Hi my name is hand. I binder- and I feel confused about being, an orion's friend, I love the honesty. What's the confusion is I'm not? I don't see myself, I changed my maker and I'm seventy seven years old, you phone back to work and pay their and welcome.

two Conan o Brien needs a friend podcast, where I I tried of passive aggressively force people to my friend factually working. I've made a bunch of pretty decent friendships through the pie cast and they never last people, even if they have a good time on the pod, cast quickly go grow. Weary that's just happens, but I'm joint is always by my faithful team. Mr Mann, how are you met pretty. Well. How are you I'm fine, Do you think most people leave the packet feeling fairly satisfied or having a better impression of me. The sense that these are real friendships that are formed, or do you do you think that it makes and so they usually only last about a month or so I was gonna, say I think they are friendships until you phrased it that way, because it sounds like you're doing a corporate surveyor is your friendship with many satisfying very satisfying, yeah. I get a little media that way I should probably just relax

I think it also hurts that I do with several of many of the Pike S guess: try to sell em, something like what citing vine citing yeah, then its feeling, like a scam to them a year, and I it's true, I am very interested. I did investing no vinyl, citing business. Where is that? Why you're doing this by cancelling? Let's just say it's complicated the world of cardinal brine, ok and there's a lot of things that feed the things I can not seen any of his citing money. I've seen your house since the right house for finally etc. Yes, you have kind of a ranch style, single story, house there are more of a trailer than anything else. That's so vinyl siding with putting a sorry, silk hat on a pig, you're calling vinyl citing a silk hat, no one senior house, I swear to God. I thought that's where they shot Sandford, and so I was pretty sure I do

When I heard a lot about Far Palm David Harry you I'm great, you don't worry, I'm gonna come. I would ask you guys a question which is I've, never liked wearing a baseball cap. I have neither I dont like baseball caps. I dont think they fit my face from my head. When I put a baseball cap on it, makes my life face? Looked swollen and fat it accentuates the sort of cherubic nature or blue. But it nature of an irish fellows head. So I dont, like I dont like a baseball cap. and so by what I discovered a long time ago. Was it when I do whenever I do a bit for the shower sketch. Did you look at your watch? You just? What did your watch? even happened. Just looked at his watch and middle and I love making a god and a buzz now now I didn't personally are unyoking, Sir, that the silence it was silence that it want to interrupt routers thing, the edges, so that's the most brutal.

That is the route is thing. So sorry, I'm in the middle of creating my art, objection, Pollack, I've got to tubes of paint and abroad shit, I'm splattering at all over the place. It's gonna be in moments and they write about that this pact s is the equivalent of attacks and it depends on how you feel about Jackson, Pollock, I'm just saying the audio is equivalent to the vis. Ok, my point is that I'm a beloved american treasure They trade raided treasure. I laid so somebody later this prevents word on purpose to give the the Prague Castle more life. I think, the treasure and american treasure, and and and I think that that when I'm making my magic man, you look at your word.

Much less and I give such a hard time all the time. I've never seen her look at my wife. Ok, when I'm making my mind magic, I just want to say I felt it start to vibrate size. Afraid I was getting your column was gonna silence it generally hey get off from now. On when you put it in a can have lead box may like I'm, taking off right now. Ok, can you throw it outside the open the door and throw it down on the floor to have to wait David, you should know that we do offer exit therapy on all of these sessions were anyone whose aghast store occur. You know sidekick gets to go into complimentary therapy. It's from human resources place back to want to hear about the baseball caps. Yes, back to what I call my word magic, I dont like a baseball cap. I don't think it looks good. I mean it frustrates me that that became dear rigour, clothing for everybody? Every man has to have a baseball cap, and everywhere I go. I see guys in their 30s 40s 50s 60s, wearing a baseball cap, and I think it looks stupid now. I've done

sketches in my day, being comedy veteran and occasionally I have two were a cowboy hat and I realize I look fucking good in a cowboy hat. I really think I do and I know the thinking oh! No, he doesn't. I do I look at the cowboy had so today I noticed from yours. So I did a remote in Texas and someone give me a really cool cowboy hat and I put it on and I like it, but I think people think I'm doing a bit during the cowboy hat, but I just like the way it works. So my question for you, David and also for EU matters. Can I pull off a cowboy I'm afraid of putting the whole of the heading four years following the high just coded. I I don't know, but I forgot I was wearing headphone. I'd put it like that. You put its

I sat in my office has on the whole thing is also love that I built up to a big, but I'm going put this on and you're going to see and hear legal clunk phones. I don't even want to see the proper way you know. I do agree that you can pull that off better than a baseball gap- to be honest, what do you think a man? I want you to be honest. What do you think? I think it looks good. I think you got get back on your head a little bit. It was a little like you know right. Chance when you wanna be kind of roguish player, you want to read it, but if I put it back too far, I look like it looks like I'm doing a bit, No, I don't think side. I dont think you need to go that far, but just a little bit because I'm putting my headphones on so there if it takes a little confidence to cock a backup

but I'll bet that you're at ease like a cowboy yeah. That's nice! You got a little bit a lock of your bangs coming out. Oh am getting a no from some people on this. It only comes down that far when you're sleeping you know, when you, you kind of put it over your eyes, cats, forty, I like that, but he never takes it off. I dont trust. I dont trust that you have my best interests at heart man. I don't. I don't do you want me to wear it and look like a fool. I think you keep the headphones on. When you were here, I will start wearing headphones even out in the world headphones that have along cord that aren't attached to anything, gets the word out on the podcast, and then I put I put this on time but that in its sits I haven't my has the listeners,

though, that the the bar that goes over the headphones is super thick. So this cowboy hat is resting inches above the top of his head, buys yeah. It is a western Yamaha right now, just up your ass parts to the very top super still so does fall off like your web browser. What I'm gonna do I'm gonna walk around. That's out of my head? You know. I know it's a visual joke, but I'm sure we'll get this out on the internet. You'll see you can go on the sites and the clicks and the Claxton you who in who in Hulu and you'll, find it by the way I do? I know the business or do I know the business. You really know it, but this This is my new look even move different. Why is it how is it is basically just resting on top of three inches thick rubber, I dont know why we're using the headphones that people used. You know in Korea to communicate with the battlefield fight. I do what

if you see me out in the world and I'm I'm hard to miss? But if you see someone that looks like Jane Lynch wearing a big cowboy had that's me, me- and you know it's also funny- is that you know covered, I have a MAC but I also have I have this bandanna, this red bandanna and I had the cowboy had on and walked into a seven eleven and I put the bandanna up over the bridge of my nose. You saw as the Euro with Armenia, and I wasn't even thinking about anything I just forgot. I had the cowboy had on I put the bandanna over my nose and and I went and bought a windows, energy power bars and it looked like Jesse James had come in the store to run them of a power by are so suddenly on Jesse James, its eighteen, eighty two and I might get routine, but how much which fat and which saturated fat in this bar and just like, I'm robbing them, but then I'm getting into the weeds about

much nutrition does. It have The workers seem nervous inert. Yes, I know that you tried to cash like was that a fifty year I hadn't fifty dollar bill and- and I will try to buy a power bar with fifty dollar bill, while wearing a cowboy hat and a curtsey. If over my nose, all you could see was my eyes. Oh MIKE, the woman was looking at the bill she's in a seven eleven she's. Looking at the bill like this is obviously a fake. There sure thought it was clear that he's about to pull a cold forty five yeah an end the gun on us and rob abolishing the button and rob she was desperately pressing the button to some the police and five. on tat side with the power bar, I would have been shot to death. I am pretty sure that the power bar I think the police would have shot me just because a I'm dress like a bandit, but second they will show me, be as the power bar ahead way too much saturated fat from supposed to be a healthy option and I think that's they're allowed to shoot in that situation.

Anyway, I'm just and then stick with a cowboy had look nice. Why? Good luck? Gray should do you, I mean I salute Yet how can you do? You doesn't mean Conan, where a cowboy had it does, of course, little bucker through Sunday I'll beat you a bit about the potential. This was a hundred or you'll, never get on the same room with you will use a cudgel when I beat you, never never see you in a flash use or is it a flat? What are those things that these they had people with flat Jack Blackjack black jack? You hit me with a flap jack. That was the originals pat Benatar version. They shouted certainly with the flap jack and they got some radio play with them. They recorded it little known lie here. We go very excited my guest today as a town

did actress and comedian who was just nominated for an Emmy for her role as EVA Daniels, India, critically acclaimed HBO Mac Series hacks by the way. I am a big fan of facts. I think it's a fantastic show, I love it and I'm thrilled to talk to her today Hannah I binder welcome. you have certainly I didn't notice and again whenever someone special to something by saying I don't mean to sound creepy they sangree yeah you have absolutely beautiful. Skin rank gorgeous skin and I was think looking you came in, and just before you got on MIKE. You mentioned something about a sun screen and I thought you and I are very much alive. I am looking to play you in the biotech, so I'm really here

the higher cat, a colors items on already. You know it's between you and Kate, Blanchett Well and wrestler. For it I dont care and no man has stepped forward playing the role. I got that or so all I need is the legs. That's it! You have a lot of long gated torso! I do you use that you say you are very well proportioned again hearing we thing for a man to say so I've. I appreciate the skin comment again. I think you and I are sort of on the same. You know it so funny is that you walk in and we have so much that I think you and I can relate and talk about and which the First thing you say when you walk in is Conan

I got a sunscreen for you, the first thing you said, and I realise that people look at me like on the kid from powder like visible man, and you can see my vain I'm I'm worried bigger. Yes, I'm worried about you diameter, yes, because I dont know if you saw recently, but several brands have recalled their product enticing. Yes, I swear to you two days ago and in one of the branches of brandy normally use when I jump on my by again as I was myself down with this shit and then they said, and am I am going to mention them in case there? You know supporting our cause here, I'll, take the money and and get the answer, but usually just at the hands of exactly. But you know if you getting cancer and money. Well, hey that's a good day but yeah. I hope myself down with this stuff, and I said that it will. It will kill me welcome the life on earth, I mean

in all of our fruits and vegetables are our ground and in cash at end you know, really everything is poison, and so how God you ve gotta this sorry. This is the way my wife talks is talk about how everything's killing us- and I say, everything's always been killing us we're in the process of dying anyway so enjoy, and then I take a giant swing of liquid, especially in those yourself down my answer. Slacken had their yeah, I'm sort of saying, hey come on get me. I M ready to go yeah check, please. I approach sunscreens the way. A professional golfer approaches, clubs. I have at least like twelve of them, like heavy, moved into attempted sunscreen yacht try as yet, but you didn't work really yeah b cause when I

have any flesh color on my face, any human skin. The tone people know something's wrong as I'm serious, so I got a kind has like this light came to it and I put it on, and people would say: oh you're kind, you're gonna get you to the hospital. Is your kidney and liver or fail? There is clearly a build up of toxins because I can see your skin a little bit it as a little bit of a? U ok. So now I ran away from that and it didn't work and also it gets all over your collar yeah. That's not good, and it really does have an unpleasant. It's an unpleasant color. It look like. I had dire yeah yeah. I am Edwards merrily to me. It just feels like you may have. Maybe

A spell the lumber coffee. I think, diarrhoea, it's a bit of a stretch. I mean, I don't know your diet, but as I am the diet, its if you took in your shirt tightly and have explosive diary, it's possible right up and did I did. I go too far to find out if you're telling the truth known as is right this. This is the problem with someone like you is that we're going to we're gonna go off on all these tensions, which are delightful, but I have some two things to say to you up front which is. I was very happy to be talking to you today because a massive fan of hacks but had a specific big thing that I wanted to say, which is that I think it's one of the better depictions of the creation of comedy that I've seen on a screen. That's so incredibly, exciting to hear that you feel that way, and we saw we, we saw the vulture article where you kind of,

said that and we all were so excited and passing the article around and she'd, and I are kind of freaking out, because when we love you so much and that's so nice, and I think that it's completely a credit Pieology and Jan? and our writers, because you know you are sort of, I think, with any project when you our people to tell their own story. It's much were to life a lot of stand up, comics, wherein the writers room, polity and Jan have been comics at various points in their life. I've seen. So I think it's really just a matter of with really any storytelling letting people tell around stories. It's just going to be much better. That way, I think nonsense, probably like the Larry Sanders show. Has there been something that to me he feels like so true to life and watching Larry Anders. I just tried to get sort of like a feel for

the writing sphere, although that's like a late night in the area that that was really helpful in the one bound to pick I always had with Larry Centre Show- and I pay I said this to Gary, so it's no secret is really one writer thrust wonders writers and they were always Jeremy ahead and jests air me very rarely sitting around and there was one or two and then rehearsals were always kind of this black days a coal affair where they were really worried about the sketch, like I know, you're shitting yourself a rehearsal, and you have summit you take so many writers to just come up with a little bit of stuff so that an raged me but other than that it was a very good depiction of emotional and emotionally of tone of what's happening at a show by its fascinating, that I assumed when I Ah, the show I thought,

ok, Hannah's gotta, be someone who just grew up determined to do somebody, and so I do little research By that I mean someone else did and handed me moment now. Mrs yesterday, I was thinking about this interview. Eggs really wanted it to be right, and so I did some research and found out that you came to comedy kind of way. Which is ridiculous to say you're, you're, very young, here, twenty five or twenty one, think you're sixteen years old, where eleven and three, like you, said, good skin. I more says here you were born for four hours ago: and comedy was not something that you were thinking about to fairly recently. Isn't that right, yeah in college, I am joined the improv team because there was a kid who I worked on. I was like a piano film said, and he recommended that I come try out and am I

started doing comedy in in college, and then I graduated in twenty seventeen and started doing open MIKE's Every night, as a young stand up and yeah I mean it's been like a sort of brief, I've been doing it for only a short amount of time, but I think I kind of came to it. Syria, Leslie upon graduating college. It sounds like you almost took a alright, I'm do they are so I'm going to educate myself. I am going to be old myself, I'm going to lift the weights and I'm going to know everything I need to know. So how did you do that training? Montage eighties may, after an analogy, lodgings gave marking the good dig. It came to ban bad Van Brandt. Job just about hunting, clown and face of a clown about being a boy. I won't do it it just gimme

and I don't want to do- a training montage where I say they are going to get ready and do it and then maybe it's a montage of me just playing I of the tiger over and over again standing listening to it and not doing any different shots, only whirring different clothes- and this is your training for and eating fatty food and then putting this city and again and again and again and then download at getting from Spotify and then downloading it and yes, training for knowing the beads of minarets omega. So Steve, Martin. Yes, that's all the good stuff new heart and really like a lot of now Brooks and Albert, Brooks and I have a last name breaks or I'm not interested, but now I ve been studying the combat. The Brooks Brothers, I'm told us yes, which was dead. End beige age, drew lots of crew, braided belts, hang you gotta find out yeah I mean,

I really just I really just you know I became obsessed with its. I was not a great student. I have severe attention deficit, disorder and characteristic of the Non Neuro typical is sort of not being able to focus on concentrate on do things there, aren't that you're not obsessed with the people word about when you were a kid, this business of having attention deficit order, yeah yeah, I I really I mean englishmen and history were interesting to me, but other than that I really was failing. Certainly in school, and so I I I went to and arts school as a kid and then there was a private school in and You know after the recession, why went to a public school where you know I couldn't take a class? called lamp where we were making lamps out of wine. But you know there was no poetry and right

what the hell you doing, prison they hadn't making licence. Why are you sure you weren't innovation? By the way the girls treated me, you you, you would have thought this system but on quota, is just not built for anyone who who can't just likes, the fall in line in that way, and that I- I mean at least for me, as a child made me feel like wrong. frankly stupid, I was in the lake learning impaired class and aware you know you, you go if you're not really figuring it out in those particular support, and so it's it's like. I think that contributes to why a person becomes a comedian in the first place or an artist, because there is that, like I have to to present make a case as to why I am value and hopefully strangers validating me. Will you know,

bring some relief from those those fears. I guess yeah. I was very ambitious, even as a kid I dont know why but I knew that I wanted to do something, so I really valued math. I thought because I can't do it. It must be the only path to success. and to this day, occasionally mice and so who's out right now, but she'll catch me using my fingers to figure out the tip. Oh my god willing using your fingers and I'm you know I'm. I am in embarrassing situations of sometimes they'll do lists of who is really smart, celebrity that I'll be out there. I went to a good colleague Jenna the words How did you know that? Oh he must be.

I'm using my finger, I agree that these three new year and in that I still screw over the waiter, but just because he wasn't a good way to damn that way. She'll eyes a different issue, but I didn't want to ask for crammed relate. I want the fire glaze on the nightmare at a restaurant. Where am I right about the crime? Relate aviator, not wrong. Ok, oh shit, David. Was that later, that's how I screamed at in office. I want to make the story pirate. I got him fired in about twenty minutes. This episode is brought to you by mail, as you can imagine. I work with very large staff. That's what happens when you get to my level on the business one them. My staff has been emailing me literally every day very soon,

I did try me he's got some big news to share. He says it sucks, He's gonna blow me away. I have not found out what this is about. Yet do you know what this about Sona, I have no idea why thought would have him on the pod cast to make his big announcement, and maybe we can share in his celebration, whatever it is, unsure, yeah, that's zombie, being please welcome a team cocoa software engineer, John Danny Danny this, is exciting, which you big news earth shattering news coming from the camp of team cocoa. Are you sitting down? I am sitting down. Ok, I'm ready! This is at a school blah, lad, honest man, I've insights about this. For a while, I am thrilled to announce that we are changing our marketing platform and now partnering with male ship weight. That's your new cider partnering may seem a little less excited than I am. I love

the name male China and I am a big fan of the company to didn't think. I honestly didn't think that was your announcement. I went to tell us something like you won the sweepstakes having a child, something like that. Those would be called to Bananas about Europe right I'm guessing that you have more to say about this male chip announcement. Oh you know, there's couple reasons why I'm excited primarily just the improvements in each year is that come with moving the male ship. First of all, you got deliver ability in the past week. Hey that some of our email going out to users was marked as spam. I do want to say how much, but you can imagine it was a decent amount. Yeah yeah, you know

No, I think it's unfair Danny that that the rap on you was that Europe stilted awkward speaker, because this is one of the most natural conversations I've ever had any way it does. It feel great is a software engineer to see your work and up and spam folders, but with male chimps, deliver ability. Yes can be nearly as might have been issuing more. Why the gospel Conan will end up in more in boxes, thats, exciting they were reach more people won't go

spam. You must be really excited company. I am, I am an egg star, I'm an artist and like any artist, be he Mikel Angelo no wrote an he likes to see his work displayed and preserved around the world, but I mean is it? Is it a helpful and efficient you know, system male chimp is. Is that something that I can depend on twenty four seven or you get so we depend on it. It's definitely efficient. They have all these automation set up. You can configure triggers in response to user events, to send out the males westward. On my end manually speaking, work for you. I mean it's clear to me Derek You have given us a lot of thought. It was spent he's working on this yeah anybody. we written down some of your thoughts that sort of their in private. Perhaps a little None of them are coming from the heart yeah. I can tell tell you very passionate, but it just

correct me: if I'm wrong, you love Melchior, because it's easier to use right, so I paying you'd and work less hard. I mean shouldn't you get less money now, because you're using male chimp shouldn't, I reimburse you less because you're putting less effort thanks to them wonderful male chimp? I think you you think of it. More is you're freaking me up to lend a hand and other things that were working on around deemed cook that Smart LAO Smart he's very, very good. This stand a guy, You know we should talk more you or better, yet alive. glass. Well, this is this. Is cool now hurry using male chimp? Don't tell me you're using it to send it. Our first news letter is: are we going you better? We are doesn't mean coming soon in the next few days. I'm very sorry it's you. I get a look at the analytics after we set it out, see the open rates improvement over the previous services we used. Aren't you getting

Hoddan bother now with your analytics, Yad, well Danica. I look forward to seeing you at the Christmas Party in two thousand twenty six but not until then you are again you're one of the Euro Stunning conversationalist the end, and I'm I'm well, I don't know- exists among male chimp and now I am too much so that I can say this. Try Melchior today at male chimp, dot com, Slash Conan! Do it did you try, medications and stuff, but you tried yeah, did, the Oh, do, after all was on very high dose of concern. When I was fifteen, that was thirty six milligrams and was the first time are. Maybe I was, I don't have a great concept or time I was very young artists programme for it,

yeah, I was very it put me in a very dark place as a man it just like. I was in my bed unable to move and then and then I went from ten milligrams of after all, to about like thirty five have forty by day and by the time I quit the staff. Here I am I was I was on it for maybe like six issue years and if it helps me get through the system, I felt that that period of my life is kind of loss in and in all of my memories I was nothing like I am now, but in my memories of my childhood, of which there are few. I I feel more like it was like me, and then a little break, and then I'm back kind of just because you know that the fact that it has on on a brain like mine and an after all, can be great for some people. But for me it

they just sort of dulled. The thing that now I know is, is I guess the best thing about me. It's interesting to me that you went off of it and then had this better access to your improv brain, but it but it it like you sad. I mean it created the sort of access to all of this. All of the frankly just emotions in general that I was not feeling because I was sort of numbed up. I mean I. I believe that until my my dying day. I will be frank trying to you're out how to deal with both of those sort of realms within my consciousness as yeah I'll do you have that sort of yeah there's no ending, there's no looking to a camera in life and saying whelp, I know to be a long time to realise that I heard a sort of an acting codes. once even not an actor but someone who is helping me Tell me what do you? What is it you

What do I do said? I just wanna be perfect at this meeting comedy I just wanna be perfect at performing. I wanna be perfect at being funny and she looked at me. She said there's only one moment of perfection that you have in your life and that's your death and at your death you become poorer. And then she tried to kill us through Ionia who barely six thousand. I know, but I thought oh that's awful and but she was just saying: you're never gonna get there. Ok, then it's why we're so nice to people when they pass away yeah, because the stories over and in retrospect and in an immense respect you say: well, you know that was the best version, of that kind, o Brien that there today, colluding all this shitty stuff, but that's that's it s!

the comedian that I think of as being perfect, feels this way, and that is like what so difficult, like, I think, of Robin Williams as being a perfect comedian, his access to sort of that free flowing thought. I think of you as as being of her, strict comedian, and if I may, I know this is difficult for you to hear, because I listened- you're broadcasting. I know you it's difficult fur, compliments and things like that, but I I watch you and I've watched you forever and I I see you the way that you know You may see your heroes and and perfect people in and maybe I'm talking to myself here to its like. If we it see ourselves the way that people who had my arrests, do he wouldn't see the failure so crazy. It's it. If I had an experience which was, I was at a fi salute Steve Martin, who I mean I've, Islam, a different generation than you.

oh, but I remembered when Steve Martin hit, and I was very interesting comments as a kid and so steep Martin heads, I want a siren nineteen, seventy seven, seventy eight somewhere around there, and so I would be fifteen years old when he heads I didn't know anybody could be that funny. It was seeing eye I grew up in a world of people, firing muskets and then someone in the corner detonated, Adam Boffin. I didn't know that a person could be that funny and it took my boy

breath away. So all these years later, I met some big prestigious salute to Steve Martin in a bunch of us her there and we all get up on stage and say these nice things about Steve Martin and they show a if I had made this wonderful montage where they took classic clips of buster, Keaton and Charlie Chaplin and intricate them with these classic moments from Steed Martin, and there was fantastic, was so beautifully done. They just did a beautiful job and after it's over, I just had a moment where accidently I was sort of standing next, Steve, Martin and the thing is over. And he just almost to no one said he. I didn't really belong in there with those other guys and he was saying that a false modesty. He was saying to him that didn't that wasn't right and I thought well, that's insane, because you're you're great moments fitting beautifully with

we need such an amazing physical comedian and verbal comedian and though his his best work fits in perfectly with the best work of a chaplain or a buster Keaton or any of the great comedy teams and Sir Thing king yeah. You fit you fit in their perfectly, but of course you can't see that it's not his job to see that in it you know, so people that get hung up on my work, be remembered. It will people care or how they feel Bout me is such a mammoth wasted time. The important thing is: are you making a lot of money, doing no money into real estate and there are you making sure that you shelters in attack from the shirt is the governmental fuck you

like someone, I'm fucked up your premier allay making them sort of any the less Pacific Yachting anyone listening. If you take away anything from this year, yeah you try comedy blah blah, get it into real estate, opaque, find it ocean front cause they're, not making any more of it and shelter the money in the UK people offices Switzerland? But you don't know Belgium? A pretty good thanks, Council last year, and I shuffle at around and I'm doing some unsavory stuck with it, but it's very lucrative. that's what I'd like you to take away from the rested instantly after the first was the obvious: all these police, cars or swarming around studios right now. Take me away, I saw something we haven't touched on is that you ass. You are very sensitive creative person and I understood and the whole arc, but were bearing the leader

little bit. I saw your stand upset on coal bare and your vert, your jokes, her great endured man. I can't believe you walked out in front of an audience that big at such a young age. I think the youngest comic to it to ever be on Colbert, show and you come out and you nailed it with gloomy away. Is you have this? This performance, peace, rare you're, so relating kids talking, seven. Sixteen you're all girls talking a bit in a bit she weighs about someone had a party, unlike in I rest, my art yeah. I know what you say is even higher than what would this be like in the nineteen thirties and you break out these I'm a fan of old, Jaime Voices and you have is you're such a good dialect commute and I thought your voices were really great. So is that the minutes be that that's like a hidden superpower that I haven't seen you access before yeah

I'm like I've actually been asked. If I was like making fun of that time period with the sort of that sat leg, it's it's more I have like a celebration of how wacky that rhythm is and how much I love that rhythm comedic Lee, even if at the time they didn't intend for it to be funny. Oh no, I totally think it's hilarious. I've always been fascinated with watching old movies and uneven the kid that Rapid Jimmy and they would walk into a room and the people, some other guys in IRAN in black and white, and it's all the thirties and paid at all. What I hear what you say, you know there's this there's this one. this guy rapid fire banter and people getting on. The phone is greatly five. I an end this, a firearm agreement here, Spain, golly like and in two

now. It sounds absurd as the way we speak now. What I was trying to members, however, we're talking now will be he absurd. Yes in a hundred years, because we're trapped like like ants in but in our own time oh yeah I'll of listening to. If you listen to me, politicians speak in the nineteen twenties and thirties thee. My profound, had just come along, so people who started there, political career in the eighteen nineties or nineteen hundred they had to project one giant hall of people and so there's a certain way. You speak when you, inter each hundreds, of people was fastened to me. Is it then the microphone comes along, but people dont suddenly change the way they speak. So there this air of about thirty years, we're all politicians, even though the goddamn Michael,

found three inches from their mouths are more like. Let me tell you all that is going to be our trick in every year. End Now we have our petitions, they can know how to use a microphone, but that took forever. I took forever. I think, there's gonna be new technology that comes along and people are gonna. Look at the way, we're talking. Oh, my god and say what terrific mass yeah yeah. I mean well if, if, if that eventual language, if it is comparable to the English we speak today, we are probably speaking holding but right now kind of what, if it's all like it spread like Malaysia. Wherever my stupid is idiotic, Christiania yeah, oh god, I'm pretty sure

me too, the boy I love it because yes sire funny. It's such a great. It's such a great movie, but but my god too much of it came true, favorite one of my favorite things about to get whenever they show shots of the city No one knows how to make her fixed anything anymore. So skyscrapers are being held up, the rope at just thought, I'd rope and it's absolutely a chilling depiction and has our infrastructure fails and in Washington. We can agree on whether to fix it, let me just the idea that that that skyscrapers turned to follow this path a joint rope. That'll do yeah so you must be pleasantly surprised by the explosive successive hacks and are you thinking? Ok? Does this lead you down to double

down more so on acting I mean I love act. The only reason I was able to rationalize my ability to attempt this job No experience is I just kind of was like it. Comedy and was doing comedy, I'm just going over there and I'm doing comedy. I've like broken down when the barriers of like acting stand up and you know any other sort of medium. I'm I've just literally so that I won't panic and gaunt how to spiral of? I shouldn't be here. I can't do this. Like this is a nightmare and a disaster they got the wrong guy. I I have had sort of go like it is simply all an expression of one's soul, and

you now, wherever that lands, and it's like the only thing I can tell myself to not very well. I think any time I can tell myself I've noticed there are many things I can't do if I have to be serious about it, but if I can they could comedic angle. Suddenly, I know how to sword fight form. I saw her. I mean if I, if I were, if there was a mirage, I'm sorry I was an emergency and I could go in and prefer my surgery, the low attitude, I think I'll get it like. Eighty percent right, the personal be blinded by video, get about what other get over it and I'll be long gone using one of my Swiss, our belgian accounts, but you know there's this thing where I've I've noticed that I'm not an actor meaning. I dont want to bear some part of my soul. I can't do that. I'm not meant to do that bites. So if someone asked me to have like an intense love scene,

somebody. I couldn't get a million years do that, but if it's for comedy, I can do it because there's does this tiny, grim like this really thin layer of that now, just for comedy yeah, and then I can have a total make out and was Ryan Reynolds in the rear, yeah and get multiple takes at my request and and say we need more rehearsing. We already shot at no might well, let's go again after hours come over to my best method, but suddenly I don't have to think about it. I'm not work about it. I'm like yeah, I'm gonna, put on it ass. Now, going to recreate a scene from the notebook and I'm gonna jump into the arms of rain Reynolds and make out with yes and he's going to fund it my ear as we do it, I don't know. I remember that part the most by

then be done. Like I ain't a sandwich, you like great that we gotta Ryan. That's I dont know what that is. I don't know what that is, but if I had to play an emotionally. If I do that in any kind of emotionally honest way, I couldn't I could no more flight of the moon. You know, I think be that the armor thank you know its eye, I feel the same way when I did my four in in acts when I did my first like seeing I'm making out with the young gentlemen- and I'm you know in my Braun underwear, which is something that I still have not allowed myself to really think about- because I am- I am constantly like cover every part of my as much as my body is possible in my own life right and, of course, there is nothing that in a fully consented to doing this scene- and I was made comfortable by by everyone on answer, but you know that seen the nature that seen as we are hooking up, he

oh and then I'm sort of running around the room tearing through boxes it's. The tape is loud. I'm throwing shit all over the place like there are tons of lines that we in the original that made some some made some didn't but the the angle. Was it's not going right there? is a comedic spin on the whole thing, so it was working towards thing, Funny Encyclopedia adds funny. I can of course, I'll do this. It's free, for a bit. Eventually, it's like the same: its protection, yeah, its protection, being a fool from actually being a fool which is weird because we are fools Witherspoon many times TAT are rap.

Sign. No, I'm looking to wrap the per Goran orally, like it says, rap per goarly that owes refugees deciding here means rap. When you want, I will not be thrown under this bus. You guys speak of free. Will I less and my things down one's got a pizza delivery of the door like I've heard enough. I want to have my cheeks, and this is- and I do as into this pod- cast the most serious episode tenuous nigh I admit I get super strength from seeing this young generation of really funny accomplished comedians coming along and comic actors and performers and right There is. I always sought humming gonna, feel when I get older and there's this new crop and and the old man and I have to say it's gonna delightful, every p s cause. I have seen you prefer arm of senior Senor Joe and love it and talking to and reading

about you very impressed where how seriously you take it and how much of yourself you're bringing to it now so, like the ear opening up to people and saying yeah right now. You're you're, going through this really nice moment that I think is just gonna, keep unfolding for you, but you're being open about the genius of some of your earlier life and some of the struggles that you ve had, and I think it's gonna be really helpful to a lot of people. One of my favorite episodes. Assertive of this by gas is the one that you did with Chad and I've got arrive down. It felt like some thing that I, as like a young comic needed to hear that I know for a fact that it it. It helped me in and no. No, I I I just like we, I'm at change is its here, the world. Was ending like what is the fucking. Why are we gonna just? Why hide any of? Why not

just tell the truth like we are propelling so rapidly folks towards the big day, and that is deaf, and so like why not just share your experience in your truth. I have often thought: if things get really serious. What am I doing, I'm being so silly and so stupid and voting my life to that, and then I think they are not mutually exclusive like There are so many problems in the world, but but if this is what we can contribute then will contribute this. You know I could probably donate to some causes that would help fight global warming. But again I don't see the tax benefit.

Well, your son screen is reef safe, and I know that some guys I really do have a pizza. So let's get this guy, I can smell your over zoom. That's the crazy thing I wish we could just see like steam, rising up just ass, you on and before we rapid out by. I haven't mentioned the whole time, but your mom Newman, it's hard for me to believe that you didn't was her part of your life for your watching her stuff on CERN alive, watching her work and thinking. That's my mom for will you always detached from it that it always feel like it's from another world? Another era? It does feel like a different person and it does feel like it's from a different era, and I I am able to appreciate it. I mean there's no part like there's no part of me that is like walking into the kitchen the morning like she's here.

Stir struck wow their sheer. You knows it super like normal. As I'm sure you know my kids or of that data sent go by the little autograph I sign at every day they were born there. He may store. I get good luck, making money out of that. No there's a that's! Also refreshing. When you're, my kids have had lived contempt for. may, you got into bed nobody, nobody eyes, not consent, but like Bay, there we had some rather fresh air for you. I'm sure we never sit around and talk about my work if anyone else brings it up, they roll their eyes and there, like really I mean with age, our holiday or kids like eyes earlier met late forties heads high school had summoned his nine my daughter, seventeen of my sons. Fifteen. With with time That is also something that is in. I don't I don't know how to say this. I dont need that from

now. Of course not. You know, I guess the nice thing is time. We yeah we enjoy watching all kinds of comedy and the idea that we would ever sit around watch. Anything I did is absurd and have encouraged it. Doesn't it stick bites but yeah I dont need that from them. It doesn't I like that. That's not part of our life yeah? I admire my mom so much more for who she is like Russia as a mother and a person right while also admiring her as as a performer, but you know you, I think I speak especially with it with age. Have just as you become more of a human being. You understand how difficult it is to walk the earth. obviously in varying degrees, depending on who you are, but you know just that profits, our respect and understanding for,

Really. Anyone, but especially in out my mom as time has gone on, has been profound and lake with time I mean I I can tell you, I mean it almost a sure fire thing that with time with time, yeah respect, respect, understanding and all that comes ok I'll, give it more time. But if my kids are familiar with my work by the time you in your thirties, I'm going to sue them absolutely and that will be in it. single snazzy, groundbreaking maybe they'll be in this room, o Brien but she's, involving at the whole time yeah. They mirage. Try one this once from the nineties. Courthouse

I. I was really happy that you came into do the pied cast because you're you're, the kind of person that makes me feel very good about where we're headed community artistically and you're really good person, and that the cross. So thank you so much for coming in and I get streak read now saying that you're my friend, my God, which I dont get awash. So so thank you so much and yeah and come on back some time, as I just loved talking to you about comedy your process and you're just right in the middle of it all and and please tell everyone at your show, how much we all love. It is only right and it's truthful, and I can't wait to see where it goes Thank you. I will pass along the message you earned. Am I really appreciate it? us into the pot. Carry he had got that.

what he and she won't listen to my pica. Oh, she does raise the spiralling hygiene managed Lapierre she's, not there ever gene We love you mean said, differ there's something out there and Jean out there are someone wearing jeans. How do I make early? I need I fail while we're a bill Thank you. So much greater Conan doesn't have his earphones omber, we're gonna, surprise him with a visit from Sonia. He doesn't know he's gonna join us. I second also does this boys do anything for you, hey boss, Ok, nice job. I really like that. I know what it s like the hate. We have a little surprise for you, come in right now,

a low cost. You wear them babies at their downstairs, with my dad and he's by himself with them. This is great sorrow you. You have not been on the pod cast since you gave birth to to human being, Really I mean that long. Maybe it's only really Sikhs and you were on the last episode, something we recorded, but it still so nice to network amazing. You don't just takes the drama that guy. Let me let me explain to the listener that, for as we have not seen sown in eight weeks or so thing on the podcast. We have and seeing you because you gave birth the two human beings and your mom now, but because we sometimes shuffle things out of order.

But probably heard you on the last week gear You re matter yonder, Michael Canton episode, yeah, so oh, basically, people think you're terrible mob guy line. The impression that there is you gave birth and then an hour later started TAT line, commercials for fracture and Casper masterpieces or whoever Kentucky Fried Chicken. Now that don't adds anymore. I'm. How are you I'm Guy MRI, I'm ok, I don't sleep might stay. I think you know that's. Why don't you see because there's babies I ll have to feed them. We have to assess all handled by. Others is remember no, no! No! No! Now how many yards are currently at the householder acts there that that's the problem is, there's no yeah, there's a dead it at one time. Ok use! I'm sorry were in America. Now

How bout here your father, yes and then I M quasi yeah yeah is- is a grandmother is so my. I love them and I need them, but they never had a conversation with me about it. They just started showing like the day after we got back from the hospital they just but the main I told your mother didn't even use the door. She walked through the wall and there's a hole in the wall in the shape of your mom. You just walked right through the wall and grabbed both babies isn't natural gas. You acted like the Kool aid man, that's vagrant babies, I dont see them and they now at night, tax periods comes there that night and then they leave an intact, and I take care of well, not the night. you take care of the evening merrily you're getting a ton of help. We ass, we do sleep during the day. Maybe no I mean I do not really know burgesses, I can't live.

Just turn it off. I have their their name like need me in aid to hold them ghonim, you're nuts, something very has included near there, really, I don't need me and I have to hold them. I just said Are you sure they're gonna be fine there and just like Julie in you know, her gray, I like them alive. I mean I love them. What are their names? I agree entirely making. Surely I knew that I just want what p I want people to think I'm a monster. I did know that, but I wanted the listening public to know that it's my key and Charlie we do. Do they have armenian middle names? They do They went to the mental names. Charlie's is required in my going toenail creek killed. Creek could Gregory, but its creek, cod Creek or yeah, just for the record is nothing like Gregory yeah I love how in armenia- and you can say which is middle name. Grapes

a deal sombre. You know it's like miss him. How is that, like TIM? What's his name, Rob strand breed dice. those Jean Valjean Billy? Do I I don't think you do. I should go. I need to go further. By going on out there s downturn is growing Mamma. I know I'm having I just to get out of this. I know I suspect that people are faking having babies just to get away from me because I keep hearing so you had these babies, but I never see any sign of them. and then I see pictures of view online vacation hotspots around the world Yesterday you started, we were on the phone, you started doing a bit that was annoying and I was like: what's that, I'm pregnant again remember I did yes. Yes, I mean I just get pregnant. Whenever you annoy me well diversion some kind, a record? Listen, I'm I'm here you're not getting any sleep at night, but let me tell you this babies,

until three months. They don't do much. You know but then, when three months it's gonna start to lock eyes with you. Yes, my oh, my kids at three, months recognized me they're, like oh shit, that's Conan, O Brien, wait. I recognized you as their father. They recognized you is like a public figure. It like a good humour from the nineties. They bail, We totally lacking icy yeah there, like oh shit, you know the early stuff was so good, the kids. It turns out we're very familiar with my career so long before they knew me as a father. They knew me is a guy who's on late night M, yes indicated recently honour CNBC nearly two. thousands, so right now, you're data. Your father made my dad they're dead there. When you call him what what's the armenian way to say, Father Bubba so you'd say he's your babo he's they're dead, we call a bottle. Then, if you dont say Bob offer a baby thought

models in my family, whereby we sell to your yeah. Sometimes when I really hit the bottle, it goes back baby. So why don't you go blah blah? Does what? What are you assume that everyone said that that's just you? I guess we mean that's what babies call a bottle. Baby Lhasa was that people do that. That was gonna like data Mama, now. I know I'm sorry to have offended you're much. we're very verbal. They would say liquids plea that was it that was it three weeks, liquids ways for nourishment it's on. My daughter said it three weeks have and she wore a monocle. So the question is: you are, of course a big part of the pod cast the trio. If you will, the super friends team of Conan Man Sauna, question: is you ve now entered this? new phase of your life. What if you ve lost it when you know haven't any more. What if you don't want, it is more likely I'll play.

he's who wouldn't want to be on this pod casts a rocket ship defame, but when you don't have it any more would have all of your you like. I have a funny anecdote, easier pretty. I know not about, I mean there's gonna, be a lot less like you know, tried to sneak in articles two Disneyland stories which I hope. So I was thinking about that today that I can't go to Disneyland high anymore, because if I go to design- and I obviously I'll take the kids- and I can't be high with the kid so I don't know when I can be high Disneyland again when sauna goes to Disney Land hi, it's funny when sooner the mom goes to Disneyland hi, it's a crime, I know so yeah. I don't know if there's anything any fun stories like bad in, but you know what did I ever really have it? I mean I care really do improv, you guys are the final and you know what that I was along for the ride. Do it, you know, I mean it is what it is. It's cool was one make it clear that if

You ve lost your fast bought all you're. You're done. You know yeah its sister, I'm sorry. They think too many people in America make exceptions. I just mixed. make sure that you haven't lost her. This area brightening like you're, saying to a woman who just gave birth, like you better, still be good or us, your firewall she's on maternity leave yeah. Why am I to infringe children are sleeping downstairs with their barber? Bread Baba's bottle sees that's what I thought, such a stupid conversation Bubba Data bottle what that work. what kind of exchanges that I'm pretty here. I can threaten to fire Sonia while she off on maternity leave, then I, I don't think, there's any legal recourse that she would have now listen. I have not consulted a lawyer and I have not looked into this at all, but I am quite certain sooner than that. I can threaten you right now,

no, I didn't think about you firing me. I was just like what, if I don't, have it and we're but you're like you'd, ok, so I can get fired let's get to more profitable area rather than this negativity. Let's talk about the beauty of the fact that you now have these two baby boys yeah, and I want to talk about something sewn on which, as you sent me a picture the other day you, dress them like old men. You dress with suspenders and they have come over, they have ridiculous comb overshot their baby. They have lake whatever. As I got echo receding here, they will. They seriously look like ninety five year old man to ninety five. Zero men and their expressions are very sour. Legged are unhappy. They can't hear the television, it's not a receding airlines and advancing airline. I'm sure you hope that makes more sense. That makes a lot more sense. They do, like all men. I like dressing them up in suspenders. I like it when I addressed but I come their hair. I go. I go you to my little gentleman.

I'd like to address them up. Like they're, my dolls, there, my living bringing dolls, and I can answer that rising Charlotte eyes. If I sent you to Little fake moustaches old man moustaches. Would you put them on the babies guy word, but here s. Why do you want to do that? If I send you to real old man, mustache network, you put them on the babies, Absolutely I think they can grow. Moustaches really Harry, like their at bath, are very harry. Who really know they aren't rabies don't have Harry backs. My boys have Harry back, is in back off putting yeah it's off putting it. You could probably com a hair from their backs up and over the top of their head. Yes, and no have more hair like a hare hoodie. Do they really that Harry yeah there's things about them that, unlike oh, it's is

nor have I got my gear six. Six. Six on, therefore, has this happened when I was I Formalin Mikey, as these giant I like Heaven is days their eyes and then he like, when, when you I've, when he was first born here, widen his eyes like he was like, like seeing no figure you possessed merit it honestly. Freaked me out, like I was really nervous about it. I was there is something wrong with him, but I think that's just babies are doing stuff like that. Never heard of that. Never her! Now that you are able to maybe you're you're babies are very Harry and their eyes expand to twice the. There are three three times the size of normalize. Yes, yes, they do. Ok, they basically can detect motion through sooner. Is that what you're saying do they pay for a cave say to his curious summary. Bat. Like are you saying my children are dying,

No, I said bat like what is already not an inch now they're, not like bats, their cute little little gentleman there a little too little gentleman and I'm gonna buy them. Tweed jackets and Corduroy asked them up like college professor yeah or mad goarly doesn't entered into wonder Kate. Let's get a carpenter to build them, tiny little arts and crafts houses in Pasadena Yak into any new doomed down down down down down at alone. I'm doing right now, I'm so Joe, I'm so happy to see you. It is it's very nice to see you. I am really happy to see that you are really miss you. I mean I saw you guys all the time in an end in itself, I did I'm. I missed you guys, and you know I have formal. I feel like you guys, are having a lot of fun without my god we're having a lot of fun. Hey, you know, Camp David helpings been filling in for you and we after we do

record, I take him to eat your former favorite meal, which was a sugar fish, sushi yeah, and I take him there and David happy and I have such a blast and were laughing and were eating your favorite sushi and you're. Not there It's all! I don't forget your also sending me photos of the two of you. How did we? My allaying, I took obvious photos of David happen: laughing eating your favorite meal me laughing maniacal, IE and said than to you? Yet? Why would I do that? Why do you do the? How right, right to harass you and re criteria? Yes, I've? I forgave all evil walk so now. I know that you have children to look after making and Charlie, but we really miss you. We love you and were so happy for you and I can't wait to see you.

back here in the studio when you're ready, ok, thank you come in, I missed my lawyer. My lawyer wrote that form I knew it. Conan o Brien needs a friend with Conan O Brien Zone AM of Cecial and MAC Goarly produced by me. The mat goarly executive, produced by Adam Sacks Joanna Solitaire off and Jeff Ross at team, cocoa and colony Anderson at your Wolf theme song by the White Stripes incidental music, by Jimmy the Vienna taken away, Jimmy our supervising producers and layer and our associate talent, producers, Jennifer samples engineering by will beckon talent booking by Polish Avis, junior Battista and brick com. You can read and review the show and apple pod casts, and you might find your review read on a future episode. Gotta question for Conan call the team cocoa Hotline at three two three four five one, two eight to one and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode and if you haven't already, please subscribed Conan o Brien needs a friend on have applied, casts stature or wherever fine bog casts are down

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