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- The definition of charisma
- Dating and relationship advice
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The post Episode 922 Scott Adams: Feel Better Before Drifting Off to Sleep Later. Learn a New Filter on Reality. appeared first on Scott Adams' Blog.
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Bump bump bump, bump, bump, bump, bump bump bump bump Ajax, lady and super eighteen first, they and their scope of other
ah good evening air and then
damn then, could see you do well
Yes, you might know, there's not a lot going on in the world of coronavirus. We are not learning much more and we're not getting better informed, but I'll tell you what I know and then, if you stick around or if you stick around I'll, give you some relationship tips,
relationships, because if you want to learn how to have a successful relationship who do ask
Obviously me now, I don't have all the answers in this domain or even close, but I'll give you a different different way to look at things it might be useful to. You will do that after we talk about all the things in the news, as I've been waiting to hear this number and I heard estimate and now
I don't think it's accurate, but I'll tell you what is I've been wondering how many tests we would have to do per day of the growth of errors?
In order to be able to open up the country,
Isn't that a really important number? How many of you can give me the answer
where I tell you the answer, which I think is inaccurate.
Before I tell you they Ezra? How many would know how many tests we would need to be able to do per day, I'm going in order to
I've. Gotta do I sticks and hammer move with my cat.
Throw over my shoulder, I have it if he is listening to those who need another recently with the cap, lives room and she just when suddenly quieter.
I was, I think I am
somebody waiting waiting for your guess is only test we'd have to do today. I just read on CNN that we would need to do five hundred thousand a day.
And there were doing
over hundred thousand a day now, yes,
Greece has half a million. You hurt you're up on your news, whoever said half a million. That is
Leslie number, that CNN was reporting, and I tweeted just before I got. I saw tweet furtive attack them. Who said he
numbers up to a million now. This is not really the kind of thing that anybody has a a wave
estimating. So this is
sort of thing where you have to be was a very forgiving about the experts estimate, this is probably not any real way to know how buddy you have to test per day, but I think they can sort of put you in the year. The generals Zip code of the number it lets say it
half a million to a billion, and we ve got a little over a hundred thousand. Now sue really Klaus, and I guess the question I have is: how quickly could we re Bob from not doing that?
to do in a million that so
I should tell you one ear when you're safe to get back to work, but I think the states do their own thing. What do you think about the fact that the president has now only told the states that they can make their own decisions with them within the guidelines, but they have plenty of flexibility, but then he D, tweeted, liberate Michigan and then liberate Minnesota, Livery Virginia dimension. The second amendment when he was talking about
Virginia add some people said: wait a minute is calling for a revolution. Is he going
for an orange revolution. Well now, because he's in charge, why would you call for an hour revolution against the government is in charge of now? I know we're talking about the states, but now now the president doesn't want some kind of insurrection, but I'm sure you wouldn't mind a little better protesting about
the stuff lips, maybe even live. So this is a good example of what I would call creative tension. Nobody
knows the right answer and also that a million times anybody who says they know when we should go back to work or how long we should wait, we're even how we should do it or how many tests we need
nobody really those. Not only do we not now we're, probably not even than the general ballpark. You know, I don't think anybody Zeebrugge close to doing yet the big stuff, so they said, was watched the number of tests, and maybe we can your backward test of a reliable ever when I say that creative tension is that, I think is good that some part of the public and the president are put in place
sure other states to open up the as early as I can cause this creative pressure. A you know, you would want the president to have the same impulse as the public is he's really gonna, reading the crowd and I think he is red, the crowd, at least in those important states, swing, states, etc.
Are they all swing states, the sooner they Virginia Minnesota, Michigan, whether opera, important electoral electoral. These speaking so, I think this work for the president to side with the public as long as all it is, is peaceful demonstrating and if there is one thing that republic is good at its peaceful demonstrators. Is there any group in any identifiable group in the United States, there would do a better job consistently.
Of peaceful demonstration. Now they may come armed to the teeth, but nobody is taken. The safety of Republicans urges notoriously save when they protest added, or maybe
The beast some kind of you can imagine a situation in which things are done.
Too far than they would be the most dangerous people in the galaxy, but were now we're nor near that we're talking about negotiating what makes sense in a world where
Everybody has tried to do the right thing. You don't really have a revolution when you know that everybody involved is actually tried to do the right thing.
The there's nobody years trying to grab Bower the other place in Games and Congress, but that's not the big story,
so you don't have a revolution when everybody knows run the same team they just they just have a disagreement about the way forward.
So I would say that that is a much safer situation. Then maybe the news would like to make it so that you feel little more frightened, but you you could poor ten million trumps borders into a sub goad angry is hack armed to the teeth and they would be
No trouble like that, that's pretty much who they are almost day, is almost a description of the group
zero per ten million government at the seams of goat angry is held.
Armed to the teeth and no
It will work. This is almost a perfect description of of that group.
I was just watching clip from talking across and showed which you say that the intelligence community is now unanimous. Intelligence community is budget.
Organizations rights, CIA Fbi, blah blah
Nearly all of the intelligence agencies are unanimous, that the virus almost certainly came from the war lab accidentally, nobody
There is no suggestion that it was designed to be a weapon. Now
is there anything that you see wrong with the fact that every one of our intelligence agencies agrees? Does that make you feel pretty comfortable, because
everything that scares me it's all the intelligence agencies agreed.
Do we live in a world in which the fact that all the intelligence agencies agrees means anything
I wish it did. I wish it well
something. Unfortunately it doesn't it doesn't now, I'm not saying that the wrong, because our I know I'm just saying that
It is a matter of its satirist fortunate I get him. Tom is good news and bad news, but I can tell you that I personally put no stock in the fact that Oliver intelligence agencies is the all seventeen agencies. Yet I put no stock in that. I give no credibility to the fact that our intelligence agencies we there was none, not not even a smudge. Now do. I think it came from the lab here. Probably
I think you're probably did, but I don't need the intelligence agencies to tell me that if it is true that it is a bad there, that's true refer these stories about the.
The inter- was true. They do their work. Their two plus two yo YO have to be an intelligence agency. To do to put that together, I think now we get in the car. She gave me a hundred
percent sure, but I think is very close to ordered
how many of you have taken the opportunity of this forced timeout to improve something?
You have asked us before, but I like to ask the least once a week how many of you have done something
There was a long overdue to build the skill to maybe look into another career to improve something about your self. U K in in the comments, gimme some sense.
Just in the sentence did you lose any weight? Did you learn a thing you did you make?
any any proven in your life because she had time slot. There's little delay in the comments will take me well see those sought out either. In my case, I think I've lost several pounds.
I'm immigration, even better than never. Even before I've completed to projects business wise, they were really important to me. You'll hear more about whose work at all it s, good summary of learning, german, cooking, songwriting skills started exercising sums up, started, biking built a picnic cable course: strength, better, throw tomahawks
learn to weld moves. Tapes to files, computer programming, automating stuff, writing a book securities certification, good! That's a good good think there.
Learning sign language throughout our workload equipment are. This is amazing, I'm so proud of all of you. You read my book. Loser think sake. You exercise, exercise quit smoking. Forty five minute walks good for you will always people
listen, wait, I'm very impressed with already really learn just buy up, reduce material possessions. Well, ok, that's probably wasn't your
is building a dog s neighbour, less icy, improving on camera skills, better biceps.
Declared walking the William off method by granting while quit opiates as real. But if you did,
You have my respect, it was, I know how,
That is good.
And wait. Laundries piling up wells, networking friendly shorter, says two hundred fifty pushups daily, while writing song buildings shock and ass. I am so oppressed. Well, I thought what I'll do today.
Add a little bit more to your success. So I'm gonna teach you some relationship, tips and track.
So this is a new filter to prolong life. Irish talk about
reality being at least a little subjective in terms of how you experience and that you can change your filter is simply have a different subjective experience
you learn to do that. So let me give you another filter and really learning to do. It is just being familiar that the filter exists. You don't have to.
I do hard if it once you ve been introduced to a new way to look at things while it's just I was there his party or toolbox. So as simply a two tier toolbox starts like this, let's say you want to impressive.
I believe that, just about everything that we do in this world summit
related to the mating instinct? Now, of course, this is me saying this alone. This is be, I think, very similar to what biologists and evolutionary biologists, especially when they say that they're pretty much everything
do is some kind of a signal laying or or preparing for or because of our meeting instinct. Now that's that's the filter that I want to give you so start with that.
Let's say you want to build a better relationship where you want to start a relationship with somebody and you haven't service. So if you
this filter and say: ok, if
things about mating, even if we don't think of it that way, how would you act differently and here's? What I would suggest
you should always in the animal kingdom the way they will attract a day would be showing off and you don't pick out can show off and uttered off. That's really baiting Thank butler sailors by animals will sort of display and show off, and you try to be dominated stuff, but most of us that doesnt work in human society does, if you try to challenge somebody to you a horn.
Contest that doesn't go well. If you tried it just yell her great, you are in public that doesn't really well. I know I've tried, and so what do you do? If your human, you still have to signal some kind of reproductive quality and here's what I suggest you should find something
or ideally more than one thing they. U can be unusually good at.
And his should either demonstrate that you're, smart or strong or talented athletic
anyone musical your any one of those talents were skills or or quality is, if you can figure out how to hold any of those starting with whatever you're good at but see if you can become really gonna, something just by brute force in practice, and then you have to figure out how to
broadcast it. That's the hard part, so you might need a wing man or wing woman to say, hey,
Do you know she's, not just good luck and she's also
You she's one of the best doctors in the world or whatever. So you should have a wing person or some other indirect way to signal that you have qualities that people want to meet with, and if you ask people a, why are you attracted why let me get to humor in a moment s big! That's a mistake: if U S somebody aid and make a list of all the things that attract you in a mate, they make a list, but it would be all wrong as people don't really know why they like what they like. So nowhere on the list would be. This person displayed goods
genetic material and I think, making a baby with his person would cause them to be smarter, NEO, athletic or strong, or something whatever. That quality is. Nobody would say that they say stuff like well. Somebody who loves his
other you'll be a completely unaware list. So that's that's the wrong filter through the the wrong filters that people are rational. They make their checklist Lizzie up any this. Unless this
a little bit. They're. Certainly some things that people just need. You don't have to talk the same language, yum some basics, but I think the people are just biological
figured by being rude. Anybody you, as some strong quality in an almost as a better wanted it any really
strong quality is automatically triggers your biological instinct to say, while all day with such your first Rick so use
filter that everything that everybody does and says the way they dress when they talk here that the jobs they take is all some kind of expression of the meat, the mating instinct, even if they are trying to
somebody said sense of humour. Here's my next Tipp, nobody likes that of your men, especially men. Men. Have you ever been told that your women really like a guy with a sense of humor,
you probably heard it. Probably probably women have told you that other women have said here. One of the things I like about, you sure sense. Humor, you probably heard lots of people say: that's a pause of quality talk about their majors
really funny? It's all a lie. It's all a lie if, if you're a guy- and you want to attract a woman, don't do it with the jokes now
My dogs, having your dream, dream working in the other room. If you hear that now that say that couldn't be somebody in the world who is just so funny that that they really sell themselves with their humor
but I do you were for living and I gotta tell you I've never seen it work in any candidly you're YO dating.
Situation is greater, have is greater, add on if you retracted anyway, but I think humor
humor sort of pushes you into the friends zone if mean humor, takes away some of the seriousness and power for most people again the convenience
caption somebody's just so funny in just the railway works, but in general,
I will hold off on the jokes a little LEO gentle humor fide until until you actually interrelationship
Christy did, I were were literally crying like
light were laughing sword.
I'll tell you why were laughing? I just so. You can get a sense of that, but in early days I was that I was not trying to showcase my sense of humour, because this is not a good strategy. Here's what we're laughing banners!
was telling Christina that I would be immortal in the sense that, once my physical body went by mine would be uploaded into the into the cloud which I mean seriously and then eventually the technology would be such that I could appear as a hologram, and I would just
appear wherever she was in the future here, I'm assuming that she endlessly should share assumption out hotter as going through all the different ways out Hunter like was she opens refrigerator.
Hologram. We just go eight jumper the refrigerator and she goes into the bathroom.
Children's lives. I want my hologram, just jump out of the toilet, go hey and I would just think it was really funny and I'll be like the funniest ghost hologram of all time now just sort of appear
or or she's. Wake up in the middle of the night not be laying on top of her, but it was justly by hologram would actually can actually feel it so anyway,
So we started going through all of the humorous things that my hologram would do well to start wanting her for eternity and just a period when the house in different places- and we just started by screaming and crying because it was
funny, but there were no longer relationship, in which case humours great it's great and a long term relationship. This is not really a course of things, so so to meddle with it. Otherwise you end up in the friends of
I think that there is probably one thing: the matters more than just about anything, except maybe power and status. Those rose good but Fennis than the one most approachable thing. The one thing you of the most control
is your fitness, and this is something that day
soon salesman taught me years ago there was a big, the coolest life lessons,
I was there. I was buying suit and assume salesman was rooted salesman and I usually get up study lifetime with yourselves, but if you're buying a suit- and I was making some self deprecating humor about the fact that it didn't matter what my suit looked like cause, if you, if you're basically Shore ball guy with glasses, there's just so much you can do, is not like you can you can fix that with a good suit. So I was just making a soft deprecating joke. Killing time was having my suit faded, and these salesman gave me the best of the best advice. I've earned my life and he said,
Thus, he said that if you, if you work out and get your body and young you better than normal shape, so that young people recognise a year above average and you're, just U Fitness
You said nobody will notice your bald laughed because, unlike well, that's that's a little too far right. You can't you can exercise until people don't notice your bald, then I noticed he was bald had noticed. Hadn't noticed until he told me because he was users ripped and so what I saw him, even though he was your dress suit himself you could telliers is just was ripped, and so he had to tell me use bald. I think I think if I had done ass, an artist,
sketch. I dont know if I want to draw drawn him without air, and then you see that yourself right, you gotta the Jim, and you see that the person whose atta shape and their bald and that their just bald, and then you see the person what by whose ripped shaved his head he's not bald right he's just gonna look. So this is where these great things that this Sue salesman Tommy, I swear, I think, is mainly work harder because Europe is not just tell you feel and not just about your health. It's all those things too, but is also a cool illusion,
It's an optical illusion. You can look taller, you can look younger, you can look, sexier, look smarter, it'll do more.
Capable and you can look
give hair- and I have to do- is take area physical fitness. So if somebody
giving you dating or relationship advice, and it doesn't include work on your fitness, then dismissing a huge part. I've told you before that date
definition of charisma that I heard from somebody Else- and this is just such a good formula for this- is empathy plus power- you ve been talk about this
so? The apathy is knowing that you care about. Somebody
when the power is. Can you make things happen because, if you're a relationship you want somebody who cares about you and also can make things happen, so you're looking for a charisma in your partner? So what are so? If you're trying to be you look like a good mates, then you should look like you care. Ideally, you should actually care it's better, it's better if you actually care, but the reality is we all have to signal weak are carrying on the inside
enough in their society, we live in, you have to care and away the people, see zig, they get. It yields silently suffering with your empathy, no one,
was that they want to know the year. You got empathy
so Devil show your empathy, but also make sure you show your power if your guy
So this is more guy guy advice, but I would say that it would apply to women, mostly because you are women. The woman should be other that it can have power of of her own Julio Guess, probably worse. Both ways will maybe a little little emphasis in one direction. Here's another thing: I find that relations
works best when you ve got a good understanding of whose who's got, what responsibility in powers and stuff so try to try to make everything. Fifty fifty
It's probably the worst relationship system
because you're always gonna, be arguing that one of you didn't do it ass cycle,
I worked all day today. Did you do the dishes, so I've never been a fan of the split down the middle I'll. Do the dishes, the snake? You do the dishes,
next day, it's it's hard to organise, etc, is much better. If, if the two of you just sort of agree who does what and you just do your own thing
and they don't overlap that much so there's.
And I can tell you a little trip that I discovered years ago when I was in one of those.
Relationships so years guys at a relationship where we are trying to chair the household duties and stuff
But the problem was that lets say my ex say that she wasn't around and there was something that broken down
and I was like work all day, fixing out of the plumbing or cleaning up the mess with a cat vomited on the rug or something
So are we spending hours cleaning something up, but what is clear up is done. There is no sign of it and then you you're particles, home and does the dishes and then says. Well I did the dishes, and what do you do
So we have this problem. We didn't. We didn't have visibility of who is doing what caused so much of the things they get done. The other one would notice leisure the room, so we developed a credit system. One like this. You would be responsible for advertising why you did no matter how minor so we're just say, credit for cleaning up that debt burden. The backyard.
And then the other world would have to say credit here just to evaluate and you'd be amazed. How, when you take the onus offer the offer your partner, you take the owners of your partner to somehow know what you're doing
Could I have seen the comments of he says that sounds terrible Scott. It does doesn't. It sounds like a bad idea. Doesn't it you have to try it because it unless they weren't you through it, there's no formula that works for me, cobbler based different, but if you simply,
announce that you did something. Then both of you are just announcing what you want credit for, and you don't have to worry about, not getting credit cuz. If you didn't announce the you did, it was your own. Damn fault,
so we just became more of a game to say an incredibly,
the scope for doing that- and it was just outages ITALY to outward organic.
So we didn't do anything Beverly. We just increase the visibility and then fell better
so. He says, keeping score is a bad idea. That's why I think you should just you have.
Some understanding about what your domains are, so that there's no keeping score or just people taking care of business, but if you're going to try to cut it down the middle. Just beware that you don't know what your other, what the other ones doing all day, so they might be doing more than you think,
then I would say: look for people were flaws. You can stand because you can't really find people who don't have any problems. You don't have.
So. He says by my axe hated that that's because you didn't agree in advance that the system is not
One of you can do. You
just unilaterally say give credit for my stuff. If the other one is the plan, so I can see whether it be a problem way salute for people who have the kind of flaws, a robot, because we are always different.
There are some things that people care stand and there's are some things that people like, for example, Christine robots like a low dive.
Will as much as we like being with each other. We both her interviewers by nature, but since we both had that quality is perfect. When you know it's in a way, if, if an inch of her and extra get together extension, but if two insurers get together like they problem solved, series on four people were
the chi. I don't even want to call that a flies just difference. Do you want to find people whose difference is two together and then I would say, never get in a relationship with somebody who has a dog.
I'll, say that again never started relationship with somebody. You already owns a dog and cat fur, obviously silent about that. For a moment, I was safe in the comments. This is anybody who knows
I'm talking about the governor of the you know, I'm talking about so half of yours surprised, and I think it's the women right is. These women are mostly
rising like walk. Why would you not gather relationship with somebody already had a dog liquor, the covered so like every evil or agree with me?
I'll get a relationship for somebody who already has a dog
let me tell you why
you will never be more important than the dog. Sorry,
Those of you who were knowing exactly what I said you ve already experienced it.
If you get into relationship was only already has a dog
every date, you'll start that you'll start date will be like in seven p m. I really have to go back and let my dog out like you're, serious
Wake up the Saturday night we have to you're done, you got to go back and let your dog out, I mean I'm just making up that example. But, and then the dog will not let you be together when you're in the house, the dog will take all the attention the dog will be all all here. She talks about there's just because about the dog
yeah, so yet, if it is to have you get together and then you get a dog well that can work. That can be five, but you don't want to compete with somebody's dog care. What's dog came first year.
We look at the comments that there are so many guys. I know who got into relationship with somebody who had a dog and they thought well ok and day. One. The dog is more important than me right. We own day to share the dog, is more important than maiden babyish,
she's, firstly weeks I get it and maybe even for a few months I get you ve been with a dog along time, so yeah I get in the beginning. The dog would be more important than me, but vengefully vengeance.
I'll make up the difference, eventually all be more important than the dog nope,
now the second happened when about parrots liable experience, the parent situation, one is both have dogs, while I could work alone
so he says so don't date, people with kids. Well, I will give you advice like that, but
I will tell you that if you do that
People with kids asian going
with a realistic understand.
Think of where our priorities lie. If you're not ok with that, then you should know that from day one is it's not like you gotta move up in the writing and become more important than some of these children.
What that were. Somebody says I outlined the dogs moved the dogs. I love your strategy like well.
He's gonna burrow in I my life expectancy is, I noticed dogs life expectancy is
and you play the longer. We wait till the dog dies
that was a major watched Hoechst. It is amazing. Somebody said.
Yeah. I've told you before. If you watch and you should watch the documentary Hoechst like surges documentary, I believe it still is the number one documentary on Itunes of all documentaries. They is number one and I think it less. I checked it was number two of all time on Itunes of all time, so deftly worth it. But here's way suggestion if you do watch it you should.
Set aside some time to make sure you watch the whole thing, so don't go watch part of it and take a break Yeats, really sort of a masterpiece. If you dont experience it from beginning to end in his fullness, you you're gonna, do
a really good. Second half
Living with kids is bad strategy, less progress, probably
If you do move up whenever ragpickers run, you don't want to win their contents right. If you found other acid.
That's my wife died and she got another
That was always says by steps and is the reason I married my wife well rush. You should say that public, but-
all right. I don't have much else to to teach you today and I will see you in the morning and have a good night.
Transcript generated on 2020-04-19.