This is jack upon gas number, two. Ninety nine! Without control and me Jocker willing good evening outcome good evening. So there is a video in its it's out there in the world on Youtube or whatever you can find it in its debts of the battle of remedy, the two thousand. in the summer time and there's this big fight. Fight no one on and you can Oh, it's pretty intense, there's machine gun fire, a bunch of people. Rounds. Downrange people are yet and embark out orders and pass on information, and you can kind of put together that their work in it bomb dropped from air support on a vehicle that the insurgents had been utilised

fighting from and they d get the bomb run and right is the right is the bomb is about to hit. There's a low in the gunfire because guys are taken cover that bomb is gonna hit, then so is low in the fire and then the bomb hits. And there is a massive explosion and you hear a couple hoots, and then you hear this if you this bellowing laughter from one person, and you can tell that the laughter sort of its Surprise, it's some excitement it's some level of relief in some. It's also just some twisted dark military whom her that's, making this person

Bela with this laughter and I watch that video sometimes. And I listen to video, sometimes not for the fire fighters. for the bomb drop but to hear that laugh. that laugh is coming from South stone. Then you c mon camera. But if you knew safe then that laugh is unmistakable and that's what I like to hear. Then that's reflective of life because, F was: he was tough Rennie, Brave and he was smart, any was creative and he was a combat leader.

But above all, those characteristics. But I like to remember most about him now. Now that he's gone is his laugh. Then humor. with a blessing and laughter is an antidote to pain and suffering. And anguish, time is the only relief for those things. I have another friend who once told me: everybody's got their Vietnam. And in this particular case, he was talking about the fact that his first girlfriend when he was a kid older than him and was bigger than him, and she would just pick him up and against his will and it wasn't anything I could do about it, and so just had to deal with it. He just had to get through it.

everybody's got their Vietnam told me, and he wasn't in Vietnam, nor even a veteran but he was just adding humour to life. But there is some truth in that statement ever We struggles in life. those struggles. Very some struggles we face are imposed on us by the world sums I was we face or imposed on us by ourselves. they also vary in intensity. In consequence and depending on who you are It's your problem when it your struggle, that's the world and, as was with safe when the best is to overcome struggle, is humor comedy. then that same friend of mine,

Certainly, as used humour to get through his life there's some of his struggles and some of those struggles more severe than just gettin kissed by a seventh greater, his name. Theo Van and he's here with us tonight to share some of his struggles. And some lessons he learned in making everyone likes. as a comedian in old, overcome those the goals that we all face, Theo Theo Van thanks for coming I'm to be around thank you, rather me. What's goin on yeah, I'm sorry to hear about Mister Starr man. I didn't know that guy indefinitely, never been doing like bars Marty. You know, I'm not had their rights against anyone know what have I done. I don't know I mean I guess I have had it had begun. Think I'm have It's actually one of my favorite alike,

overall model is a kind of rice. I think it is echo confirm I can neither macabre nor debt but jasmine? If anybody at this table had more spheres arise, some view, rather, to be honest, man was of no offense but an advanced raised here. Ok, I'm sorry, but arm yeah man. I never had anything like that, but you I think you are on this happy to be your man. I think everybody does have their own, the MA, you know in some ways sometimes on small and another big. You know some of them the inside others and sometimes around the outside I was on my kids. came home, and this was, I was told, the navy at the time came home and who is like wars, the one on and newer something happened overseas and I was trying to contend with how we're gonna get guys prepare. For this combat situation, and I came home one time and one of my he had complained about something else. I'm kind of real struggle. I forget what it was, but I remember I first I was coming

What do you get? It may work? how say those words. I was able to keep us Alfred check, but when I realized was what I would you're doing in life. That's that's! That's! That's your world right and so when that world gets tough and you don't know anything else, manner that struggle that is your Vietnam yeah. and that's where people end up It's. You know some girl kiss non you when you're whatever, since then and aid, while the tough par was other people were walk like the beggar boy, like my brother and his friends, the bus with picked him up purse, and so did it would come and get me in. So that's when she would pick me up. And it was like my first, Girlfriends was also like exciting Canada have or but always kind of embarrassed honesty to have like in front of I didn't. Whenever you just kind she was just. Offer them may now played you think baseball and she couldn t talk about road cells. You disappointed yeah desert. I mean she was doing that you know so

he had heard him didn't even have their back there Let's get into up for the people of lots of people. Don't know who you are. I guess that might listen. This part gasped. I know you're really famous as a comedian right yeah, that's the deal you have done with the well as a comedian man, and so I'm grateful have that I'm I'm happy bearded, eighty guys, man in our really man, you know I you grew up. Where were you born I was born in Louisiana. I was born in Louisiana. and are coming to Louisiana? So now real PA may at a good place. We have taller stature, Ronald Reagan air He never seen it, but we got it so it was ever like it. What's the connection with Hopper to Saco Mizzou they're, always trying to like get in there except his thumbs off and- and you know, I'll, get the real are spent, but why did why Reagan connected to that

at all. They just somebody dug in some way that had enough copper enjoyment, I think, donated to the city. To be honest, I know your dad was like older gentlemen. When you were born, oh yeah, your my dad was seven years old, but I was born in nineteen ten, an arm and he was from Nicaragua and he was so use a senior citizens. When I met him, you know so Eddie was from Nicaragua yet not, I saw that he was from blue field. Nicaragua yeah he's from Bloomfield I've. I never been there, but I heard a lot of averred. It's a tough placed a basin has because their politics by hard really nice. I heard that What's what your dad's like background, was he from their cause? I I guess this place was kind of settled by european pirates. Have you heard this? yeah. I don't know my dad was in his younger. I don't even see any other pictures of them, so I don't know I patches I'd ever seen him Reno.

the parrot I've never seen any of you know pass work when I know em at this. You know it was just a lot of stories in There was more like the stories by the time I madame stories you know they they get. Articles on em over time. They gain traction, they get tread, they did they take. different avenues and by the time I knew it was more. I was kind of with no just a story: No, the refined stories, you know what would he? How do you end up in America? I don't know man I really don't know him and those are things I wish that I'd have been able to know better, and I think those are things worse than on this life for me anyway, where I feel disconnection sometimes is not having a you know this? Some of those heads a conversation when I was old enough to kind of care. You know. and yet when I was, I too am once I gotta like the twelve or thirteen. I kind of Rob was like it was kind of embarrassing. You know. Have

such an order, my dad would fall he'd be asleep at like a van to fall asleep at the carpool. When you come pick us up, it fall asleep and so the lady wake him up. It was always like so much extra staff. The you don't think you do as a kid just a lot of like you know, but yeah. Was cool, though man. It was also interesting. you know he knew a lot of people are about to die or body introducing new about. Does what was a deal with your mom. I mean he must have been some kind of a you know him, at some cool care risks, because our wish him off my mind. thirty two when I was born and even any money

so I don't know who would bang and oh do? We know that it is saying that is piety won't believe about women that work related to me. That is a pioneer moment. You gonna talk about a pioneer woman was yes, your wife or something was a super like at a coma, remember that it gave him his maybe it was ready to help, nice, where the small combs we managed to keep the end. He'll keep em in Cuba a lot of time. We see a lot of cuban man still get their small coma than you think. might have been the critical factor for for your mom. Looking at him. Thinking down. Look at that I think in a small town you know is that some might understand now where's your mom from Covington Louisiana to choose from Illinois. So she does. hard work and lady. You know my mother really likes to work hard and cheese delivered newspapers and stuff, and I was a kid and delivered all type of stuff, oh she's, to deliver

just for a little off some company do not go lane or car at night and lay onto on the boxes, eat them bitches right just imagine being the moment as big as the box. You just laying on your opening up and that's my Vietnam here in the dark, you're trying to be quiet, dude and some of the wood table extra. You know you like not be alright and you just follow you get in and get as many cookies as you could have you're Lyon on your mouse lay and open on like chocolate chip cookies. Now. These are remember the ones they head were kind of hard Qana, yellow cookie with a bit of countries, granulated sugar cane, a square look like glitter of the short Britain. now you get it. I was excited by your story like a picture that, but I I just don't feel like char I'd, feel like cookies, there's chocolate your cookies and in everything else is kind of just not in the same ballpark,

I don't know about agree with that. Sir, are you don't have to agree on everything? giving you my perspective. You know and appreciate, given to man an hour I will I want you to talk to each chip cookie, I think I watch. I wonder where they find what you eat it now I don't know A man go a very pretty finally like mango oddly enough, they now and make it for us now. In fact, I don't really I've like. I grew up my my we now have a lot of money when I was grown up, and so we had a lot of hamburgers right. Like in the morning. I would have are hamburger on english muffin, oh yeah launch out, have hamburger on bread and then for dinner of Hamburg bonds. You get no all meals could be murders, but I didn't really are. Even stake until hours, maybe like twenty two or twenty three oh yeah yeah, because you just they didn't taste good to me. me too, I would think why not described this thing out and put her on it, put it into a patty, his little catch it,

so I don't know. Maybe it's funny to watch me eat a burger on a method for breakfast Yok at sea, I think that will be unique, show, watch and strong many stuff that more dang take. You know maybe, a petty for some kind of a unique delectable in a kind of a cookie from another country, or some I can see that you cannot manage it. Would your fingers it's almost like a grenade almost to regular guy. You know did your mom and dad stay together based it, gather pro while men had for children and and then I don't know what happened. I don't know what happened in that's kind of when I started to become like mentally. You know. Aware of my world in need that point my dad was older. He didn't live with us and then He said for children in my mom was Workin allowed in that's where we were three mom basically ended up as a single mom yet It was a single mom and

and yet are lower. You are almost no what you would expect kind of having a child of children with the older man. You know what kind of expectations you might have by it, but I don't know you know, I don't know what kind of comfort she needed in a world. Maybe she needed to have a family. I don't know what she needed at that time. Bye yeah, so they had that had children, then my dad was kind of gone and then I got a little ashamed of my. I got embarrassed a little bit. I was just at that age. I think we're children get, were there if they're, not like other children, if that any things out of the norm than they feel like something's wrong with them, where they feel disembarrassed on three issues, we are currently examining in America. Doesn't I dont forget matters if Europe, you know like Tom, your kids are gonna, be a bear. I got the idea or or like Dwayne Iraq. Johnson you get to be like all. Here comes the eighty eight again matters when you are going to be

You can't go through an age period where their embarrassed by you here and then you gotta Conaway. just work through it? I guess, and hopefully on the other side- and they realize are, you know, does not too bad, but I guess weird thing? You said in your mom's expectations. I mean that the matter is he's seventy you're born. I mean expectations. Are there not expectations facts are he ain't gonna be around all much longer right, do you know where she lay at a time of year but time is getting expiration date, so she signed up for the kind of signed up for that activity here, yet. I think I think, when times I tartan not hold that acts. When I look at my life in places that we're all uncomfortable for me as a child like and I'm not comply I'm just trying to share some of you know, share what some of that was like. me, but yeah

I think it was tolerance I got you felt like you warm. of a plan like nobody planned or, if you It was a plan that was destined to fail. You know saying so, then that almost make you feel like What's going on, if my commander, in chief here my mother, Sutton, set me up in this place, that doesn't seem like it has. Statistically this the same super smart now, Now, how old were you when you started? Having fought like that? What is it? You know that those are gonna thoughts. When I was a kid like, I was just thinking. You know machine gun, throwing rocks. You note

can apart pieces of furniture here, let me just talking ignorance hated seems like you're sitting here. Thinking about the grand scheme and all these plans are cow. How old? Were you new start going down that road? I don't think I was ill. I think I was older when what asked are realising that stuff. Ok of his like looking back. He a lot is that's looking back, but I think it I'm I'm dealing with the ramifications of some of that without knowing it without always wondering what. Why do I feel certain ways or what about behave certain ways, so subconscious. That's probably just that. Probably just a subconscious feeling of man distant seem like this is gonna, even as little kid you're, like men, were eaten Rahman again right who came up with this plan rapid year, there's just no play like moms work and there's no dead, so also. You start to get concerned for your dad health than you had this weird uncomfortable thing where you're supposed to be kind of a child me freedom? Just

Not have any worries, but you had these weird extra worries of like you know your dad is getting older You know- and so armor be like eight years old and walk in a church to win. Dad. We had a church, a few blocks away and would ask me what the where he could walk the cause of the site, in Louisiana, though there come up through dislike kneecaps. Just like you know, you got a thousand long, legged man very right there under the sidewalk you know, and some as you know, you know they just

Just real femur along those. So you have, the sidewalks would do a damn. They'll be in a damn trap is always of it. Did you take this high walk on as it can take more time to get where you're going to treat as much as I would like to Oregon, ensure bitters natives under part of digital guys, so I remember walk or my dad and he's like. Can I walk here and stuff? I deaths of danger. I remember getting this weird space of like just hyper concern in awareness. That's what I think it was. Awareness so then had a lot of awareness slip through the net led to you, said behaviors worker behaviors. Do you think that this situation where you were, you act, get in trouble and who were you you know turn, into the delinquent kid were you, China work real hard to make sure you always had money. I mean what what Did you react to this situation well

think looking back on its hinges, goes in my life. Right now been doing a lot of work on this kind of stuff, specifically like China. Just just get enough comfort in the sediment. Others Terry layers as real like this, those deep layers, it's our to plant routes? I notice in my adult life and I think, has caused was the soils Jesus it's not enough room in that soil from when I was a key when I was younger. and I wouldn't care if I was able to plan things in my life that we will be able to grow effectively. But I've had trouble doing that like relationships, commitment to things, one die like a family or have a relationship but struggle with it so and scientists in very funny did I feel bag ass? You know the one day I mean everybody on your show, somebody Dian

You know somebody get naked out and then after a comment- and I believe it I'm sit near because there's no one really that do do my part, gaslights, expecting or anticipating or going to be let down if they're, not. You know Did you write levity in the situation? It's ok had to be funny here you can you talk about, just may happen, and death is far I am concerned. It will still be ago. Ok, ok, good yeah, I think so one the things that I would know that unnoticed now. Looking back is that I didn't whenever I realized that that was my life situation, that my dad was real older and that my mom was work and all the time didn't Believe that the world was a comfortable place for me, so as a real young kid I just those both elements in the atmosphere, Rogers Made that choice has my spirit made twas, whatever it is some inside me, it was a choice I may like. I would make a choice now: it's like

trust the world to be a safe place. For me. So whatever brought me into this world. Whatever the elements are, these are not trustworthy elements and not that Freedom Untrussing, not that I'd be mean to budgets in my spirit knows that you have to take care of yourself so then you start him. Try manage everything yourself. So I was always really concerned with the only thing I had left and like people would look at me. You know what the boss drop me off like in the poor neighborhood in There was so old and my mom was always gone work him. She wasn't like a mom. Some of the other kid tat so said only thing. Control was me how you saw me that was The only piece of my image ahead was what you saw may so I would like bite to school not enough to get off the poor boss. I would like, on but friend certain key,

so you thought I was in a certain group. I guess I was hyper concern with the kind of image management it's all I had left and I wouldn't of China to be seen around my family, I kind of because I just did him what I don't know. I just hyper concern with the only thing that I have. There are still I control over was my own really, and this is something any Santa makes sense, but it's like this is something that you realizing reflectively. Looking back, like at the time you were like your car alive There are so many do this you're just like manner. I don't really want to get on that also get off that bus. I'm gonna buy school as seemed like a smart thing to do right, I think, but dark dad. I had so much awareness. I think I'll just so away are always, and so then you know, I think I was making choices that I didn't want people to see me a certain way. How am I gonna be so then I got How can this? How can I

manage what people think of me was. That was the was the midge that you wanted to project, because you could see. There's plenty but that their in those kind of rough situations- and there are some people I'm gonna get straight AIDS and I'm gonna go to college. I do all this other stuff for some well, I'm gonna, be you know, I'm it to become a the toughest delinquent that there can be in people and be scared me, so you know get some going towards like the gang lie for whatever what was it you are kind of moving towards. Will you an athlete we plant sports, play? Some decent sports in our neighborhood was real, dicey. Bro. We had a lot of people. Man we have one dude would sneak my. We play football. He bring matches with him and burn you while you're doing defense and that's crazy. We were thinking okay, who's guarding me. You know Thomas this kid Thomas. Their needs is matching you down or you're. You know if you're not making cuts real hard, so shit like that man we played in this one feel that had a big

whole right in the middle of it date or not to the middle drop off the cyber, this church football field, man and tat he would go. missing in that bit- you know- is a couple family of eleven. I swear to God. After a long game was a family attend law, somebody in their low Jennifer somebody but I remember they ve had it. I remember member, make girl. They would put him on the football field. Plant football descend. The neighbourhood spray pain a number on this one, kids back it is kind of shit man for staff. Combat what about organise sports in high school? Did you play back when I was eleven? I got into that when I was eleven. So yeah. I think one thing we just were around our neighbourhood. A lot we get we get home from and we would just be up to our own devices. You know, but why they started to notice. Was like I did in real untrustworthy relations. With the world. So

I was always worried about. I think what people are thinking of me. I fell it. People like me, I felt like I think, because sometimes a biologist such an uncomfortable kid. Sometimes they are needed after so I I'll give you were laughing, you couldn't diesel me and laugh at the same moment like at that moment like was down to that moment like when you were done laughin. I don't know what you thought of me, you know it was kind of scary, because I think I didn't think much myself The only way out of here about myself from moment to moment was how other people felt about you know. If I'm right, is that so I think that's why needed laughter, because it was like a man if I can get, it was the only thing I trusted. Is that there is no way somebody could be laughing and I can see.

them laugh in and have enjoy and and hate me at the same time you know just so there was like That was the only equation that made that's me was undeniable and I think that's and I was a hyper sensitive kid. You know people on a sensitive inside their able. You know they can manage things better. I was hypersensitive, you know alone, so I'm really grateful that God gave me whatever, I needed to be able to find humor. You know but other kids in my neighborhood and in the environment that that in my face didn't get that, and so it's and about China. Guinea self pity I'm just trying to share what I'm thinkin and feel, and at the same time you know

and a lot of this stuff I've been work into recently, like in the past few weeks, pretty heavily and so a lot of it. a on my brain as well. World scary about will not scary act from your perspective is the Someone stopped laughing. You just want to try and make him laugh again. You can get that. Did that. Did that good feeling back you'll? What feel it. I just need a sick man. This is a place for I feel ok if they're laughing. You know. so yeah. So I think- and I wasn't like Guph dude, I one like foreign and put nor anything like that and I went some- she booty creeper some I'd just like to say and things and- and I was real away or suave- would see things cannot go on I was real aware and so. So it was found to be able to get people to laugh at my was red, didn't think they were, and then you start manage and laughter because laughter becomes Your main.

Tool that you have to feel ok, so Then you start using laughter almost like your call and plays and stuff, and you have these little. Those are my weapons. You know That was my nerves. That was my first said. You know, I wasn't, I didn't have a lot. fiscal competence, so so laughter was it really for me that was my biceps. You know, seems like too there's our opportunity for someone that, in your position, where you have this kind of like insecurity and kind of a little bit of a paranoia against the world to go down the path of like drug and alcohol abuse. We all know where that path ends up if we stay on it. So how that enter your life into what? What about the had be drug now call down there? What was, what was that like? What was that influence? How how did you manage that part of the world

yeah. You know that's interesting, you know I have family members in my own. Close family at gab suffer with addiction and stuff like that. And I really love and also love thing about this kind of stuff, like this kind of stuff from me talking about field The star of some people say: will you now feel is the past, and actions is what matters in? That's true, I believe that, like I can think all day, probably not going to help me act any different and I know it mom life. If I do act a certain way, my thoughts will follow me. My thoughts really are your troops really, you know why They say in a locker room, recovery rooms that you can thank your way in the right action, but you can act your way right thinking. It's a common terminus, easy fur,

will that struggle with addiction or addictive personalities to understand that its real simple so sir, was the question of the limit nerve, just just as foreigners but you know how old were you and alcohol got introduce? How old, oh yeah, we're I'll do it? I remember I found some liquor on some Alice. I liquor some peach man, star, burs, baby breath, Watermelon sat down on the top shelf. Do it was nine different colours and I found some moody mags up there to same time, titty literature the next thing you know dude, I'm ejaculated Indus DIS lay. I remember all it off the shelf of animals. I never made of top shelter there, but for our topsail you know I don't come from a real balance and family. So there do not break up masturbate and you know it, and I remembered ass black out, fallen off the shelf and up

they fell MA am six and a half feet almost eight be so not fall. How do you at this time probably about thirteen, you know- and so then, but I their family members who are struggling with drugs and alcohol. So I had this really odd in see that I didn't see. That is like a away for me to get in a day, I didn't see that as an escape really from me. So I never use that as an escape. As I got a little bit old Roma life started realising that I was uncomfortable, and I was Some of the survival techniques are used as a child were helping me anymore. You mean even the comedy peace. Even making people laugh. Did that start to wear out well or what your the only connection that I knew so I had a tough time make a real connections with people with,

see women if I wanted to be in a relationship or or I think, sometimes friends or knowing that a connection with safe. Like sometimes of that overdue. A connection Somebody'Ll say he's fine, they will be there and I'll still be hyper worried about it. You know it's fine, it's somebody else has totally normal, but could Some connections with people, are always feel real. New is scary to me. I think I was scared to make them. so anyway, I started realizing. I was trouble making real connections with people. People, kind of like I don't know you, but I feel like I would be share in a lot of stuff, And so then I got in I started going to some recovery meetings, twelve step, and I couldn't late to the drugs and alcohol, but our could relate when people talk about how they felt you know just just the feelings oh ah started learning about other people feel. So

these ways and it's ok to have feelings or the struggle with them and whatever and so that's when I really started to like being a part of recovery and there's all types of the meanest of stuff for everything is recovery for people it where shirts, I don't fit for that. too tightly struggle really drives me down a round with echo of human life kind of new jobs in industry and into a bad sassy area dealer. Is you guys believe nobody friggin, horizontal spoken, take up a couple extra small, this head part is: there is a small boy out there somewhere might be on average, let them afford tracker that we talk about the target by worth somebody with a smaller sir. If we talk about that. So yes, though I think that's rise, found twelve step was interesting and then I pray that was later in life right. Yet I was later in life, so

for a long time. I think I'll just chose comedy because it do so comedy all it's like a lifestyle of disconnection you're in town for four five days and then you go so if you have a relationship starting you like up, you know you got to go to chuckle Willie's Evans COM, it's how its ideal out of town and then and then you're in a new place where you can have something. You know it's like the The moss of life never has a chance to grow on you really. You keep out runnin the moss and the moss is things that dad Rio earth we're barnacles anything they just you. Evade things enough comedy just offered me that I don't even know. If I wanted to be a comedian I wanted to not have to be somewhere, so how old were you when use did your first? You know, God

stage did your first stand up gig. Let me thank man. it was Rwanda dude. I think it was two thousand and one the midnight, and I was enough. I think other foxes Falcon nastier son. I don't know what was happening. Do we couldn't say with some? We gotta a batch of banana taffy from look? She was dicey. There were fire fire it there was a there was not here, not firefight, those actual finance and whole disburse. No scientists, China, China, make you laugh a little, but local, oh yeah was cool school when I, when I was oh remember well, then thing was just at the launch stay with your friends and I think that's the thing. You're always chasen as a comedian is just be in an environment where you're just making your friends laugh. You know

but I went to a class in LOS Angeles Alot of people. Don't even know that I went to a class marker comedy class class like when you see written. I guess like put in cheesy, hordes ladders, how this autumn a Strip mall outdoors, wonders I'd better, go! Apparently they work, and it was so- we had had some guy at work all in your future employment homes. He added- ass. He was sponsored by like up tat boy here, some quick oil offering out So may we were there and their clients and there was but interesting thing about the class was it was not very out an offer was here For it was an environment where you joking around, but the thing was at the end of the class you got to perform on stage at a real comedy club, so that was it and they taped it for you and it's now

but he's got take this back with a limited amount of time. Do so you had it hey baby here that Cosette, though you know, and so I remember galloping, Three minutes in your so nervous, but you had a tape and sending you felt like I'll have a piece of, now and then, after that they had a comedy room near me too. What gentlemen had half a lil and he which I'm here and part of his leg and bank, or he said he was so he could have been taken, see or somethin I don't know what his name was now mean. It was a it's is unlikely dude, but anyway, yeah. He opened up a comedy room about to box from where I was living in our lay am I went over there on wednesdays, em

and those causes rock where a move back to New Orleans and they had a comedy room there. How you make money when you're working at them in disguise is even pain. You are you pay and that here too performer you pay him a letter with rang yourself. You gotta bring people anything I'll. Bring enough. You have to pay that was part of that man is it that's a under does dirty sub culture, business of comedy or show would you say you have big I'll bring ourselves? and you gotta bring people which and if you bring Ike five people, and then ten dollars again Amazon. Then you to pay that the difference both on the fifty dollars so So this is that's where you start in comedy. That's where tat it. S really were a start and an honest man. When I started on new. I knew that I was doing pretty good at it. When I started, I knew that I could, do it. I knew that I could do it.

and then, once the lifestyle came along, where you got two scooter random be any I said I didn't have to make a real connection, which are to realise, wasn't a strong Suleiman. Really I didn't really related at that point. I didn't really realize I was evading. So then I thought I was going towards something and I think it's pro like that for a lot of us in all types of jobs, you know some the field I'm chased in its. It's, not so much something that I'm going for as if fuck and figure out. If there's something that I'm trying to be away from you I'm a nurse just for me, that's really for everybody. In the end, He'll teams were used to say light. Well, you know, if I may things get bad, you know still go on a trip you get on that plane, everything's ripe, writhings gone! No more problems are in some new place, everything's great now that was That was the deal they also whenever is happening

You know you have some guy living out here in San Diego is having problems with this. Why for his girlfriend or whatever go go on a chip? Gonna play no problems anymore. Dialogue on similar thing, evading the problems. yeah, I was- and I didn't yeah and I didn't know always doing that United didn't know and then also you're out there you have, you were able to establish brief relationship. She no one night, stand. You know a little bit of sex here and there will be a touching jerking off next to some one, not even sex, sometimes or even just jerk off by self. In wishing somebody was there which is really wanna. I mean I was by two. Three of us about humanity's lay like only one of those sounded like a relationship hang out and, like perversity, decided love me so out of no worse, you, don't you the days for maybe what let me, but if you gotta get imagination tat, you could ever he'll die right there. When you know- and I was strong role in the friggin,

Batmetal Freaking called, and I was really running for strong suit Cecil. Would you be out merely how long you out now lay for a bit? They're gonna be out there for months, and what would make you would you just run out of money? Do I gotta go back Louisiana? Yes, that would be a comfortable. I have a long term out a long term relationship for a little while, which is like the closer relations back again into is having one with a veto. Bows. the miles a space in it, and Yes, so I e and then comedy, but comedy kept doing good it. Like this thing, I look I really think it with some god that just you know, guy just wanted to keep taking care of me. You know, even though I think when I was young, I always went out trust a run on interest God entrusted anybody had like was looking out for me. What? What years is this? This problem, Two thousand. The two thousand and nine. I know about TAT,

thousand sixteen, I was saying thousand sit. So during this time, you're what's the progression once you would you do good with bring or show once you get good like ok, now, you're, almost always gotta have people come in at what point do I will put it you think of yourself, aren't I think I can live. I can make. I can pay my rent. I can get food from comedy. why I got. I got a credit card mass at what point ochre. When I got there a car boy that Delta Reserve they hit me up in the mail brought. You know, and I looked at some of the plains online- is that these people are doing well, I'm open account with them, so I went partly by thirty seven thousand dollars in debt we're probably about four years, which was allotted debt when you never have had. Three thousand dollars in a bank account so far all those years? Are you pay check to paycheck yeah dissipated, to paycheck. Maybe you have eight hundred,

in your bank account. May you got two thousand, maybe did a good show and you may be got fourteen hundred, but then you gotta by a new friggin. Whatever the next fly hors D oeuvres gets was at next flight So this is a struggle. It struggling to start. It is a struggle honestly, and I look, I know it's it's it's own struggle is the struggle. In that sense, I'm not other people have way bigger struggles but its, but the struggle part of that job at a minimum. It's a financial struggle! Yes, and you are you looking at it. Thinking well be doing this for the rest of my life like for rest, my life, I'm at a recent meeting going from town to town. Making four hundred eighty dollars. One night is at how much you make when you're one of these level comedians. Now, I think, tat if you do a feature weakened somewhere, you get paid six hundred dollars for about five shows, but you have to buy your flight. Ex three hundred eat on eighty learn at you know everything about mix, martial arts,

Besides you see when you are young, these fighters up train of thought fires, that's what they're doing here. You're going to fight in Nebraska they're gonna get paid to dollars to fight two hundred dollars if they win and flight out their cost freaking eight hundred last and they gotta pay medical for their cieca. It's a freak in a disaster. Yet again, the same thing right. It really is via they gave at the uno. Gather care either. Have to their teeth taped into their bid alibi, dicey, yes, just circuit it's that circuit. It's the circuit of that thing, and it said the boy if it's all the things that keep that our kind of nice, and especially I don't know. If people are settling down. Gettin married your friends, given real joy jobs at sea, more real on paper and These things are

want to be like everybody else. That's the thing always remember my head. I didn't want to be like a lot of people, I wanted to manage. My aim is the only thing I had was everything else in my life since my birth felt like it was like a sentence like this is, who you are, you are somebody who you know not gonna be at home, where you are really loved, your not Ino thing like that, I'm not complain. I'm just share what I felt like and some of its monitoring be real, that's a crazy party, some of this stuff it could be in your head, but if too was very real said. The old man he's still control was what I what you saw me, how ah what I was you know, and we're. Just gonna hold out to try and be sunk. Then. I don't know if I knew what it was when I was. Can hold out. So when you're, a comedian, making six hundred dollars for five shows in a weekend that you had to pay seminar

forty dollars for your ticket to get out to wherever you were the. What is making it at that time, because I think it aged and that's where I was trying to one way I'm like nowadays, you know, different avenue since social media is out there and you can use that Avenue Youtube. You can use an avenue podcast you can use. That is all these different avenues, but realigned ten years like their none. You can't make a living from tube, wasn't even a thing. He had learnt nothing so you're, just just freaking comedy loved a comedy cop. What was making it back. Then. Ok, did you get it? Did you? Did you see that as a possibility, I got a thousand I remembered it gave me three thousand did a comedy central like ten minutes or something, and I give you three three thousand dollars for comedy central. You do ten minutes, they give you three thousand dollars.

Big ass network, copies hedgerow, that's like these fight organisation, reevaluate zigzag saved egg is fighting caused. The audio comedy is this: it was like. Obviously, it was just Africa is DISA, different, Dana wider or a different organisations. You know then also they had all the eyeballs. Then they had the died. And so yes, you got the money, and then you start to get a little neuron notoriety from the deal from like you. Could show people. I really am a comedian that was the das, the scariest part as a comedian. Comedian and then do you get We will work he about it's, a real. We are paying to tell people until you have proof that you dared, because unless not you could be a participates just

I am a comedian for all pray. You happy of landmark really be averted Earls Day. I've letters you too, to be a murderer than a comedian, its own definitely man and always love people time a man. I was a kid. I love you in time. That's really not one of the best things too to talk about on the pod cast. If you want to maintain, you know yourself not being present in our recovery. Reagan pay your baby, but that's one thing need about recovery and beat on this because I have friends are flashes. Did I have friends that, if I mean I friends is gone on the devil's door dude and waited there till he opened it and say row in the devil: works overtime. Rarely see how these significant enforcement of an open that door severely Bill Miller out here does hanging on average and welcome that, so so calmly, central you got the money, and now you're kind of I mean

come come? You use it S. Also the commission's you're kind of like elevated right. You started to get elevator sort of a man yeah a little bit. You get enough that boost that. Then it tells you ok, this path is, I choose you there's, I think, there's a unique moment, indifferent pass where you're too your ear you're, putting yourself into the path and then the path is also saying: hey, you know put in its handouts and I do believe that for comedians man at a certain point, it kind of choose as you. So would you do comedy central now? Our own you're going to accommodate clubs. Are you head lining now credit you're, getting close, you start in a headline and then you get like fifteen hundred a week so that when you can start to save a little money, an arm. You're, not selling tickets, though you were just most people come there's a few people come to see. Maybe ten fifteen people, but also back then clothes had all the email is they were a gatekeeper, so they

you have all that you can start to put it together. We put the cards on the table, fill it out and like, but then you're coming before him. Do that, and I did it all man put the box with the car see. Are you do my manager, whatever like that JAMA manager that helps you through the agencies to get booked, but you don't have taken their cut yeah. They take their cut, so you're getting fifteen hundred bucks and they're taken fifteen thousand one hundred and fifty and then the age of a tycois. dear sir. Then you down a twelve there by yeah. You still grind it and are still didn't have any other. life there's only so you eat you You got me they're doing something that I want to be done or am attaching my life to other people. It may be starting a family come there is not really a ton of different things to do. You know really I mean you this So I I didn't. I didn't have anything on the other side of the coin. I didn't have any place where I felt like I could make a commitment to start a family, so I'm like well, this is this shoe. Just

so well right now how many days a year you touring at this time, I did my apology, forty eight weeks here towards our man, adored Arturo. man, I really did in summer and here's a crazy thing. There's one thing I notice about a brain or something that has has maybe issues with alcoholism. Stuff, like that. My brain forget my frame for your work forgets all that I did all that work. so my brain every day has this weird governor ran it? That's like. May you you gotta, do Sultan Yemen done anything, you know, I got this weird, and I suppose honor with some of that comes from and in those it I still want to figure out of my life. You know: where does it come from? You know some of those thing so does it, I love kind of thinking about and talk about, people about is like- We yeah, where of these weird, like.

this weird legal system that thou built in my soul, where is that? Whereas at all come from and and you figure out some the times. You can figure some of that out by talking with other people about that sort of thing, What do you feel like the prosecution and the defence? Are are arguing over with the legal system that, in your head prosecution is always just never, there was never like us a bit foundation that I'm ok. So when I don't have that than anything else has a really good chance, eventful trade in and get really into me back There never was this. I got a friend one time. We just text me that a May you're- ok, you know just out of the blue because he knows you, we talked about studies and recovery and manage judges. Hit me

Never in my life had I just heard that are in it. Just came through in a certain way were hurried out like a man, and just I'm just like. Paul, I'm just like what thing just when you don't have that we had that foundation of that anybody just telling you that or the worlds are just like you feel in it. You know, then you feel somehow you always will feel susceptible to any other. what then of course you to build your own, thing in your head? It's like you, gotta get going you gotta get. You got to pull yourself by the bootstraps you so you do that, but then after you do and well even that thing still going on childhood system you put in their bitches loose dude and that better, There is, but one party has got TAT did say in his turn. Again, this doesn't there's no control, but that thing has been with you for so long. That is hard to get in systems in place to stop those survival. Things because something had to be in my head to tell me to keep going. You know well but, as you get odors it

still running on the same childhoods system, the same original dos or whatever Microsoft Dawson, Sir, did, you ever have a point where you're like in friggin, whatever state New York. You just performed in front of seven people that were talking while Europe on stage and then had to pay the money right? I know what I'm gonna get a job and making these did you hear that out or another layer forgot a dove Darwin Taco Salem mexican food? Being and I'd sold all kind of food, a peep of a restaurant and stuff, like that. I used to sell us all Mexicans the people when I was younger too did you ever have a point where you were like the ugly one at that point was a point while gave up. Oh you gave up on comedy at some point. You had this girl who was in his long term relationship and I went back to New Orleans and worked at a bar and we would sell a mexican food to people.

Of border with legal shit and and they had margarita machine in there now work in that bad boy in Ireland is doing what I could. And then I have some guy came man who work next door and he said like one thing to me and I just sat me off like truth like a chump or something. Treating me like. I was somebody they did in. It was like some rich do some rich. You no second hand duration, Richard third hand, generation rich, you know body look I'll, say: there's somebody in their family probably add some cotton on a guy. Every. How is more of a polyester bad boy, don't say- and I was one of those Zander synthetic fabrics, ok, racism, free, daddy, ok, this dirty said something yeah niches and opened his

only partially own the place. It was our business next door. This all wine, like review, would ever gotten image jerry, be telling people to fuckin sell their home asleep under your need. All of this I am- and I do was raised on a day of wine. Wind farm is added a pocket Zander Hoddan Grapes and his ass and freezing graves and Buckingham in his eyes and he's telling people had struggled there that God, how does Violet O day of dude? Oh, you still have silverware Youse, flock and sell. It shows up like hugged dude, the guy candy, because nobody get food is now the guy's mocking just knuckle enthuse out are not lenders and will we amazing is like no worries me. Seventy six dollars last night and he hung exhibit and they need your eyes off in the valley. Just say it, and there are no part their winter has again I endured

any hogs only sought to Christmas where'd, you didn't need from last year and there together, but anyway ATO and look man better use of Luxembourg work. You're. Sorry, the videos are now saying that guy's, not a smart guy videos, though, and the guy I grew up well off. We're ah, I think he actually did grow up well off. That's part of his lion! No, you! U partially line is not really line. If you don't know, but he what's he Cooper there is that old, like a corner lake restore or something- and he did you know he got after created the money wrote a core liquor store in his name. Was our wine or at the head of heavy from the walls, was back to hell yeah like big dive, Legatee.

slang in that riesling. So there's rich dude comes in. He says something you he said something in that night I broke the margarita Machina set that bitch on and broke it and are needed, Carson PAL about six hundred and I was it an outing go back there, man and then I went back to allay and I was content yeah I didn't want to be rude, yeah in committee. The relationship I was in others went back to Hell. I, and so Then things like, I started what happened? Member, I started picking up the esteem and that's when pod some podcasting started an arm. I just was really fortunate man. You know my producer Nick Davis, who is a great idea, huge fanny yours, and so you are gracious to come on in Rogan. Had me on his part has at the same time and couple of other little things happen where suddenly a kind of had a fan base. I don't move towards much space and between didn't Netflix special. They didn't do anything. Then we will came out

first the Netflix application? Nothing came out, but it don't really matter. No one really notices wouldn't would not the man I was so excited. I remember I went to Chattanooga Mall fired up and I'm thing is going to be man and it was a small- was even a big club and there was nine people in there so when stuff like that happens, that's gonna be tough to power. Through I mean when your isp They work everything you said so far tonight about the one people after an approval in all the stuff in huge elixir, Netflix peace, and this was. Echo. What do you say to facilitating echo you up Are you out of your life love our years? Painful, always painful.

Painful here the crazy thing about paying for man where most of what you know your life feels like painful, then I think shit like that. Just kind of fuckin fits on the shore, so how are you? How are you so for other people right Other people are having their Chattanooga experience where nine people show up there haven't you know whatever happens in your life. What did you do? another thing when you talk about Gary V and I've people assess this about me. Two causes that hard work, hard work, hard work, and I just have this conversation with some of the other day. They, like you know, thereby my company, hard work, doesn't necessarily mean you get promoted, I'm like that's true everywhere, hard work, necessary. Like you can't just expect arms can work hard work, hard work hard and that these things are just gonna happen. If that, if it was, I hate to say, if it was that easy, I have a lot more. People do not have to hard work, but a lot of people would do it alone. if we start work in our, but you gotta have

I'm sure you ve seen comedians along the way that were really hard already near there to have another nineteen jokes Nyc and you read em and they all suck right. So when you get down with his net special you're. All Anthea expectations are so high. You show there's no one there, how do you are you power through that? How do you get three we do made over this? the girl. I remember that How can we get some like some a little bit more than thick girls, making out ok I mean that's how affair you pay may be from the islands or whatever. So you have it. I mean it's like Africa. Did our remember yeah? Well, that was indeed I wasn't it simply more calmly clubs, its comical just a bar tomorrow to a stage so it's like. Then there was always a coupled. You could always get a couple of drinks at the end of the night, to kind of say she self- and I was never a big drink out- have maybe to drink. You know, but but After that I dont know, I started to get

I dont know really what happened. I just knew that that was in it that highly oh somebody wrote an article. Our members right will must special came out, and it said like of this, would be Donald Trump favorite comedian herself. It was like a negative. It was, I think it was right round the time, maybe when some of that kind hitting restart your son and it was and a lot of my stuff is sarcasm like a character. Also, it's me, but it's also this it's a caricature of where you're from right right rise, a mix, railroad and it may be really not trust any of, like Hollywood tabloids any that kind of shit. So and it just was so debilitating, you work so hard, and somebody just does something- this completely errant an aimless. You know when you watch your own Netflix special. Will you like

oh, you can like damn only neutral, I fell, ok about it. I felt like I went to faster in the material I felt like I was probably le nervous and went too fast so. I never really looked back on it super fondling by but then adapt. when things are to evolve and some pie cast started going from my perspective, so, You know who this is its form because, as I was like reading about your background and trying to figure out- because I thought you just like everybody thinks I thought- oh he just made famous overnight or whatever kind of, and I didn't, as I read persons echoed this dude men doing comedy for like whatever too gator along tat. So long years and it was a video was freak honor. Little video that you made units are not free to do with that bus yeah yeah here,

a greyhound do year. We just had a greyhound drive on the park. Ass Mank Isley go around all the time. I got one somebody frickin like you want to see some and it's always there, Dick you don't say Amber huts. I come on roads, I'm so these policies dig out of a hat. He now, but I can't even get your dick, you know. Doesn't rabbit. Does a lot of really shit magicians man I ever saw I saw that vision and it just I was dying, laugh and are going to share it with all my friends, because every one kind of legs Emma may- and here you are talking about you- know I never in a kind of my generation did went on greyhound right. We can do our own think about any in Italian. you'd like no one takes public transit. Now it's different across the country, man, you ve been a greyhound station or

you seen some you know you, you ve seen shit man in your life. Have you been doing? I saw lady drinking a can of but he beat formula dared. Last year you said that on a video I didn't see the lad was. I thought it was some kind of you to make a Google it man so soon. Did that you go on Rogan for the first time, and this is what I want to say. Is that win you had like, or you have, and still have like, like for of vulnerability and honesty about yourself that I think is really different, and I think that that is what my peep make makes people may mean a first I'm her jaws, like oh yeah, he's not he's.

exposing himself. You know not is not in the way that you friends do whatever the flattery you're hanging out with, but expose yourself that hanging we're on our way on a text I got, you know simple Yes, so I think that was a huge thing that I think p a lot People connected as soon as they gonna hurt you and heard you talking to Joe and Freakin Joe and obviously his his park ass, so massive in any such. Guy and neither was telling everyone oh yeah, this guy's lerius, I mean armoury too. I think he told me tat. He did he was I drove outcries prick in all areas. no. I like a duty abusing this symbol, act being or whatever ever brought it up here. Various, so so did When did you start your part, gas, story, I did a park ass with a friend for about probably two years. That was about more like interview and people that was in Hollywood. My framework, the DMZ and we try to podcast together,

farm allowing it to be myself. I like even more interview- and you know I don't really like that as much and so then what that one day I walked out a rogue ins, and I said, do something more like that? I didn't know that that's all the guy new until I was there and hands on in the environment that that's the way you could do it even by listening, I didn't get the concept a hundred per cent. I walked Arizona and do some more like that is. I just started started when, in my kitchen, undistorted kind of talking about stuff and things that I was thinking about, an awe. and here and it's been yeah, it's better. It's been a place sometimes were a share, maybe more than I should to mountain. I don't realize it. It's been a lot of different things. Man. Sometimes it is but a blessing cause. It's the it's like the thing tat keeps me going each week. It's like a guaranteed there,

You know the longest relation of animal life and houses with my pockets and a lot of ways is the one thing that I'll show up for every week. Even. Yvonne Times. I noticed. I don't feel good like the past. Maybe two years I haven't felt really good something cuz. I think physically kind of I don't know what it is. I'm doing like a lot of blood work and doing all these different therapies in like trying to kind of figure out. Why don't feel as good as I used to physically? Don't feel good? the hardest things, houses wino, feel good to go in up into an environment and put yourself out it's like you. want to hide from people. You feel you want awaits. You feel ok to get out there and, like you know, That's been one of the most challenging things is on week's rod. Dont really feel that great to put myself output myself right there, you just somebody like man. I want to see people to see me not at my best, especially when

the only thing I have always had as my own image. How you see me as like it. It makes it real, dicey, sometimes, but at the same time, man I've learned a lot about people through podcasting, I'm just enamored some of the people that come out and the sweet, the police nice stories that they share. You know and then people will share stuck with me. That means some to them, sometimes like some, not countenance more at the cafe and said a man I got five you're, so Reno you just so excited when you see how somebody's life gets different are better and not that anything to do it that I don't feel like I do, but just that he must share that with me and then he feels ok share in it. You know things like tat. Man is that's one thing? I've learned nothing to. Pakistan is really a power in kind of.

Even though is not real human connection is not the hand to hand combat of of human connection, but as worth through microphones stuff. It's been surprising to me how many people connect Gina and how many people feel and how much feeling you can get through stuff. It's it's pretty Mark will sometimes so anyway. I don't really know in talking about, but it's interesting as you were made it no you're joking around earlier about how you know- you're sorry, lobbying Money right now on his part, castors boss and that's, that's interesting about that. Is you You have some pretty serious after you do on your part, ass. You have some. You know you gonna. Sometimes you When up about stuff and how you feeling and maybe not feeling that good and again I think that people tune into that because look man, if I guess I guess,

Yes, you could try, unlike fake being funny or fake being in a good mood, but I I don't think you can really fake it. A hundred percent would be really believe it and I think it's that. You just be who you are and in the if you got something not if you feel like frequent rest, your whatever than you like, hey this one I feel like right now and it makes people com bull that there's someone like you, whose usually funny and had seems, have a pretty good life and all those other like hey man. This is pretty hard right now, for whatever reason, whatever that reason right might be an I think when people. Just knowing that someone else is kind of like their wisdom, its roots reassure you. And any other thing that's interesting about this: is you ve been saying this whole time? You know that you have a hard time with relationships and long term in all this, but how long you been in your password for me, the ears, so five years and

The thing the thing about- and I have the same thing where I meet people- that the bar guest and they You'll like we have a relationship here and there right right, because you don't get you don't you I mean my part gases. Three four five hours lost she's now ass. He would have any of you said things rather years ago, and it is just that we take we get about creep How often you sit down and talk to anyone for three one or two: I walked out of the euro and I remember Thomas it hey that's a long conversation. I've ever had my life with anybody is with a man like I didn't have any mail figured I'd get over. There was no male thing My neighbour one got shot up a ready made twenty Brower clinic, and that was like the tough. As do we knew you know, and he was on pale, so he wasn't really doing it out of his own heart. So

You know we didn't have a lot of so I thank you I've found more, probably male influences through podcasting, in anywhere else in my life, really, which is kind of interesting. You know and some of the young, opaque, hasn't powerful inheres wanting us need to Jago is mostly meet people who I would like to meet anyway. It's like gotta came to me this morning. I would like to meet him in. You know like he was people's like I did read some reality. Tat was when I was younger. You know fro a couple years on tv and I wouldn't meet people that that, then is the noisy about me. Just people see you. And that was just there was nothing to it. That meant anything really so to meet people. You

Do they know you someone and you, so you would have some common ground. You know, that's really, nice, almost that's one thing. Interesting man, I feel it. God has given me this weird way worth like he. He always trying to show me that people care about me. You know because I think for so long I didn't feel like anybody did. You know what I was real real young. I'm not complain. You know Unama complaining about it, I'm not! I don't need any self pity I mean like that, but I do think it's fascinating in hell, You know he ll send people in every. You know every now and then somebody say somethin, I just something like it. Slow healing of this space taught me that was just has been uncomfortable for a long time. You know, and so is powerful. Stop like that going on. You know so an and in some other can do that for other people. You know

a friend of mine, the military. I think his dad had some well a patient. How am I talking shop, yeah. I just I don't know I don't know man. I'm enjoying being alive these days a lot more cuz. I want to see what else can unfold. You know, and I don't have always felt like that. As a kid I felt like more like everyday was a battle you know where is now I'm like man, Everett, there's, there's a lot of good stuff out there, and I can be a part of it, whether it for me or somebody else. If I can just do my best, take care of myself and keep myself how to win every day but dude. If I can just show up and get a strong tie dog, you know what I'm saying if I can even fucking Tippah judge Famu no problem paying Doug and That darting w did you know that it's possible and almost dare until one the lost honestly, no homo by speaking of

Fighting what about Jujitsu, where you out, wanna play about to have much out is kept in, hurt so bad who? U turn with man. You gotta get find somebody. That's gonna, be a little bit more relaxed monitoring, which date on train with local his brow today, and I was when stripe White built man and light? hell. I left as I've been found park and do so that's why you're going to have been taken a lotta yoga, because someone was not flexibility and- and I kept getting hurt so bad like for me anyway. I couldn't like I used to do we'll get ready, we just take the Netflix special is coming out in October this I'm proud about. I fell excited. This one is more of a reflection. I feel like I've just more of a confident me as a comedian. You know so? What will what goes into? What goes into that? does it take to get ready, hoo hoo contacts you like what's happening, if I, if, if

Charles, was gonna. Do a Netflix special. What would it look like? How long would it only we already know it bears out real advantage to be from New York by Probably do yes, something! Maybe tropical you know. Maybe some ocean sounds in the back. You know maybe get that Vietnamese got to go by drinking, that cranberry on the skateboard. You know I'll it kind of you know, maybe slightly urban. You know, maybe somebody playing you know. Maybe a dog up near a chain link fence in the back and they can't others I would saying do not enjoy. That does not want in a strong saying, very powerful, its kind Joel, but for people instead stood in the rain, Herodias crazy law. Would you, Netflix

You gotta now the special common out. So this is what asked one. Maybe you say you didn't feel hundred percent on this one if you're gonna percent this, when I feel that what made you feel, but what may how'd you prepare for it one thing I did stop doing what you just because I kept my kept getting cracked, so I was just I mean dude, you couldn't do any yoga. So when I don't do physical things to take care of myself, I start mentally feeling. Bad which, by the way, a key point for everybody. You just heard it from Theo. If you, if you can physical stuff. You can start feeling bad mentally facts. So go do physical stuff. You have to and it's not even fair for me anymore, to evaluate myself. Sometimes if I haven't been physically active because I'm not giving myself a fair chance really, you know I have to be able to take care of myself we'll have to be- ought to be thinking with a brain. That's you know healthy. So, yes, notice anyway, they gave us a budget and we made an wanted tat. I wanted to do one raw felt like this one

he's gonna. Do I'm gonna do right and I got to hire the production of production company a and I've gotten through the editing more and has been tedious but the months before it. I had a yogurt doktor coming to my home every couple of days. Always do I had trainer I'd await trainer. I was doing a lot of at stake here myself. You know, ah said the word. You dig the material, material I had about six years to get some go material, the harbor, was covert. It was so fresh. Twenty nineteen, the material was ready to go. You know it was just like a damn I mean it was really the second MA am newborn a strong newborn. You don't say it whenever an elbow cross out, you know where they can affect and go in the kind of baby that beats Mama like this thing was ready to go. This thing was ten months in this.

The things I go to me and then covered. He had seen a covert hit. So then you have all these downtime side move to Nashville and by about a home in Nashville again stage was still open, so still go and keep this material fresh off. Ah in there I did a couple weeks and allay because there's a lot of stage time they're about six weeks ago, when there for a few weeks and got it ready and then put it down and put it out in Nashville, and it was great moment like six thousand people came out and that massive for comedy, isn't. It is pretty good three shows of two thousand the around you, otherwise it would be too big. This value is just kind of real, perfect enough, the Rhine and over there, and yet so it was good manner. and it was good, and I found myself more the editing, you know, seen a lot of the ropes now I know when I can assert myself and

Don't do it that wealth and allow them too aggressive record all the shows- the first one was so bad. It was like people were happily we to set that literally look like pedophiles like a petticoat open, a candy shop. Do that I was ok languages. purpose the question and you didn't say anything: you know you could listen. Man in people like a nice guy is just joking baby, I got there. I was so angry. When I saw the set, because I didn't make it somebody had paid somebody may lose. The goal of this was supposed to the back of the Rhine and as these beautiful windows and we want to make windows on stage is colorful kind of church. Turkey charging a windows,

a man we didn't do it did you? Did they changed that night God Gingerbread House do for John Wayne, Daisy like as if he had entered us as we G Baden, be house gods ass for her work and got busted, envy did say and if he did it but it was so bad even the next day the guy came. We call him with a get these fucking things out of here, took one of the ways it threw it out of the over the railing outside piece of shit. I mean He could make emerald like kids school thing so, the next time we just went with a flat curtain, rods, hurtin, and operator. The stages is a little interesting had never done that kind of surprises answer to take their reflect and off the stay so to give us a better lighting out better lighting opportunities, and then they record them all according to Malta, and then you, depending on which now

you? Did the best might take a chunk from here in a jump from their rights? Pretty much, are you put it together it pretty much. Can't we just did like two thirds from one show wonder from another. The crowd was much better. The second night we had to get the tell the people have security. You know just have some. Can all over the audience and people wanted to be helpful. You know, and also the Netflix hit us a couple before said everybody has to have a task, or you know, whatever p p c aria. So that was an grateful everybody that came out whether they got a task made a fate car wherever they how they did it people and got the test man and adjusts it's so nice You know it just it. Justice is just so nice to go. Spend an extra half hour the day before you're gonna go to a show could to go and do something because you care enough MA am

yeah. Well, that's all some one is I come out. It'll come on October man- and I want to say out, for I forget man, my friend Josh Colt- is in A5. Seven engineer, Battalion Term Kirby work, here. The commander these in Kuwait in there, like organ indifferent bases up right now and We got two families out of rabbits want to tell him I'm proud of him, and thank God I think that old group for the servicing and thank all you guys who just Can't you have two who can be with your loved ones? You know, as I know they miss you and thank you run honor. Gas is called this past week This past weekend, yeah we got it's always nice man, it's been a blessing in this whole. Yellow universe is a blessing,

he's coming through those dives. You brought in as that's my wife and daughter broke. I want you to get all of it occurs because you mention Euphrasie Voice at a paranoid about get murdered. you're gonna go up let me add, a very they arrive, as do you did? I will stay far away from their then nobody that no beautiful Ladys with nice to see you I love you and it was just nice to see a little party or life man. It made me feel, is inspiring. You know when I see people, do in the things that are like seem like the hardest thing for me to do to build from our future psych. Every time you see to like it GIS it makes things feel a bit more. Feasible or that I know if I need help can. I ask you or I can ask other people that are no care, so it was. It was nice upridged, common now worlds there feasible pose great show. I appreciate you being out their pressure. You make an emerald laugh

I can already see we're gonna have to do this again. We have a little bit more time, Yellin Low Thomas. I have to go and five hours next time, but would have New Donald. I don't know, but we got the love to talk more about this stuff and talk more about other things. hopefully out some words of Eu J training. When I come back so thou, be some nice to talk about all summer get you out of your brother echoed thank you nice to meet you brother, you too! Well, you said it. The in height, You mention her like your run into people in your actually have like a little bit of a connection with him is. Do you think that, like an hour, you share stuff openly more than a lot? he bore think? Do you think that that is an indicator that you'd doing the right thing because sometimes they, okay, so if you're in the public light and people will approach you whatever, I think, sometimes

they can like misrepresent who you are there, like? Oh yeah, maybe like they feel like. They know you that a pop guess all the stuff and then when they were the things they say or or they treated like relate to your whatever the like they're just way off a lot of time. I think, not necessarily might sometimes it could be. You know, but the fact that like a random, couldn't go random. Stranger can come up to you and then you guys can relate like on a significant like and deep Why is it so quickly? Get there? That's one ass, an eighty I mean you could have a moment where you're having a real moment with somebody like a moment that makes you feel something Assad yourself. You know and then real, that that to me comes from somewhere else, the it always like. You always do. me as someone who's like so authentic, and I think that that that is a big indicator that you doing the right thing if he can really like relate to people who you never met before that quickly Yeah thanks man, just a thing for sphere, so disk,

a lot of it so new to me feeling connection, and so it's fuckin like being on a bridge at shakes. You know would you call that in you know, we usually call them bridge, the ship had ever really say. That's how technical telling people believe in ok, but you for me, a lot of that stuff is just a late hour. late bloomer in a lot of, like kind of I think emotional kind of ways honestly, And I'm not ashamed of it or anything like that. You know but I was in a world where you want to be tougher. You know is: is it feels it feels tough, sometimes learn later in life, but yeah. it's nice, and sometimes I don't know what roll God is using me for you know you know about it, wanna try keep myself the best in the

swear that I can't so he can use me for the best. You know like. and our relief, I really believe that you know, and I don't mean it in a way like him, some kind of hero, anything I just I can take care- must have well. I believe- and I believe, as for anybody, that hake that we are your higher power. Doesn't it whatever your higher power is, can use you for good. You know and we need more good out there and we need each other. You know anyway. Fuckin weirdos just like a weirdo congress- ok, sorry, you know that only the echoes spot on it's kind of a kind of minutes, war or raw forces what I was saying earlier. I think the reason you're popular right now is because you reveal yourself because your open and I think, people beer your person and I think people to that end, and I think it's because I think it allows people to connect to themselves. So I say keep doing what

you and Theo VON appreciated man, and I appreciate you guys have me man. I really do it's good. It's made me feel excited like I'm doing the right thing right on brother and Levi, and with that Mister The overall has left the building. He had to go back planning on my part II had a tight window I sure got him here earlier. Didn't did make that adjustments. We had a bail but we're back. His verdict. Come back seem like we're just gonna gettin into some good stuff. You know with that it is good that Theo is, you know, he's on the path we work in trying to get. trying to be better: try to stay on the path, sober, clean fitness, We talk about yoga like the whole nine yards, some self assessment, On self assessment happening, there are some good stuff in their action

Then he just sorted like mentioned here, and I will do it with you. We could talk or eighty one internet privacy, but there's when he mentioned that the thing about beer behaviour in your passions like yours, my thoughts and actions. Yes, your actions lead your thoughts. thought the other way around doesnt does, I would say, if I was assess that statement. I agree. Your actions can lead to your thoughts. I would say more often than your thoughts led to actions because, let's face it, gonna have so far to come up with what when do you, but there's a huge, huge space between having a thought and taking action. Close up that space, we made a lot better position. Yeah he in it felt like is top motherly, were specific like like, basically its essentially like take action.

You know the rather than just going around in your head and TIM Ferris. I think yet inverse said that You were essentially the different way to say buddy same thing is: let's get out of your head in, inter by he met and TIM mention that if we around like getting out of depression, but then Theo was as if he's not physically moving and doing work. Physically, he's gonna be in a bad placement. so yeah you're right decision same thing seemed gigs for sure Unless it's a lot of stuff. Yes, we can follow up on the we can follow up on with you, and I will be looking forward to that unless, in the meantime, we're on this path together at length. I feel I get a few like we're all sworder. Will we look up. We see other people on the path with us, good few good feeling, sort of students and thinking about.

These ok see you when you create a Jackal fuel use. essentially made the path. Pretty luxurious. Cause go when you think about like how it was verses, how it is now right, yeah, ok, I mean yes All right, maybe luxurious is not my favorite word. No. I know you may have a lingering in your brain from the oven being on workers there. He and I had a conversation on his part cast about luxury days right, ok, so that the way to put it as far as are you called it, one, Capital is efficient, efficiency is exactly right, like it's kind of like the logistics part. of a battle were worth something where its egg Oh yeah, you want these cool new shoes that comfort your feet or whatever, but first come. I think a but you like now it's not that I need to be coddled. My feet like me,

Peter in good shape, can do a lot more running. Lama rocking were marching Suzanne, so your eat guided took that approach to the path you'll be more efficient, even though, technically speaking, to support your perspective. If you have goods and good boots for rocking, they are technically will make you more efficient and in some way that is somewhat luxurious compared to a piece of junk boots at her feet or bare feet. Even Dale but one could think of it in terms of all this gonna. These bare feet is gonna. Make my feet tougher. When you say one could think of it. Is that cousin, high school there, their town you shouldn't use,

you the proverbial sentence, it sure yeah. I think I got it from fight club actually to be honest or waiting for this. I think he said on the plane is a one could make all types of explosives using ordinary household items and another guess it really. If one were so unkind, So? It's like I'm not saying me, I'm saying me, but I'm not saying it's interesting. That's where Yorkers I went to college and I studied the English in college and you you aren't supposed. You are post to say this. You should do this. Are you sure? you are supposed to say, one should save. One is posters, so great honour to me. It's the language, evolves yes, of ours and everywhere evolving to appoint, and I think I evolve to a point where I say you right- and I mean you you

Yes in the in the that's actually go. I'm ok, that's kind of a good point in general, because an e, a method for where it's, it's baffling, how good weakened but when you think about this all kind of the words you say the tone body language, all like all the stuff is all command a certain message. So if you're like hate you, I'll tell you what you should do is do this and then this kind of, like thing you imply when you say you, You don't really mean you should do this. You mean wine. a person should do this or whatever, and I know that. But if I dont know that public, Tell me what I should you know. What I should do is others are you have? You spoke reechoed Charles, have a really good point and that's why the english language, technically in the highest level you should be. I should be saying one should be saying one instead of you. So if we

I know he's alright he's right there at the gate it up anyway, if you're on the path with you know whether you with somebody on the path or by yourself or you feel like you're by yourself. It's not always going to be easy. making more efficient, we're gonna decrease the beatings increase their recovery, so we can maximize gains best work and put it at this point. Gains will see sir. The sole modern, English okay, so in muscle building you have the cattle state Ds Mean Airlines. Have the anabolic state Balikh. Essentially these lead to it, but is the breakdown muscle rest, nutrition, induces and anabolic state? upside. We want to maximize anabolic state law on this path. Catabolic birth. This is well but that Trance,

the transition from cat about anabolic. We want that to be the luxury we want that to be the efficient part of it. Am I right catabolic, nobody anabolic. Health is bad. Ok, it was funny going one web tunes worry when he would you hungry, be he'd, be locked do we need to go? Get some food of gold catabolic right on one of those? That's. Why said it relieved? The dagger, either way you got some suffer. You ain't so dark view somewhat this when the energy drink new era, new era energy drink. We no longer have to pay a price for it. enjoying energy drinks, positivity good taste, Dame positive! gives you the booth. Mental armed basically has been positive, and you more healthy, positive. It's a health drink, that's you have something, has no downside? No doubt would you A crazy no

really everything has a trade off here. No trade off right, just put pure upside pure, appear upside Catholics. seven sashimi, pure upside upset this good good for you, you're, better off that reveal the whole year upside. So yes in the can Mango Hawkins my opinion. Ok I'll, admit, mangoes the best one straight up factually factually my opinion. where they were also free, joint stuff. You you don't have to worry about your joint joint Wherefer Super crude oil. Also vitamin d in cold weather, for you, immunity, solar Do you consider that these things are taking care of on this path? You are more efficient, more healthy, more efficient metaphysical. And as you know, we point out. These are things you don't have to worry about I don't want anything about your George. You don't want to think about getting sick leave is do you want.

I have to be handled handle handle it does handle it. That's hoarser, strew, also speaking to anabolic protein programme nutrition profile of gains as it were so mark a disability in the form of a dessert another one of these up win, win win scenarios are those that upside taste. Good. All of us today is a good example, is good good for you just across the board. Jackie right, don't forget about Jacobite t. If you don T, oh gee or your radio lifting deadly thing is Oh, yes, you can get all these things at the vitamin shop James. You can get it while of course, and also everything is on chuckle few dot com. if you want to. If you want to start a house all the time without having to think about it, if you want that taken care of seafood scribe daddy these things, then we'll ship your house for free, which is amazing, anymore

Not being seem amazing in this day and age, because there's some really big companies world that do this, but it is amazing that you could without ever thinking about it again, have super krill oil, Moloch, joint warfare, discipline go shown up jobs. You never thought about it again. You know it just happened. What a miracle toward an amazing thing subscribe and life is full of these little met miracles from time to time. Speaking miracles, origin, USA, Marquis made stuff, what is this stuff? A lot of stuff is jujitsu, stuff or made America yes guards. The genes Gooch compression stuff origin, USA, Dotcom go there all the stuff on. There is American made from the cart in that's grown up until the final product.

That's a miracle to that in this day and age, it is a miracle industry. It is a miracle to put something on your body. That is one hundred percent without compromise made in America and is the best thing you could possibly by anyways part about upside, get the best gear support him. Support american workers- is applied across the board. Would work on big time up That's what we're doing. No downside! You speak upside, so I do have my first pair of delta, sixty genes finally realize? Yes, oh here's what that did with the Euro INA, how like he would call when built been up in your mind. Finally, when it comes to have this, you know it didn't measure up. Where did it not? You have high expectations. Care so did immeasurably think it did. They do measure up. In fact, they more than measure up, because you know, you say? Ok, they can have a stretch to cool, they have a stretch. but we're not since that are really have any stretching genes or any genes with a start.

I don't really know that even means one. I put him on it's nice, good if in fact, it's hard to go back now. Oh there is no going back some samia, so yeah dank impressive. I didn't know so much could go into Jai. Nuth stuff goes into jeez understand what we're does Eu Qatar to understand? How much better something could be? Yes is hard to imagine. If you don't know You just don't know. Reed is hard to imagine how much better they can be than a normal virgin spear and again to be made in America with american cotton. You an american buttons american hands as american hands fierce organ USA account of the spot rather also chocolates, called Jacko Store, so you go to drugstore dot com, and this is where you can get.

and the more interesting way too, to properly convey the cool stuff you can get. But at the end of the day and asking you t, shirts, hats hoodies that represent the path. Does the best way to put it does clinical freedom good, take the high ground or the high ground will take you. Some good That's what I'm sure there's a yes or a subscriber this contest and we also some some other s- got Jacko unravelling with Darrell Cooper. We get the grounded, podcast read the Warrior kid podcast Theo Van has upon cast check it out. It's called this past weekend and he talks about stuff and its both funny. And revealing and could help you like listening to it so check that one out we're carry we're talking during the worth deal has. This is pretty unique

quality about em, where he's like funny, but he so authentic and open about that. Even not so funny parts You know, and I think some people will try to do this and will try to like critical pull it off, but they lack the full, often hicity. So they try and pull off the authenticity, yes and which is kind of a woody call. It catch twenty two like if you're, trying to pull off and pissy, that's not in and of itself makes it out of it exactly right, but feels like naturally, would seem snatch likely that naturally, authentic person is sounds like from what you're saying, though he wasn't always like tat, and he had a sort of open up about it over time ok so in this war, we're talking about where a lot of times where, if you have the bean funny to people legitimately, is It's kinda, like a superpower like you can say, ITALY is still one of the best feelings onto a person. Make em laugh ready.

One of the best feelings you can ever have is like a laughing legitimately in you have- that is a superpower you'd so funny person. So a lot of you, whether they have like internal issues or not. That starts to become the front running. Quality Were there always pushing that forward? You know they're, always leading with that, leading with that and its successful. Meanwhile, the their stuff on the inside- gets protected. You know anytime soon feels awkward rainy stand. Sums feels vulnerable even scared, or what are anything but they dont like making just boom and bus out the comedy and they'll be protected facto Gonna pay off from they will just be protect. You know but after a while, the stuff on the inside becomes more and more sensitive, you know worthless if even if its expose this much set pool their reaction little bit, alot stronger but Theo does a good job, been like opening up and exposing not a little bit and at the

there's an audience why, from speaking for myself, is kind of like you just like him more You know he's a very like ballgame. He parted reasonably like boys, because he is like that. Like what you're saying any even the last night I went saw him do his dua, a common stand up routine that words cop. What I'll do it? Edward school. You could see he's not he's he's real up there, like you say something like I know, I'm sorry, I don't know what I'm saying is that a couple times that aim is you know what I'm talking about whether he did at a couple times you ok well, at least we know they were given the real, a real person yell. I had just a big memorize script that Juno, where it all a big front right. We want the front, like a lot of them, you just talking with your friend and you go off on some tangent or something that's the kind of stuff you're going to say to your friend. You know

friends behind closed doors. You know, just like in little environment, glass sometime, not an old. I'm talking to you know he's like so open with that, and I do mean opium like he's like making this cure Effort be opium animals? Not just anatomy is like yes, Our government has spent some time with them and definitely a really good authentic. Nice funny Guy men like MILAN, God he was able to come off You know another park ass. If there is out there is called Jacko Underground outcome, This is the one where, in the event of agencies happening where the those crazy earth for this reason, the world's Gill, already right now, let's get crazy and they start I don't know, maybe they start injecting advertisements into the middle of this part gas to restart. May they start banning, of this park ass to what they're going to do

I do know this right now, rules being critical to us, but I come a time when there were they say: hey, we don't want you to do that, are weak. You can follow our rules, so we have tendency. In any event that if that happens, we have a place to go Jack, underground, dot com where building it if you want to join it, you gotta Jackal around our come the cost dollars. Eighteen sends a month and for that price. You give us all a little bit of security in case the contingencies com. It's like an insurance policy against podcast Paca lift up comes a lot of progress and we are going to have to list North Africa what about a friggin mattress? seven minutes. We're not gonna. Put you into that Pakistan, leaped over to be there just doing. What we're doing we appreciate that if you can't afford that- and you still want to be a supporter you can,

Assistance at Jack, Wunderground, dot com there, where you can get you can get it to the underground, which is where you want to be really Youtube channel to buy the way strip verified by the way, video version of pocketing what you would feel looks like. If you don't know, I think a lot of us already know. But if you don't know phone, you can see that video podcast, is increasingly becoming kyoto. where did you talk to watch? Listen tobacco we have to tell for that is called Jackal Progress is the name of the Youtube to correct, correct origin USA also has one view ass. He was going on behind the scenes up. There are some other album believe it or not is almost like. I made an album, you made it. We we may like to blame. You gonna made it. I just taught you

anyways. If you want to get through, maybe a temporary moment of weakness, you can press play on your mp3 player of choice. You can listen to psychological warfare. Give you little boost given will help get through that. Thank you so good way to support foot side canvas. You hang something only wall, a graphic image that says good. By the way you can go and buy a fake one from you know. One of these various places very state pledges shocking. They have the whole good thing right now they sell it on a t shirt. They settled on a print and animals out there. I'm done with them. Plural because there's a lot of you yet is weird super. Why a lot of times? Those though you can all you gotta, do think for one second, this thing for one second life would do really felt this. You know and then call it. This makes very little sent us here saying it's easy to see through the the fight.

all you gotta do is plus for one second, and you can see Iraq what you say now we see your job go willing, motivational, sure, ok, Evans, prettier row, I never thought about where I left. There is something in there on these lake either if you're going to whatever freakin dot net. may you never heard of, but it's like engineer of to her son, that you ve heard of like that made that sell them various tee shirts, posters and whatnot, not yet the only jocose, shirts official. the only placing enemies, Dacosta they'll, come again. Think of one single other play seeking anymore. If you come into victory, I'm a man fitness one here to ask her, so so check that out and if you want to hang on a wall like up like a picture poster Dakota Meyer diseases His company man, Footsore, gave us dot. Com, go check that outcome, Hank some cool stuff on your wall

It's got a bunch of books, final spin, on what we're, not even sure. I'm not even sure you don't you. Put something out there in the world. You don't want their reaction reaction of the world's gonna, which might be good, might be bad so far, we're doing pretty good dab, dab, dab, she's, she's, Jews moved was put it to you that we find a span. I got that, but out leadership, charging tax field manual, Decode, the evaluation of Protocol, displeased with freedom field Manual, waiting you could want to free and forget the book for the kids that you know just get him on the path. Making the dragons. If there's a little kid, you know get them that book about. by hackers emerald afford on the new version and extremely and an economy of leadership and a roadmap brotherly ban. We also Islam front, the leadership. Solvency and we solve problems through leadership, gotta echelon, front dot, com-

details on that. You can also come to one of our life events. We have the muster. We have feel training exercise. We have ye, have battlefield. The next monsters in LAS Vegas its October, twenty eight and twenty ninth. So if you want to come here, get out, we will see their wares. Have an on line. Training situation extreme ownership academy online leaders course. We just we just recorded a bunch of new leaders of courses. Subject, let's go to the gym manual, good you can shape one day in the jam. You become a good leader, one fuck that you read you gotta go to the gym. Extreme ownership. Doc come come check out the leadership Jim and, if you want help service members, active and retired, their families, gold, star, every check out, Mark Lees, mom mom believe. She's got a charity organization and if you want to donate, only want to get in to what she is doing to help out than go to America's

mighty warriors dot, Org If you want more of my dreary divulging or you need more of echo's extraneous assertions find us on the enormous on Twitter on the ground on Facebook, echoes adequate, ECHO Charles? I am Jocker willing and feel VON well. He is, I feel, Vaughan I think that the Theo for common on the show, thanks for making us all laugh Plenty of darkness in the world and a note- sometimes he share some of that darkness, but in doing so he brings some light and laughter as well. So thank you, Theo Van and to all the folks out there in the army, Navy, Airforce Marines that are right now. Right now, we're sitting this air conditioned podcast thing there. our folks right now out

our way of life, and we thank you for it. We could not do what we do without you doing. What you you and the same goes for police and law enforcement, firefighters, paramedics, E M, tease, dispatchers correctional officers, border patrols, secret service and all first responders. You protect us here at home and again we couldn't do What we do without you doing your jobs every day, so, thanks to you all as well, and thanks to when out that's listening and listen. We got struggles in life, we gotta when it can be a scrap, it can be a fight, they can be painful and it can be a battle, but the battle will be a little easier. If you have some

So when he can don't take it all too seriously. Crack a joke have a laugh and then go out and do what you need to do, which is of course continue to get after it until next time, Zayigo and Jacko out.