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Episode 126: Dre Baldwin, Expert on Discipline, Building Confidence, and Mental Toughness

2018-07-02 | 🔗

Topics: 

  • What’s the biggest obstacle to discipline?
  • Succeeding against perceived odds
  • The mental state of “I’m gonna make this happen”
  • Dre’s skill stack approach: More skills…more options
  • Wanting vs. deciding to take action
  • Effective self-promotion
  • Transitioning from doing nothing to doing something
  • Dre Baldwin contact Info:

 

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See all of my Periscope videos here.

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The post Episode 126: Dre Baldwin, Expert on Discipline, Building Confidence, and Mental Toughness appeared first on Dilbert Blog.

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Bum Bum Bum Bum bum Bum, hey. Everybody come on in It's a very special coffee with Scott Adams and before we before. I tell you what all the funds going to be about this morning. It's time for the simultaneous up you know the simultaneous step is the best step of the day. And if you don't get it early well, some this is going to get it. Are you ready simultaneous up everybody all right. Well, I am delighted today to be talking with Dre Baldwin. You can find him on twitter at at dre all day. Is that right? Dresden.
an expert on discipline, motivation and toughness? These are all the things that you want to know when these of this, my favorite topic Dray, is coming to us from Miami I'm connecting to him using the interface app, the so the app that my company makes is called interface by when hub and you can connect to experts spurts can make money or in this case, making He when tokens, which we hope will be out and exchange to turn into money real soon. So let me introduce Dre, Baldwin, Dre, say hi to everybody on periscope. Oh, stolen everybody going on everybody on Scotts periscope. Welcome glad this conversation, great and I'm hoping our sound is pretty good. I'm trying I'm using a new technology here using my Ipad behind me, and
casting from my phone, alright. So What is what is the biggest problem that people have with getting discipline? What what do you think is their biggest obstacle to being disciplined? The biggest obstacle to be in discipline is that it's just not fun for most people, they don't see it as something that is not that people don't know what discipline is. Everybody knows what and this is something that I don't remember where I said it, but somewhere either. Writing, or speaking I talked about it last week- is that if you have a job and you could show up everyday and you keep your job, you have discipline, because your show up every day to do your work or work. You have kids and you're raising them your discipline. If you go to school,
you play on a sports team or you've done anything, you have a garden that you maintained in gracies, but you have discipline. So it's not that people don't know what it is or that date is not even that they don't have it it's just. There are certain areas of life that it's painful. For some people to apply, actually I think we all have here is where it's painful for us to apply this lesson Yelp before we get into some of those details. You use your own concepts here to to to succeed in basketball. Is that right
Can you give us a little background on how you did that? Surely this shortest short version is I started playing basketball from Philadelphia. Pa is my hometown. I started playing basketball at the age of fourteen and the environment that I come from. There's no there's no grass at the playground field. So not many of us. Some people play football, but not many. There's a tennis court that nobody used there's a baseball field that the grass doesn't get cut. I did play a little bit of that. There's no swimming pool, we didn't know any other sports, so the only thing that any most young men do is go to the basketball court, at least in our early teens, so I started playing at age. Fourteen didn't have anyone teaching Maine, I have a sister, she doesn't play sports, I'm six feet, four inches tall and my father is five thousand seven hundred and fifty eight navy. So he didn't play basketball. There are a lot of kids in the neighborhood playing. There were only maybe three coaches in the neighborhood, so no one took me under their wing, so I had to teach
so and this is in the mid 90s- no Youtube, no programs online, no Instagram. So I just went to court and just started trying stuff just to see what will workout then, eventually it started. Some work finally made my high school basketball team as a senior where I averaged an unbelievable two point per game, is a senior in high school. That's eight hundred and eighty where normal people are going to need to say, ok, well, look, you can be successful in life, but it probably won't be in sports. May eighteen graduated high school two points again or five years later I was signing my first professional basketball contract that was in lithuanian and if you're looking at me, saying he's a basketball player, who is he probably never heard of because my whole career was played out across seas outside the United States by place for nine years internationally? And while I was doing that started making programs making Youtube videos, and that's where I kind of became known- I got more known through Youtube than I did from my actual planning for it. at the shore birds on basketball.
So what was it? What was it that a lot very interested? What was the point at which you thought I could do this professionally. That's a great question: around eight hundred and fifteen. Sixteen Scott, I started believing because I saw how quickly I was developing. I was actually getting better at basketball, despite the fact that there was a whole lot of irrationality in this form ideas, because I tried out for the high school team in ninth grade center, eleven three got cut the first day and those you know ha sports, tryouts work. There are several levels of the triumph. I never made it past the first level of tryouts cut every time, but I was improving I started to believe you know what I want to be a basketball player. I had always had this dream of being rich and famous. That was that was always the thing that I wanted. That's what I thought that was all the people who had the success. It seems to be that's what they had, so I figured my path would be through sports and around eight hundred and sixty.
Start thinking that maybe I could become a professional, but it was very vague- gives it a dream or goal, but I had no path no plan and then at the age of eighteen. So this was the summer after high school graduation so that somewhere between high school We started out that's the summer where I knew I was actually good at basketball and players asked me: will trade? What does it mean to be good? How do you notice her good and my definition of good is at that point I knew that you could put me on any basketball court anywhere in the world with anybody and I would earn respect a spider bite end of the day playing out there. That's when I knew I could actually become a pro. I did not know it wasn't until years later, maybe two or three years later, that I learned what the actual path, I am, but I had he the belief that I could do it by eight hundred and eighty now, like you said, was that irrational? Do you think, because you couldn't have possibly known you couldn't have known that it would work out, for you
but did you did you feel you had you had this something special I did, and it was absolutely one hundred percent irrational. For me to believe I could become a professional basketball player. There's a funny story. I'll tell you. When I graduated from college graduated from college, I went to an NCAA for those who follow sports. I want to see a division three school, so I will grab a degree from Penn State Penn State, just like every other state school has several campuses across the state right. So I want you to Penn State Altoona, Ncn sports, their deep three, whereas the main campus, the one with the football team I went to a d3 school. I did not put up. I popping stats I did quickly, but if that were not only blow anybody out of the water, I didn't even play my senior year. So I got kicked off the team by the coaches my junior year and when I got home from college my parents were asking me. Naturally: ok, you got a college degree now. So what are you going to do
I said I want to play professional basketball, but you can imagine this from the little bit. I've told you about myself to this point. How ridiculous that sounds great! You didn't make the high school team to a senior. You didn't even play your senior year at a D3 college, now you're going to become a professional athlete like what sense does that make it didn't make any sense, none at all and my mom just tore into me there, like, you went to school for years. I've sacrificed all my life for me and my sister for you and your sister to get good educations. And now you want to play basketball because you need to get a job. You need to get yourself a car and get an apartment. At the time I had braids in my hair
since I need to get a haircut, so these are all the things that my mom would like. She couldn't believe that I was thinking it was still irrational. Even to that point- and I was so angry from that conversation- I didn't lash out in my mind or anything, but I was so angry that someone could look at it in just smacked me in the face with that. Reality quote on quote that that emotional drive from that day push me to guarantee that it was going to happen. So, yes, it would
one thousand percent irrational believe that work. Now, that's the exact reason: why did they do you have some parental influence? Our were one of your parents, sort of the same mental state as you, which is I'm just going to make this happen. No, absolutely not. My parents were very much more practical, much more need, realistic size and with my mother and father, my mother was really the one who kind of a down of all Scott. She was the one who made the rules and enforce the rules and did most of the talking. My father was there, but he kind of let her she kind of steered the ship. So I don't even know what he really thought about it, because she was on such a role that he kinda just co signed it. But I would say the. the discipline that I had developed since then. Definitely one hundred percent comes from my mother, so there was the beginning a gang of all right. So I gotta ask you a mom question,
Did your mother tell you, you are going to be successful as something or did she assume you're going to be successful, or was that really not part of the conversation? It was part of the conversation. I think I mean my parents, I'm I'm thirty. So my parents were born in early 60s, and this is before, of course, we had an internet then so this was the whole. The plan like I like to call it the plan in capital. Letters like- for now? So this is go to school? Get him get educational college get degree getting good job and get yourself a car get stuff at the house and get married have two point: five kids in the dogs and live happily ever after just be a little bit better than your parents. So I think that's what my parents wanted my sister to do. They never explicitly said it, but when I told her, I want to be a pro athlete and I saw her reaction. I figured ok yeah, that's pretty much what she wanted, but she didn't want to have to tell us that my sister wouldn't did kind of exactly that
kind of the opposite. What what was your major business with a focus in management and marketing? all right. So what I like about this is that you were building a what I call a skill stack. So, even if the basketball didn't work out the way you wanted, you still had lots of ways to go. You know you could you could still get there on multiple past now let's, let's get to see what the viewers probably care about the most, which is yeah they're, really happy that they're really they're really happy that you're motivated but they're wondering how the hell could we be in black? That guy lay the other think and how? How can I feel that confident about, about what I'm doing? What techniques do you do you, which people in to get them in the right mindset or
Someone is looking for. Confidence is. The first thing I want to figure out is: what is it that they are looking for in? Why are you actually looking forward and then try to uncover what they really want? usually Scott, I'm sure you know people tell you that they want something. That's not that's, not really what they want, that's what they say they want, but there's something under that, maybe even something up another that that they truly want, but if we were just saying someone must be confident on the surface. The number one thing that person has to do is create: what is the outcome first thing you need in your mind the outcome is the same with me and playing basketball. I'm sixteen not making the basketball team, and I said I want to be a pro basketball player. So all I had was the starting point and I had the ending point. I had no idea what was going to happen in the middle, but because I had that vision that vision was kind of propelling me forward in order to get what I wanted, I guess is a version of a bola of attraction. So the number one thing is: what is it that you actually want it? You have to really be what you really want. And now it sounds good but
Internet, but what you actually really want in your life, something that you may even be embarrassed to tell people, because the reality of the facts in front of you says that doesn't even similar to master now I like to make a distinction between what people say they want and what they decide to do because they're different. So when you decide it's going to be on one thing and one thing it doesn't get you you as much as deciding to go. Get it now it did you did you visualize yourself in the future? Did you write down your what you wanted? How did you kind of get on that yeah. Well, I did I visualized it. Well, I visualized it. This is so this is like the mid 90s. I graduated high school in the year. Two thousand, so I don't know what visualization was I had. Never, I didn't get introduced to personal. What we call personal develop,
until maybe two thousand and two so I didn't know I didn't know there was such thing as visualizing and I didn't know about writing down goals. So, every year, every new year I will write down my golden next year. I want it actually it by hand on paper, only write by hand anymore, haven't in years, but I would do that. Visualize what it is that I wanted to cheat and and then around two thousand two, two thousand and three I got. I heard this radical idea like instead of writing down goals for each year, how 'bout write down goals for the next ten years or for your whole life. So I did that- and I remember writing down a goal that I wanted to one day: have a website, calledlikedrebaldwin dot com or drake dot, something that was going to be about me buying these for me and that eventually became Dre all day, which eventually became the brand. So I was, I was doing a rough version of visualization,
before. I even knew what this whole realm of making yourself personal development is. When I tell people is making yourself better in more valuable on purpose, a lot of people don't do it on purpose. I was kind of doing it somewhat. On purpose and somewhat by accident, but now that is available to everyone now I think it's a requirement so on top of visualizing, what you want, what tell a little more about technique because, some people can visualize, but then they're not doing anything about it. So That is what how do you connect a visualization to the actual actions, once someone has a clear vision, Scott of what it is they want to achieve. The next thing, of course, is you want to take some actions, but the challenge
I don't know what to do. I don't know where to go. I don't have any ideas and I get emails in the hands of people saying these exact things. Every single day it is, it is what you do at that point. You don't know what to do come up with some ideas. I but the this idea. This idea about getting out this God names exalts. Are you familiar with James? Oh yeah? Yes, of course, ok! So Yes, I think that's probably where I first yeah so James talks about the the idea of coming to come up with ten ideas for dinner, and I started actually doing that a few years ago. This come up with ten ideas per day. It becomes automatic where you just start coming up with ideas easily. These are not really good ideas and not necessarily actionable they may none of them may actually turn into anything. But if it
you cannot use a day, that's over three thousand ideas a year. So if you come up with just ten ideas, for I want to be a basketball player, what are ten things that I could do that could make me become a professional athlete who cannot talk to hook an idea. who has a Youtube video out there who's at the park across the street. What about this guy? Who lives next door? But it looks like a basketball player always has Jordans on what are ten things. You could do right now and ask the questions those people and somebody's going to know something is going to lead to something. So taking action I would say, is the number one thing that you do in your actions do not have to produce results. They don't have to be now. You don't have to be logical if you take enough back to the base or you will run into the person, knows the person who knows the person or someone who has the information, and
another thing. That's how people these days, like in two thousand and eighteen is unacceptable to be clueless, is unacceptable to not know what you could possibly do next. It is illogical to say that I've tried everything or I don't know what to do. Next, when there's people like yourself out there sharing your knowledge answering peoples, questions single. We have books, we got you choose, got blogs. How could you have another option, another resource, something else you can go to figure out. What's another way, I can make this work let let's say yeah? Let's summarize some of those parts before we go on, because people are joining the periscope as as they go so you've got the the visualizing. What you want, the affirmations or the right is sometimes writing it down sometimes visualizing. At the same time, you were building a skill stack, so you have options. You have different ways to go, yeah that you had a four year degree right in business management. Yes,
and so that gave you options, but you also your primary passion was to play professional basketball. So you had the skill stack, you had the visualization and then you did the James Alto sure thing where you're coming up with ten ideas a day Now I would call that habit there's a real good book called habit which is exactly what I was hoping you would say by the way. There's a point in this where you to turn the visualization into some kind of a habit. And your habit that you consciously determined was going to come up with ideas every day, lots of ideas, then the next part was at was action. probably the most important thing that people are going to want to hear How do you actually like get off the couch like that? How do you do the first thing and it sounds like don't. Let me put words in your mouth. This sounds like you were taking action without a
huge regard to whether this was exactly the right thing to do for the rest of your life, but you were saying: try this try this try this just sort of opening every door and seeing what's behind that door right now. What what? How do Now, would you call that a system of justice opening as many doors as you can until you find something I wouldn't I wouldn't call it a system then, but I could see how you could see it as a system looking back by connecting the dots right. What you do in just speak specifically about playing professional sports. There are these things called exposure camps. This is how, actually gotten some proofs and exposure camps like a job, fair Scott, so, but, instead of putting on in handing out your resume and shaking hands? You bring your equipment for your support and I know they do this. basketball. I don't know what other sports they do it and you actually play against two hundred other guys who want to play pro basketball and in the stands. Instead, it being fans there are scouts
it's coaches managers team owners from all around the world watching you put in your goal. There is to impress somebody you only got an impressive one person. So when I went to my first exposure camp, this was in two thousand and five. All I need to do is impress one person, and I know from watching basketball and playing so much You can make one plane again game, but that one place to be spectacular enough that somebody's impressive well hold. On that point 'cause I want to emphasize that that's such an incredible point. I find that was stops. People often is an incorrect view of their odds In other words, they think this is their overwhelming odds. I can't do this, but you were thinking that the odds were actually better than most people would think 'cause. You were looking at all these people and saying I only need one
I just need one person to say the right thing. Let me give you and I'm going to get right back to this, but when I tried to become a cartoonist, I sent out my samples through a bunch of different places, and my attitude was exactly that.
I only need one person to like it and exactly one person liked it and now we're talking years later. So let you get back to your story, so you're in you're in the tryouts. You only need one person to like you right and I've made some great plays there and somebody like you, somebody say road up. Basically what they do, though, is they make a scouting report. After that exposure came over there's only three days. They write down the scouting report for everybody who was there. They had video of everyone who was there and they put it up on the website. So I took that scouting report. This is a link to a web page and I had the footage now. This footage was on a thing called a vhs tape, and I know you know that Scott, maybe some people, don't remember Vhs. That footage actually became my first youtube. Video would started a parallel story, but I took that late and I called every basketball agent.
phone number Aqua, find in United States of America, I emailed them or called everyone in maybe seven or eight of them replied to my email or messages and called me back and was interested. Seven or eight. I make copies of my vhs tape and physically mailed that states in those agents. One of those eight agents call me that he became my first aid. He got me my first deal to play basketball. Overseas Ann is similar to what you say. It's got piggybacking on that. I heard someone say that the entertainment industry and whether we talking about publishing books, cartoons basketball, they call it a bandwagon business because nobody wants to mess with you when nobody knows you, but as soon as one person is on you, one persons interested now everybody's interested now everybody wants. Who is the over with this cartoon who's basketball player? Now everybody wants to jump on the bandwagon when now you don't need them when you need them, nobody wants you. When you don't need them, everybody wants.
right so so do have one person like you and then you're off now, This is so you have these. You had a a vision of the the whole plan I mean you need to do is find somebody, and then you would leverage that one thing to to, two more exposure, alright was there the one of agents or I guess the one scouts who first noticed you and gave you your break was there something they saw in you in particular, but they called out and said: oh you've got this one skill or quality or something was anything that they noticed in particular, I think so, but when I played basketball, my my calling card in basketball, at least in my early years, was my athleticism, so my ability to jump play above the rim and dump the basketball based and anyone who's watched. The basketball game knows that again,
he is probably to play you're going to remember more than anything else that happens again. It seems a little bit now. So when you got the three point shot and now people want to be stuff curry, back in my day, people want to be like MIKE Right would be Michael Jordan, dunking on everybody. So I had this one big Dunkin, that that exposure camp, that the whole gym just went crazy and after that game one of the scouts came up to me and he asked me a few questions. He one of the guys who was responsible for writing the scouting reports so because he was, he saw it and he was impressed by what he saw that help me get this glowing scouting report and then, when I sent it out to the agent the agent on scouting report, he wasn't at the camp, but he saw the footage. He saw the scouting report and said: ok, I can leverage this interested in. We can make something happen and that's exactly what I don't want. Somebody sees a dumb they're, seeing two things: they're saying you know the you have the athletic ability,
but isn't there also something about the attitude that gets you there? In the first place, I mean by the time you throwing the ball through the hoop. You you, you you're, like ninety percent attitude. Ten percent athlete at that point like That's that's got to come through. Doesn't so alright. So yeah alright. So So what? What parts do you pull out of your experience that you go to? First? that when you've got somebody who's just stuck, they can't put all the pieces together. Like you do. What do you find is like the the main lever that get somebody from doing nothing to doing something? Which is the big change right, the big change? Doesn't it doesn't even matter what you do if somebody is doing something they're, going to be more successful than the person who can't get off the couch. How do you do the first get off the couch
motivation, the first motivation has to be them believing that doing something can can result. When I found Scott is that people say things, but they are unwilling to take the action on it because they don't believe that taking these actions is going to actually produce the resume. They just don't believe that is going to work if you believe I'm going to work, you are willing to make call after calls, you have a book that you want to get published, you're going to go to every publisher. If you have a movie, you want to put out I'm going to go to every studio and get rejected, because you know there's some value in this, and people don't really believe it is what it is they want to do? They're not going to take the action on it, doesn't matter what you say doesn't matter, how you try to motivate them or push this if they don't see it actually working? That is not going to work now, if you're able to get someone to start taking action, and you can get them to take an action,
there is a small a little bit of result and they can see that. Then you can build on that, but you can always move a person to that action. Maybe there's a personal relationship with save your your kid or one of your best friends. You drag me to the gym and they start to get some results after a week. Then maybe they'll keep coming, but if you don't know In person or someone on the internet, you can't make. Take action. If they're not going to do it at some point, you have to have something that moves you off, your To at least try what you think will work, but if you don't believe it's going to work, nothing I say is going to change Now I had an experience that you reminded me of when I first became a famous author. I would still actually working in my day job and my coworkers came to be several of them and said hey. I think I would like to be a writer
for magazines or one wanted to write a book and these people who had never these are people would never written. A thing did not have any special writing talent and came to me and said: hey. I want to be a writer, so I encourage them told them. You know how to find people and here's the weird thing one hundred percent of them succeeded. One hundred percent, and it was all it was all because of that. That thing that you said earlier, which is people are not good at estimating the odds of success, So it turns out that, being you know, being the number one bestselling author of course is very hard, but getting published to somewhere and being a professional writer is a lot easier than people. Imagine and you know with working with editors and putting some effort into it. They pretty much all found some place to get published and got paid for it. So so probably the first thing is that people are bad at estimating the odds especially if they're willing to try a lot of stuff
that's the first thing and I have a little chip that I give people, which is that things that are going to workout, eventually always suggest themselves in the bad form, another words first time somebody made as a self a cell phone, the very first cell phone. It was always drop and then disconnecting and not working and blow a lot. But you could tell people still loved it had to have them, even with all the flaws, and I find that I've tried- I've tried, I don't know dozens and dozens of different business ventures, and I always just do the first thing: so, I said to myself: what's the first thing you do if you're going to write a book, welcome with the title right at first chapter maybe get some chapter outlines If you do that,
and then you look at it and you say my god. This is really interesting to me. It's it's pulling me along yeah, then that's good, and if, if nobody cares, if you don't care, then you drop that when we go to the next one. So do you find that the project itself has Paul you or or or because that's a big thing for me. Is there all the things I could do and I poke at the mall and what and one of them just grabs me and starts pulling Maine, and I wait for that. One 'cause. I can't can't motivate myself to do something I don't want to do, it has to pull me. So, do you do you do Do you think people should focus like a laser or try a lot of different things? What's better for motivation, try a lot of different things and see which one works. I mean it's hustler having a bunch of different hustles, going at the same time see what works. Even if it's in one specific area, like you, said, coming up with a title, writing that chapter.
Maybe coming up with a list of publishers who you going to call and get their phone numbers, get a contact name, get it email. Those people have a spreadsheet of it. So now you got a little bit of momentum. which you just created yourself and not tell you a quick story about pro basketball. That kind of showed goes right. So what you said is that The the result is going to show itself even when it's not actually working the first six. We kept on Wednesday was not the one that wasn't successful. Mom was a tryout for this small team in his small league called the ABA, and I don't know many people, idea for this team is in Lancaster, PA little small town. Now.
Every time I tell you it's hundreds of guys who want to play basketball, show up my first exposure camp. Three guys showed up. It was me in three other players showed up and wanted to players. He bailed out of it ten minutes in 'cause. He was in such bad shape. We were doing a four quart drill. He couldn't even participate, but the players, the coaches, who were there. They liked my game a little bit. They could know surmise from there only being three guys there. and invite me to the next morning density next month. Is there people weren't showing up? So even in those failures, I saw a little bit of success in my own, these pro coaches. Actually, like my game after I got, kicked off my team in college. So this was something because this is something this is a string to pull those little successes, even in failures of do show something, like you said: yeah there's uh. Sometimes I refer to that is the x factor, there's, sometimes something that you can't put your finger on. That makes something better than another thing, and you would probably noticing that in your own game very early on that there was something about
You in basketball, your body, the way you think that was just perfect. For this the same, so you you probably saw the the future in the bad version of yourself you could you could look for You're talking to Jay, bald expert on somebody just asked to re. Introduce you spurred on discipline motivation and mental toughness and of Miami and Dre working people find you. Social media on twitter at three all day, my instagram is: My name's Ray Baldwin one word, but what else is there I'm on Youtube My name's RAE Baldwin on my website is Dray all day dot com also mark as cold were. and then you do speaking and coaching uh So I do speaking coaching consulting writing of it.
For corporations organizations individuals- all of that. Yes, and he's appearing right now on the interface by when Hub app, where you can talk to experts. That's my startup, most of you know about that um, give me give me a few examples of things that people just don't think Gov things that when you tell people are a years a key here's, a here's, a technique, The people go wow. I wouldn't have thought of that. So something that's. You know that's that little extra sauce that you bring sure You know how, with confidence, that people want to be confident that you've heard of the techniques fake it till you make it heard it up I'm sure it's my it's. My motto is my life motto:
fake it till you make it now when it comes to that freezer, that this technique, some people think that it works perfectly. And then maybe you do. Some people think it's complete garbage. I've heard people even argue that they can see making to make you worse the thing about faking it till you make it is that, once you decide, going to quote unquote, take it and be you're going to be able to say I don't know a pro athlete, even though you're still an amateur. You want to be a millionaire, even though you don't have any money in your account or whatever situation as soon as you make that decision to become that person you're, not actually safety, you're, actually being it, it becomes real.
because in a moment that I decided I'm going to present myself as this person who I'm I'm wasn't two minutes ago, once I decide to be it I'm being, and it will last as long as you decide to keep making it less because human beings, we don't have the brainpower, to look at everything we see and ask ourselves. Ok, is he being for real? Is he faking it just to disperse Israeli is? Are they are they trying to something that they're not. We just have to accept things on the surface, because we don't have the brainpower, to examine every little tiny thing. It's kind of like that movie catch me if you can, with a frank, Frank, Abic Abagnale, but once in his name right out with it, go around places that pretend to be something he was so convincing that people were like doing whatever he said to do, because he assumed the position so much and the problem people have with faking it till you make it. If you want to call it. That is that they have it in their mind. Eighty percent of their mind
and I'm thinking this is not real. Are people going to figure me out? How long can I keep this up is because you're thinking that that's the exact thing keeping it from working, so it's important just dive in one hundred percent into it and immerse yourself in that faking it. It would become so real immediately and you would see results so quickly that you would, You be astonished as to why you had done soon. So I'm thinking of writing a book about the mental things that people do that are holding them back, and one of them is that the worst advice either the worst advice. I've ever heard is be yourself. Because his first of all, if being yourself, was good enough, you know you're done hey, I'm just being myself, I'm poor and I'm hungry and nobody likes me, but I'm being myself now My observation of life is that nobody is themselves like,
If it were just main I wouldn't have shaved, I wouldn't be wearing clothes. I mean everything you do should be in the context of a a society or culture of family you're connected to all that stuff you're, not some like floating free floating variable. Your variable is everybody, and if you're not doing something that other people like you're not succeeding, I mean. Ultimately, you need to make yourself into something that other people care about and one pay for want to be around around. Will she have done nothing so and I also believe this is the doctor- Laura philosophy- that you are what you do you're, not you're, not you're mental thoughts on the inside. It's why you do so it could be the worst person on the inside? But if you spend your whole day doing charity work in helping people. That's who you frigging are. You're, not those bad thoughts. You had you're the person who is actually doing stuff
So you're faking it till you make it thing reminds me of that which is the king. It is actually doing something right, you're actually doing it. The doing it makes it you that's so you are you're the person doing right. So yeah, I'm totally on board with that. But how do you you seem to have an unnatural will, not unnatural. I had a natural. It seems like you're born with it confidence which- I think I was born with as well. I mean six years old. I was sure something was going to workout. Wasn't sure a lot and that's never changed. How do you? How do you help somebody get? to a kid to be comfortable with confidence. Is it just by observing their own success in small ways? Is that the main thing? No? I don't think so. I think the main way for someone to build confidence is to start with
open edge are actually good at it. It's kind of like you talk about the skill stat. What is it skills that you actually had and develop more and more of those skills world the brand. Now, as the world continues, the more skills people have the more options. You're going to have more options will be available to you because every day, there's some new way popping up for people to build success. I guess if we want to call it that so the number one thing is to start with something that you're actually good at. Are you good at speaking to an audience or you go to talking to it, camera. Are you good at talking to people one on one, you good at writing. Are you good at being funny on Youtube? What is it that you are actually good at? Do the thing that you're good at it then expand from there expand from where you're actually getting results and keep going outward from there. So the number one way of building that where? Where are you good? Now? Don't try to force it, but I haven't found what I find Scott is. A lot of people are trying to force themselves to be good
things. Did this not good that they just don't have the ability? They don't have the talent they don't have the natural inclination. Like. I wasn't good at basketball when I first started, but I have some talent, you know I'm tall, I can run fast, I can jump. I got long arms though I'm black so maybe those are good things that possibly work for basketball players, so I I often tell people that if they're trying to build their personal talent stack, you know their their collection of skills that make them unique. It's good. If you start with at least one thing that you've got a natural advantage So in my case I'm a little more creative than the person, but I added to that a mediocre drawing talent, artistic talent, modest, but I,
try hard the much the way you train hard. I can just try hard to to draw and then you know writing for you have to produce at it how to make a cartoon stuff, but I had to start with something that I was a little naturally good at. So I'm right with you on that advice, sewer, let's get ready to close down, I like to keep these periscopes under a certain time so that they don't run too long an I really enjoy this. And in the comments give me some comments about what you liked about this in particular, and is there drugs or anything you want to say that baby? I didn't ask something: that's like a big point that that We would all be lacking if we had not heard for the two things that we both we both intestinal one is that the whole fake it till you make it seem as soon
you decide once we have a clear, clear goal. What it is you want to be you need to be in order to achieve your goals, assume that position and become that person right now? It will automatically change your actions and that will change the results. The other thing is when you were talking about what you do with who you are. I tell people that often often hear people say something like well, it's what I do, but it's not who I am that's garbage you do is how people are going to judge you. They do this. Someone says well, does not work eighty hours a week in finance, but that's not who I am that's the only thing, what, if someone is describing you that's the only thing they can say words in finances. I never see him anywhere else right at the bar is not the parties not at the birthday he's at work. So what you do is, who you are, if you want to change who you are all you need to do is change your accent, change your actions. You must change paint iq or thank yourself
booking beer, and you can decide to change that at any given moment how long it lasts is one hundred percent, your choice? There's another piece of advice: I give people, especially young people, and I say this is the most important thing. You'll ever learn you're going to hear this from me now I'll, tell you if I'm talking to a young person- and I say you're not going to believe it was sooner or later. This is going to come back to you and you're going to believe it later. 'cause you're going to see enough examples, and it goes like this Everybody is faking all the time everybody is a little less confident than they want you to see everybody's showing themselves a little bit better light than maybe they're thinking on the inside and if you think the other people are more confident than you. You simply mistaken because other people are insecure on the inside and once you realize that it's really a level playing field,
because the the mistake is to think The things that are happening in your head, your personal insecurities or whatever are somehow unique and that other people have got it figured out because they're acting like they haven't figured out, but they are acting. And when you learn to act and fake it till you make it, then then it's a level playing field. I love this conversation, but let's not go too long people, I'm saying great comments here, so people are really enjoying this and so Dre Baldwin. Thank very much for this. This was a tremendous time I'm going to I'm going to sign off of periscope and then I'll keep you on and will wrap up over here, I want to say goodbye. this by everybody on periscope Scott. Thank you for having me. I've been a fan energy one officer years ago, so I'm finally glad to be able to connect and talk to your audience. You don't care. So thank you very much for being here hit me up on twitter.
questions. I answer right and your twitter is again one more time at three all day on Twitter, We all do all day, all right, that's it for today bye for now.