One of the secrets of doing the pie. Gases luring Hedda, effortlessly Phil time with foolishness. De calories babbling, like a chimpanzee, you know doesn't do that state farm. That's right date farm the people state farm. They tell us. Like it is some way laughing real. I wasn't sure you're going well and paper says state Farm, so you should have been looking its troops Farmers know Gibraltar. Apple and Bilbil Babble, they get right to the facts. You know so maybe they wouldn't make the best pod casters, but I'll tell you this. They make incredible insurance agents sustained farm. I think about it. You want the real deal like a good neighbour state Farmers. There.

There's something I can speak about anxiety and stress those Issues that I've dealt with my whole life, which increased when Cinema Sesson came into my life. Oh ok, we're sorry for your hurting, her mental health, whereas we are blaming me for while we don't make things easier, you constantly I want me belittle- may do below me at work. I very yes but anyway. So that's my point. We all have anxiety. We all have stress you know the world is that it's a fast pace place. It can sometimes feel impossible just to disconnect chill out. You know he got this election year, the phones always ringing people are upset their angry. It's a lot, so luckily better help online counselling. It's there for you, and is also there. For me, you know

sonnino, sometimes when you and I are not getting along, I might go into my office and shut the door and call better help. Ok, yet these are so this is actually seriously a great idea. Better help offers licence professional councillors were specialise in issues like anxiety, stress that can adversely affect your mental health and wellbeing. Plus better help couldn't be more. Can being in its available in desktop mobile web Android, and I always apps wife to do his fill out a questionnaire. Helped them assess your needs and get matched with a councillor. That you'll really love then get help at your own time and at your own pace you are in control with better help which really convenient you can now even schedules secure video or phone sessions as well as chat and text with your therapist Oh I don't know, I just think anyone could you oh yeah. I want people hurting out there. This is a good idea. Sessile easy up. Our listeners get Ten percent off your first month with the discount code Conan, because nothing so

depression in his heart. He might come now Astro. So when I get started today, gonna better help dot com, Slash Conan, that's better help dot com slash Conan seriously. If you're hurting it's cool idea dancing I feel oddly comforted about being common of bribes friend. I welcome the fence and what was that sooner? I hit my tooth when I drink my water. My tooth is hurting respect to do the intro

I'm sorry to the whole show, and I heard no sooner was was saying like this shit again and then I said what I am trying to do in intro and you hit your tooth went away. I hate that were recording this. I aggressively drink my water and hit my tooth with the glass by then I put it down and then it kept hurting, and so I made my noise you went was played again here. You hear that. Did you guys you're the man? Did you hear that yeah? That's a real sir yeah that sounded to me. I'm glad you hurt yourself rather than me for a second thing, You weren't overjoyed to speak with me. You know that I myself, I'm being really honest when you When I heard, as I was just about to say, hi and welcome to go in the brain needs a friend, then I heard that you would hurt yourself rather than you were just filled with joy to speak with me.

I was glad you hurt yourself on, is not really being honest. Ok good! As as long as you're being honest it, it's totally fine, ok cool! I just I may have chipped my tooth, but at least I'm not board talking to you, but may wonder what the show is like off the MIKE. This is it. This is exactly what it's like. Well, you can use. This are not Coralie, but I think it's interesting now. You don't have to wait and wait. Maybe greatness, is, do it it's fun called stupid. Maybe your stupid, That's funny really good does really good wine. This is so down and professional comedian are you yeah, and that was a professional. Maybe you are, if say, welcome to Conan O Brien needs. Louis surprise, you know, haven't a good destruction along me in my city, Squaw snakes breaks method, getting us back on track. All I was trying to, it would say hello and welcome to contravene needs. A friend which is the easiest part of the show.

And I heard soda, make a noise that got us bickering and then Goarly had to come in and save the day. But I do welcome you to our programme. It's amazing that, even though, We are in the midst of a global pandemic, which should be giving us massive amounts of prospect. If I'm what's valuable in life bed that nothing's changed now we're on our separate homes everyone's like reassessing who they are as people still Victor economic idiots humans. We always disappoint even a pen can't change us a little normalcy good, though its comforting in it's weird way it is where is, but it is I'm getting to know no matter what happens, I really do think if there was like some kind of a popular and then we were all wandering around a smouldering city escape and the three of us found each other and our clothes were shroud

and we were smouldering- I think we would each other quickly start to make a plan on how to find water and then start bickering, then soda would pick up like a small, dead rat and saying maybe I could eat this, and I would not get out of her hand to tease her and then goarly would start to go after me. I go after goarly for finding oh yeah. I would build a shelter, sauna would look for food and you would urinate all over our camp. I can't urinate it will. I need. I trust me, that's the only yet stopping me is that you know what I'd be able to command that much here and at a given time. It's not what I want to do that cause. Yes, really want to urinate I'll ervic camp that you guys built no sooner.

But go out if we were wandering around and popular pick landscape. I do believe goarly. You would start to build a house and at a shelter- and you start by wanting to build a simple lean to, but very quickly it would become a craftsman style. Nineteen eleven, you know beautiful architectural, wonder, and then you'd like find old banjos that you would hang on the wall and thrown out. You would say I'll, go find food, but then you'd be missed for a long time. You come back without food, but you have found a d dear friend, a dvd agree. I dont dvd of friends or high school musical and you'd, be like quickly I found also noticed that a future on this barrier lie. It has a somewhat stimulating effect, explained what the hell Gorlias gonna build. Some architectural marvel. There was a bit in there. You didn't shit on him at all really love me getting food and I come back with a dvd and berries that might get you hi.

Just watch the dvd, but you to stare at the deviant you stared at her view stared at the dvd, or they went off what there There is now there was no machine, you stared at it and when wow share, there's really kill it you're just staring at a charge dvd, because you have perfect access to your memory of every episode, so you can do we plan and now you're trying to make it tell me I really doing goarly Surely you know a thing to say something. I love this danger make that no one saw coming of you. Shifting to my side. It is. This is weird. It is like that gun that you bite into and there's that flavour juice, that's inside and it burst salary your mouth, that's what just happened to me, You came on my side and started shooting on sooner and it was electric. I ironing know I don't know indeed we agree if Gorlias Bill

the shelter and I'm getting the food. What are you doing? In my question, I have found some people that are slightly worse off than we are and I mocking them their use, mine, berries that might get me higher way: more user friendly people that are slightly down the chain from us. Maybe there even people, maybe they're, just like mutated squirrels and I'm laughing at them, but the mutated mousses laughing. So I'm I'm happy you'd be the least useful person in an apocalypse. You know what I dont disagree. I often, about the fact tat I had been born in any other time. If I existed in the fifteen hundred nine hundred seventeen if I'd had been killed immediately. Yeah you'd be turned to food for multiple reasons. You ve got a lot to eat because your oh and just to turn you off. I think YAP people would get sick of your bits. Real quick, I always dear me being in Ireland, unlike fourteen hundreds, thirteen hundred spa,

and everyone around me is building stone walls and two and trying to make shelter and sitting on one of the stone walls, making wise ass comments and one guy just comes up with a giant stone and Pittsburgh that plays out hundreds of times thousands of times throughout history, like donors that you or me it's sad. Both of us get her back. Its were back in. Comfortable behind much better much much better. It was just a moment. It was that brief moment when Russia was our ally from no nineteen, forty one to forty five before the cold war. There was just a brief moment there, and that was what it felt like, because you are stolen, No, no, no wait, wait! Wait when an iota humbly, I am Eisenhower and you are strong yeah. Now I have his phone now I am. I know you have his phone,

You are Marilyn, Monroe and yeah. You know I'll take it to take a look at all ends up so well, for you, I'm really confused about how Maryland fixing of any too low iron. How I'm going with these. We were in the fifties and he made himself- and I said no, your, moreover Marilyn Monroe, I'm gonna, say between forget it, I'm gonna, let it go because the idea of you fucking Arthur Miller too This is crazy. Now growing, flapping or another get up. We ve got episode to do come on now, there's no episode. After this we just went from. A very innocent beginning to Goarly passionately, making love to famed playwright Arthur Miller brilliant man in their home in Roxbury Connecticut. Am I

Breast like knowing well you're, not wearing anything Arthur Miller, had that weird fetish where he likes. You have sex with women who weren't wearing clothes. Ok, we got a great show. This is the perfect and ending and beginning to a great shout, probably better ending. But now I have a great show today. I dont want to stall. My guest today is in any award winning actor, who starred SAM alone for eleven seasons I'm cheers. You also know him from curb your enthusiasm and be hit NBC serious, a good place, I'm thrilled. He is just an absolute delight, I want a great gentlemen had danced and welcome

Dad. I apologise because of the corona virus, which I think is my fault. We are forced to do this podcast from remote locations, and I really hate doing this with you, because I'm issue, as you know, I'm a huge fan of yours and really look forward to being in the same room. So I'm sorry, just by looking at you right now, listening to you, I have to take the oddly out and save overwhelmingly comforted by seeing you many consider me an almost Christ, like figure and am glad that you seem to agree, that assessment YO, hey. I marry you look at that. I love that this is so fantastic.

I so. Unlike such a geek, I'm like look, it's marries deep virgin. That's really cool yeah sure delivering me a rice cake with on in butter and honey, because I got so stressed out setting this thing up right. Just now that I needed protein and I needed a quick okay. This is what I want to talk about. I sat silently like a creep. I didn't announced myself and I listened for fifteen minutes what he and minutes. Aha marry again. How are you are there? She goes again wow, which I had someone that loved and cared for me well anyway. Maybe the next night tat sugar rice cake,

and your Ahmed and honey I'm going to speak because I have something to say they should take about forty five minutes. I was listening to you. While my team led you, through the complicated set up of doing the zoom, plus all the audio stuff involved in doing this podcast and you were so patient and kind to everybody you didn't know that I was listening at an the whole time. I thought this is really studying you have this incredibly genteel way about you and people I might team were apologizing for how much you had to do when you kept saying? No. No please please do not apologise. Do not apologise. We should play some of that, because response hilarious? How all of us I mean literally it's like where it's like we're monkeys, trying to land Aspasia,

That's how I feel I feel completely, but listening to you and I feel less bad myself cuz. This is what they lead me through every time and I'm always saying things like weight hit. The apple is that next to the weight, where is the Quicktime where's, the spacebar? And so I'm comforted that you had as much trouble as I have and some, but that whole thing about me being kind gentlemen, something it's like. I'm trying to land is seven forty, seven in somebody's talking me through it. You don't get snappy with The people are a saving your life. So that's right. You D. Think agenda was not even anywhere near my brain, so now you know it's funny is that the quality of my zoom is such that Now you are in a serial glow. Yes, I am now. I don't know a few points Bree over the land. But I really do feel right now, like I'm falling in love with you, this weird dream: it's crazy.

I so I'm I have late stage glaucoma. So maybe that's it. The door today's filter yeah. No I swear to God, you can ask your team, I dont know. Why are what because we tried claiming it off with Maya my shirt. I think he used your shirt and some ham gravy to call and something that I have You know what there is there is like all members still am, I sure maybe that's the problem. Well, I wouldn't worry about it. You look absolutely beautiful and IRAN. Me up. I saw an interview once on Larry King live where Larry had regular lighting and he's sitting, maybe five inches away from Rocco Welsh, who had brought her own lighting contraption, and it was fastened

They were inches apart, they would cut Larry and then they and he'd say something about how what was it like that we first broke out in nineteen sixty two, it must have been a thing and then they cut rather how Welsh and she was in another dimension- she's from each other, but workshops see let's make he had. She was talking from Heaven. It was absolutely fantastic thanks for doing this by a joy to talk to you yeah me too seriously. It's really nice to see you and I'm assuming your well and loved ones. Then all about yeah, everyone's everyone's fine, we're all lucky, there is less at long last that we get here just tonker down, and so I think about that. Every day I can't possibly complain. I was still do an and treat people around me with

cook great bitterness. What I'm thinking about is. I do know that you have some natural anxiety and best of times. Are you a little bit of a hyper? a very conscious and aware of my body? Thank you very much. That's different thing than I began driven. Yes, yes, it is lucky. I say you, don't you don't like the term hypochondriac you liked to say I'm a very aware of my body and hyper aware of my body. What is it called when, because I'm a hyper aware of other people's bodies and I've been told it? That's not a good It can lead to not good things, but yes, yes, that, yes, I went up to I've been taught you several times and I did a week in prison. It is this. Do you think hoping during this time of quarantine and pandemic. Is your awareness of your instrument near bodies at helping you sort of? I something I think I

I was not a smart hypochondriac. Now I feel like eating so much better. I am not drinking because I doubt which was not a problem but- I'm doing everything I can to remain healthy, but the big thing is, I think I went really fast and life trying to do everything and hey I'm seventy two. I can still do everything and all that I I think this little breath we're all taking, and I talk. I know everything we say we have to clarify that we're not ignorant of the amount of massive amount of suffering them mass amount of indebtedness. We had to those people, let her out the world taking care of us all that true, but in my little bubble, mariner eating, really well exercising and- and just taking that moment to be together in a real way and deeper than I think

I thought you know I saw him rapidly, but I think that I used to think I'm. Mr light met. Madly present in love with Mary and true that was but I also notice. Oh, I used to like half listen and then figure out what she was saying and then decide what I was going to say and then interrupter, because I I'm going fast, I'm going faster right all of a sudden everything has slowed down and this theirs. How many little silver linings in our relationship- one. Thing and let this go, but at seventy two and Mary sixty seven. I think we might have gone really fast until the end and taking this moment almost feels like a little gift, I notes surrounded by suffering, but it's a little gift. What's the silver lining I keep saying there

there are silver linings and this time I love myself that every night I have dinner with my wife and two kids, and it was. I guess that came out of all this- is usually I'm rushing around so much in between the show and the Pied Caston different things that I have said it. I would do I dont often make for dinner, and now we all have dinner together and I like it, my children want me gone. At least I'm happy and you did, that pays were twenty thirty years, whatever it's been yeah. That's nonstop, yeah, it's it's! You know we, we have obviously very very different careers and and what you have undertaken.

You have phases where you're working on different projects and there are different areas of TED Dancin, and I think for me, there's just been when you start in the talk show comedy world and you get into it. It literally is just trying to keep a brush fire going. Your fear is, this thing is let its on fire. I've gotta, keep finding more kindling and keep it going and if it ever goes out I'll perish. So I was thinking about this. Before we got on the line today that I first became aware of you when I saw the onion field, and I love that movie I was probably in early teens. Something nice. I saw the onion field and I said who is that guy? That is great, Then I saw body heat and loved your character, and this is all pre cheers. I think body he was before cheer

Bosnia. So then I remember thinking I really like this guy and then you got cheers and of course, there's that whole explosion for you of that could have been enough. That was that's more than enough for any. After he had not a means, is that SAM alone and to be so I conic, and then you have shaped shifted about seven other times since then. In a way, that I find hard to compare with I? I can't find other examples of people that have found a single accidents found so many different ways to contribute and to find ways to resonate it, but each time completely reinventing himself ass, an you credit, some of that to Larry David, especially at you're. Getting you more and more into the comedy round. True true, I think I think there's a point where I felt that

stay too long, a the half hour Comedy party and other people were funnier. I was boring myself. I was for myself. I was predictable and all about and I had a show, cancel that I was in which Europe focuses you very quickly, and I thought I had said, and I called Jeffrey Katzenberg who had worked together so times. It said I do not have to pay me. I don't care what it is or how big is? Can you start putting me in to any kind of movie, and I think that led to a small part in saving private Ryan, and so I was gonna- be the Newt TED starting overrun. Film kind of thing and then along came Larry, show which is kind of funny acres Erin. I sat in an attic than Marthas Vineyard looking at work, I think a rough caught up the first of the pilot boat curb and several people fell asleep. When I married

well, I will put throw Mary under the bus, but I am glad that I was going to buy this sucks. He's so that any so sweet and I wanted to be a friend, and so we did the funny thing at the end of a wonderful and if you ever need, as the play ourselves would, of course were there for you in a shot and it turned out to be funny. I hate singing the praises and public back you. Don't really really turned half hour on its year and to be part of that reinvigorated my kind of delight and funny. So it's interesting me because I have heard you say that you do not concern. Yourself, someone Who are you used to not consider yourself a comedic person or someone with

like an inner comedic ear, which I find kind of hard to believe. Unless you have a different standard than the rest of us, I am full of false humanity by the way, so you gonna yes, shocked me out back then either I thank you. I didn't notice like we're, whose I think I just take your wonderful, that's my assistant sown and she's a great laffer, and she has a great laugh but just keep in mind. She also was probably high now come on in my view, are greatly not everyone. I see your eyes, but let me take you are the Jimmy Boroughs. This show Jimmy Boroughs, who was one of the creators of chairs and directed latterly everything now the man and have our work using during rehearsals. He would laugh and it was very good anxiously laughing to let the cast. No. This is a place where

you're gonna need to pause, because it's funny so is a very conscious lapse up your wonderful cause, you're laughing, and others are nothing at all. We said something funny, and maybe we pause, you're right at. Thank you so much. That's a massive massive cop. Also, I will say it I will say tat. You know I like to kid with sooner and I was Eighty per cent serious. When I said she she may be high. She also is not. She laughed. For real She laughed when some really funny and she doesn't laugh. If it's not funny I know that through bitter experience we totally fucked your up, she's gonna be incapable of doing anything right now. I said the F word and I saw everyone away. Is I mean we disbelieved me or well? I just means this can't areas that we have a huge mormon following an

now. What is happening is that I apologise to my brother was the funny it's itself that you mention that, because a year in years and years ago in another lifetime, when I was a writer on the simpsons, we had to go in and pitch ideas to James up Jim Jim Brooks James abroad. I remembered pitching to him a couple of story, ideas and he liked them and he was laughing and I thought wait a minute. I know this laugh. It was kind of a guy. Yes, yes, yes, yes and I thought wait a minute- this laugh is, in my view, a this lapses in my bone marrow and then I was talking to someone said. I know that left me said. Of course you do. You can hear it on the classic Mary Tyler, more sure he was off stage and sometimes his laugh would punch through cause. It's so distinctive, and I thought I am as a kid watching the maritime we're

show listening to this man laugh and then without realizing it hearing the same, laugh again when an pitching the Simpsons Jaso it was a kind of an old and moment. So you say as you will let let's get to the bottom of this. Yes, you have false humility, obviously have. I think you Carter, you ve called it a mechanism or almost an inner sense of what the timing is for lower comedy. I hereby here's what I'm with really funny good writing. I can be really funny and good if the writings not there. Can. I know this is like throwing writers under the bus, but there are some comedic actors who you didn't, give em a telephone book and they you know before they start talking. They are funny in you're ready I'm not that guy. I really do feel like a play. Is the thing and fight- a service, the play right. It's gonna be funny if its powers night

You seem like someone who is retained. Their sense of self humility, which is very difficult in this business- I surrendered that years ago and gladly, but you will have done a very, very good job. Do you think it has to do with the way you grew up? growing up in a situation where you didn't go up in the business, you didn't grow up a narrow out, see with someone who's, starved for the concept of food Is I fear he s? Yes, but you? Yes, I mean sorry, I'm stumbling around because there's not a ego fame trap that I haven't fallen into, and I think some of my careful list is that as soon as you start pontificating are you walk out that door and step in some karmic pilot Pooh. So I'm always a little bit super fast. I guess I'm superstitious have been an ass, an idiot, and that makes sense to me

I would never what I'm saying is I was I was raised. It too, you know pride Goethe before a fall and it's about team. It's about the people around here is not about you. You know I was raised like that by both my mother and father, and then I fell in love with basketball. That was a team sport and then I went to Carnegie Melon University and that was train training to be a service to the play I mean really not and then cheers was in my first big kind of outing was chairs, and that was pure and simple, and I got it. I learned that you don't have to be the joke. The job tell her. You can be standing next to the jug dollar and everybody comes up your afterwards as oh, my god, you're funny, even if he had never line. If your support

the funny somewhere near you. It rubbed off so relax lighten up. You know yeah yeah and I can see it in in, like I shall like good place. You can see that you're playing with these other people, who were all terrific, terrific performers and and writers, but you're playing your instrument with vat ya and it seems like that would be a lot more fun. It is. It is cuz. They need to get this and back, and I don't know if maybe it's just personal taste, that's what I love. I love being part of a a group and ensemble where everybody knows their paw really well and I love serving up a good softball to some under hit it off out of the park, as is much satisfaction and bad as hitting it out of the park,

which is why, in my opinion, you will work forever because of all of those things you just mention. You haven't you manatee and a love and an interest of humanity and that's kind of an internal EU tunnel thing you can do that should do that for our much much respect comments, eyes, lit wow. That's that's, incredibly, sweet, I have been accused of not taking complements well, but you are still not by the work now I was now his classic deflection and I couldn't care and I'm good at it, I'm not good at it. It's it's funny, because I grew up watching people on tv, like at sea, Johnny, Carson and my dad introduce Meta all older performers like Jack Penny out loud. I am what I but just about dam is how many last they got not saying a word. If someone

houses and- and I think what you sort of alluded to it when you're done about the cheers and simple, but it also. I think I also saw a lot of this in the good place, which is its your react ten to what's happening around. You mean often on cheers: SAM's behind the bar in your presiding over madness, your presiding over in characters and you're sitting there and you ve got your ubiquitous towel to wipe down the bar for years younger, sipping, your sipping, a soda water or something on your doing some menial task, but it's your reaction to what's happening. That is getting a huge laugh and realize a long time ago, Johnny Carson or for that matter and Johnny Johnny loved Jack Penny, and I think he got a lot of this from Jack Penny and and would have an end, an idle eyes him. You can sit and watch some one too,

and without saying a word, you can let it all washed over you in a very sound way and afterward someone's house you why You are hilarious, nothing, I didn't say anything, but you also knew that you know that was the part you played in that funny moment and if you had stopped listening that funny would have gone away. You really do need that relationship funny and listening or appreciating or loving, are at whatever to make that work. I think I'm curious how you do out in the world because you're easily, you you'd be one of the top three most recognisable people on the planet and here and now

person and you're a real person and we live in an era of hey, there's, there's TED Dancin, and I I want a picture with him and you gotta preserve your sense of self. How do you handle that? Have you navigate the? Can? I just tell you a version of two yesterday, full mask had I mean full on mass, so you saw eyes and I was about it. You see my white hair and I want to say who aware, but it was a drop by and pick up a kind of deal and as the person brought the thing out of the car, he said. How can I ever picture with you, and there is nothing about? He didn't even have a couple, and I have had to get out of the car at the moment, but I was keeping ten feet away from me that I'm sorry, I don't wanna be closed. The people right now

that's our need to sell me where he was in the foreground that is an ominous little guy in the distance What are you doing? You know me probably has some weird thing where he memorizes celebrity: Vain runs. I knew your eye and I he knows like he knows everyone by just the positioning of that vein sites is like that's a dance in vain. I know that I had tabled in air airports are like you know they find out where you are in the world and whose watching what I've had people walk by a kind of clock me no had I describe walk into and then when they get past me and they turn around and look at my white hair and my bald spot. They go yet That's him, but it's all spot it. Having met is essential for the maximum incredible. But you do you. Are you good it? Yes,

I am trying boundary, you bear drawing valid Remsen about ok, Marian. I have issues with that, because her sense of privacy is is very strong, and rightly so. In my the two things going on I actually a big problem they generate a of the time and joy, because people who smiling their remembering something that I was part of that made the black self they're not coming at me, because I had some wild crazy sexuality thing. Guy I'm not hit on that were hit a funny moment,

so that's nice. I've also discovered that no, I dont want to photograph or no, I won't do something. You know if you're in a restaurant you're eating or it's an intimate moment with you know this Marian me. Yes, I can say now benefits. Otherwise it takes more time to say I'm no than it does to say yes and do it quickly, and I also believe- and this is probably a bit of a work I don't know- but I believe that my job as the host people's impression of me- even though I know it's not me- and be gracious about that and match their energy, so that I said I'm not leaving them feeling like there and ass. You know for doing this that I'm making them feel like this was good. For me, too, I think that's kind of

a contract by the way? That's that's TED biting into a rice cracker, which is a signal for everyone to take a little bright, listen to common law, yeah, yeah yeah, I just I've wanted to specify. Is it sounded like someone had cracked your sternum, it's. You can see this evening, but a city ressler, just behind TAT, put his hand on his chest and cracked his stern. So now, I know that we spar sometimes on the pod cast, but you know I am very concerned for your safety at all times. It's really nice yeah, I'm just saying that to get into sad I I know I know, but I do I want you to be safe. You know I care about you. How can I be safe, a d tee, a deed?

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that's something I want to get into like nudity and stuff. Well, nude puppet is fine, it's not of scene which is to pop it. We anyway this got off track fast, my passion project, but if you have one you want to make it happen, you can turn your dream into a reality with square space. He ask where space makes easier than ever to launch your passion project. What they wanted, a business showcase your work or as say, have a nude puppet show where a lot of alcohol is serving. You want to get the word out square space is the tool for you. You they got great templates made by great designers. They can customize everything with a few clicks. They got their power. E commerce functionality good. I don't get to say

that often the one I do it's usually what I'm talking about square space. Do you know what that means was keep moving everything's optimized for mobile right out of the box and is often to patch or upgrade I hate when you have to patch up great yeah. Buying domain is simple: you'll get the help. You'll need was square spaces. Twenty four seven award winning customer support. This is just the way to go and mean come on. What are we doing here? I really want, I really believe square space help me with my adult seemed puppet Show the air serve. A lot of alcohol had to square space, Dotcom slashed Conan for free trial. When you re an alliance, cheesy offer code cloning to save ten percent off your first purchase of a website domain. That squares based outcome, so ass shown in, four code. Conan help me with the puppet show I get body because I've always liked to try- and I am a people pleaser by nature. I wanna play speech

and then- and so now you ve seen that of me right hand. Yes, and then you see the other side of me say at work that wants to if you're eating. If so, is a really delicious brownie. I need to knock it out of her hand if, during the Brown yeah and didn't you enjoy dont you! So now that's the worst thing you do it when I'm enjoying something the most I'm about to bite it than you smack it out my hand it. I think everyone knows. I've been totally ashamed of its the rice, great that's country, crunches. So now I'm disco let the arm and butter- ok, you're allowed to meet this in these times tat. We all have to do what it is we have to do and we have to be honest about you know. If you need to crash, if you need shoe. These are things we want you to. Have you, as anyone else here notice that covered gas is me more prevalent. You know, breaking wind during this moment.

More than ever covert far. It's I'm talking farts, I'm not gonna. We know exactly what you're about. I just don't know that This is supported by any medical. Well, don't be silly, don't be silly. This way, less noise goes way. Noise, there's no cars that no people chatting and talking it's just you in your far to the very end. In my ass prevalent soon, so that Your experience of this covert, that's why you a right in your diary, debts recorded in history happiness that other half will be I underline as man. I think I pretend like this that makes me nervous than that. I'm not fearful, but by the end of the day at my shirts, flee from my body. I am so stinky what happens what's up

I'm seem to be having some kind of ages a breakdown of some guy when you're all about appearance yeah, you know, and the appearance is not that far from the reality, your fine but a future if you're walking around guy is a great day in its in the middle of a pandemic. Now it might be a break make no mistake. She, the happiest unseen stone in awhile, so so unhappy that you're still happy is it the idea I mean. Is it useful the ideas of tat danced and just falling apart in this way. Is that what you did picture my head of a stinky, farting, tat, dance. It and just kills me is your best bet. I black thank you, sir. They ever they say it here. Best work is really added a lot too. So the overall

I now I'm sweating this morning as your lackey so hard. I think it's because I'm thinking about sweaty Sweating workers, YO second of laughing What I need to stop. I swear to God. One thing I want to mention is that Try and keep my family and my kids away from the world that I'm in and what I do for a living, but we went to our favorite sushi restaurant once about years ago you came in and you haven't been, yeah and you saw me, I think, and you came over and set a high and my kids Couldn't believe that I could know you and that you would come where to me and say hi and then you are very gracious to all of them and my stock instantly went up. You know like a hundred and twenty percent with both of my kids and I saw it happened. I saw them think wait a minute we admire that man,

man seems to know you just like a nice. It was a really nice moment and then I bit of shame is it. The second part of this is that this is this Shame immediately came afterwards, which is this is one of those cases where they pride themselves on put your name on the list and they really private. Those which is good if a big deal comes by, they dont bumped them ahead. So we had gotten their much earlier. We had our sea, we were get, We need to leave and I noticed that you in Mary were too but here you gotta wait another hour and we had. Deeds, and I wanted to give you our seats and I said to the person at the restaurant. Can I give them our seats in there are like no You can then ice said to this person, but it's right I said it had that's in, and Mary steam burden should not stand while Conan O Brien sets and the person was like. I agree.

Because everyone understood the pecking order and they were like. Yes, no, we understand that wrong that occurred in sits brain AIDS, while at TED Dancing. There is deep virgin stand, but those are the rules and then I just felt sure I remember I remember that well and we were both so shook up. We went home and at rice, cakes and just gonna gave up. I saw you give up, I thought you decide were not waiting in our video sushi is gas is getting out of here and you flip, as you did flip everyone off in there. China's, we walk and andor. If I'm the public and I'm really ear tat. This was not that moment by the way. You know why going to go to more flatulence, I'm not I'm not going to go there. I will, I will leave it. I will walk away. I'm a more mature man back to you, you're going to say is that when a rest, doesn't see tat Dancin, he turns for

so loudly into the room part. That's it that's lucky. I crop dust all the way to the Your way of saying I deserved better. You have treated an icon who are they I leave? I leave you with this year calling card now. Am I correct you're going to be working next with nobody? After that, it s your through. When when we do return, we are going to return to normal life. Aren't we TED, you know I'm so happy were laughing and being live, nightclub we're being happy and silly and having fun. When you ask that question. My brain freezes and I go I want to say yes, of course, and I my brain can and

and I do believe in being optimistic and all of that, I do say yes, of course, but I have no idea? How and when I can't imagine our business is a touchy feely, you know somebody puts make up and Does your hair first thing in the morning, so they're all of your face? How do you do that? One? Then you go home again case and talk and people are all of you putting microphones. I knew it is the most in your face kind of business, I'm not a hundred percent sure, and I don't even mean just Obviously I do you protect me How are you and ensure that company Are you going to deal with this? But yes of course? Yes, I do believe that, tyres will out. I dont know when, but I do believe that this is not the pandemic to end the world. I believe that this is a shoe,

lesson for us all an opportunity to go awry. The world is different climate change is real. It's me everything move fish literally a hundred miles north, because the waters therein are too warm Viruses are probably, and animals are doing the same thing we I'm gonna live, and I changed earth this. Moving so fast that we can achieve. That effort play out I'll, be fifty years and we'll get used to this now every here we have a once in a lifetime event every other week. You know We are now dealing with things moving so fast. My I'm really out. Repairs are never there's this guy Did you get my dream? My hope my wish, science, we'll be back.

The forefront of how we need to live our lives we ve been met. Social, political will. Religious, belief, systems can have led the way and that has to be over. You know them It's one thing to say this, but I believe that if your beliefs or set standing next to a loved one whose dying sadly horribly I'm in a very lonely way. Then you I have to say, wait a minute. Science actually is more important, and these, doctors who are saving our lives, are using the same science. That claim, colleges still using to say heads up life is about to come in much different if we don't act immediately and drastic play, so I I I mean anyway- nobody you don't you bring this up. It makes me reminds me that I know your father an archaeologist yes and

father, is still a micro biologist, infectious disease scientist and it's interesting. Whenever I've talked to him, he doesn't get hysterical. He doesn't get whenever I touch about this whole thing. This is him. His whole life he's a scientist. His whole life is science, so he'll always say. Well, let's take a look at the testing. We got to see what the testing says. We have to see what the tracking is. We need, and I have always thought that we live. Increasingly in in a world, and you see this if you watch, if you watch the news, everybody wants to have something to say immediately. They want to have a strong opinion, because strong opinions trend right, strong opinions get a hashtag and they they blow up online nuanced opinions and thoughtfulness doesn't really track, and so we're living in this world where we have drifted farther and farther and farther apart from just nuanced thing.

And hysteria is not the answer, but I think you're right, I am spend some one. That was just, I think, because of the way I grew up believed in science and if I told my dad, I don't feel well, I don't think I can go to school today. His ship would literally take it. Take our temperature he'd take a swamp of our throughout the help we can put us through. There was no. Like ok or you gotta go anyway. He would say well, let's see what science sense and then I'd be library, fuck, gotta go as I was saying- and I do feel like silver lining, which is something we have touched on a few times here is if we drift more or do more to ass fat and if this pandemic gets well streets,

and Wall Street says: oh, my god. We just we just wiped out a decade of gains because we refuse to go if we invest a billion dollars in virus research, we gotta do that. Meaner. So I'm I'm I'm optimistic that what I am to desire. I think what we need to get over and you see it all. The time you see guy died in a little teeny robot going up to our states under water because of a flood and taken somebody off the roof and risking their lives. You see people, do it all the time every day, if they start saving each other's lives and got his I believe in here's my political view, they would mean smack and each other and not talking this, but if just relate on a human. We need to fix what's in front of us, the roaring fire coming our way. What do we do about it? You're not, stop and talk politics. You know you're gonna, do that

I think I am full of humanity and carrying and all about stop, and I just hope we don't have to suffer too much to come to that because life has changed and it doesn't have to be awful, but it's not gonna be the same. The same deal anymore just knocked? This was kind of a heads up, yeah a unit, obviously doing what I do we I've always tat an audience and I dont see their who's gonna gather and sit in an audio. I mean for something they really want to see like see, original Hamilton cast me together. People will risk their lives, but they're not gonna, die, you're not doing it for me and oh, that's, Oh so, but we're all gonna yeah I'd. I don't know, I don't know, I don't know obviously, and I mean show business, because I have no answers- I'm not doktor found and

and I'm glad glad enough fancy You know. One of the things will be a plus side. He says with false humility and fear, but I may be right. Celebrities are gonna, be like how hum I don't want it. You know I don't wanna hear a celebrity talk. I I want to hear the scientist I wanna. I want to say thank you to the first responders. I you know, I think, we're not gonna be Hopefully it's funny. You say that because even though Europe liberty and and I'm working my weight in that into that rome- the what's interesting as have always rooted against it. An end I've always in the nineties.

Century actors worth we're not were buried with prostitutes outside of TAT S. Yes, yes, exactly known ass, true, and so so people forget that when, when Abraham Lincoln was was shot in forts Theatre, the big scandal wasn't as much that, oh, my god, someone's shot. The president it was, he was in a few when he was shot, we gotta get him out of here and it isn't it. He was in a theory, wasn't watching pornography, he was watching alike, comedy buddy, such is seen as such a disgrace crazy, like grab them and said: let's get about ear and and and run him across the street because he can't die in a theater, that's just to embarrassing lazo I've. Always this part of me that always rooted for a return. You know, especially in a day when p

say. Look I don't know how I feel about this. Let's check in with you know Chloe card ashen. I don't I'm kind of rooting for that time to be over with the exception. View and I still think you and I should be held in high regard. So I think I can I can I and I get her off my screen. Triassic yeah, I don't know I'm serious. I think some celebrities on death and whose courage yours have lasted a long time for TED. That would be a You know in the late seventies, you know early eighties or for me early nineties, oh well, into the next year, we should be held up in high regard us very few of us about George Clooney. You know just there A few Triche Clooney, that's the only other name. You came up way.

Aren't you at the very top and at the very, the top people tend to say when you people tend to say, there's you know. There's Clooney this Dancin, there's Conan there's share and then that's about it This is this is getting a little closer to some very mean spirited satire, not at all. I was actually be only against myself. Everyone else there is is pretty high up before and I think, if anyone's laughing at anyone, it's me well. This is what do you do now? There's a wearing a wrap this up. What is your day now you're going for a walk? They did that we we went on of forty minute. Why column often puff out make sure we're gonna gasping for exercise our lungs and our legs, gonna walk and then came back and started working on this. Yet it is at that. Yes, the twenty minutes of tax set out

by the way, thirty minutes just play there. That is no Jericho, in a way. We're gonna play a short section of it, because hearing you you're, so gracious by it, it's going so badly for so long that it was just a joy to sit here and listen to my God humbling humbles humbling, will listen. I want I want to. Let me know when you marry are taking a walk the next time. I want come by and try and get one of those paparazzi shaming shots. Someone's were so once mask is slightly below their nostril, get it they get a shot of them. Gonna, say well, tat Dancin doesn't seem to feel like he doesn't need to cover both nostrils. Is what I do, I keep wanted to set a proxy. I will stop. I will pose I'll. Do any horrible, embarrassing thing you want as long as you can guarantee me this,

publish someplace because you're all over us and no one buys the phone. Grab so go away. I've been writing. I've been writing my bike and an end like build lot- belong alongside and they'll shout and I've shouted at them with a big smile. You'll get nothing You know, what's happened, what there's? No! red carpet anymore. You know, there's no by realise where they can get their celebrity photos, so they're out stocking dogwalkers in the hold the Wall TAT. I want to give you any longer. You are a joy to talk to, and it's it's it's. No! It's really really seriously. Just wonderful that you would do this limit. Let me make a square reseca. Well, I adore you. Common abroad

and I love being around you? I love doing your show, even when we were in front of an audience in China be entertaining. I am always relaxed and feel really good, But myself when I leave Europe a wonderful man and I am happy to see your face truly am thank you. Thank you. Thank you as and I, same, goes back right at you, Whatever this lighting is that you ve got right now, keep it. What if you look like there's a at the second Lucille Ball show after I love Lucy, there was a second show and ended with a shot of Lucy in and she was shot through a break of cheese Randy. You look you're the most attractive Five year old woman, I've ever seen, zoom rectify hates, had so much really and take care and all my love em-

customary much loved back to all of you. Thank you guys, thank you hands and all about thanks for gas. Everyone, social distancing right now and well? The first thing that comes to mind for me is how can I get together with my friends and have a drink? If I have to social this, debts and then, let's say your Miller alight and your whole thing is always been: hey man, it's Miller time. What's all get together and connect over a few beers boy, it's hard to do that when you can't be with your people, bars or closed right now. Temporarily, everyone's you know quarantined, so just got me thinking I don't know about you guys, Sonia Matt. You got me thinking if you can't get together with a couple of friends in a bar, lower alike, can still be enjoyed with your people, just not in bars and or at social gatherings. You soon

Saying what I'm saying is you don't have to give up on the Miller like her? I could meet you guys, for a Miller lie, but we all have to stand like fifteen feet apart we can meet on line and crack open a cool miller like yeah yeah. I do I do happy hours, my friend some as you know, it's still marrow light. It still got all the goodness of a million lie all white and stuck it still Miller. I've had a few it still Miller light over time. You always enjoyed yeah. I've got some down the fridge and I take out those Miller lights and I'm gonna crack one added a preordained. I know we can all enjoy him together online, Sonia near that that some in I like beer, you like beer so Miller lighted the original lighten viewer. I like that because, as you all know, I'm famously trim among leading Moline Python. What I'm at home quarantining I like to enjoy a classic light beer. It's available for delivery today and get it delivered

hey my Miller, I say and remember to celebrate responsibly, you know Miller, brewing Company, Milwaukee Wisconsin. Ninety six calories and three point two carbs per twelve ounces. A crowd grass. Always have always will it's up there with things that I just despise like cruelty. I've had set aside, you couldn't think of any just crawled, known odors I'd. Those are the two I hate cruelty its needless and and crab. Ass. It ruins you're alone crab grass. I dont know crackers. Will your new homeowner you're gonna find out? Ok crowd. Grass grows up on the lawn, It ruins it from looking nice. What can I do?

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He was when he was getting set up with his recording Estonia. I wasn't there for this interview, but are crack advanced team? Will back in June samples and Adam sacks got him? two speed yeah. I want to talk about that. We're going to have a little bit I'll, just very briefly say that I was getting on the call. You know those to begin the interview- and I heard I didn't announce myself, because I could tell that everybody was really busy, but I heard you guys talking tat through how to engage. I guess the audio and set it up on his computer. He had no idea that this was being recorded and he is so nice and so patient really lovely, but it's also hilarious. It made me feel better because ok rumoured constantly by my son- and so just because I'm inapt computers, and an end trying to work any kind of mechanism and

So soon you spend a lot of your time going. No, no, not bad that, and so so nice for me to hear tat, danced and struggle in the Zack same way that I struggle only, I think we still work. Grace I can easily the difference in the listeners can go back. A couple episodes in here your version getting set up on sooner compared with me. I think, we're just different people but who's to say much. Why is better tat danced to tap dance? it's a bad way way better. I already loved him so much hearing how patient he was and how nice he was to everybody just made me love him. So much more he's. He has some sort of zen like thing when the way he was being walked wait and he was so patient through it all. I just I'm just was now I'm seeing TAT is just being used as a giant club hit me. I want to make my own eyes. I want to make it clear that no com, somehow sermon constant physical pain from my similar foot.

When there is and that maybe that makes me a little can tankers. I wasn't playing football. The time I was I was near. A football stadium ring a comic book when I was hit by a bus cover for car football injury. Anyway, let's check out this is tat. This is the real tat Dancin a window into who this man really is struggling as we all do in a world. We don't understand you. I hate you look great! So can you? Can you hear me yes up and tat, I feel like an underwater. You know what I just push them so far and they were almost touching. I pulled my little about it. It's ok! Now my blurry, you are blurry. I want

There might be something over your web cam such try getting old, cleaner. Yet like a little like a micro fibre cloth like the kind of thing you used to clean glasses, that I am not trying to sarcastic, but do I look like someone who has all the right now about a shirt, shirt, shirt or appeals where it because it's never been quite like this- is that I prefer not to have to watch myself. Is I'm so much better looking than Conan. It would be so distracting for me. Please please pass that on. That's where it is like a focus thing is my hand, is not this out of focus it's fine for us if it's not right now to find for me by dramatic? Do you mind if we look at a couple computer settings things just place, but trust me this will be embarrassing. Bulgaria, I just disappear for a second or that yeah, that's not gonna nets have anything you're, still rights

in the middle of it? can I dragged you subway yeah anything. You need the time to do that. Sorry, did you go up to the top? Now, if I pushed red button on my audio recording that yet was supposed has the the red dot turn into like a black square. And went on to a black box where that's that's great. So what What if my voice was ass, a misty as the visual of me be weird. Sorry, I'm talking, I'm not asking it. This is Adam sacks by the wages join I by Adam. Thank you, fuzzy, I'm for this really love, like we d be able to eat it. And s reply to me. Yes,

I'm a new up. I'm just use a little box. I had saved now say: yes, a guy now that's gone record the other, not not yet. I have to go back. Do you see ass now I could make you, how do I make you big again by hitting green the other three little buttons red, yellow, green you're just a little thing and the clock. What I have is because I moved you guys. Oh yeah, I have you a little bit less than I have a big we'd, better go back the meaning. I think there must be some known on camera lives, so plans have you tried, like literally just maybe taking a client writing it yeah my mind. I wanted to say also to interpret the taxpayer like. Yes, I'm not See. Do you see a thing this you see. Tat is all I have is zoom check White Box over your face. If you go to finder, which Smiley face

We all do regarding this. This is a good start. Your you should have heard I set up the first time. It was very similar. Varies, why I white box? There is Skype and arrow and applications in a balloon subject that you can go to your desktop and say where's, my does apply, so I ask where would I find them? I don't know what attachments sister had that's me now? Can you hear the recording? It might be that we have to go without headphones, roomy stance, he not you, don't have your Do you think I doubt observers to get me? Did you

hold. I can go. Look it's the headphones, thereby that's grows into my wife's Ipad and I have an old computer that is that prong airplane prong thing you stick What a square lockdown thing began. This thing I can do it only three minutes. Ok, thank you. So much time. Thank you. I know this is promising the six good. While this my work, that's great war. So sorry about this, but we want to do is waste your conversation recorded and so not going so quick time, Blair, where's krypton command tab. You can together tat, whereas the command left the space bar. I'm not finding

December. First, just gotta pod, swag dot com and use the code black Friday for forty percent off them and so testing will start a real one. Now but how do I do that now and then how do I get back? So I can see all again once you get that boarding going out. I added to that is that far quicker Blair I'm fine, I love it for you, so being we're gonna, clap on a silent forest it'll be one to three clap, ok and whether one two three

Colonel Ryan needs a friend with solemn of session and Conan o Brien as himself produced by me, MAC Goarly, executive produced by Adam Saxon, Jeff, Rasa, team, cocoa and calling Anderson and Chris Ban and add your wolf theme song by the White Stripes incidental music by Jimmy the Vienna, our supervising producers and Blair and our associate talent producer is Jennifer samples. The shows engineered by will backed it. You can rate and review the show apple podcast, and you might find your review featured on a future episode. Gotta question for Conan call the team cocoa Hotline at three two three four: five one to a genuine and leave a message. It too could be featured on a future episode and if you have an already, please subscribed. Conan o Brien needs a friend on apple pie, guests, stingier or wherever fine pod casts are down.

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