrived. Can I would to allay here Hannibal had just left the sea year. T J had just left us. Ok, MIKE holmes and ale homes might incoming weren't a chicago guys, yeah gig, but they were. They were a little bit. Hoyer yeah, yeah de ray was still kind of debate. Day was just kind of around, but he was in l, a doing the shows and stuff, and then you had like they were all kind of. Oh geez, I'm trying to remember my gueye, like of who's, that I'm sure. There's a lot of people say really do in both yeah I'm in the seas, diarrhea I got a lot, a lot of ridicule for that shit. You know what I mean and then from the comics yeah yeah. All the comics was shit that
in the gym prove people aren't going to bust your balls for doing stand up. Yes, they they bust your balls, passive aggressively. They'll, like I know, you're a stand up, but you know it's not about you. Just getting the joke is what everyone getting we have deal with that. It's not your show our show and I'm like alright man, I'm learning but you learned how to like: why find that their people they didn't. Because I'd never did, and it was certainly not the thing to do. There is definitely two different worlds. I never even thought about it, but you are not a right. You learn how to work with other people united erect a little bit now ass. It right now how to proceed in a knot alike. Connell. I think, on your feet, which you can get by being or stay sure enough by like there's a special, kind of like I love and elevated improv experience would apply. Were honest, memorabilia, easy, like we I punch in yeah, no, no, no yeah. They really do it up, yeah just to pay off a thing. You know it's like. No, no, they really just go off. Go off and yeah see this go yea how to make a real area. So when
is a when does it start to work out? Is your old man on board now that you're doing shows and shit? Oh mother, they gave them. My biggest fan our group that they buy. It started to click. They both started to click. Right around my six year was win. Was wind like I was starting to feel like strong. They were like from year wondered three. I year ass, I was ass, bad because I was you know. I was good enough, but I was bear out here. I look back and I'd be like that yeah yeah, yeah yeah, with some promise right. I was spread too thin trying to learn too many things right, but then they started, but after yeah you're for like sign a fairly, although it was still like. I feel strong, an improvement my writing here right here. In my brethren sure, big data like around your five six, was like. Oh, I know how to use muscle in writing. I too like separate the area
the new conscious of yea and that we're time where, when they feel that or like some of that fear goes away yet and you're not like jump in not on the edge I gotta get you notice or like it just happened. I miss the aid. Because the aids can, I have so much momo. Do both right there, like my showed, belong as it yeah I saw like so I dont know in it too illinois on the curb the improv. If it's as, if I'm just having a ball. Well, I dunno like. I think it it's weird, though, when you go back and forth, like I dunno how much you cut in the special, but you know you are. If we do in some crowd, work and stuff here, and there was one point in the special where there's a cut after you do some pretty good crowd work and you just go back to the bed. sort of like their amazing. You remembered yes, yes, that had happened. Oh my turf foot to cause if you can't follow your own crowd, work yeah yeah to out so that these are the two things I was worried about with the special was like. I knew I wanted to improvise and be special, but I knew I wanted to have it beat the medic and tie
I didn't want a planet right and I was like, but I I hope, I'm not chasing by laugh in the middle of the show. You know what I'm saying: obama chasing this fucking moment yeah, and I- and I hope that, like I hope, the hope that the me calling back set the moment the on, or can you know how you could be on the road he like? That was my special on the road I know They never get it back and you never get it back and never do it again. Even though was happening so many times, but then it was like the lead up to the special like the vs five hours. I practice that the moment never came and my nigger what the call back yea I am like uk I mean is one of the things that you like ie is skills that I know I have bright. I can't force it we ve kind of. Can you can yeah I mean that night. I knew I knew exactly I was doing it was like. Would I do this? Is going fucking as well fuck them up? You know just really good here and I was like some of them
I knew exactly yet and neck and ok I mean they like a trick. They do they. lemme take me works Is that what we have before us He knows what he's doing yeah exactly man I wish I had. I had a ball shooting that thing I feel like. I I enjoyed myself too much. I laughed so much more than I do or it's funny? What do you like? What do you? What do you that when you are yourself because When you're younger you have added a sort of insecurity right, but then sometimes it's like as you get older, you laugh because you're like fuck, I just did that yeah, it's kind of like yeah. Well, not exactly you know, and in so I like in that. I do like it cause. I feel like we're all my the the show really feels like we're. It's like a kind of a storyteller party, olivia yeah in the crowd work. Was you lucked out man,
at the moment. We have a good day exactly because they were like. Will I like one of the best like it out of the crowd seed issues. Amazes name escapes me, so so, I love you so much, I'm just I'm just really tired, but she was like asking me like yo, clear who you want to front and it was really skewing to my like. I don't want to plan too much yeah just makes us some couples, but you know any occupation like varying ages, a couple yeah yeah he's single foe, yeah, yeah, yeah and then whoever you want yeah yeah, that's right, see. That was our plan. That was it like. I gotta remember that, because it I don't know I don't recall any of my specials having a cedar. Who is that, not what they knew. I was gonna improvise, they won, so there you have to meet, and I was like. Really was just like your mistress and cut makes no family in the front. We're
Never I don't want to him no fan of Russell that we had a like superdome section, viii, a way I'll get excited about the ideas tight in an hour? just make she hasn't couples. I can readily see your camera brion s really what it was for you it wasn't for me. Planning was more for, like I need to make sure that you can see these people sure, because I have I have like split with agree. I was ever seen that before gas- Yes, as I wanted this as other what it It is usually they use it to cut away. know, you see the audience that do cuts have gotten away from that. I think everyone sort of like I don't want to see him at all, bro ray. I swear. I think I set out to the editor sean cause. I I was yelling notes like I don't want to see them yeah. Why are we saying yeah yeah, you know, but it is it's like it. It feels really meaty year when it's not like there's obviously natural points where
fills yes, really ass. You wish your boy like those points of sale, much smaller than like the specified. There are no I'm pinpoint anybody's polite in terms of crowd, work, of terms of like just like seeing. crowd right. So you owe me. I know that gets going out. A favour is this. I tell it don't tell me when a laugh, the year noakes row ba and in also they used to use it to cut away like you like you see all those old special further just cut. No people would bad haircut different europe day for no reason, then you see him twice: macao zack I taken up any screen. I dont know what our while we split the sea, this beer with his we're lampshade, because they wanted to be able to cut like they want to take a chunk. Gaucho Ike show the laughing guy and now we're back. We lost twenty minutes was for cutting, so we too, when you, how does it s now happen? As they now happens?
when stand up, you do an improv yeah and we got a little name for yourself in Chicago or what yeah I missed a name for myself as a guy I've. I've started to have, though, to be Lay some building. An aim must open a lay at this point. We are you. I just done the pop star, never thought of that where, around the time I met you began your s. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah and and I had just done pop so that that was like my first big movie, what is it? Oh, the movie, okay, any sandberg and and those yeah yeah, and but I was still broke. You know I have made some movie money, but I was you know I it was just enough. Is that you're not like you, your first movie or these tv spots, you're not making it up, embracing also your day jobs. I know I was. Very much like you guys, you gotta, put all your eggs. What was to engage abs are all like focused or correct. Creative focus of the case on the south side of chicago improv ryan, and then I was like animals
hiding. I was writing a commercials for this ad agency cause. They just had vocal about me yeah, and so I was just like yeah. We wrote it. We wasn't kfc commercials and some as much a the kidding but the to promote a god. Damn mother fuckers. No one asked enough. I do want know where they get mad at you. Alibaba, I wonder where he's at yeah cause. No one seems about chicken like that you're going to you're going to run into them now, you'll be getting a call. I'm right here. Man up in here, though, and I could use a job where do you live? what you are so so what they come out to chicago no. They were so they were in l, a o and- and I was at that point I was like when I go to l a I'm just trying to be on as many shows as possible. and- and I got a call and they were like you- they want to see you at a showcase. Am I
they learned enough now was an edgy shook is enough enough inner guess a few times with yeah and I had they come to Chicago and do those auditions all the time sure I could never get one in chicago cause in the improperly I was too much stand up and how around them too much I'll, tell you, but you have any friends It had a lot of friends and like no one who put you on the showcase know who no know it's okay wow, but it was a yeah. It was a thread and you got a beef ain't got a resentment now know what it was. I think I was I was. I had too many shows I mean, but like do you? Are you mad at the person that held you back, not at all nah nah nah, I don't really know who write couldn't really pinpoint pinpoint. You said no career, and I do this one I. Why does blamed Will the data folks I just blamed whoever like was head over. I you know,
like these mother fuckers won't see me, but so I saw good and then I was in that phase of my life. I was in a place where everybody went to snl, so much that I was like fuck down yeah, and then I got the audition like oh well I mean the eyes: go see what it is. That's going to be funny another show or I do know so you just one. Oh you mean in terms of how going to have the audition. You don't want psych yourself, yeah a doubling wanted it, but I I was in never going wait that even to myself at that time I was just like I'm just gonna go, I'm gonna. I had six shows that day love. That's ok, some, like the show right so dude three drinks said I walk in there I'll fucking kill it I can't believe I I did cause. I was like didn't care yeah, and then they hit me that they were like yo. That was amazing. Want you to fly in, and I was like I so then I went in had some straws like two drinks. That and I, when a four did the studio, yea and act.
Did they re giving him the call back, and then you can call me lorn yeah, you say in between that call back again meet Lauren right have a drink. You have before that, so they hit me ever like time, your high that, when the light you deleted notes, like any notes and they're like yeah just tightened up, and I was like whoa cause cause. I was tipsy as fuck, so it sounds like I know. Drinks is to have one and I have a half of one. A one and that'll be good. Before I wasn't nervous to meet lord I was I was like excited it was so much miss susie to auditions, and then you had the worn meaning. I did. The first audition debated callback annual meeting in the same in time, as he did the studio and warned the same time yeah. So how long do you wait for lorne what a day and a half, because he was flying from the hamptons in his helicopter and then decided not to come as wow said?
that's pretty dramatic waiting. You he's just in the other room and you don't understand what the fuck is going on here. You got. Helicopter treat me like a helicopter decided to go back, did want to fly down, that's what they say it out. Like me, hey, if you get, if you got a relic of the mai money you're going to raise safety ideas so that we are finally, finally, madam in a really good, We we cut off from the start. Yoga Do man he's a you know he is who he is yeah. That's true like I, you know I that was demystified for me when I talked to him because I didn't get the show- and I held it out. I was at a weird bitterness about it. For decades he agreed for an interview, and he explained to me what happened. It was a good enough explanation, but you do realize that, no matter how rich he is or whoever the hell, you think he is, or whatever he's done, he's still a guy that just goes to work at that building game runs a t v show yeah dude and he loves doing it and he's like an a, and he just saw it and he's like focus on a show or magazine show,
So some committee, now you boys funny that in the special when you talk about them as an hour like specifically white away. yeah yeah, but I never thought of that. But it's kind of true it is it's. It's just the way that we, the way that we look at where most black culture looks at in living. Color is the way that snl fans russia, as we have not always like what two seasons gay seasons but there's like, but there they come in, and I am not saying this is data? Does not fans of arkell is that your answer, but if you put a pie, chart together right, they'll, be majority white and that's why we're here? Because it is like it's it's interesting because its do it. It's the eighty two show yeah and the is that living color was a suspicious specific cultural event for black people. Exact you know, is the way in everybody in and it was all black right, except for jimmy weird weird.
Russia is funny like a bird s. Now they ve had issues around about diversity so our documentation always fuck that work realized that the new word is rapid and take your word is representation you gotta get. I know I know I saw a pretty good now the represent everybody. Now I will say out as part of the most diverse the verse air there of a vast and others have been ineffective. very diverse. Now, can you just you just leaving now yea I was always debated. This is this is before I knew the contract, but I was always liked by get it for years, I'm done yeah and I was screaming well years forever and then you get in there, and you know, and it's it's that I oh I've always loved that job as much as I hated the job. I think it's. What makes it a beautiful place to work? rise. It keeps you just feeling some yea and working for yet you're in it.
lit up. Man live it's real time it is not like. Does not alignment in the competitiveness of the week wait to see what gets on what doesn't get on. If you're going to be on anyone's going to do your shit yeah exactly it's it's it's! It's that whole thing and you're you're creating in a vacuum to in a way cause yeah cause. There's so many things you can't get away but to try to get away with the browser. I say right as though in that way hours man, I don't want to leave until I've. I've learned everything I can from this place, sure you know and and then you know when it came down to this year to summer. I I mean this year. I lost my last one of my best friends, sorry about that. Dude was the terrible man, I'm sorry jack. Yet I am is amiss him so much in and what we did together. It was so fire and they did their yeah yeah yeah. That was a gay man, yunkers acc guided.
How many storm we met him. I met him a few times and he said some nice things about a very specific joke of mine, which I was very flattered because he just seemed like such a you know use all lit up here, the shiny kind of like charisma to Amelia. man. He could control the road you to you that I will not know me know a main. Those who knows always know now is always talking shop. we always talk shit. We were here. We aren't going that way, but like it was never a no one ever thought he would actually do it so, but he had depression. Yeah I mean yeah. I should say it you should we should say his name. Night jacket on my special I wear a jk on J K. Bagginess is for us from a boy men, but did tat spark you to to get serious what your shit, it's o o been serious. Martin I mean, but the issue is now: it's
it was. I was already on my way he ice. We just used to talk all the time about about that, like about just like the depression and and like really kind of feeling yeah, we we would talk, we will talk, quiet. We we had like one like three hour conversation about just cut out everything, and it was. It was like a couple of days before. Oh my, so I was glad I was like really glad I was on a plane, delay randomly yeah and just called them, and we just were talking shit and I was so glad I had that convo with them, but us making our show and, like me coming from snl and then doing I can show that was all us and like it, SAM yea s me sam J links in common, and it was very much us and of so funny and as a man I, I don't you know, and I lost my other homie teddy ray, and so it was like bro. I got to spend time doing what I really want to do like in and cause we don't know when
go. Go with us all. Many them climbing sold at it teddy passed away. The area have that at the egg and a key in a poor man if there wasn't that long ago, either it wasn't me. It was like a couple of weeks after jack right yeah. It was. It was a tough one man. So I like brow. I want to. I want to be able to like get out work. Work would pick my friends so that we can find the reasons you get out it s. An l too yeah I'd also like I just some disraeli condominium, hemingway their lives or put in five. I felt like I was far right. It's not too will not much. That's your weight of any plan even get stuck here. I could no more no more but like. I won't were alone regret. What were you like? Everyone else is even now nah. I wasn't there. It was. It was peoples why were riding like that? Libya is not bad at all for me was like I'm going, miss those people, but that gave us more multiply
Wait lie is so many people ere they are fighting for very little time. How much longer can fight for two minutes right right. It also it's what it was always competitive, but when there's no twenty three play, Where's brow, guys like I couldn't go, do show yak and go make us. I can go. Do other stuff area. Anna wanna leave this big, better issue yeah right, you know, so it was it just. It just felt like the right thing to do, yeah and and and I'm working on some exciting shit, and I haven't focused on just kind of like stand up being a major thing like I've been juggling it, and I've definitely put all my time at the time as I possibly can, but it'd be it's going to be cool. We show you work that out yeah yeah. Let's look at the time I didn't. I never took breaks. So am my off weeks.
Now I was on the road hound in a way yeah and I ended up how's the the the self help business. You know in terms of how were you out with that. You feel good about the therapists and stuff yeah feel good. Like we're we're too, the now here and Well, I, like it a lot yeah, you know I'm a mom, my my anxiety was. It has been peaking how's that manifest for you to wake you, because you're working all the time. So what's the anxiety, what is it usually about cause? I have eighty prominent and I'm haven't. I've been having a little bit of a hard time with it cause I've had it on and off on my life, but for some reason like I, what I do is I worry batshit yeah. I worry us by Rosa so thought to dislike it. Is they read rapidly gems like they? Did you just making up shit it can make you crazy and you can't control it yeah and I'm just thinking about the worst case scenario, and it gets to a point where it's just kind of like debilitating, like I just like isolate, is that the jack have that
in yeah in his way- or he was more classic depressed- I mean honestly jack was jack- was dope it was this that he wasn't like walking around oppressive regime, but he egg, because Finally, I would only result as we need to talk about. We can speak for the dead me any my friend, but but like if I let my deep my anxiety go long enough get depressed, yeah yeah I mean I I was I was. I was dipping like every four or five days until I started like so I guess I was a manuel. Now. Oh yeah there were the alps Eliah gladly expire was yet again. Never goes Lois, I was doin, ok, go alone. I just thought I would have liked every every like every other week, I'll just have a day or two from this. not all see people. You don't say I like that. It that way until I was
there somebody and they're like hey, you know why? Don't you try this and I was always scared of it. Changing like oh you mean the pills, yeah, yeah and but then like this is like super mild and it just yeah. It's not bad yeah and and and and I took it and it I was like. Oh my god, people feel like this yeah. I don't I feel like that. Wow! Oh, that's, oh you've got the right, one yeah, you know what I'm saying so that that changed everything- oh good! Well, that's great man and what what got what he workin on now movies yeah man, I was aware that the special, but then again to come about products were broadly village, oh yeah worker on one with us for audible with you can even you're working with you're going to be working for lore and the rest of your life as I'm alive bad. I can't get away from them and I love the dude
we're doing cyber monday, so it will be a movie we're shooting at they're doing the deals now so yeah. I can say alright, alright as soon good and I'm and I'm working with some with some folks. I come back to tell you who, okay about what we're working on the tv show, good and and and a movie. I went to a horror comedy some. Where are your hat and called marlon wanes you have there. She may love this out and said I. a moment I just did. I just did a cordon within him and I we get, we have fun. You relate to write. This can help a bust, his body laughs. Could we did respect together, so we became for us? yeah but he's in another movie, that's kind of scary, but the family scary movie. He didn't write it. He just didn't either. I get that check. Man he's funny. Family scary movies are always fun like ooh, yeah, ooh, yeah yeah. It is light, but how about I say that modern, if you ever lose it is. I say that, because I'm a true horror fan so yeah. I look at family movies and I was like oh that's, soft
as nice as horror for the suburbs? Right? If you like the har? Oh, I love it cause. I think I think I love it because I've been washed, for everybody. Also, it has the same kind of like rhythm is as common. It does actually yeah and like I I can deal with it. Sometimes I get a little impatient with her really yeah, because I can just get out of a guy. What are we doing? what are we? What are we doing just going to take? I get I get impatient if it's like, no meaning to like there's like a show out now called slasher, which is just a guy killing people for no reason for it like that. Like no story, just no story dislike just differences, as we begin slashing of murder? Poor air like this? Is that funding grow? I get it I gotta get into more than my girlfriend likes it I mean. Some of it, I like you, but maybe there, some old school shit right, there's manner,
some really good shit. The barbarian is a grey area. Egg eg, superdome, doktor sleepers is one such as how we address shows or move visited these a movie, ok, yet I love I like a light or too because there's you it is easy to fall to the people's being. Heck does yet assured Cod is so many like thing of indonesia is done, yet it's all been done, so it's really challenging to make. Will you do as I see it and that's it? That's the plan. American right now and you get after good to talk to you may as well. I thought you were and finally know what that got there. Yeah! That's right or do you live? Are you going to stay in new york? Are you gay, I'm I'm in harlem okay that must stay at harlem? and up, but I might have I mean I'm gonna, be me being alive, but sorry I see over there, yeah alright, buddy read the show. The comedy show the special. Why am I like this stream
on h, b, o max and if you could, please hang out for a second. academy award, winning writer director Martin Mcdonough is back the mind that brought you in bruges. Three billboards outside ebbing Missouri has in all new original dark, comedy the benches of into Shirin pharaoh and Brendan gleason are to lifelong friends who find themselves at odds when one suddenly ends their relationship with alarm in consequences. The we won best green played the venice film festival and common pharaoh, one best actor and it's getting great reviews, don't miss the bank. He's of into Shirin from search wide picture now playing and select theaters get tickets today. Yes, our folks, today's archive episode that we are highlighting is, sewed six, forty two with michaela watkins. Now Macao
walk and is a close friend of of of mine. She was a close friend of of lynch outlines as well but in the episode we talk about how she is one of the few former s cast members, who is honest, open about how she didn't have a great time at snl, and this is a little bit of that I like lorne a lot. I respect them, but I didn't want to be I here's the thing I didn't want to. I thought our relation, ship would happen organically. So I never pushed one with him right. I never kissed ass. I never an area, I was really intimidated by him, but I felt like over time I'm gonna get to know him as a person now get to know me as a person and- and I trusted that that would happen right. So I I never never kissed. ass ray. I never saw see. People out in every once in a while. You know one of the customers like chagos thank Lauren, stay high, learn, you know, make sure you start by or maybe not the cast, but sometimes it
producers should go say I learn and I'd walk up to It will be like high and is like oh and how are you doing? having a good time like yeah. I am really happy be here Your tie, ok I'll talk to you later froze so the real reason why you didn't necessarily kiss ass. There wasn't good at it. And also like bill haters said you know the fact You're gonna go. Do this movie in is letting you after go. Do this movie or whatever, which movie I was backup plan, and he said you should you should think lauren cause. You know I went timed in here. I could tell, I don't know, maybe bother all I don't know he didn't know get over here. Issues like maybe you honor, you know, and I just Wasn't walking down the hall and you sometimes see him coming, and every part of me is like go the other way. Just turn turn on your heels go run move, but I was like no I'm going to I'm going to take
bills. Advice. I will go. Thank him. You know, and and and by the way bills incredibly swimming in half grown p. I don't usually give it by other new early night of empty, so so I know it was coming from a nice place, but I went over to foreign which allow any leg you know warming into a conversation like hi learn. I just want to say thank you so much for letting me do this movie. I am really excited to go. Do this and you're just very nice- and also I do- is that you do do you have a lot of shirts like that? I, like that one, that's very nice on your body and he just kind of looked at me anywhere. Okay, like just ok, it was like this guy hates me any. Never. I like I said I never had that one on one race sit down at his office and he gets to know me as me, so I just I could never
Who is miss fired every time I started so yeah there you go mikhail Wilkins episode, six, forty two and that's available for free on all podcast, absent platforms. You can get every w E F episode ad free, with a dvd, have plus subscription click on the link in the episode description or go to deputy of pod dot com and click on w e f plus tonight, I'm in dallas text Is it the majestic theatre? Tomorrow friday, I'm in San Antonio, at the tobin centre, for the performing arts for to show and on saturday, I'm in Houston, at the column, theatre were them centre. Then I'm in long beach, California, at the carpenter performing arts, on Saturday november, twelve eugene Oregon at the holt centre for the performing arts on friday we're eighteenth and bend oregon at the tower theatre on Saturday. Amber nineteenth. In December I mean Asheville north carolina at the orange peel for two shows on Friday December.
and in the nashville tennessee I'm at the James K, polk center on Saturday December third and my h, b o Shall taping is a town hall in new york city on thursday december eighth, go to deputy of pod dotcom, slash tour for all dates and ticket him and before we go, I want to remind you that we're sponsor by simply safe, don't miss your chance to save big on the only security system. I recommend get fifty percent of any new, simply safe system at simply safe dot com. Flash w T have today this is their biggest. down the years or don't wait that simply saved outcome. So I stability. If there is no safe like simply safe ok, now here's some guitar that I did at some point hmm, and The
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Transcript generated on 2022-11-04.