« Armchair Expert with Dax Shepard

Alicia Keys

2020-04-06 | 🔗
Alicia Keys is an American musician, singer, composer, actress and pianist. Alicia joins the Armchair Expert to discuss overcoming resentments, her pattern of people pleasing and releasing the notion that being overworked equals success. Dax relates to Alicia's love of her grandparents and Alicia talks about a life lesson that taught her the necessity of boundaries. The two talk about fear of abandonment, the mix of work and friendship and Dax proves to have good phone game. Alicia’s new book More Myself: A Journey is out now.
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Welcome. Welcome. Welcome armchair expert, I'm Dan Shepherd joined by Monica Monsoon hello day. I wish were keeping track of what day it is day, a hundred quarantine, conifers, icon boy, you no one tiny sliver of upside for us, as we have access to some awesome people that have more time than they normally would ye our another location yeah, maybe just as we have opened this up to doing it view zoom yeah, but at any rate what an amazing guess we have today a leash keys. She is a musician singer, composer, an actress pianist. Do I say that right, pianist, yeah com? a train pianist keys was complete
songs, but eight twelve and was signed at fifteen years old by Colombia, records another vendor kin, Yeahs Attard, this stack of wonder: can she has fifteen competitive, Grammy award seventeen end of a lazy, p image, awards nine, billboard, music organs and b to your words, and she has a new book which I have read and I absolutely love it's called more myself a journey in its out now and I couldn't recommended enough. It's fantastic and Jesus he's. Goddamn lovely! Isn't she those special I now to please- enjoy the ever talented Alisha keys. We are supported by data. Monica, do know the most unexpected thing that happened to me this week about time that was unexplored but it wasn't fun. Now I try
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I think the radiant reviewed addressing the view, and I now people are gonna sing. Let me yeah has ever done that. Have they just an interview with you, where they sang the whole time you, your own songs, begging, never said a word was always songs. I, like your participation, would be as an audience member that so much I would actually enjoy that thoroughly. Can can you guys hear me well, We can hear you re, but I can't see you, which is very disappointing, because I know- nobody likes like they pretend like they like legs as you know, in these times, were grateful for zoom. We are really likes to like me.
Up on a camera with people they never met before in a clear and they have glow of yourself. I ate like us feed me is my worst nightmare. I'm item like what angle works with this nose. I can't figure it out and I dont want to be in selfies. Would people I makes me and secure and I hate it That said, Alisha, keys, I fancy myself as someone who had great phone game in junior high, like I attribute most of my success with women to a really dialed in phone game, with me saying. Yes, Do you mean I? I agree, I don't know you but like I would have got your number and junior high and I would- Europe and you gotta, maybe we're ninety minutes. I could talk to your offer. Ninety minutes, Ok, so you're you're, a long talker does that's not exactly phone game. Dashes long talk in the other party the point was always thoroughly amused
engine in a tree. I could see what let me ask you this it. Can you see me Mega again in going, there were good to go back on the Upper Ormond Yo Yo Yo, though we would love to see you if its by without Z, because I'm attracted to you, but let me just backup Monica, is also monitoring and I dont like how we look now we like how each other looks, but we personally when we look in the mirror, lie not not what I would appear crazy about and not wild now. How feel about how you look when you look in the mirror. It's ok depend on a moment. You know, like I spend a little time and had a low then I then I'm feeling uncomfortable how I love o goes is like now currently how my hair is they up? But if I go get my hat I will put in the face. Should I get my hat, I would love it just wanted to into my moments I want to see like you know, if you start,
in a book while we're talking that'll be a cue to me that I'm not a stimulating. You conversation I write out. Ok, I hold on highly way maxim my hat or can't way army. I hope it's a somber arrow, bag, key and now, when the somewhere row, video, dented Rambo Randall by air awesome. Thank you for talking to me. Thank you for connecting with me. Is this social distancing distanced enough or are we know on the distance of the Social Europe, I'm gonna, I'm not gonna blow up. You're you're on your actual coordinates, bs we're in excess of a hundred miles away, so I think, were ordered.
Get where low went around the issue of EU, we lived together, we ve been quarantine together. God areas, Monica Monica by weird coincidence, was living at our house for about four weeks before this all started, because she has her own medical issues. She had a seizure and then she want to make sure that if she had one again Simone's there's care for her. So she had already met anything though it just worked yeah. Why? What s perfect worked perfectly seizures can have an upside down, a couple things about you! One! We watched your nickelodeon thing, yes, that Chris yeah that's right in, and I wasn't saying there's just because I knew I was about to interview what I say like mid song, full body chill three times over. Chill. Retie was unbelievable. God you're gonna get best a man like there's nothing better of a compliment than full body- shows that
all that ever matters that started in the had like came in the ears started in the forehead and then radiated down all the way to the tipps of my toes goose. Herr standing on add yet end, also, we are doing it from your home or somewhere ages like that's just what she sounds like so pure, I think the expectation lower because it was low fire and then all of a sudden another, namely that song those call underdog, underdog underdog You know used our plan, your voice kind of like an instant. I mean it's a generic to say, but I mean really like you'd here, like a sack so lower something there just as specifically in play and such words ass? Well, ass, a yes! Yes! Yes, I love that so much tat is so cool. That's so damn glad you got to see it and honestly I felt the same. Wade's, who I am
had a chance to watch it back. I was also just really happy with the way that it felt a as when you're in the mix. You don't you know you Oh good. I know I felt good about it, but you don't get a chance to be apart from it and just kind of listen to it, and I was very happy. At two. So thank you now have to imagine. There's songs that our like our more autobiographical or their there about something you care specific, equally about, like sometimes I imagine you're, just in a good mood, anyone in upbeat song and empowering song or whatever the thing is, but surely there's some right that are pretty emotionally centred if level worked out well for me to just kind of like right, a song. Is it there's? Never that's, never gone well for me in and I've done it. I've tried. I say: oh you know, or men thinking about this kind of topic in this seems relevant in me right now, but it may not be. Like super personal, and I'll and on trial, put it together in and it sounds good wrong with it, but it just doesn't really go there. So you have to say that all those
more definitely to your point, more touchy, you know like something about is very touchy at the moment and that is triggered, but more of all the songs have come from somewhere. That means something otherwise I just find that it doesn't end of ever make in the record, because it Ghana does follows off eventually year Never did it all compatible. So I write a lot man there's some scenes. I right where they just I like blinking, there's five pages written and then there's other ones where it's like I'm killing myself for four days to write two pages to get through the exposition or whatever. Is it coming like that at all, exactly exactly eight the cool thing is that what I think I've learned, though, is trying to judge the creative process as much because, even though some of the songs are like water, raining down is just so natural. And then some of us have the craft and re craft and retry and replay in red and unlike killing
so because I'm like, I cannot believe it. Why is this songs give me so much trouble but then, finally, when it finds its way, then it was worth it so I try my best not to judge the creative. Says right like you're, not going to say on this didn't come to me like this. It must not be meant to be be good, I'm cool craft in the thing, You know crowded appease item, okay, I'm with that. I give so little advice feel qualified, but Only good piece of writing advice I have is give yours. Permission to write something shitty like the hurt in writing this starting right once you're. Writing! Guess what your pride not going right, some that shitty! But if you just allow yourself to sit down right some shitty, I think times great things can happen. You saw right about that. That thing a ladder. The things we are dealing with is the fear that we're not good enough, which we all you know, feel that injustice variants that and so of course, talk yourself out of it does. Then you don't have to prove. You are right that you actually you weren't good enough, the M, but I do
for me even there's Tarzan, sat down right and it has been shitty and alive. I've got a little like it and maybe months later I'll, come back and the whole of the song, but this one phrase from that. One time came a cat, and it meant everything you needed to mean, and I and I realize that, even though I wrote something that was kind of not what I was hoping for a nighttime, I needed to do it, so I could get to this time. So that's kind of a cool thing to ah now do you live in any fear could certainly comedians. We all live in fear that we have a shelf life and I think, there's a weird paralleled soon between singers, which is generally the source of comedy, is like you're getting shit on by your boss, your penniless you're, uncomfortable carroty insecurity. You feel tat
down, do a lot like there's all these people are observing, but then that the danger of getting successful is now life gets kind of more comfortable. You can kind of control it more you're, not the victim of so many things and used to start worrying, like myself separated. I can't write anything funny yeah, is definitely an artist experience and also a thing is there's been programme and that we ve been given in a lot of ways. I mean that that's what I think about there all the time- and I recognise the programme and a lot especially now programme and are we being given his like? Oh, you know, Starvin artists, you know he's phrases that we're were taught that you know that the less you have the more creative you're gonna be which the trust mean not that there's not truth to those things. Like those definitely truth, and totally see why they are shared by I think Those things get our head and there is therefore, and they walk. I should probably get to successful. As you know, there has been an easy. All these other people is assessed with people are crazy, so may seem like very successful people.
Crazy. I don't want to be like that John Sonia. Sometimes I think all It gets in your way, and then you subscribe to this story that you have some type, a limit, me, too trust me. I've been trying to break out my own personal limit that I put myself for like a long time, which is a lot of what is in this book. This conversation that I'm haven't with myself and just with each other I think we all experience this, but for assure me I can always be for myself did the lead It's that I like put on myself. Thinking that it was humility that. The cry light and my own arm just humble I dont need dad or it is a matter that doesn't happen. It was the same thing as not starting to right, because I was protecting myself in case something here, and I was just like nor good. I don't even need all that it's fine yeah like shutting everything down before. I even try to do something at all, and is the so
yeah, maybe even if you had a little like the top one hundred songs ever written, I mean I have to imagine. Eighty percent of them are either gonna, be about falling in love or leaving love right as we get kind of healthy, and you find yourself in a healthy relationship in a marriage, and it's like, oh you know, I'm not either gonna be ending this or starting this in her first songs, it's true, I mean there's so much to write and they so many perspectives and I've been that's. My favorite thing about songs and song. Writing is that its little they like how a person's visa thing as to how comes to life, and I just want to be so fascinating, especially when I'm just sending or watching other artists or other writers are things I've gotta make man. I would never thought of it like that. I thought of it. Like this. You know I mean, so I think that to your point, that I love,
The challenge- and I think what happens, maybe even as life progressive just period I've found is there a lot of loss, but I find that is, is things that I'm losing because growing. So it's a different version of loss unit. I mean it left me because I don't need it anymore. He answer in sometimes it kind of presents itself or they even their anger- that maybe you feeling your relationship as you very pleased with it. He's gone well, but I have a lot of anger for myself or oil at an angle, the things that I find myself continuously doing or patterns that I keep repeating things like that pull that out, and so I think the prospective definitely has, but I do know what you mean and artists always feel like is about to be the end for them. Yet even somebody's prolific as you that's like weirdly, comforting, again because there is endless fodder, because I know about you, but I I love learning the same fucking lesson multi
pool times in a year and I'll go, oh my god, that's right! I'm supposed to work out and be of service of people, and then I'm happy and I'm like. I know that I already know that Many times do you have to learn that I know that pisses me off so bad pisses me off like for a lotta years. I had a really big people, please and problem with trying to figure out is that a woman thing or the main thing so maybe I could they tell me, do you think that's a woman thing or human thing. I think it's both. I think it's a human thing, but I think suicidally there's more pressure on women to be perfect to end agreeable like a ball all these things and leg man if mare, intimidating, they can still be like, while there is still something that you can be drawn to about them? But if your woman, I don't love, you watch the Hilary documentary but that whole documentary is like
my. I got the other one and it's all about that. The union's me. Oh, she can't wait. No matter what I can't guys it'll be labelled as either she done speak up enough or she's a bitch, or you know my whatever lane she pigs, there's gonna be some well. Why, these include me, I guess I'm ridiculous judge me spits election she's, not emotional enough right, but then, if a woman's emotional, then she's hysterical and can't run no countries show you know a rational, yeah, yeah yeah, she's sterical she has emotions, will never motions. Why didn't you have? Emotions can't win at all. It's tough so so from man's persuade the because I have said this before that I feel like this is a woman's plight and certain men have gotten kind of upset with me. You know, and I can understand how they also could feel like that too some degree, but
just wondering as a man eggs you feel like. That is also a man's plight or not so much I We know a lot of men that have that kind of code dependent people, please, sir, and I seen them anymore. That just can't protect themselves. They can't say no or have a boundary out of the fear that there they won't be like through the all these things, and so I certainly seen a member boy yeah. I think it's definitely. I think, there's some nature and there's some nurture and that stew that make were particularly susceptible, though that yeah it's like the body image thing were. I think men have body image issues too, of course, but I think as more societal pressure for women It does not remove the men's play to or take away that they're going through the same experience, but it's just a man the cultural layer is a little different. I think For me, I've read a good deal of your book as awesome
I'm in bed. It's like one thousand one hundred and thirty in my car, read it for ten minutes and get a feel for what it is girl. I could not stop reading it. I swear to God. I stayed up till like one hundred and thirty in the morning so much. There were so many things I felt like I really related to their some geographic similarities. So, like your maternal and parents, or from Michigan originally right exactly and then they moved to Lido and then so, Christians or families from Cleveland and Chris his father was in radio, then became a news director in Nagoya, emma- was a disc jockey and a new director, your mom, escaped and went to turkish I actually encourage than escaped and went to Tisch. Oh wow, but then the step that about really connected with. Was your paternal grandparents far far? Not what was it
fine man they they lived in Harlem right. You lived in house kitchen and used to go there like every other week, an hour on the weaken that probably should have been your dad's right right more. They accept by that time, but at anymore it's a long island, but I meant banana did live in Harlem and that's where they met in Harlem and my grandfather wanted to light, be the man get her a house and move out to the suburbs and she was so upset because she was my apartment. Harlem was big it in his house. So yes, but that's exactly it. So I that wasn't around and then on his weakens. I went to Papa Bobbin Grandma's house, for me is single moms, Brooklyn three kids mom the bees? Like your mom, yeah when I went to those grandparents how's that was The time I got to be a child very late
boiled me. I got the macaroni cheese. They bought me Ding dong. It was their us like. Oh, this is what the other kids in my neighborhood, our experience this would have been waiting for years is another level of love I mean it was, is another level of ability it's a love in a different way, because everything wasn't so on their back and on their shoulders and heavy and in a worried and everything like that, and- and so even even five. I write about him and in the book- and he was this italian detective do through and through like he would have fedora and You know the rain coal and you know his it was always items everytime I hold in the gun is guy, you know, and but he would drive all away be their leaned against the car. When I came out the building and the first thing like that's my girl, every time and he gave me that, like light in that type of welcoming
you know I never like, I wasn't supposed to be there or nobody wanted me. It was like this beautiful love, an you added one little detail, as is everything to me, which was he was early every time he was waiting for me I didn't buy for here is Papa here and he was there ready, because dad's are late, especially they, those those at zero certain dad's, tend to be late and that's ahead. It come with a fine. They come around eventually because my relationship with my father has evolved. And I'm really grateful for it, and I am glad that we ve been able to find a way to really be friends. You know, there's someone I realized. Ok, you don't have to be my daddy. We can let that go, but We could actually be friends. We can know each other and get to know who we are as a woman and as a man and like respect that yeah had there beside me one time and I'm so gratefully said this. I was like I met the point. I think I might be
with this trying to have a relationship with my dad. Just if I get frustrated, I get let down. I'm Disappoint Balboa. Here It's not about your dad. Are you the type of person that doesn't dog to their dad? I forget him: do you think The type of person people describe you'd like oh yeah? He doesn't talk to his dad and I was like fuck. I think, you're right that I'm the type of person that no matter what would continue to try reach out, it would be cool is like I'm, not I'm now harbouring all of these things, yeah? I had it. I had a similar experience with somebody that shared some perspective like that to me that to my mind, and it changed everything she said. Ed. Like I'm always number the point it like a noise me disappointed. I'm going to ask him to come to the thing he's going to say is going to come to the thing and he's not going to show up to the thing, and then I tell myself: I'm not going to be disappointed because it's fine and no he's not going to show up and then he doesn't show up, and I'm still so pointed myself, because I'm my why you need at I'm just over. At wishes. I forget it and then
turn up to another level. When I had kids because I was like you know what you're not going to do, you're not going to do this shit to my you- may ask any you know it's all so that like elevated and she so why do you keep asking him to do things that you know he's not going do, and I was I She was egg. Is like yours setting him up to disappoint you, you that you know you have these different. And you know you can call this friend for when you need to vent- and you ve got this friend when you need to like me to an appointment on time and then like that. You know the great you setting him up to not come through for you. It change every now- and I was able to look at it. From that perspective- and I was I why am I doing that, like I'm China, finish him or something and in a way I was what I think People do this in relationships alot, where they, especially of people that have a hard time, accepting that their loved that they're having a hard time believing their worthy of love,
so then these are creating tests for the person that they can pass now. You know and it was the so that changed so much for me and I was able to start a relationship with him in a new way were based on knowing who he is a prison in accepting who he is the person we do this thing, what we try to make people who we want them to be who they actually are, and so I was able to leg. Look at that message. You know what I must stop asking them to do. The thing that he's probably- not that greater doing it just, and this is how it goes and I'm as an ensued, a thing that I notice goes well and I want to start doing that we started to be over the Kenya than I good and you know. So I so d I thought in the look, you did a really good job of being gracious about his position, which was he was twenty, Daban. This was not a plan, I cannot see this. Found out when your mom had made the decision. Yes, some I'm gonna keep this baby right, and so I think you're, just you
you're pretty gracious about recognising, like others, wasn't his poor per se, so you know, it's hard and how do you put teaches you had to be apparent at what point you get the memo like. Ok, here's all the guidelines of how you parents, Nobody knows how to do this shit, it's literally super, refusing it's scary- it's totally whole new world, and then the stakes are so high. You know like you guys, are married, a new plan to live the rest of your life. Leipzig, that's terrifying! Xenia like oh, my god. What do I do it that way, so is its eye Obviously, in the beginning, I was totally in all this often he did in almost all the shared not talked about that too, because that's fairy, I had a right to feel like that I also realise that, though I like the only person, that's angry heeded and feeling this wrath, that you swear your sling and everywhere. Is you
yeah because he doesn't have a clue. Did you feel like those? How does he know he's goin on luminous live children, harbouring all their anger and end like darkening my spirit holding onto something, but look is the journey and it is hard this area. This is easy, it's layered and all that, but our finally getting there you know, I think, and I am glad that it came ungracious, because you know that's how I feel at this time. In my life, We have a saying in a way which is having resentments is like drinking poison, hoping your enemy dies exact Lillian. That's right, you're like managing yourself to get even with them it's while the nevertheless are fairly them here, and even in the credit me, you don't even need a crowd, discredit, a
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That was an you can save time. An stress, effortlessly, hello, fresh cuts out the stressful meal plan, an prepping most of their dinners can be on the table and just about thirty minutes or even twenty men with their quick recipe options a fresh helps. You eat sustainably, with proportion, ingredients, amines or less proper. You and less food waste go to hell of fresh dot com, Slash Dax, ten and use kodaks ten for ten free meals, including free shipping. That's hallo, fresh dot com, Slash Dax, ten and use Dax ten for ten free meals, including free shipping. So you're up, obviously known your music from the beginning and on my enormous fan, I'm not you he can, then I think you're just so hyper towns and all these ways, but thinking it was really in seemed to hear your story, particularly for me, it was a great interests, is just recently I become obsessed with Whitney Houston? I just went on board at the marauding one of the,
humanity. There's two of em out of you seen either of them. I seen one ones like the unapproved, and when I think of the approved some like right, I just felt av. The identity thing like growing up one way being sold is another way being exceeded, but from the black community in a way that was devastating for her addiction. Everywhere, like the duality of being this person onstage and than this purse INA it. It's experience. I found it so heartbreak and I just wanted to rescue that girl, you know weirdly. Your situation does not that different in that like group, in a very dicey area in house, the chin, and then very very young age I mean like was the last time you talked to a nineteen year old. I just ass. Monica this morning was the last time you talk to a nineteen year old, well,
my husband and I we have a beautiful, blended family. So, together we have five children all so he and I have two together and then there's if eleven a thirteen year old and a nineteen year old, When I think about him, his name is NAS and he's also an art is any and he's a producer and his writing stuff and he's. And in a lot of ways, sometimes we're talking. I'm literally talking to like my frickin reflection in some ways, because you know battling with school in China. Figure out is a valuable for him or promises, take away from his opportunity to do is aren't you know the whole thing that we are trying to figure out as we're going. So I have to say: I speak to a nineteen year old, more often than that It sounds like you're talking to maybe the heights of vat example and I'm not trying to be disparaging to nineteen euros. I'm just I'm remembering myself at nineteen in the notion that at nineteen years old
you were- and I guess even prior to that you- already entered into a record deal Colombia right and they were basically doing to you what they had done, the Whitney now, but you were put in a position where you, this amazing songwriter piano player singer and they pretty much just wanted you to sing and made right the songs and they decide what your music was gonna be like when it went south and then you fought- and he said no in this region- I do not think I'll be right. My own staff and amazing and I just think like I am your old. How on earth was a nineteen year old able to stay there? Orson have the competence and yours I mean it's really amazing. I think about that but two and I think about in two ways. First, we think about it is there was one person in my life, my manager, at the time as they will give Robinson who was really on my side
He really really was and he knew TAT I had something special and he also you know just what for the bullshit, and so I think that would have been that much harder for me He was like gnarly show. You really should probably do it. They say we turn it this money and we don't want to risk it. I would probably maybe I don't know than harder I find that that ability to say, like I'm, fighting through this but there's been other times later in the future, that I had to make my own choice, singular, but no one else on my side, so I did happen ability to do that and the second way think about that. Thinking a lot of ways and of u fine. As too I find when I reflects back. I was more myself right about that. Eighteen nineteen twenty speech. I was very clear what I didn't want a new it. So clearly there was nothing that could convince me. Otherwise. I was like stupid.
I do not know any better. I couldn't tell me anyway, and I had no taste of any success or something that would kind of sway me in any way or not. I knew that was there and I was very clear later. I became much less clear and became more convoluted. Well now. I would imagine just guessing button once you transfer into a zone where you're trying to protect success. Verse is trying to achieve success. Its Dyson right is so deep is so the amount demons that your battle in the amount of opinions that your battle in the amount of self worth that struggling with the amount of doubt The amount of bad people pleasing as you get into that habit cause your light. Well Please I'm writing a please pleasing, don't they have to like it. This whole idea of people like everything you do and
Scary, scary, Gee sword. I will cut you so bad, and so I think that's it. Actually that crossover between protecting what I had finally achieved and Difference between that and like dreaming was to different mental states. Yeah. It's. I think it's a real weird transition for people talk as you Your first album was so enormously successful and, Of course, it is well worn a pattern when they call back the sophomore curse or something where you are album specially the first one's been so successful. Can be so overwhelming for a lot artist that they just either can't write the album or, in the other, frankly, say- is that your first album you had spent nineteen years writing yeah in ways the second line yeah the second, when you got like six monetary up, right, right, yeah and then at Album diary is
You know by all accounts, just as successful and just as many Grammy's and all this stuff in you really did it, but I am curious. What was the matter? it's all space. Going into the studio after them, the one album was so fantastic and everyone had celebrated you so much. Let me back up even a little further. What is it like? being in a tiny confined area record, these song, do you believe in your living room, censure or seven years old, playing a piano, and then you you shove it off the dark. And then it is, twenty million album sold and in all the nominations like France, his tail fraudulent. Do you feel like? Oh, I deserve this, or do you feel like holy fuck em, my lucky, this can't repeat itself what what happens in that? Can you even enjoy it, or is it such a big thing? The digest? You know at the time it had been so long coming. I was first sign, I was fit. Ten years old and then
went through the different transitions, Gina different labels and things changed on the business side and everyone There's one business manager, I had to say so that our never gonna come out or what I mean I would get tormented by people who would the kind of thing it was a joke leg. You probably is probably not gonna happen for you I'm and has been all this time, and I know they were joking. They had no idea that banks and, like acid, that put in my throat, you know, and I started to say: maybe you won't, maybe it can't is it ever? Could I ever Willie ever what It is add four years in a nineteen year, old life is corner of your life, You or whatever one slash, so now for you, you ve been in that quagmire for a long time, a long time, and so by the time we found kind of the right version of
we then Peter Edge and men than men, Georgia for Amazon and Clive Davison there, the by me on that thing, and that was so expensive and this idea is a whole like tremendous. No reason why any is worked out, I mean truly, I should have been on somebody shelf and now what been it. You know Jaso. So, finally, when came to this place. What was happening. I was so damn thrill, That was actually happening, that I don't remember, feeling a large amount of fear or united. I remember feeling scared about their prize. I remember feeling triumphant like see told your lasses ride and I've felt victorious in and then I think because I knew how long it had taken and how likely was that it wouldn't. You know, like you, just don't know what and it happened for you, like you, don't know, and because I came from a place that was very minimal and we were always live and patient paycheck. I was always like
so the laser focused on whatever I had to do to make this thing work, I would slip half an hour, a dad and give a shit. I would have done anything to just make sure that this thing and working so long it. Finally, and so I think that I put my head down and strap my boots. So tight I didn't see half of this shit I made I would we would have some amazing thing. The Grammy's five grandmother The next morning I was at work I didn't know what it felt like to be like why This is so cool is, I know it was a whirlwind at unaware was half the time I know ideas, but I think part of that saved me and of time to like TAT ten, to go on the Mediterranean and be celebrated
that and you can't afford that shit, even though I remember the first time I saw a magazines in Europe and I saw a magazine and is the firs fallen in the whole thing, and I was in Europe- is one of the first times and everything was exploding and I saw this magazine and it said my picture. The cover any said, the hundred and eighty nine million dollar girl and, I said, I was in sea and now hundred eighty me so I'd. Never efforts I even dawned on me like the level of mine You know what I mean. I don't need them and with the business actually accruing but when you saw that did you think that's a lie or be holy shit. I made that money where the fuck it I've been robbed. I didn't quite Phil. I was wrong.
I didn't know at that time. Obviously aware that you are you a share in the other people they the larger share. And, finally, you find yourself to a place where you can even those scales, because it's like ie long enough that You start to equalize it and I guess got that, but I was more shocked that It was literally the number I just couldn't even fathom that that was enormity of where I was creating it. Can I just add that more than any other products, I think have said this on your before, but more than the other product, a movie even if I wrote it directed at starred in it.
There are so many people involved, but the notion that you literally sat in a room and then out of that you open your brain up in your throat up and then out of adding rated a hundred eighty nine million dollars s huge concept. I think that is something that really special about music in, and you are right that it is somewhat casino and I have done film, I'm always, and ah, I'm always laughing. I like what weekends off? What is this shit? We don't get any holidays where work in every every million years ago. Work is this where the work it sounds like it's a weirdly probably was a blessing that you're getting your asking for four years, because I bet when it happened. You did feel least like you earned it. I did struggle with this question of. Like did I deserve it. And I don't know why I'm in a definite put my time- and I definitely put my ours- and I definitely put my blood, sweat and tears in, but
still wonder it as I do. I deserve all this and I would I would talk to my friends, who that, because strange because we were living in almost like two different strata spheres, just by nature of life. And I didn't know how to share with them what I was experiencing, because I didn't want them to feel anything toward me or left down as if you I ate projected that they would treat me this way. Maybe they would have? Maybe they wouldn't have, but I chose that they would inside never let them fully in, and I even today I realized I didn't nurture a lot of my own. So spaces because as I was. Concern that they would make me feel left out of bad or left behind or wouldn't understand I didn't have a lot of like community, because I kind-
just assumed that they would feel this way. So that's been a new reality for me that I've realize I maybe China done that so I relate so much to you. The girl, my my new year's resolution, was to say putting a negative spin on everything and I really did track it back to the fact that I have all my hence I grew up with that, we're all from very modest that brown and so if they found out. I got this car per se. I go Oh yeah, I got this car, but due to cause this much too it covered. It add all these bad things on yours, like yea, I got this house, but then blah blah blah in that. I realize was colouring my own expense. With all of it, because I'm I'm trying to add a shit layered everything's, so people are mad at me, so people can relate if I get as gave you like a major fucking five right there Gazette is exactly it. So you feel me
and I got to say the one thing singers have. I don't think people really understand how isolating is. I think, Taylor Swift Stock Marathon of you seen that, but that who was amazing down Netflix right now, it's great and yet you really get a glimpse of the isolation, because again specially for You and she won't do it. Just like you said a lot with a piano and feeling all this awkwardness with your friendship circle that no one teaches you how to navigate and they can do really really solitary right. Yes, very uneven, even like gone on tour I'm on my modest Torah people talk much more grandly than than I even I in a modest soaring environment- can employ a hundred people. A hundred people want or easy and there's only maybe ten people, stage, but stagehands oughta trucks or hotels, although behind the scenes all the stuff, we like a hundred people around employing and I'm by myself, because I may wait. I've
hang out with like the guy who packs of the guitar and puts it I mean maybe but he's working later than me. He breaks to show down and then ok and it showed the ban I'm kind of a then I'm doing like a hundred thousand meeting greeds and they go back to the hotel and are exhausted, and then I'm all my own bus, because it's better that way you need. You need some space and you want to have time to sleep and you got just so they it. So it's definitely oftentimes junior hotel, room and you're, just like. Where am I who am and nobody's with me it definitely and feel very, very very eyes and leaning and you say in your book you say I eat your life is in two chapters. In a way there's like before that, album comes out and then there's after that comes out, nay, The one thing that I think my minimum, my mother, Is it really well with me, since I was a kid and she was always so man pimple on your face. Right now is going to keep you humble like she just look that much, and you know just simple things that she would give me a great perspective on even with just you know how to.
The other. People was just based off of how do you want to be treated like? Would you like that? If someone did that to you- and she would ask me like that, six hundred and fifty seven that's how you You like that astounded at EU and our village. I guess not. I think, because it would just her and I, and because we were so loners in Heaven and make it all figure it out together. She deaf and the game, it owes jewels at last a long time and I think gave me that stability, even through the mayhem and chaos and all the weirdness that naturally kind of his created from this work, I feel like. I always knew how to make Spain, the sanity and really if over that, because a right to the point of Whitney in the addictions, indifferent PETE, you know if, if I did have more of that energy around me, I can eat Let see how you lead their way. It sounded like mom, Basically, you are obviously her child, but also Heyward team. It's a mess,
were in house kitchen, there's a shitload of stuff goin on right outside the door. So there's expectation I note my mom sent me down as like: hey your kids, but it's the fall. In this, so either we're all were all arrive or we're not gonna end. You guys are gonna play a big role in that in its You know in one way out. I of course resent that I wish. I had a more carefree childhood, but then in another hand I was like you say in your book, like always a little older than I was Numa, clay and I've yeah. That became a value and there's a competent I feel are up self dependence. But I have that I am grateful for the same. I'm really glad about that has dug, is weird and interview crazy to and does no coming back. You know what I mean So I am grateful now Your mom was in a singer, but she was an actress. Did it ever get dicey that, like you were kind of you know, do
Nothing. Clearly she had set out to do you Personally, I felt that I do know that there is surely a kind of competitor nature between mothers and daughters and and just overall, the relationship can can be a little bit in sting, are strained or- and she is definitely a very strong minded human thy. She mean whatever she says, is right and don't even think about challenging, add or haven't another opinion. They do yourself a favor and just agree. So so I think there was a very difficult energy to navigate for me and a lot of ways is being super young and as it as a young human. You know. Of course you listen to your parents, of course, and then start to develop their muscle of having my own opinion. I think in some ways didn't develop them. Well because it was like this other opinions, so loud yeah, but
always felt like me, kind of living out, dream kind of unaware itself. I definitely do I feel that in a way she worked so hard for me to like pick up the baton, do. I do truly feel like that in even getting getting us. You know out of a small town coming here and all the things that she did in pursuit of her dream was reason why I was able to have mine yeah out you, and I hope I don't bastardize it because I'm not going to be recited his view. Finally, as you did, but the book starts with you being seven in your mom picked you up. In a cab which was really rare. You guys in travel by car, but she had not addition and she figure from school, and it was a crazy, crazy, cold out, and you guys It's a traffic light somewhere on Broadway. Maybe it in you see few women outside better in many skirts fish net stocking.
His high heels they not dressed for that environment, and you ask your mom why those Ladys I like that in your mom in this very house. Before way without getting into the details of them being sex workers, or anything, basically says people do what they have to do this and you to yourself and that moment at seven I never will let myself in a situation where I am exposed in honourable, like that, that's a committee, you may get seven years old right. I remember is so clearly, despite that right, is vague. I can so relate to you like to have a notion who I'm gonna be and then defined but I was in that at times is so soul, crushing so the first time you, explain is You were doing some modeling work in you did like
a circular like I like the catalogue, and it was you and underwear, newer, young and then the time you're like ok, this is whatever not even thinking about what it meant and then the thing came out and you realize Jesus there. I am, I'm exposed vulnerable and everyone? My age can see this it's in the world and its now completely out of my control like all that's weird. I guess I did that and then the one that even gets more and heartbreaking is that your first magazine opportunity, tied to the release of your first album you go there, the photographer. Basically, you now of early gets all your team out there, so that no one is there to protect you in starts pushing pushing yeah, maybe the pants on button, maybe the shirts. This maybe this and then you leave and then what you see on the cover is you
covering your breast with your arm pants, unbuttoned, any said it may be puke, when you saw in just the devastation of wow, that's the opposite of what I wanted. It's the FAO. Good thing. I said it would never happened to me that so powerful I'm glad you can admit that someone that Smart incur but it s conviction we can still and there he'll tell anybody ass yeah and you true, oh my gosh is so true and thank you for you know why happiness, so beautifully was cool to hear you put it together like that. As this is you don't know how you get where you are, I think, and suddenly you're there and in you thought, you'd, but never be there and there you are, and I think that in a way I realise at that had to happen and it had to have an early the universe, whoever had to show me like this is what
happens. This is what happens. You know that this is our those- and, if you don't cry bounded boundaries for yourself when you don't create some type of check in with your whatever you want for you, God only knows where it can go, so it's part of the growth is part of the process that helps us to figure out who do we? actually want to be in it why will you actually stand up for yourself because it wasn't like he was touching me. He didn't do anything visit leads me that would make me back. Don't you know get away from me, there wasn't it was like this mental thing. Now let us now like yeah. This is a little uncomfortable in others. The little come in its totality. If you Danny, said, here's the game plan by the end of this you're going to have your shirt off in your pants on. But you go no, I'm out, but it's been baby steps right. That's what's so painful is all the little spidey senses we like, and then it did walking down a path right,
as it is very interesting and to this day I you know really really work on trust. Think that good, like that whole got check this, where, even if his is the smallest thing, that's rays, his finger leg, I don't really like this something about this is weird, even if I could and I'm so good like we all are at talking that sense into it. No, it's not like that. Is when you feel like. That is because it presents a little bit aggressive and it'll be fine and they might just at a bad day- and I say talk myself into or out of that check. An answer. I really work very hard daily right now to say, like that The first thing that came to you listen there's a reason why that's? There came a few, so stop China make it okay. So that's a hard process
yeah and I think what we're one. I love that you you make a point to say: I'm not against nudity, I'm not against any this. What I'm against is being sold one thing and delivered another which we can all relate to, but I do wonder what made you vulnerable to that situation if any. It was you nineteen man you're trying to It gets you make it a little bit like you're you're got it. I'm gonna embody a pop star, so you can oh yeah, I'm down. Oh yeah, I got there I'll. Let you know part that fraudulent I think we all carry a little bit like. I know that when I've been in that situation of regret, some of the things mostly was because I was trying to act like I knew what was up like oh yeah, I get there and I think that then that I with a lot of and again this is another daily practice that constantly working on. Is this thought that everybody knows better than me, because I such a surety. I was such a baby and I was at wore. He knows, I'm issue, you shot some animals, incredible people
the planet my, why wouldn't he know what looks good and you standing there. You feel awkward as hell just period like anytime, someone's those Cameron, your family, you feel court you see, there's no natural version of that at all, and so you're tryin like find oppose final position like this. My mouth right is man like hips right leg is my show that what do I owe and so that in the persons kind of like a little, is a little that try this. Take that down put that unlike other, but they must know red, and so this idea of every money, no one more than you, I think, is something we also our struggle with, as opposed to be in my eye. I do know what's good for me, you don't know what's good. For me, I know is good for me and that went on for a long time for me thinking that ever since everyone had more experience- and I was one thousand percent fagin- it's what I mean tended. I knew what I was doing, and so I believe that you know and death Please help everyone else does too, and that was it set back from that cause. I've figured other people knew more than I would
This should not at all ever be mistaken, for the notion of poor ass. You got it. The thing you love. I got you thing I love, I dont think anyone's planing about that. I a priest, the honesty with. The reality of it is so the other part that was The point: is you being on tour on tour or Eber you're in a new city every single day you this notion that might see something or experience? It is a fairy tale but you don't you you leave one airplane to get in one bus to get on one backstage and they all of the same, and it just ended in the meantime, when you're not doing that you're doing sometimes two three photo shoots a day and the request there never ending- and you have this probably the saying that my wife that she has an eye on some level have which is I dont, want this right? I'd stop. I can't let it stop,
I dared turned down this. One photos shoot that might lead to me becoming apathetic in checked out and I can't keep this thing going, but you know you did described this moment of Bein backstage this little Cinder Black box in their day to day manager, who I believe has been your friends into or for something come in and your crying a near dislike. I just needed to stop, and yet the fear it stopping in going away rang Ray what what a catch twenty two to be, and if the, if you're buying into that logic, which you don't know any other way of making a magic is no one else that you ever met has had this experience. So it's not like you can go to some member hay in demand a new kind of a first kittens third, did you feel? I know you don't know anybody that's been too. Is and towards ship, although you PETE, you might be meeting people- and surely you like in awe that here
the same room with certain people, but you guys don't have a relationship at this point, and so there is definitely a hoodie. To ask about. How does this go or is this normal or is this not normal? Was it too much, or is it just right, or is this just how it is and there's no one to add so in so many ways you kind of are winning, it and most at a time as we I'll do it. We subscribe to that messaging that you know away. You know, there's a hundred other people ready to replace you. You know: hey hundreds of people we stay where you are now in, and you know that you're that shit I now because the ninety nine percent not just happened and maybe come we did this for two seconds, and so you know that- and you know that This is a dream many people would want to achieve so so it is Definitely so just seeing what you bring up. I think that that point of what point to use that create boundaries for yourself. What I think is very important in any any life any life. Anyone. This is not singular too
entertainment, industry or anything like that. There's a part of us especially like American US. Very, very if we're not burning the candle at both ends of we're not dying from exhaustion. If we're you know. Come please leave out working. You know under sleeping everyone else. We know at we're, not gonna, be successful and we're not gonna, make it and we're not doing enough and at what point. Do we start to one think about ourselves in regard to our health and our mental health and caring for you, Temple, which is your body and just you mining is only a spear and we're just not taught those things. We are not encouraged to do it. And is not a habit. There were encouraged to make. So I think that that moment that you're describing in the book was really still didn't know how to do it and I still totally thought shoot. If I take a break I just couldn't, it was a breakdown. I couldn't.
Take it anymore. I couldn't do one more moment of anything. I had to go had to flee. But there were still that moment, whereas, like I, We won't even come back to any of this. It was just that I couldn't tolerated anymore, so I did a matter at that point but as I did plants and his idea of having some space, I think, is a big deal for all doesn't matter your lawyer of Euro medical practitioner, whoever that you are, we all this thing where we think we have to overwork to be successful while in then exact about his nearest resolution from two years ago, and mine was to stop answering. How are you with great busy because It is like everyone's go too because, like you said it feels like you're, not worthier productive. If you're not burning the candle at both ends up you're, not busy, All the time you drive a million things going on for not overworked, you feel like you're, not good now for not doing enough- and I was like that's a problem-
that we're all going around saying, I'm so busy, I'm so busy, I'm so busy. So true- and we don't take care of ourselves, think anyone who's got a boss knows what its I did get a email during dinner time and feel like you have to be available to these. People live after you ve love work. I every friend I have deals with that. There's action Studies and dad about employers, respect boys with boundaries more than they respect. So at first think you're, unlike a ball and you're, not cooperative, but it does turn out the. It elevates view people's mine that you care enough about yourself to have boundaries that each it demonstrates that you have value for yourself and then now I see you as having value rang re enjoying this like. So this is too great. Say this whole package, whereas it is good, I didn't realize it was this good. The reason is, that is because everything else is such a damn rush.
You know you going on Jimmy Kimmel, the James Corden and like it that you got five minutes or less to tell like the funniest or you can possibly tell and try to relate to whoever you can and then get the hell out and do the quick song and by and you ever have like a moment's good. Ever and express- and so this is really Oh, I see why I like you and I'm really have to be a new convert lover, Thank you, sir, and you too, and thank you for it, and I think the other thing is people don't even see Michael care to ass. You anything that's layers, d, It feels like you are interested, so that's really cool. Thank you stay tuned for more armchair expert. If you dare, we are supported by stamps dot com for all our sakes. We need to avoid crowds anyway. We can right now, but what if you need to go to the post office, if you need postage to send
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these days. The other really are right now. Armchairs gives special offer that includes a for weak trial, plus three postage and a digital scale. Without any long term, commitment just go to stamps that calm click on the microphone at the top of the homepage and type in Dax, that stamps dot com and enter Dax stay save my friends. I wonder what the emotional component was for. You did. You have a moment were where who grew up in house kitchen in Manhattan, most densely populated sitting in Amerika. I I've been rural is going to say white trash Agnes, but but when a similar is that all the dude hang in the neighborhood who had no jobs ago. Do everyone at a hustle every Lomas trying to get something, and I we were fully aware that everyone wanted something of my and I wonder was there a moment. Were you recognised? Oh all, these
people that are quote managing me or guiding me or my label president are all this. Oh, they is the same hustlers that I knew to have my guard up for as a kid, but I let I let the wolves and henhouse did you have any emotion among your, like? Oh fuck they're, just hustling, do and there trying to get everything for me too, and what is that feel? does it feel like betrayal? This village heartbreak is? Is it I d expect it? I think that I have been blessed to have some people really did genuinely want to protect me. I think I really do. I think that they did want the best for me. They did want to save me from what they knew as such a dirty. Greasy cry me take take, take tab, business and then kind of speech you, our legal. I got what I want from you and you you finish now to me. You know so is this:
I should add energy in this space that they did want to protect me. I think that, of course, by nature its difficult because you are putting together a friendship and business and I actually do believe that friendships and business can accept when can work, I'm out of them. Like my like separate friends and busy, I don't think it always has to be like that. A truly no! You can be friends and do good business. Why live with my car? How so see so that they need to know, but I think that it also by nature. It does make you, I have to, be more aware, I think, because I live later. I started to realize that allowed the things that I even thought my dreams were other people's s dreams that I was executed. Damn near and apportion
that is a beautiful exchange. You know, I hope you Rachel as you help me, reach my dreams together, we're all growing that this balance state. That's is surely something really good comes from that in an unbalanced state. It starts to be, I think, deceiving as too Does a person really want this for you or do they want? as for whatever it my dear and I think that's where it becomes so necessary for you have your kind of guy in check and for you to have clarity of What you need and what brings you happiness because you can find Hisself self taken away all these things that are, you know, motivating people for reasons that might not always being your best interests and you might not even totally realized it so I did find that I had to start to become more aware of that's where I would prefer
be be a little bit more trusting that I'd ever this is mine. He's been with me for, and we got such a look at. You know we're doing so and also still be awake to the fact that okay, but what do you need and making sure It's ok that you're go with that and then, if it adds up than great I can get what they need and is all cool, but you can get lost in it. I think sometimes well isn't the overriding fear really for all of us that if I have these boundaries, if I create this hurdle for somebody, that might be the thing that I find out. Oh they didn't love me that much that we think we have to be total. The available for somebody doing it on their terms in order to do of their love one. We're just nervous to find out that if we have this hurdle or this boundary, that some of my bow is not like that bottom of it all. Resonated with me and said so much of our lives in because of our different experiences.
The different bruises and in we're trying to nurse all the time with the abandonment is at the root of so much of what. Fuels us or what gives us that level of fear that you, that underlying tone that we don't even realise- and I think they yes, I think because abandonment has definitely been something that, pretty sure. Ninety nine point, nine, if not a hundred of us, have all experienced in some way. There is the fear of life. Will you stay if idle? be with you, I would you actually be. Ok, if I don't think that same thing and like I said with with my mother, it's always been such a. A hard opinion where was kind of like. If I didn't agree, it would be so much to even deal with that, and I would say you know what I'm an agree so that we just move on think a lot of that trained me to do things sometimes that maybe I dead and all stand up for my own truth and that becomes
the key is you get into that plays, whereas I will maybe you're the only stability I have in this thing and ends, of course we're looking for security ok. So the last thing I want to say to you is As I said, I'm in a the thing I love about a is that all the Lessons have picked up her from someone tell me how they failed, not how they not have, were victorious. It was them goin I've I fucked up in this way, and I got all I see you. I do that same thing. And now my ears are open. So I think what you ve done with this: but more myself. I think, so bright, with a view to be vulnerable on, go I'm a list keys. Am I thirties, I'm a millionaire and I've got more Grammy's than fuckin teeth in my mouth and eyes. Say who I am- and I have a fear of being true to who I am so for
all the other women or me young man or whatever, who find that the challenge you admitting that that's a chance, for you is very poor, therefore, and I think it is very cool of you- it's a very good way to be of service. So I am really happy for you that this is the book. You wrote, I really appreciate it. Were thy. My favorite part was you sayings and curl of in a ban. Retirement age is that the union has a very effective and then you get stuck in revived for like a cop about. We got that that is so so amazing, and I really do hope that the experience of the past for that that I read in this, and I am so Great, for that. I have been able to come to a place and It seems you too, and we have been able to come to a place that I can embrace the parts of me that are wounded and not to the whole or have followed. Of doubt and end by my journey of embracing those things I feel so much more open.
There's so much more human I feel so much more of a connection. People that, in the light of my life, I dont think out I myself to have because there he's masks and all this armor and all these men, Muslims that I thought were kind of keep. Him is John and allow me to plough through the stone wall. You know- and I am just so grateful to please now where it's like. Actually, all those other parts are, the parts that are rich in full of complexity and interesting and make you so new wants them fallen, complex and gorgeous and like that is what, excess understand each other, so it's so much more freeing to just honor you and I- and I love that were I'll try to figure that out well again, I can't relate to winning Grammy's are opening my mouth and difficult terrain. Sacks comes out,
all the vulnerable. These here, as I do. I know this person has beg. Pardon me, that's this person, so I just thank you oh man. I hope we get to talk to you again. I'd love to do imposing like this what that has at how that hat pops are set in real life outside aware another hat. When I meet you in the areas I have this same, had though this is my favorite had then one I believe so well, we love you and thank you for taking the time, and now we really loved you again thing in your face again at sea, as your base game is tight, it's good face to hang. You write about you to about three minutes but you're right, because a array suttee later
now. My favorite part of the show the fact check, with my soul maiden Monica bad men. This entire fact check is sponsored by quickly. It is. We are excited, I already consumed one of the shells from quickie flipped flat with Caitlin Wilson, we'll forty two, my fate, comedians. Allow all love those guys about than on this. Now they have in both of them together, unbelievable. Yeah, I mean what are far greater than some of their part in each of their individual parts are humongous, I think anyone's when the funniest human beings working in television or found well tail and Forte is obviously genius a genius. It's so good. I just love, and so for people dont know what Caribbean is is a brand new streaming platform that delivers me
We call the episodes in ten minutes or less so. It's really kind of design for people to watch on their phone, which initially as like, really making content for phone specifically, but tough, is so high and yes, like all the those they have on their legal reasons, the most dangerous game LEO It is worth. It looks like a huge blockbuster movie, but it ten minutes segments which I'd love because it so bingo, it's really exciting, because you get new episode every day. You have something to look forward to which we love, because we always get nervous that our things are running out yet, and we hate that. Yes, that's true, so it's great is they look like huge blockbuster movies? Even flip, which is a comedy half is shot beautifully. Yes, so every one of em looks phenomenal. They all have huge actors like tons of fund, show them what I like to about it. Is there not Aunt Jane with like two things share. This is a ton of content. It is with huge
or of every kind of George Orwell. Yes, we don't feel scared that we're not gonna have enough and your wife, my mother, was in a show. She was in thanks a million which is Jennifer Lopez's show in its amazing Christian was when we first got like the offer for it was like. I cannot believe I did not think of this idea. It all yeah, oh yeah, it'll she got a hundred thousand dollars. Is that what it was yet too? to somebody. Would she gave it to, this educator, we know who totally deserves and then that person has to give half of their money. It someone else, they think deserves it, really really cool anyway. Guys I have given. You can go right now and download and get a nice me day free trial and as a ton of fresh original shows, new episodes come out every day. I love it, hence fatty. I want you to leave us singing her music before she got on, not none
ok. Well, funding, we did well, While we are waiting for her to join the zoom car just put on her some of her greatest head on the eye packs and we sang along waiting for her she's so prolific. She is even forgot. Some of the songs and you'll be dead, honest with you I wanted to get diary of right, that's the song I like this, she says be able and in the process zoom in past all these other songs rumbling. Oh yeah, that's a giant! That's a giant Oh that's a great song is enjoying a vehement. I lover love with her. I already loved her and I'm in love with her. It really did. I was already such a huge fan and then she was so special, for normal, very new
more glaring around. That's what I want to say. Mostly she's normal M good job Ilusha set out to be spectacular in your nor official FIFA now she's, both she's boat, spectacular and normal. I just think yet such an uphill battle, when you're, starting at such a young age in this industry and in the entertainment industry and fame and all that stuff. So much about four young, the nineteen, the out, have been dead, look wash yeah yeah too much money too much Brahms more money. You know I know we're using the tattoo on my back more problems than small. My back, I wouldn't even be surprised his. I would like that Are you going tat? If I didn't act? I have a lot more than just a two big of a pain in the ass again uncovered
they have our to play to Joe exotic share. I'm gonna be there in an hour and a half earlier. Getting this whole thing covered on my shoulder to think he had any tat of tigers. I have to assume Sylvie dinner there. Be ridiculous. I have you got me Orient ass, his rights policy to not have any tab. Isn T azure couple updates. One is, I guess Joe some out behind bars his made a statement that he wants either Brad Pitt or David's. Aid to play him an ally. And yet you know that's what are wide range. I love it will ever incidents Brad Pitt to play them. That's just yeah yeah. That goes, I guess, yeah everyone wants. I would want Brad Pitt to play me even though it's my story would make a ton of sense. If you was playing me like, I want Charlie's. Me and do not have any one could do if anyone could pull off brown face.
Now hold on an offensive way and I think should be heard ass. She turned a monster. Remember monsters, she's, very transformative there very save best friend. Weeklies here he's leaving tomorrow. How do you feel sad yeah I've been having so much fun laughing it absolutely nothing. None of our jokes translate to anyone else because you guys are constantly around and we're just laughing so hard about the same. Four things and they're, just not funding anyone else which I accept before. Very funny to us. Every single thing becomes about bass and mackerel and steal, headed sturgeon that allow that's true and those things like the fish. I agree that generally feels pretty in the latter, when you guys doesn't feel inviting not realize it our eggs, I dont know if anyone thinks any that's funny, I can only speak for my son. He has been out three four years. I think it
by me for six. Second, by then generally, you guys like to turn it into six minutes. At least minimally. My brother hated we discovered each other, we would sit in the Bay I remember one time in particular- he came downstairs and we were laughing at a a slice. Pop can bear her just looking at the circle. And thinking what it was saying and all this stuff and we were really really laughing hysterically me financiers he's like what are you doing falcon? laughing at a pop. Can you guys are full of shit? You're? Not really. Let screamed at as really laughing. You somehow was all a charade. I think he pilot that left out. Then I'm forty five ending it sweet. I think he did feel left and I used to have those jokes and aunt Allison, there's a new guy around man, but he never it using analyses. Five years
for them here, so he only wanted eventide Joseph me, like one day a we lie wanted them seven days a car is now, I do think, is really cute and fun and funny to be around you guys because some are. We were you guys around each other bit, but it fell different. Maybe the amount of time wasn't has concentrated or something I don't know, but if our different, so it feels like I'm really peeking relationship in its very q is, that mostly annoying no it's cute, it feels very excluding. It feels a little exe. Gloody yeah, which you know it's not my aunt and I want everyone on board. I wish everyone thought the pills, so there are goop pills called or why am I so being tired and they are good. They were they work and then in Kristen gave some to weekly and then he was taking him. He loved him and then he happen to read on the bottom. That was chock full of sardines, mad mad for all and all these fears year. You have only just started, how many bass are in
each appear in there's a twelvemonth bass and every pale, and then that I recognise that's not fun for anyone else, but for us it's very fine I'll. I was there for the beginning of that conference. When it started, and it was fine but Van. We just read it to into well. You just took it to a new level, but then it felt once it hit that, like others, no play for me in this conversation in worsen, then I'm just sitting there watching you gonna do a thing for ten minutes and then I get up and leave the up yeah I recognize I don't really know what to do. What we do you hear me. I don't have really funny for me our new as one right is a gang banger who cares allowed at that is framed, pursues its artistic dreams of human saying that one, that's the one that took over yes, the last couple days.
Was like a gang banger and he really appreciated Hector's contributions to the life into gangbanging, but he noticed he's really good at comedy and he should do an open mic night at the laugh factory and, what's funny, is that this gang banger knows all the names of the different places. So he knows about Broadway and then the more he knows about it, the funnier that yeah laid on funnier. When I explained this is a broader question. Do you think when Europeans him? Do you think you feel more child, like all big time, yeah yeah yeah, I feel twelve years old when I'm on which I like yeah, he's also being textbook weekly. He is who years since he is alive which is now he has two puppies. He has no business having these, they such in key textbook weekly. He ended up with two poppies area, outdated,
of and realising oh shit. This is a tunnel work. There is sound, here they are, but that's the sweetest part about him is he saw anything that sounds like a good idea or opposite interesting. I would it went straight to the six. A m whining and more shouting everywhere, I'm like arrested or confined by too much frontal lobe thinking me too the out, and he just like yeah. They look cute that moment. Let's get a more or about the rest later he's a very nice boy. He is he's the swedish essences just sweetness. Ok, ok, Alisha Keys! Ok, so you said that I've been living at the house for mind before quarantine mud. It had not been a man they had now how about two weeks the propeller Otto to view I've never had less of a girl on time than now. I know I think everyone feels that no one
as what day. No, no! No it's going. I now thank God. They extended those that tax deadline, all right, no money. Now the people would not. They would a message, not unintentional where's, our calendar, whereby the curtain- oh it's last week I moved to April. We do I want to see who it is too much or male body, okay, so which Whitney Houston Doc as the official one the Mirror MAX. One is the official one, that's the one that the family was participated. Painting and you know that was, erected by cabin Mcdonald who did Laskin Scotland, which one mere max a real area or love. I know you like movies, are very prolific commercial director in England, O riots doing or asking Scotland. These are no bottom. What we just watched bad boys yeah, the third waage- is not directed by car. Make Donald no. Nor is it directed by Michael Bay, Wowzer shock to me.
Why was it was very Michael Bay? I was eager eyes as released. Your surprise, you loved it, and then we watched the first one. We went back to the first one. We have finished it. But I'm really excited dissolve leading to the second one, that's long where they had a humongous budget. That's your third noxious budget, just visually stunt why's that movies hard to be whilst man he is so charming. Who Martin Lawrence itself, army so funny from people just say: words yeah the another, certain people that live You don't even need a really right, a joke, you saw them say a sentence and it'll be hysterical. Yeah So many a martens lines I think were intended to be just exposition, Then there are funny air. The blast, Hashtag blast asked Craig was payment. Energies hashtags has tag last element, oh Jesus
anyway. So yes, a mere max and then the show time one actually they got sued by Bobby Brown Hall and the estate of Bobby Christina Brown, because they used footage of the reality series being Bobby Brown and there were saying that they didn't get permission to do that occur memories, have weird laws. You don't have to get the rights for music if, like your fail, mean someone in real life on the street and like the bodega behind it is plain, Michael Jackson, your fine really, yes, it there's all these we're loophole. So I wonder like are when it comes to showing trademarked footage and stuff here they have some kind of leeway outer now. Ok, you said: why did they caught the sophomore curse? Software slump o sophomore slots, my son, ok, she talked about mother and daughter relationships being the hard
and I was looking up that is in there like a lot of articles in a lot of delving into that question, which I thought was interesting and because it is real. Oh yeah, it's so real, but I think it's the same for fathers and sons think like both same sex parent child relationships or are wrought with potential yeah, because we're geysers like this we alpha tension, but who's going to be the leader of this family. When is the son old enough to not be told what to do? It sounds different when his dad's tell him not to do some. It sounds like a challenge to his manhood There is all this weird autonomy stuff that you need to get from dad more than most anxious day. One thing the people were saying. What I thought was interesting was that women's rights our changing so rapidly that from like generation to generation there really different,
Ah, so girls aren't just gonna follow in line with what their mother did or what their grandmother did, because things are changing somewhere in my room. Yeah the lifestyle. The mom examined my field, judged by adding that my mom and Herman yeah some articles. I sour crediting that as being an issue which I think really makes a lot of sense. Yeah. It's weird- and I ll not be older- relate to this, but I do think in some ways, like some doubts have built some steady, great business, that they work there ass off all right. Let's say they ve got like a family roofing company and they ve got some employers and some trucks and the tools. And then you got the sun and you want to hand over this thing. You worked so hard to your son and then you find it you're someone to play guitar embargoes yeah. It seems so high risk and you're scared for the son. You did all this really for the sign, yes to hand over something turn key
I want it feels like a don't appreciate this thing I built for you and then be you're, scaring me by this other choice boys yeah. That's all campaign located. I could imagine no less than I know nothing about a leashes mother. I dont know if they have any issues whatsoever, but let's just say I can imagine if you're leashes mother, who was raised in Toledo, Ohio her dad did not want her to go, pursue acting. She moved out New York. She did it at around here and now she has his daughter and now she gives her daughter, the childhood she wanted, which is the yes, let's put a piano in the middle of this one. Better apartment must dedicate your life to this, and I'm will support this like crazy and then your daughter, gits, this thing that you may be wanted here and you're going
If I had had this, I would be her soiling, that's complicated for and then you I bet, want to have some ownership over that. So you feel part of it like. This is a result of all this nurturing. I did and then, as the how'd you like none. I wrote these songs. I pressed the least. I have no idea what the relationship is. What that certainly a dynamic, that's right for some challenges, our pressure aimed at times I got grumpy assent. My dad is when like he would casually kind of Mention in a way that I at least I interpret this insane, I got my sense of humour from him or like tat in some kind of credit yeah. That was always really triggering to me or he'd, say like I'm, the one who quit a steady job and started businesses over and over again, I'm risk take her and you got that from me and as an adult Europe, you didn't The idea is amendments NOS eight, ten, none are you after three and you don't get to claim and
the scale and round here, but a bigger me should have included in this experience. I am sure that does have a lot to do with the fact that he left, because I don't have any of that, like I hope, with your dad or my mom, as far as like taking credit, aha, also, they don't laying radio ever say like. Oh you got that like. I think they are more alike where do guess: Ambrogio where'd you get that, but every now and then, and normally, if the other person, my mobility. Oh you got that from here. For some reason. I like it. Yet more- and I think may be part of it, which is deeper- is in a weird way there giving their spouse a compliment. Oh you get. Your discipline from Hem
I hear that is: oh, you think he has allowed a disciplinary area, so I like, when they give each other compliment, is nice. They had to do it via this other channel. What about the inescapable truth is yeah. You got. Everything from both them and I got everything for that is the cold hard excellent reproduction? Yes, I got all of my genes from those to be genes, yet the cultural layer, I do think, is large, yeah we'll if you have a chip on your shoulder like I have had a lot of times in my life. You hear everything as taking credit away from you. Yeah- I mean I have that, but I don't have it with them. I don't know why, but I do have it with everybody else. I need a lot of crime. Or even the eye triggered yesterday on accident. By saying you don't need me anymore, you you were talking about this,
how good shows eyes yeah, which I'm so proud of and happy for air message. You don't need me anymore, but that didn't field to me that wasn't you taking away credit you're, giving me credit yeah, but somehow I didn't hear didn't like her either in land. How I wanted it to why guessing I then it is you needed me at one point: It is now what I was ever suggesting oh and I don't think. That's what bothers me. I think what scared me is. The idea of things are separate. Ah ha, or that I'm saying in some capacity that now I can go my own way and you can go your own, maybe like this is yours and that's my Ciao, aha, and I don't feel that at all, I feel that this is our show, that's our show. Ah, I especially feel that this is our share of
I guess you sure, geared about the idea that, like it's all separate or something right, but I didn't and then your liner Ojo Seigneur media Moldova as protein people. If people are keeping up, I had a very big challenge assigned to me last week and I have completed it. You do tat. I got when yesterday You're talking to me why Oh, oh, I love the way for the everyone I hopped away for Wednesday, what around brownie accomplishing that chance. They know you weren't looking forward to it yeah. The challenge was, I had to have found sacks yeah, and I was very scared here- was a cause
an experience that a memorable it was. It was memorable. Yeah it'll be inextricably linked to Corona, too. Electricity is a period of your life, you ll remember any I got it should. Actually. I was thinking that recently we have a guess coming up a week from today who talks about busily having like this, like this oral memory of a period of time in his life. That was I kind of hard. He talks about like in a comedy club and economic. Remember, the smell, like walk, always tears. He has this like really deep memory of it, and I was thinking about it after and I think the memories where your most vulnerable are more etched in, oh sure, yeah yeah, like those either scare RP, your body, can repeat more cozier like more open. I think two worlds and then
gets etched? I agree so we're vulnerable right now. The corona, some things that are happening now yeah are gonna feel pretty visceral. I think I do too. Some people commented on our debate and they they liked both of us today about whether I should talk.
But being happy during yeah, and so one aspect unite neglected, to think of which I thought was a really cool one. First and foremost, people were alike. They saw your intention and loved it. Ah and then one person road, like what pisses me off, is the celebrities complaining about quarantine when they are in a big fancy house and they have a ton of food yeah and all the shit and they're, not panic. That's what's annoying as someone acting like they got it tough when I know they dont habit to understand, and we I hadn't even thought of that aspect. Yeah we are talking about it and I was like oh yeah. People are smart enough to go like who you kidding tell for sure yeah, but I think in different ways right like that, feels like a lie more fraudulent or a lot of. I think some, these celebrities are sincere. I think they're dead.
Might be going through me. I do not agree to say they murder outdoor people, muni people and that there are unhappy yeah, but that's what's a little tone, deaf for sure. I personally think all of that is absolutely true, someone's walkin around complaining when they have a far far far better than most people. That's problem I got would never ask you to complain, and aid at the same time would say, may be don't strike how fantastic everything is going here, and you, like more of a middle ground De Vigo again for the money factor, would which of course, is huge, but the real vintage I have over most people, I'm with atomic people yeah. I can continue with you Chris.
Then get weekly honour to kids, which is its own misery. At times, but by and large I'm not long life and death. Now, there's no loneliness happening now in our work and our house NATO if anything, it is like. Everyone wants a little space yacht. Occasionally here believes that that's probably one element, that's making, enjoy it more. Really, not money related, resigned, yeah! That's very true! Ok, so you so their studies and data that employers respect employees with boundaries and there's a pod cason. I didn't know what podcast you meant. I kind of assume
be referring to Adam Grant. Oh, I know exactly what it was answered: labour talking about it. It's from that book that everyone really loved about setting boundaries, essential ism centralism, guys words from I see. Ok, sorry, Adam Grand, not you this time, although I do feel again and ground would say something I bet he. He said I'd also looking into him to see if he said this, and he does describe two types of people. He says people who like to blend work and life are called. Integrators and, in contrast, sagged mentors like to keep their work and personal life separate. Ah ha or you, and I are the ultimate integrated II your average than we ever have is like transitioning from the two fresh air, but he said in general sag mentors. So not us
for a port, better well being than integrators bag. I know why, because you're never turned off like your own ever present for either probable would. But I think in this case it's more like your emails open. Twenty, for saving you are always available to that world. I think he would probably consider himself and into greater Yazzi seems with his rapidity in response time. Exactly. Ok, you said house kitchen is the most densely populated city in Amerika. I just meant Manhattan, but yes can do ok, Gutenberg, New Jersey, or is the most densely populated incorporated place in the United States, owe all health kitchen is also known as Clinton after George or bill. I'm gonna get us nowhere,
Oh no, there was a fact I didn't look up hold on, but I can do it right now. You said these and you could be right about this. Thirteen fourteen fifteen fifteen, okay, it's just fifteen grammys- and you said she has more gram then teeth and are now oh, I guess we would have to know how many tears in her mouth, but presumably more than fifteen. Seventy. These rules have twenty six years now. Is China count mighty? What can be twenty? Six there be thirteen until thirteen about the means you'd have an extra tooth on one side, her there's gotta be like twenty four twenty, eight or here's my arc. Eighty and it's gonna coincided multiply it by two one. Three, four five, six Seven, so twenty eight and then do you. You have wisdom to either Dm Yang Minor yanked wondering to sort it would thirty. I know I've for thirty, two yeah, I'm gonna Google is
thirty two teeth, it says the retail and that is including wisdom. Ass. We get older these teeth, shed and adult who, by the way of all the things that I think, are the weirdest that we do that were born with a sedative they fall out another ones. Come you hate that what I feel like that content of all, when I think about the evolution of having two different sets of teeth, I think about ok. Well, the first animals had one set teeth right, yeah, or what they were they middle sized. It's like we're www dynamic, worthy tiny, huge recombining humans are so the The man was born with these small baby teeth right, and so we d whether they were originally born with adult teeth and develop baby tea now or they were born baby t first and then developed adult teeth. I assume we evolved into baby teeth because I was all they could fit, and then evolution airily speak of those baby tee. The didn't leave one big yeah, so right so at some point in our history did adulthood
these tiny little tea, that world spread out and then someone had em a mutation where all those fell out and then this other big city teeth grew like when you just try to work out the evolutionary steps it seems impossible. I can see an ant having a three chamber heart right and then there's the mutation in one's bore, the four chamber heart and the nets that pumps blood better and then that they pass on their genes and disproportion around now. Everyone's got four chamber park. Now. How did someone have just baby tee? and then they had a mutation. There was a full others said of teeth growing behind the first say: ok, do you think? Maybe originally it was just one sat by the adult teeth based. They were connected to the baby, deepen up top they weren't to supper.
They were connected to just like a huge tooth, most of it behind the gum, cuz it behind the dump, and then it was just growing and growing and growing and then eventually evolutionarily speaking. It was too much teeth in the mouth, so then they would break off in the house. They break up into haves, and so eventually we grew to just have them already separate under the God, because those are in your damn they are, but here it is another thing I throw you. It seems to me it would be easier for the dna to evolve to just have the teeth b.
Malleable, so their baby, when your small in your heads, two tiny to fit these big teeth and then the teeth themselves are able to just grow and expand, and then some more come in as there's more room in your mouth. That makes some way more sense and seems less complicated. Then I just can't go, reject all those teeth and then grow big ass ones up top and then send those down back out think that material can grow cured him? Carry out to how this year we may grow at some point. They start as cells and they become tee, so they do grow originally to become tee, but they soon die. Just like our bones, stop growing same thing: war, bones d, never stop growing goody mean little. They don't start drawing their constantly replacing themselves genome saying, but they're not growing. Like my bones, grew till I was fifteen not growing longer now, but
They are replacing themselves right, but they're not expanding like they were. They do it for years and years and then they start and they sat so same what the teeth, but the two should be able to grow and expand like your bones, but it's a weird solution that they're just a full set, a big ass adults t sit and above the tiny teeth. I don't think so we. I think it makes the most sends out of all these. That would be like saying: ok, you're, bored, baby bonds and then at some point those baby won't have to protrude from your skin and red jacket so that these big adult, can grow and that's the system that exact authority, but the bones, your art, that way, because bones dont have any purpose. If their outside your skin teeth. Do you have? No? Take em I'll, kick him out. Your t fall out. Some say what
the bonds network that, when you had to have your humorous, fall out so that your adult humorous could descend down into your arm and be full size? It makes way more centres of the bone gets bigger and so the teach you just get bigger. Ok, there's one dead that still dressed in this commerce, but he's over us away with a little, we know that any hurry he target arm through her walkman out the window? Ok, that was all tat, was all Well, I love you. I love you.
Transcript generated on 2020-04-15.