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zip recruiter the smartest way to hire my next this is one of the funniest human beings on the planet earth. I have known him. For a long fucking time. He actually was a comic that I opened up for the second time I ever got paid to do. Stand up, he's been in Usta movies is been in Rodney Dangerfield's, HBO, comedy specials, he's a brilliant comedian and Boston Legend, and I just fucking love this how to death. Please give it up for the great and powerful oh he's with his brother. Oh Lenny Clarke is his name, but he's with his brother. White Clark, who is also a guy who runs giggles, comedy club and sagace, and he ran a bunch of comedy clubs. He was there for the hay day, he used to run the Dang Hall, which is like the legendary comedy club in the history, stand up in Boston. I fucking love these two guys to death, so please give it up for Lenny Clarke and his brother MIKE Clark

the Joe Rogan experience, but can he brother MIKE Mike Clark, the second man to ever, give me paid work ever in my entire professional career, open enough for Lenny Jay's in Pittsfield yeah right yeah? right, yeah yeah. I remember that warm the fo gig, I don't even know if norms around anymore, but I remember that gig like it was yesterday like I paid my rent many times many times, and you did too and for you paid my roommate I work from MIKE one of the crazies gigs I ever did It was a one and done you never did it again. It was a restaurant and I was in the seating area in the microphone for the people with they announced their table

tide to the PA system, so you'd be in the middle of this punchline he'd be like so I said to the Guy Clark Party to Party two Clark: your tables ready, like, oh, no, that wasn't the mexican place down the cape. Now wasn't mexican place. It was a seafood place. Yeah I had a lot of one night is back in the day when that was the beautiful thing about being. A comic in Boston. Is that if you lived in Boston go anywhere within like an hour two hours outside the city and work. Basically, every weekend it was Tuesday through Sunday July yeah yeah. We were working, seven nights a week at one point, there's so much you know, and ash yeah cash cash cash, king. Well, it was amazing, but it was also terrible because a lot of people were very bad with the taxes and they always put. My mother told me: don't fool around with the taxes

the mob. You might have been the only guy I paid I paid, but you might have been the only guy. Everybody else got hamstring, not she got killed, Kenny got killed and then, when they got killed, it was like hundreds of thousands because it was years and years and that you know- and you gotta make that up like Fox yeah, there's no getting out There's no getting out you wind up, paying it for the rest of your life. It's like student loans or something you know. What are you doing out here? It's going on what can about to do that. This is a bit more. I was going to do Kimmel, but smells Smith got segment, single mother, I'd like to fuck, it was under Showtime shows that show you what's going to this year and I played Rosie O'Donnell's love interest and I love I love rush. It will ship break five years ago she never forgot it, and she looks great right to me. So we're going to do that, and then it didn't

they show got cancelled. So please, sexual impropriety is something that nothing to do with Maine. Really like I can't do that way. I don't know I went behind the scenes. Yeah yeah. I don't know what happened used to be. That was the norm. Yeah, you know now shows get cancer, and now we well, thank God enough cameras, cellphones one Oh god, I'd still be doing time. I think forever you get Maine down to to do the Navy Seals family foundation. Big fundraiser, we do every year said Cindy yeah, yeah yeah, that's not coronado good Party. Last rejections as Navy seal that we golf would want their we've been touched with ever since he's he said the real bad yeah corners that island right. Yes, I have been yeah it's it's I went down and my said daughter, of course it's alright. So I climbed the rock that was then. This is

log into logs. That was spinning logs now, with time now he broke my back that was in. It was out of step on them. Yeah yeah step run across their rolling it down wrong, as you run it across so yeah, it's not easy to answer. You have a mouthpiece, no 'cause. It seems like they think about where the only ones out there yeah let Coronado Island. I think that's where Dick Cheney lives. Or Donald Rumsfeld, one of them which warmonger type yeah, there's a lot of a lot of money out there. I was in Trump sales office at the Pentagon to just cross. Well, no you, my buddy who's with me was reading the stuff on his desk. 'cause he's a contractor. He can read upside down, you know- and so let's put this disk God Marine Webber realize Pretty much doing came up covered it up. I said what you see is not good, It's amazing that those guys are still alive

oh yeah, especially Cheney and he's got. Somebody else is heart inside phone yeah, yeah I mean, and he had the person killed for that hot just do it just do a bit about how we had an extra secret service agent. There was only like vegetables, real clean. How to jog everyday is like what the fuck. Why do I have to do all this stuff? It's good good. Everyone did real dick has a heart attack. They open that guy up like a fishing pole, is still beating heart out. He had a pump inside of his body at one point in time where he didn't have a heartbeat wow. Had this crazy pump. That would just circle the blood, but there was no don't don't don't don't so someone checked his heartbeat beat through think he's dead. What does no harm? so. We could fake that you could take that in a bad situation, monster moving wow I had. I had the opposite problem. I had

I've I was doing a show and they made it. Land is going to do a network show that major have a physical, physical out yourself. I went in, and the guy goes on my cuddy's. What Yes, you feel like FL greatest. Your heart is pretty two hundred and eighty three pizza minutes ago. He said that, like a professional it's like a dead man, you moron. So he said this is horrible, two and a three it's a minute. Yeah, like you like crazy people would go out, turn down. Yeah yeah yeah yeah, it's a lot, but they stay brush me to a hospital if I give you some money we gotta be done. If I don't have this job, I don't want to live. I need the job. You don't see yeah, so they rush me in in in the atrium. Tribulation and, and it was both sides, and I hold the record for being jump started. You know when the defibulator, Yeah, the mass general yeah. It's like a phone book. How many times is doing? over one hundred. They restarted you,

hundred time yet yeah. Well, you see the future original show diseases, Finally, they finally did the ablation where they go in and they they burn the pot, that's flapping and they found out. The other side was flapping too, so they was eight hours on the table at this great doc. My friend every you know, every last from house of pain, yeah, yeah yeah he's got a fake one, so he takes the microphone, puts it up to his chest. As goes click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, click, he's got like a fee valve and their titanium valve. It's really creepy wow puts the microphone returns, but I'm here, if you can hear through the might oh my god, my usual product product. It was crazy but I didn't know I was. I was asymptomatic. You know, and I said to the doctor, I said: what do you think is? Well you know you wait, probably has something that I said. Well, I did a lot of blowing guys should have to do a credible amounts of

as well as a small amount that Peru missing, that much Lego, that much or that whole crew mean sweetie and I talked about it when he did the show that whole crew that Nick Comedy Stop crew was a cocaine, fuckin' extravagant Yes, I was very fortunate that I did it didn't still haven't, never did coke all. It was all right. That's all John! I I don't. I went to Columbia, Shearer was may yeah yeah. I was going to lose your because all my God, why tours two days to school, because really we sent it off to America, Mister money. I got a shipment and I got out which a blow for two hundred dollars. You know I had a lot. I couldn't even finish it in a week. You know, but I've tried Amazon possibly what does it look like You know scarface thing, you know it's got bigger than that. That's like twenty eight grams in ounce of people looking, but an ounce of pot is like yeah like yeah with that much,

same thing with coke that were bigger same bag out of had it everywhere. I remembered accursed money. You have to decide whether it's a coca me I said: do you want to live for the road? I know what happened, but it was it was. It was amazing. I really enjoyed Colombia, but did you go there? Just for coke yeah? I went back recently. Couple years ago. I went to do a burn notice. They were filming a movie, ok and they asked me to come down and I went down there and I went I remember some of this, but I wasn't When did you stop doing it? Maybe two years ago, wow twenty three yeah wow yeah, that's a good amount of time. What had I was doing this movie and I've. I finished the guy had throw this guy through and I really like the guy in on, and I don't want to hurt him.

And I should not. I got up so I put him through the wall and took a door off the hinges and they said money. We don't I thought this is Whitey Bulger's place. I go, I'm done after today, someone's going to pay YT. So yeah. I got I finished and I bought a bag of blow and whiskey and packaged opened some peers in case you well. I said you want to get really happy. I said you don't scare me so will pick you up at six hundred am so. I went back to the hotel met my buddy, my childhood buddy Well, he said: let's see how many bars we can go to before they charged us for bulls. You know today weather yeah, so so we ended up at the tall ships down at Faneuil Hall- and the guy didn't know me so we paid we said well realized was we free went back and we don't open the door bags open, wiggle freaks out. He said said the guys come out we're going to we're going like a rave and he We thought a meeting in South Boston and just

You know, I thought it was a gag. I tried to blow with me and it's come out once in awhile. I just listen, listen! This is after a bender after why during appendicitis, I want to be, and I I thought it was a rave. I thought we would construct race might feel bad or no. He was my step by step. That's it today and he's a young kid an you know. I said: well, you know how did you get so? I simply did you ever this is a stick with the bags for the shotgun. Could everyone on the flooring that you can be my sponsor S, s thing Joe. We get sober together, yeah the same day: oh wow, yeah wow, twenty three years, yeah yeah. It said it was the the thing of about that whole Boston cruise it? It was all kind of tide to drugs and the comedy had that field to it, because the comedy was frantic You know that was a thing that yeah Bang, Bang Bang. There was a thing about the guys who came out of Boston like still to this day they had like the fastest, paste, the most conscious lies and the audio

is there were used to that. So they have any bullshit and it would tell you that they were to. If you were good there, you you suck that I'd get off and we would have we was there were times much a decision to be new material. Not anyone who doesn't do new material, the minute you do anything you've done before get off the stage. So Rodge snippy sitting at the back and so you've got that being paid to shot glass with shadow on the wall. Next it was and it made you come and the people that, like you, said the audiences that came in there would come every week. Yeah, so you have to go and they would not settle for any bullshit. You know that that blows. That's no good yeah there was a. There was a whole scene. There wasn't just a comics, it was like comedy carnosaurs. There was so many people that came to those clubs shows pull it up MIKE. Put shows that with legendary will the Ding HO on Wednesday night Lenny would put like thirty two acts on all Adeleine

we got to get the show won't shut up. I got a couple more guys will give a break to that have guys going until two in the morning and if we don't know like a license it to the cops CUP levy, you got you got to stop and I go have a drink. It moved for. Shapiro the first night he took over when crimmins left, grimaces leave it and what was of slight pieces job eight thousand five hundred and eighty six. So I thought it closed at eighty four. I could be I'm in the I don't know if we should hold before mine. I came in eighty eight, you don't you don't you don't you're right, probably probably around eighty four I took over Barry and socially system. Hey man, Parrish Lee from where you stay for me, I'll double your pay yeah, alright I'll stay at fifteen to thirty dollars right at the time. You know He says you run the club. I don't know man, I get a guy. He goes home 'cause my little buddy. Just got laid off and pull the what if he screws us

Beach cruisers at tell my mother will be fine. So when it comes in and the first thing he says to shirleys the food sucks closed, the backroom close, the restaurant we're going to make that a showroom too. So you open the front room, you go through the kitchen and do a show in the backroom. Then, come back, it wait till it and we started. We've done six shows tonight, but the first night he comes in, I was pretty low. Because you're not going out tonight, you're drunk, I go fuck you, man, yeah little brother. I just got your fucking job. Fuck you I do whatever I want blah blah blah, so he gets Gavin and he will come on man. Let's go into cool though dole lights were cool with your life which again because I'll be right back I go out and click the fricks locked me he was so high. He said you're not going on tonight. They lock me in the cooler, so I said I'll show them. I started talking drinking everything in there out there to get me out of there. I apologize ok you're right, but he turned it into.

I will be doing six shows at night three in the front three in the back He said that the guy lost in a gambling game play chinese domino's over Chinatown and he didn't pay his food tax an so. I guess a year and a half later they came locked it up, but well first they came and he was sent a kid out to a liquor store to buy books because they took all the books. So we have to buy booze for that night and then, after that date they came and they took the chairs. They took the tables who's in quite yet lost everything. It was Wednesday night Lanny Thursday night Dj. Has it Friday night Don Gavin Saturday night, cramming in Sweeney on Sunday night killer show and what people don't know is that Boston had a different way of doing it, so it was the Lenny Clarke show Lenny would host the show right when he would go on. You would do like what ten

ten minutes or something like that supposed to hit open with forty. You know why you know why I came up with that joke. That was my idea because yeah because it used to be you know, opening middle closure- and I was always a closed- I'm going, hey man if I host it, I can do liar, and smoke dope in between the guys- and I said well, if someone has a bad said, I could pick it up or I can you know, be the buffer while they get over that guy and it just. Well, it was a great way of doing it. Yeah it really was and then we would kind of close it too right, yeah, oh absolutely yeah! I mean you know they were different, different crowds to like gav like I was always working wednesdays and I'd be other clubs it, but I was, for gas shock is gathered, a great show and they didn't like me. I was like gas crowd did not go for me. They hated me, and I said what the for you know. I mean it was a Holden. I had to learn

adapt to different audiences crowd, Gabby is say. It was more uh oh. He was a smart couple. Yeah yeah he's a gene his fuckin' comedy was so sharp. He would have punch lines you never dot com and on top of punch lines you never saw you were recovering from the last launch line that you hit you with another one yeah. It was off the first time. I saw him he came on and I watched him and I said to map to show I like it, but those who is my first of many of lie. Yeah, because we're not off to a good start right. I like it was like a competitive field, was well competitive and one night I was doing a show with him at some that it came on stage behind me was coming behind me and Gabby jumped over this railing at risk

the guy off, I see them and I was pretty cool because I got you back in them. We drove home to his place and it was like three days ago. And we've been friends ever since. But it's funny because he said to me was let me I'm going to ask you a question to you is: if you could be the richest person or the most famous person would appear so without doubt the most famous he gets really is: ok, six weeks later Skaff I thought about it. You're right I'd rather be through purchased a frameshift bunch of bullshit I'm glad you came around see what I mean by spot is nuts. If you're, the most famous person just gonna, get stocked every law, yeah either be that do the nobody knows. Call us at. I have found a billion difference billion, not million at their friends yeah, and I I think it might be that you know that pet project you know, but I made it's unbelievable. I mean that to tell to live like

you're not show billions out of your machine that none of these guys are just like that more money than you could spend more than you could spend yeah. That's a weird life. Yeah hello everybody else is struggling, but no one else that don't yeah. I was summoned. People know you know, but these people are like anonymous and if more money, that you can jets very clever God. So yeah, that's that's what I would like that. That's the way to go, even if you were a comic you'd rather just do clubs just show up and do clubs and just do a set once you're on stage telling Joe see the laughter. They don't laugh if you're funny, he'll kill it doesn't matter if you're famous, you know I would like to. I would like to be I like doing there. It is now because it's a different crowd, you know I I still do a lot of custom. I work MIKE's club all the time, thank God for him, but I thank for me yeah? I think it is reopened. Some there's some people, you know how, when you work the club you get some drunk. All it takes is one person yeah because I see

go with the flow. I mean, I really don't know what I'm going to do. I'm just going to go and I try to keep it. You know what's happening in the news today and some yes, baby really omelette break the rhythm, and I want to stab him. You know, but well, it doesn't always happen, though. That's the thing it does happen, but it doesn't know you're right most of the time it's great but lent just can't block it out. You know it's.

Doing it. No one there locks out worse than Depaul. Oh oh he's the worst. You don't even have to say anything. You just have a look on your face that he doesn't like what you don't think this is funny, but do you wanted to whisper in a sawmill, I'm working with Nick with doing some comedy tour of Toronto or something maybe auto assumption at all in an I was looking at him. I was hosting I'm looking at him and he was smoking at the time and it was uh dark, dingy club and it looked like watching. Lenny Bruce. It was just like that, so I'm laughing. So I step outside the room, and this is when a pregnant woman goes. Oh, my god. Oh my god. I really enjoyed you, but he's going to make me have my baby yeah, but he is so fun he's a funny mother fucker and he he's been going crazy. Lately, 'cause, the Mueller report got released and they said there was no collusion between Trump and the Russian, so all of his

they're. All his instagram is just attacking liberals like. Why do you fucking care? Why do you care yeah yeah? You can't retire, you lying just like so crazy resign, so crazy put it gonna, be some people put a gun in their mouth is not how we got kicked off again in the first place: serious, oh yeah, yeah yeah! You just telling people to kill themselves. Yeah he's doing that now on Twitter, Fuckin' animal gloriously kills me. Every time I wrote brilliant. It always has been. He was a guy that made me think, like okay, you don't have to be like a little. Any guy to do stand up It's like he was back in the days playing football. This handsome grounded looking jacked and I was like you don't have to do? Is we find women who love them yeah and he would your shirt on and I'm even more than Nikki was pretty funny to stop. You know yeah. I had always him sit. You know he was having

good shows, and he just he was out of the clubs every night and He just put any was always angry from the beginning. From the beginning, I had him on news radio. He played my brother and you know those always had this attitude that everyone is trying to fuck him over and even then I got him this gig and it's almost like he made it happen like it was him. And Brian Cowen, an Epstein from Welcome back Kotter with playing my brothers and on the episode they beat the academy. We all get the funk out of each other. Bottles overhead Brian Count threw me through a window and before thing was cast. I told the producer. I said I got this comic he's hilarious. I go, he looks like he be my brother. Let's hire him, he was yeah perfect. He goes. Can you read so I can see the so it comes in a reads: anyways yeah he's great perfect, but the casting agent had different ideas. She had a

friend who she wanted. She ran it, so she she cast this other guy Unbeknown said either and he made a deal with the producer and the showrunner, and so they call Nick up and tell them that he didn't get the gig he's like what the fuck I didn't get them in Kingston I go now you got the giggles a fuckin'. Just told me. I don't have the funding gig so he's lying. So I make the phone call and find out what happened, and you know and she's like well already hired my friend ago, you weren't supposed to hire your friend. What are you doing right and she's like? Well? I just you know I know what to do. I already hired this guy. Go will tell him he's fired like this is real simple. Like the producer wants it, the network wants him, and so Nick came back and Nick got the part, and he couldn't believe it he's like a boy doubt, it comes on it says I can in the world not fucking me over. I'm going to talk to me and my friend I wanted you want to show and it worked out, but it was like he was convinced he was going to get fucked over. He got fucked over he's like I know it and then, and then he got the gig is like what what is happening.

He's gonna be on the show, greater love. I love that guy to death. You know I enjoy one. You hear stories about people remembering where they came from and to help people out and when I was doing a result of Sunday comics at Fox and it wasn't. It didn't start out. Well I've. I always want to going to detain the troops, but when I got landed with CBS they said not yet you may end up popular gone anyway. So when the which came home I had show it got cancelled. So another different story: I want to talk about. Story, all the all, the always interesting, it's a great store. So I I go to the to twenty nine Palms marine base pull up in a limo, we blow anything up down and anything down up, and I said I'm a like this place, so we go into George Lopez, when George Miller couple of comics- and I said so- I got to Jeff Altman and he's the host and I gotta shake his head blood smearing him in a high hat walks away. Oh, what's this So they say:

later in the show this at some Jeff. We have this kid got a purple heart he's back now. And we want to unite him with his mother and he goes that's kind of corny and he walks up again I'll. Do it, and so I go hey how you doing call police. Well, you know I missed my family That's great 'cause. We bought your mother into be like yeah, the crowd goes crazy and they said that on his job. I said yeah give me a dollar more than him and I took over to set the comics at night, wow yeah yeah, so I mean so then they say we go from like one hundred to seven in the ratings and they said what do you want? I said I want you, hire this kid Kenny Rogers and is my head writer and let's hear it, and I said we want makeup, put letters from prison in one hundred dollars. But not sherry said when you told me what I want is what I want, so they Hiram they fly him out. I pick him up at the airport. We drive to my place Marina,

training course which floor is yours. I got all of my living in like a three million dollar place at the time he goes. This is incredible, so we get jammed up for three days and the third day comes down he's all banged up his money goes. I love you remember it was. I got away from Now I can't put this up. I really need the job. It's ok, alright will go to work. So we drive, we drive down to Fox and we put my pocket space at the top of the roof. It's great and we're going by a current affair which used to be Maury. Povich. Is you said you people suck you shouldn't even have all these officers getting cold? Sweats rights in one kilometer radius, they get all the stuff, so we go down and uh I said in my secretary hold on my calls. We go in my office and it's three countries so why three couch- and I said when people come out they might want to nap right. So nice, ok, Mister collected ready for Kenny, so I bring Kenny, intimate, produces and I said just come by the office when you're done so twenty minutes later he comes first,

You know I can't believe you're the fucking boss, you know what they told me. My job is to make you happy, oh, he was great. That show was great show, but it was a crazy thing attached to that with your agent that wound up Falcon over notch. Is you but a slew of people? One guy Bob weight problem was the star agencies that would work with. The fund was the name of the spotlight on now. He fucked everybody I felt like nine dollars. I think site felt that when I popped when I get lenny- and I was make it all sorts of money they should you need an agent. I said I want side felt and let us agent, you know and at the same time he was doing both of them. So I think these guys are the biggest guys in the business and he screwed them, but they got their money I was like the lowest guy in the totem pole, so I I screwed like two million dollars Jesus at

I made and that it was bad. I remember people try to keep you from telling yeah I what I thought it was: kids went to school and everything about the it can do that. You know he'll, let it go yeah, but it took a lot whatever. That is that, guy still in the business country he's in I didn't know. If they get the memo far hello yeah it was, I was I was. I was so pissed I mean, because not only did I I I have the show, but when I went to everything was going good and I invited Barry Diller to to to at fox. He was the head of fox at the time I to a party for the attack cast the crew, everyone at Fox and it would they all showed up, and you know I had I showcased. A bunch of my friends, so they could get jobs and Barry Diller goes from it. You really done a great job for us. I said I really love. You know working with you, Mister Dulles, okay,

so later, in the night this uh this asian man came up to me goes. You know everyone likes you, but I don't get it and I said well, stick around OP saying you'll catch on and I didn't think anything of it. The next morning I had chip, but they give me like a million dollar bonus and they raised my weekly salary. I'm it was a lot of money but like over to my inbox, and I was going to Dallas to do that at Texas state Fair, would one of the main trail sis's, not not early and are there are just some crazy name, and I let and then Dallas and he caused me said. I got good news and bad news. I said give me the bad news here: did you have a problem with the chinese guy last night? It said no oh yeah yeah, I guess so I guess. Well, that's Barry Diller's right hand. Man, you've done, they throw you off the lot. They said, I said: what's the Good NEWS here: we've got your money and I go I I want my job. I should. Let me apologize to the guy, didn't mean it. I didn't know they don't know they've already,

and other stuff out of your office and put in boxes and you're done an now. I do the state fair and I'm going mad this. This sucks. You know I mean I want to get back to LA. To try and salvage. N Korea, not 'cause. I made this is another work that I'm no longer come at just from one conversation to I've got stories, but I wish I'd never open my mouth, I mean I've no one's as as up my life more to myself and unintentional yeah right. So what we're doing the state fair and this course with a black board, goes out of control and the horses ring and a buck what's coming towards the prevailing there, so I grabbed him. The Mandrell girl get around with just this whole thing is wiped out and I said: did you get that they kept on tape? You know, but that was, that was the end of my career at Fox. That's

Easy from one conversation. Where guys he didn't like you about this about when I'm I'm at a pay have lady at CBS and it was still good and then the bulk of the Gulf WAR came out that that that can and then they brought me back and we were hanging on by a thread and they said, listen forget about the show with we think you're, a great actor. Let's give you a movie deal and really see how any of it first picture two million dollars and and then expect to be not first of a million and a two man and to maybe five eight dot. Three picture deal You know. I can't believe this happened. Is that one question? Can you act that I said hey, I'm making believe I'm having I get out I was only get that was that was pretty good get out, and I and I I just because we have five by being funny and and it- and I said I'll, never do that again so leaf like that's going to happen true romance

oh yeah, oh yeah, so I mean I get I get clean, I get straight. I work on the lines I'm ready, so I go over an it's Ridley, Scott and his brother wanted Famous Scott direct. Is a kid comes out. I saw many people in there. Thirteen, that's because I was like to know how many were in the room, because you wanted one. So I walk in and it and I look at the paper She ready I'm going. I thought a script on the floor. I guess I guess you already owes him, but I've hit on the left I was hitting fright. I said you better like it could have like pushy again. I guess what was it say. Look pushy, I said, write the script. He picks up. It says like pushy, I said if you like it, we could write everyone. I know it breaks out, get out get out of my office saying well that was going again, so I'm driving home agent Cosmesis. What did you do to prep? He said you were pretty inactive, but you gotta get off the drugs. I said I haven't done coke in two weeks. I was serious for this part who they get it to Tom

nice morphic with this now just dance alaris, guys who were like yeah up to their neck and cocaine. Yeah yeah. Oh my god, that's crazy that they got that upset. Having fun pretending, I'm having fun with you, making believe I'm having fun with you want it just, although 'cause I thought we prepared to having a baby and giving you offering your millions of dollars of God. It isn't this nice. You know that's a problem with people that have so much power. They want you to suck their dick every second of the day and as soon as any deviation at all, they think you're. Well, think you're smart as that you're done in this time. You know we don't have power, you have guys sleep with women to get hit. I had a woman told me she wanted to fuck me, but she was hideous.

At night in the morning I'm going to Jesus, I'm not even drunk I get back. I don't know now. No, I didn't get that job either she's Christ, yeah, I mean there's looked. There was casting couches for both sides. There was, I knew, a lady who bang all these like sad little act guys? She was always she was casting. Lady and she'd. Have these little sad actor guys only look all squeamish Should I go? Look at her she's got that Guyana robe too, and she would bang 'em all to get these guys. Part in chief uh come on she was aggressive. I'm it's me out. You know, because I but I want thing is, though, does no victim there. Now nobody feel sorry for those guys at all, not even for a second, a guy that Fox a lady was a casting director like hey

he decided to do what he wanted to do was like it's. It's such a different thing than a guy being a casting agent that fox the actress. I would a dry cleaner for free dry, clean. I mean it's, it's not! You know it's just a matter of what. What do you want to do it all up and is that something about all it's a different animal? It's funny yeah the the the, but that, role models out the window now, with all this Metoo stuff and after Weinstein got shot down. I don't act, I've retired from acting. So I would like to see what it's like now and wonder how much different it is. How much it's changed. You know, but it's changed quite a bit recently Joe. I gave Lewis a shot at the club after he heard about that, and you know we called me up at hey. Do you mind if I do a spot- and I thought about, I said yeah sure no problem yeah, I like Louis, doesn't arrested or convicted of anything and yeah. So I put him in he did fantastic

it cause me. So what do you think I should yeah edit man after that evening? The backlash was just unbelievable: yeah I go. How long is enough? What is gonna have to do to try to get his career back up right, but he? What is the backlash, though, because the backlash is not your your the actual customers right. It was just the grab, some female comics lab work and that I'm working for me and that's said that MIKE lock the doors and put a sexual predator on stage and then it was like when they're enjoyed Louie, and you know I'm just trying to help a friend get right K, a k meant and he walked out of a I give a big hug us yep. We got a problem, I got now you get what I want to call you if that right it give me a number He didn't give me and it goes that's not right now. I know that's what I told him. I said so. Too much legislation. Germany leads me to think everything here: a guy who didn't touch any women that fact he touched himself. That was the problem.

They just happen to be in room- and I said you could have jerked off for me, so I should get on my shirt with my shirts pretty expensive. I said, but if these are people who gave a job to the people that turned on, he gave jobs to and there's not right. Well, there's a lot to that. I don't know if there's a lot to that story, that would make him look very different in a lot of these people that are accusing him and one day I think going to tell us. So he I had a conversation with him about it. It's not as cut and dry as everybody thinks everybody thinks he had power over these women and he pulled his dick out and start no. There was a lot of those a lot thanks talk. It was a lot of flirting. There was a lot going on it. Wasn't that simple and he's very, we could about yes very very, and he knows he by the way he hadn't done anything like that in more than a decade, it was a long time just he's he's gotta kinky thing. I can't I can't I can't reject off

The neighbors are home. I'm a wreck here that make weird faces, so it would be fun for anyone, but I'm glad God now he's a good guy rapist sexual predator touch anybody he caught the First part of the wave yo you know like if you're in the ocean and it could be in the ocean on a fuckin' surfboard and you just catch this little tiny wave when everything is fine or you could FA cup and be in the right spot when that Jaya wave comes and slams you in the head and you have the same intention in the same person another in a show times in history. He would have been fine, he would probably be fine today, because everything is kind of this enough of the femur emails that have come out that have been full of shit like Asia, Argento and the girl accused Chris Hardwick, and then Chris Hardwick released These text messages that show that she actually cheated on him and she wanted him back and she's just trying to punish him for all this, but there's a a few of those situations now where people realize what there's this definitely

natural predators is definitely bad men and but there's also women who are taking advantage of this movement write an. I think the world is so like calm down a little like the Asia Argento thought one was a big one. You know when she doubt that she was calling Harvey Weinstein a rapist. While she was fucking seventeen year old she played his mom in a movie ten years ago, when he was seven. It's like Jesus. Right like how could you? How could you have that kind of hypocrisy, but there's a lot of and people that are the screaming for attention at the front of the line of a lot of these things. A lot of them have like dark secrets themselves. Yeah, and These people that don't want a guy like Louis to have a road redemption. They don't want him to work or even a guy like Aziz on sorry, which is even worse. He had a bad date with a girl wearing a bad date where she blew. I'm like three different times and didn't want to keep going well. He can push it bad date. That sounds pretty good. To me. It's pretty good

it's better than no blowing right yeah, but it's the whole thing was so crazy. It's like he either there's more than one side to every story like that and to take some one's opinion or someone's perception of something as one hundred percent the actual event that happened without any other evidence. This is kind of crazy. I mean, I don't think I just. I just think people have to recognize that Louis in particular, he's been out of work. He was out of work for ten months. He lost all of his shows. Last most people think he didn't suffer from that. Almost thirty million dollars show people that think he didn't suffer a crazy you're crazy. If you think you should never be allowed to work again. Well he's not a criminal right, he's not in jail. So what are you saying like he should do you still want to show everyone deserves, and that was my employer. I said sure Lewis commit you know what yeah I wanted to give a fighting chance and he is back doing clubs now and you want a lot of clubs and he was very that's it. That's always trying to do

he's just trying to get his life back. Yet you know he's building his act again doing clubs and I'm fucking releases. This whole act on Youtube. So now all that material, that's to chuck away. So he was writing during the time he was gone, but not performing right and then he puts together. You know and act that you know. Look you now as well as anybody when you have new sh it. It's got some God dam holes in it right, there's no way it comes up. I never written a bit ever, maybe one or two in my whole career. That was. That was the finish bit when I first did it on stage. Maybe one or two ever they're, always clunky into and some do you have ideas like why the that even try that one, unlike the parkland shooter bit like that, wouldn't we he was doing that bill right right now, it's in a very unfortunate bit right. Special people aren't in the club here it and the button. Who knows what that bit would have been. If someone didn't tape, it yeah, if you gave him a year to work it out, but he probably would have figured out a way to make it where it wasn't offensive and

on those kids. In the same way, my best stuff was was was years ago before cell phones before yeah I didn't know. I guess I just went out and now, when I'm on stage, I'm constantly thinking all don't go that don't don't cross that line, because you know a terrible feeling for all it's horrible, it's harder to funny shit that you and I have laughed at hard with and then someone definitely shouldn't have said- oh absolutely, they knew they should have said it. That's why they were saying that they were saying it to make the audience laugh. 'cause they're, like I can't believe you said that it's not like. He means no, that's his actual desktop, there's no malicious. Despite the diagnose, you think I want people to spend three thousand and forty bucks to go out and have Beat him up and ruin your night with your wife, your date now baby and I'm just trying to make you laugh out loud. So now it's like you know

It's just shown show. I can remember back with you and MIKE Mccarthy yeah I was like who could work the dirty you guys would be in the back just dying, yeah yeah. That would do that. Can you get high? Let's see if we can walk The broom I've seen people suck it up, but I mean that what we would like that, all my God, my one night, I was still great- and I said that led me to do that was effective, but I turned on the ground and then I felt bad 'cause. They will just so upset so discuss with and he's like regular shoes income that they started, trying to win him back give me an hour and a half to get them back, but there was another. Did I show in Orlando whatever Sakai Eclamation? Listen. If you don't shut up, I'm going to come down and poppy right in the fucking face an eye. I went, I went up to state and pop this guy right, it was played in the crowd,

was on his son. Had no fish attacking us and it took me forty five minutes just to break even you know and you kept going after you punch the guy in the face. Yeah that's amazing. It was was better. This guy went right up, and he went down was and crying wow and I went up in a beautiful life. That's the difference in Boston in Orlando advise anybody ever gave me when I was starting out. You did right after

brother gave me the worst advice. True MIKE told me to work, but it was. It was good advice at the time was smart. Like you, I I just said Joey. I think. Maybe you should try to clean it up a bit and you know yeah and let he comes over Don't listen to him. You were great kid. I love you, don't change it! Thank you. Bumped me up man. You know that there was you made me laugh. You know, because I mean I I've seen everybody. I said when I started doing comedy, but One years ago there was only one hundred comedians, maybe the whole country. You know if I heard someone I would fly to that town to go on age, isn't let's get Kennis it? You know, and you know be Slayton in San Francisco. You know people that dump and Philadelphia could people, I thought were really good at it. Might You know I would like to see what it is. You know and became friends with. All of you know that and then then it just blew up. I mean you know now you don't even have to have an active on Youtube, yeah

still have to have an acronym get in front of live audiences. Think so yeah I've seen it I've seen those Youtube guys each shift yeah, but they do drop people out to the club for awhile. Don't do it for what the trick people for a little bit unless they become good. Then, in the keep put in the work into the act I mean and and and you know, develop an act, but the emu either can do what you don't Jerry Seinfeld once at I famously that, If you're famous, you have a good, buys you thirty, seven yeah yeah by two thirty seconds in front of a crowd. They're happy you there to give me thirty seconds after that, like okay, what we're left oaks, what

What country he's a fucking good joke writer? He still still up smeared off still slanging Tommy store. Every now and again, I think he's still in Branson has a gathering branches, but he comes down to the store and I worked with him. A couple of times he's good he's got rights he's got new material. He looks good too he's healthy and then yeah, but like those Youtube guys, They have a. They have a short cut right now. Is there they make funny videos on you too. They said, they'll get a crack, out, even though they're not really funny, but if they put in the work they can pull it off. But it has been done. The most courageous if I ever saw, was Charlie Murphy, yeah 'cause charge Murphy was essentially a famous open mic are right and that guy would he started out hosting? It would be him. And and Bill Burr and they would do the shows together and Charlie. I had never done stand up, but he had the most famous brother ever

I mean is my brother- was fuckking. Eddie Murphy and people who saw him on the Chappelle Show Bell, show really loved him set him up. So he famous and then the guy who balls of fucking steel man. I did a toy need to show tour with him and he had. The been doing comedy for two years and I have been doing comedy for more than twenty. We were co headlining. So I would headline one night. He would headline the other night and I mean to be able to go on after a guy who's been doing comedy twenty four years or whatever the fuck. It was yeah and go on. After him and do forty minutes when I've only been doing yeah just balls that had yeah and he would just go on out there, like you own the place but passed away right, yeah she's lost away

yeah about a little over a year ago, and I think all the people that we work with that that they're, not here anymore, allowing him gone. My good God said the ones that suck still there. Worked it out. You always make it a point at at, but people still material one of the biggest face that Evelyn was Ali, Joe Press. I never met him, but he was is big, bright, big fat, redneck guy and will work and doubts of some place, maybe Florida and we're in the green room any watches the tonight show at it sought and worked on the late show and cast it comes up. That's his monologue at this mileage able Joe Brady he went out and did

and gosh. It's model locker understand innovation. I've got no one will ever know there was no bcis back. Then there were no tapes. There was nothing. I got at least one image made you so much. Ok, yeah, but I do it better. I got no, you don't just be at a setting that way into it. Man it's off yet, but I do it better, protect his young kids yet, but I do it better. Well, you know back the day in the Catskills Times they all stole, like is duas no honor amongst thieves back then, and everyone just had jokes. There were just joke jokes, like you almost had like Tool Box, and I needed three slash eight now and then, as television came along and people started getting in trouble for stealing. You know Robin get in trouble and a few other guys got in trouble and then sort of died off. Until, like I mean when you tube long then it kind of killed it there's still a few thieves that are still running around

this day and some summer famous, but most of the audience knows now and if you look at someone who is a thief and then you look at their instagram comments or cold shed people go after them. People know now they know it's the darkest thing you can do when a guy works or a girl forever on a bit and then is come along with the finished product snatch it and switch a couple words around and pretend pretend you came up with. On your own. When I started, I was working as a janitor in City Hall in Cambridge, and I took the other janitors out for bears and we went to the Springfield station. We saw Sweeney and we saw Sweeney and Bill Campbell and I'm going. Oh, my God, Sweeney was just it was a nice wow, this guy ever say anything like it had a couple. Has been scuppered comics when I make the JANET said, you're funny it in this case you should so. I talked to George with all about it at school the next day, and he goes yeah man. You should be a comedian but once that was that's what you saw last night, so and we listen to Woody Allen Album and I even know what

Woody Allen from his mobile and he was a comedian and he did that joke about hitting a moose up in Maine. So I went on and have been on stage before it went on at the thing. How is Springfield streets alone, and I did this and it was unbelievable. I changed all my every standard supplies like a sterilization, and afterwards this little guy comes in tobacco Smith. Thank you very funny, but you shouldn't use Woody Allen material. What do you think you could manage it, and that was it? That was it I suck for months. I said, but it was all mine. You know it was yeah, there's a lot of guys in the beginning that Greg Fitzsimmons and I steal from each other gotta deal, though, like a fuse on, because we both only had like fifteen minutes and we do a half, so I would fifteen to his still fifteen of mine- and we were best friends now yeah, so we gotta go. Do that blowjob material killed in fuqing Pawtucket

No, I said, take anyone. I said Kelly that was fucking brilliant. That shows you fucka morning at three witcher 'cause. I never thought I don't know what I was doing. I can't remember if I can't. I can't remember you know I mean I just guys don't we do as you got to be, I mean for Joey offstage with a notebook yeah. You got to go say that again talked. I said you know who used to do that might benefit MIKE Dial Yogurt, because my tournament, when I saw him wow this guy, so just Great will take you about everything and I used to take come out after shows and taken a to breakfast, and he tell me she's, listen! I'm going to tell you everything you did wrong. There's no need for me to tell you what you did right 'cause you can tell, but everything you did wrong and he would listen All my god. You know and he helped mold me and he helped make me technically a better. If I owe him a lot, it might come with,

he helped me as well. He told me to record all my sets. Yeah told me to get it till tapes to this day. Joe treats you like you never know, you never know. You might say one thing and you forget you say it, but that one thing might be a bit ten times better Joe. I listen to him and I typed everything. There's boxes should never miss once, but I was doing a Lenny Bruce thing. I used to tape, and so I didn't realize he was taking his act. I thought he would stay. Documents from so you know he man, so I would write when I first started doing it. I would write for hours and I would go down the kitchen same. What do you think it is, and I tell her gestures- I don't know I guess

how do you like she said. I really like that rip tail. I got ripped out of the bucket. You know anything about the shipment, I recommend she goes that's. Why hides make fifty seven varieties get over it? You don't really funny person in the world right now, so yeah she was in taking his shirt, so I'm working at the dunes what day and Pauly Shore come out by the pool in polish zloty I turn around. Who is he with but rip Taylor right? So I can look at that one and then I said I said: Mister Talley watch a copy bread. Yeah. Well, I guess so I said: would you just can't talk to my mother said: bring

phone out there to pull. This is hello Jean it's ripped alien here, so he is so nice to him right now and then it gives me a function. I told you it was funny idiot. I end up doing Hollywood squares room got to be friends with a good guy, good guy that he made me laugh like he was funny. He was a hilarious guy. He was well the Hollywood squares mean he took over that show. If you saw Hollywood squares and rip Taylor, wasn't on you like with the funny one he's the guy. You want to hear talk yet Donovan told me to all my sets and he you know he would you explain to you what the meter to all that was something the young comics to this day. Don't understand the first time I ever heard that you broke the. What and- and I do

even realize I was doing it yeah and and now what I'm working with guys that I like the idea, I see you, don't listen, you don't need the that drop drop. The the you! Don't you don't need that the jokes fine! Without it you know yeah I had. I made a whole you don't don't don't do it? I do, but you can do it. When it's necessary, when it's necessary will mean more. If you don't have ten other unusual well unnecessary MIKE, you know he he tends to use it where he won. Let's use it and worries about the guys on in front of him. You know he goes. I don't want you You want it just for the sake of doing you know, and he was he makes a great guy and he still tapes every show. Great comic in yeah. He's is very aware that you can the audience get numb to that. Word more. Tell me anything right where, if you don't hear it until he goes up and then when he close up. You only hear it when it's necessary. It makes it's a present. Patient issue 'cause. If there's a guy in front of you, some comics would use the word thought the same way. These use the word dumb, though, like

like in guy with the fucking things. Looking good he's got his fucking hat on his fucking. Shoes are tide in this parking. By the time you say, and I'm like fuck you, it doesn't mean anything right. He still open for Leno. He would say to me you know you're really funny, but you don't have to be that filthy. You don't have to, I said yeah, but but I feel like I'm selling out your not sell. Are you cashing in and my mother I was just said you can get more work and then sat it on corporate cakes and people said. Listen, let me we don't care, if you're mildly amusing. As long as you know, A flock everything anyway yeah in my flight, two thousand and thirty grandage sites of autograph yeah yeah. So I mean so. You did sell off yeah. Those are those are tempting. That's the siren song, those corporate gigs yeah 'cause. I remember like that's like that's. Where J made most of his money, oh yeah, I mean he would make hundreds of thousands of dollars.

He needs it. You know, well, that's why I said you know he never spent his tonight, I'm not much by daddy money The money went to cars and all that money came from gigs yeah and he never put out a special had one special on show. Time way back in the day in Chile, yeah, yeah, that's right, member that this special and I talked him, but he goes haywire. Why do that? Because I put my act, He goes on to give me with his a give me a million dollars because it's going to cost me money, but his whole thing was he didn't want to do it because that material was gone yeah once he did it right, but the, but he would go to these places. And do the same act like two years in like what the, but he just had this Polish people tell me a man. I really don't care for my son Sorry, I said, listen me. I said I used to open from and when I was at nicks and I was supposed to do twenty minutes in whatever I was opening for someone. I do my time and get out. That's just respect and he came in. He goes

Ah, okay, so the quality Inn anyway. So now I do about forty. Five and understanding of crowds go crazy. Someone could have, in my mind, have gone. Follow that fuckery. You know what I mean he gets onstage within two minutes. I was like when he was that, USS Tuesday was Tina. Coffee is amazing, don't know they don't know Chris when he used to go on Letterman back when is young, that crazy, dark hair and he was he was the edgy com. Oh yeah, which is hard for young guys to show he said he would do a two hour show and it was in too much right. You know it was killer, yeah, yeah he's. Extremely underrated as a as a contact number, and I think it's unfortunate that he doesn't have like a great body of work other than to

show, monologues, people. Think of him, as the guy with tonight show model he's a great stand of grass and a is the up at any and everyone that that I see that is, is really I give it up. You know it's, but that is the thing you make me laugh. You know I like if it if a successful in it, I'm not getting on that. You know it's good. You know? I mean I don't belittle anybody for this? Yes, I'm the same way you know, but but if you make me laugh that I I pay to go see if you had the last, It's a waste of time to worry about something you don't like 'cause. Obviously other people, like it yeah. I feel the same way about music, don't a lot of music I don't like its foot, they sell millions of albums. I don't care yeah, there's no room. I do I do I just want to. I just want to laugh. If you can make me laugh, that's that's why some of the people I hang around with just go. When we go out, we go out to dinner. Everyone puts their cell phones on the table off beautiful

This is gonna, be a nice. You got a, we have a kid, so it is something that would take you down, yeah god, so many people are interested and just look at the phone all right now, if I wasn't he is, is all the same. If I was a young kid coming out now, I'd be an animal because I wouldn't care and it you can so that all I would not be tired right now. You know, and I know the thing was you know when I started people say: oh my god, what a funny take on that. I was not funny. It was when I actually thought, rather than you know, popped up alone and take them know, I'm crazy. I just oh yeah 'cause. I I've never thought it was funnier than anybody just know that I'm sick and I just use that as the under the guise of humor. It works yeah yeah, you know it works, but we were very lucky that in those days in Boston I mean I started in eighty eight, but in those days there was

remember in Warrenton Stream, you had you had the comedy at the Charles we're up. The above downstairs was connection right over here was next button over there was duck soup right, that's fucking, crazy! It was funny God he opened one club. What was that club in up in the browsing the hotel Brad? What was in the basement, Joker? Ok, this place would hold over three hundred beautiful room at one night. I had my binder comma here, make sure it might find it. I said she's gonna documentary right now in the store, I said, do some time, I'm in the back. It backstage don't lights and he brought show the dressing, and this is now. This comedians are hard at work, while the other comedians are on up chop up like Jesus Christ, I used to do blow. Onstage people got relax, relax, it's just stunt coke, it's not real, you know! So, there's no other place like that, like the scene in New York, was very different. The scene in New York there's never did

sting thing the way they did in Boston. There wasn't as many clubs that were like close together. I would talk to the crowd yeah. I would know Joe right right. We knew from back. Then there was it's a different. Now now there's a lot of jokes, but the I think I attribute that the size of the rooms in New York you're on top of people. That's the first thing I notice. When I moved to New York, I was I gotta fuckin' audiences. Literally would be like, I would be staying on Asian. You would be the front runner. I yeah everyone's, so close, yeah catch a rising star, yes and you feel yeah. This yeah they're on on stand up New York state on your on top of you, I used to go down. I take the train down and stand a light weight for number to go on it. Catch and I put down last cause us from Boston, and I got when I turned it down and go hey man. You know his attend a subject and they give it about that. I might get under the night out and go back, and I do that for years and finally, some good like bells- it was good to me and even Piscopo gave me a break and some other guys, but MIKE

what do you go to any office with the with the with it? Let's move why why go to? Let's? Let's have them come to us with that thing, always just like an explosion. Yeah there, it's the! There's no place like that scene and I feel so lucky that I started stand up in eighty eight in Boston. I feel like I just caught this way. You know yeah. It was what made you leave Joe ninety one I think, or ninety two Did you go to New York or La New York New? I got by Jeff Sussman. Ok, that's when I moved to New York, then that way. Driving limo. Then, when you went to la what the baseball show, you got hard boiled MIKE stop. Yeah and and the funny thing about my ex that I always wanted to work with him. I just he's a great guy It is a great idea, a ton of incredible audio work, so we do a movie together. We do something up in Canada and we get in a beef

doing my star Jack gently. Yes, two, if by sea, yeah yeah yeah, that's it so eight. I said that I said something that was it we would drink and, and we were drinking like Labatt's black I You get the hang over before you get high, it was dead and powerful schitt right. He said something that goes hey man. I waited ten years to work with you, it being a dick and he said something I leap over table. Fight broke out? They had a business yeah, oh yeah. I wish I was on him like a spider monkey. So, but I was I was. I was like three hundred and fifty at the time. So would I another item he went down and broken update rolls out and walking out. He goes. You know very disappointed in you disappoint me funk you up this point video, I waited all this time to work with and we made up Never the same! You know what year was that shit? I don't know long long time ago, probably twenty five years ago, yeah yeah so handy one hundred and ninety two.

All those. Probably before I met him, yeah yeah. I would have them in ninety four yeah yeah. I just last night on on dumb and dumber. It's a great day. Yeah he's a great guy, yeah yeah. He has a nice. I you know I was stricken have This should happen? Well, you know it was the per diem. You know what my first couple made me: sick, a predicament what's issue. Well, this is put them on and what's the point where you know to buy food, what we get fed? Well, you know it so so I spread that right. I don't know you could save it. You spend it and I would be God. I was shipped by something. It was crazy. You know, but it was fun. You learn yeah. You learn yeah um yeah, so I moved to New York in uh. I think it was either ninety one or ninety two and then I moved out here in ninety four. So I wasn't in New York very long and then you get news radio now yeah. I got hard bog

canceled. That was a terrible show that, but it was on yeah was at Fox yeah. I was one of Fox's. First shows I don't think so. No, no man, with children and simpsons, and there was a lot of shows on there. They would do in sitcoms, though that's why yeah one another yeah just wasn't very good. It was a lot of. It was also an interesting thing to see that the pilot was really funny brewer was in the pilot yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah, the pilot was great, but the pilot was made by. Creators of the show and then once the network decided to pick it up, then they started bringing these network hacks to come. In turn into some bullshit fucking show, and it was terrible they rewrote scenes and it was. It was a disaster, so I got to see like how really funny writers and really funny actors can put together a really funny pilot and then that show could turn to dog. Because of network meddling in executive meddling and then to go from that to radio, which was like the polar opposite that was just they got. They didn't give Paul Sim.

Much grief at all. They let him do whatever the heck. You want it because he was coming from Larry Sanders show and they knew he was brilliant and then they had you know, working with filter know hardly Hartman. That's even worse. David stabilization, crazy cat, incredible it was, it was the luckiest gig ever I couldn't believe it. I've been working with those. I never even took acting lessons. You know I mean I I had a couple acting, they made me get a coach when I first got a development deal and I think I took like four or five lessons with this lady. So I had give me a deal and they said you gotta take acting lessons yeah. So I went to the sacrificing this one: ok, okay going to be a tree, so it kind of tree that big tree, it's kind of a tree that big willow, I don't know, will jumping ok in this. In this same we're on everyone, quite an like ants about ants ants. I got it, that's it. I said I see you later what I don't know why it would be an edge 'cause. What

movie. I get to be a giant, that's not what I'm looking for and I left and I get let me to later, and everyone quit the class still like thirty people in the glass they all. Let me go to Shari's they all fucking quit. It was crazy. Well, the problem with acting classes. I mean it's good to practice. To learn how to read lines and this, but it's just pretending. And it was a crime not saying I'm Daniel Day, Lewis or know how to do it like one of those guys, that's a different level of acting that, if you're on a sitcom right and if I'm going to sit com, I'm playing a guy like me right and it's just it's just like stand up but easier, that's what it felt like much is similar way. People said what what was it difference? I said: well the difference between doing a sitcom there's a camera and something goes wrong. We take it again at a nightclub people control Aerosmith

Jesus saves to come and see me at at stitches all the time, and I had no idea who they want so much. You know what it is. I suggest some Arrowsmith said that the thing would have biggest rock bands were they go? You know I was in the disco because it was the difference. If you could dance you could get late night you dance I was up. I was like I was like triple I said I would feel I would say it was fun it was. It was crazy, so they want. Yeah. They could stop that. So he was a fat guy but that was like glacier, but they come in. They said we want you to open oh yeah, no problem, so I go up to the Orpheum theater. This is one of many come back soon after they were still getting high thing, so I go in with the crowd is going in and they said, hey man, I heard there's a comedian. We're going to fuck him up and I'm listening to some God. They made under comedians myself, some guys letting money. So they call me put it down. I said: well, I'm going to him now

will you go on a stage? Don't even know they had a stage toy, so I go back in there all I mean it was fucking wild. So I go on stage and they start pulling right event? Is like runway lights, Aerosmith, decent kredible lights? I couldn't see any, and this is but for thirty, eight dead from my boss, wells and powers of smashing. All around me right handed fuckyou, banger, Dodge and shoot. I can't see it coming till right now. Let's us so this kid throws a milk that hits me in the balls drops me to my fucking knees like got milk dud up here, yeah right that natural look all Steven Tyler, hatches body. I drag me through the curtain, 'cause I'm right by the curtain. A backing up on trying to get it. How much? we couple. What is come back tomorrow night, so go back to the next night,

rolling stones hours read the great if you entered into like a rally, and I don't want to go to Japan when I said so. You gotta figure work. Well, you learn, I think, if you could come, We learn from mistakes. If you don't you're not going to you're not going to proceed, and I did I had. I had the pleasure working with who I work with. Who is pretty woman who said she no not for the guy who sang pretty oil personally offices yeah. I think that's about my my direct. So I'm with I'm with Kenny were up about three days I swear to. I got to go to pushed him open for Roy Orbison, I'm almost out of gas. I might have blow I'm exhausted. I pull into this place and I go up and is this food picking in this whole table all this food and I had to eat so I just thought rather likable

I follows right. I I I I get Bush be back what I only companies all in black he's got those glasses and it's funny voices. You did comedian, I said yeah. He goes to print watch like each other, for my job is right back to what I do is show great show. I come back voice, you're, fantastic man. You want to go at I gotta get some of you have to blow yeah. Well, yeah. It was so good to me. Oh man, it goes let it Funniest comedian, I've never seen that went to Vegas and Vegas. Well, he was great, it was. It was amazing. The only person of all before that I really had was JUICE Newton. She was such a

to make matters. Really. I was a young guy. You know what I was doing, the Cape cod Melody tent. You know she was like a country star, Once she one hand, I Yes, she was made now yeah, so my butt high school Oh she was dressed in workout. Well, yeah! Is that what she was supposed to be now she was just pushed them. I don't know, they should want a comedian of, I don't know it on it. I was excited about meeting. You know she's a star the, but to play with it. Okay, our hearts or Someshit Atlanta. She had one big hit big hit. I had a buddy of mine was who was in love with her. He had JUICE Newton poster on his wall yeah every time I go over his house like what the yeah. He writes this time because along time ago I don't even know who that guy is anymore. I don't remember his name, he was MIKE, but you know who opens up from

Alka is Brewer yeah tours with them, and apparently he's fucking sensational, a big fan- and he does a game, show yeah and and he's so good, the guy was, it really is great. I love he's one of the most underrated guys who really he's just so he doesn't give a no it does. He just want to make a living have a good time is not trying to get Famous annuity is, but if you get a chance to see Jim Breuer Holy, she took the white kids to Africa. He stumbled the trip to Africa from Metallica. No, no just well. I think they were there, but he moved away from kids over there. So it's gonna take my kids to Africa, but they were going to have to get malaria shots. Also. I don't want it to that. What I mean, but not only that, but you know this is like

lions gate out of my life and I don't get. This thing is going to suck my kids. No, but wait. Wait! Wait! Let me finish Skillet H by Jim, well that that works. I don't think that works. I don't think it works that way. Well, we we have like out yeah, but that was when everybody was worried about a lot of shows, not just Maine. But in the 80s that was one of the big fears. Was that mosquitoes mosquitoes going to give you know one guy would have HIV whiskey to bite, they would fly over to you and then give it to you, but but then again I'm some like monkey into tree a tree monkey distant date that that isn't that out, It stinks that. I think this is there's a lot of confusion, but they think it was probably from Hunter who was hunting among and thank the monkey on an infected cut himself. While he was cleaning the monkey along

is guarding the monkey, because this is a very common thing, sounds disturbing, but what they call Bush meat SH media is basically any kind of me from any kind of thing. They shoot in the woods and they would shoot monkey so that when I was a slight push, it was a whole different things to different things. Yeah yeah, I I was on the back when they were Bush's, he looks in call girls. Well, you know a Bush people are with the funky to talking about like no one has a bush anymore. Oh god, that's porn porn changed the game, they change the change. That's the the biggest influence of pornography in american culture is not just that people watch it, but it changed the way people groom their pubic,

yeah. I grew up mind I like Shavon model is, it makes me feel younger, yeah good move once we get greats like this person, yeah and- and it is just a little yeah Bush, but anyway that's how AIDS, apparently they think H. I v spread from patient zero was a a guy who cut himself while he was cleaning the monkey is cutting out a monkey. Well see it's informative show. I did not at work yet be wrong about that. I was wrong about the mosquitoes, don't be hard and I don't think that is uh is transmittable say: malaria mosquito mosquito Is malaria? Yes right! Well, what's the difference between a good chunk of blood going into it? You know I mean I don't think it works the same way. I just think

more difficult to transmit, which is one of the reasons why men typically don't get it from sex. They get it from needles. You know: women get it from sex because a guy comes inside of you and you know that's how you get HIV. This is a medical talk, one hundred and one NPR. We appreciate your donations without your donations. We can operate, send that some will give you a nice handbag. Now they keep your Bush clippings in. We still doing radio. Does he still do radio and ask him once a week. I think He does a little not doing They was on Zlx for a couple years was making good money to is radio in Boston anymore. Uh. Well, is this case. There's still kiss and

arrange a was the pioneer yeah with the five also live yeah many hours of that that really helped boost comedy. He was a big proponent, yeah, hey! He help. He helped me an awful lot of Memel. Well, one night he came, and he said you know he's gotta make the more familiar. Smack you around, because you know just thinking he said Did you come on by show. I said I don't know how to do radio she's, like your best committee, I'm the best dj to work. I tried We were selling out theaters it was just incredible. Every time we going to show it promote it, was it incredible and I really I really appreciated his help at all, but uh. Now, unfortunately passed I went to see his ago. How did he get to see him two weeks before he died? This is MAX in the mass general, so I went in and I started laughing and then nearly choking her. I said man what's going on and he says. Oh you know it's not.

Good linear. We gotta couple of days it rains. He said no, I said so. I kissed him on the forehead. He goes. You know him and I love you, but I I guess shipment, do I keep Saturday. I thought it was from mosquitoes. I can't be taking a shot again. What happened I don't know you know I don't know, but when they get a lot of things went bad. You know- and you know, is Matty in the morning. Still around always says you just crazy all he was. He was huge back when I was delivering newspapers. Yeah he's gonna, be on the air. Almost forty now had a tv show before the radio gig. Why would you got the? I did that you did that show what well he crossed my mind to and trust you yeah and I flipped out by a threat. The four item. So I went on the sports channel and I will drop one hundred pounds and fight Maddie Siegel children's and castle

who put the chairs will donate. The chip will put lounge chairs in the it the venue. I think it got really crazy in the Madison? Listen, I'm sorry the and we would do an event that is mother passed away from, and I said well, how can I I am sorry I apologize so we're back to be. French kiss without friends along time, but then You know I mean sometimes people. You know, you know one thing about you that I've, always because ac I liked you before- I even knew you bad ice age. That you're, not I didn't know you, you know stucco killer, but the point is what you have such a way and and and other friends of mine that are just really dangerous people very, very calm. You know, even when people you know push you to to the limit yeah, which is good. I wish I did that because you know I've been shoe

a few times, and you know I've. I've learned to keep my hands to myself. You know God yeah, but I it, but I always was it might it. It was a an NBA player that I want to come for the Celtics. How would he I think it would ship Shalit now and I'd see guys slam him and he just turned and look you know like Logan Mankins, for the patriots people would smack in the back. He turned around and just give that look and it hurt it back, I always admired people that control the madness in on me, because I don't want to let the Genie out of the bottle. No, that's when you know things can people yeah, the jail h, you're gonna make a horrible decisions when you're in a rage, yeah yeah. Also you got to be like. If something does happen, he got to be able to see stay calm. While it's happening, then where the shots are is when people get frantic the

phone starts pumping. You start hyperventilating and freaking out. You don't see things you don't you don't you can't see things that are happy, it's how people get hurt oh yeah, you learn how to do that when, when competition right competition, you can never freak out, you never the emotional, if you're emotional, you lose all track of what's happening. If you lose your breath, you get tired, quick I know you get the package, I don't. I don't have much respect for people that the you know mma and and martial arts Allah. I remained college my freshman year of college. But a man who was a fight of good Jimmy, felt great fighter. The golden gloves Champ nominee. He said. Let me I think you could be a good fight, so he took me to this gem in Springfield and I fought this nation

period. He he was. My nigerian nightmare had only been helping a week. I would say two hundred and twenty years at two hundred and thirty five, you know, and he couldn't even spell he speak English and we got. We got no rain for the first thirty seconds I was I was awesome, but he hit me with his shot. That put me airborne. I mean I was out cold before I hit the mat and I woke up and staring down the please don't get up man please give up it's it's not, but I realize that that was it that wasn't going to work. For me, I'm at a loss about refi, probably out of fear, and just you know, to the fight or flight we are. I want to both the dead bolt get get If I can get out of his fastest. We can always a bad idea like, but the thing about bar fights two is like you're, not fighting one person. You know this other. Who's around you? You can't see them these people that hear about it on the phone they come over. The weight going come out. Oh yeah yeah hit me with bottles. Well, weren't you announcer, it great wood.

Yeah, Mansfield, yeah yeah was one of the security people and I quit during a Neil Young concert because Neil Young, with one of the things that we would do, is we would catch people bringing in booze Why does windows have to check peoples bags when they were coming in, but the other thing that we do is we try to keep order in the lawn. You know great ways that lawn area will one day during a Neil Young concert. They started having bonfires in the launch of Fuckin' concert. People are lighting fires and we had to tell these people to start put the fires out, and I remember I had a good friend, his name is Larry Jones. He was the whole. The whole The staff of employees was like there's a you guys was guy Name Alley CAT who ran the yeah. He always wanted to open up a place called libations alley. Cats, libations Invicta wills, and I remember I always remember that you want to open up a bar that was it yeah, but I'm the first time I met Alex,

got. Some guy had stolen one of the golf carts, they'd security. Golf cart. Some drunk hit stole the golf cart and they beat the fuck out of him walkie talkies. Never forget that I was like Jesus. These guys are. Plan. You know it might have been getting like twenty dollars an hour. I don't remember what the fuck yeah, but I remember thinking Jesus. I don't want to get an actual fights here. 'cause competing at the time, nineteen years old, so that was when I won the US open, and I was I was not with my at the height of competition days and this fight broke. On this lawn and they were all taekwondo black belt all like either national champions or state champions. There's like five or six of us out there and my friend who is like the nicest guy in the world. He was in some sort of altercation with this guy, and I see him slam this guy in the stomach and drop him and my fuckinf irish punching people. This is like this is bad, so I had always brought a hoodie with me because I was a coward as soon as the

let's break out, I would put a hoodie on over my security jacket, zip it up and like Falk I'm not fighting for twenty dollars an hour. So I put my hoodie on and I quit. I walked right out. The fund door with everybody else, and I just never. I didn't collect my check that week I was like you can, keep it, I'm not dying that was bras or break it out. People are taking peoples asses and hitting people with his fire everywhere, and my preservation in I was like there's no fucking way, no way, I'm getting involved in this. That was my last day on the job. Did you have a work that I mean perform there yeah? No, I never performed there. I never performed but I got to see a lot of guys. I got see, Cosby performed there. I suck in Spanish. In there I saw Rodney. This is in the Rodney bathrobe days, always so Rodney was backstage, and one of the guys who I worked with saws Hog like it would be fucking full naked. Underneath his bathroom had a giant dick Dick was hanging out. I spent hours

we shot this movie out, Maple Leafs Box and he skymarket, let's go get it so were his trailer was smoking and he starts taking this course that he takes the robot, but now he said he was just as his decker. Yes, but you never seen a man's dick before I go and not not not no, not every so relax get put something over his head. It's very funny. Happy now go yeah! Listen because I want to be careful with this dump. This stops really. I said, Ronnie Abbott, smoker thirty I'm finding us I'm telling you to bring this shift in spring this in Canoga Station. So I leave the shed and I'm out past the best way. When I live in a marina and I go with a phuckamon shopping, how you doing I got lost, he goes. I tried to tell you how well the back then they had like California Weed today is preposterous

I mean it's so strong that some people are having sex. It breaks and people haven't breakdowns and losing their mind. Get on in a mental is sexually times stronger than what we said and I smoked everyday I used to. I I used to smoke and work out a smoke. I'd ride the bike. I smoke, I'd swim. I love to smoke, I just got I got, I thought much more creative. When I was smoking, you know it's just like like underlining mean I got writers block I'm ok, but it was just I mean yeah. Now they tell me it's an now: it's legal when I did it when I did get a hide, it yeah worry about it. Now it's everywhere, what's interesting, is my wife's friends openly smoke pot now like, whereas like When I was younger, like if people found out you smoke pot there, look at you like you're, some sort of derelict, like you were doing her own yeah like you're a loser even if you were successful, even if you were working every day, even if you showed up on time, if you were sick

Robert Szczerba Little Bit mentioned. That was his big downfall there, but he smoked up in a private match up and made sure. Yes, I got him. I met him before he died, oh yeah, his downfall. Well well. Well, it was, it was apparently said: Dopesmoker type people said they don't smoke, stop it's a gateway drug. I go you don't know what you talking bout once again. I was wrong. Well, everything is a gateway drug. If you really want it to be there, No, but Rodney that those days of the bathrobe days were his best days is the a full on. I don't give a fuck days. He didn't give a fuck. It was just Friday gave Lenny one of his first big national brakes on the HBO special in who was under special with you, Lenny,

Schimmel hex Dice DOM. I write my rare casually for Barry Sobel, Barry Sobel to this day, one of the best special ever yeah it was. It was not you know, because we were out here and riding his addition, everybody for it in Mexico. Ask obsessively running as we get take a look miss kid I, same people. Would that way we don't know now and he walked through any turn, said hey if you could be in New York next week. I'll take a look at myself will be there, so we flew back the boss. We took the train down and make sure you have any. There were going to look at night, so I go into the botanist bill, Hicks sitting at the bar, but he said hey man, nice to me. I should be home. I guess it's me and you up for the best spot. You know at last bought it made a best. Man will have a drink after it's 'cause, I'm drinking now and it goes wrong. Fucking answer I went out. I punched the fucking phone, but there's a long ago I was so piston rod who wants to go first. I do so went on and I fucking broke the tie, ROD lest Jesus Christ. Now, if you want to show now, I said it's not my problem, but

Rodney's in the bathroom of course, and it's so we've got to be good friends. One night we left there and we went up to the tavern on the green and it's in the wrong he's in a bad job, but don't blow it drinking smoking and we get up. We go up the Germans are not tonight Rodney. We got some nice people on every job you cock suck suck suck. Now you want them off. A q come on Hicks when he was in his drinking stage. Yeah. Oh yeah. I only saw him after drinking. I saw him post drinking, yeah. I saw him at nicks. The first time I saw him. I saw him at the connection a Nixon a some of the connection, those two places yeah. I met what we we became friends after that, but I mean it was that was you know, a master good gag in on it. Sometimes it

the competitive juices of their comma. I don't not sure what it is is it comes out. That was the one of the things that comics have today talk about is how it is a different thing in the community. Now like the comics community is very supportive. There's no competitiveness anymore. It's not the same, because it's not like everybody is up for a limited amount of slots, unlike an h b, o young comedians, special occassion or cars, and there's none of that. In fact, every buddy helps everybody 'cause everybody does everybody's podcast, everybody supports everybody. We were together on the road together? It's like it's a different vibe, oh yeah, when I was coming up, it was like that it was all cut up, I don't always, and everybody wanted everybody to bomb after yeah. I I always felt I should look at if one of us makes it. We kicked the door out for everyone else yeah, but people will make it ahead of me and it was slamming a door shut and I fell asleep. But when I open you fuckos I'm not going away and that's why I had to go from

I come out here and it would make no money at MIT. You go, you would be funny if you already tired, ok, I'll get a red dye. John, it's so much better, and I should mention was great to me. I mean she when I broke through. That's it right there. I know I love it. So she said to me: yeah, yeah yeah, like glad oh yeah, joke joke joke I go is that It's supposed to be you know, and what is finding it to be? I don't know I really don't I know, but but but she said, yeah I gotta go away. I said no, I'm not going to allocate your regulars. What's that mean now they get? we find all is not. I don't want to pay for my parking, so I flew back and forth from Boston and he got me working everywhere and I make enough money to live out here and I did every weekend for eighteen months, but it was so smart that you did that, because you were one of the few guys that left Boston right right all these br all right Roger send. Yes, we need yeah, yeah, yeah dawn of and then got all these guys.

Toni Braxton, Toni being that there are guys that you know if they went to Boston and God staging go. Who are these guys that burned the room that they would re single time you saw in during the 80s in the early 90s. I saw some of the best standup I ever saw in my life. Where guys would murder it's hard, explain exactly yeah had to yeah, I had to had to run or you couldn't look the guys in the face yeah Rogers ago, while you're really sucked everyone was ruthless yeah. They were ruthless, but the the level of comedy was so high it like on a Saturday night. You could see Lanny Sweeney Gavin's right all on the same show yeah it was crazy and then they would occasionally at Nick's mix was the biggest culprit ness where they would bring in some local, some National Guy Skippy. Something rotten skip. Terrible family guy would sell some tickets right, but then they would set him up and they'd have to follow.

Please go follow up assassin group I mean it was, It was crazy, was a murderers row of some of the best comics ever I remember Richard Lewis came and I love Richard Lewis and I think he's a great comic, but he came in and gave goes, hey man have you seen this Richard Lewis? I said no, I guess watch the special, so I watched it when I got this is gonna be cannon fodder. He goes what I got. Listen, I'm tie it's a lot different from from film and and being on stage at next. So we came in, it was, may swing a Gavin and him and so we go on and we brought it down and he goes on and then he goes back to the hotel. Fifty seven and turns on Channel four. And see, Joyce Kohai work butchering him in a review only comes back and he goes. I can't believe this is happening. I go hey man, let's say you're great guy open. I said we'll take care of it because, really, I said yeah we told blow on flesh it out the window seals you guys would say an six months later. I do my first move

the wrong guys with him, and he says I never forget what you did by support me. He was so nice to me and I was a record into movies or it's a terrible position for a comic like him to be because he wasn't that kind of comic. The guy would Pontific eight and he had these long pauses and stories and stories had funny, but these people don't we don't want a funny joke go go go, go yeah. It had to be set up right like if he had like uh okie opener. He would have fun, which I bet he got most of the time on the road at night, not crazy, filthy God. No, no, no, no shut up silly! Funk you up not enough. Looking sad story so well. You know It was a very unusual group, guys of guys in Boston, too 'cause they're, all giant dudes like between you and

Gavin and Sweeney and knocks their big men. You know these are big, intimidating men who are doing standup. You remember the doormat Billy sure pick four hundred and eighty nearly killed me when I but dormant next yeah, so these kids come in ago. A man goes sold out its two hundred dollars. Yes, come with me. Watch down to the front row takes four kids from Charlestown Scroll, get out and puts those guys down here. Come back next, I mean that's what was it is crazy. It was insane here to keep your head down all our young comic or keep your mouth shut it down and don't get on anybody's bad side. They told I did. I was doing it the connection and upstairs was a show with a trench transvestites at that idea. People dressed up like guys dressed up like women, but I thought it was titled yeah yeah yeah, so I got in it was no. There was no heat and although he was in the

in the middle room. With the connection, I got look at these poor based it's going up there and see some guys like a singer. Dancer fresh freezing our asses off right, halftime break before the next show and Billy come storming in the back room at the connection. He goes whose line Clock and Steve Wright goes like what am I doing this? I I mean it's covered mate and they take me down to nicks and they take me down to San Diego. You know that fucking show you're making dinner at the bag. Show you made fun of were producing at you have a say that again they'll find you dead in the fucking river. You understand. Yes, I do, and then they. Let me write this fall, but that should I have So do not show you know yeah. No, they were stone. Cold killers yeah. He was friends with my buddy Joe Lake, who is my boxing coach and I brought Jolie to show on it and they wrote buddies together and Joe Lake was a savage and I'm like he's friends with this

These are patients giant animals. He said he's in jail, he was, I we're sorry, maybe maybe doesn't ever make it as apt sure he ever happened. He probably had a bad attorney yeah. It was a bunch of animals that and people literally getting paid in Coke yeah, my first gig down in Florida. I did place in Sarasota and it was great we can a guy. Yes I'd. Show gentle way to grand to go see. How do you want I want it in cash or cocanougher about half and half so they gave me up. Never happened. Cocoa yeah, it was nuts. Then I got whacked out went the But is she jacket it's because I know that it is any good. How did you get it right? I really don't know I was like I was so fuckedup back. Then it was like time travel. You know you could give me blow and booze in it

Aaron, I could end up from Sarasota to Tampa. You look at that in a map. That's not an easy gig, that's not it the trip and I would just show up gps homing pigeon. Now we're doing it like a second blow come on in I figured out how to get there, God, Christ. My remember we used to call when you get a gig back in the day and then some of them, New Hampshire and some weird fucking lodge you. At the lodge in Salem to Hampshire. Might, ironically, I stop doing this strippers male strippers, but you know what the high schoolers male strip right and it- and I said I'm I'm seeing you know and I gotta do comedy between Kathy is a Kathy O'Malley here, your kid down and hurt his head. Show us your. We get the direct and so it just you have to write him down our legal right. I guess right down, take a right at the fork and then you go

two miles so this road yeah right it send it. It's in Salem, you'll find it that's it. That's a so small when you get there one night, he had me work in Rhode, Island Massachusetts and New Hampshire, three gigs, an egg. In a night. That's a lot of drivers. You get bill without I did what okay it'll get killed. The killed someone who's a grad Rhode Island was always fun and what can isn't what? When I first met Candice and store? I said: oh, my god, it was like a red, well I've, never seen anything like I've. Seen everybody right. This is so I call him my god. You gotta see this fucking guy he's not spent some believe he's like this preacher who discovered it's insane and so We bring up the Boston. An image x is the first star fired. I had to fire him after the first show why he showed up all fuckedup You know I got him some blow and he went on stage at the gates. Yes,

do in like new material yeah and I said SAM is or any way you could do your h b o he goes down. That's bad dot, that's by dot and I go well. I got to let you go. I think that the. If then I got him a gig. The connection then he got fired from there. Then you had him a place in Mauldin. He got five, then he shows up at stitches at my gate and it comes walking in Assam, and yet I can't lose this game. This is my. This is my big money. They trust me, dear trust. The base did just the base. Bring me I'd, say: let's salmon, HBO Saturday night LIVE is one live the best I've ever seen, SAM Cassell, he comes stumbling out. What half of parliament way it down person says someone's fucking. Tonight and from then on. He just he found out the room down. By the end of the night they had hired him to come back to do the back room at the Paradise one is often run it, but

like us is like eighty. Six yeah yeah yeah yeah right after us, you know it. So what we're in New York and with caroline- and I mean everybody- was everybody- comes out to see the show with somebody and they're going to do. Rolling stone is on the cover on stone and he's supposed to do today show so he he flies in every girl. That's ever broke No problem and put them all up in the same hotel, different force. I got for my god- changes if you miss daddy crazy. So I told the story more than the small group people, but we're in the room and

I'm lying undecided. Bed brothers bill his mom's day at SAM's, passed out the chair. We were gone for days and this seems mothers letting you gotta get SAM up he's. Gotta do today Show- and I got the today- show that's huge man. We can pull this up and he was just at the point where he didn't care anymore lab. I thought so I said SAM said: get up, get up, you gotta, do it you, mother, once you do it. This is bigger, it's great for your career and we turn on the tv and he's putting on his fucking. Money is put on it. And this challenge it takes off and we also we watch explodes because I well there's high fuqing. Well, there's not everyone packed up and his mother just got holding an informant list we won't be using stamp I will- I will do it today- show you know, because it was a horrible thing to have

lose all the sessions, but you know I guess she was a teacher, I forget her name and the kids were in the classroom and don't watch any. Oh anyone want some cookies right at that. I mean yeah, but he was. He was fearless fearless, yeah he was for! You know. I don't know if you know the story about him, but his brother bill wrote that book brother, SAM yeah and he talked about a SAM got hit by a car. When I was a little kid, he was a normal kid and he gets this horrible head injury and then, All of a sudden was fearless like that happened Roseanne and that happened to him same exact story hit by a car One personality changes. One hundred percent becomes a totally different personality.

Becomes. Is wild reckless person having both of 'em listen. You know always LISA documentaries about him and stuff, and I see people that were on the periphery edges. I mean I was with him for a few years I mean the brain of the bus with one to Boston when he was a make. A lot of money might pay him any they loved it and it and we became real good friends and it was a. It was just a time like that. I never saw anything like that. You know what he break into preach thing, which is a feat yeah, and so one night were up. He said a canceling missing case. Any Misty University of Arizona and is his manager goes and he had a big time mansion and they just got him in the cover roast on Alyssa editors. Money you've got to get him to the show tomorrow. If you're open from us, okay, so Sampras come out, we'll go back to

play some we're doing massive month, blanch it and got to go to bathroom. Now, he's never gets up to go to bathroom, just smashed up when Tampa and we're doing show is the year that Tampa lost every game, that professional football team and they came in some big offensive, lineman biggest guys over. So he can. We meet Sammy got SAM. These guys want to meet you and one of them breaks. It'll it'll blow examples blows away: Oh it takes out a bag. Put it down not doing a rush. You put reason walks out and they're. Looking at my yeah he's, not human, so we go back to his place and now it's freedom on its forward them on. It was supposed to take a seven hundred o'clock flight and it's not going to make that

is eight hundred o'clock flight. It's only an hour out of Eleta Arizona there right so so one thousand o'clock the manager shows up- and we go say meant. This is not good, but this is a make up. Show you it in shelf. Listen makeup showed it sold out. He goes take language in and I'll be I'll, follow one so we're in the plane in his sister. How much time you got the nice. Well, how much you need yours will you know until he gets here, so I go on it. Must do twenty I'm at about fifty four and I'm going mad, I'm running and I'm holding him off. It's absent behold the mall and I look over and he's on it oxygen tank with is the Big Cody premium dead, dead, lived, a dead lamp ring on my bring him on, and the place goes crazy, crazy, crazy, crazy. Afterwards we go to some Strip club.

So we're in it. Everyone is wild man, he's a big star, mean people can't blue so sitting. All the strippers come over and he's strong money around him and someone throws a can of beer and that's it. He goes. You guys want to make more money in the night, then you're making him come with me and we got about eight of them come and we get a limo and we go back to the hotel are up to tell between lines are triggering and he goes because I know you're married, he goes, but in about five minutes things are going to change. You might want to go. He says, because once you open the store, you'll never be able to close it again, and I thought my alright brother, ok, so I left and I went back to my room- get back an extra cookie from the Doubletree in my room so the next morning I get up and I go over to the room

I opened it up and it fucking destroyed in his blood. Everyone should know, I'm crying crying we're ship, it was horrible and where should I don't know, fuck this? Like I get a cab, I go to the airport and I fly back and did his day. I never know what happened. It was one guy magic if you ever listened his magic fine, because I want to know what, but it looked like it looks like a bomb went off. Ship was broken Sholom I mean like I trashed place, but like dangerously trashed, it and blood and still still Paul, left and- and always I I don't know what happened that night, Mark Merrin was hanging out with him back in the day when Mark was a doorman at the comic strip about and he's a young kid yeah, he did so much coke with can isn't that he heard voices for a year. His head was by

He heard voices in his head for a fucking year and that's when he sobered up. He came to Boston right after that. That's what I meant yeah. I meant Marin and eighty eight when he had just just, was trying to get his brain I'm back online yeah. It was Friday cooked his brain, which is up for days. If people could rounded side shot, work well in Boston and we I think we do stitches and we close, I should come out we'll go over to Lance down street if his body mass is run and that so now we're drinking bottles of champagne like it's gonna go to that's met with that set up. We gotta go so with a rich and was where we going now. I don't know manage this. There's no bus open it's after two years. You got no place to go most boys. I know that that the folded up they've been shut down because wait a minute, hey guys, the limo. We had it and it had yeah call of them all. So they call a limit. What comes fully. She would like us to have a right to register bye, bye, bye,

Brea breath that shadow should happen. Then you know it was just. It was insane just not human. He's a wild motherfucka, not sure he changed comedy. He really did he change, but comedy was. It became something like before the ham it. Was people telling jokes he was so outrageous and when he did that HBO special that one that he did from the Roxy on sunset, obviously yeah that fucking special changed common. Like

change people's ideas like when he did that joke about the homosexual necrophiliac stage, wait never mind, I'm just I'm just a one night I go in and the cops the cops left SAM and it was like about seven squad, guys up front of comedy stuff going up. Sam and they're all lined toward the steps in while they watch him and he's bombing. You know I mean yeah people don't seem to like me. I don't want you to be favored by you know when you go home tonight, but I want you to take a piece of paper napkins, something anything ever. I want you right on it. Someone in your life. That's a brother or sister among the sacred dead. I want you take that home and I want you to get home and I want you to wipe your fuckass with chance, not a flight which I don't know, but so far and everywhere he went, he would leave like twenty or thirty tickets from the cops in that town.

However, we work, yeah, yeah, yeah, no cops would always show up. Although that's awesome. I said one night group at MIT Cs and he's up there jamming with ever Clapton Phil Collins. I forget who the other guy was an errand boy and he's got the guitar Jan rocking it out right. I can't play, but I'm going this insane and so the cops come and go slightly, take care of it. So I go up and he's like three four cars, the lights gonna go without you say: hey. If you had to cut it out, so many young believe it Eric Clapton sign in with Phil Collins and did Jamoat salmon exam. Can we meet outside without ago sample? the cops. It's ok, but you gotta come up and take a picture with them and you should SAM. I see that are closing it down, so it goes up and then pull the right. That's when they had the Polaroid cameras and they took full add me taking a polarizer salmon, the cops with whatever they want to see those pictures, but it was you never know who is going to come over there. You never know it was going to come over. There was just

he's the example that I always give to comics of a guy who was at one point in time, one of the best ever oh yeah, but then dropped off hard like he dropped off in a The way to stop writing too much partying his brother talked about in the book. He just it's. What can happen like can't you gotta respect this fucking thing and he was just all about the ride and then also he became very, very famous, probably two famous right. You know. Well, we would only outlaws of comedy don't settle long ago that the man out and hit driven out with Tamayo to my Suki and I got a call early in the month. Let me let me come quicksand that one. So I go over to Caesars Palace that Abby and I can't wait to get my tech. Take champagne thing taken up, pour water on

and smile push me out away and said she is welcome to Japan. Mister bond with ever say that you never said that. Every morning Tamayo Tamayo, I mean she was so funny man. I really enjoyed her as she was sweet. I worked with her used to work with the store. A lot I don't know she is she still doing comedy. I don't know I haven't seen ever thought she was up. She didn't She came up. You know in your country, you say I work miles to school in the snow. In my country, you drop atomic

Belmont crazy ship yeah funny funny funny stuff man, but he was up first time ever did ecstasy was they were close and the club that he started at in Austin TX. I guess we're all going wrong. Laptop yeah we're all going so he drove, I think, drive flew down. I thought it made him an someone comes in and says: hey you gotta try. This is what is ecstasy yeah man give me all you got how much I liked it, but give me all you got so we got were all actually. I never did next month and was sitting on a couch with and he starts to float away right, so I mean there's a hot, so I reach over and I bring up. That is what the fuck you quit touching salmon. I want to show a simple thank you. From crazy Jesus Christ.

Yeah. I was in NAM my shitty apartment in New Rochelle New York, now listen to MTV News and they told me the the you know on the television they told us that he died all right. I they call I should. Let me SAM said. I said: have you seen the body because I couldn't believe it kill him? nineteen year old, drunk driver, you know, I I seen so much that so much, but it might just. I didn't think he was capable of dying when he still went back to school. It's just come out and we're going to set and he's going to see Rodney's in the room because a Ronnie I don't know, what's up kids, you want to be in the picture and I said: well, listen Ronnie. I said I appreciate, but would you put my wife into pictures step? You put your broaden the pictures that we always have it on the road with SAM for last month years. No problem pictures in the picture, so we put my first wife in back to school scared, nice, prominent role in there. Why yeah, yeah, crazy, goddamnit

in fact, did you come out all that so healthy? Like you look great, thank you. Thank you really do you got my dreams him out there, but that's fantastic, but you know it's funny 'cause I listen to you about. You know you work, I think the hanging thing we can just hang. You know people don't pull up some stuff. Just hang it's great for your shoulder. It's great, it's great for everything about thirty seconds get to a minute and stuff like that and when I yeah I did. I forget, I was on a tv show and I saw myself and it was three hundred eighty eight pounds. Fifty six inch waist and I'd always been. You know me what about when I first thought it was then Kid and I just I I was the only guy I know, did coke and add and add an eating disorder. I would, I would do a lot and have a stake. I just am sort of what it was it it Coke affected me really different. So I it I had a at the heart problems and all that stuff I get I get. I said to get better and then I I once I get so biased attorney, even more food like a bigger and bigger, and- and I want that

I'm going stop and then I started I what that weight, watchers and I lost like one hundred pounds with them, and I thought it was going to be this women and they ended up giving the job to Charles Barkley, and then he was talking about fat purchase San Antonio for this. This is why I love Josh partly, but I was the guy I mean and he put the wet. I lost one hundred with them and I was so did an adult critical, but I'm definitely 'cause. I did Oprah, I mean I didn't cry. Did her show and I thought that she would like me and put that ever happened, so I started working out of my own. I started riding a bike and I started swimming and I started sad lifting weights 'cause I never lifted in high school. I was always rail thing. I was like I'm at seventy eight pounds, high school, and then I start to get into a committed to one set ups and absent, crunches and and and what the Bible. What, when I met you on that-

movie of becomes the boom. You see what happened yeah and I just in it and the lifting it was for my brain. You know I mean I I go to the gym and it was good in my head, you Know- and I really like 'cause- I mean I wasn't doing it to look. I was doing it to save my life and then like how I look. I started working at it and it's part of my thing now and I you know I'm sixty five years old, kids in the gym, show me how old do I have eighty two You got a six pack medical, you can have it to just you know it. Might It's just amazing that went from wild party in constant just drugs. Booze and partying two hundred percent healthy yeah

lifting weights. Yeah run wouldn't be here if he hadn't stopped, but it's a hard trend. That's a hard turn! That's a big right angle. What what like? Well, the the kid the kid fell back I totally on the backrub kit is my spots. He he he's he's. He said, listen, let's you can get this together. You can change your life, you can you know the sky's the limit and and a he won't believe it got. Last week at work at home meet I went to one years ago. She need another one can't stay clean on yesterday, Charlotte they probably crazy hair clean on yesterday show about that so and he just he just was, he was all over me and I started to get spiritual, you know and did you ever slip? No no, no! No! No! I got dumped and I'm not and I'm not a preacher you. I don't, but I talk about it. You know I mean I'm talking about now because you asked me, but you know I don't judge anybody. You know if I'll drive you

so I'll drive. You know people say if you break out when you come to my house, but I was I was in Schey Man. I didn't mean to me. I didn't know, and now a lot of this stuff like like you were saying you know, punch twenty forty times strong. I got really whatever you do, miss any of it I was not, but you know I can't I can't go. I know how bad. I what's you know in a minute and that and I lost, I lost a lot. You know I mean I'm still working in all right and you know I mean it it's It's something I don't want to go back to. I did it. You know I mean I actually go to Playboy Mansion was a Playboy mansion all the time you know I was able to hide that would have had seven girlfriends. She came up there having a good time. Let me open minded knows my name. No, it's good did this woman was almost

I'll call and I went over to help you with coach at your license. Original miss means. Let me see my son was named money really. What are you doing with comedian? someone's coming later, you're not yes hi, Elena and may became best friends. She went home to his mom. This is a month yeah and she to come. Get me and I you know, joke horrible story. I hadn't we would get together twice a week. You know I mean I just which out it was only my camp and you know, but it was still a lot of my rock material. I go to a club and carries his again here. Are you material? This name money is my fucking son that even press you know she was fairly funny she Who is a comma? She was uh. Oh yeah, Joan Rivers, daughter movie, life. Sallie Mae and it was hard, but I had no idea her son would steal her act. Yeah yeah, yeah yeah, oh yeah. She was at eighty three she was raped.

By some crazy Mexican broke into a house, and I- and she goes- I may be true- We have small fat little Joe in this guys. Fucking me I'm going. You could leave that that should dick that's Oh you got it on. She said that he started beating me. I don't know you cock Sucka, you know you don't have enough of a cocky going to become an old woman and she would always all fucking big. I had a professor in the house, probably it was, it was horrible. You know I that this should happen. You know I remember SAM had or open up his special yeah yeah. We did that thing to raise money for a two. You know 'cause I mean yeah one of his specials. She she actually, she came out with him right, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah. Well I had this SAM. Because I had met her at at that. You know what she was and at the Playboy Mansion, the old woman and have loved it. She would be glad to announced an agent would sit down with you know. He then I'd I'd drive all over everywhere, yeah pretty

crazy yeah. When I mean I would have you seen that new tv show the marvelous, MRS Maizel, no everyone tells me to great chill it's a great fucking show. I mean it's not historically accurate, like the way they talk. It's like I'm doing kind of modern stand up, but they're doing stand up back in those days and the woman that didn't exist like. There was no woman, like MRS Meisel Historic, like it took a long time before I mean she was more. Audi, then Lenny Bruce was in the television show, but It shows you what it was like back when people are just getting arrested for saying things and it makes realize like Lenny Bruce that Fuckin' got paid.

Paid the price and we're all benefiting from him up more. You know when, when I first started there was one book. The last laugh that was all that was about. It was not in the movies now the end of documentaries. Anything and I wanted to know as much as I could about all the guys who came before me yeah, because I watch a member. I saw Alan King to stand on our tv. I want. Oh, my it was unbelievable. I said she fantastic that I saw him as an actor him and he's amazing and I get to work with red buttons. You know I mean he wasn't anybody really funny. You know, and I mean the people that that came before me. I know every single one of my study them anyway, and this was before

you too, but suffice. I just read whatever I could find on them and it was. I would tell these young kids come up. I go yeah. I look at the guys who came before you and that not interested at all. You know I I, when I saw a Gleason Gleason was what I wanted to be. I I just I Jackie Gleason was just amazing. You know, and I I I want to be like that guy, you know 'cause, he was incredible and it was people realize he was a stand up. You know I didn't obviously listen to stand, though. Yeah really night, two ton Tony Galento was given amshit and the boxer and Gleason heckled him and knock them out of Jesus yeah, oh yeah, it was, it was incredible. You know 'cause, I met at Connie. You know Jackie Gleason was obsessed with ufos. Do you know that but I kinda dig it to manage a story. This guy told it to me some guy was rock band dude. He told me the story and I don't know if it's true, but the story was

that Gleason was friends with Nixon and and said you want to see some schitt Nixon took him two or fifty one So I don't think it was area. Fifty one, I think, was hangar eighteen, which is a Wright, Patterson AIR Force Base, and I think it was out Columbus Ohio and they supposedly had some crashed UFO there and Gleason built a replica of it or had a replica of it built in his fucking backyard. York's New York, Wow Homestead air. Space outside of Miami. It says no, I'm not there yet beautiful. I gotta bulshit version of it. Pull up the the actual version where you getting this from just Google? It I mean it's a rumored story, so I don't know if it's yeah

that's how I got well. I got it from a guy in a band and might be Bullship, but he gave me some book on Ufos. He was telling me about this, and but the Jackie Gleason apparently was obsessed with ufos. Well, I believe this. This gotta be something out there. I don't wear it, I mean, that's it. No. I did a lot of Uso shows and I've been around the world and- and it was every time I've done. I was in after Costa. Turkey someplace in the commander base took me out for dinner. After an I got him drunk, I got pretty drunk, I was so, but I'm going to be back and I said: hey man, you guys. Let me ask you about area fifty one. He goes got stoned so because this conversation never happened and we left and I had to take a cab to find my way back to a new place. That no one knows about

right. So then were I mean I'm at the dunes this, how long ago that was an I'm with these guys who are in the air force, and they said we really like shell with fans, but I got him drunk. I say man, what about area fifty one and a Sigma Scott Goodnight and I walked away so now me and MIKE a golf in with these blue angels, and he goes you're going to ask Michael no second year, we golf with them again. I fell asleep. Tell me about every fifty one wow well, because I was flying the plane and I had there and they came out and a pretty much much to me took me into a building and they fixed my jet within thirty five minutes and then put me back of his. He would never hit and I want to oh my god- so I don't know what's out there yeah, but that was here's. The thing that was

an area where they were testing all sorts of military equipment. They were testing different new, like that's, where the b2 uh bomber yeah. They were testing that there and then, despite playing yeah, they were testing a lot of ships. So there was a lot of top secret stuff. There right didn't necessarily have to be aliens. I understand and I'm hoping that the risk but I will try to find out- but I'd love to go with him at all manner, but you can't even drive if you drive up there Joe, but it's time you get your camera out there on you get outta here will lock you up. You know it's not good, so they don't even go there anymore they've moved to a new area they've, actually because it's so heavily scrutinized and because of Google Earth and all sorts of different ways. You can see things they've actually moved

well, I read I read everything I could find about that too, and I think I think I read the book area fifty one cup two years ago and basically at the end of book it was like Hitler had these. You know his guys experimented with the Jews and cut put the rounds on different ways and had a had an aircraft that was look like a spacious and it crashed and he's people came out with a crazy items of the rally and that that was in the book you know so I can shut to. Yeah. I know that Hitler did experiment with some sort of disk type air vehicle yeah they did, but I don't know if they ever got it off the ground. What the deal was, but the most interesting stories: the story of Robert Lazar Bob Lazar, who is a guy who worked at area fifty one he got fired because his wife it was cheating on him and they were recording all of his phone calls typing all these conversations and they found out that his wife was cheating. They thought that he was going to be emotionally unstable, and so

Tell him why they just released him. So then he brings friends to watch these. What he said was were alien crafts that they were experiment and with, and they were flying. These things around that had some super advanced propulsion system that they were asking him to help back engineer and brought friends. Do that, then they got arrested for doing that and when he did that, then he started talking about it. So he's been discredited by a bunch people, but I don't know who's telling the truth. He says that they wiped his college records so that no one but people said they went to school with them and he definitely did work for the government. But under what capacity? Who knows, but his story is fascinating and you know I want it to be true here it you want it to be true. They used to fly the team of people that worked at area. Fifty one from Burbank yeah every day,

I am it they work then flying back, it's like they didn't stay over. There was at one airport outside of Vegas. It was right outside like there were, the Riviera was yeah, you could actually look out and see the airport and and they would fly them. From the unmarked jets yeah. I wanted to be sure, of course, yeah you want it to be true. We flew up. We we did Quantana Mobay wow. Yes to end up there, yeah yeah. What is that yeah? It was. It was amazing. I would Colin Quinn Greg, although who's a little kid on billions of MIKE for Big Gaffigan gap, some I don't know we flew in at like a CIA plane, oh yeah and we did show Jesus Christ yeah. It was pretty pretty amazing and I tailored my show to the Marines that were that he's a young guy during the week this, but like really lifted the morale of him,

This is what you want to do. I want to go over and talk torture process. You know not actually touch scream at them. Just like. Oh, we can't have that you know did, but anyway, we do. The show and believe in, like three days later and I get to the airport, I'm first one down. I see this little eight seater plane and I go to spanish speaking guys, Compania, nobody, nobody right. So I go into the gift shop and I buy a giant like water thing, so I can pass in it and the guys who wants bears so I'm hoping. So I don't have money, that's great! That's great yeah! We gotta plan and we fly. It only took us like an hour to fly in. This was a four hour flight in eight two inch and eight cedar over water.

Way at about fifteen minutes ago, hey where's, the bathroom. You know banya watt. By the time we hit Miami that these guys were person at the top of the stairs. It was so funny yeah, I wasn't favorite then, but it was a it was Guantanamo Bay was amazing, that's going to be very weird. It does not play what year was Oh sure, this post, nine hundred and eleven obviously yeah yeah, because I've said to them I said well, can we ride horses and there's no more horses? They had horseback ride. There beautiful beaches for our troops. That would, and I could see, sailfish breaking and I said: can we go fishing? You know I've never caught it. Now we can't

go out and it will give you a ride in a gunboat I wanted to come, but they really think it's in my wife bought faster you'll, be honest with you. It was a nice, but my wife bought champs. So then the golf he had to carry your mat and hit off the mat. It's all been run into disrepair, but it's still beautiful and because I did tv and movies I was like a gs. Thirteen and I got the best apartment overlooking the bay and that Bay is so big. You can fit an entire battle. With the but the battleship, and it's in that destroys everything goes with it right and debate on the was it was like a robot. I mean it, the tanks are gone, and so they should. You want to go right to the fence. I see yeah yeah, so we get up in the tower and I see to it that, but not because I see this cuban gag

So I give the family no no watch. The clock is not an international incident at the guys comes out of guys. I've got sorry soda made it difficult. So I said why are you so nervous? He goes this millions of Cubans here they could overrun us and I got really and then we have no. We have a skill now that if they wanted to, we could call, twenty minutes, so they said their commanders If you really want to be with you, I should like to go in Havana and buy some cigars. Take the cheater guys some bits come in my office. We go in and is a map. He goes see this. This way you are, he goes that's where Havana, Cuba is the biggest island in the Caribbean. I had no at seven hundred and thirty six miles from Havana. He said you were closer and when you went in Miami well, God yeah. I didn't know that you know, but but the guys were great, it was. It was a great show they put it on tv. Like I forget, what's my man youtube someplace sucks

would let you go fishing all because I want I want to ride a horse. I wanted to write the tankers. You see all the tank tracks, money of an amount- and you know in a taken the the prisoners and a taken from camp x ray to Camp Delta, because Camp x Ray was basically like dog cages and CNN came that look out with trading is bit by me of that they will look to the fact that they blew up the World Trade Center, but you know so now they're in they haven't that better quarters than some of the Marines had a cat. They had the supposedly and still do have a lot of innocent people in there

a lot of people that they just scooped up in the wide net of looking to find people that were complicit in the real work with ISIS or Al Queda. Wasn't I mean I was? I was never to grab them, but you know, but there are some bad guys has to yeah it's real bad system when, when Obama released the five guys to for that one guy, yeah yeah, no dessert, there's yeah, there's a one of my buddies in CS is on and put three of those guys in it and that the bad guys it should be let out and who knows, yeah it's gonna, be strange to be in that doesn't mean that is like one of the most famous prisons in the world and you don't stand up there.

It was unbelievable, which I I I really liked it. Castro has never cashed a check. It's five thousand a year. We pay him five thousand here for that. The Guantanamo Bay and he never cashed a check because she figured if it'd cash it. We could get the support he could get out of the deal, but that was the deal made like what and fit in jail. It was so it was so beautiful like they used to have you know fire pits and and because the beautiful thanks to shade the families,

and the beaches are pristine, but it let it go to hell yeah. So strange, yeah, Lenny Clarke have lived a fucking amazing life. Now I write a book as soon as a few more people died. Thank you. Brother. Hey, jumped extra happiness for being my pleasure thanks MIKE base. Then, thanks for taking care of me when I was up and coming now, you're the best I paid a lot of my bills because of you, my friend. Thank you shared. Alright, everybody. That's it goodnight! Thank you, everyone for tuning into the program and how fucking funny is Lenny Clarke Right, told you. Thank you to our sponsors. Thank you to Zipper you, could try Ziprecruiter for free at this exclusive web, address, ziprecruiter dot com cash Rogan that zip recruiter. Dot com, slash, r, zip recruiter dot com? Rogan, zip recruiter?

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