Kevin Smith is a filmmaker, actor, comedian, public speaker, comic book writer, author, and podcaster.
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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five dollars and the cash app will send five dollars to our good friend, Justin Wren's fight for the forgotten charity building wells for the pygmies in the Congo. My guess today needs no introduction. He's bad mother fucker. His name is KEN. Smith, go to open broadcast, checking out the jailbroken experience trying my day, Joe Rogan podcast by night all day, Biach live. Did we say we want to do that is regularly yes, every like two or three years. We pledge that we Will do these regular and then a decade goes by that we don't see each other, but I hope in your heart just like mine that it's not like I've enough of no. No, it's like you know he. I know how. If I see how busy you are you one of the few people I follow on Instagram and I I've set it on the previous show. I just love to look at you.
Life 'cause, I'm like fuck, he's doing everything he wants and nothing I'd ever one two but fucking goes to the hill and not get judgy way of like he shouldn't be doing that. But just like you know, set of you live a man's life. I live a boy's life as a forty seven year old man. So you do things like you got a float tank. You hunt. You got to hug. You know how to handle a bow and arrow on the guy. That right, it's about people that she bone arrows to stop crimes. These live boxing gloves at the end of and like yeah, but that's good to know I mean I I I do I do I, and I guess the point is, I know, you're busy as fuck, and I know sometimes I get very busy as fuck, but I think we only don't do this because of how busy we are yeah. That's all it is my is very kind of you say like that's. Yes, yeah I'll buy that for me on like this. For me for sure, for me, I'm like fuck. I could do that once a week, because I'd walk away, always walk away with a real like I've. Never done
in cocaine, but I imagine it's what it's like to do: a line of cocaine off. I don't know somebody beautiful or something like that. Now is walk away with wisdom and it's wisdom that, even though it's on a podcast and record it and there's a record of like well, that's where you learn those things I still go out into the world present them. As my own, become a smart. Well read person out there, this dudes have done a line of cocaine off someone and they're like what the fuck is. You thought I'd, never learn anything from that, exactly how to do it better, where the Ok, it doesn't quite fall into the ask where all my money go. I gotta think that was my poison and never. I still have never in this lifetime done no only done cocaine? Somebody might have slipped it to man and you and I both really yeah. I never touched it, but one time man, that's fucking, you know what I'm saying like in Hollywood yeah and also just like as entertainers were rare as well. Does it ever make you feel less than read about those of plus who tried to be funny in this business and those who have been insanely successful and become icons. They all
Please have you know, and then they did blow for hours and blah blah blah. Do you have I feel like that's, not part of my matrix. I must not be one of the great now, I'm very lucky that I know that you don't. Well that don't feel that because I think I would have a real problem with speed and amphetamines and coke. I think I have a real problem. That's what draws your eye like from a distance. It really enjoy it and I think it's the worst thing for someone like me: who's up, probably over confident person to begin with, which is served me well, but but stuff makes me crazy. I only google not because it's it's not facetious. If you walked into the facility that I just walked into and had the grand tour that you were given. Gentle listen and watch are at home. I was saying to jail before he went like he's, got this new new to Maine. I don't know how long you been here since October. He said yeah, but it's it's a paradise. It's you know, fuck the term man cave
This is like Man Empire walk in and it's just it's like walking, then the Joe's head, it's everything he loves under one fucking roof and ice. Headed home before, like you did this with your mouth, like you talked yourself into this very strange in that awesome yeah I mean I know, you've gotten you've, gotta Zilla. Things that you do but like even in the world of like the mma stuff. That's still your mouth, it always your fucking mouth that is taking you from where you started till now. You walk into this bill. I think it's not like he had a family fortune and is it was willed to him. Your mouth put you in a bit doing this. Nice painted the wall, the colored as you walk in it's like a museum. It's like you see pieces of him and Maine all over the fucking place. That's all out of your mouth. If anybody is watching or listening at home, teetering on the verge of like. I wonder if I should do a podcast sentiment,
snapshot of that fucking room where you can launch bow and arrow's for forty five yards they'll start talking, but I think If you're interesting at all, you should do a podcast. It can be uh, be a way to make a living. There's enough people like this I'm not one of those famine thinkers. I think the opposite. I've only You can do it. Anybody could do I'm never like man. It might not be enough for everybody. I remember I'm always the guy who encourages it's like hey, try it, because, oh my god, it's fucking fun for main Ann you know, we've been were rare birds in as much as we've been around since the fucking art form started, like you been doing, pot casts sends a minute after podcast cool start. First, he was the guy. I predate Corolla for sure, but I'm sure so, but you're in the first five years you were right? Well, what year would did you start? I start
Did we just celebrated last year? Was our tenth anniversary markets were now year? Eleven so count back from now is twenty seven a couple of years did. You began think two thousand and nine percent two years and nine of the big bang. When I, when I jumped in it, would does LEO Laporte doing this, you can tech, and I think he still does that and happy tree friends, and that was like the apple podcast top five and then me Scott started with smodcast and then later on, we added a bunch of stuff, but getting and within the first two years like we have and and then right on the heels of us. Was on the radio and then that radio job one away and that a what year was that were Adam, went to podcasting gotta be two thousand. If we start it's my guess, two thousand seven I got it's either in we start February two thousand seven either he
he loses the radio gig in two thousand and seven and moved to Pagas, or it happens in two thousand and eight, but it was in that neighborhood yes and he's he was the mod so for a lot of folks. Now, like Ralph Garman, the guy that I do, Hollywood Babylon love, Ralph, Ralph's, amazing. He was let go by K Rock earlier this year or later yeah light at the end of last year. Right for Christmas. He too moved into a kind of online world. It cancel Dana Motherfucker. He got enough people care about Ralph Severino Ralph Report is his show. I like him. Alot is good, very good dude, but I always liked talking to him. Okay right when you, when you go to K Rock yeah, that's our friendship again. He said they're doing the show and then afterwards, like I was a cigarette smoke in those days and we'd sit there out in the parking lot and smoke and slowly like I remember. I came in once TCA Rock just announced, like hey I've, rented a the theater on Cinema, Boulevard and we're calling it smodcast when we're good with the world's first live. Podcasting
here and we're going to do podcast there and stuff Ralph was listening, is right. There and then uh like months prior he had watch me as I came in, would you ever want to do like the show? Biz beat? That's please to do on character on Kevin and bean, like as a Saturday shown as a KIA here myself on the radio that be fantastic. So we we recorded a demo for the show gave it to his bosses. Bosses were like nobody wants to listen to, people talk on the radio anymore, and so it died there just like how years ago things died when you couldn't get past the gate keeper who is like we don't want. You should was this after the talk radio station in LA went under yes, okay, so that probably like turned on that ten were, and they were just meant that you know. Okay, rock was reading, the tea leaves, which was like people. Don't wanna hear people to this won't play music were competing with satellite radio. Now we're competing with streaming music where it's like. They don't have to wait. Fifty
minutes to hear a song dancing could shows, though Conway Steckler. That was a real. Good show. Now they were great, there's a bunch of really good shows, but the so he We had tried that there's called showbiz beat and then months later, when I was in there going like yeah I'm open in this podcast theater afterwards in the park, not grabbing. The post show smoke. Ralph is just like Haywood, you ever want to try that radio show at that theater and I was like fuck, you want to do his podcast and he was like yeah let's try it out, and so I was driving home and I texted him at a light. I said we could call it Hollywood babble. On the notebook called Hollywood Babylon. That was about like gossipy stories about Hollywood people and stuff, but we spell that of course differently. Instead, and that was my that's what I brought to Babylon other than that Ralph built that entire thing and then my job became to sit in. Next to him and react to the news which-
That's why I love that podcast, so much 'cause as you could tell that fucking. I love the sound of my voice and I wind up talking talking talking on Smodcast. I would lead on Jay and Silent Bob get old, which is really about Jason Mewes. I wound up wind up talking a bunch, but with. Babylon. I get to sit there while he's the main act, and I'm you know of the second banana It's nice to be able to top and bottom in the world of podcasting. Like you know it, it gives you a place to go. So if I'm topping all the time right, then I'm talking about my thoughts and what I believe in and these are the experiences I've had and people are interested in that but then sometimes you just want to check out and talk about. Somebody else is shit, not a podcast. We do called fat man on Batman, that's what we do. I just sit around and go like. Oh my god. Watch the Avengers and shit like that. So you get to straight on that kind of stuff. So yeah the Babylon thing grew insanely organically. We started that little theater sat forty eight people,
and since he was on the radio every morning, he could just fucking sell it out. He'd be like hey: go to Kevin Smith website. You get tickets for Battleon be sold them is that you placed on? Was it it was somewhere in West Hollywood right that little theater it was on Melrose yeah. I was on Santa Monica Blvd in an area where they put up a few black Box, theater This this section is called the complex and we had one thing later in the complex and repainted, then hung up like all the artwork like you got artwork based on the podcast out. In the hallway same thing, really, essentially built a shrine to Scott Mosier. Mike ghost of's podcast, which I'm sure on some level creep him the fuck out. First time he walked in was just like he wants to wear my skin, and so the idea was we're going. Do nothing but's podcast here, but since Scott, and suddenly go into like Alice twenty five podcasts a week. You know it stayed pretty much the same. We had a theme
here with nothing going on in it and stuff. So I started trying other things: Babylon became one of 'em Jane Bob get old? Also came out of that experience? Do you still have that theater? No, we let go that me and Mattie Cohen who's a coat post on this very fun podcast. He does with Macaulay Culkin. Have you spoken to Fucking Macaulay, Culkin yeah? No, I'm just put a bug in ear: yeah, fuck, dude, fuck He gives good talk good oral, I mean that sounds filthier than I meant it, but you know what I'm saying like as a guest and funny and anyway, Matt and Macaulay Mccauley. Do a podcast called bunny ears, and so Matt Cohen, was the guy that I had opened. Smodcastle with like I was going. I wish I had a black box, theater and Matt went out and found it and stuff. So we kept it open for like one year and then let it go because what happened was like the Babel show sold so well, so quickly, all the time that it became clear like we could move this to a bigger theater
this is the thing he was on the radio all the time. So it's easy to move states, so we, and up to the love its member of Jon Lovitz Comedy Club Ralph had wanted the, no problem love it's in love, it's with, like you could have ninety five or one hundred percent of the doors, something ridiculous and and that was the only reason we went up there were there for awhile things fell out with love it's and stuff, and then we moved to the improv instead, so we've been there ever since, and now we do it on the road. You know quite a bit and stuff that love its place is always weird. Because the people are way above your head. It was level here and one level way out there to be a did what it was Bb King's original back in the day. So it's like a jazz club where you wouldn't mind looking down right at the Aggies, but for a podcast, then with the guy with the fucking bald spot. It was nerve wracking because, like how my supposed to be funny knowing there staring down at me, judging my bald spot,
in some comedy shows there, and it was great, but it was odd because yeah you did, it was a weird shaped replacement straight now. Let me just jump off topic, real quick. What was it the times you were featured in for being like the source for news? What it's this thing that these guys are there, their they're calling in the intellectual dark web. Yes and they've connected a bunch of people together that are interesting people that don't follow. Standard, poor name bad mark, because when I read it I was like I don't think of him, as Dar web my friend Rick Weinstein. She loves that sneaky coke and dagger type stuff. He came up with the name of it. I could just get a kick out of it. I think, but essentially the piece was about how you are doing media that
open quote real media is not doing like you, guys, probably been more about the rise of like certain intellectuals that are very controversial, like Jordan, Peterson and SAM Harris and all the debate about him, I'm just someone who they get a chance to talk to for three hours in a pretty well well subscribe to basis, a lot of people that are going to listen to these conversations and they get it they go well. Why don't? Why haven't heard people talk like this before? Why haven't I heard about the idea of determinism? Verses free? Will why you know why haven't I heard last time we were here, we talked about the Universal Monetary everybody parts for the salary, yeah universal basis, basic income. I was like super hesitant about that was like that's nonsense, and then and the more I thought about it whenever I just like immediately dismissed something always have to go Why? Why am I immediately dismissing it like what is
Why I go out- and I said I was fucking people they're, just lazy. They just want money that true, let me see. It's really going on 'cause, there's a weird reaction that I had like that: a reaction against lazy people, the unexamined life is not worth living. So it's easy enough for you to build it now care, but most people end it there in their story, goes a different direction. You're like wait. Why don't? I didn't have a clear defense of my actions right. The way I thought now you know I didn't do anything, but the way I considered this subject I didn't have. I didn't have a re. Well, I I was very knee jerk, so I said: ok, let me really examine this and what the real issue I think is going to be automation and artificial intelligence. I think it's going to remove tremendous amount of jobs. I think autumn in terms of car driving and different is different function.
Once they get better at robotics and being able to do things and then people will be less and less necessary. They have a real problem, they think with cars The number of males that drive cars it's in the millions for a job, and they would all like almost instantly be outta work if they ever get these automated cars down now, where everybody I mean one since a culture that believes in technology ones inclined to believe. Oh, they will get these self driving vehicles down to a science. I think they'll get it down there got there pretty damn LOS closer to my fax it as soon as this is somebody gets it right. They get set back a couple hundred my fast. It's been a few fatalities right several, but how many have been fatality because of humans- and I always say that's true, but how many for humans are driving, then fucking robots? I mean that shit is off the charts and the number is got to be benign.
And it's like how many actual robots are out there drive. We got ten and two don't, kill people settle down, but it's still a few. If you look at the numbers, though billions of people driving cars. Only ten robots and they've already taken two lives. So that's pretty pretty. I'm going to eat us bro. I really believe that I've been talking about this a lot there's a fucking robot that DARPA created and it's called the eat robot, EA tr an it can fuck in few cool itself with the biological material any or is it program for certain biological material? I don't know man, so this is the computer that may dead bodies no doubt, but does that mean that eh it's aware of when it's powering down? I don't know here's remember either the military robot that supposed to eat humans. This is the thing I think the idea of biological Mateer
Bill is, maybe it could sustain itself on plants, maybe could sustain. Swear. I go it's possible, it's possible. You want right to human impossible. If you can use this thing in a battlefield that you would want to have it eat people, because you can have dead people everywhere. Have this fucking. Robot monster that you send me to kill. People also eat them. So not only is it killing people, but it's still cleaning up in the background, as well, taking dead bodies way, I was a diabolical scientist and I was going to come up with the uh list, mean as shit to send it to the enemy to go, get him, it will be a robot that eats people. Why because it's going to kill people right. It's going to be sent there, even though I killed your loved one watch in horror as if you consume. It's flesh and power me further to kill you next and wouldn't we I mean default into a pretty bad and kind of stereotypical and, one might even say racist, robot voice hydrology is a race? What race would that be monotone?
I feel no love nor pain and they could make it look scary to man they can make it look like venom like from the star wars, books or Spiderman plugs? That would be scary. People be like holy fuck venoms here at this rock it would be pretty cool if you're Denham fan it needs to look like that face this giant face with it. Just becomes orange, mean that if that was in the eater robot and just inside. Would that scare you with that scare, you more or would scary more if there were like the eater robot. Its head is full of hype. Dermic Needles, each one more toxic than the last and infect Obel at a moment's touch, terrible to you know: do you want to try out option? Do you want to eat by the shark which question Talking about Roseanne uh, not publicly! Now you have
our conversation about the photo shoot thought process on it? Talk to Ben Shapiro about it today on his show, but it won't be out until Sunday. What is do you have you ever encountered her in the world? I know Roseanne. I talked to her on the phone and I believe every word. She said she told me that she was taking Ambien and that she was Rock Memorial Day weekend and sheet. We did a bunch of stupid, shit and she's out of her fucking mind, and she said you know in her words I need to adjust my meds. You know, I'm not thinking straight and she was talking about how exhausted she got doing a television show and she got bronchitis and she was overworked, thinks think she's stressing the fuck out. She also told me She did not know that that lady was even black. She thought that lady was jewish and she said Maybe like do you really think that I would make a joke about a black lady and say planet base? I wouldn't fucking. Do that she's like I thought she was jewish. Look at her
so. I did look at her like pull up her Wikipedia page. This lady. She I mean she most certainly put up. So we could see it. I mean. She most certainly could be african American for sure, but she also so most certainly could be like hawaiian or native american or can be in the Italian. Maybe she thought jewish those were Roseanne said jewish. This is what she said. I do not know. I don't think she's lying to me. Species racist but I talked about here ever take him good friend of mine about it today and he got up in the middle. The night cooked him, self, Amelie ate. It went to sleep got up in the morning and had no wreck collection of it. He had to be told that he did. He was trying to figure out who put the plates in the sink. Who ate this food, where this food come front, couldn't fit
He got up in the middle. The night doesn't remember a thing and cooked himself. A meal sat down ate. It went back to bed as Zero recollection of it discovered they shit out of it during that meal at any point to get racist or anything like. I wonder you know what I'm saying like he's literally like it's one thing, you know it's a spooky story to be like I took Ambien and I made myself some it's even even your story to be. I a took ambien and I fucking killed somebody, but it's a it's a stretch to be like. Yes, I took Ambien and I said something I would never say in a million years it heartens Maine. To hear you say that she said that she wasn't aware of the ladies race yeah 'cause it you know. I do so all I know her from his Roseanne all. I know her from his decades of watching her in media. Her tv show. I followed him for the tv show. It didn't seem like. The Roseanne that I've watched for three thousand and forty years
well see. That's the thing I'm not close to her in a daily basis. You know I have tremendous rese check for as a comedian. I think these shoes a real pioneer in a lot of ways. She was his brash like really confident, lady who who shit on stupid men and she did it and it's like really bold way and stand up. That was very unique for the time. I think if people go back and you watch like some of her early stand up when she was coming out of Denver, the domestic she was a beast man. She was a b, she was crushing, she was crushing you know, and then she got. That said, common is absolutely one of the greatest sitcoms of all time now she's sixty five years old and it's fucking hard for her and that sketch rule she was telling me was absolutely brutal and that they were killed with all the work. I don't know her very well, but I do know there was another time where she said something about Susan Rice, who
this is another african american woman and she he said something about her and compared where balls yeah, something like swinging. Eight balls. You know that's two for two: it's two yeah! Well, this one for sure. Right, 'cause, this one there's no excuse for this is one from the past that You know like all my god it does on and be in a tweet. This no one said anything. Susan rice is a man with a big swinging ape balls, and that was made to be a complementary. Some thirteen despite the time ago, that's five years ago, and you can no if it's still available, but if you go through a time line and see a bunch of things. Yeah are not like a comedian being funny, but right the you know, beliefs right, that one is doubts are rough, that to me is a way rougher one its way, rougher like that. One is like that's what you said.
It is what it is, and you know if you said that the other lady looked like plan of the apes just because of our hair cut, because she looks like the the lead woman in the era yeah. So the zero. There was like a photo of her back and it was just like the way her haircut was in her outfit was right. I think some people, you know, but if you didn't know that she was black, it's a totally different thing. Do we know that for sure you know only she knows for sure you know it's you surprised at how quickly it all ended yeah. That was the part of the story. That again, I know skin in the game other than I watched, the old Roseanne and I was enjoying the new Roseanne as well, but I home from like I was Vegas the other day and I flew home yesterday morning and then I had a meeting over the studios like at noon. So I took a nap when I get home. And also my wife wakes me up, and she goes you gotta meeting. Don't forget like it's one thousand one hundred and thirty
oh and Roseanne's, been cancelled and I'm like that. That's impossible this groggy, but I'm like that's impossible, like twenty million people watching that show- and she said she tweeted something racist, so I fucking pig my phone and I look at it and stuff an by the time like this is. Happened in the span of like the hour. I took a fucking nap date that the network acted so fucking. Incredibly fast. There's no prevarication cation do they had that acts sharpened and ready? It was nuts like all the sun. I would just like for Don. We don't know or does about and and and it was I I think it was so surprising because it's been a while, since somebody did something even superficially more yeah, you know what I'm saying like I've read a lot of articles on line where people are like: hey man ABC Dental in the show, so of course they didn't have as much skin in the game. So it was easy for them to cancel it. Would they have cancelled it,
test if they own the show, and after that you can, you can make a bunch of kind of caveat. But at the end of the day the bad happen and then the network reacted a major come fuck, the network, a major company major Corporation reacted. Inactive is the right way to handle it to just immediately cancel the show I personally would have maybe fired her and kept everybody else done. Like the you know, Valerie number die off yet or just use computer animation. I that we, you could replace it with Pixar's character, but I think you can sell it equally compelling stories like without her honestly, like the nine episodes that they've done this season, she really hasn't been. The driving factor of the stories has been more about Darlene. That's why I felt bad for when this whole thing because of MIKE she's. She put the show together, SARA Gilbert, and she was like crushing on she- was like really good, showing off like what a great actor she is. But now everybody's out of job feel bad for John Goodman. I've worked with him before and he was.
Wonderful, on the show like stained the show without her I think, can she be forgiven? I mean. Can someone MEL Gibson get forgiven is anywhere yeah again Mall MEL Gibson? It was also a case of him being intoxicated right, use, yell and some anti semitic stuff in Kabul. I mean remind that alleging also punches ex wife, like his dad There is a more violent action than him. Just get it saying: hey Sugar tits like there was some his wife and record recorded him yelling at are on the phone Nobody knows if he truly, I don't know my bad. I thought that was I don't Oh I don't know, I don't know the even the specifics of any accusation. Also. I also didn't follow that closely and not because- MIKE man. That's Martin Riggs, and I don't want to hear anything about it. I just didn't follow it. 'cause, I'm like can she be forgiven for sure, will she be forgiven? I don't know I mean look
shouldn't. We did what you said instead of oh, my god, I took Ambien like you know that turned into an opportunity for a major pharma suit. Cool company to like put out. One of the best singers twitters ever seen. I mean like this: a company they're not normally used to like he will show we say to be funny like they have to put out very staid information and for once they were like how about this As we say, racism isn't a you know, a by product of a drug really well said there was. This was on well worded. What exit then go like what a night tweet that whoever wrote it was for you, whoever wrote a rather is pretty slick. The thing Ambien does do, though it definitely makes you act. Bizarre. You There's some people, it's one of the one that supposed to make you go to sleep. I mean if you just there's a web. Motivated, eat edibles. That would help theirs websites dedicated to people that have had crazy Experi
this is all that stuff I've seen a few. Then it's not the one that you told me about your friend cooking dinner is about the fourth time. Somebody is communicated that story drop could've because they've been listening to your show, and you may have said that, story. Probably have people drive cars on They go places that I realized. I don't know what they're doing to get places like the server and the Rainbow man you becomes on the five year, like I'm, not yeah your bill, Pullman and casket. Well, there was a. There was a guy that got pulled over a few years back. Who is famous- and I forget what it's it's something about like I gotta get to the dance or something like that and the cops are like what the fuck are you talking about, and they really just like he was kind of out of it and then after is over. It was revealed that he had been an ambien and then he had gotten in his car and really had no idea he didn't even know you capture pulling him over, like literally the guy was in a dream. It reminds me of when I was a kid. This is not drug related, but I was a kid. I was sleep. I fell asleep on the couch watching tv and before, like my brother,
that lost his fucking wallet at a school dance and my mother was like I'll drive you up there and try to find it, and my father would get up for work at about nine hundred o'clock at night and then had to work at one thousand o'clock, and I think he started work at one thousand one hundred o'clock at night. He worked the post office, cancel and fucking stamps, so he uh. My mom tells me that, and I fall asleep on the couch watching like fucking dynasty or some such shit was the 80s and then my dad wakes me up. Because he woke up and nobody was home, like my mom wasn't around nobody? Was there Where is everybody any fucking startled awake? So I was like what o Donald Donald. They had to go. The school 'cause Donald lost his thriller and at my father goes what I was like Donald lost his thriller. And he was like- I don't know what you're saying and I was like mom said that Donald losses thriller and I kept replacing the word wallet with fucking, throw or my father. Looked a man and literally said he's out the next day to be like. Are you using drugs? I was like now you woke me up. I
I guess I was in some serve. Maybe I was dreaming about fucking throw it was one thousand nine hundred and eighty two you know like your brain. Just never clicked back over into waking life stayed in this weird zombie land, where, where wallet meant thriller, did you find that what we we've got pulled over and I'm trying to remember what he told the cops when they realize that something was going on? I think it was. It was in one of the articles that are too Did the story was in one of the articles that we did? What happens in that instance? You know here's what here's I think and I should have a rescue for being the Ambien driver. It's this is it's a rare reaction because a lot of people take that right in a lot of here, the story all right time. Not now, there's not a not selling. Just a couple of those pills a day right is not knowing what is devoted to stories of people who took Ambien and and got fired for being. Racist is right. Well, even better. There's no stories of people that took Ambien and you know,
came addicted to it. It became some sort of a or is there is an addictive examine, addictive the gap profits. A probably a thing did like getting addicted to falling asleep in their new. You get to fall asleep, probably yeah yeah, I guess. If you're somebody was like, I can't go to sleep without that one. If it's addictive, like maybe like a heroin, is addictive no right or like a speed. You know, like people get like physically addicted to think where it kinda this changes the receptors and yeah yeah. I don't know if it dulls the senses, to the point where, when you and that's what the way always explained to me, was when you're on Heroin, the senses are gets old, nerve receptors, like just don't take in as much, but when you're, not on heroin. That pain of withdrawal, part of it, is the receptors coming back to life all at once.
And it was like and yeah Jason Jason Mewes long time ago. I had problems with this shit, so it was one of the rehab doctors communicated it thusly. He said you know how, when you sit on your hand and fucking falls asleep, I'm like yeah totally he's like imagine. That was your whole body and times it by a million. That's what he's going through, no it's like, oh and then you know comes up till then I was always like just fucking stop doing heroin. Just stop it and then. Meanwhile, I was eating a lot of sugar, just stop doing your job and even my fucking drug, but once that dude explained it that way I was like. Oh, that would be. That would be fucking. No wonder that it doesn't want to get off heroin 'cause, he like, I know, the path to not being on heroin, is full of pins and needles, but you never die from it. That's the good thing about that, like you, don't die from heroin with we know from Amy Winehouse in other cases that you can die from alcohol withdrawal but you can. You can get off like when you're in jail and your
chicken heroin. You know the cops just like you know here, just keep throwing up and pissing, but if you're kicking booze they have to give you booze 'cause your heart could stop. What do we get? This partly pull up an estimated four hundred and forty six thousand people in the United States were current, miss users of ambient. No, what is a misuse or may dangerous dependency on to ambient can develop after just two weeks of You still in attempt to quit without proper knowledge and before, pudding a medical treatment plan into place, wow too. This is all it takes two weeks and you Godsville son, maybe maybe not driving around having conversation either. One of those guys that uses Ambien gets a good night's sleep and performance at the job in the morning. You can't wear your like you. Just lose a word like you're, like Donald lost, his thriller and that's the love, Best mildest form yes every now, and then you skip a word which I do now. I call that hitting a pothole.
You know, Roseanne is she's an older lady she's in her sixties, and you know: she's had some mental problems and and she's drinking and she's taking that stuff to go to sleep and she's not taken for just two weeks, she's taking it for a lot. You know and she said she needs it to go to sleep and if, there's a lot of people that feel like they need something to help them go to sleep, that's fine, but then for me to want to get fucking works yeah. I don't think so. At the end of the day, it's not like she took Ambien, and that makes her bad like no it's. She fucking when she did- and it's like, if you think for a second that if in using this drug, which I need to go to sleep, because I'm late 60s moment in any of my rest or whatever at war, We just deserve fucking sleep. Like you know, I've merciful have never suffered from a lack of sleep, but I know people who have and it's fucking mind, bending and stuff but if you know you have to do, that is the slightest chance that you could become somebody else or say things that are not in your character. Give up you
park and social media man like. I don't think you probably better realize that she was obviously going to do that. I think she had tweeted ridiculous shit in the ask before and it flew under the radar and nobody cared, but it's a racism thing you know, and what it was fascinating to me about it and, what's positive to me about it, is that we have our culture has like a fuckin zero tolerance for racism. Now it things have tightened up, so much highly possible that within a few decades, like race, system can be almost completely eradicated. I think it's possible with the spread of the internet, we're going into like fifty years from now, sixty years from now, racism could be seen as the ridiculous idea that it is racism can be seen. The way like you looks at it. Someone like Jamie will be like a Roddenberry world it'll be like STAR Trek where people like, maybe back, getting today. There was something like that, but we have an experience that in centuries yeah the disk,
trust and hate for specific gigantic. General groups of people like Asians or blacks or whatever and the disparaging ideas that you have about erase. Because of persons from a specific part of the world that shit, it's gotta, be a thing of the past. We gotta get past that I would love to believe that, but unfortunately we live in a bubble out here. Where do live in a in place, actually does kind of work. You know at believe me. I've heard people out there about to like judge the fact these fuckin cell, in California California, blows the one I'm not saying, like yeah, California, fuck the rest of the world, the fuck, the rest of the country, but I will say this everyone here lives fairly multiculturally and it doesn't seem to be, I mean granted. In this area of the state. Perhaps it's different elsewhere, but it feels
so I'm not going to say utopian, but it feels like people get along out here. Even if it's a plastic get along it still they get along pretty good yeah. So much other. I think a lot of people in the state where that's you know died when the election went the way it did, because they were like what no, because that's now the way life works was not the way life works in most of California, but I like the way it went for a bunch of reasons in a lot of the the middle. The country didn't feel represented right. They have a significant say when it comes to you know the what's: it called electoral college vote. That said, that's where we get squirrely when you look at like with the points that day, different states are worth like. There were very weird that we still have that it's not a person one person. One vote now one person one vote like these weird fucking inbox. Why isn't one person? One vote like this is explained to me in high school why the electric
it was necessary, and even then I was like yeah but well one person, one vote kinda, makes more sense. Now. Both you- and I know Jack about Politics- is who makes this this journey of four or more people a difficult leading from their ears going idiots, but the checks and balances that are in play, like the representative government, is we keep someone from just like running through the whole thing and we'll get a little bit of a test to it, but I liked I met a buddy years on plane playing God guy, my nice guy, but he is what I want to pass on, like we were on a forty five minute flight, maybe super smooth, like in and not in the way of like hello on Lando Calrissian, but this dude had a thing like like rep parts. It's not like. He wasn't like having sex with somebody, but he had a rep tag going with the flight attendant. That was so effortless
any. I sit next time we chit chat before the flight, and I had mentioned something about Joe Rogan goes. I know Joe Rogan and he talked about like content balawa, but in any event for the rest of the flight. I had like a front row seat for him talking to the flight attendant Anne. It was like it was a real clinic in like oh, like he's got that thing that, like we've, had to make up for not having my whole if I don't like people well, not even just talk to people like like the I, like you, watch like a fucking movie, star, say two things and people like you know you you like he just had this person in the palm of his hand, and I'm being, careful, because I don't want to seem like you like, he was making the moves on you, what we wasn't, but he easily could have been with that person by the flights end and as I sat there watching it going like I've had to make up for
deficit. My whole life be like here, here's some any things in hey. I sell star wars and talk about all this other shit to try to trick somebody into fucking met this guy It's like sits down on the plane was like what's up and she was like. Oh yuan instantly started going to to him, and I was trying to discern throughout the whole flight know each other. Is he see her on this flight often or something now dry, heat that flight as dry as anybody else and literally could've walked away, hand in hand with somebody who's very impressive he's got BO hunter confidence. Is that what it is yeah? That's what it is. It's got to be the same thing you would do not even a regular bow hunter he's like a super advanced bow hunter were compound. Bow was too easy for him. He said that was s which, over to a Recurve bow, yes was he has to get closer to animals and using practice more here is explaining, but my friend Aaron Snyder he's a little bit crazy without Eve.
And he was explaining that when it didn't sound bragging, we've got a really good podcast. Is it not because he's a farmer cast towards AGO Cafaro K? I f a are you it's it's a company that he works for the make really high end hunting and hiking backpacks and military backpacks, and he does a podcast through them. He said he's very good at it. He's very good at talking funny. I can attest to it. I sat there and watched him be set up hunter confidence. Is that what it is yeah, I think so, yeah he's, because not all minors whole life like there was nothing about him. That instantly I means done lag very, not like a, but there was nothing about his thing that was like if a guy's guy. It wasn't even that, like honestly, that flight attendant, probably could have been a guy in a barren, was just as interested in short row. A short range bow hunting. He would've landed that guy as well like he was very
like when he said I do apologize to it made sense as like. I bet you do yeah smart dude, so that's a weird way to live. You know it spends like two hundred nights a year in the forest sleeping in like either a bivy sack or a tent or under tarp. I fucking just like he's out there all the time. Man, it's like, there's, not a whole lot of people that are doing that more words than man he's another guy is Ex military too. It's a lot of these ex military guys that get really in a bow hunting because they find it very difficult and a physical check challenge: and's, nerve, wracking and it's hard to keep your cool under pressure and for a lot of guys who they go from the military and maybe do a few tours overseas and come back to the mainland and to have a real issue with being just now: stimulated enough and you feel detached, and you don't feel like you're involved in anything. That's got I a high adrenaline threshold and for a lot of
These guys bow hunting is very therapeutic. The so, is that an issue when people come back the issue I always hear about, of course is PTSD, but that sounds like the opposite. Like somebody who's like, I was for the Russian now the real world offers like that's that move her, not even necessarily that they were yeah that hurt like let her rot, locker in not not even necessarily that they're there for the rush, but that once they experience that rush, you know got to write this book up too much. But Sebastian younger, wrote a book called tribe, and it's all about this, and it's about these guys coming back from war and trying to just of assimilate in having a really difficult time and how so many of 'em talk about when they were over there. They had a purpose and that life was intensified and cranked up ten and the highs were the highest in the lower the lowest and they come back here, and everything is just too flat. It's just really hard for them to adjust and they feel disconnect from their community and they laid long to go back and that's why a lot of
keep signing up and going back, and they they feel that that life at the tip of the spear is actually more more satisfying more rewarding. It just feels right for them and the regular world, for whatever reason, they've just tasted at or they've they've adjusted to it the, but they are, they have a very, very difficult time. Some of them do was the closest you've ever felt. To that like have you ever got even close to the feeling of like what have you done in life that is given you the adrenaline high. What's your high just adrenaline rush, I guess I'm asking the most nervous I ever got was when I was fighting when I was doing martial arts 'cause was a nervous for a good reason. It's like you might get fucked up. It's really possible, you might get kicked in the head, but the second most nervous was before I did stand up for the first time I was shitting, my pants man, I was really fucking nervous. I'd
no. I don't living room funny like. Were you high school funny? I was locker room funny I was. I would make my friends laugh in the locker room does that's. I got talked to a buy, a good buddy of mine, my friend Steve, Graham one still good friends with. He talked me into it, hey my friend at shorter. They just they talked me into it. I would make them laugh right. You know, and but I thought the day were laughing because they were my friends and I thought, like everybody else, gonna think I'm an user like there's been polite. Well, it's all that too and, like my sense of humor, was up because it was all fighters. You know and so everybody was like they were hard men, so you had to have like a certain staying to your gallows, humor. Well, everybody was on their way to go. Kick people in the head. It was just a weird life. You know it's very, very strange way to be fifteen. You know, have fifteen one thousand six hundred and seventeen. That was like my whole life to someone that wasn't the adrenaline rush they would read
Even brush of doing standup was unexpected. That's why I freaked me out 'cause. I didn't think I was going to be so nervous and I was shitting. My pants, I just didn't, have a background in performing and right before I was going up. There I was thinking all the time that I I fought and I should be comfortable doing this, but I was fucking shit in my I was so terrible. So I'm so terrified. It was in Boston, a place called stitches. Are they still there? August, twenty seven one thousand nine hundred and eighty eight- no not talking you know the date for sure made me cry. That's awesome! Why do you remember that? I don't know? I always remembered it say it again: August 27th, one thousand nine hundred and eighty eight, because it naturally everything I hear I have to put through a filter of how does this affect Maine. So I'm sitting there going what was I doing August twenty seven, one thousand nine hundred and eighty eight I just graduated high school in June and where was I working house we're going to buy Rite, liquors and shit like that, and it would be Two years before, I would go onto the stage at rascal
and even town between the Monmouth Mall. Tv Square Mall and try it myself and I didn't choose not to West Orange. No, that's that's up north. Ours is down in like by Asbury Park. This bro, that's my that's. Si did that twelve. However, at once as well yeah as a pro, I went in an open mic night, just because I didn't tell my fucking friends because I was terrified. My free, It would be like. Why do you think you're funny and stuff? I was not that funny. To my friend, so I wasn't sitting there going like yeah man comes. Report me. I kind of did it on the slide and stuff, and I did five minutes and I made like one joke that really worked a bit about sucking my own dick, and that, wound up in clerks like it was tested in front of the audience. So I was like well. I know that might get a laugh and stuff so What was how long was your first beaten? Was it open? Mic is open, mic yeah. I think they gave you five minutes and I don't think I even had five minutes. I think I had or would you do observe? No, I just I just told some terrible jokes
terrible jokes literally set up yeah yeah yeah. They were awful, the stuff that I written. Where did you write them down? I even had a piece of paper to be with me on stage was terrified. I was going to get guys grow new Europro when you put that paper away, I'm about to cry that so fucking sweet man, a young you. How old are you at this point? I was twenty one, why'd, you wait so long after you have to be twenty one to get about. Why I lose you to go on a night club. You know that's what thought. Apparently I was wrong now an you. They would allow you as a performer to go in their younger, but I didn't know this at the time. I thought you had to be twenty one, so I waited twenty one which is August 11th, and then I went up August 27th. What was the what got the biggest laugh, but who knows you know the fucking day and you can't remember other materials, TB try to think past as quickly as possible
the one joke that I remember this is my impression of a good looking girl getting pulled over by a cop like drill itself faster going. No, do you, like my tits. Yes, I do here's a warning. I is that that's how bad that's, how bad the comedy I was slinging, wanted to take you home man and put you on a shelf like gods and adorable joke lady. Is german? Wait a second how many years before news radio? Is that eighty eight was six years so technically. If one follows the journey backwards, that fucking terrible joke land Did you eventually on news ray yeah in a way and get you this frontal welding yeah? In a way? That's not mock that joke anymore, those good strong! Well, that's the weird wings of a butt fly that becomes a hurricane right like we go back in your life and think about weird little left. You took or right you took when I take a bunch of those when I had a three months ago at heart attack when I was on the
there's just like you, you have a hundred and occlusion in your lady- and I was like I don't what that Means- lad is your main artery that goes across funding heart he's going it's its one percent inclusion means one hundred cent blocked. You've got cholesterol is blocked, there's no way for them to get through and that's what's creating your mask. So he's like we're going to we're going to take care of it right now. He goes but your account book guy right, I said yeah and he you'll like this. That artery, that's called the widow maker, and I said why, and he goes because in eighty ten cases of one hundred percent occlusion, the patient always dies. He's gone, but you're going to be in the twenty percent. So I'm really good at my job and he fucking disappeared into my crotch one of my grind to my femoral artery and Fucking went up into my heart and put a stent in that in that lady. At in the moment he opened up. We going to open it up now and he showed me was tiny little mesh wire thing. He goes, I'm an open up. Suddenly, it was like, like
that. Artery had been like a hose if you bend it and it's fucking full of water and shit was pushing down in the heart which was in turn pushing down. On my lungs, I had no idea. I was having a heart attack. I just felt like I couldn't catch my breath no was too hot and it was in between shows between two gigs. When you were filming, we shop them both? Well we're going to shoot them. Both we only shot the one because at the heart attack- and we didn't do the second, but was for the folks in common dynamics, and it became a Showtime special. So we were shooting two shows that night was meant to be like an hour in an hour, but you know once you get up there. If you I'm fucking rolling, I'm rolling, so I did two hours and f in the first show they were like. We don't even need to the second show we can cut an app where only got an hour out of it. So you gave us plenty and stuff. I said I got two different hours, so I want to do the second show and plus everyone was there. They were lined up, and so I took a big swig of fucking milk. I is the dairy drinker heavy dairy drinker. In those days, I've since become vegan ice happy now, I'm fucking vegan, but uh. I took big swig of milk.
The green room and chit chat real, quick with Jordan, who runs our company's Jasons wife, Jason Mewes is wife, Anne Emily was there. She does care and makeup. So chit chat, and then I was like man. I feel fucking weird. I feel sick. I feel like I'm gonna throw up. Can you guys get outta here 'cause when I get sick? I just want to go off like an animal and fucking die alone like I don't want to be ministered to him like fuck off and shit, so they were like yeah totally an I laid down the floor and I felt like nauseous nauseated and I never feel sick like that and went up thrown up some bile, not in chunky, but just like fluid. And so I was like well at Mount and maybe I'll feel better now stood up, and I looked in the mere I was just. I man just swamped man. Now is every dude, you sweat when you fucking breathe. This was like I'd look like I just came out of the pool and I felt really cold. I couldn't get warm and ship Emily pop your head and she's like are you Ok like no one. Can you turn on like a hair, dryer and just like drop me off, I feel fucking freezing cold and she touched back in mind. Causes- dry me she's, like you, never feel like this. This is scary. You should do something so you
I said I would still want to do that second show, as I'm going to find a couch just find cash for me to lay down. If I get like one slash two hour nap, I'm sure I'll be fucking fine and I couldn't get comfortable on the couch. Could sleep and that's when I started not being able to catch. My fucking breath Can you think you know? I know my body and I know what this is. I smoke too much weed and I've got too much mucus in my fucking chest. That's all this is so I said there sit up and put my arms up. Like this 'cause that will help me breathe and comes around the corner eventually, and she sees me she's like oh you're right and I was like you know, having a hard time catching my breath like a break. I just can't get all the way to the top and stuff of the breath can't take a full fucking breath. I was like. Maybe maybe we shouldn't do that second show. After all, and she goes out, we already cancelled it and I was like why the fuck did you cancel the second show and she was like cuz. I never seen you sick, like this she's gone, you know I did this. This is weird something going on so yeah. Maybe I should see a doctor.
And she goes a Sunday night. All doctors are closed, so we called an ambulance. I was like why the fuck did you call me Oh my god, this is don't is embarrassing. She's, like they already here, and six fireman, came into the room, big brawny fucking days when he called paramedics. Fire department comes as well so they're looking it makes I'm sitting in the chair with my arms up and and like there are some of them were young forum? Were young and look, they look looked he. Likewise silent. Bob celebrating a fucking touchdown, you know and shit and then all of a sudden ' medics came in and they there was a guy in a girl and the guy put stuff on 'cause I man man's a good. I can't really catch my breath and He goes well we're going to look at you right now and put the cuff on you. You ever had this done. I said oh yeah, I know how to do this and then the girl had a like a look like a fishing tackle. Except a bunch of leads wires coming out of it and shit she put that down as heart monitor thing. You know they get your fucking, blood pressure. All that shit on one arm than the other thing they put on your chest to monitor. What's going on inside, so she's like I could put these wires on you as ok, okay
and I'm sitting in the chair- and this is forty pounds ago and sit thing- is no good angle for fucking fat guy to begin with and shit like that, so she just yanks my fucking hockey shirt and my undershirt up and free tity. I have falls out of my fucking shirt in front of these p and there's a room full of people in my golly talkin. I yank my down she's like what he done as a man. That's my best friend wife. Over there. She never seen my fucking test, wifes never seen. Much is like a game. You don't yank my shirt up like that, because I have these wires on you. I said well all the shared I you reach up under and put him how much is it to seek- and I was like just use my nipples as God, post like it was. You know. I've spent all of my life trying to hide my fucking fat and when you're Life is in danger. I've never been in that situation, but when your life is in danger, nobody gives a fuck about your again ego and shit like their your vanity. So they looked at
their info and they realized. I guess what was going on. They were going to take you to the hospital just to be safe, and I was like don't do that. That's fucking embarrassing and she and they're like nah we're so close man it'll be fun. You ever been in the hospital I was like. No, not really like is also fuck. It's fun. He goes you're going to have a good time. Is it right, and you know I'm a podcaster, so I'm like look at the end of the day. No time is wasted, everything's a fucking story, so if this turns into the opening five minutes of Hollywood Babylon, where I'm like, they took me to the hospital and turned out it was just too fucking high like life's great, when Podcasts are 'cause. There's no such thing as fucking bad news anymore, like it hit it- can hit you on the level of like oh shit, that's unfair snap it right away. You repurpose purpose it into like alright. Well, I got something to talk about and this latest setback is just the longest. It is just a momentary chapter in the long story, you're fucking telling so I was happy. Go to the hospital, not because I was like I think, I'm dying but because I was like all right, but can I have a story to tell after this next week, it'll be fun? I got to the hospital
like doctor, Ladenheim ease the guys now my cardiologist pull me into the er and he's like hi. How are you I'm doctor? Late name is Amy an hour. He goes out what's wrong. What's going on? Is that can't catch my breath? He goes well. That's 'cause you're having a massive heart attack. This is the first time anyone had said anything like that. How did he know for sure? That's what he I think, what he knew for sure was when they put the needs on me and the blood pressure they looked at each other at one point, but assumed, like numbers that will show up that indicate that something just happened and they made this wonderful call. I gotta find these kids give him a hug one day on the call, she 'cause we're shooting that night on the call sheet. It was a different hospital, but they took me to Glendale Adventist because they knew that I was in having a cardiac episode and that's shy of one hospital in New York. Glendale Adventist is one of the best cardiology wings in the United States of America. So I happen to be in the right fucking place at the right time
supposed to shoot my comedy special at the Ryman Aquarium in Nashville. It wound being shot instead at the Alex in Glendale and stuff, and if I hadn't been doing the show there who fucking knows man, I'm I've gone to a hospital, but I probably might have fucking died. Homeboy told me when he went up the heart when I was in the operating room and he told me like they call about the widow maker and eighty percent Eight thousand and twenty I sat there gone like these. Are the weirdest dogs I've ever had in my life. I figured like if you leave the house five thousand and fifty you're going to fucking drop dead right. We get it car struck by lightning trip over fucking dog, and then the dog bites. Juggle earns you fucking bleed out your like, but I always love dogs and you die ironically, but you know just training along but eight thousand and twenty men, twenty percent chance of life was fucked up. Fucked up thought. First time, I've ever had that kind of thought and in my head I had to cognitive you don't know you might have been- to death. So many fucking times in your life,
might have been like a psycho behind you with a fucking knife and then all sudden got a cell phone call and forgot about you or something like that. So suddenly I re purpose to the whole time I was laying on the table. I get re purposing everything, not re purposing Cognitively, reframe NG. I was sitting there 'cause. I couldn't like at one point. They were like your wife's on the phone. Do you want to say you want to talk to her after they told me that I was having a heart attack and that they had to get up me fast and stuff. So there phone number phone, an I see it and as the first time, a crystallized where I was like. Oh these people think I'm going to die like I was in no pain whatsoever. Couldn't catch my breath that kept asking me like zero to ten. How do you feel? What's your pain level, I was like negative three: you're doing this wrong. I didn't feel pain. It wasn't. I grew up in the 70s watching Sanford and sons, and my idea of a heart attack is Liesbeth, that's big and she felt none of the symptoms, no numbness in the arm. Anything like that of sweating. I threw up buy a little bit of bile I was cold and,
and what was the last one is just fucking shit. You would never associate with a heart attack. Are you associated with, like I just I feel under the weather, but a pair these are symptoms of heart attacks as well. I like to share it because some cats never heard that beef, or, and I've seen a lot of people on social media since we're like you, save my life here is why, because I talked about the fucking symptoms and shit, so well, I'm laying there and they go up. Your growing go up your femoral artery to your heart and stuff. He I went up and he thought it was all blocked he uh I said later on. I was just like fuck man like I'd, like dropped. Eighty pounds. Three years ago, I've been like walking up a hill mile and a half every day and stuff. He goes yeah, but the kind of package you had. You goes that didn't start fucking recently he's gone that started in childhood and I was like man I can host is twinkies, and then I remembered we had no money. So as a young man fucking little Debbie Swiss delights and shit, that's how it happened. It started with a little Debbie, cakes and with you 'cause I was raised, but you know we were trained to like twinkies more because they had a commercial little Deb.
I would never bother with the commercial, then didn't have a commercial did. They know You can't well that leaders later they did, but when we were kids they didn't, because how can you have a commercial and sell your prod the zero dollars and fifty nine cents, a moister cake looks like a better experience. 'cause they had more. Those trans fats that not just so God damn did they have Trans fats back then I think so you didn't call it. That's probably well think about it transfer. They're part of when you eat like what were those cookies that were is like a White Oreo god damn it. I forgot. The name of it is well fairly well known, but when I was a kid, it was an older brand from child, something my parents childhood and hide rocks hydrax their name. Hydrax comes from hydrogenized palm oil or corn
turn oil, and so terrible for you, so they that's when it began. They were like hey. We can take this and fuck it up and turn it into something. Edible and shit like that, not knowing it would block arteries but canola oil, like all that kind of shit kind of nonsense stuff, but I went after heart attack, I want fucking beach rocks there. It is hard drive that is crazy. It's named after a chemical that could fucking kill you that's how they marketed it back in the day, kids. Chemicals do dice to fuck up some pepperidge farms. Cookies. Remember those pepperidge farms. In the little white topping of a fat man, I've eaten every fucking cookie. There is with melt do you remember when they marketed the almost almost home. Cookies home cookies are so. Essentially there is a craze and, and still does they say, still exists to some degree, but when we the children cookies work hard unless came out of an oven fresh,
but then they started serving the Zsoft bake cookies. You can get them there, they are almost oh now I remember grocers island shit, and so you take this cookie out of the package and bite it. It was soft as if it came out of the oven. That too was a chemical process. I believe, because things are meant to get hard after the course quickly, it didn't exactly man. It's like watching porn, get hard fast, you're eating some mush that doesn't turn into mold. I I went vegan post heart attack, but I'm certainly it's not a ethical thing, like my kids being ' 'cause she's like I love animals, but I went vegan 'cause. They were, like you know. If you go plant based, you've got a really great chance of dropping your cholesterol. My kids have been bugging me, go vegan for like three years and stuff and not but honestly, not bugging me. She would just make comments every once in awhile, like not your mom, not your milk. Whenever I was drinking milk and shit like that, so after our tag, nutritionist was in the hospital room with being going like one hundred percent blah age menu, definitely time to change your diet as a gay you're right
and what were you eating before, like just fucking, not and like every ocelot away, and when you lost a lot of weight, remember you would do in a lot of juicing yeah. I was doing a bit of that which vegetable juices since told me, is not with the fiber, while leading the fruit and stuff? This thing thing is: is it depends on what use I mean if vegetable juices not really an issue bomb, but it is a high. I like it like I'm part and I'm a weight. Watchers ambassador the end, so that believe that, like the like vegetable juices you say that you really better off with like a vegetable smoothie right like we get the fiber. It is all about the smooth and keep some of the fiber in it in the weight watchers dot. They got presale that chance. You go by points and shit like some shit like you can eat a banana, no points. If you juice a banana or blended banana. Then it has points because they
and it's no longer about the fiber. It's all about the sugar at that age. Don't have any points anymore huh. Now they took points away for like eggs, turkey and chicken, which broke my heart 'cause. I used to love Turkey chicken. Then I realized that didn't love turkey and chicken. As much as I thought like I went on in order to after the heart attack, I read well, listen to it on tape and not even a tape, digitally Penn Jillette book Presto, but I we lost one hundred pounds after his heart ups. That's fantastic book, I'm sure you know that I had a similar issue or hard yeah, but he did have a heart attack. They were like you're on a birds and they were gonna, give me a bunch of by passes and then a friend His was like. Instead, all that, why don't you just try eating radically different? I could propose away for free, Ray Cronise as a diet called just sides, and so in pens book Presto, he details how Ray was like for the first two weeks: just eat potatoes. Nothing but but
did you have as many as you want it as many fucking potatoes you want, but you can't put anything on him. You can't fry him is just baked potato and eat it, eat everything and You can have nine if you're in a certain, but you can't put any butter on him- know solve nothing just flat out potatoes. So it's not information that sounded for Maine your diet. Well, I just come off the heart. Attacks home like I'd rather not die, so I'll fucking try how many weeks it take those potatoes two weeks straight up. Just potatoes am raw, not raw. Like uncooked, you can bake him, but you can't use anything to cook a meal entrapment in foil, with butter and salt or anything like that. Just flat out baked them and then eight hundred am you must be imported fuck! That's what happens trigger the diet, at least in my estimation, is that you, you're allowed to eat as many potatoes you want, and you think you like potatoes when I was reading pens, Boca rather listening to pens book. I was like. Oh my god. I can do that. I fucking dig potato, then you realize you don't like potatoes as much as you like butter and salt and
milk and everything that goes into like mashed, potatoes and stuff. So it's in the beginning, sense of satiety, because potatoes have some girth, dome and stuff, but there mostly water, so it's an excellent diuretic, so you're pissing like a fucking race horse and that's dropping weight more water out here, but some good vitamins in the skin as well lot of potassium. But some people like when I was telling him. You know the moment. You tell people what you're doing everyone's got their going advice about how to die and shit, and when I was talking about doing this potato diet, people in canny, potatoes, carbs little fucking nuts, too much it's bad and shit, but in two weeks of eating nothing but potatoes. I lost nineteen. Just like nineteen pounds dropped off a lot of water weight absolutely, but at the same time it taught me something more important than like fuck I hate potatoes. It taught Maine to fast, like it taught me to like. Now I eat a meal a day. I don't but in the morning when I get up, I don't listen to the propaganda of like you got a to breakfast and shit like that, not at all my body,
he has enough stored Enerji. I don't need to fucking, eat eggs and orange juice in order to fucking feel good in the morning. I just have to wait for my body to be like nothing, come in and great will look over the fucking stored Energean show like and I got a lot of so you doing like intermittent fasting. So what you doing it's, it's not so much intermittent it's like I eat once a day and then some days, if I'm like, don't feel the need eat like you go through it, you hit a wall every once in awhile, like generally about nine hundred o'clock, eight thirty nine! I get it dying of hunger. Am I in thanks things like fucking, quick fix it, and then I remember like just in ten minutes, it's going to pass and then ten minutes absolutely append talk about nine hundred in the morning yeah, so you're eating one meal. Typically dinner generally about three hundred o'clock in, afternoon, and then you go a long time before you eat again. Yeah, that's the way to eat man. A lot of people think that's the way to eat
I think so, smarter people than I liked him Ray who created the just sides died in Penn who followed the diet and stuff like they do the same thing, one meal a day, job pen. Not so I mean I I can't I'm trying to. I don't think he's down. One hundred and twenty one meal a day. I think he just eats better than I do like he was able to keep up with Ray's diet. I couldn't after the two weeks It was like ok now eat corn and I was like I've. Never eaten corn in my life. Wait a minute he's telling you just week or no. He was saying to add corn to the diet and they were adding more things after the first two weeks. It wasn't like potatoes now just corn now, so this just sides that's his hook. Is that you're eating the size sensually your eating everything, that's kind of it's all plant based and stuff, and so I couldn't. I was hoping that I could you know if I can go, the distance can be a vegetable that I fucking hate vegetables, and so I had to figure out a way to be be fucking hate fat dated so much. How could you be a vegan and hate vest
you find a very thin corridor in which to live and exist, scooping up that's a tofu, pretty much eating pinto beans, eating black beans, good source of carbohydrates, right what else you know what I've fallen in love with and never ate before my life for Chickpeas, chickpeas are great saw to great go to snack, fucking full of protein and in vegan comfort, food cook thing they use it as a versatile ingredient. So like if you go to one of my favorite restaurants in town is crossroads. They got like this. Will be going his place right. Is that the belief it is, I believe, Travis Barker, the drummer? He that's his places, I believe so pretty sure
they've got a meatball sub, there's good. I would I'd suck a dick for it, so good, supposedly mercifully that'll make you do that they just make you pay, that's very sweet of them. The good is good business model. It's supposed to be a very good place latest one about being place. Fantastic. They get this me, that's traverses, place tastes exactly is anyway, so about shot miles from here. Maybe a little bit more call follow your heart if you're been in that place. Yes, I have that's. Why I'm glad to read a to talk about the the diet yeah. I have some killer pancakes man, I don't know what they're doing kind of food do they're doing to make a vegan pancake takes a good in New York. They got a place in Brooklyn called Champs Diner, which is also like all plant based vegan food, but they do come Food like you know, like you, can get a like an impossible burger beyond right or like you're eating meatballs, and we think about it. You, like alright, the bread is most of it. The sauce is the next biggest part. And meatballs themselves aren't really that packed with me. It's much more breading, then fucking, meat and stuff. So all you have to do is fine
something that will stand in for the fucking meet drench it in fucking marinara sauce and put it between an ice off roll. And they use like ricotta like cashew ricotta, like kind of finish at all, it is fucking bliss dude, You know it's just like it's vegan comfort food, so you can't do that every day right, but it's nice to you know that if you ever like, I miss real fucking food. I want to eat a God, Damn animal, they can hand you something. That's like close to the approximate now the good, it is because I know a lot of people like fuck, veganism and you're. Absolutely right. It's no damn fun for me, at least, but after a month of plant Bay, I was on a series of medications after the heart attack and still them and it was on a dose of Lipitor, which is you know, cholesterol, fucking, cutter and stuff. Like that, so my doctor, It's telling about this potato diet and he's like. I don't trust this he's. Gonna do labs. I want to your meds, give me some your blood so, babies, are going to make sure you're getting all the nutrition and he's like you can't get off the fucking potato, I'm sorry! So he did my labs and k back and he was like you're fantastic he's.
On nutrients wise you're. Great everything across the board is great, except for cholesterol is like. Why did just have a heart attack and he goes now. Your cholesterol is in the toilet, he's gone so I need you to break your lipitor and half he's going. You can't take that much lipitor anymore. So he's like what have you done different as it was in fact potatoes go, so your cholesterol drop so radically that he was worried, yeah and then off. To take me off of my half. Have my purse, when is see. I don't I don't know your stand enough about cholesterol levels. This is what they told me almost, certainly that I found fascinating. I thought I was like this is lipitor. It's gonna beat up the cholesterol, his nose in your system for ever really really it goes yeah. I can loosen it up and move it about, but then we have to be careful, make sure it's loose and often globule cholesterol, so that it doesn't go into your fucking brain Jesus, hard pieces like No, I don't know if you ever pull like fucking grid off your teeth after you've eaten or something like that compact. It. You know that's plaque technically, I guess, but that's kind of shit, that's up in your veins, but that shit gets hard. It gets super
I'd like the the cholesterol that was blocking up my my man had to drill through it to get the stent in there and you keep that collect, forever now I can say that one hundred cent, but that's the way it was communicated to me 'cause. I thought I was like this magic drug will eat up the cluster of those. No, we have to be very careful with cholesterol because it moves throughout your system g. So I guess maybe eventually it moves out of your system, but if it's in you, blood system right, there's a chance that it goes up near your brain eventually. So maybe that's what they're trying to bullshit idiots talking about medical stuff. I know, but that's what it's all about right now, you can't you can't be an expert on everything Joe. Sometimes you have to like take shots in the dark yeah. So we know your audience, you know the audit is sitting there right now going like this irritates me. If they're not going to speak true the hard facts. Don't they understand medical science? We don't we That's why we want another time, but when you are you're getting a full blood panel done and all these different things are checking all your your. I also yeah. I know he's on the guy that with us yeah
g and not out but there are two pills that this ray turned me on to this doctor. I bet you know's name, but his name escapes Maine who formulated, the nutrients, you need. I guarantee you probably talk to this guy. His name escapes me. But ray was I get these supplements they'll cover everything he's gone, 'cause, you're, no longer a mediator. Anything you need that would come out of meat. Comes out of this. But you know it was kind of explained to me when I was like. I don't know like my kid was going. You could do it that I'm like it out like we were raised differently like granted. I wasn't raised with flaming Jan I did eat steak come through most of my childhood, but it's kind of a meat like it's tough to separate from something that you've lived with for so fucking long and she was like you gave up cigarettes and I was like alright you're right and stuff so it's nice, to be able to go to places where you can eat food. That's not just like grass roots and came right like that. Wouldn't you eliminate this is what I'm want to concentrate on, because I I she's there it
call dairy cheese, milk. I was drinking no bullshit, two gallons of milk a day, so that might have been part of the reason. I wound up having a fucking heart attack, so milk went away, cheese went away, animal food products went away so no burgers. I was a big burger guy, but I did like burgers: what about bread, pasta, stay pasta can stay, Boston, be pasta, foster can be vegan, but I mean you shouldn't you shouldn't overdo. It right can eat a fuck ton of bread and stuff right. You shouldn't know so that she and honestly they prefer. If a went away doctors aren't, like hey man, eat all the bread you want, but you know as part of weight watchers it's it has. Value to it that you can eat bread, but it takes up like a quarter of the points you can have, is it harder to do weight watchers as a vegan? Is it Ricky, no interestingly enough way. Watch is so fucking simple because they app it's all app based now like that was part of it. When I was a kid like at age fourteen I was part of weight watchers
I was like the lone male in the group and stuff? Now it's so technologically based that if you want food store and you're like oh, I want the close. But I wonder how many point you just scan the fucking bar code and it tells you- and so you can enter things like pinto beans boom. It tells you their zero points, so anything you enter. They generally have a value for even fast food chains. So it's this is shockingly easy to use. Take weight, watchers out of the equation, is being vegan difficult. Yes, like I watched my kid go through, I'm like you, have no choices, you're really limited to the places you can go in life and go out to eat, but if it's uh place between winding up in the fucking emergency room again and you know, eaten whatever I want to eat, which is what I did for forty seven years and then wound up nearly fucking dying closest I ever came to death, I'm ok to for a while for
I told the kid I'm doing it for at least a year, and if I can live like this I'll keep going so you cut out milk cheese, animal, docs and should be cut out sugar sugar. I cut out prior prior to this now going to first met. You you were candy junkie, yes, oh my god and look up still candy junkie at heart. I just can't revive anymore right I'll, always be a candy joke so from a dry drunk right now, I'm just like. Are you all the candy. If you presented it, but it was mostly the dairy, in the meat that that I had to say goodbye to cut out. Yes, that was the most the biggest percentage of your day. Probably yeah yeah, especially dairy. Now what about exercise exercise will, after the heart attack they want to ship for like the first month. So this is only three months ago that hard time it happened, so this is the doctor game of the ok. Then I was back to walking the dog up the hill. The way I always did I I haven't gone harder than that and I don't honestly, like I'm so fucking lazy at heart, that it did
like. I know some people like I love getting out there and fucking helps me think and my blood, but not me, I can I think, just fine at home smoking a joint sitting there fucking watching Cole, bear or something like that's where you and I separate you like the physical, like that you like rush you're, like the general in junkies, who have kind of late, raise their level, and so it's not enough for you to just sit in one place like you could do this and shocking that you'll do it for three hours, but then, after this you probably do something like Razzle bear fucking knife hunt a species of things, but I do run hills is that we do that run hills in the morning. That's how how far couple miles the most do. I'm real deep stuff. Do you listen anything or are you today? I did today I cheated a cheat when I listen to things
think it's cheating wives, in choosing to be alone with you supposed to be in a meditative state where you just pushing yourself at a certain pace and when you're listening to something especially something cool. It distracts you to the point where you hear how heavy your breathing, but you don't think negatively about it. 'cause you thinking about whatever the music you're listening to is like it's really interesting. It's it's a nice trick. 'cause. You can actually the work harder and not be bothered by it because you're they are so tuned into the music that you listen into or whatever it is. You really captivated with that you can keep pushing, but Most the time I like to do it where, on here shit, I just hear the pounding in my footsteps in my breathing and also I have a logical fear of mountain lions. So I want to be. Did you see that story about soccer yeah? I don't ask you to focus on me that I was terrified yeah and this is your id. They weren't like yeah, they weren't gone like a man. We my encounter mountain line. Do you did the right thing? They swung the bike yeah at first they tried to get big because I go to a place and
call the canyon ranch with the wife in Arizona there's like one trail, where they have a sign right at the gate. That's like, mountain lion area and it's got one of those little like graphic tutorials on what you're supposed to do with your body. If you encounter a mountain line- and you know you're supposed to big up The way they like Kamenova bears charging actually fucking big up at or some such shit. Something here that, like big up grab a stick, make noise and shit like that and that story those guys did exactly as told in the fucked off for a minute and then fucking came back and that's when they would start swinging the bike out. Yeah and the one guy took off the one guy his friend got bitten dragged and then he took off like he's going to get help, or I don't know what I'm going to do and the Mount line said fuck this going to go after you know and chase missed him chased him subway. Did you had one guy down? It didn't kill both guys fucked up one guy killed the other, but one guy was down. I mean obviously Just reading the story, I wasn't there, but one guy
down your goodness there with your delivery. I survived. He said that he felt the mountain lions fucking jaws around his head and then when it released to go after his friend yup, his friend ran in the mountain lion tackled his friend and killed his friend. Or just acting on the older just bit. Fucked him up man- and this was not even a big cat This is one hundred cat and it was a initiated, and it wasn't doing well was probably looking at old cat funeral or something Ferrell are all Ferrell yeah the wild but is I mean feel like I was the other word most likely just old and they're all fear among the bugger there in the wild, probably couldn't catch rabbits anymore and shit. Couldn't catch Dior was getting old. You can't catch a rabbit and going to go for this human with a machine earlier were so slow. We are so slow. Does that right? Oh my god! pass this human is a joke to a cat, but a deer. Deers are so fast, you ever see a deer.
I have run away from a wolf or something like that. Video got a wolf, but I've seen deers run away from us, they're all around our house to fucking yeah. You can't even come close to catch them. A cat could catch a person so quick and even if it will all right, so it's one hundred cat is still going the smaller than the dude that it's a talent did you ever get in a fight with a house cat. Never now I've never gotten a fight the house friend all animals, I am as well, but I had a feral cat eye. Is TIM they're all funded for on a show? No they're. Not all this is a. This is a cat that was actually born in the wild really. Yes, he was born in the wild and had to stay with him in a room to get myself used to him and get him used to me this pre internet too, by the way. So this is like back in the 90s, and so I lock myself in a bedroom with this kitten, and I just brought a stack of books put a mattress in there brought a stack of books just huh about this cat and every time I would get near this cat cat freak out and hissed at me and jump on the curtains and fucking literally like climb, the blinds screaming and hissing, and then I finally
get my hands on it immediately, start Perinton and given in 'cause, once you realize? I was trying to eat him that I was his friend. I would pet him and he would pearl. The nanny cat would prayer was crazy. Like I developed this bizarre bond with this cat because this cat was so scared of the world, I mean that scared of every action every time. No, eventually calm down to be like only one that could touch him. Though I was the only person My friends would come over he'd hiset them. He would wow like. Let him know like bitch shit is about to get really crazy, like I'm, not a regular cat, but I could go up to him and I could pet him? He was a feral cat. You know was my point, beginning s, I don't know what what did we were? Have you help I had to get it fixed. This is what was the yeah. I had to get him fixed and I had to pick him up and I don't know how the fuck he knew that something was going on Oh that's right, 'cause I was trying to get him in a laundry basket. I was trying to put in the laundry basket, because I wanted to bring him to the
So suddenly his buddy, who try, who trust, comes at him with a fucking kidding, not that deep into our relationship either because he's only like ten or eleven months old, he sees praying in my house Mannys lifting that detail up and just shoot and piss on my walls. I was like hey you fuck. Did he pissed all over the place by the time I I realize, like I had to get him to a doctor pissed house like ten times a day because they just passed in the house, and so I know I was worried like if you don't get him quick enough. I got it yeah I've yet to clean everything up to deep, clean all the carpets. If you don't get to him quick enough, he just thinks well he's spraying from now on, even after you fix something that can be a problem, so I tried to hold on to him and put him in this laundry basket and tude heat or be the fuck up. He taught my arms up. He just scratched me and Claude me, and he was remarkably strong. That is a little cat, and this was your friend like
become your body. Saying the same to me, I thought you were my friend bitch by trying something I know it you fucking prick, so I had to fill a pers a blanket on him. He Jason at me and trying to get out of the room. I had to throw a blanket at M and under the blanket to scoop him up and put him in the laundry basket, and then I slowly pulled the blanket out, so he didn't suffocate while keeping the lid down and then tape the with laundry basket up, so I could put it in my car and he wouldn't jump out my car and call my fucking face off while I'm driving just, let me see it in a chevy chase movies. Did you leave it at the vet and just walk away? That was a good friend on who has since passed on, and it was he was a really he that guy loved animals hit the cat whisper he what he did and now he knew how to take care of it. He knew I I told him the whole deal come in and, and you know he knew he knew how to handle it- he's only that I've ever had cry with me over what animal had a puppy that had distemper
friend of mine found these puppies at a gas station. Someone was giving them away and he took a bunch of only calls me up with his him and you want to pop either. At the gas station said. Yeah man bring that puppy over here man, the puppy, just after like a couple of days Is it being at the house? Would have these seizures like violent seizures? Would just lie down its eyes, would rollback and you could just padded a little bit. It would slowly come back, then it would be weakened delirious and it would know it would happen and then, towards the end, it was having them all day long. I mean it was just all day long and that's distemper, yeah, yeah, distemper. So how does it manifest again? It's just some horrible, neurological disease, that dogs get and if they don't get their right shots when they're young, they can get this and there's a bunch of different horrible reactions and it's fatal.
So I had to take him to the vet and the vet was like there's really nothing. We could do with him he's having Ceus having seizures all night and all night was awful and he's like he's going to die any. You know any hour now that we're going to have to put him down. So he put some town and he comes out in the hallway me night I held the dog I placed him down. I gave him a kiss and say goodbye and he put the needle in the talking and put the dog to sleep and we both went outside that he wishes Brian this week. You know those guys is the job he just loved. He felt loved animals when he had a Tana animals, man, he had cats and dogs and all kinds of and is killed by a drunk driver. That was, you know, yeah now yeah. It was rough house of House a rough one. I got a an email, I believe from his daughter.
The rough one- the super good dude man, the who are you cry more for the guy of the dog because the well, but you started with the dog, though you started, Interior dog- was a bummer, but it it was more of a bummer even the way he was approaching it. Just approaching it very humanly like most docked. I guess we're expected that like I'm sorry, this person is passed on. He wasn't calloused about it at all. You know his feelings about were super raw. That's why imagine I would be at the doctor just like I'm so pocket sorry to scare the out of me with marriage he he because we who talked to me about his divorce and you, if you just you just grab me a Grammy, goes, don't you get married, don't you ever to half joking and have serious but he's like trust me. You don't
want to do that. You don't want to have to go through this kind of a break up. He goes he goes. You got a girlfriend right now you break up with what happens. You get broken up. That's it you break up, and he goes you don't have to see them in every week for a year over and over again, whether just try to take money from you in line about what you've done, so they can get more money from you. He went through a bad one and I believe some of his friends went to real bad ones too, and just he was one of those dudes I was like you know, two thousand six hundred and twenty seven also like Jesus man this? Is a man of science is a doctor. He knows what he's talking about, and you know why wise man who a lot shit. So when he you know, I was a moron Sony, Grammy Liz, listen, don't fucking did you he's just he was just a guy that you know I mean I've. We firmly believe when it comes to there's this people that are just supposed to be doing what they're doing right
and he was a guy that was supposed to be working with animals like it. Just worked, man have the heart for images of veterinarian. He would probably seen how many animals die, how many animals injured and still the guys crime in the baby at the puppy is a baby dog. Nobody wants to see if they follow the rules about a chance, so that old guard is heart in the right place. That's the guy. You want to bring your animal to a hundred percent he's. Also. First got but every time we don't get my dog fixed. Why well, he said. Look, he goes. Don't let your dog have babies, don't be an asshole. He goes, but if you get your fix fixed. You gotta realize your dogs not going any testosterone anymore. It's going to be it's it's going to, the same dog and I was like really into the cat and so I got my dog faced and would not and listen to this man I got to fixed. I was trying to calm him down. He was a pit bull and it was very aggressive right when I, when it did calm down but immediately lost like most of his energy. He didn't just didn't,
have the same. The same energy anymore. I was calling bombed out. It was weird the yellow lab that I had to. We had to like when I first met Jennifer, my wife. She got pregnant like shortly after we met Allah yeah, that's how verrall I am. Like a like a cat. So you know we would never like. I never even owned a dog, so I was like we should get a dog to see if we be good parent. And so we went to the pet store in the Menlo park. Mall in New Jersey and uh look for yellow lab she had in her head she's, like idea lab when I was a kid and they are the best dogs for children. So let's go get a yellow lab. I'd, never had a dog in my life, so I was like that sounds great. I know what they look like, so we went to the pet shop, try to find a yellow lab and we found this dog that was blah and like a yellow lab in their marketing it as yellow lab, but she'd been left behind all the other properties of Ghana.
She been there. Perhaps a little too long like you, she wasn't a dog yet, but she was fucking on the you know: what was the Britney Spears Song, I'm not a girl, not yet a woman? That's where the dog was. She was too big for the cage right, but her face was pressed up to now. So we were like what about this dog in it was been price down. You could see like two thousand marked all the way down towards the direction of the naturally, so we got that dog, an you, never see it like. It was like something out of a fucking cartoon, be those were the ones that will I get out of this cramped ass cajun come with us out into the parking lot, this dog instantly bonded with us loved us, so much became so needy. We call that Scully we're big fans the x files so after a week of having that dog and the dog was like up in our grill all the time just like. Thank you. Thank you for fucking bring me out of there. Like you are my people and shit. We
like we should get another dog to babysit this dog, so this dog has a friend, so we want, instead of to the pet store where we went to a breeder's kennel like a pedigree place and they had puppies versions of fucking, yellow labs and they're adorable like fucking, ten of them falling all over each other. Like an animated like a Pixar movie, an Jennifer picks up one and bonds, but there's like this is the one. Let's get this one. I went over the counter. I was like alright man. We just bought a dog the week before six hundred dollars and even then I was like six hundred fucking Boxman. They throw these things out. You know we can get one for free and shit. But I was like I've never paid six hundred dollars for a dog, so you know I went up to the cow unexpecting? Well, that's the rate. I guess the going rate for yellow lab six hundred dollars. So I went up to the counter and I was like will take that one and the ladies like that, will be four thousand dollars and I was like fur all. I just want one she's like that. These are pedigree dogs and I just met, Jennifer barely newer, so I couldn't turn around and be like put that down. That's too expensive
to represent, so I was just like well, you're paying too lucky. We are stealing from you and we got that dog and to be fair. We name Mulder, cuz again x files and Scully Moulder and Scully was just big like happy heart that just loved was so smart and fucking thoughtful. He wrote my four best, movies. That's why he died. I made tuscan yoga hosers like without that dog riding for Maine. How do you write for you? It's a joke, show he was feral is it's just saying he was so smart. So smart, how smart buddy he's so smart. He wrote my last few screws joke didn't quite land, so it's missing something I wasn't paying attention. I didn't set it up properly, I'm not a fucking pro, but in any event he he was wonderful, but we got him clipped
His demeanor never really changed. He was always very low key. We call them kill right because you go to the other side of the bed and just look up like this yeah. I got my my Mastiff snapped it didn't really change. His personality stayed the same yeah. He stayed the same, but he was always kind of a mellow dog. We got a very big dogs. They don't like to do too much. We gotta rescue last year and a half ago that was like when the M older died a couple years ago. He was he made it to fifteen, which is like truck and dummies older for already raised, and for a big dog yeah. Pretty deep D'Action will stick around. You know fucking, like cancer, but a fucking big dog like that generally, don't make it past one thousand and eleven. So we got a lot of good years out of him stuff, but it was fucking horrible when he died. I spent last, two years of Scully's life. This is rehearsal for mold. Are there yellow lab? So what usually goes? First is the hips in the back legs, so Scully's back legs when she just,
rest of her body could work, but she was literally dragging her carcass. What was wrong with her legs? They just went doctors like that. Just happens, they're done and she was one thousand two hundred and thirteen, so she'd made it a while but they just took the work to stop working just give out, so the nerves a fire in the leg, stump, there's, no muscle, that's a common language, labs, yeah wow, so put a scarf under the back end of our call, the magic walking scarf and I would become the back legs for so she would walk and I would be the back legs and you know, get shouldn't this all over and stuff, but I dug the dog, so it was no big deal. So I did that all the way up to it when Scarlett passed away and then Moulder was always very healthy and fucking mobile and love walk in the steps uber but a dog Jen would take him up on Runyon Canyon and shut. Then one day his back leg started dropping and your fucking hard sex because you're, like alright Scully. She wouldn't that active. So when she lost her legs like as a bummer, but she wasn't like the runaround dog she used to chase moldy. Throw ball
mother would run after and chew just chase mold and try to bite his back legs to prevent him from doing it. Cuz she wasn't nearly as fast Mulder was the go out guy. He love to fucking be active. So when his back legs went, it was like heartbreaking and then he stopped around for two more years. It was literally two years of me: walk magic, walking, scarfing this dog, then got to the place where he did no it wasn't December. But when you're talking about it sounds so familiar. He would do that thing. This thing where you've got hello and this would go on for hours and you could tell it- was exhausting form any couldn't move, So you know everyone in the family was likes time to let him go, and this was like when he first lost his leg. But I was like a fucking shit me. If, like
If I lose my legs, you better fucking put a magic walking scarf around my fat ass and not fucking. Turn me over to the needle, and this is fucking family I held on to him for as long as I could until he got to that place where he was like an obvious fucking pain, and I I shot a video of it, my phone, I still have it and it's not. You know it sounds crueler sick, but like it was it was just a reminder because every once in awhile I got new eventually like we would have to put him down and like such a weird. Mission ship or one day, you're like I love you to death, and I love you so much after fucking kill you. So I had that video on my phone for the longest time so that when- We small hours the morning. I would wake up and be like you killed your best friend. I could watch that video and be like you have to. He had like he wanted to go. Start was sick, so the doctor came over. We got the vet to come over to the house,
and it was like a big deal, it was like we all knew it was coming and shit. I was flying home from a gig and I kept telling like Jennifer like don't do anything just like fries like I'll, be there as quickly as possible. And so like Doctor Kumar was our vet was you know, schedule to come over and and that last our was probably hands down the most of called out my life, because we all knew what was coming in your program just to stop that at all costs you program to keep people around. Yourself around and yet like we were just sitting there loving on him, knowing that, like by the time Dr Kumar gets here, it's all done. It was fucking hard. It was our last thing in the world to do what he still in pain the whole time. So, even though you knew you were doing the right thing, it was like I understand why that that you know got emotional, but vet
stuff, so any in any event that we lost that dog while ago couple years ago and I'm a 45th birthday, we're back doing a show at the count Basie Theater in Red Bank we're doing yoga, hosers the screening and we're shooting it for the kind of comic book men show, is driving down the highway in Middletown NJ, and I passed the place where we had bought molder. I was just like you know what man I'm forty five years old with grown ass, fucking man like I make my own money. I can do whatever I want, I'm going by a fucking dog, I'm going to replace that dog I'm gonna get me another yellow lab. Since then, right we got Louis, which is a chocolate lab and checking. My favorite is a little miniature dockson but like missed folder, and I was like I'm going to play some and then so I went into the pet store same place, the puppies puppies puppies, where we've gotten older and I walked in, and I didn't see any yellow labs and there's nobody at the counter. So I was like alright I'll get out of here in a lady comes out and she's like can help you and I was like
yeah it's like wow. I honestly I came looking for a yellow lab, but, like you guys, don't have any we have one in the back and says I okay can meet him. She said sit right down the put you into a little room and stuff like that. The bring the dog in and in my head, I'm like counting the money out. You know I'm sure it's the inflation is hit. The dog market, so it's going to be more than forty thousand, but I'm ready to fucking go and then they bring in this puppy balance is energetic as fuck. You could cut this dogs nuts off and it wouldn't have mattered, but he wasn't molder. He looked exactly like him, but Wasn't this weird lesson of like when it's gone it's gone and you need to she ate it more when it's there, because you know tell you this from a young age but like everything, everything dies and uh things. Fucking replaceable at the end of the day,
so is the Southdale playing with this dog. I was like it's not like it's not him. It's never going to be him an I would, Raise this dog is whole life expectancy, something else somebody else out. There wants this fucking hyper puppy. Not me. I took picture of it with my wife, and so I took picture of the dog and texted it to her. My wife instantly called you back be like to not buy. Can dogs. You can't do that. I said I'm a forty five year old grown ass man. I can do what I want. She goes. No. We have two older dogs at home, and it's be so. Unfair, to bring a new dog into the house, and she hit me on that leg gone like you know what you're absolutely right. She's like you, gotta wait until one of the other dogs dies, then you could buy a new dog. Is it fair enough. And two days later, my wife we right before we go LOS Angeles, uncharacteristically says: there's this dog in my twitter feed.
Look at it and it looked like this emaciated fucking look like the dog from the Sarah Mclachlan Song, like in the alms. Just then ask like the dog from the haunted mansion ride dog you see on a fucking can just like bones with a dog head on and shit I was like that's so sad. She's like they found this dog was tied up outside a kill. Shelter with the rope is trying to book, no all through the rope, and so these people they took it home to foster. They can't keep it? They already have six dogs, so they need a home for this dog and I'm like okay. What does that have to do with us and choose this like? We should be the home and like what happened like we can't get a new dog because it be unfair to the other two old dogs she's like Kevin. Look at this dog so we went over to Lady's house and saw this dog that sounded like the distemper case that you just grab the puppy. This dog was fucking dead. Three balls in the grave just weekly looked up at us and fucking weekly
it back down and shit. Look like hell. Look like honestly look like a skeleton with just a dog head like glued to it. Heart breaking you know and so instantly. Unlike dogs on death watch, we bring this dog home. It's going to help these people, you know, so they don't have to take care of yet another dog, but like this dog is going to die on, our watchdog is going to make it look. How fucking lethargic is when we picked her up. She felt like she was like twelve pounds, and this is a dog. That's mixed pit got pit fucking head hard as shit and shit, but she was all like. I may see it. We took her home after a week. Man, that's when she started like getting alert and shit and the vet had told me goes. I said: what do
Do for how we fat in roughly goes give her eggs as eggs. He goes yeah, MB, good, forgiver, protein or fat interrupt also be good for a coat or bring her her back. So alright, so start making eggs every morning should scrambled eggs and give her the eggs like suck it up and shit, and then I was like these eggs are so plain. So I start putting like bacon and cheese started. Making omelets for the dog and whatnot dog got fucking fat, quick, healthy. All the fur came back, took the dog into the vet there's this like what the fuck happen, this dogs dogs, like ninety pounds, I was like he said- to give her eggs. I've been giving her omelets every morning goes, I didn't say to cook the eggs I was like winning mini like you, just break an egg and put it in a bowl to fucking dogs eat it like you, may need eggs. I was like yeah. I got in a fight with my wife, many times 'cause. She was like you never made me an omelet and I was like well. The dog is dying here so that dog Weiner back to health. We named it mad Margen Marty and she, since we don't know our history, like she figure she six years old, the doctor guest she's, clearly a street dog and she lives
in her head. I guess the same way that that cat you describe did everything was fucking terrifying, took a long time for the Fucking Trust an she loves, fucking wife like she must understand that, like she was the one that fucking got her into the Saucon ship. So when other people come in the room blah? She goes fucking, nuts, 'cause, she's, very fucking, protective of the wife and shit like that she could fast, and recently we had an instant in the house 'cause. She doesn't get along with two other dogs, so we had to put up all these like what we call check Charlie's nasty series of dog gates, the dogs, could you have a female dogs they're all female three from the house that the I've had problems with on the pass females? Do not they don't give up. The alpha position like males give a like if you have a couple of males, will figure out not boss and the bosal run. The house like, I have two males one of 'em
is a hundred twenty pounds. He's is a master of and the other one is a she blew. You know English bulldog mix, they're very clear. You know, there's a this. One is way bigger right, there's, no issues who's, the boss, the ones the boss, but females- they don't they don't give up on that. Thank you. I, like I'm, the author, keep going after each other. It's really comment. It has a really common with females, especially if you leave me alone for any length of time they each other up. Man that it happened not on my watch then go. It happened, one step away, did it yeah. I asked I have two females was terrible. Terrible ours was ours happened when I was away. I was just going to show two three weeks goes in Vancouver. I did a few canadian shows and at night my kid called me and she was like Marty and check. He got into a fight and I was like wow and check e is literally Shimon. Adduction she's, a minute reduction and more is the size of a pit, so they've seen each other
walk with each other. We walk him in the hills, the walk side by side and ship. At the moment you get in that house. It was tough there are of while, because they want your love, your love feels so good. Like if you come over and massage them in another dog comes by. You might stop massage ing them and start massage that other dogs they'll attack. That dog, I'm not kidding, that's because I had dogs percent yeah, especially dogs, that have been mistreated so that yes, my dog that had an issue with this was also a dog that I got from the pound. I gotta couple from the power one from the street is covered in mange and I nursed her back to health in a similar story. Shoes two years old should Greg nipples, so she had had puppies Wait, wait, wait, wait! This dog has also extinct
standard extend extended. I said my might have the wrong to the vet said like that doesn't necessarily mean like in Marty's case. He was like I was like did she have puppies because it looked like she hadn't nipples, but he was like. No, it also some cases. It happens with dogs that are may see it, but I can't imagine a stray dog didn't get laid. You know yeah. I don't know I mean the the vet said, she'd had puppies, I don't know, I don't know why. I hate determine that. I think he had said, because the nipples there were hanging low, like that's, really Ios yeah that was like, but that do females like the mail got along great with both dogs. He had no problems with them, but those females around they would fight all the fucking time and they would fight whenever one of them, when someone come over to get pat like they got in a big fight once because the pool guy came over and the pool guy was like hey, what's up kids and he pat one of dogs and impact the other one, and so they going after each other. Like fuck, you no fuck, you and you know I get this. Call him on your dogs are about to fuck each other up over the pool. Guy
Oh my god, you herself, by the pool guy, so I had to keep the girls separate the we work, in a separate with gates. But you know somebody back and fucking up the two wound up in the same space, an fucking went out it, and so one dogs way bigger than the other, and so the big dog picked little dog up by her hind quarters are which and was like guy that Shego, like a dog, shakes a toy, but meanwhile Scheck use Little one is. She has no, which Napoleon Complex so she's got no idea of like you're bigger than me. She don't give a fuck. So as the dog as Marty is swinging, Shechita little dog Lou Bulldog Dog is swinging from side to side, beitner and then swing into the other side and partners wouldn't go down. Dude, like I imagine, if somebody bit me in the ass and shook me from side to side, but like you win, but this I was just like fucking. Those are awesome.
About the she kept trying to go right back out or so. When I came home it was fucking heartbreaking, 'cause, I heard they got in a fight and my daughter was like she's got stitches and stuff, so I was prepared for stitches, but when I got home it was like it. It looked fun terrible like she had she look like the fucking walrus from TUSK, like a Frankenstein version of her leg, how Is the other dog she add pieces of her like missing chunks out of it for sketchy and she was like she knew she got in trouble. 'cause Jennifer like put her into what we call chickens prisons, the other side of the gate where lowered dogs in the chicken and then you're locked in the bathroom. You could still see everybody else, but there's a gate, keeping you on that side of the room. So she went to jail for that and you can tell she felt fuck bad about it, but does it like no more about dogs that little dogs always going to remember that fight? Rather both can remember it. If you leave him alone, they're going to do it again. The girls
brought home an extra wife. How do you think that would work out? That's exact, see how it's like with dogs. How do you know that David told you that doctor Cragg my friend yeah yeah. He he just said you can have two girls, because they're just going to go out it. He more often than not it goes like you leave me alone? Have a nice big yard? Doesn't matter I going, I don't. I want to sit there. Why you sitting there? That's my spot. That's my boy. Dogs won't do that. Another boy, dog other, can do that they can fight, but boy dogs. If the alpha this is a cording to dog people. Not me, I don't really know what I'm talking about. But what the way it's been explained to me is that boy dogs, for the most part, would you know few exception, except will pick an aa will lead the pack and less he's challenged by a new dog or one of the dogs gets bigger or something happens. He the older, unless there's some sort of shifting of the chain of command, he will remain. The alpha forever is the alpha.
Is the big dog sat in know this about the office yet and with Scully? I was in again a new dog right, so I would go to let's collie and molder out and Scully would barge through the door right he's alpha. First, she which is the alpha. So I would. I would- and I didn't know this until later in life later in her life- what I would get like fucking shitty about like hey man, driving him first and so I'd hold her back and let him out and betrayal on her face and the confusion on mothers, face of like bro bro. No, no, no, no delpro! Let her go! Let her go bro funny how we attached his human characteristics to animals we decided we're going to stop bullying amongst it. Yet, like I know the order of things, you should go first, bullying in grade school, bad bowling and dogs. You ain't going to do shit about it, you just better. Let that go just don't want to fight with each other, but two dot. My two older dogs- they only ones that have issues marshals. The younger
you run circles around everybody. When I opened the door to feed them. The big one comes in first every time, if the little ones to close the door, he'll look inside so you're a I mean first, as was because it was clear rules, but I let them do it. They don't fight with each other. You know they they're they're cool with everything, but this is just the the the leadership but they've established, and it's one of those things that like get me in the wrong way. 'cause, I'm not an animal, I'm sad, I'm like I! They they've, obviously the system down, they've worked it out, everything's fucking cool, my friend, Whitney Cummings knows way more about dogs and animals than I do. She actually has like horse that she raises that's like a rescue horse. She rides it with no saddle and she has a bunch of dog, hot rescuers with somebody like somebody like gun horse. I think you know if they use from movies and stunt horses and stuff. They don't have one person who owns them, some horses get abandoned and she rescued this way.
Horse so very similar to what happens with dogs. Someone abandons a horse horse, get abused. I'm in fact, I was talking to cats and gone all the other day Two is one of the top USA, women bantamweight fighters, and she was talking about equine therapy to that she's worked with horses and takes care of horses and there's something about a human bond with a horse, you're petting a horse and riding a horse and feeding a horse is like a very good love bond that people develop with this, but in Whitney knows a shit load about animals. My point and when I talked about her dogs, she's like she was well on the boss. She goes. I don't walk around them. I walk through them. I walk through them. There they're out of my fucking way, like we have a real, clear, like there's a power structure in the House, Whitney's the top ball, us and all the dogs have to do- is deal with her, so she's like she's the awesome out of a hundred percent. She pushes him out of the way she decides when they eat to make some sleeping patterns like she, she
oh really yeah she gives them rules yeah tell us a lot of structured gangster. Yeah yeah she's she's, not! I would not want to be mothers in that way, but you are all your get. Your thing is actually like dogs she's, like they're, not people, we attach the human characteristics and needs to them, and that's not what they want, what they want it's order and they want you to be there want love and allow. Affection and they want exercise and all those other great things in good food, but they also want order and her Where is she's the fucking boss she's? I guess that makes sense. It only makes sense. She's reader get loaded of books on it. I've read a couple books like way way back in the day on dogs, I read some books on dogs, but I don't know enough My information is species picked up from fucking vets and also probably a lot of theories that I stitched together for me to dissertation the animals like fucking crazy. Do you give your dogs, voices and shit like that voice is like? Do you do the dogs life for your wife and stuff, like I'm, always like? No, you don't. I do sometimes for Marshall 'cause, you so silly
because it's such a silly dog, so you'll be like oh you're. So we don't we're going to do there. You go bug in my voice for Scheck. He is. I am a huge checking in my world. The little duction calls me the man she doesn't know my name. She just knows me as the man she knows. My wife is that lady. So she's always like the man is home. Oh, I love that man he's full of pets and food 'cause. I I wonder how they view. May I do they view me as an AL. Because I'm the guy that's like I'll. Take you out for a walk. I'm going to your voice is deeper, your larger, an would be the most intimidating. If you had to fight to the death, they don't see me like that. You never even see me be mad, as I said, you know, and you to hear your voice yeah, but that her no excitement with my wife in the like a navigation. You guys are arguing yelling at each other for sure, but the fact that you have a deep voice made that it that it's shows your mail. That's enough for them to not yeah but alright, but let's say like Chucky. I've had for thirteen years over thirty.
Teen years, this little dog nose like I got him wrapped around my finger to make them and do anything. I want the way you talk and where you look, if a guy the size of Bron James, is right next to you, with his fucking, crazy, deep voice and super powerful body, and he talked to that dog. That dog would listen to him over going to be like that's the boss, maybe like finally, a real man's voice. Well, it's just one hundred percent, no doubt about it. That's a way, bigger organism that dog and it's talking with his deep voice, and it has confidence like yep whatever you need, gonna lay down right here, but if you were like some little what's that fella a small persons, Name Ervay Villa Chaise, Diplo. No, no! No! I meant like very thin Wesley, Tony twenty. What time is love so when Tony as close as twenty, let's say that- and he tried to you- Know- talk the same dog in the same room, the dog be like dismissive like something you still Lebron James, give me direction
you call that a you call that timber I might be able to eat you. So I think, like with, with in case she doesn't leave any room for any grey areas. She runs the roots, but she's super affectionate with her daughter. So these pictures, Instagram are hurt cuddling with her dog. She she clearly loves dogs but she's until its cage to the Bush is like how to take it in your fucking cage. Some people sleep with their dogs and shit, which is cool, but the dogs are farting in your face and stuff you're trying to sleep in there snoring, like your lose to sleep for a dog, and how about all that? I don't know. If that's the move, bro, you literally cried about a puppy, but I know, but now you're going to tell me, like I draw a lot of dog farts on care, how fucking cute you have your own bed dude! It's over! There you go over there, I'm in here little becoming better with you. Take their dog shit smeared pause and rub your sheets with them and touch your pee
oh ok, so that's part of it. That's part of the deal. That's why they don't sleep in the bed, man's ridiculous, like a little sleep in the bed with us that she got very short. Hair too, when I was in high school, my dog got fleas real bad and I had fleas in my carpet. It was fucking rough man I would go, through the house, and I would find fleas on my calves, like in the walk on my carpet from my bed to the bathroom. In the hallway. I would have fleas on my leg when I lived with my parents in New Jersey at twenty one Jackson, ST we were cat people, turn out flea mother fuckers around here comes watch this I am about to pull out my flea, Dick and throw on the table against your own fleet. We had cats and the cats. A lot of them are outside cats, so they would come in with fleas and we'd never had pets. When I was a small child, we didn't start getting. Cats in our house tell us about one thousand two hundred and thirteen or something, so my mom like having no prior experience with cats and stuff decided that, like they flee problems, are too much. We have to give the cats baths with. You know: fucking, flea, shampoo
and stuff, so you would do that and cats don't like to be anywhere near water and shit like gravel. Oh, my god, it was terribly get scratched up. Well, I know because my mother also insisted that I clip the cats toenails first. She wanted them like Declawed knows it. You can't do that. Then, like cats need their fucking claws in nature and shit she's like well, you have to clip the cats, Conan, toenail They do that divide all the time. So you know you take off the hook. Point partement, and then you probably don't like that they don't like it, but they like it better than if you took that fucking claws out altogether and shit. So I used to bathe a cat and then, when you bathe in the cat with flea shampoo, every fucking, flea, comes to the surface to try to live, and so they would fill the fuckin sink. I just in the water and they are dying in the water, because the shampoo is in the water as well, but my mom would always take it a step further. She would give me a set of tweezers and she would be like get that one and I would fucking pull flea off the cat and you have to press really fucking hard 'cause they're kind
flat to kill him. Otherwise they just jump away and then come back to the cat image. Try. That was like my. It wasn't a set schedule like every Tuesday night. I bathe the cats, but once a week my mom would be like you have to pay the cats so once that including the d fleeing, did you ever get rid of the fleas? Never never will got rid of the fleas where with is the of the yes, that's a like. It was the the nor Easter of ninety. Two on the EAST coast, where this big storm like it, was kind of like a hurricane sandy but though not as big and our town got flooded, including like our neighborhood, and we had like thirty outdoor cats that my dad would feed. We were finding those cats for, like weeks after the flood people would be like. We found six of your cats under our house more like they're, not cats number one there alive or drowned dead lot of. These poor cats are like on fences, I had that was all maximum impact very theatrical. We found a few
You like holding on defense is, you know like did escape. The flood waters was fucking heartbreaking, smart ones went up in trees, though, and they stuck around and lived, but after that flood, no fleas. What so ever but not nearly as many cats either that might help us Christ, yeah, Rivercat guy. We always a dog person. I've always had cats yeah I've always had both much that's why? I really don't want to die at the paws of a mountain cat. Well, I just know what they are. National they're super predators, the catch deer their face when they kill deer with their face. They they use their face to kill a deer hi. They they bite in the neck they tackle it. Take it down, that's why mountain cats are scary, their unbelievably powerful high, this guy Donnie Vincent in here yesterday's outdoor film maker, and he was talking about a cat that these guys had haunted and killed. That weigh two hundred pounds and it was two years old.
Sounds it been eating, so many deer just that it was just massive jacked fucking super predator, just roaming through the forest and ask those guys in Seattle that survived survive the one guy that survived the one guy that died from that attack? The mountain bike attack their fucking terrify. Flying animals. Why so do you think they attacked the people just because They were fucking hungry. Yes, it is just Who is emaciated. I think that's exactly tried to eat them. He wanted to eat them. He was starving and so he knew that they were an organism there weren't a normal thing on the diet, but it was so risky. It was so rather a hungry that it was willing to take. Those risks is willing to go after some people, even though the people with sling by Garrett and what has you that was part of a story that like got me the most so by his going in because you're like that's what I would do. I guess I would swing the bike and you would think this bike will save me. But no not brings back to my story about the house.
That when I threw the blanket on dude, I couldn't believe how strong he was. He was so strong 'cause. He was fighting for his life. He thought I was going to kill him, so I'm trying to stuff them into this laundry basket. He's going crazy and I was thinking what is this cat way Eight pounds, like maybe eight pounds on terrified of all of this, is catchy jugular floor. Compton that it is, it yeah be hard. What I mean you put your hand on and stop the bleeding aside getting kill you like a lion. Kills you what, if it usually what if it got both cloth, sets of claws on what are when a tire or other lines onto no shredding it in so many different directions. Really sites mostly give him to kill by how the general scratches it's. I know it's very there's something gets killed by a house cat there right here. Here's a funny situation, you're fucking, a house cat and it reaches back and claw,
into your femoral artery? You should let it go. It's clearly not consider at this point. Clearly, if you fought to the death with a house cat, I would bet on you. You would win, but it was the odd man, but it would be, but what the force that you can generate is lethal. The force that it can generate is ferocious, but non lethal, like if you put me in a room with a cat, I'm coming out of that fucking room, one hundred percent of time with a house cat, it's going to be dead. He killed our house cat yeah, but it's going to fuck me up in the process in Walker. How many get scratched up I'm going to bloody hands? I might get my face clawed up, but I'm going to kill. It gets to half my size, I'm dead. Is that right, my size, yeah fit not even one slash four of my size. Let's say it's a fifty cat, I'm fucked 'cause, it's too powerful fifty pound cat, It is like one hundred and fifty pound two hundred pound man, plus they have fangs they have claws.
It would be much stronger and faster. You wouldn't be able to stop it from biting you and clawing at you. It would be too big and if you got to one hundred pounds you're fucking dead, if it gets to two hundred pounds, you're super dead, you're dead, quick, it will crush your head. It's going to grab ahold of your neck. It's going to crush your esophagus crush your windpipe, and it's going to it has sensors in its taste. Like certain certain big cats, they can feel where your veins are, with their teeth. Their teeth have like a sense where, where you know like, feel like a hard piece of something like maybe right now a crab or something like that little piece of shell gets in there or you can kind of move that shell around inside your mouth, while you're chewing- and you get the shell over Here- that's sense of moving your tongue and knowing what that cat has that without without Fang,
and knows how to hit like an Antelope jug aurelion when it bites into something to say good afternoon YO where the blood is, it feels where the veins are, but it doesn't not the blood right. It's just like. I know that if I break this down, this thing will stop moving and I can eat it. It's mostly cut off the air. If you see mostly, what they do most could do is crush the neck. There is more that that it is like cut? You like a knife would cut your jugular. It's mostly crushing every if you, if you had the presence of mind like let's say this thing, is crushing your windpipe. Can you read shut up and choke a cat to death. I don't think so why? Because I think they're too strong. I think we need a strong there too strong, so would be one that you or something or it would too much muscle around much muscle both what, if you put your fingers in his eyes, that would be one of the only things that I could think might have effect, but it would probably have a second one as a second likely, you jammy finger up the cats ass. At least it stops. What it's thinking about son are going to get away.
I don't think that they, so that's that's. What I do is my last few rattles dude no way a few feet. Let all right in the same way that little kitten was attacking. You is like I'm a you up, I would leave. This life in the mouth of the big cat. With my fingers up it's ass. It would know that I is there before I left this fucking world, because if you stick your finger up a dogs ass, it breaks its concentration, doesn't no! No, that's an old wives tale. You ever see two pit bulls fighting each other. Stick your finger up there. Watch what happens. You're holding your finger in the ass, the dogs biting another dog that was happening, nothing. They don't do shit with each other. No I've always read that if you stick your finger with dogs, so instantly stop what it's doing. If you got a bitch ass dog It doesn't help us and drive. It ain't the dog do. They are certain dogs that are going to hang on they're just going to hang on, and you
so people have the presence of mind. I know your fingers in my ass, but fighting this other dog is the most important thing in the world. You want a want to pet, very driven your cat may want to kill you study says I fucking buy that in a heartbeat. I believe that they would absolutely kill you if you are big enough or if they're big enough, rather look at the photo that used one percent, would kill you if they could as the Joker of cats what the cat yeah, if you, if you were, the size of the cat in the cat was the size of you. You'd be dead. The house percent one hundred percent. What have you words friend from the beginning in ways that they don't have friends like that, like I have a joke in my act about how you could have a dog and have a pet hamster and that hamster could live a long and healthy life in the same house running around that. If you good dog and he trained that dog? If you got a cat that lives in the house, the hamster hamster has an hour to live. If it's lucky, there's no such thing as a cat. That also has a pet hamster. That's a dead animal. Next to that cat, they kill everything, everything they
canaries, lizards. Whenever the fuck you leave around that they can kill, that's what they like to do like to kill shit. Why do we have this relationship with them because they are small and like this, which is where the bitches of the cats we feed give the free massages, they don't do anything for us all. They do is curl up to go and will I need to touch me and you only love. You too didn't say he loves you if you die the first thing they happens to you when you die. Is the cats eat your face that's true. They get hungry. They start eating your lips if they can't get to anything, yeah people to find dead bodies, but it's nearly killed by stray cat left covered in blood, because cats are mean and awful, that's an honest headline. Wait. A second wait, go back to what we said before we read that which part I don't know the thing you just said it was shocking yeah. You totally took my head out the game, but it was about the talking about again dogs, the cash. Now, if the cat was as big as made, the cat would give you one hundred percent you have a cat, was
but what about a dog his dog was as big as me. All dogs can be giant and still be your friend. That's why a woman? It could be like ninety pounds and have a two hundred mastiff and that dog to listen to her. She raised that dog from the time it was a puppy and and write it like Khaleesi rush product if she wanted to totally but data toggle. Listen to her. If you have a cat that big, like you, better hope that that cat just decide, let's not kill you 'cause one day, it might just get bored and they're, not planning ahead. You know they're, not investment bankers, just don't like the way you're moving one day, just jump on you and just fuck you up and kill you. It's true. I've been hit by cats like not like in the face, but like you're sitting there, and then they left Yeah, no good reason. So, if you were, if that cat was eight times its size, did you see that the guy who was a longtime animal trainer, trained lions and it rain. This line. Look for like ten years and he's in the pen with the thing in the thing just looked at him funny and the guy starts backing up. It's like, oh, no, when he runs and this line just
cases after this motherfucker grabs him by the head and drag them around, and apparently survive the lion. Let him go and somehow another they got. The line away from him got the guy to a hospital, but he was an old Other guy, I want to say, he's like deep into his 60s, and this line was dragging him around by his fucking head, and this is a lie and then he had trained in that happened. What's your name, Melanie Griffith like her mom, to be hold the hand written was interleaved with wild animals, lions yeah, I think Melanie Griffith or scratched child as she and her early teens are sorry that she had to have. You know facial reconstructive, small, really, I believe so. Whoa. I never heard there's a movie that they ship with like they should. I forget the name of the movie, but they shot like the movie of them, interacting with documentary, but I'm living with big cats yeah when you,
the video online, it doesn't even look real it like we don't win win is a real, that's, really Melanie Griffin with lions and tigers and how many different cats they have there's a lot right. I want to say there was five of the company to assess people and the cat's in big cat experiment did to pigeon. The growth is a look at the arctic region is a wizard with that group will pull it up, so we could see the photos. It's so preposterous. Look at that! That's crazy! That's crazy! Is she looking at fund that looks should not be the way life? Is you imagine if you a burger and you broke into that Fucking House hole The shit! What a mistake! Imagine breaking your house and you see a six hundred pound african male lion. Just looking at you with that gigantic, head of death. FUCK man, the bizarre tale of Melanie Griffith and her pet lion? Do they talk about the attack?
but Lugar spitting water into the big cats and then in the family was ever injured by the lion? No one would buy that line by that one Neil, but Neil certainly could have killed any of them in a moment's notice. At one point, he did attack RON Oxley his owner during a dinner party at his home fuck. All of that Sunil the family went on to adapt numerous big cats which results in a series of serious injuries. Now, fifty seven years old, Melanie has learned from the experience and runs a sanctuary runs a sanctuary for thirty two big cats. Oh my god, look at that thing on the desk that is so insane. First of all, doesn't thing need exercise just to keep it shit together. Look at the size of that fucker unless you think you gotta feed that guy does a lot dude an only meet the no they're, not like a dog look at how tall Y is in the fridge, huge animal man and that's the point where I'm like,
not working here anymore. It's just laying around their house look at the fucking muscles on that thing and you think they're, like cats like will they only shit weather post a shitty imagination where that shit sorry wants the thing about the size of this cat? I mean this is because it's so big it must be a thrill to be around something that could just kill you at any moment Only lions in particular are pretty cool with people yeah, that's nuts. There playing the lion hazard by the legs she jumped into the pool and some fake biting her fuck all that everything about that picture. Put that on a t, shirt those words. Are my parents look at her, they were friends. Do they were buddies? Look how young she looked. She looks she's a kid that she's in her teens. At this point, she has a giant line in our yard, find the their cooler was thorough, apparently than tigers. Tigers are a little sketchy, are nine years old sketchier. So damn it like you,
when easier time only and then they would it yeah. This is I'm talking away out of school, but what I believe is the cases male lions are mostly there to protect the pride, the most be there so they're, not the hunter right there, the bigger ones, the females do all the hunting look at the size of that female my God. What's going on there in the movie, it's a I can hear the movie ends with them is what the link, what's this close call below, so it's biting her. I mean it's got him out there on the ribs. Is it actually hurting their system? Look happy. I'm not showing it wow. This is crazy. Alright, this is fucked. So this was in the movie. They were freaking out to the line was biting somebody. It says the father refused to yell cut, Are you like? This is real, my god? No blood was drawn in the lion, grabbed her and pulled her.
Back. So the line was just fucking with her, but it is dangerous. He was once cloud to the face during the filming that required required search the story that I'd heard. If she was closed, I fucked it so we're responsible. You know, there's several lines in this house in a such as ones on the lines is, there have blinds just run and- and I think they picked some of these. There were lines that came from like so yeah at seventeen million dollars in the movie, and it brought back to us to bargain roar. Yeah after this podcast get ready for another fifty bucks and then that's seventeen, how much seventy one seventeen million dollars in nineteen seventy one. This is a nice way to launder cocaine, money, son, that's what's going on there. What is that today, like eighty million dollars billion trillion? What I was saying was, I think, what happens is that lions, the male lions don't hunt, they usually just eat the kill. The female lions Hunt, they they're doing all the hunting, but with time
here's the male lions hunt like there are hunt and they don't they don't operate in packs. You know they're not later in the band yeah, okay, yeah they're, not that they don't they don't operate the same way lines. Who don't have a pride? You know, I don't think I think tigers pretty much on their own. You know, I think the females take the cubs as long as they can, but I don't think they they have these big. I could be wrong find out if I'm wrong, but I don't think tigers operate in like like that kind of a group. I'm in a world where, like I've, got a miniature dachshund. That means that somebody genetically made that dog smaller right. Well, we say genetically they're, not doing it through a laboratory they're doing it through selective breeding and it's remarkably effective, and then You do that. I just needed that to get to this point, can you do that with a tiger baby tiger we could do that's what happened all house cats have come from some kind of wild cat that we turned into a domestic cat and there's a bunch of different varieties of cats.
Difference between cats and dogs is at all dogs come from wolves all of 'em everyone, every dog, every dog started as a wolf TIGERS did not live in permanent groups like lines do for the most they live solitary lives except when females are raising Cubs, although rarely seen the term for a group of Tyga. This is a streak dope where it is a strict tigers, a murder of crows. That's dope my trigger. When I was a kid now, I could tell her mom. If there was another one would be a streak of tigers, tigers, fuck things up man, they all things up. All the mails hunt and they're they're fast animal man was this. Was this guy v? It's on you to He got fucked up in this movie is also roar. This is the whole movie. It's on Youtube. If you I just randomly clicked with Really I would be in the movie is about how they have these big lots. What the it seems like a good insane movie, it's called the most dangerous move.
Ever made by my guys, guys, an idiot and when you say they said he's a father in the cut that was Melanie Griffith's dad was directly next to this is Kerr. Is there off these lines are fighting for dominance in this guy is running around in between them, while there sing a shitty movie so crazy. Ok, it's like fuck! You bitch standing business- oh my god, just wanted to know that that little tree branch was not going to stop them. Jesus crisis, what's with the fucking blow up because it- each other up. Man there biting each other and fucking each other up: and this was a movie that was meant to show how the guy was a roar- is one thousand nine hundred and eighty one american adventure, exploitation, film, written and directed by know Marshall producing starring Marshall and his then wife Typeahead because during hundreds real
Life daughter, Melanie Griffith and Marshalls, real life, sons, John and Jerry. Oh, they were Brady Bunch type family. The film follows of family who are attacked by a range of ravening jungle, animals at the secluded home paper. Irish thought this was documentary. They were literally making a movie with fucking real lion about how lions were attacking people. Send. Seventy members of its cast and crew being injured by the many predatory animals used in the film, including its main stars, sustaining life threatening injuries ranging from bone fractures to scalpings and gangrene. Much of the footage cap during the injuries was included in the final cut of the film salting in real blood on screen. It has been consider the most dangerous film shoot in history wow. Ok, we need to do a fight companion. They had tigers as well leopards or
wars with those jaguars are leopards. Do you know the difference to look at the tiger? They don't no one lives looking for part of the world, but he just he just jumped in the boat yeah congratulate three things. They had him in the face. Well, they have to. I think you have to stand there, get it to think who's boss. Is that a panther? Of course it is fuck all this all these people doing the tiger, and now the boat sinking you fuck, you fuck it e fuck's, his life of pi. Oh my god. Look at that thing. It's so big Do it for the computer, so yeah. So what will do is one day we Do a fight companion put that movie, save it do we're doing roar yeah do roar he in trouble for that get trouble for a fight companion for or not this people that do things like this. Now totally it's. What is it considered commentary from reviewing? It needs to be seen that needs to be heard. I'm completely
locate it. I thought it was a documentary but they're. Actually they were trying to make a thick of narrative fiction there. I didn't even know there was a documentary. I just do that. She had lived with lions and I'd seen it in a magazine article or something or another line real dad. That's a step by step. Dad is fucking, crazy Could you imagine your step dad? I think Jamie get in there with a lion, but you put the evil on me, Jerry, oh, my God, before the movie look at all the cats in the room with her, I don't know how many can do all all that and they were crazy. The cats are like confuses flock by the rolling cameras as well yeah in like what is this all about yeah they're horrible. It's so I mean. Does the core? That's a clean up crew for the world. That's what cats are there out there taking out, as in as many of those zebras are water, Buffalo or whatever it the the they can, and so that's what they want. I do all the time and if you
feeding them, and then you just have a meter yard. They don't even do anything like you. Gotta exercise the fuck out of those girls to keep them from that Kilts lust, that's in their body. Like, they evolved over millions of years to get to this point. Where this so this enormous hulking, supernaturally, powerful animal that kills things with its face and you just take that away from them. So you're going to be in the pool with us, you should be in r movie going to start off in this boat, come on hop in the boat, pretend to fight no like what pretend ran his cash when the fuck do the antelope show up, so I can start jacking fools. Would you Would you agree that so should do more outdoorsy activity that may ie running? I eat you gone hunting and stuff like that, your Chan, This is of being eaten alive are far greater than mine, oh yeah, one hundred percent. I mean it's like surfers,
I'm in a zero percent chance in most of my life and getting eaten by a shark, but I have friends are surfers who serve all the time and they fucking love it and they're willing to roll that dice 'cause. They like surfing that much and I'm like you know you can't get bit by a shark. If you don't go in the ocean, and they're like we've got this shark thing figured out and defeated: just don't go in the ocean, they say it's worth it I gotta tell you man like there's a bunch of bad ways to die, but I always felt like the the most in dignity I would ever feel in death was. If I was something else, is food. It's one! Nothing if I'm like. My body goes into the earth and Vulcan the worms in the grass and shit like that. But to be someone fucking meal is so it temporary. A permanent solution to a temporary problem, your life for their meal of the moment and they're, just going to shit you out in a couple hours and That's why I think it's hard for humans get their head around being eaten by something 'cause like no. I
two special and then they're just going to put me out, but that would be the indignity man is like fuck they ate. Need to stay alive. I guess, but then it's not. Guys sustained, am forever like. I sustain him for a couple of fucking hours and they ship me out. You know that that is how it works. Right, yeah, It's very disturbing scene images of humans that have been eaten by animals. I've never seen any, and I don't want to anyway, so this figure is starting to move toward a keyboard, like I don't know classic one of a body that they found that bears at Eaton an I was horrific, it's just crazy look at. Is it even raise human anymore? I mean you know what it is, because it was still wearing sneakers and still a neck half of its pants on, and it's still like you know the one yeah you could see the thigh bone. I mean the the the meat from the. Phone it be completely stripped off and it was just nothing but the thigh bone, and it's just horrific.
You gotta realize, like those things man when they get of you, the amount of the amount of power that a bear could generate specially a grizzly bear. My friend, John saw Grizzly Bear kill a moose by swatting it swatted. With its paw and broke its back a moose I mean Second deadliest animal on the planet is a big. Is it really yeah right after that? Crazy? Nobody thinks about it, because when you think about the moose, your local iraqi watch, people hippo, is the most your son will to man on the planet in terms of like how many people he killed them. All second is the the moose. What part of the deer family, let's crazy, they're, the only dear really that will regularly rush people. I want to be anywhere near to moose during the rutting season. There's that but really more imp, Currently. Is you don't want to be near a cow and she's got her calves. See video of that online same thing with grizzlies.
The real? The real fear is not running into a male grizzly. The real fear is running to a female with cubs. Get some lose. Will they just they don't want you around? You might be a hunter. Maybe they seen someone shoot an animal before. Maybe they saw someone their family gets like that. Little cat, just like shoot, suddenly like to kill me up, even though your buddies, but it has cubs if it has cubs band there there on fucking, full red alert all day long because they get eaten all the time their cubs get eaten by other bears. Do is so fucking, weird it's like an animal has enough sense to be like some things here, I'm going to protect my kids and we just watched footage from a movie where the guys like close to that lion. Honey, spit water, well, yeah, because we're softap and we love the thrill of being that close to death and
injure. I do also so now you're a smart man. Now I'm a chicken man knows what you're wise men courage as well. No, no love you don't is! That is not true! You have courage! You just choose to not put yourself in dangerous situations all time you never taken this path in life and become this guy. If you didn't have the courage, yeah, absolutely of courage, but you just smart enough to know that you're not like a physical person you're not into you, don't want to do those things and you definitely don't want to be around some fucking giant ass cat that can kill you. It's not a matter of being a coward, so matter being smart, that's true! But if every so that's a matter of being smart. Now you have everything collapses and shit like that. Then I got no livable skills. No one! Does your ready to fucking take to the hills with the fucking bow and defend yours? Just like you are how many hours do I have you know how long can I live with these arrows? You know what what happens if I break one then down down to twenty arrows, how many? How long can I have twenty arrows, how many things are going to keep an amount that they have to break into a Cabela's steel,
arrow shafts figure out. They were gonna. Gluing machine learn how to restrain a bow with that one of the one of the riser snaps I gotta get some spare both somehow and have them laying around. I'm not doing well, man, I'm going to be real skinny, I'm going to miss a lot, I'm not going to get enough food, but you know it's going to happen? You're going to be like at least I didn't die years ago, like Kev 'cause, he no, but skills whatsoever going to be one of the people that restart civilization. Three o'clock, no yeah! No do you know there is this. Is this is lame to whatever ones like this sucks? Is your fault you? He started civilization like I tried what's going on right now in Hawaii, yes, fairly minor, what is in terms of all can't about kind of activity in terms of the world like there's a will, there's giant events that happen every you know, hundred thousand eighty thousand, whatever all over the world and the giant events. The super volcanoes have been responsible for knocking people down to an estimated. What was the name, something like seven thousand seven thousand people
somewhere. It was maybe a couple one thousand and seventy thousand years ago is that where I'm getting December seven from- but it is a super volcano that the human population killed everyone, except for a few one thousand people. And there was this- was somewhere around- I think it was six thousand and seventy thousand years ago, Ok, like event, seventy thousand, roughly one thousand reproductive people rely. One thousand people left seventy thousand years ago. One thousand that was the last of the humans and they re populated from that number to Us1 says it was as low as four thousand and forty people. Maybe so it's just a references biblical where they have this information. Well, listen man! If Yellowstone blows we're dealing with the exact same situation again most of North America is dead. Yellowstone is a super. Volcano wow might hit as low as what went to JFK conspiracy.
Well, we've wax, so we can win. Let's open TWAIN gently once in our history, the worldwide population of human being skidded so sharply, we were down to roughly one thousand reproductive adults. One study says we hit as low as four thousand and forty, come on it can't be right. Well, the technical term is forty breeding pairs, children not included more likely, there was a drastic dip and then five thousand Ten thousand bedraggled homo sapiens, struggled together beautiful little clumps, hunting and gathering for thousands of years until in the stone age we humans began to recover, but for time? There says science, writer, SAM Keen, we damn near, went extinct, and that is because of a volcano. It's amazing! What is it, what can lava blocks? The sun blocks, the sun, everybody runs out of food. Everything goes extinct is the matrix. It gets really fucking cold. Oh my god, look at very, scientists. So look at the difference in Mount Saint Helens little Fart, Bassu veusz. Seventy nine
so the to buy super volcanoes, the one that happens seventy thousand years ago, yeah so is a mess around for Mount Saint Helens do Massive super yeah. I remember that captured my imagination as a kid I was like we got volcanoes on this bitch. Well, Yellowstone is the spooky one 'cause, that's super volcano. That is just water. No! No! It's not Yellowstone is what they call a call DERA volcano. Meanwhile, what what is is it gets to this peak and the eruption is so violent. It flattens out of the mountain disappears and they just left this crazy. And so when they were first looking at it, they were trying to figure out what it was they didn't know if it was an impact. Crater was this crater from and then they We started using satellite imagery, I want to say like twenty years ago, so they realize that it was a supervolcano, an enormous volcano. I think it's something like six hundred kilometers across and if that fucker blows like that is a rap for North America, that's a wrap
and it blows every six to eight hundred thousand years and the last my blue was six hundred thousand years ago within the network blowjob in histories within the next two thousand years. It's likely if the history repeats itself again that we get some sort of unbelievably violent event that comes out Yellowstone. That literally brings humanity to its knees. So all of our problems, with over Papa location of destroying the environment, crime and war and corruption. They will seem like nothing because there will be no fucking son getting in there will be nuclear winter plants die this ain't, even the fan, oh snap, in half the people disappear. This is like these are the end times the sky. It's one hundred percent possible, that something like that? If, especially, if there's more than one of them went off like say, yellow, It goes off and then say one goes off somewhere else in the world. I think. Is there, like seven or eight super volcanoes, there's there's
seven or eight of 'em I wanted to run off at once. It could split the earth. I think we just cover the earth with ash that the problem is the ash, the ejections and all that stuff just blocks out the sun, and it lingers for years three of or in the western part of the United States, and what are they where, where we are three dude, one of the other ones, Long Valley in Valley Grand? What is that never heard of those that's super close to us, where the is that one. We're sitting on it right now? We look it up. I We should be scared that shit and then after the heart attack. Now I don't I don't. I don't get a scared of that somewhere. Do you feel do front now that you've had a heart attack. Do you feel like you're, a different person? Do you have a second lease on life as it? Where is, but not in the way, like you see in movies, where you like, can you feel isn't mammoth mammoth, the super volcano valley- Caldara oh shut, the fuck up, if adjacent to mammoth mountain, so we could blow mammoth could blow.
So they wouldn't even rather be that close to ground zero. Like 'cause, you don't want to live in the ash. He wanted to be in Glendale. So just it just rubs, it just kills everybody anywhere near where I think you don't want to be like one million miles away and watch it from the distance and know that in a month are going to be starving to death, it's coming soon, yeah you're, almost better off and having happening right underneath you- and just Can you into the lava? Did you ever have a near death experience no, not really. No, it's not like it is in the movies where you suddenly like now. I see everything fucking more clearly it's certainly an organizing in organizer like where you're like you know. I guess that shit just doesn't really matter so much anymore and periodic you sit there and go like oh fuck. I almost died, so it puts things in a different perspective. So a lot of folks online going like I can
wait to see what he makes next MAX is going to be so profound and that's not true. Next thing I'm going to make his Jane Silent, Bob Reboot there's nothing profound about it and stuff, but I figured I figured I started thinking about that? Why because, like I've, just always at least for the last twenty years, twenty five of my career. Just conducted myself in a way like a fucking bucket list life to do the things I want to do exactly that's why I hate you see in the United encourage, so that doesn't take courage that self centered no self centered courage is like I don't know how this is going to work out, but, like you know it it it, and also courage comes in place. It's not about you. I think for me. I just want to do shit. That seems interesting, like seems fun, to have the confidence to pursue that listened. I don't know about conflict teach how to use a bow and arrow and you'd figure. It out eventually rise. Just like you're, losing all this weight and readjusting your life and check it all went down they'd be like eat him. First,
and then I'd be so insulted. 'cause, I'm like you're just going to shit me out, I'm good for a podcast or two: please don't so tomorrow I have Robert shock on the podcast, this geologist from Boston University and is one of many people. That's now pushing this very controversial theory that the sphinx- and many of the other structures in Egypt are far older than people think they are not just like a couple one thousand years ago, but maybe even ten thousand years ago, maybe even more and he bases non water erosion marks in the Temple of the Sphinx like where the sphinx was carved out in this function. Closure there's all these deep fissures they thought was sand and gravel and wind, but he as you know, studied he's a geologist, so he studied erosion. His whole life- and he looked at it and he's like, this is water erosion from thousands of years of rainfall and it goes into in great detail. The last time there was great rainfall in Nile Valley was nine thousand years ago, which is many one thousand years before they think the pyramids were constructed. So
It's one of those things like they didn't even know of a civilization from nine thousand years ago. There was people of cutting and moving stone like this, like this rewrites history, history super reluctant, but the idea that all these people have these people that are talking about these ancient civilizations is that humanity who rose to a very high level and build some incredible structures and then something like that: soup, volcano or an asteroidal impact or an ice age. Some gigantic catastrophic event wiped out a shit load of fucking people, and then people were forced to rebuild and sort of turn. So, if you're, looking at some of the construction of the pyramids, like the great pyramid of Giza, I'm pretty sure they've dated that to two thousand five hundred BC. So the people that made this thing isn't even some of the old other structures they might have been from longer ago in history. In relationship to the construction of the sphinx, then we are to the can function of the great pyramid like we might have what we were talking about. If the great pyramid was
five thousand years old right. Yes, this is right. Now, your day, yeah, I have to it's entirely possible. If the great hearing of Jesus Woods, I think it's somewhere around five thousand years old. If that was far five thousand years old, the sphinx might be four thousand or more years older than that there might be structure another ten thousand five hundred even thirty thousand years old is some people when they go deep, like a guy named John Anthony, W was deep speculation based on the way the Sphinx lines up with constellations in the constellation LEO it does it, like. Tenth one thousand five hundred BC, but also it does it or ten thousand five hundred years ago, but it also does it at like three thousand and thirty thousand years ago or somewhere in that range like really long ago, which people are going to get the fuck outta. Here, that's just not possible and his his take was like we don't know they were just talking about rocks. We don't know how these rocks got into this shape. This is just we can there's no recorded snow recorded
history or where they used to have some, but you know they've got hieroglyphs. I've got a few things, but they used to have the library of Valor supposedly had like like incredibly developed society, the Mayans and the MAX Master, they built some incredible structures and they like really into constellations as well. They lined up a lot of their structures with the constellations. They knew a lot about the summer solstice and they but really complicated calendar. There was like a thirteen lunar cycle calendar. You know they, like the thing The mind calendar was supposed to end December 21st, two thousand couple years ago: yeah dude. I thought it was over. I'm telling everybody. We got a couple more years pro with your life, I would read just seem to know what they were doing. Wait a second go back. So if that turns out, be the case. Humanity has experienced these great great, like higher, achievements and construction methods to put together these enormous structures, and then cataclysm people die off,
get down to a small number and then they rebuild, and then they, do these over the you know these these dips and or or ups and downs over course of thousands and thousands of years, which we got to put into perspective this country Free is only two hundred and fifty years old is nothing. So if you went back discovered, would go full crazy. Let's go back five hundred years go back five hundred years. Which is nothing in terms of the history of the planet and nothing in terms of even the history of human beings relatively. But five one hundred years, there is nothing here. Native Americans there's no straw. There's a few Europeans that have visited there's a few's that uh people have come over and boats, but there's no, buildings in terms of like there's, no New York City, there's no Chicago five hundred you know, there's nothing, there's none, this ghost up outside a city, look around two hundred or three hundred and sixty and look around and realize how Impr
available at all is go one thousand years before that same thing, one thousand years before that this is empty. This is empty for thousands and thousands of years. Now, two hundred and fifty years later, it's crazy it stacked up with build in construction methods that we were never capable of two hundred years go three hundred years ago, five hundred years ago, we couldn't build these things. We couldn't make airplane we didn't have the knowledge. We didn't understand it yet the ideas that people have gone through these great great heights many times, but they did it in different ways and that's why, like, when you look at the construction of the sphinx in the pier nobody bills. Anything like the pyramids today, two million three hundred thousand stones, some of them cut from a quarry that hundreds of miles away. They said. Take the fucking Broxson float him down on boats and fit him into places. It's crazy to the new college. They must have had the wisdom to understand of construction methods of if you're off, just a little bit with each rock. It's not going to meet up at the top of this perfect, pier
which shape is a marvel of mathematics and engineering and construction and by everyone's estimate. It's five thousand something years old or in the range of four thousand and five years old somewhere around there insane and that only comes along and says it may be older than that might be able to nap. Well that not that they don't think the pyramid, I'm pretty sure, and then maybe this is controversial, well, but I think it's based on the biological material that they can pull out from in between the cracks and the stones died while stuff. You know like anything, physical or anything, biological, rather like wood or or plant material that might have went into the building yeah. That's how they'd carbon date, something apparently they need carbon. So it's really tough to carbon date, like a stone because you don't know what you're dating. Are you dating the the way the age the stone was cut or the? stone was created like what the fuck is that
If you had a giant piece of limestone? What are you dating? Are you dating the actual origin of the limestone it might be? teen years old, I don't know how limestone is like, isn't it Limestone is seashells that have been great, sound down and smashed by gravity and layers and layers of earth until they form into a stone, see if I made that up might have. I'm I sounded awfully metal there's some shit like that for sure, like I know, travertine is that travertine is like old sea shells have been like so compressed down to the bottom of the ocean forever until the form like this hard layer. Pretty sure this trip to the might be. That might also be bill, says you're well, read Nope correct my wrong. Most limestone deposits are made from the shells of Microsoft. Scopic see organisms, coral reefs, arab
for example, of organic sedimentary rocks made by creatures that are still living, okay, so yeah. It is so limestone deposits, it's made by the shells of microscope pixie organisms, so these shells they compare this down. They make this stone they built they built fuck, giant buildings out of this shit, so just think of the age of that stone like how. How old was that shit and so everything that we think we know could literally backed by a couple, one thousand yeah, but even that it's like. I think it's weird that holding on to these numbers instead, like saying? Well, we have some tap. Yes that show that pretty sure that this was created around then, but that you might be right, that might be older people like really resist what he sang there really resisted because you'd. To go back and a lot of people that got degrees in Egyptology, like you have to rewrite what we know, because once they once I decide
This is the age when this was made and taught most is. The third is responsible for this, and this guy was responsible for that. What's the right that and and sell the books super hard to take the outback and suddenly be like wow super hard to admit they don't really know and so this guys and this isn't uh. Something like hey. Pluto is not a planet anymore, because we were off by its size or whatever. This is like. We had literally no idea that people existed that far back when we knew people existed, but we didn't know they were capable building things like that, but I'm saying like why is that even surprising if people four thousand fucking years ago could build something as crazy as the great pyramid?
Thank you. Why would I be shocked that someone four thousand years before that could build the sphinx more four thousand years before that can build some mother Temple? I mean it's also just a number. That's really like ridiculous to get your head around what you're liable to wait, four thousand from now backwards, and then four thousand from that point like forget it yeah and then to think that humanity was probably restart at least as a certain extent somewhere on the end of the ice age like the the humanity recovered and start flourishing again. So who knows you know how what what what number of people we dip down to fifteen thousand plus years ago, if they were, if they built the spanks further back than we thought they good did they have language skills they must offer? He can't build something like that. Without being like hey put a nose on it, I think they're pretty two of languages? Forty thousand years old, see if that's true in the form that we would describe as language. You know like
a b? Well, you know, I don't know what languages two hundred thousand. What okay psychology today, though, definitely probably smarter than me. So ok, so two hundred thousand years ago, moreover, around fifty thousand years ago, for appeared referred to by archaeologists of the upper Paleolithic and uh Precedented cultural explosion began to manifest itself. Human communities. Maybe that's what I remember so fifty thousand years ago, the number that's in my head, so language They had a long time, they didn't start, they don't think at least they started writing until somewhere around ten thousand years ago, but they don't even know, if that's the case, but the the I think, the
oldest known writing that we know of today. I think, is that stuff that comes out of Iraq CUNY a form. I think it's called it's a from the agency Marian's in there were the oldest civilization that were like modern. I mean not modern but advance civilization that we're currently aware of and they kept records yeah they rode in with like old school. Do you ever do any carpentry hello? No, when I was a kid in Boston, I were I've done a lot of houses, demolition stuff in carpentry stuff, and you would go in these old old houses and they had these weird nails. 'cause the nails were all hand made back. Then there weren't a nail, like you think, of nail like a table top with a pole underneath it it's not with the nails were sales were like this weird kind of like almost rectangle triangle thing, and that was exactly what cuneiform looks like it has a like a very specific pull up. Some sumerian Sumerian cuneiform. So is a series of lines, and it's really
got to be insanely hard to decipher like what what they were writing and what they meant by all this. But this is their language that shit that you're looking at right there that right there. So it's like seems like an intermediate between hieroglyphics and an alphabet. Yeah, I mean I don't know, I'm just too so I don't sit around and when you look at it, yeah like it's still a little well, that's not that's like leaning more toward letter. What is that that's like if you saw that on a spaceship you'd be like? Oh, the alien writing, it's not even that alien, but does not look. If you saw that on spaceship, that looks like something from like hangar. Eighteen yeah right, if that was on the side would be Little STAR gate e, but yeah. It looks very stargate to me like look at that dude That is like some sort of like if you had a computer print out member those old school print outs that would run through computers with little holes punched in them. That is, would look kind of like that. The
that's the oldest language! I think that shit, six thousand years old, Babylonia have been able to decipher an alphabet or be like forty eight letters in their alphabet. Yeah. I don't know what they found, but they found a lot of cool shit. They have a lot of cool shit from this. Marians. Remember much kid like you know, I went to Catholic Schools a kid and the big a story when we were younger was we got like new nuns sisters like at a certain point like when I started catholic School, our lady of perpetual help. They had old school nuns that you know would rap your fucking, knuckles and shit like parents would talk about And then also made these new cyst, come in sisters of the franciscan sisters of the infant this and they were more like about education, almost like a Jesuit priest, so that you know they definitely had their vows and whatnot, but they were more progressive in
you're thinking then like the previous generation that had come prior to them. So sister Teresa is like Garth Grade teacher captured imaginations with the dead sea scrolls story about how there was a bible that we all worked off of and then thanks to some kid who threw a rock in a cave. They found all these jars and inside of the jars perfectly preserved, where all these writings on parts, these drawings, yes, and so that's where we started getting a clear picture of the Bible, that's where they found bibles or gospels that aren't included in our Bible, then it was like this is a minute before raiders of the lost Ark came out. So then, when that movie came out, you will like it's all. It's all connected yeah, the scroll, a fascinating man. You know they had to use dna testing to make sure or that they were getting the pieces of this parchment from the
animal skin so like say, if you had these pieces, they they had so many. They studied him for years and they for to decipher them. They would have to lay them out on tables. You ever see what they look like like laid out on tables, and so one of the ways that they had to determine where pieces would go. This is a incredibly painstaking process. They had to take small bits of organic material because it's animal skins and then they would run it through a dna test to go this is the same animal. This animal is where you know all these pieces go on here. This is likely for the same piece of skin. How amazing dude crazy and I'm I think it's the only version the Bible that was written in aramaic gas well done fox you're over at no noise but alright about drugs see. This is all about Joe
on Marco Allegro. We talked about yeah that guy. That's how I found out about yeah the dead sea scrolls in the christian Math and the sacred mushroom the crosses to books on that, but he was a he's, got a study that the dead sea scrolls at what point just we just saw an image of the dead, sees Parchments Prada point. Do I give up instantly? You know what I'm saying like we're somebody's like good luck, you might have to demand that go by yeah. I do like you know if you had the funding I'm down to tell me I gotta jet. I got a spot at the store. I got office the store not for me man I mean, but it is for somebody and I'm grateful. I'm grateful that guys like that, like Robert Schoch who's, taking these trips to Egypt, to study this and really put his neck out there, but releasing this very controversial theory, I'm glad there's all these people out there that are questioning these things and looking into these things, and that someone has the energy to study the dead sea scrolls and to go out and apparently there's some wacky ass, fucking crazy stories in there, like they've, tried to compare.
Where are the stories for the way more extreme way way. Weirder to the point, people are only that we should use these stories. Is that involve the same characters? I don't know you know I like you is it I don't know much about allergy heroes. I don't think so. What is it like? Maybe we find because that's a story had a problem, isn't chunk missing yeah I was twelve and the next time they pick him up. He's thirty one yeah. I think that's probably something that can't be just Google's. I think it where was Jesus problem, to read a book on like what they learned out of the dead sea scrolls, but I remember there was some sort of a documentary on all of the hidden truths of the dead sea scrolls and why these Christians were, trying to omit it from. You know, and not you know, put it into the final version of the Bible. You know it's. It's some master gospels. They pull out from from there the, for people that it was a faith, I guess, or a section of faith, that they were great record keepers
but they were also not necessarily like an. It was the cry stem cell for the mighty son of God, the you know they were a bit more practical and they're telling of the tale. Yeah didn't religion it up. Quite so much if you had it. If you could go back back to a time and observe life like being like a giant bulletproof hamster wheel, and observe life, would you go the dinosaur era and see live? T Rex is running around and predators and crazy thick at me fear and heavy vegetation of pre sixty five million years ago, or would you go and watch people from like five thousand? years ago. Did I get one shot at this one shot either you notice that dinosaurs, because I'm like I've, seen Jurassic Park. And the real dinosaurs probably aren't going to be nearly as impressive as drastic park near you that
being seen Jurassic Park. You saw that being said. Go I go to the Christ era because it might solve a lot of problems. If I can come back and be like, he was real as it turns out. He was the son of God like here. It is, let's listen to the clerk's guy time travel. I think you know everything you got fooled by Magician Bro who's, the guy who literally who's who's, telling us that the sphinx is older than it is somebody's got put their neck out there. Some yes man, I'll, be willing to be the guy. To do John Anthony Wes was the guy he's dead. Now just died recently. What yeah Joe how many w this guy, who started this Robert shock, that some target he's another one of 'em he's the geologist John Anthony W was the guy who is like making all these dvd's about. It he's really serious egyptologist that just passed away yeah he's? The one is really trying to put these old answer.
His views on the role of the fear that like ice well, may be older than you. He just had a x he's got this crazy dvd series called magical Egypt. It's phenomenal. I think it's got a two: two one and two. I really only watched one, but it's so good man. I mean it's like a sick dvd Series, all on the mysteries of Egypt to happen. We just got some me fuck, you SIRI. Look. It just starts recording me man there is your farm just come to life in store yeah. She just started the government man the and I'm talking to Rosanne. Where are we talking about? What was I just talking about magic magical, Egypt, tv series, so this guy is the one who got me like into was my head around the concept of the collapse and then a thousand years later, rebuilds again, and then do you think about what the United State
was like five or ten years ago, was non existent and now look what it is now and that these great moments of change happen periodically in human history, especially in places where there's a lot of commerce and there's a lot of food. Like you know the rich vast wilderness- and you know the the the the the door, though the reverse, filled with fish and places where people could get enough food and they would build these cities and then they would start inventing shit and innovating, and if one hundred years later, they would be better two hundred years later, the better than that. One hundred years later they have crazy structures and then building things, and apparently this is what like in the Nile Valley when they were done with the when they were constructing? All these things was a stop bounty of food in and somebody just shook it like an etch, a sketch for the climate change. That's the real theory really yeah, because this is what
you're saying about the Nile Valley is that before nine thousand years ago is or tropical rainforest, and now it's all you know it's all sand in the desert, but before that it was like fucking trees and the climate change is whether we fuck with it and make it change faster or not. It's not stable. It's constantly going up and down you know, and so this is probably also partially responsible for what happened to those people But those people had taken shipped to a nother level. Man more. I need to go. There have been because I've only been watching dvds and I'm scared to go in Egypt because it's sometimes it's a little unstable right. But man what it must be like to see these four thousand fucking year old, gigantic stone structures that were cut and moved by. Who knows how many people and who knows how the fuck they did it. They just have theories, there's just guesses, but they don't know,
there's no hieroglyphic wall. That's like here's, the real story, not really I mean the problem was they think that a lot of the information was in the library of Alexandria is written down that was burned when you know they were conquered so because they don't really know, don't really know how they made him. There's a lot of good gases, what a good theories but fuck you're talking about millions of stones and their huge like. How long did this take? They say if you cut it place. Ten of those massive stones a day, it would take you six hundred and sixty four years to make the great pyramid. Anne were all we know, that's how long it took just what wait a minute and say that again Ten of those massive stones a day, it would take you six hundred and sixty four years to build all the great pyramid to build just the great pyramid of Giza. Just that just that one just that one so whoever commissioned it certainly wasn't around to see it finished one hundred percent in less they had some wizard magic shit that we're not aware of, and they did it way quicker than we think they did
Well, who knows how long they it took them to build? We don't really know you might have one thousand years. You know who knows: where do you stand on faith or what what happens when I'm? In your estimation, we die what happens? I really don't know, and I think in that regard I'm right there with everybody. I think you can have your ideas. I think those ideas can strengthen your resolve in this life and they can even help you, and this is something I had, except as I got older, more the same thing like okay. Why don't have this reaction? like there's certain people that are like these ardent atheist, like God, is dead, there's no God shut the up and MIKE okay. How do you know you don't know so uh, even though logic would point, I mean if you really pay to ten into the way human beings tell stories. You would have to say well, a lot of these religious stories are probably fabricated, or maybe there was an initial message. Image, or maybe there was some wisdom that these people initially stuff pull up on. They wanted to document it, but whether or not all this came
from God? You know the Cain and Abel Shit and trying to trick a brother in to kill another brother like oh, I almost got you you're going to do it for me, you're my boy you're, going to kill your brother. Thanks. Man- or this is so many of those stories there was a little more human than more God like yeah, but does that mean is no God no, of course it doesn't it doesn't this. You know is too bizarre for you to leave anything off the table, any possibilities of what what created it. It sustains it other than cyantific. You know you get down to like the most reductionist perspective of it just a series of quarks and gluons and Adam, and then you know an energy and may it is all that. Maybe it is just that, but maybe that in itself is God, maybe God is not a material thing, but it's a creating force of the entire universe itself, and it also has good in its heart, like maybe reason why we love like hugs and good
member station and and and you know, a q poppy and all these are things we like love and we like happiness, because all these things are powerful forces in the universe and all these things represent the greater we bill of the creator of whatever it is. That makes this universe so spectacular, whatever the fuck that is, I don't know what it is But anybody who says they know what it is- is lying you're lying you're trying to trick people so that you have the ultimate truth and they don't and that's how we control people and that's fine up until around. Now it's fine when there was no internet, it's fine with books were scarce. It's fine! When we had to keep order. It's fine, It's fine, but it's not fine anymore, because we know too much now so it doesn't mean that. There's, no God, but it means you definitely this guy, that wants the jet who's that it's televangelist. That wants fifty million dollars to buy his own private jet for sure that guys, full of shit right, see
so there's like things that we can learn he's found a hospital and it's not even original hustle. It's like. I know what happens after this. Give me your money. God wants me to be wealthy and that's what he saying saying ever meet somebody in a donkey experienced the afterlife. Yet I've met people that have had near death experiences that have had crazy, trippy, almost psychedelic experiences, and my belief is that a lot of that can be attributed to the pickles, that your brain is capable of producing on a regular basis. Does why you're sleeping it does why you're into periods of extreme stress- and you know, and that all of these, different chemicals, most like We are released in the brain during these overwhelming periods of anxiety and fear and terror. An injury when your body is thinking of hay, and this might be it. You know- and I think that's probably what a lot of these near death experiences are. Is that people experience what you would call an endogenous, psychedelic experience that your brain is
leasing, these potent chemicals that it has it absolutely has inside of it. Your brain has a ton of different. You know do things like dimethyltryptamine and different. Psychedelic chemicals is capable of producing, as well as like melatonin dopamine serotonin adrenaline cortisol, this fuckin storm of shit, going on in your brain and in a moment, like your dad a moment like exactly hawk jacks at all, probably pops it through your fucking neurons and everything is firing and you're, seeing things that aren't there and you're talking to dead relatives you're imagining the pearly gates in your imagination is on ten and you just seeing everything. That's the reduction IST perspective, the hopeful optimal, Dick spiritual woo perspective is this is a chemical gateway and you're, seeing through the door of the other side and then when they decide it's not your time yet you're sucked back to where you lie
and then you're allowed to resume this life 'cause. You have more work to do and that's the perspective that a lot of people feel when they come out of those experiences right. They feel like. I have more work to I can't stop now years ago, guys, like ten years ago that even fifteen years ago, at this point, had a heart attack. Our heart episode. Rather, my dad died of a heart attack, but my mom's on the table and they were put in a stent into her heart into her artery and she was sitting there chit chat and while they were doing the surgery, I guess she was on a local more so than anything else and issues joke around the doctor. She's, like you're gonna hurry up talks are going to pick up my mom for the and then went out well, and so she died for a minute and a half clinically dead. They kept try to restart the art. So I was like what what just what happened. What was it
she said I was floating and was like floating up. She goes no full. Bring on my back. Ok! Well, you are on your back in the hospital. Do you think that's what it was she was like? I don't know, but this is is what I remember every. Iota of responsibility I ever felt in my life was gone. She's, like I felt free, like I felt instantly lighter, and just as I was heading in a direction, that's when, like they pull their back. So she's been dead for like a minute, half hearted stuff so right in this best of all possible worlds? For you know, sixty plus years now you Seen a glimpse of the other side which is, and my mom said, the other side, and I said what what
there for like a minute, and she said I was completely free like That was it I didn't. I didn't know this one. I don't have to care for this one. I don't have to make sure this is take care of. I have to feed the cat. She was like it was bliss she's like and if that's what happens then? I look forward to that again. So when I just have mush at three months ago and the doctor was like, you got twenty percent chance eleven going through all the fucking shit in my head about like alright. Well, this is it your fucking. You spend your life with your head up your ass. You know fucking. To figure out who you are deadly your head and heart. What is your this is it. This is the big moment like what are your thoughts going through and now you know such a chicken shit and live. I assume that I'd be like the guy. It was like a fucking suck your dick to stay in this life, so this life- and I don't know what happens afterwards and stuff. So I thought I'd be begging for help from
God or something like that. But I was like I'm a dog, I'm sure Jesus would be let go to Hell. You buddy Christ, my so, instead of doing the g, the religious thing I started thinking about just the journey itself, I was like well, the journey is ending. What are your thoughts just like when the debt held up the phone there like do you wanna talk to your wife, and I was like I no no, of course I did I didn't want to 'cause, I was like I know in my heart of hearts. Violence. If I speak to my wife right now, I'm going to be in that twenty percent I'm going to die, I'm gonna be in the eighty percent, I'm going to fucking drop dead ' 'cause, that's the intensity of it, not even like. Oh, my god, it just the way they were so like do you want your wife is on the phone? Do you want to speak to her right now, it's very leading an you know. Their professionals in these cats deal
life and death every day, and this is my first experience with it. So what I got out of it was you probably going to die and it's still, I was in the state of like I didn't realize. I was- was a heart attack, and so I remember looking at the phone and being like, if I not sure. If I talk to Jennifer, that's going to be I'm not going to leave this room so's I'm going to play the odds. If I don't talk to Jennifer, maybe some part of me that site look. I like talking to Jennifer we've been together talking twenty years. I better enjoy talking to Jennifer. Maybe if I put this phone call off, you know they don't get to talk to Jennifer. And it's all fucking done. So I said to the dude I was like you know what tell her I'll call her back and the guy go series. I was like yeah I was like what she said because she was fucking pissed dude and I was like wow
I'm dealing with my own shit right now, so I was laying there on the table and I was going through my life and I was more grateful anything else. I wasn't scared anymore. That was the thing as a love thing that I'd love to communicate spent my whole life, terrified of fucking dying, when I was, is closest to it, as I ever knew I was, and for all I know I was closer someplace but, like I was cognizant and told by a professional, this is fucking risky. I was just kind of I was grateful more than anything else. I was like what a fucking journey like you, one thousand and forty seven, it seems short but fucking, like you gotta admit we did more than fucking. Most people get to do, and maybe that's. Why happened at an early age because you weren't going to get the rest of this time and shit like that, but, like I I wasn't mad. I wasn't like fucking why this is unfair, like there's a issue
who is Sandman, which I absolutely love. Neil Gayman's comic book Series back in the day in like after the first story arc, he we meet his sister, the main characters, dream Morpheus. The character of dream is part of the endless and he's got us. The other siblings delirium desire, one of the siblings is death and they represent death in the comic book. You know you're used to say in the fucking sky than the fucking grim reaper and she's a little emo girl, goth girl, wearing a knock around her neck and shit like that is written in the 90s, and they don't tell you right away that she's death. As you read in the issue, you're, like oh shit, I think she's meant to be death, she's, faring soul. Over to the other side, you see a baby pass and she's holding the baby and then there's the rain is like that. I hear the sound of her wings and that's taking this soul over to the next place, as she sitting around talking to her brother and
so she she eventually gets into a room with his older guy. Like who are you and you know she's like I'm here for you, you know who I am and he's like. That's it he's like, oh, my god. I did all these things. I work my fingers to the bone and what did I get this? Is that what it You get, and she says you like a line that when I read it when I was eighteen, it was powerful. But when I was laying on the fucking table it was really going to my head and made it all easier, maybe kind of at piece of the idea of dying there's this line. She says to the guy, she goes you get. You got what everybody gets you got a lifetime and as I was laying there, I was like. Oh my god, I got a lifetime like that. That's what it was ' is nothing more, nothing fucking lesson. I did some shit net and now it's going to stop, and People go on without you and that's not terrible. Like I thought, I'd be desperate to live. Instead I had that. Weird, like I understood what my mother said for the first time
'cause I was laying there. I was like. Oh my god, like I made it to the end like this. Is it this is the finish line, and it had been something that I was terrified of ever getting too. But then, when really kind of face with that, I was like. Oh, like I'm done, like not scared that I'm done, I'm actually kind of relieved. Then I'm done and, like you know, fucking like I didn't get killed, and I wasn't home invaded a shark didn't eat me all the things like I've been terrified of my entire life, like I don't have to think about anymore. I made it to the end and it it's kind of okay, so So it's weird my whole life, I thought, like you know: I'd, be scared to death and most people, we all are we're all terrified of fucking dykes. We don't know, but that's close came in and I wasn't scared. Like suddenly. The fear just went away and it seemed logical like, of course it's over. Like things end an didn't want to die. I wasn't ever death wish, but I was like if it's done it's it's kind of it's done.
Count your blessings and be happy and don't be a bitch like don't. If, if the can ferry man shows up tonight, don't fuck it hold now, don't be the last asshole at the party. Go no like just fucking pay to fair, think it on a boat and go we'll see what's next and stuff and and ultimately, Ladenheim did a good job and I fucking wound up living and stuff, so know this much. I got to read a bunch of shit like after I nearly died. It was all nice people wrote very nice things about me and shit, and I expected you know them. Creature of the internet some people be like I wish I had fucking died, fuck him to death and shit. I wish you'd stay silent, but generally it was like very nice things. People were kind of positive and stuff. So I was like fuck man like you know, I again I didn't want to die but like if I had like that would have been ok, now, I'm back out it. You know I'm saying like now, so it ends like I've got a you know
and it's kinda easy as long as they don't wake up with a fucking, dead girl or a live boy. I don't think like they'll fucking broke me over the coals when I die in the future and shit like that, but it felt weird to be so close to the completion, an having something that normally terrified you suddenly be like Oh, it's, okay like and I don't see if you walked put a gun in my face, I'm sure I'd feel threatened. But, like I kind of law, my fear of death, I'm not like death defying. I will go out and do anything differently, but that that dark cloud that come. It kills any good time. The moment you start thinking about, like the fear and anxiety, die one to like, it's gone and I will send him a gamma to die one day and it's going to be awesome not for the reasons that you think I'm saying it's going to be all supposed to be awesome, because I finish like it's nice to finish things. We know how good it feels in life to complete something and it's the biggest fucking thing in life. You'll ever complete is your journey, so I didn't walk away gone like
how to do more. Like I got a fucking live life to the fullest. I just got to keep doing what I've been doing like in life. The way I enjoy it trying to do things, sometimes they work. Sometimes I fail and shit sometime people are on your side. Sometimes people are you fucking blow and just do that. I have good conversations in the process meet interesting people here, new points of view and shit like that, it's nothing to be afraid of like I don't want to get eaten by cat. Don't get me wrong like I guarantee you, I would not be Phillip. Topical as a fucking. Big cat was crushing my I I find prayer quick, but Death is no longer something I'm I looking for it and I'm certainly won't put myself in harm's way, but it done we occupy me anymore. I've been there and it's not,
the thing that I was led to believe it was like it's not the ultimate fear come true. It's now the grim, reaper, there's a sense, at least in my case and again I don't have a painful heart attack. I'm sure people have heart attacks with they feel like they're bodies being ripped and the cleaved in TWAIN. But if it wasn't it wasn't that wasn't scary, it was okay, Well, listen! Man! I'm glad you lived 'cause. I love you and you're one of my face. Love! You too! I couldn't. We don't talk very often, but when we do, I always love and after the heart attack I couldn't wait. We started talking to be like bro you gotta commit. Definitely I didn't want to ask quick the protocol gyros, but so morbid, listen man, you might not make it. He think you get in here, yeah but now I is the is low happy to be here and stuff as all as as we all are happy to be above ground spell and below are happy to hear your perspective to really running man. So long as your seeker as well anything it mean
that's a lot of people that are listening to because that's what everyone is scared of right up close to one scared, the ride. But you know that's what we think were trained to think that way. Every fucking movie every book you read every song is about like how it will suck when it's over and that fear can keep you from enjoying it while you're living and try and cool things and stuff like that- and I don't mean like put yourself in harm's way, like let's shoot a movie with real lions, that's been done, don't try to watch the fucking video, but the things we like I'd really like to try it like a fucking, won't work or others may be time later. That's one thing did walk away from it like time. You're like key for every God. Damn sack every God damn second, so we use it wisely and think, and I think if you could just think that way like today is a borrowed debt. You know, you'll have sometimes sometimes have to trick yourself into like find more enthusiasm used to trick yourself to be pumped up about stuff, but if you can,
really do that an exercise those patterns in your brain and get them normal. There's there's people that have trick themselves. To enjoying all sorts of things that they know we're good for them. They just fire up those fucking chemicals and today we're going to just go out there and attack. Back day because this a gift this is this, isn't supposed to be here we got one. I think that all the time now honestly, that's like an underlying goes under almost every thought. I have, and it doesn't happen constantly, but it literally happens about ten times a week. You'll be doing some Then we had in somewhere you'll be eating something fucking, whatever the fuck fucking having a conversation and then you'll be like this isn't supposed to be happening right now, texting based on the odds I was supposed die back on the fucking table, so suddenly you're like I'm playing on House Money House money. You know what I'm saying have it live a house money life kids, live just money, life. Kids. I should be a fucking t shirt. Thank you, Kevin Excellent! Really,
Hey brother, appreciate you thank everybody for the podcast and thank you Thank you to the cash app down the cash app in the app store or Google play it's for free when you download the cash app. To the reward code. Joe Rogan, you receive five dollars and the cash apple send five dollars to our friend Justin Wren's fight for the forgotten charity thing. You also to dollar shave club dot com. It's a great play, ladies and gentlemen, to get their bundle, bundle up a bunch of dollar shave, club, dot, coms, awesome products for just five: box. You can get their daily essential! Starter kit comes with body cleanser, one wipe charlies their amazing buff. Buff. Butt wipes their world famous shave butter in their best razor at the six blade executive. You keep the blades coming for just
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Transcript generated on 2019-10-05.