This is Jacko Podcast number five. With echo house and me Jocker willing good evening echo journals that evening welcome depart gas number five. But here we are here we are number five. Thank you, everyone for joining us. So tonight I got asked on Twitter a could you talk about coaching some people and that kind of prompted me to think about something that I have pulled out in the past when I'm teaching leadership classes and what this is is to counselling notes that I wrote for sessions when I

he's trying to help a couple of seal leaders improve themselves and get better and the first one was for a seal. That was a body mine and who was low by junior to me, just a, little bit, Junior and me in rank, but you know, because I was approved, enlisted seal. I had actually burden the seal teams for a much longer time and this guy was route great great leader, great guy, and very passionate about dinner, a solid job, very passionate about the seal teams, which is an awesome thing to see, and with that passion and I've said before sometimes your strength can be a weakness and sometimes you'd would get a little bit too passionate about stuff and a little bit emotional abuse be a little bit easy to read, and

So I was in a meeting with him and I can of thought I was acting. I saw how other people were reacting to him. And so when I saw that I kind of sat down and is putting words on paper to let him know that euro area Movement and was good about this, as you know, I was the detached person, so I was able. Sit outside this situation and to watch and see, oh that's that he's not coming across the way he thinks he's coming across and so restored off without one was pretty positive outcome. When one When will you stay put words on paper? Is that, like an official thing, you know like when you get written up or something like yours, Eurovision warning right. This one was not. This was just a bro say, amen, fearsome, fearsome tips,. What's a good deal note almost year note, this is a deal

What's interesting, arresting theirs theirs in a sealed teams? There's not a lot of writing up in this. In this pass me sovereignty as a safety violation where they do something on say if they had to run up immediately, but this type of thing is a little bit the is normally you just trying to bring someone along and help him out and improve them your shipping, oysters, mentoring, soul at times it you'll need a document when you try how about your bodies, the Riis? That's why lucky here, get what it was, but I you know I went to meeting he was in it and I forget the situation, but for whatever reason I wrote this down and I think a senator- and today Let's talk about this later, but just just want to give you the stuff we know now. Someone, I'm kind of lucky that I wrote it down- is kind of like in this organization yeah? I just. I think it was more just I couldn't

to media we right. We have a reason, as are the sentiment mail, just just where I like left and on his desk Africa, who is digital, probably email, but so here we go. And there's there's some interesting comments here and that's why I think I saved it and that's why they gets its good conversation. So here we go. Here's, my no to seal leader, that is a body China, China, move along, is leadership paradigm, We go one leadership is getting people to do things. This is a form of manipulation. Right there. I use this word that everybody hates manipulation and people often replaced that word with influence, and I do it to you. I see what you want to use your influence, but what were you really think you want to manipulate people it's very negative and the website

that down the, where separate that from something negative in something positive, as if I'm too to manipulate you in a negative way because I want you to do something that can benefit me and it's gonna hurt you to me. That's manipulation. Has negative if you're trying to influence? when you're trying to lead them, you're still manipulating them, but to try to get something. That's gonna be positive for them and positive for the team. So Far as I'm concerned, when you're influencing someone you really manipulating for a positive outcome so But that being said, I think people need to recognise that and that's why I use that word because everyone knows or manipulation is you're trying to get someone to do something and that's what you're shippers, if you think about it, you're trying to get someone to do something, but I use that word. So it's a very clear what you're trying to do leaders, Chip is nothing more than getting people to do what you want both up and down the chain of command

So not just the people below you want to people above you to to do what you want them to do. More importantly, getting them to do to want to do what you want them to do is the best form of leader. And the highest form of manipulation. Susan the wage and where you don't even want you, you want the person just wanna, do what you're getting them to do. So now I go on every time we opened our mouths to speak to another person. Our goal was to get them to do what we want them to do otherwise why the hell are we talking so. Can you say the tone her voice, that the words you choose, the inflection on those words and body language at facial expression are all tools to be you was to make progress in getting your way or two That's U misuse and isolate yourself and move away from your goals so

did, I wanted to make sure that this guy, I knew, that every little facial expression, everything that he said and how we said it. All those things have an impact as people forget that you realise how important your words are and how important facial expressions are. Our port, your tone is, and how that impacts, people. You are always in negotiation anything you say and do and the manner in which you say and do it has an impact on future outcomes. Pretty simple novices when I say this to people I got so here is the best the way to win is when the other person doesn't know you one and, if possible. Might not even know there was a fight if you're you go requires the constant food victory. You can never win in this manner. So just to restate that

the best way to win in in a competition of getting so, getting something to happen or getting some someone do something the best way to when they don't even know that you won an. Even better than that. They don't even know that there was a game. They don't even know that they are doing this for a reason other than by them, free will that's what they think. That's what you want them to think again. This is manipulation. And I'm sorry about that, thing is: is that your manipulating for positive outcomes, you're, not manipulating for your own benefit, you not manipulating for did you make bad something back happen that person you're influencing them selected, They do a better job of this team does better set the mission gets accomplished. Now I go on creating adversarial or intact. Mystic relationships, never helps you reach and goals.

This is slightly related to the old, keep your friends close and enemies, closer people that outright oppose Me will never help me and will usually maneuvered hurt my cause. This is never good at least a neutral relationship, seldom real what results in someone actively sabotaging my efforts so- it's really easy to get an adversarial relationships. And that was one of my little go to words and I used to use when talking to my subordinate the ship. What at the SAD Reserve relationships and I'd say you started getting an adversary relationship with this first and where's, that gonna go and I would say to never gonna be good and never gonna. There. Never gonna go out of the way to help you in fact, when you're, adversary. If somebody they go out of their way to sabotage you and hurt you and that's that Never going to be helpful said I go on to say your history reveals that you are good at getting into

for cereal situation, you work to control that impacts, it will never help. You obtain your goals and that's the you're laughing because, as a very blunt statement right at a very blunt statement, your history reveals that you are good at getting into adversarial situations so good at the at scale. Yeah yeah, if you're real good at it, and you can see this is the Supreme Blunt put pre blunt writing here and the reason is because I had a relationship of escape. You know he was open to you're? What I had to say, and so it was like I was just being a jerk and I was gonna put him on the defensive. And he knew that any new that I was always you know look out for him. Interests and I knew he would look out for might as well. So we had a very good relationship going on don't burn bridges period. Nothing is

ever gained by this. The future is never known, and I We do what I can to keep lines of communication, open bridges intact and reinforced, if possible, so Why burn bridges so seldom in life? Should you burn a bridge and a lot of times, people think because I'm a seal and I'm a girl? save that I am like this kind of burn bridges type of person right, and it is not true, because it's not an effective way to go through. Now I go on to make a note about that. I dont like to say never, but when dealing with human relationships which are in early complex in the unpredictable. I believe that you should never

follow courses of action that cannot be undone reversed or manipulated in the future. Of course, now I'm talking about you know people on the same team, I'm not talking about you know going to war and there you obviously do things in war that are completely unreasonable, because your destroying and killing me on their never coming back. So this is different. This is this is in a team situation. We are trying to work together in your during a leadership role going on Believe in what you're saying but accept that you might be wrong, I believe, in what I'm saying and if I dont believe it. I study in question until it makes sense or age age. What I am saying until I do believe it. That's a little hard understand that peace, so what I'm saying you gotta believe what you say. You have to believe what you say and if you don't believe it

then you ve got either question whatever it is that your b told the believe that you should believe that you're supposed to believe. You got a question that until you understand it and then once you we stand it, then you have belief it, and you know, I'm not gonna. Go into crazy detail on that, because in in our book the that late- and I wrote you know, there's a chapter and it's called believe- and it explains exactly what I'm talkin about when it comes to making sure that you believe in what you're saying. But I think the point that I was focused on here was more that sometimes Iraq hand. You have to be able to admit when you're wrong. And I go on to kind of going to some detail here. If I'm wrong, I look forward to meeting it because it gives the opportunity, advertise being humble and open minded, that's interesting

and people miss that opportunity all the time when the wrong eater put their foot down and deny it or they don't take advantage of the fact that they go that that when the wrong, they say- oh, you know what echo and I'm deftly wrong here. I think you at a much better idea. Let's I'm stepping back, you run with it. That's a great sign, makes people respect you guy, that's cool this guy, this guy's humble. Enough to admit what is wrong, I lay like that. So that's actually a form manipulation his own right, because I want you to think God, I'm humble- and I am hopeful but to make sure that you see that when I They want to tell this individual you're, not good at being wrong or taken criticism. The weakness of yours, so recognise fool and again

you can see the air, the that's where that Canada relationship and have them comes already really put that J. I know that, regarding the end, this is written, I would say- maybe eight years ago, some like that prevailed, thank God for computers, because we have you no records of thanks for having saved it right, Control S, ear,. Now I go on think strategic. You will win and lose daily battles all the time. If you want your victories, which you do They hurt you strategically. Few sulk in your defeats Do you also? Do it hurts you strategically? This is wrong. In daily battles gives you the opportunity to deflect credit show. Your humbleness and victory and show- ability to lead which all help you in the long term, fight to achieve your goals losing a battle, gives you

opportunity, too generous, generous, They see your position to admit you're wrong, which both display humblest and display your ability to follow so. People every business in every job in in life in your house, you will lose little band was all the time and deciding which ones are worth fighting for number one. And then, when you do when them, how do you act and then, when you lose them, how do you act in all of these the winning in the losing is not as important, how you act upon winning or losing and how you you eat can, you to influence the situation even though you might have lost you, do it in such a way that you show humility and you open. You show your open minded. It makes the person you build your relationship with it

so winning or losing is not important. What's important is how you react to winning and lose like when you like when you say: you're. Sorry right, you know like if people to people in a relationship or even friends and get into argument whatever about whatever end in Person made, I want to say their sorry, you know, because show that I was wrong or it'll show that I lost argument or show that my points or invalided whenever they think. But when you say sorry infernal, say sorry don't be like ones are you if you were offended, don't say that can stuff, don't you like all came. I'm sorry, don't say like that. Like really mean it and when, We can do that in its can distantly it'll, be any future argument. It'll start to break down the barriers of defence in also the person, the people both won't go into it thinking. Ok, I gotta. I gotta mount this defence against this person

now it can be a little bit more of a fair problem, solving situation more so than this argument me against you. They trust they're, not gonna, you know get attacked If, if they shall weakness or whatever, if they're like well, you know what I know I made a mistake: there get you demonstrate by things, are you demonstrated that you're not gonna, go when turn up the heap when they start showing that weakness, saying ok, you can solve problems lot more easy. That's that's thinking, strategic right right speaking people going on here speaking people await going back. I say you have a bad tendency to get caught up. Tactical battles. You expand effort and ammunition, receive wounds and tear yourself up when you should be strict thinking strategically that kind of ghost what you're disabled people, in all angry and never hurt the relationship. Why? Because they want to win this meaningless battle, meaningless battle, so get patch yourself. We start feeling that anger

that aggression that frustration detached yourself and ask yourself what am I really arguing about what is happening right here? Why am I getting worked up? You probably should be now gone to speaking to people what, literally speaking too, People treat everyone respect from E one, two o ten, you you wanted the motor is the lowest ranking person o ten and officer ten is the highest. That would mean Admiral order a general ye want is there? Is the seamen recruit child wish ranking personal saint tree ever with respect speak with humility, this disarms people and is one of them asked forms of manipulation and again, if everyone is, is put off. By that term? Manipulation, which I know is a very derogatory term. And but you have to get over because you have

We stand what I'm trying to say. I'm trying to make sure that people understand that when you're in a leadership position there's nice ways of saying it, but what you're trying to do is get people to do what you want them to do. That's a leadership is, and that's also of manipulation is this. Armed people are opened suggestion over. Confidence and condescending tone, which is common for you The defence is to go up and people to get defensive so The minute you come in and you start being, overconfident are talking people in a condescending manner, they get defensive in almost under not really listening. That being said, sort of confidence and belief?

in what you are saying, as noted above allow people to also believe in what you are saying and that they trust in your judgment and leadership. However, do not speak as if you know things your opponent does not that offends everyone, especially seals, see. Never never like talk to people as if you know something that they don't. You know because it offends people, it offends me it offends everywhere. It's impossible not to be offended by that makes. You feel stupid, you get defensive, so you you gotta savings in a manner that you don't sound like. I know it and you dont your rank means nothing in an argument. Pulling rank in any way is defeat So the minute, I have to say echo I'll Thank you. Therefore, I'm right means I means I couldn't means my argument and make sense. It should be able to stand on its own two feet

and similar to that- and this is something we- we saw- a lot you'll teams and you see the business world as well. It similar to wreck it's the experience of pulling the experience. Karla point explained. The card is weak. Arguments should be. The stand on their own without needing to be backed up by the way we did it in Baghdad. The way we did it in remedy the way we did it in Afghanistan or whatever the case may be used need to say that now you can cite an example, but that should be the basis of your argument We see that the business world where someone will say what we ve been through this before met in well. Why did you do it before?

Then why we want to regain if you went through before maybe did something rocks, but that's a tendency that people have in the business world. You end up with people that have been in a specific industry for twenty thirty forty years, and so it's very easy for them just to fall back on the role that the way we ve done it before I've seen this a million times. I've always done it. I've done this before I've been through this before you ve heard all these examples, it's what people do also like if people there in some kind of debate, argument about that whenever the solar system, nobody, like I have a college degree. Almost like. My argument is better than yours, regardless of what it is because they have their college degree. I have an example of that where young seal was feeling ass, if he was being disrespected about what that he know, very much is a pretty new seal and he fell back on the argument exactly said was was like you know. I haven't I

green problem solving or something similar. I've been the classes on problem solving being that was is reason why people should listen to, which is not a good card to pull out in any situation carefully, not miss you. I've been calling up into a class on problems. You you need to listen to me. We Second, what are you just present? Your solution then let it stand on its own two feet, because if you are so good a problem solving than we, surely you must have a wonderful solution here, the class effort, it's the same thing. So to close this thing out anyway, those are some thoughts. I thought about this today after we had that conversation. I left thinking about my principles of management, leadership off the battlefield in administrative situations. These are the same principles are used in combat building relationships and leading

I also use them in administrative leadership situations and, as you know, I've been successful and that environment is you're, a great leader, just make some adjustments to your game, and you will be even better and that's it. That's how I closed out to this guy who was you know, got this note for me and hit me back and to aim at thanks. That's good, stuff and and I'll take action and definitely improved is game with it. That's a pretty nice counselling session or nice attempt to help somebody now this next eggs. And told him to go through is somebody that was on his last legs. He was in a leadership position and he was having some significant problems now he was in

inexperienced guy and for some unknown reason he was cocky. You is arrogant. He was failing as a leader and he'd been through multiple. Verbal counselling. Like I talked about, you asked me to be right: people opening this you'll teams- for writing somebody up for leadership problem. They ve been council. Numerous times verbally, because you don't expect me, it's not that part, you know it's not that hard to say hey make this this meant that Ngos, oh yeah, ok and see what I was doing. The only time you put someone that you have to action

write it down. As when someone get starts getting to appoint resale gave. This person's job is now in jeopardy, and this is again thanks to technology. I I've saved us, so here we go seldom do I have to do this most guys, listen and adjust and get better and move on my colleague, DR meaning that the training through that I had my country and your leadership asked that I talk to you and it is my job and my duty and my responsibility to try and me squared away Tactical seal leaders know this. I have personally worked well and seen all kinds of between commanders with all kinds of personalities,

count. My previous experience and patterns and training cell and as an enlisted man. The number is pretty big. I've done seven deployments serving in every spot from the youngest E3. New guy to the oldest and the task in a commander. That being said, I'm not that good at anything, but I am a hardware. I don't like to waste my time with people who don't appear to have the desire to be better seals and you don't appear to have a dozen or to improve yourself despite your history, which includes the following: getting bad fit wraps so fit wraps, is short for fitness reports in that's. Basically, an evaluation, and this guy had Really bad evaluations dislike general evaluation fiercest. Well, it's fitness finishes, unblock, but there'll be block on leadership will be a walk on technical knowledge will be. It did so there's all these blocks in his mind, he had bad fitness report evaluations getting

sent to his staff billet as a junior officers. So they took him and instead of making a minute pudding, see Opel tune, they had him in some administrative job, which is a big signal. Sometimes I'll. Do that in between tours or after you do an assistant platoon commander toward I'll. Give you a tool like that to expand your knowledge, but he just got put straight into that, so that wasn't good. And finally, having a horrible reputation in the deeds which this individual certainly did have? Now I go on and say, I didn't take this into account when looking at you as a seal officer and as a man, I don't care what people say. I judge people what I see with my own eyes at first but you're just another hour, male seal thereof,

people the wrong way no big deal? There are plenty of seals like that. I usually like them. Most of my true friends found that category, and I was one of the things about this guy. You know he was like a big guy and he was pretty aggressive and I thought to myself just what I sent a phone. Ok, you know what maybe he's rubbing the people wrong way and then people intimidated by that as time. Ass. I began to see something different This is what I see you. Or insecure about something. I don't know what. It forces you to act, arrogant and come across a selfish. You prefer As a tactical leader varies between below average and average, with some visible spikes of increased potential, you're almost incapable of communicating with other people respectfully so those top.

Right there for whatever reason- and I never figured out what made this individual so insecure. I dont know if he I have no idea what happened to him, but it's ok we have insecurities. We get intimidated. We feel like we have two over prove ourselves. It took these things happen. You just make adjustments, that's all you gotta. Do you gonna make some adjustments? You gotta, realize that you not communicating with people respectfully and ones it. Tells you that you're not view kite question. What what do I sound like? Maybe you pull out of of recorder. And listen to yourself. You have some good ideas. You have Good ideas from time to time, but you act as if you know everything all the time. Your ability to elevate your presence to that of a respected leader of men on the battlefield and in garrison is almost non existent and

I dont know if, at this time I was really using the term like detached that much, but that's what I was trying to get across to him is that he was able to elevate his presence. He was unable to come across like a leader. He was right there in mentally with the rest of the two Going on, you cannot mask your emotions and you don't understand the ramifications of that shortfall So these are the little things the little I roll. The heavy sigh lacrosse arms. I mean just all these little things that EU is like it was like an open book. When you see this guy, you know exactly what he was thinking and he had no idea that it was so obvious to everybody else.

Myself all the rest. My structure staff, his leadership. Everyone was thinking the same thing and in his mind he was good to go. He was you know he was a stone face, poker player. Yet candidates were when you can't maskew emotions but you're more emotions, reflective of your insecurity which- mention one of the first things. I think this double whammy. It's one thing: if you can Ask your emotions but you're, pretty humble in in general and you're, a nice guy or whatever you're, though with Canada, the emotions that you're not masking or something positive right. It re some positive or or a lot of help, maybe some negative but hey, look north perfect kind of thing. Bf its dislike insecurity, oozing out of any insecurity, was really the. What oozed out of him was. I know everything you don't know. Look Jacques honor! You been in the tv eighteen years and you done multiple

point its overseas and even though I have done zero deployments overseas, I know more than you yeah here we go on in and so now I start trying to make sure I cover all the basis. Sky. You do not have the understanding of human nature, team, building leadership, influence, manipulation, compromise and the broad concept of tactical operation operational, and teach leadership and management. Perhaps you dont have the intellect to understand these things, because if you did why we sitting here right now talking about this and by the the reason is written down. I wrote it down and then brought him into my office put in front of him and read it to be wanted to be crystal clear, and so that's why this is written in that perspective them saying

Why are we sitting here talking about it right now? Why am I not thinking this might not be the most polish guy in the world, but he's a good guy? and he'll get things done, because you you end up with plenty of seals that are just there does not that polish door dollars, around the edges or can't brief well or whatever I mean it's cool, there's, there's all kinds of different guys in the seal teams, and you just gotta, take what you get you? U strengthen. Your weakness is a little bit, but this guy was not getting there for some reason. You believe that you are a victim. But people don't like you are having a few in this was so weird this guy had. This added you'd that everyone wanted a fire and that everyone was against him and he was this? He was in this. You know struggle on his own against them, Girls, and it was completely not true Firstly, the meaner mean obviously escalated to that, but that he brought it upon himself, but

but honestly that somethin, I kind of I kind of pride myself in in as a leader in taking a a blank slate. When I meet somebody in ok cool, you know, hey, look out disguise bad reputation whatever ah monsieur I can do it. I want making better, I gotta take pride in that in and want to make people better. And so for him to think that I was out to get him of this training. Catherine was get him just not true. Just completely not true This is not true, but it isolates. You hurt your ability interact with people and keeps you in a paranoid. Guarded and confrontational state is rough. Rough.

Next, you don't understand the broad skills required to be a good seal leader, such as tact, teen, building communications and trust building. So it's interesting. None of this is about fire maneuver. None. This is about taking down a building. None of this is about you know, out of out a plan and execute an assault. None of this is about that, because that stuff is relatively easy to do. And what we would. Ninety nine point. Nine percent of the time when we fire a leader had nothing to do with their tactical prowess and had to do with them as a leader now

damn is a leader effect, would affect the tactical outcome of operations for sure. But that wouldn't be the the key component of their failings than the key component of failings would be their hair against. Going on you do not understand the burden of command, you I understand the influence you have on your men. This is a big one. This is one of those ones that I find this with sea owes. I find this with mid level. Managers this website, where they dont understand their influence on their people interstate when they say something off the cuff that everybody listens and they think they mean it, and it has real impact on people, mineral stand when they show up late.

Now being laid. It's ok. When they go home early going home early is ok, those are the little things, examples of little things that people don't understand the influence that they have more on their troops going on. You do not understand the gift. You have been honoured with to lead men in combat against our nations. Sworn enemies. My concern is how you will act overseas when lives are at stake. I cannot allow you to go forward with these shortfalls.

And that is something that in the seal teams, so in the future we will think loathsome is no good. You just firearm, that's it and it's actually not true. You know you have to have good reason and document what issues there having and the other thing is that that's really harsh about firing somewhat of a seal teams is when you fire someone in the seal teams you're ruining their life, it's their dream to be a seal. Now, monogamous, you anymore, their page, their retirement, I mean I've got plans. They are counting on this one. I also assume deems it can be done stating career blow and it can really ruined someone's life now there are times we go ahead. You know what this guy should be. Okay, we need to push it back a little while, when you recycle and he'll be able to come back and still get batteries, To learn more, that happens as well, but in this paper situation this guy

already with a bad reputation. This was gonna, be if he got fired from this job. This was gonna, be a death sentence for his career. So, when you fire someone from the seal teams, they're not out of the military or it was on the situation, there is sometimes a they'll get a lot of time. The officers will be removed from the military. They invested guys MIKE oh to the regular navy register, which is a harsh punishment for a guy that spending the seal teams that you in the seal teams. You have quite a bit of freedom. You get more money, you doing some job that you really like in an almost on you're, not doing a job in your election. That can be a severe form a punishment as well. Is it? Is it like going to the minors from the major league it just it just a totally different job. It's going from baseball to something completely different. I mean it's a gopher baseball to do an accounting. You know from baseball to going to.

Instruction in August, the regular navy has regular jobs that are like that. There's accounting job there's building jobs. There's you know technic technical jobs, so it's like going from a job as a sport, be which is the seal teams go here, to a job, it's more of a job but not like a dishonourable discharge now, jewish and know not unless the as any. Oh, it's interesting. I remember, I was honour on a ship one time and the waves were big. It was cold and we rely turn off the ship in the middle of the night, and there was a regular Navy guy first class basins, mate, which means you know he ran to the deck operations of the ships and put in boats in the water and And those all stormy and dark and we're on these

What's the mentally ocean we're about to go launch and I'm the guy says to me man, I would never want your job in that's unilateral use, thinking, I looked back at him and I said what good, because I would never want yours either, because I would never want to be your stuck on a ship and doing that kind of work, but it's we both had jobs, you liked it everyone's got jobs they like Botswana persons in this evil teams, though in their getting put your job, it's normal job, they don't really like, and what my point in all that is that it is difficult to ruin someone's career and is a heavy burden. When you have to do this to somebody that being said, you're gonna send these people, especially a person, a leadership position. There d be over

seize and responsible for people's lives? You have got to do the right thing and I say that to business leaders now you know you ve gotta, do everything you can to meant or someone and that's that's that's actually how I know you ve done everything you can to mentoring. Get someone along Because when you fire them, you should feel guilty about it and when, when a leaders is all really feel bad about fire in this person, ok, then that means you haven't done everything you can dimension, because if you have- and they still fail when that than there are incapable of doing the job and and they need to go- find a different job than to get potent different position. That's just the facts, but if you ve done everything you can and they can't do it than the other move out, but when you go all I felt feel bad about get rid of this person. Could you So you haven't had this conversation that I've have with this guy right here, a lane allow and saint here's what you're doing wrong. Here's, how you need to fix, it disappear

vacations, on, if you dont medium you're, not gonna, be here It clearly understand that really It into perspective right on that last item there, one when you said. My concern is how you'd act overseas. One lives are at stake, but their real. Really puts it into perspective effort. I mean really looking at it in a light, hearted kind away, you can kind of compare this to let's eat When you're in kindergarten eager report guarded whatever and then at the end, if you're a kid like this guy, get a little note at the ends. As does the auditors does not play well with her. Your guy doesn't Hermes and whatever this especially when this is the adult version of that, but times it by like ten and its sums it up,

here without last one when lights are at stake in that's exactly what was going on the Sioux here I tried to give this guy corrective measures is what I call the corrective measures number one be humble and we get asked all the time. What is most important characteristic of a leader and life, and I will say, overtime, humility and, if you're not humble, then How can you look at yourself and say I need to do stuff better. How can you look at your team and say we need to get better? How can you look at your enemy and say I better respect them you don't have that humanity, you gonna failure. So my first corrective action of this guy be humble number two. Truly and deeply accept the fact that you, some serious personality defects that you need to immediately

put in check and over the long term, completely fix so Is very concerned that this guy, I was gonna sit there, not his head. The up, ok, yeah, sorry, but not truly, and deeply accept the fact that he had these issues because there is a big difference between non your head and said. I got you, sir. Ok, sorry up! Yes, sir, I'm afraid I'm gonna do better. There's a big difference, and going home looking in the mirror and San I've got Some serious problems that I need to fix going on under stand that the criticism you are hearing from me is not mine alone, but also my staffs and your leaderships as well. I have also heard this from other people outside your command. Your reputation is

well again idea. I want to make sure he didn't think this was just Jacko being hostile. I wanted we realize it was my entire staff and his. Leadership that was being hostile going on corrective measure embrace. And contemplate the solemn responsibility of being a seal officer about tonight. He'd men in the battle and possibly to their deaths, embrace the burden of command. This is one that, for me, was very disturbing to see, because I had my bed in a battle and I had had my

guys get killed. So to have him with this attitude, where I could see that didn't occur in his brain. He did understand that these guys it he's supposed to be in charge of he's gonna, be asking them to do things. I can get him killed, don't they. Understood burden of command, that's the burden of command. That's that heavy responsibility. And yes in combat it means guys getting wounded or getting killed, and that is a heavy burden, but I will tell you in the business world, when you ve got people's jobs at stake when you ve got the profitability orders. The revival of a company at stake and dozens or home goods or thousands of people may or may not have a job. If you don't do your job,

correctly as a leader that is a heavy burden as well going on be the best at everything, you do in doing that one put everyone else before yourself. Push away complements, shift them to your peers, and your men accept responsibility of failure and shortfalls. Only foreign in them is the improvement and growth. So this is actually a conversation we had on one of our earlier bond gas. Any compliments success. You shift that to your peers and your men

nor accept the responsibility for the failures in the shortfalls and again, if you don't accept the responsibility for those failures and shortfalls, how are they ever going to fix the answers? They're, not I'm never going to change everything anything if it's all echoes fall. I did everything right, it's all useful, truly, listen! And try to understand what people tell you by first, understanding that your personal compass is wrong. Truly completely wrong for what he's right and wrong for what. Good seal and a bad one is for what makes him Sectional leader and a horrible one, you must correct this compass so that it may guide you in the right direction. In my point with this, was that I think in his mind his views

gin of what a quota on quote good seal was, I think he thought he was being it. Had explained to him that he was wrong, he did not understand what a good seal was he did not understand what an exceptional leader was. He just did not understand it. You must correct this compass so that it may guide you in the right direction. The final corrective measures lose your ego, the sky, GIF by having a treacherous record. Andy horrible reputation, despite that for some unknown reason, but I cannot. He had a big ego. He thought a great deal here

because he was a big, do, did. Could shoot. Well, you see here a talented athlete as well, but he thought had made him a good seal and it didn't. It just gave him a big ego. So now I tell them these are tall tasks, but you control them all and that's true. If you look at every one of those things, be humble Yes, he controls that accept the fact that he's need some serious work. Yes, he controls that understand that the criticism is coming from a bunch of people. Not just me. Yes, that's under his control embracing content, wait. The solemn responsibility of being a seal offs are about to lead men into battle and possibly to their deaths? Yes, he controls that ability B.

Best of everything you do. Yes, that's under his control, so all these things lose your ego. These are all things that he had control over. We need good, aggressive leaders in the seal teams. We don't need the person that I outlined above and the reason I pointed that out these, because I think in this guy's mind he was an aggressive guy. Eddie was a good leader in his mind. But I wanted you to know that, yes, we do need aggressive leaders in this field, but we don't need this guy wearing the guy that I'm just talking about, It's in your hands, good luck! Then I asked him: do you have any questions? Your comments for me, which he did not I asked him: are you sure he was sure I asked him if he understood anything

his head and again the reason I'm reading these. These are my actual notes. And then I said Do you believe I am right or do you just think I don't you think I just don't get it and that you actually know what's up? and he of course said no, I understand and even ass. He was an those words. I was not convinced, and this gentleman did not make it in his leadership role that he ended up getting fired.

He said he'd Betty understands was it like with your salty like humans. Do you know I mean he was? He was not just now. He was not openly disrespectful, And maybe somewhere in his brain he was trying to understand and trying to listen and trying to believe, but the it wasn't there so in going through this- and I think one of the reasons why I wanted to do this on the pod gassed was a lot of times. Leadership is about awareness And I use this example all the time in the movie terminator. It says you know

in the year twenty sixty the machines. Came aware, and I. To get to see that with seal leaders like they do, become aware of being a leadership position, and so that's that's one form of awareness and I think a lot of times. You don't recognize if you're not aware of something you can't recognize what the problem is and so going through this off these issues, that this guy had. I people that are missing this part cast. You don't have all these issues, it's impossible. You wouldn't even like to listen to us I because this is upon cast where we're all kind of sitting here, taking ourselves art and see what we can do better in trying to learn and people with with this type of attitude this guy had They don't even enjoy this, because I think they know everything even talk.

The unloading sought out, but everybody myself included I still go through this and I go I'll. Do that little bit right there I've fallen into that trap, I'm getting a little bit arrogant on this thing. I'm doing this wrong. I'm not. Not I'm letting my emotions out too much. They get on that. When people to be robots, but you can't emotional design a strong emotional show for your people, so. That awareness in thinking about it and the other thing this The other reason why I want to use this particular note is because I think it's as direct of a no I I could write someone- maybe I could do better now, I don't know but at the time to go face to face with someone

and kind of call em out this is about stern as I could do it, and this is the standard that we, we need to hold ourselves to that's sternness of that. What am I doing wrong and how do I be honest with myself and be my own worst critic, which is a big cliche, but yeah bureau? Moors, Look at yourself and you can't be your own worst critic if you dont detached from the situation, if you're in I don't have you can't even take yourself, you gotta, get out of that brain and it's gonna be a common theme for not just for the show, not just for this part gasped, but forever. It's one of those things is really helped me and I think, as help the people that I've worked with when they ve when they overcome that. So there's some counselling.

For everybody myself included. So now we are looking into the internet questions so Again, if you listen this podcast and you're wondering where these questions come from, they come from a couple different places on the internet, Facebook. I actually get most of them from twitter. You, if you want to see what's happening on Twitter with me, it's at Java willing, if you want to see, what's happening on Twitter with echo it's at ECHO, Charles. And if you wanna see what's happening on there and also, if you want to submit questions, then for me twitters the place to do it, because I jump on their you. That means you have to be disciplined and keep your question short, and I just drag those questions out of their own and put him into the well of questions and.

With that in some of my answer, you know right there on the spot and some of them. I go that that's good topic. So with that and and and I'll tell you. This is still from the well of questions where most of these, I don't have the name of the person, because I'm still on the well of questions of the first time I asked, and I got hundreds of question some still going through those, and here we go what drool view to become an english major in college. This is something I surprisingly get asked.

Lot, and I guess it should be that surprising, because if you dont know my story with college, I was actually already in the seal teams. I had spent ten years in this field heaps when I finally got sent to college. I had to get a college degree in order to continue my career as a seal officer, and when I went to college it was not even a question that I was gonna, be an english major. So why is that? While? Luckily, I spent enough time in the seal teams to realise that the most important skill from an officer perspective that can differential And make you do a better job of something you can emulate Argyle leadership over time and in the different points in human,

Do you discipline all those things that make you a good leader? That's great, but those aren't things that you learn in college so which skill can I learn in college? That will actually make me do a better job as a co leader, and I knew before even showed up there exactly what that was going to be in. That was english. Why well English to me was the study of the english language, the english language is the methodology that we, american humans, used to communicate with each other and as a leader is critical That you have a good control and a good grip on this medium that you're gonna use to communicate what your vision is what your ideas are, what you're saying

wages are what the orders are. You have to be able to do that in clear and concise language, and I knew that English would provide me with that. You also have to be able to understand what you being told to do or what the orders are, what the mission is or things like rules, of engagement the rules of engagement is a legal document written by lawyers, and you have to read it and understand it, and I found that this was very, very useful. This was probably in again looking back because you know what

I guess I could have gotten degree in history and I can really drill down with military. That would have been helpful as well, but the practical application of English in that job was very important and I will tell you that in any one, that's it up and leadership position. The command of the english language is a very important thing and when I start did to get into Shakespeare and Shakespeare and others at least half the audience. Just when, oh god, what is he talking about Shakespeare the thing about Shakespeare'S- and this is what I had to learn in college. We He first see Shakespeare. You think. Oh I dont understand us. Yet you this a bunch of gobbledygook. This doesn't sound like English. I don't understand it, you're not supposed to understand and people don't pick up a Shakespeare play and just understand it. You have to study what the wardsmen the guy made

up words. These made him up. So how do you know what it means you you're lying? If you say no to means he made it up. He used are Kick words it or words back then that one archaic, but there Ok now and people do not use them anymore. So how could you know what they mean you, don't you have to look them up and figure out what they mean, and that was very good for me to take a bunch of Shakespeare and have to look at these. Look at this writing and figure out what it all means, because I realized that within three years There are four years later, when I got a rules of engagement. It was written by a lawyer, and there was. Words in there. I didn't understand. I didn't go all got her understand this thrown away. No, I said, ok, there's a word understand. I just need to look it up figure out what it means make sense of it and that's what does

studying Shakespeare specifically did for me, and you know at some point where to get some Shakespeare right here and there are some very, very powerful things that Shakespeare will, which are unmatched in language. In my opinion, so that's down the road, probably not too far, but that is why I studied English in college, How do you deal with delayed onset muscle, soreness or stiffness from wait training and how does it affect your jujitsu? The jujitsu questions awesome so.

Obviously I work out. I work out pretty much every day. I I work out. That means I left way to do. Coulson X, I do sprints. I do some kind of physical conditioning every single day, and that means that yes, I am always at least somewhat sore and tired when I spoke to train the gypsy, which I usually do in the evenings. So for me, Jijiu always makes me feel better. You know? You're your basically getting a very narrowly full body massage when you train Jiu you're, getting a very aggressive The involuntary full body, massage and you're getting stretched in different directions. So

Never you know if I did some exercise that made me sore vited Daedalus and I'm feelin sore title. My back and I go. Did you? Did you buy time? It's done. I don't feel that saunas anymore. So just like a massage or stretch, I think it is loosened job in and it's pretty normal for me. I also like to train sore and tired, because it's makes training a little bit harder and makes you more ready and all that being said when I do heavy squats or high repetition, squats or any squats, where I kind of pushed the envelope yeah. My legs are really sore. It sucks to get on the map, and I do it anyways and also training. While your muscles are so well, when you're tired, it helps you technique. So you're. Not so much as a bigger guy, you know, having strengthen weight at the same time is an advantage can be used as a weapon, but can get in the way we

take me genuine. Secondly, I can get in the way of your progression. Progress ass for sure you might be speaking from the standpoint of someone is in good condition. By the way, because I would say that for most people I would argue for most people: it's not a full body massage it doesn't loosen you up. It makes you more sore. Yes, and you know what that's a good point and beyond the fact this is. You actually are right on more points than you know, because beyond the fact that yet I am in fairly good condition, because I do work out everyday. Also, Jiu Jitsu for me, because I am experienced, is generally not a one hundred percent physical war.

Mike you have when you're not quite as experienced, and if you watched you do you know what I'm rolling with guys on my training partners there all good guys to so we're we're training for you know an hour, and we can do it. It's not because, where that much better condition is that were that gun which more relaxed or were lying moron technique so that's a good point and I could see you were in the early days now. That being said, I train this way. The whole time that I've train. So I didn't. Even when I was a spaz crazy, you know White Belt warrior. I still worked out every day and when I was a bluebell training super hard. I still worked out of a day so you're. I was going down the path that you are right, but now we do renege on that and say that you're off and you just need to work out, get on the mat loosen it up.

Trading or you, I think, in the grand scheme of things, you'd be more loose yeah, but we're talking about delayed, and set muscle soreness. I think I think I would argue most people after training jujitsu, unless it is like this a light like role, but if you'd enough you're doing just at another, your normal digits again, let's say, does for around six minutes, one minute in between he's gonna, get more delayed, onset muscle, soreness the next day from the digits out, and so I think so I don't think so. Tis a issue that will not be solved on the job. I guessed I would say: try it try it. That's what I'm saying I be exert as I've been trying for years and years so we're going to go ahead and everything is every time you show up to do. Jiu, Jitsu, it's not a competition day. You know

in and not that you don't have roles and good roles and you go hard, but there is a difference between like element, let the Skype ass, my guard or on Vienna, all with every little piece of my. What does it look you're, giving me right, patent I agree with you, but it still doesn't change my argument that, even if you rolling now it yet, I think that you, after all, pretty light to not get any delayed answer must. Ok, here's one more thing, and that is where this, where you might be right, there's a funny story so they're just talk about when I went to college. So when I went to college at where she Santiago, it was. I was still- in the military, but I was my job was to go to college, which meant that for somebody that was used to working eighteen hours a day is a seal of a sudden. I didn't have age in our state work, so I trained a lot. And one of the things I noticed one day

Whatever reason I had, I think I had one of my kids was born and I had final. Exams or just some some perfect storm of events, and I missed it. I didn't train jujitsu for three days and on the fourth day I got up out of bed and I felt all like young- and I wasn't sorted this guy ousting, I feel great. What is this and what it was that it had trained and at that time were at that time we this is when Dean Lister and I were training like mad men, and he was constantly be I was competing in and he was and we would train for two to four hours a day of just psycho rolling and but again even we're doing and psycho rolling like that. It wasn't competition day and but we, but if we made me sore so you do get some soreness. Your dear correct, I think,

just used to being in a continued state? Yes or no Zia? That's what it is. The one you like Ojeda role for three days on that for eleven that forty, you woke up you're like TAT. I feel young. What is this? That's called rest, rested and Eureka really happens as travel now, nobody is obviously days well trained. Ok. So this question is not enough. Listen to the other question, but its phrase like this also I'd like to hear more about more about your writing process. Tough times what worked? Well, creative breakthroughs censure! I don't think he's related. I think this is just pulled out so already creative breakthroughs yeah,

So, first of all, if you go specifically on our wrote this book- and you could probably apply this to any kind of task you're looking at doing but the first thing we did in life- and I wrote this put together. First thing we did was we outlined the book and what the chapters were about and what the stories inside the chapters. So we both knew what the chapter was and then we said in an if you have read the book, I will have the chapters and You will half the chapter, so we didn't, we didn't write it together and try and mind melt the whole thing now, the intro, we wrote together in the outer or whatever it's called we won't together. I was co Weena. We just edited actors both of us talking, but we We have to try and mind melter or come to agreement on the rest of it. We just wrote separate chapters

and so what I did was once we once we knew what the chapters were. Once we know what they're going to be about, then I wrote a thousand words a day, no matter what that was my I was very busy at the time, was doing some big contracts. I was super busy and I knew that I had to do it in and I also know that my attention span is. I can force it, but it's not fun. So a thousand words took me about an hour. Fifty minutes to an hour so every day, no matter what I sat down- and I ended up writing about sixty thousand words so took me. Nothing is fifty five thousand words to me. Fifty five days, fifty five day straight in my draft was done, and that's that's a couple good advantages to it. Number one. When you write every day, if you right, if you skip two days and you go back- guess what you ve got to go back and re read what you wrote because

Remember it, whereas if you just go back into it, I could just pick up where I left off whom I could start writing again an hour later, I'm not to waste any time to go back and re read. I know what my train of thought was an thing mental. So so that was important- and sometimes I didn't feel like writing, of course, but I wrote anyways, Sometimes he would come out not that great, but it doesn't matter you gonna thousand words you can hold in you can adjust. You can turn into something good. And also it just takes away every excuses, gone. There's no excuse the researchers there's only you do it you're supposed to do. That's the only Can you not I'm don't know what to think and I'm I lost my train of thought. I have writers blocker whatever I'm too tired knows One answer for all these problems, and that is right, so you get rightist block good right. You got too tired I had a long day, good right or arms, How can I don't know where to take this story? Good right? That's the only

It is one answer solved every Brahms and that's kind of the same thing with with everything you know we're going to the gym. You know what I'm tired, good go work out. I'm sort good go work out, I'm the provision of good go work out. You could do you go places to any sort of you know with true, Did you get you? I don't know if I'm I'm not feeling like my a game tonight, good go trade when you, you'd go train when your mentally not bought their, because It doesn't matter. What is it? Is it world championships today and even if it is the water budget year, provided it is because the World Europe you just get on the mountain train. Yet you kid you can look at me when you say that that applies everything I don't feel like it or whatever. Let attempts create like creative block in.

I'm just realising right when you said that is the vizir first, I'm kind of understanding this in realising that ok, when you have a creative block, that's almost like in my experience is a good reason to not do creative stuff. Cause. I can't go. Creativity comes from a real like you have to feel it. They want to do it. It's like a creative thing right in Spain. Yeah or you can manufacture its broad. Oh yeah woke tenacious de yeah. You can. May I finally, whatever its broader, so you know it's different, then point is achieved. So are you saying go if you get creative, Och inflows Euro echo? Does the rights and produces and films and directs videos of all kinds, so you're saying when you can't think of what right you just stop yes

We have a clear it in a way that we say what it is and that that's ok, I mean we all different techniques. My my technique is not better than your technique. Your technique may work sometimes, but it may be work. Two percent for you, I'm talking about my technique in my technique, was open. I've got writers blocker nowhere to go this right anyway,. In what you say is when that happens to you. You say you know what I'm gonna walk away from it right now and come back to later, and Africa I say until rain other. I just realized it when you said: okay, if you don't feel like writing or Do it anyway, because. I guess I never really thought pass that because, when you say you'll just have more stuff to hone hinted. Ok, if later on, when you do hit inspiration, which now you have more material to draw inspiration from it's gonna come clearly. Ok, that thing that I wrote or put in when I wasn't inspired the ok, that's gotta, go by you can learn so much from what you put down there. Why doesn't that work or dingoes pretty good when our feet?

in border when I feeling, whatever that's pretty good, I may use that also you gonna, you gonna get way more results. Potentially, then you would, if you simply don't do anything and where and what? If it's, the inspiration to come back What does it say, minister, It's a good lesson learned right. There thinks that is a good one. So next question from Jennifer, from Jennifer- is one that I lay there. That has a name nice Jennifer, says I'm really struggling with focus. Lately, I'd love to cover it on the pilot cast focus cover them. This is. Do we get asked us a lot about focus Overcome asked specifically asked about focus, but This is one of those things in this is this is

I'm starting to realise a underlying theme with a lot of with a lot of what people asking me, and that is, I think people have a vision or a fought that aim. I've got some answer. That is, I owe you lack focus follows that's one two and three, and I have talked about this leadership and I've got some easy button solution for these situations, and this got me thinking about my kids in one of my daughters who, when she was, I don't know what how old you are when you spoke. To learn the timetables which he was that age and she got really disappointed because she didn't know or timetables, and she would action that you're young we're I've general. I forget the great, but it's you know it's like maybe second grade. Third greatness

second third grade, so she spoke nor times like tables she doesn't know, and she starts getting this, this negative attitude of I'm stupid. You know I'm dumb other key No, I dont know em and I just said will never studied in she. Hadn't She hadn't studied them, she'd sat in class when they would go over them and she picked up fifty or sixty, or maybe even seventy percent, of but you know: there's some hard ones in their right taught them to twelve. Twelve is a tough one from another country. You want to know that she didn't know and so on. Oh well, we need to study and then you'll know them. Do you know we made the flashcards and she studied on an almost genome, and then she realised that you have to practice these things and you have to put effort into them. It's the same thing, with sports. No, you get the kids. Is I'm not any good at baseball weave? You don't spend any time practising it. Read

and so it's the same thing with focus you it takes effort you just don't. I dont wake up in the morning for switching to become focused. When I was writing, rouses talk about writing this. This book that we wrote, I didn't go Ok, flip the switch refocus, I'm gonna, do a thousand words went down a new idea. I just sit down, ok, listen idiot! This is your job. You need to do it, get it done. Another another funny story is in the seal teens. We have these helmets, we had him, we modify them sense, but where these helmets and underneath the helmets but where this is headset that your radio headphones would go into some when you're in seal teams you're out on the battlefield, you gotta talk to different people you gotta have a radio, you ve got nice almost. I guess it would be to describe it. It's like a bows noise, cancelling headset for all practical purposes, but its durable and you wear that, underneath your helmet and if your leadership position, sometimes you have one group of

while talking into one ear and the other one might be the air frequencies. You can hear the aircraft office, you get all the stuff going on inside your head and that's tricky in kind of a pain. But what was wrong? Painful was the way they made these headsets. They didn't fit right, and so they were very pay four and eight they actually squeezed your heads when you put your you put your headset on and then you put your helmet on over any to actually squeezed your head and it was very, very uncomfortable. Give your headache uses it. Just wasn't funded all its sucked. So we were out on this training mission and when I was a task in a commander, and it was a long one, it was your fourteen hours,

We were out there on this target and we were securing it and we are holding it and we are searching at noon all the stuff and took a long time in about eight hours into it. One of the junior officers came up to me and he says if you kept your helmet on this whole time- and I said yes, he said: doesn't it? a lot- and I said yes that was it. You know there were just pained, be experience and I just fucked it up and eventually we figured out how to cure it. But the point is: is that does Take some pain to focus yes, yes, it is not easy. There's a bit takes will and it takes mental effort to make it happen. There we get into Canada things. I think I talked about sorcery but shut off the music set a goal,

what you're trying to get down and put a time limit on that. I used a raised myself and I write those working on race and see how fast it could have done and then go and that's that's that that you focus your focus is something that you can join. You can make up and so get focused practice focusing practice folks, yet because he can it at first glance at the first thought. Isn't that you practice focusing you be focused on practising refocus on writing where you focus on you, You can't focus, but if you practice focusing, then you can focus. Are you writing an honourable, and also everybody knows that the deadlines make you more focused when something do mean so put a deadline on yourself and make it real somehow right, like kind of like if someone Texas I'll be overrun. Ten minutes can clean your house, pretty quick. Ten minutes since June, amused by yourself about three hours, detain it's gonna,

is a bright? Take three Nathan I soon when people would to plan for an operation how long, eight to plan for an operation, we always say a half an hour, long Then you have so long. It takes to get on it start planning in and go forward, also, diet. What do you eat and any thoughts on using super food amaranths to increase few nutrition Emirates. You know this I didn't know it was either. I shall to look it up very little. Looking things up, Did your fruit, it's some kind of a green, some kind of a great. So what away? In short,

I guess you would classify me as a paleo type person. I steak chicken. I eat pork, I actually for whatever reason and don't like the taste of fish and seafood that much or eggs which is really on, yeah, I know: what's real a are Iowa hamburgers grown up and I kind of do need a lot of seafood grown up. So I just not not a big so I put a lot state chicken pork. I some kind, a salad. Just about every day at these I love Caesar salad. So I a lot of that finish. Souled I put a lot all avoid wanted. Can it be that this is Peter TIA whose really smart doktor and the? I guess the present seal of something called news. New Sea, which is this nutrition scientists is large lobbyist.

Organization to study nutrition and he gave me a. Good fought or the way he explained these salads. You know he looked salaries as a vehicle to eat fat by just putting a ton of you know, olive oil, basically so I've gotten into that lately in just really making these picks out with massive amounts. Olive oil second get plenty of fat, so I'm definitely a fan of eating as much fat is possible. You have you What, if you want to talk about I do that if you do a book called good Gowers bad calories by Gary Tops, which is a fantastic book, and gives a lot of background on it. The like, I said Peter TIA, whose bright guy were I've had a lot of great long conversations with, because we ve done some stuff together and he's actually that person then introduce me to TIM, Ferris I'd I mentioned and the first part, yes, but it's funny we'll go out for dinner, and he,

want to know about your stuff, but I do want it nutrition, seven, his take on nutrition stuff so that we have you'd conversations and good trade offs, but he will you know he explains all that stuff. Well and then and then another good thing- those on the TIM Ferris punk Ass, he didn't nervy with DOM Dagestan, know who's got a really good perspective. Another nother doktor, that's you know a work, our guy and an understanding each other very well. So that's why right I've gotten to in my life and I've got a long story. You know about nutrition and maybe someday. We can go into it. It's just just the discovery in it. With everyone else, and just the fact that twenty something twenty five years ago. Everyone fought, but not everyone, but most people fought fat was bad and carbs were good. That's not true. Actually, carbs are bad and fat is

so it's been a it's been a re and I was lucky to have been around people that new that early in and taught the information to me. So That's that's the in a nutshell, and if you wanna get with the experts, then people are Gary. Dobbs people like Peter a two year, people I DOM dynasty, no they're the ones that can give you the science behind what I'm talking about or or what I've experienced as well. Nutrition. Nutrition is also one of the subjects that you know. People vehemently disagree with each other there was a while, where I was banned by my wife from talking about nutrition with her France. In the early days of me, being completely pro fat and pro protein, and really

anti carbohydrates, when no one really thought that you know ten years ago, and I would be giving all of her friends a hard time about what they reading in what they are feeding their kids and my wife eventually band me because I was problematic in the actual. ACT here. Even the same, you know carbs or bad when there is a lot to that, but to say Carter, bad, that's a controversial think exactly In this new- and I keep saying this- but I'm not I'm not here- to convince anybody anything you want to tell me that cars are great good for you. I hope you enjoy type two diabetes get after it, but what it's not like, Carbs git Cecily, don't be instead a little argument. Now, I'm not going to

But because the bottom line is I dont this stuff that I have figured out, I've learned from people, I've used it myself and I know, what works for me an end if you dont want to believe that I'm ok with that, I'm here to save your life, The to change your mind, you know and its The thing you refurbishing is about jobs, to where I used to be really know noted. It is better than that and you do better than that- now- look! No actually there's other first one. Other perspectives, but also that are correct. Introduced. You and I actually believe that you do too. I have simply may be well rounded and all the other stuff, but. The bottom line is I'm not I'm not a year to convert people, but somebody asked what I ate and I told them right it. That's that's what exactly. That is one hundred percent sure!

that's what I did and if you want to argue those points, don't argue with me argue with Peter Purity argue with Gary Tubs arguing De Augustine, because those geysers thy mean Peter in DOM? scientists and doctors, so they know- and they will give you the facts which I could give you, but I want to do nearly as convincingly yeah, ok, ex question a couple of guys I'd like to hear your thoughts on Richard Mark, Genco Marcinko,

I think I'll and Henry Rawlins Marcinko and Rawlins. So, let's start off with Dick Marcinko Demo Deck Marcinko, who, if you don't know who that is, he was a seal in Vietnam, seal officer in Vietnam. He was the founder of seal team. Six, he created sealed him six. He ended up getting in trouble with the Navy and they kind of did a witch hunt on him and he was a venture we are actually he did. He did a little bit.

Jail time. They found that he'd falsified, some travel records and maybe to money. They found stuff on him, but it was kind of trivial stuff that was trumped up but be in a forced him out of the military, and he wrote a book in the ninety in the early nineties because it showed up in a sealed Eames right around when I got actually through buds and initial team so's you sometime around ninety ninety ninety, ninety one, you

or a book called Rogue warrior and it did amazingly well sold a lotta copies in it was definitely broke. The mould of this idea of the quiet professional, which was how I was smooth, certainly raised in the seal teams, and something that I've I've, obviously contradicted. Now because wrote a book with leaf. Have this podcast I've been on TVS, I've I've definitely broke the paradigm of the quiet professional. I absolutely try to respect the spirit of the choir professional and I am not you know. Even if you the book that life and I wrote a book about our triumphs and everything, we did great it's a book about what we learned at usually from bad situations and humbly experience. That's what the book is about and it's an effort to pass

on leadership, lessons learned that we learned in a humbling way, so so there's that, but Richard Marcinko, from my perspective, the ceilings again. This is right. When I came in, he was kind of a guy that broke this Malden and, of course, has been. You know dozens and dozens of court on court seal books now, but you're the first one very well received and definitely got some flak from the seal community, and that is what it is now now. I worked for guys that worked for him. That, literally, were you know very well that he was their commanding officer, and I remember one of them. I said to this

monsignor guy. That was had been ton of experience, and I said you do you work for Marcinko? How was he- and he looked at me with no hesitation- said best commanding officer ever had. In its I heard that everybody ever asked just about told me that the only people that you'd hear anything different from would be senior senior officers that he was. You know he be over the top. He wasn't came quite play the game, and but there is no doubt about it, he was a tough guy. He was a hard core guy and the guy. As that worked for him, respected them them the thing that I learned from him was seeing how that transition took place and how he hit the thing that got him.

To where he was too to get that responsibility of creating seal team six, which is this you eat counter terrorist part of the Every year we obviously he was trusted, he was light and he was respected. And so I saw that he had gotten himself to that level, which is very cool. But I also saw- and I again this is a topic that comes up a lot- our strengths are often our biggest. We weaknesses and so this kind of cowboy mentality, this aggressive mentality that he had it got him there, but once he got there doesn't seem like he was able to rain that back and that is something that I became cognizant of because

bout when I was younger guy when I was a young seal and then is your officer. I was definitely fairly gal boyish and, as I moved up the ranks, I recognized that I had to mature and I had to grow up, and I had to do things differently. I can do the same things they did when I the young platoon guy, as I could. I did I ended up when I became a young officer than I became a cartoon commander than I became a task to commander, and I I had to go up. You know for lack of a better word. And looking back, I should a grown up even more. You know, but you don't see that at the time so Oh that's something that I learned from Marcinko leave. No, I never work form and I met among anvil times. You know, but never spent any actual time of them, but I have also seen this exact same thing with:

business leaders with sea years, especially with sea, owes that come into a company that is not doing well and there's only one kind of person that can turn that company around somebody with a dynamic personalities and with a vision, someone who's, gonna, kick down doors and he's gonna, make things happen, and you see this guy's going there. They get that done and they turn those companies around and then the real test comes

is: can they transition from being that cowboy to be in that company person to be in that straight shooter straightened narrow that takes that takes the company then from search revival to thrive, and some of them make it and some of em don't, and I look at Dick Marcinko as cautionary tale to everybody that comes up through the ranks and gets to that point where you need to take it to the next level and how you have to change. What got you there is not going to be. What keeps you there you have to change, you have to adapt and grow. I think that's important recognise and it's important to constantly be looking around for examples and say no gas. I saw what happened there and try and push yourself forward. So that's that's my I don't wanna say my opinion is not really my opinion. Thus, those are my fault.

On demo deck Marcinko the Rogue warrior, the other one is Henry Rawlins, and if you don't know who Henry Rawlins is, he was a young kid from the Deep sea area who grew up in the punk rock seen in DC went to a military academy. And eventually, even though he was kind of just a kid at at some point, band called black flag who was a incredible band led by a guitar named Gregg in they asked wrong ones who was just a fan who had jumped on the stage at some point saying one or songs they said hey. They there had a falling out for you. What happened with their first singer, but the first thing,

wasn't singing anymore? They need a new singer. They asked Rawlins trial rounds, jumped on the opportunity and took that gig and ended up being the lead singer of the band black flag, who is a really pivotal banned in American Rock and roll, and I think he took no black flag to a whole new level, and I've talked about talked about this on TIM Ferris. Now I'll talk about it again, but there was an album called black flag, my war, which is an incredible out album and its especially an incredible I'll, album enough for those you let's not those you you Linz out there, the record used to come on a piece of work and there was two sides to it, and so this black flag, Almah called my war, had two sides to it in the first side sounded fairly soon.

What what most a black flag sounded like prior to that, which is just sort upon rock fast, be whatever side too? Was this slowed down heavy dredging power for music and our whole site is like that and that that side of that album was on my record player when I was thirteen or fourteen years old for like a here. It is all I listen to you and I He related to it, because it just one something that this heavy. This introspective this, this aggression, and anger was something that I wouldn't when I heard it for the first time as I go, that's that's what I think. That's that's what my mind is filled with, and this was a sort of my the next thing came after box out for me because by

That was. The first thing is that ok, that's what I'd? That's a heavy and that's dark, and I understand I relate to that. The happy muse that I was hearing and understand that I didn't relate to the heavy stuff. When I heard that this dark stuff I related to it now understood fuelled. And so Rawlins backfired, my war side to definitely had a big impact on me and then from there Eventually, he without a black flag and he formed his own banned in and they made an epic record which is called lifetime.

His job again this this hit me at an age where what was I sixteen and here comes this album called lifetime that was very powerful, very raw, very hard and adjust it. I can't imagine a betters sound coming into my ears, for when I was fifteen or sixteen years old, then, this our lifetime, so myself and my bodies at the time we were listening, Rawlins and again. This was these were songs about power. These were songs about an effect the cover of the lifetime? Album was two hands gripping the earth? It was near this kind of this message of it least, that's how I interpreted as the theater member. I was a kid and I'm hearing this stuff and I'm Overlaying, what my thoughts of the world are on top of it, it sounded aggressive to me it sounded talk to me

and that's what my mind was like at the time- and so I put What I wanted to I made it. What I wanted it to be into me, two hands holding the earth was up, Our full symbol of I'm coming to take over We want to control the world. I want to make things happen, so we actually- when I was a kid we actually followed Rawlins around it. We would we would let you know he played. This is in most cases like eighty eight and eighty nine, but myself my bodies who we're all rawlins and we went by Python, play ten or fifteen times on the eastern seaboard. Maybe it wasn't too, maybe maybe ten times and we believe this is back in the day. This is this- is it you know, he's planning clubs that decides you're living room? You know you're in weed.

Romano, their instruments and we'd help MA flowed. We hang out with them afterwards and it was, it was great, was cool, and that was my experience and I was definitely. I think that at a big impact on me, another thing happened. This about light Thou album lifetime in between the songs. You know If you look at vinyl records and theirs space and between the songs in theirs. There's a standard, I know what you know, there's a standard of two millimetres, let's say and when I first got that lifetime record the space between the songs you could see was it was tiny and that's because the That's the one song would end in boom that the other song after a moment of silence boom in exile would kick in it. That's what the album was like this intense just driving getting after it, so

we would go to the that we were just going to completely knots in get are insane marsh pit destruction on so out of that use Bond this in the other thing was caused me around was here we were not in drinking, we were not our job, neither was wallets. So he was this kind of any we'd see Rawlins doing pushups before the shows we too, this this guy's, like us. You know this. I relate to this guy because I want to be strong and I don't want to do drugs. And I'm stayin clean and he staying here and so we had this good things, but again this is my fifteen year old breed, and so what happens. So I took all that to mean that the way life is, for instance, Rawlins has a big tat you want is back. That's a search and destroy ok,

need. I took a literal. He go gave this. I need to search and destroy. How do you do that? Ok, what is the most hard working? What is most physical thing, what it's? How do you get control? How do you do how'd? He be aggressive in the end degree? United, do it you be a commando, and so so those again those weird twisted interpretations of my mind but said to me: ok. That means you need to be a commando and that's what I did not tell him. That's one of the one of them. I would say one of those factors that led me on the path that I'm here today I went through your training and actually, interestingly, the first Lollapalooza tour and we'd have to Google listen to you in this was, but it was the first Lollapalooza and Rawlins was playing and they played down in someone's India Lollapalooza came and I went and I didn't

We pay for it for whatever reason. So I went back stage and I waited until I saw allowance allowance and I said a romance yesterday, in eating. You gotta recognize me women. Will you recognize me. Whenever set high- and I say, can you give me the show, and I got a couple bodies with me: he said it be easier to get gender Fort Knox. It was kind of weird because back in the day we would sit there and hang out with them and help them Lotus Van and Git walk right in and it was just really cool to have that much interaction with some. That you weren't, you mean you can't do that normally. And all of a sudden there was now he's along and even though- he's on torn. You know anybody there there's a guy there me and I can't get it so. It was in high school

but isn't. It was definitely assigned to me that that things are a little different now and he had kind of made right, maybe any ended up having some pretty bigger, but he is a bigger records that did better than than lifetime, but the way it kind of continued did the way this story continues. Is that Rawlins was a guy when I was a kid that talked about Vietnam, that's, and if you read any of his nurseries, write books and I'd, read his books and you talk about Vietnam. That's out of the sky, taught him so much about discipline in and then he talk of you

the staff to the search and destroy any in his box or in his shoes. He would talk about the violence and the fights and all these things and and even talked about like missions remain calm, prepared to destroy that's from a song from Henry Round sought remain calm, prepared destroy, so he he kind of add this thing that I thought was cool. When I was fourteen and then I actually went in- and I did this stuff, you know I actually went and did the stuff that he had talked about. And then he spent his career talking about, and so all of a sudden this connection, this sort of gathers connection. That I had with him all of a sudden. It kind of faded, because I I looked at it from a different light as

It was no longer me looking at someone thinking this guy's done this cool stuff. It was actually starting to look at him thinking he didn't do this cool stuff. And now I think when I see him now in its worth about ten years older than me, maybe twelve years older than me, so he I can kind of sea its laws but if a glimpse into future be no, because you see a guy, that's certain years older than you and you know you look like you when he was twenty five and you naughty look like when he was thirty five and forty five and now he's probably five and I can see what he looks like and what he did look like some kind of I see him now any seems to be a result of that life that he ended up with witches, Hollywood and kind of famous in kind of being in movies and being a rock star,

and its. I dont, have the same. Like I said connection that I did I did but, like I said when I was a kid, I was thirteen years old when I was fourteen year old. When I was fifteen years old, I was I was. Definitely I definitely took them. Things from him and apply them to my life and I bought a loved made up of two hundred lives up anyway and if, at some point Hank, if you listen, let me know: what's: let's like up will talk about the old times, but you know- I think that my might even be some the clothes with is when, when you deal with people, people or not, will you

Want them to be your idols, the people that would you look up to the people that you think are cool, but do not that person kill your idols now, there's things that we can learn from each other, but they are going to be what you think they are They are going to be even what they should be with those people You take him when you put him on a pedestal, they're not deserving of that pedestal begging to be faulted. To be weak, they're gonna be Eagle maniacal We condescending. They can. We all booze negative things me lazy. There can be entitled to be short sighted they're not gonna, be perfect. Far from and that's fine, but ok, you learn from there

MRS Anne, you learn from their strengths, of course, and you mimic them in you, you emulate them, but equally as important. You learn from their faults and you see what not to do.

Because the bottom line is you can't control other people and are we spent time tonight talking about manipulation and influence, but the bottom line you can't control, you can't make people be what you want them to be. The only person that you can control is you you and that's what you gotta focus on focus on you figures are focus focused on making yourself who you want to be faster, smart,

stronger! More humble, less ego discipline your body, so you can free your mind, get up early and go get after it and be that person that you want to be, and that's not ease and not everyone can do it, and I'm not here to tell everybody that everybody can do it, but it can happen and it does happen, Through one small decision at a time and every one of those decisions important in building you and that's all I've got for them. So everyone everyone out there.

Thanks for listening, preceded thanks or subscribing that's kind of how we know that people are listening, thanks were reviewing. We get the chance