« The Joe Rogan Experience

#1362 - Lenny Clarke

2019-10-07 | 🔗
Lenny Clarke is a legendary Boston comic and actor.
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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legend in the stand up, comedy world of Boston and just one of the greatest and most funniest guys I've ever met in my life is not a word. Most funniest is definitely not just said. He's fucking awesome, give it up for Lenny Clarke. Rogan experience trying my day Joe Rogan podcast by night all day, engine Lenny Clarke, that's right! How are you brother, Joe? I gotta tell you. Let me stop by say. Thank you, my friend, I can't believe the amount of people that stop me since I did you pocket you, you ask me a couple years ago I podcast was so I did that The moment I left here I went down to Venice Beach. Guys were watching the park as in their car. I came out everywhere. I go for captains of industry, almost guided harvest, Cragers Lenny Clock.
I saw in Logan Park as you are awesome and appoint homeless. Guys are phones that almost gotta go. How did you say it was? I shouldn't sit on Youtube, so you know the progress of tech, now, the homeless guys have phones and all that you do not shot until maybe she was trying to rush me at the studio the other day as wow. You know, I'm I'm not going to mention. I wrote you, oh my god, he will shoot. You talked about MIA Rogan, everyone! All that was all excited to set sail hello, hello, he's already in the morning in Boston. Ever since, back in the day I was delivering newspapers, Mattingly one was on the radio to listen to on the radio. When I was on my paper out him and child. Could there at all the the mattress, more demanding actress, yeah and then my parental who, who mark pass away yeah. She did not want to see him a week before he was at the mass general I want to donate. You know I am laughing and then I see the do. You have the eighty s and
so I shall kiss you goodbye. You won't kiss me a page, I said. Well, I love you man, but I'm not able to trip with you. He was so he did the five after five funny blue, comedy I mean every time. I owe him a lot all I owe to my he was a great great guy and they also have the comedy right. Wbz comedy right. Exactly all right use, yeah, yeah, yeah of the you know the radio this this style is the This is MIKE. Tyson was twenty years ago. That's a big it is, I made, I mean really people from all walks of life. What especially gets mad the millennials- I don't even know what they are, but they look the show man what comes after the millennials. What's the new to wide I'm just glad we got up at generation. Xi didn't like that. What do you? I don't know, I'm on baby boomer? Is your baby mama baby born in the mail totally sixty six after I switch from the great well, not bad, for sixty six fucking grill taxi, mostly on the coke and both he did his fucking, I'm actually even ticket. I think I'm going to
right, the body to science, just so, they could save the others going to run some tests on one thought: I'd make it. No one thought I'd make it past twenty, your era was such a great era of stand up talked about that so many times, but you guys in the fuckin really before I came along 'cause, I came along and eighty eight and you guys before I came along. You were party and the hard you know Joe, it was like you could do it we want to. We started comedy in Boston, so there were no rules and if there any rules, we break the rules and we made up our own rules. It that's why today you see how it is today I really enjoy working theaters, but the clubs you know the other day. This person had come. I hate people say you circle back with. You know why? 'cause I hate them. I don't want to deal with them. I wanted to show create I want to make it, but they throw you getting gone and they break him, and you say shit that you owe and they
that crying, but why? If I fucking would be I'm not trying to do a shelf, yeah yeah approach, I'm starting to know, please add a guy. I didn't think for Dana Farber the other night raised more money. Then they have it at race. It was great I was in awe thanks, Gina Farmer, Dana Faba, it's cancer cancer research. You know it's like the Jimmy Fund and stuff like that. So they asked me that I sent you I thought so it was nice with big event. The management already had to fantastic liberty, and this guy comes out because you know everyone likes you, but I hate you I want to rip your face after I go ahead, it's nice to meet you too right. So he grabbed my water. I go, you can have and I walk away to take a picture. So I come back it is you want? You can have it? You know. I don't know why people like you, but I hate you and I will never
your face after I said we had this conversation. So now people have a hey Lenny. Can we talk, get the fuck away from city screaming at people? Guess you? You attacked my father on stage twenty years ago on a Thursday night at granite, like some gone a pal. I don't remember what I did last Thursday say idea. Father he's dying to him and I had nothing to do it. I've been Hella guy was inside. They eventually had him. Escorted out by security was really wild, but I mean he's yeah. I love you know I mean long. Will it shows your hecklers make week, babies, oh man, yeah! Well, you know we make dumb kids, don't don't fuck with somebody. If you're not, I mean habit, don't forty two years a married but two or three times it is a lot of shit up covered you're, not going to know you're not going to surprise that Solarius take on it. You can have that water they got grab. I've never had security in my life, you know because I'm Amanda Beep. I still take that ages for shits and giggles, but I mean you know wow
crazy, yeah! Well, 'cause, I'm ticket punch his throat and I'll just drop to his knees and normal even know what happened I'll say We need a medic in again and then I was coming whispers. He wanted to meet me outside ten minutes. I'm going. I can't do that man. I was all dressed nice and, if you're going to punch someone to throw the problem, sometimes you Nick the Chin the real way to do it is this. This with your hand, just slam that fucking thing into through right there. That's how you do it if you punch someone in the throat first first You could say I pushed him away from me right right. I that up now someone's going to who so, but that's how you, if you want to hit someone in the throat and you don't want to really hurt him. You want to get him the away from you. Just use your open hand. Like that your open hand just like that. It's amazing how much force you can generate with your hair. Like that, just slamming it, you don't have to wind up its knowledge.
Does this is this is a question that all right, then the tender area. It's very Well, that's! What's going through my mind this guy screaming at me right I could. I couldn't believe it. I said to chase you honey. It's unfortunate but this there's always going to be fucking. People that are unhinged he's always going to be people that can hang, but Well, it's a really amazing learning is the mount of shows that we do how many people keep it together. Yes like, show. Ladies and gentlemen, Lenny Clara, it's all live it's happening. You know. I said that the international. This is not some program thing I'd. I know where I'm going right. You treat me good I'll, treat you better. You fuck with me I'll, follow you home a burning house that I mean I just want to make. You laugh somebody if I have no hidden agenda about the bells. You know I mean 'cause to do stand up now is so much different than before, because they were can't say words like
and but no it's not me not me. I can't no you're, looking at all the white men couple more years down the road I'll be able to say whatever I want. He says. Elderly right, I started typically there's some kids beat up this sixty three old guy and is a big like federal cases. ' 'cause he's elderly uncle Bob Sixty six, you know, and I'm I'm not going down like that guy. You know this kids gonna be surprised how to go. Look! I'm elderly! You know that's a pretty chases Christ yeah! I just hope Joe. I really do that. This is all a cycle. Yes, yeah Circleville yeah well well. Either way it works. You know where I'm going, but I'm like this is think about. Do you think it will come back and he's coming around already yeah? I do yeah. I think people are tired or political correctness, and they also realize that there's good aspects to political correctness, right, it's good to be kind to people.
It's good to be. Nice is now good to shit on the down trying to nudge down on people that have rich Eisen, rather I'd rather I'd rather heavy is a friend that I really want because a lot of times you forget let your enemies. You had a party going to oh shit. I forgot I fucking hate, you love you mad at avenue. U sure I'd rather I'd rather people said well, you don't worry what people think we will people think is usually what you are you're addicted. People can take you with text. Now I gotta be a nice guy. I've gotten way way better, just letting shit go. I don't care, I mean the holding grudges and want to get back at someone. That's nonsense! It's for fools! There's people that they fucking. The grind on it all day, like they'll hate someone and they what they just want to talk about that person all fucking day and they're. All it's always a waste of time. It's waste time doesn't do you any good now, just let it go, let it go as as you get older you get a few years until I'm I'm.
I think that, because someone told me hold a grudge is like drinking poor and what the other person to die. Yeah, yeah yeah. I don't have time for that. Get other problems, I'm telling you that quotas for jealousy, but they bought. It applies with both things. It plausible things. It's foolish, it's like look. I want people to If you and me have a dispute, I'd like you to get over it, I'd like to get over to I'm not into like having enemies for life, those even the one enemies for like general, what a real enemy is. I know you don't know what a real enemy is. You just you're, you're you're you're paper tiger you making you're just talking. This is nonsense like real, means they want to kill you you don't want to kill me. I don't want to kill you. So, let's just stop yeah, it's a pushdown sense, that's a push. Let it go! It's most most disputes. Look we're all different at different points. In the day at different times in our life, you catch me and I just gotten,
some sort of a fucking dispute with somebody and then I'm in my car I'm going to behave very differently. Then, if I just got a hug from my kids and then I get my car? You know I mean yes, everybody's different at different points of what you might you might just got fired. I might just come out so much in your car yeah having a bad day on a bed, and I usually am more than willing to give people the benefit that shy. People are often miss under Just do it, and I've learned that I learn that thirty years ago. If so, shy, it's not that they they just shy. Free to be from now give them the benefit of doubt, you know: don't it's much. It's good that they're, afraid to say hello, yeah, yeah yeah, it's so you know people deal with all kinds of different social issues,
you know a lot of people that hold grudges and there are angry. What they're really doing is they're distracting themselves from their own failures. You know, that's really what they're doing instead of this is. I said that I said this one of the last podcast, but I'll repeat it, because it's very important. The way I look at life is, I have bandwidth. I have like a hunts. Let's say I got one hundred points. I don't have any points for anybody. I don't care about. I don't have any time for that. I don't have time for things that I care people care about the people that I love. That's what I have time for and those other things. If I have to deal with them, I deal with them and then, as soon as I can get him out of my head, I'm gone. I have one hundred points of bandwidth and that those one hundred points I'd like to use one one hundred of am on things that I love and things that I care about, and that's it positive and so you get by life, and that's how you become successful, because if you spend your time you know thirty kind of your time wondering in pondering shit. You don't like that in less you're making comedy out of it. That is going to fail. You it's
and it cost you because you're seventy percent. Now you only have seventy percent for the good stuff. It's not good He is good as one hundred percent you're not going to do is good with your comedy. You're not going to do is good. Whatever the fuck you do. If your sculptor painter making music, you know a certain amount of art requires a certain amount. I think some art requires a certain amount of angst and uncomfortable feeling and just something that allows you to dig deep into your motions and creates thing and sometimes out of anger and hate. You can get some fucking to me. Thank my best offense. Yes, but she got a treat it like that, like I, don't don't bring it home with you, I don't carry around a bit like a bad show. When I first got it, I I'd be upset for now. It's like you know about it, I'm at the cogo. I love this song others may have no fucking. That's my number one problem. Really, if I up on state, even if I up one bit and get a standing ovation that one bit will haunt me,
I will go home by myself sitting in front of the tv and just go fuck she's, fucking shit and then I'll just right. Now again a practice it again. I'm you know, love well Bob. How long will you stick with a bit that to you it's very funny, but it's not working for the crime? That's a pro! I am a bit and I was doing for a while about the second coming project. The second coming project was a group of people back in the day when Jenette x when they first started the you know, applying genetic research and and and there what what they were gonna do. Is these people wanted to take samples of tissue from what they told the shroud of Turin. Dealing with the shroud of Turin came up your face of Jesus. I thought it came off the face of Jesus. They found out later through carbon testing. Then it was really only a couple one hundred years old, but when these people be,
for the most racist, come off the demonstrated space not really strategy. Now I didn't notice how to turn his failure. Google, that Google, the shroud of Turin, they did a test on it. I think I think it turned out to just only be a few one hundred years old anyway. What they were going to try to do is they were going to try to take dna from that and then clone Jesus and so the bit. I had was that you know with Dolly the sheep right: they they tried to clone Dolly the sheep, a bunch at like it was liked as simple as the first time they did it. It worked out, I'm like what, if they phone Jesus and he comes back with some birth defects like what do they do, they kill him and start from scratch. Did they do it again like what, if Jesus like what if they clone Jesus beyond down syndrome, so I had this whole bit about Jesus with down syndrome and then instead of across yet hockey helmet and then like like, but the power like he would turn dog shit in the cookies. Like you
like instead of turning water into wine into, it was a terrible bit, but I thought it was so. At outlook. At the time I like to do this before you hung in there with for a few months, I heard you were a few I'm just trying to figure out a way. I'm done like three trick shots. I tried three shots yet when you would friends funny yeah people hang out with your setting on my Did she use anger, not doesn't work sometime, he just got a letter to go and put it aside and come back to it later and then come back to a fresh eyes. Yeah sometimes, but you know Chris Rock. You know that bit that he had for years. He had this bit. There's black. Then there's the n word that bid. He said he bombed with that bid for like a fucking year. He couldn't get it to work right. You won't get mad at him. He would and then it be name one of the greatest bits of all time because he stuck with it and you figured it out and he worked at it, but you know he's a crap.
Smith, yeah yeah he's a guy that is it is it go over, is material and it will run it by other comic right and and what the work on it. I mean that's one of the greatest bits of all time and it it he's still look through it because he just knew there was something there right. I mean there's those two. It's like it's hard it's hard to. I knew that the second coming project was now to be one of those, though it was just too fucked up. It was just too fucked up, but I remember I did at one time at the comedy store and some lady goes next subject. Oh my God all God, fuck you screaming at me. I hate you. She was screaming at me next subject. I'll, never forget that lady and I started laughing when she said it, which was even worse yeah. I got an old lady story when we lived in the barracks there's fourteen comedians living in that place in Harvard Square, don't know if you ever came by 'cause, it was pretty hard to Paris. The barracks was an apartment that my
can I had and we use this God. It was the eighty seven in the big in You know when one stands party before my dad came in and eighty eight. So if I like you're saying my cloud yeah yeah right, so we had this house and it was like three or four bedrooms and Kenny Rogerson's room, which was like a closet. What is she willful. We refer to it. Just the sperm room and Kenny the rent was one hundred and sixty five doll. Month? The language name was wing one and we were working at the Ding HO for Should Lee. So one hundred and sixty five bucks between sometimes then guys we did have it. You know we blow it all right. So now every comedian came in from out of town I have to go to hotel, you just go by the back. There was a key under the mat at the end, like eleven keys under the mat, but there was this old lady next door in the third floor apartment. We would rage all night, I would break windows, I
the sound of breaking glass. We had a guy on call you. It was a good phrase that let you call the window guy here. I just love to throw things Sweeney dot. A I bottle thrower known he's laying on the floor, and I go sweet what's wrong with you, I'm just having fun, but don't talk down to me. I know you're lying on the floor, get uphill. So now this woman, she told them, because I say I hate you. Let me like. I enjoy sunless, I'm going to the store. You want me to get you anything and she yelled at the top of letting clock. I only lived to see you dead. All the everything Joey gets worse. So now I said the flowers every now and then and she trauma off the balcony. I don't want your fucking fly, want you dead, so she answer getting murdered. Oh no!
capital yeah yeah, so sort of cops come to the House one day and I'm laying in my bed in a bucket and rogerson comes in and which is. Did you murder late, show us on the go now? Yes, okay, you can come in and come in know. We will do If you were gonna, ask you questions, we will you less at Eagle? I don't remember I go, but I but No! I get here later. They will admit that, but don't work out of that the day and then we hang out with after hours, and I don't know where was but then I get home, but you know that woman get. I don't think I ever saw the case, but it definitely wasn't because I was too lazy to watch change three flights of stairs. We have police cost park in her her park especially have a car, but we have the Patty wagon parked down below biento. Ball was crazy, said of the cops come over and party with yeah yeah yeah yeah. Most of them are good
thrown up in forty never solved. They never saw that case. As far as I know, there was a guy that is the train with who got arrested. I don't know if you remember this case, but they they they took this guy and they were breaking his bones with a hammer and then injecting with cocaine to keep awake 'cause. He was blacking out from the paint and they cut his hands off. They cut his head off cut everything off and this dude that I knew got arrested for it and when I asked him about it he knew something like it one of those things where, like you know, you ask someone like I go. They arrested you I go. Why would they arrest you. And it was like this- I don't know I don't know nothing. I was like. Oh, you know something holy shit. I was like. Oh my god, I might know a fucking, serious murder. Oh yeah yeah. He went to jail for something else. I forgot what he went to jail. I knew him when I was sixteen and he went to jail and then he came out
And when he came out like all his tattoos, he had scars all over. All of his tattoos, like apparently tried to burn his tattoos, often the joint, and he was like just a different person like this time in jail, and I guess he was in jail for, like maybe a five years from when I knew him. What came out five years later and Sir trained again before you got arrested, end dump chest super. Spooky to be around somebody that you think might have done that. I know a few murderous that yeah yeah I mean I didn't know at the time when I'm them, but only is about all my well, the the guy who got the the past Johnny Mandarano it on sixty minutes he shops at stop and shop in Somerville people. You know whatever Johnny, my learning, I let I want Hey John Twenty, a bit all house now deals. You deals need that time. He did a lot of time. Now we've got sixty or not or not. Twenty.
How do you kiss seems like you should be in jail for edible? How many did Jimmy Debolt killed and he was not the only without the other meth in Arizona. I think he still out yeah yeah he's out again before, but I don't either so one of my buddies in high school is in public, but he was the funniest funniest person. I ever met my life right out of that one day he stole twelve corvettes, twelve red corvettes and lined up outside and wanted corvette. There was a briefcase full of cash and he went in and he bought the entire lunchroom lunch now which is on me and I school right. Much zombie still corvette in itself can still come back, so you need line them up outside. He was amazing, so he goes to He goes to WAL boy, remember, wall posts, so we're doing to show it will pull a couple of guys after you come in yet so this mystical before you come in. We just wanted to know if there's any drugs or drug remnants on you, you're not going to be released, and I want oh, let me
change clothes. So I change my clothes and- and I did the show- and it was really that so do a test swap you yeah. That was that they just put it was if they've swab do when they found Coke on your shirt, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah and she's, and this is like thirty five year. As I right shell, and this was Montel was still maximum security. You know what I mean the yeah: what's the worst, so we go in and I'm with the J a couple of pages into. Has it things were you doing? I don't. I think that was a cancer thing at any beat that, but that still is but but a good guy, Oh my god remind me about DJ. I want to finish this stuff, so I'm on stage and I'm thinking him at bumpers in there right there any jumps up on stage and I go. Rodriguez high Adonias, I'm in Hamilton and assumed name, I'm going to Danny this thirty five years ago. He said warple under his suit. Name I mean I could that be anyway. He gets out and then he,
He murdered some guy and he goes double life and shit you just a little bit of a guy, but funny I mean it's tough guy. I'm going to kick his ass. He could make them laugh so hard. You couldn't punch him. He was that funny Now he said he's been in for I got. I want to visit him, but you know they said it's not a good idea, but I'm going to go for some amount of old now he's better. He spent over thirty years now, it's so funny how, if you're in the nightclub business like we are you're gonna run into people along the way that have done some horrible shit. Oh, I know guys Sada guys head off with a saw, but I think a sword. You know almost like with a summer ice storms and then throw it on the on the guys lawn. I mean yeah yeah it was it the
drugs involved. I remember I remember crack crack crack before crack was the freebase freebase watchers, This crack, that was for people with money. Does the Richard Pryor Day, okay, which is a prior result for yourselves the first time I'm I'm free base and at at like an MBTA station in South Boston, and I think consumers can somewhat there. Is this guy who's who's who's away for life now to look remain nameless, but up? I might take a hit passion out I mean I'm so higher passing on Alcatel said: what are we going to do with the body? That was the last thing whose body you know if you die, oh Jesus Christ, after overdose yeah, I thought it was smoking that stuff
the stop my own well. I went to when I finally went to the doctors and at the age of of fertilization all hot damage and that they should what what what did they it was maybe the weight you know 'cause. I was almost four hundred pounds in nigga. I got about company said you had to do an awful lot of coke. I said well, this is, more mountain Peru, that's missing you really that much. I go oh yeah, so yeah it was insane. Well then, also, if you get in coke, you gotta know people sell coke and add people who would bring go to me. You know my mother said: let it be very careful. Shovers is people going to try to give you drugs or not mad? I don't give him they sell to people then give me drugs. I got up dealership. Try Michael, not try my cock. My cock is better just to hang out to be in the shop. You know how old I was happy with rock stars and a lot of rock
as with us when people talk about the days the early days of Boston Comedy and it almost sounds fake because they used to Hey you with coke yeah, like I was offered money or coke right right. That's how they would yeah first, I got, I didn't, do do coke first time that happened to me. I was in Sarasota FL and they go Lenny. It's been a great week. You know we over three thousand. How about we give you three grand or announcer cock? Why don't? We do have half, and then that started my time travel and I had I had it up and shower so I love Sarasota. I wanted to be Jackie, the joke man and I ended up in Tampa but from Sarasota is hundreds and hammer the models. It's not close as you drive it. Evidently this is Jackie. How do you time travel Jackie
blow blow and driving around God? Chases you mentioned DJ and what happened to him? You know kiss dj. He was really good with the ladies. You know 'cause he plays the guitar, I mean he was sent uh still looking yeah yeah yeah yeah. I never promised broker captains chair over his head one night I had stop ago. You're gonna kill somebody broke who broke the capped. Rabbits Kravitz took Barry, Crimmins, Captain's, chair over head yeah. Why, I don't know you should have at least for final with the anger to each other. You know what no, that no, it was a fun day, will pitch and they would never. Close very was so intimidating. We had a what one night a fight broke out at a guy came at Barry with a knife, and I kicked the knife out of his hand Gavin's that would I thought that was very well done. You've decided to carry out the first farewell.
Alright, guy comes back through the door with another life type roll down at the street and just kick the shit on and gamma comes goes. There's like a big shaver, not one, but two pg any, never moved from his seat. Eleven move from the other day is moving to Florida yeah. I guess moving to Florida that we had a little time from, and I said to him I don how you doing it's usually a great. I go yeah yeah. Well, you know I'm I'm trying to get healthy dawn and how's your blood pressure goes. I don't know I should I take my blood pressure like three times a day. Now is how about you? Yes, you taken enough for both of us. Like I still goes. Hard also goes. All the way to my song. We had a drink, in his hand, was still going hard, glassy eyed. It's like that. Sorry, all funny, oh my god, so quick to give a fuck, doesn't cool teacher more degrees than
your momma. This guy he was. He was genius guy. Yes, he used to do blow in the barracks till around six hundred and thirty in the morning play cards and it always went to beat everybody, and he goes I gotta go. Well, I gotta go to teach school and he put on his jacket drive and now you won't believe how many people come into sugar is Kevin White. He was my teacher in high school at the other people. He was my father to this day. I think he's the greatest comic the people don't know about. Wow did out one. The greatest councils aren't bond. I remember seeing him at stitches thinkin. I should probably quit I think I should probably quit. I could never be as good as this guy. First I see him perform. I got manual great how long you been doing this. He goes. This is my first time but you're full of shit. I got some nice to meet you to walk away and we add- and I was very jealous- that a guy would just step up to and be
that good and then we would hang around together and hope that people would freak out like many I how good he was. Sometimes Could I I can't go on and he leave me and I am with an honest. If someone panicked, they would be at the back. Ready to go yeah. So gab ghost that's kind of fucked up and see if he cracks under the pressure? Well, he so smart? That's why Gavin was so good. He had so many things to talk about and his way of looking at things with so Intel. Because because any you so so did he just he legitimately didn't give a fuck so everything was casual, like all his best punch lines were casual, is a story that I've never ever told, and I know
that's gotta be hard by maybe twenty million people? I don't give a shit. We went to a shell. What one of his buddies was a bartender at the ninety nine and one of the guys who work there was sick. So they asked us to do a show from a benefit the race of money. So we did and he says geez. I wish I had money to pay in Garrigus who that credit card yes. Well, that's some lifting us will take that as payment. He goes so we got. We got banged up that night. He goes what's the hottest place right now, what's the hottest place in the paper 'cause, you have other Puerto Rico. Ninety eight years we're going to Puerto Rico. You catch us, tickets gets us plane tickets and we got a big bag of blow and we get we get Logan an would go blow all night yeah hold this, and so we land and gab coast. Where is the blower to go? I did it, you did it all. I go yeah. I don't want to get,
Was it going through customs? You slap Puerto Rico's America, you idiot, we check into a hotel. I was and I keep said I turned down. What's my name again so with that in for the weekend, it's humbling, as just don't draw attention to us, and now I'm off. Why don't draw attention? Why? Because we want a credit card, I'm throwing cheese into polio. That's right, Darm Trakt attention, so we go to dinner with the most famous restaurant down there and we get the chateaubriand. The two I will always want. I don't even know what it was, but they come out they cook at the table and I'm sure visual everybody, your property, one get mad dash, that'd be may right, GAB Gad said: don't draw any attention to I'll, be a cap that that I got Fifty dollars making supper general I should get. I want to get you this age.
From a dollar bottle wine? Yes, no! No! No! That's drawing attention! When do we get two three three hundred balls on while ago? I assessment right so anyway, and he puts up with me- he's loose Swingers bunch, gambling right and I money, I'm throwing my money away and tips, I'm a big dipper like without it. So, yes, I get pad knows what they shut off the credit card cycle watt. He goes yeah, there's no way for us to get back in ago. Ah, why don't you take what money you've got left and go down and try to win some and send me back to Boston. Then I wire money 'cause, you know go for the money back, that we need us Why should I send you when I go 'cause you like the sex, greatest comment have a livias who's, the first. Jim Rock Videos, chat, Rockford, he's not even a
a person. Rockford files he's not even a real person, so gab go stay here. So I barricade myself in the room. There was a big computer that made drinks with the career in the health and I think yeah yeah. Well, you could push buttons and it would make all different drink side like that. Empty right right had to push that against the door gap. Customer his Smith, I gotTa St tickets. I go yeah, I finally fell asleep 'cause. I was a nervous wreck, so we fly up and get with so he got money gambling in God of gambling, and I don't know how we did it. I didn't even ask, but it got us both back to the Boston nieces. Never going anywhere with you ever again, but the thing was second greatest comment awhile ago, so he's not even real any the rug, oh god, but that he was brilliant camels. What year was this or Cheese Adam E eighty, seven hundred and eighty eight God the good days
yeah that will go with the hottest place. We almost went to Venezuela, thank God, and what time of year was this? It was the fall. Start to get sucky yeah yeah yeah yeah was it wasn't snowing at right now. You know I used to think that it was bad that weather, but now I think it makes better people. I really do now we are really tough, yes, but I get the telephone resilient yeah, but I'm you know your. What your way from you don't look at me. Two years three years ago, we had like ten feet. Is that what three days yeah you know, people jumping out that the floor windows just to get out of the house yeah I want. I want to get away for. No, I get it. I don't want to live there. I don't want to live there, but I think growing up. There did me a lot of good, Well, you know what there's a lot of advantages to it does make you a tougher person more resilient and they have the best education. There I start this. I mean it's: an education in Boston is excellent. In the mathematical I mean anyone with money who gets sick.
But don't go to Burbank? Think they fly at the dmg, there's more colleges per capita in the Boston area than anywhere in the country. Absolutely the thing up! one of those I couldn't get into any of them when you're in the cold. There's something about this. A certain camaraderie that everybody shares when you're stuck yeah. I know it sucks. You help people help people it'll, still push out in elderly couples, casual and then you'll hang on the bumpers they drive over that shit. I've never done any of that around here around here and, like you, got a flat tire. You can fucking figure, it's warm out. All you can call somebody back. He still come quicker than your neighbor will truth, and I lived out here for years. I love is not in for twelve years yeah. Your story out here is one of the most horrific stories about what can happen if you get a Krooked agent and I've told, Many guys story! All you know we talk about murder, you are very lucky and why not, murdering your agent, I know where his kids went to school. I knew
I know where he was well. What happened? I think you might have talked about this before, but just so this podcast is a I became. I became like really big. Television show television aimed at the main shipping like what ninety three nine hundred ninety nine. It happened so long. I think they're going to Joe is. I can't find I mean I have Vhs, it someplace. You know, but you can go on Youtube and find Lenny's. You know those seventeen LE seventeen or eighteen Lenny's and a show is the highest rated show since all in the family. On C it was a great show. It was a great show, live an amazing cast and the guy who played my father, Eugene Roche, JE shop, everything I never acted and caught the perfect wave, the Roseanne, where TIM Allen, those guys are getting signed, calms- and you don't want to I I was my show yes, I first thought and Seinfeld didn't have a great. First year we had a
great for sure we were doing amazing and then the First Gulf WAR broke out and that that kill. Yeah- will not be seen tonight, so we can bring in the war in the Gulf and then let me back up. It was the the was sherry's, the land is a benefit or service, and then they changed me from from I've. I forget when it was on, but they brought me to find a Friday nights which is like yeah. That's that's the tv, and you know one of the the I I went from having everything you know I mean I am I may engine in the marina. You know a boy model, wife who happened to be a coke dealer. I mean, what you want. I will goal what could go wrong and then this guy they should. You need an agent and I I said once I felt and Leno's agent and the guy at the time was both both those guys were with him and he would be getting it's a you want Seinfeld Global, well, hi, this guy. You want let out hi this guy. Well, I was that guy in the
Richard Jeni, who he was a monster coming tomorrow. Stay was a monster and a beep that behind I have to open it. I don't. I don't need him to open for me. You have this new guys, never brought stage before yeah. I mean why work. If you know I have to I mean I work my ass off you. Jenny was one of the greatest of all time highs, another guy that people forgot about. I sing his praises on this podcast all friendly fire, and I got along with him. I I he was a nice guy. We are we, we always hit it off. You know it and he will, but he was a monster, comic manager. Somebody had catch. I I think, I'm funny at anything. I'm I'm insane and I've made my the breed and say that I got no problem with that because it will cause was fun, It was funny. You know it's funny, the new uh, the kid coming up. You better watch your back. All of the new Indian get because it's all everything's know what's up with an old guy. I don't you know I get all be funny. I just want to acknowledge that it doesn't matter how long We doing stand up these days. I know it to pay them
else you know what I I work, the giggles. You know I work at least once a MIKE. Could you can't walk away no Lucia, fast yellows and you lose your fat yeah. You well, you know, and I mean I do. I do a lot of charity work and I do that because of what made my parents happy and it's the right thing to do in a plus. I do a lot for general and they've kept me alive over the you know what I really feel. That's the truth. I do not do you, member Esau, comic club in Long island? Yes, Richard J, Was there one weekend they said he did for different hours. Shows Friday. Show Saturday said he never repeated a joke yeah and either we're all sitting around with me and Joey COLA and a couple of the comic strips looking at the tropical looking at the ground shaking her head going. What the fuck yeah like, how? How does he do it and it was all a stuff? You know it wasn't
I do two different hours in one night and shit, but I was so high. I did gab to pay its all new baby and enjoyed it yeah yeah, but it was all of a stuff, a defenceman. He was she was rocked by the way human Rock worked on a lot of Chris Rock's earlier specials. He worked with Richard Jeni. Nokia Richard Jeni would like they were tightened up its together at the polo did. Alot would rest Falka T Kissimmee his powers. Great job he's just fantastic joke later. He he gets into all the time. Just for writing great stuff, Well, you know what he's always not get him Nick is always not giving a now he's he's always had that affect the out of you. Yes, I always had that and it kills me yeah. I mean it's just what's out people I'm offended, you know what I'm offended that you're offended driveway
are you being offended fuck? You how's that you're happy with that. I remember when I first saw Nick at stitches. I've made me excited because he was this guy. Look like a football player, not handsome football player back either thick had a full jet black hair good. Look at good great looking guy, but it's funny as shit, so you don't have to be a nerd to be a comedian now, but I mean growing up in Boston. That was a really good thing to learn because you guys, like you who and Sweeney and Kevin Knox is big. Fucking men, big men, but for nerds, Pitbull sister wasn't imposing lines, look at old line. You fucking diagram, guys over six hundred and twenty six, not Kevin Knox, you know, but people he used to come in Then how open my and we put on like forty people and one night, someone brought in a big bag of blow an I say:
to add noxious, listen you're up next years. I can't he be into every week, would would a couple of broads he had his own table was like a condo table. His table and he just loved comedy- and I said: hey man erupt next goes. I've never done. I said just cover me for ten minutes, anyone up here and he never looked back and he and better the law hum flowing hair into tennis document. It was a fast instructor yeah. He had what's called like a little moment, yeah, but it got the name but there's, but it was even more than a monitor, was flows flow. Things like there was a fan on him at all times there was flowing and he was at first guy- that I knew. That was a comic that was like really in his health. It was uh log in for size and and taking vitamins and stuff. You know speaking the health. How are you doing? I'm great did. You have a shoulder up back thing that you know really gang of things. Yeah. I've always had something
because I beat the out of my body yeah. I remember when I was listen to want a podcast. You were talking about shoulder surgery and how you don't know what it would stem cells exactly now do a buddy of mine, this Navy seal. He set me up because I was having back problems ed drunk gave me some of that c, B, C b c et yeah. I saw some out on your file yeah yeah at that, because I did I just: did this movie had a fight scene, cause me up and he goes hey how you doing honey. I've gotta get what we said about having how's your back. I got back fine and I had just heard it. The night before driving in the car a three hour drive. It's just. I couldn't move. As I said, the clock, I need some of that stuff and it helped me early work that couldn't believe it hello? It's all about inflammation and c b d is fantastic at reducing inflammation. I take it every day every day, yeah I believe in it wholeheartedly. Now, when you say you take it, you take the pill drops drops, I haven't tried. I just tried the rub on stuff. You know
rub on subs great to hit. The drops are more effective way to do it. Those to do both you do the drops in the road. And stuff is not like. You get overdose on Cbd, it's not even psychoactive. It just reduces no one hundred shit cause. You fight. Do everything on. It would happen with anyone yell date on shaping this guy Jesus Chrysler, but the stem cell stuff, which I am all for is this me. She was tell me by banks in lending there's a place in Dallas. I guess they can inject you into your bloodstream and It goes through all the party, but yes, yeah exosomes, it's not just in Dallas. Do it here in Santa Monica Rial Lifespan, Medison shout out to doctor Ben Ruby, yeah I've had a doctor Ben Rui yeah, see that's why you got that Jim out there, which is amazing. I said to one of the guys I work fish. Is this Joe like there's? No chill buys everything
want to be beholden to not want to go yeah wow. I wish I could be like that. I'm all that happy, but I don't want. I know you know if you, if you have someone sponsor you right, you have to get their. Maybe it's not the best at what I buy that rogue equipment yeah. I I buy it. They don't give me a discount, it's the best. You can get all those cross figures on users can phenomenal. That's all we You got the right spaces shit out there, the new space age running thing. I tried the things Z as in zero yeah you're running, but you know what I like even better that IRAN in the one that you propel yourself you just saw treadmill, is sort of a strong, EL aerosol treadmill. Yeah. That's amazing! You put yourself yeah, you! Doesn't it it's not a motor. You know a regular treadmills at all. You press a button and you just keep up with the machine. This doesn't have machine this. Is you actually pulling it? So it's thirteen percent harder than regular, running well, yeah, but less
on the joints, yes, yes, the judges know pound. He gives then it's very gentle, because when I was fat, and that's the worst morbidly obese. My knee, I would still job 'cause I wanted to come down. I don't want to be fat. You only people go home, happy myself, that'll iety! Another wants to be four hundred pounds. He might be shit happier not exercising, then they are exercising because they just like doing it. So they say I'm happy being this way. But if you could give him a pill, hey say: hey I'll, give you a pill and all Jason Momoa. Okay I'll, take it all I'll. Take it take it. I took the last thirty pounds that I lost to get down to the two hundred pound Patel at actual LOS Angeles about would drops from this like New England fat loss and they would drop step. You know all all organic seven and recently took my dna and they may
check the foods that affect your body with the any inflammation and stuff. Like I'm going to man. I got because you know as well as I do. You can work out till the cows come home, but if you eat those guys come on bass that you've got it right. It's it's! Eighty percent eat right, it's yeah, twenty percent. What you eat twenty know your work. I work out for my head, you for my head right. It's keep the demons away, all fight those statements, most Dementyeva Mountain running yeah. I beat the shit out of the bag trying to kill the demons. Yes, yes, but you eat right too. Yes, yeah, God, too. Yes, sugar is the number one thing get the did get that the out of your life that get rid of sugar. I mean it's, you know, have a cookie, occasionally nothing wrong with that, but the people that have sugar every day, the drink, sodas and a drink so does any candy bars you're killing yourself at. But surely I get off the desserts by going to the mad russian. You ever hear this guy yeah. I have heard of him.
Okay, he's got like an eighty six percent success rate for no smoking every now and then the same. The mad show with actual name it's in there, can you, google him up. He'll he'll tell you, I don't know if that line, yeah he's in Brookline in his old he's, like eight thousand seven hundred and eighty eight years old right. So we had this thing for fat loss. Not anything with fat loss. I'm always looking at yeah yeah, saying that Fm Jabah self right then, and look at his hands and that's what, when those hands were not procedures, I am not a I am not a but there's, no, no, no don't drink soft drinks often give you multiple sclerosis is what he says in eraser of addictions, depression, anxiety and phobias. He works with smokers, drug addicts, alcoholics and over eaters celebrities, who said they have had success with his treatments in Billy Joel drew Barrymore David Arquette, Courteney Cox, Arquette and Amy TAN. Where is Amy TAN, and why
many car kinda yeah got. What what he's got I couldn't get in for years so one day I go to see him and we go and eat three hours. This guy's talking and- and you know what yeah, I'm not the imposition. I'm listening to everything that I want to get on there for chocolate cake show chocolate cake is my kryptonite. I see a joke, all God any kind of cake, but the chocolate, although I don't know whether to fucking read it sometimes both so anyway. Now I go when I listen to him and at the end he goes and now we go one on one and I don't know we're going one of those that want you to tell me what you're doing with these are not now. Ok, close your eyes and tell me what you know: nice warm here for a chocolate cake. I should I chocolate cake, pizza and cheese. The next night, I'm going tonight, then I have all three it didn't work. However, I never I never drank it. I was drinking ten Samsung Tab a day, that was in my ride. I only have one thing in my ride a case of tab and it was a joke tabloid, but that's what I Frank. You know some people drink, diet, coke! Try, I drank tab, you know, was cool paint, cans, water, beautiful?
how many even knows what that is anymore, no cook the millennials flip out everything about me. I'm I'm like I'm like a stone age person to me, that's cool! So now I don't drink that. I found myself restricting water on it. So I said you know what that guy hit me. He hit me with the right thing. I gotta go back five years. I tried to get back in a can. Do a father's day, about seven years ago. There's an opening and I go in in the room of people from Switzerland, Spain, Argentina, Greece, couple people from New England and me and because I've seen you before you do not have to pay again, oh no, I'm not in, for that is a sixty five dollars I wanted I wanted. I listen! I listen to you. Ok now I have the one. I want me I'll go first, so I'm going to make this ok to close your eyes. Tell me what you don't want to do with never not just for a month but forever. You never have again like. Ok, the chocolate cake kept up, fuck all digits, but everything would have dessert pastries everything there very goes. Poof next day I go to
bakery in Somerville and places crowd they go. Let me come right up the front 'cause, I'm good for the big pot sailing. What do you want? Nothing I haven't had a desert in seven years. That would be rain. Is my thing? Okay, might we still get? Will cream yeah? Don't get dessert? No, just no just yourself, okay cream! A lot of it will come a ball. We like a bowl of a scoop it out with a spoon, I will sometimes Don't even use this phone. I scarface that thing right up, whip cream with pudding. It's pretty God, Damn good chocolate pudding with whipped cream, yeah that'll, be alright, say: say: cold whip cream and warm pudding like just made it like if you just made it. Oh, this is food point. Alright, welcome to food porn! Goodness people don't know about warm pudding. 'cause, nobody makes pudding, that's right. These fucks they just buy it. My mother used to make them more important. My bad smell like a sample smell. I remember from my childhood, but today nobody Fucking makes pudding now. Fuck makes put it that's. Why
yeah I had already made. I have to whip cream. We go to a fancy, restaurant and cinema wife. You want some dessert or something. Maybe I will submit what you give me a bowl of whipped cream about a bowl of a criminal. They bring everyone ever you looking at me. What is he happy? I have a bowl of ice cream that mind your business at works. Why don't? They just sell that a bowl of whipped cream that would probably fly off the shelves. Maybe I should open up a franchise whip cream. It might be cool whip cream, hey nobody! Fucking new Starbucks is going to take off the doorman. You know that when we were kids you get, a cop cup of coffee was like zero dollars and fifty cents or zero dollars, and twenty five cents you go to a diner was easy. Now the coffees three dollars for a small cost. Five venti two coffees this morning, eleven dollars, that's crazy! I know it's just coffee, but something happened. Starbucks figured it out, make
junkies, then turn everybody in a coffee junkie. Why does in cocoa get you high cocoa yeah cocoa? Well, it's not the same stuff. What does in cocoa come from the coca leaf? Now 'cause! That's how Awow see that's why but cacao who could be a scientist job? I have a lot of schooling to go through, but I could cow. It is not what cocoa comes from. It doesn't come from coca leaf. Coca is cocaine. I mean, but you know that bad. I know job that I know you know I haven't had to leave. Have you tried to leave? Yes, I did it like it's great see. What's at the top of the mouth, he just give me a body follow Maine. It just gives you a little taste. Oh my god! Well, you know I went. I went down to Cartagena. I went on TNT travel '
Right now I mean like one hundred and ninety nine dollars. I took this name. I could have cocaine tour. Yes, I show that in half- and it took me- almost a day and a half to find the blow. When I got the car, I go hey man. Can we get your things yeah? I want. I wanna lot blow as much as you can get me there with No, I haven't, but I mean you know it's what you make in its wake up to see you. We said the Little America got there's going to be a shipment that didn't go, but it's gotta be one way get senior Lenny. The blood ended up going to where they made it. I was sure the smoking it something like you rub it. On my ass everything. I need cam hardcover to blow juggling announce for like one hundred and eighty dollars. What's it normally cost a couple grand? back at the time. At the time,
well? Listen is, I'm sure will know Google at his sons of hey man. It's like know said people think anyone who thinks I'm making this shit up ok yeah make it what it what it imagination I would have. I don't have that good imagination. I was telling how whacked I am is a person I'm always a corroborated, there's, also there's a lot of witnesses. That's why I haven't read the book. A few more people got to die for us. We open dies. First, for the book comes out. You know dad died that I've ripped Taylor died. Yeah. I heard today right. Okay now, when I first thought of doing comedy Hollywood squares, I did it with him. Did I don't yeah? I did was great one, the nicest sweetest compass. Why am I Joe? I used to write comedy when it first started. I'd spend time in my room. I saw everything on Lenny Bruce I just
delved into and Lenny used to listen to his tapes for hours on end. I didn't realize he was listening to his performances. I thought he was sitting in a room with the tape running. You should say something, and I like that right, so it does start out at them- is not be doing something wrong right. Yeah I swear to God. I right yeah yeah, you think I want people not up, so I go down like Omar. What do you think of this joke? I don't know, then I guess it's funny. I don't know your guess is funny. Well who do you like shoes? I, like reptile reptile, you know we had sex with little boys get out of my kitchen. I love repellant. Why do you think hides makes ft fifty seven varieties you'd only funny person will get alot it, and I I hate to rip Taylor because she he was my mother's favor.
Search where I wanted to be a favor committed, so I'm working to dunes? This is thirty. Five years ago, then an polish I'm up by the pool and I'm drinking at outcomes, Pauly Shore and Josi with RIP Taylor, and I go oh, my god. Will you introduce system to me and before I can get towards out of my mouth he's got me crying he's one of the funniest people quick funny. Look at the water buffet for me at all. I should say I too, would you do me a favor, because we show what I mean. Would you would you a lot of my mother for color on the phone, because, of course I would so late and they bring the phone love with Concord. This is yeah yeah yeah, so I got my my wants a L'Odeon name change, hello G in its ripped, a law here, my mother and he he spent like two minutes on a family so sweet.
I love the guy ever ever since I didn't tell him what I said God was made when I was just I was lashing out. I was a kid I didn't know, but one of the disguise and I got to work with him at the Hollywood squares and we did a couple of benefits to get, but I sweet, sweet and funny yeah. I never got to meet him, but he was a funny guy. So love on Hollywood squares, oh god, they would always come to him when they wanted a little comic relief. Absolutely well! You know I'm going to tell you something this field. Thank you for the answer. Did it really? No? No! No! No funny uh, but you know 'cause. I was throwing my own stuff out there. I wonder I wonder I was really getting cock in your comment. What I want
may to make money can turn on the ground. That's like running! Oh! I did this. Every man and me I love him. He's the one that I did a movie with Henry: he was the greatest guy. All he wrote a book called, there's no idiots on the river about fly fishing. He loves, fly fishing yeah in order to talk about our fly fishing as well, telling your parents your day. No, my wifes joke she's a big, my wife's, a big fisherman. Really, oh god, yeah she did. You live on an island. I live. I still there. Yeah still Mama was not left on. My room Obama lived on my road is it like can get near the house guys, with guns everywhere guys with guns everywhere, really when he was to President they wore, What is the road twice a day, so the dust won't rise when the
I swear that God is, God is my judge, so I would pull up another secret security. A man tell us a joke. Funny man and I tell him a joke at that. Laugh they. Let me go because the next roach there was this was the preliminary road stop to see if you even belonged in that property. This is about sixty houses. At my place, where I live in, I got like five and a half acre estate. I married wealth again, John yeah. I know yeah yeah it's up, but it was that yeah and she has a job she's, a fisherman. What class fishermen? What about you know? really captain though yeah she she takes me out and pulls me alongside the shocks and I got no get the we pulled up alongside basking shock that they had to be two thousand pounds biggest thing ever simmer go ahead and pack I'm not going to put it, doesn't have teeth a camper but yeah. It's already. Let me clock
that by a giant secret, you get the fuck, but I've been on a boat. I was on about three times to share with great whites. She's got a thirty two foot boat, almost more than half the boat that big grey wow yeah there everywhere there everywhere. There is a lot of amount in Martha's vineyard, like God, yeah yeah. They were saying around the cape. There's a lot around the cape. I got an app called sh activity they tag all these great white and when the great whites come near, where you are It goes off when I go and you lookout you can see them. Incredible. Is a video of this. This guy and this shark comes by the boat, and you can't even believe it's real you've seen that video, that's what that was on my wife's Facebook page was that from
okay, that was from the venue. It was yeah. Okay, yeah! It's it's insane! It's like a twenty foot! Long shark yeah, it's so big, it doesn't make sense Joe. It looks fake yeah, that's right, it's not fake! Now it's unbelievable. What I talk to the there whenever they want yeah. Yes, seals seals, there's a lot of sheer and when, if you ever see seals and you have a swim in this field, leave the water because the Jack said the landlord. Did you ever see the video off of fisherman's wharf in San Francisco, where a great white Mark Cecile right in front of everybody? Yes holy shit, that video right and the water fills with blood and that breaks all the other shocks just blood everywhere, and the people are like gathering around the water watching it like holy fuck. Looking off the dock, do you remember curt Gowdy, yes, yeah his son Trevor Gotti came to me
said the. Why? But not why Willis what what? What what yeah yeah could got it and he did all this. He did the first five symbols and I mean right: he was the man his voice, yeah, so is sunset. We want you to do this thing for the outdoor life channel. We fish- and I I'm not for sure, but I suck at this year's on on the ship. Well usual wife's boat, and you can be a celebrity. I said: okay, because we've done five six celebrities are okay will be at the blue fish. Now that's been done, albacore done stripe. Is that what we got shock shocks I just so we go out this really rough day, man and will go out. We go out about sixty miles and the water is rough and halfway out we stop and catch bluefish. I forgot the debate like, oh my god, so we get out seven miles. Eighty miles off shore, I cast a line within twenty seconds. I got a four hundred pound, make call on my line and a blue for a bomb blew and I'm gonna. All medical really outliers make it. They don't look
among the tv. I got fuck you edit it at distinct, heavy right. So then she cast and she catches a five hundred mako. I said you couldn't, let me be the stuff. Thirty. Second, sugar showdown and we do to shoot it's unbelievable over so a year later, I'm going through Kansas City and guy comes up. Hey, hey man, I show you on that fishing shirt with the shark say: oh yeah you're the worst fish. I've never seen him. Yes, I am I suck at that, but you hunting. I show you shooting guns in the day. Yeah I just shot at the mat light shoot out this. We you know we played for the patriots and you drive on the Gulf countries. Shotguns, it's yeah! It's amazing, general golf cars and shot yeah yeah and you shoot Skeet yeah and you can't drink until after it's over the first year. You could drink Would do it? No one got hurt, but you know
would rules so now I couldn't get limbs pretty sure. Boo made Lydia glad that guys you up, but now I can't show every year, I'm in the celebrity quickdraw. You know it's a pistol long long guns, I'm pretty good. I am SM really good. That long runs but pistols, not so much, but I'm fast, so like if you need a guy, let out suppression, FI I'd be a guy, so we got drawn. I did you did you and I don't have a thing, but this year I had four out of five, so you should know that your pretty good shot, not really I'm learning I bought I want again I want, when you see a guy like this guy named Terra Butler, who runs at Taran tactical place. When you see him shoot either a world champion shooter you go. Oh ok, yeah. I guess this levels. Does level list Joash I like slow as fuck to someone like I shot with the fastest guy fastest
pistol guy in the world and he said Lendia very fast, but you're horrible name. You have no way No I'm whatsoever, you very quick! Well, I'm learning about that world the world of competitive shooters because of that Taran Tactical place me and Tom Segura. We start going down there because if you ever seen, Tom stand up no fucking, I already already Solari's fucking, where I've seen something stuff on you too yeah he's. Right. We work together for the first time twelve years ago with Charlie Murphy rest in peace me and Charlie and John Heffron. We're doing this maximum bud light comedy tour. Yes, and we taught around the country and they would have a local guy open up and do a few minutes but or Heffron have from going to be easy. It was to be either me or Charlie after him and so growing up in Phoenix and you I was so funny. I couldn't believe off I didn't know who he was We do not like a few years and we became great friends ever since and now you up. But then we do this.
So we're October thing every year with Arisha fear and Bert, Kreischer and uh this year. We have to take ten different classes of something anything yoga class boxing class, so we started taking tact. Shooting in learning. You know just learning how to shoot pistols correctly 'cause. I knew how to shoot rifles for hunting yeah I've. Never the only thing. I've ever I've shot pistols before with no instruction just pulled the trigger and Right Kenny Rogers. It says that I am the worst hunter in the world, because when I moved to the vineyard I remember the first year everywhere out there isn't it. I didn't know that and I came home one night lit up and I get out Oh my god, I did just popped in front of the door. I backed up and stepped on a wild turkeys for foot
off whenever I get job done holy shit, baby that that there's so much people is up that they broke out of his own. That's not that that's what these animals that do not live around my property, so I could have gone right and the squirrel sweet on my bird feed and feed the birds, and so I'm going to kill you passage. Of course, I was drawing further to write them and I gotta couple of, but then I I don't. I really kill him, but I think I'd like to shoot the tail off. You know maybe write dates, but the bastards move and I'd get him in the head. I go now so the squirrels suffer. Now. Look what you made me. Do you you stupid, passing freedom, no good, well! Well, yeah! I give him to the end of people in the neighborhood. You know, but but I I don't kill me because I football when I get exactly want to kill my men in another right, I'm not just in one of the the bird flu exactly yeah, we had a problem with our chickens, the squirrels we get into the chicken coop and check and food. Well, the death, not a dead, my wife's birthday today I told the caddy cat he's gone.
I showed the other night I'm coming home at this, tell you not to swerve, I don't sweat, I go for them. I changed yes, it's all. I just might will feel and get a, but you could die that way too. Yeah. Well, yeah, because you know my friend can his: he lives in Eugene Oregon and a guy in his neighborhood guy in front of them hit a deer and it flew up in the air and landed through his windshield and kill them. Oh yeah, so driving down the highway guy in front hits the deer boom dear comes flying through the air. Hank right through the winter, the second guy yeah yeah, you guys when that's why I never follow anyone always lead lead, create a lead pony slow. But behind me that's, but with the with the deer IBM when I got there, I had I had a partial view of the ocean in the house to be built, lotion, BO and and what the time I was you know, and then it says: a double for Thai phone camera to college,
trees down in the trees came down, but I replaced every tree that was missing. We bought up to two nursery school should do nurseries that we're going. I gotta, I live illegal to chop trees down. Evidently it also glad you didn't do that. I would. Why would I talk? I'm a law abiding person. I understand so I bought two new she's going out of business and we have five hundred race not over six feet tall, but then we had guns and vegetables and stuff like that and the deer were eating him and I'm at the beach one day in a pissed off from sees God there and it's this this old guy. Could some excuse me. Excuse me Silverjet conversation. This is what deer don't eat and give me a list like fifty things, so I went up by everything, and I'm week later I saw hey shithead. Evidently, my dear can't read 'cause. They ate all that and then I just thought so, I'm not good at killing stuff. I did kill a couple, you know by mistake:
really did I try to scam and you know they ran into the pool that is supposed to be shooting with. Ah, but this was a twenty two like the rifleman now but yeah sh? I love my woman, yeah yeah yeah used to love that job. Well, I got one right, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah yeah, so I got really good, but it also like one of those repeating like a Henry rifle. Exactly exactly still make those you know, Henry Rifles is like a big rifle company Kenny came down when we can't Kenny Rogers and stayed up. All night refers to sleep went through about hundred rounds and the gun was still smoking the next morning and I got to get it fixed now. He like I I have anyway guys. I would call it call up my kid tickets get all you want to yeah, I'm on my way, so he came over his how much you kill ago, or just this one here tomorrow: yeah they go, 'cause I was fired into. The Bush is scared. Evidently I got them so is there rule on how many are allowed to kill?
during season or my kitchen table. I I was, I get out yeah yeah yeah right by the screen door, open yeah, but I but I I don't I don't I don't do it anymore, but but but it's just Jameela I love you know Jim Miller Hockey player brought it. They hired him to protect Gretzky years ago it I don't think he I think I lost one fight in his life. He's a tough tough son of a anyway, the top hockey ten test, ten best top flight season like three of them. So he says. Can I come how to you properly be great, come over and kill all my dear, so he gets like six seven guys and they come up with these unbelievable. Bandolero's and shared by seeing this is great. So so he people on in his trucks and have all these big trucks, and I can I I thought Jay man, I'm so glad you got, kill everyone. You can find him on a man
This is a killer, rabbit, say and yet my wife in about on out, so I got to go out Delhi March. This is a man. Listen to me, my neighbors, both my name isn't a god. Gonna kill every day every rap, but I mean imagine that testosterone, yeah what they look like Mexicans coming down here, to kill rabbits. It seems ridiculous. No, not at all the way to Martha's vineyard to kill rabbit is a lot of rabbits them rabbits and skunks right and someone someone brought skunks are not indigenous Sylvania. So this asshole brought skunks over 'cause. He was pissed off some of the rules. We couldn't go any left and they multiply in this country. I was incredibly skunks, you know, so he brought sconce over to piss somebody else, yep yep, who is this guy I am out for
thank you know. I know yeah it'll come to me I'll I'll I'll I'll take. She is there to little animals with Del the funky chickens. Up to you know, skunks are predators, don't you don't oh yeah, you know I mean if you got a cat spray, this shit out how's. It all got error when they get a betaman tomato juice and work on my dog got zapped. It does yet not the dog out here. Show, but when I was a kid, my dog in Boston got zapped to manages, didn't do Should she stomped her foot in weeks all that we kept shampoo inner. Yet all got you know when you asked. Is there a limit for the animals? You can kill one. I killed my first turkey. I thought that some guy home dolls well, it's funny when it was three missing ago. He's gonna know: history missed he's going to come up here and give me lots of shit. You know get rid of and they cooked. It was really Jamie. I had a piece of not good. You cook it right. You get
right right, but I had wild Turkey news, really good yeah, I'm sure if you do it right, but yeah these guys are there no teeth and everything ever just when is there a hunting seat? turn on. Martha's vineyard shoot deer. Yes, they really yeah. I think it's twice and then there's bow and arrow season 'cause. I let some guys what stands in my yoga, five hundred acres? How many deer do you have out there? A lot of dish? A lot of tests- and you know I've- noticed, there's a lot of twelve year old, a lot of twelve point bucks. These are Elk. Well, there was a ten point buck. M my property, I'm a guy bags and wow. It's I think, dear yes, huge debt yeah and they they have little Digimon Bambi yeah, and I mean you know, there's no predators not so thing about Martha's vineyard if they're out on that island yeah how the fuck they get out there. I don't know Joe. I have no I'd be uh The guy brought the skunks and I know they brought tears to deliver Dearden's. I don't know, but they might have swam, but they could swim. They can you
they can swim. I've seen him swim across rivers and if you, if you swim on a calm day from Falmouth to dominion, it's probably five six miles, you could do that. It could be done. You can be done for sure and who knows it might have been closer at one point in time in history. You know they have the Cape COD Railroad train, they had a bear. If the train show I swear to God, you get on the garbage train and it was eating and gabbed drove across the canal. You know they've, let them revel approach out in the bearish shower down and they don't even know- and people called this a bear on the train in ago yeah. That's very funny and he ended up down down near the bottom of the cape. Well, there's a shit load of Pasadena, really they happen people's pools. That's a real problem! There's a good one of my favorite videos, this guy's walking on the street looking at his phone and he's just looking at phone, not even paying attention, and he literally of a
there's like from you to me? They turns runs away and the bears like. Oh there, black bear do not dangerous look with you can be. What would you rather have in your pool, a black bear or an alligator? A black bear yeah because you could yeah, you could talk to them. You can scare the bear away get out of here. You fuck the alligator alligator to death, right God, damn time so Russell yeah. Look at this one. This is these two old people this past in as well, so these two old people and apparently back then I'm looking at didn't even pay attention and watch the guy locks, his door walk who's, going to walk away, and this fucking bears look hello. Oh my they said like a nice bath. Well, it's residential bears what it is: they're they're used to being around people. That's a that's a habituated bad! that's the problem. I'd like to teach him how to drive along the Pasadena is a beautiful place. Imagine that Your bear drive the lawn mower with pepper said: did you ever ever ever work out there in Pasadena
I sounds yes, I have yeah yeah one thirty, eight! You can love it out there, and so you know they're there, but it up against mountains out there yeah. You know it's pretty close to big bear as well, so this route a bears out there and they're in the top in people's pools and swim around people come home is fucking, Mama Bear and two cubs swimming around their pool, don't fuck with them! No, no! No! No! No! Four people been Jack so far. Just this bow hunting. Season in Montana, by grizzlies? It's almost, who is a mama bear with cubs? Now, where do you in Montana, no. I haven't hunted in Montana few years. Last time actually hunted in Montana was with board ain. We went pheasant hunting outside of Bozeman, but my wife, my wife, had a place in in Bozeman Bozeman's friend It's unbelief gorgeous. Do you ever go to that hotel where a guy rode the horse into the elevator? It was in stripes. I forget it well. The list I did yeah because I was the guy right- was use over there. Yeah yeah, the yeah, the guy, who is the the the drill sergeant that I'm
Is that a lot of movies and no. I have been to that one, but yeah Bozeman's, fucking great, but most hunt in Utah, have fun in Colorado, opponent, Alaska, one hundred a lot of places that Montana it's amazing. We went there after Whittier earthquake 'cause she found out. So we left the first flight out was Utah and then from Utah we went to Bozeman. So just to hide weather, falls apart, yeah right yeah. So now we going the Yellowstone and the snowmobiling ing. You know, and I never do. That you know I mean I may be fine, There was no rules and well Golden Yellowstone. Now Clinton had it, you have to go in a tool back, then you could go just rent
and go off on your own? Oh really, oh yeah, and they have Clinton change that as she did. Why is Clinton change? I don't know if you catch me, fuck you! No more! No stomach! You gotta stay on the trail I went. I ended up going to old, faithful, faithful lodge and I was still smoking and drinking. I think back. Then we wanted to see if that at old, faithful from went off every hour on the hour, and so I went out at like four monitoring. I think it's a scam. I think that, like everybody, I'm going to be a investigative reporter, so I'm smoking a joint and about that's just me and outcomes this this out from the other side looks at me and I look at him and I go. I want to fuck with this guy and the thing went off and we both looked and then we both his back the way over the wildman.
Some guy got attack. Recently, a lady e l, I in Elk a yeah- and I if well you know what the devil minutes traffic trying to change it, especially right now, because they're right now, this is this- is the right right now This is the end of the rock, is we're into October, but the rut is basically from like the first week in September to somewhere around the last week in September. It might go on sometimes they'll right into October in California. This they'll still right right now, they're still running right now for them, when fucking its color right, yeah 'cause, when I'm not fucking. That's over that surround hilarious. Now I've just coming out of a right. What happened in West Yellowstone it's the snow. Book capital of the world, and they have realized that come out from Michigan would shoot up, snowmobiles that you know like like Rockets right and this gangs of nice people realized and that I met
they were in the bar and everyone was shellstone drives around on the streets in an obvious? Is Morse numbers than cars unlimited, how many cars so I'm pretty fucked up and I start getting cocky after day two on his number and I go up off this rich and when I'm Babylon and I come down in some fucking trees. That's a lot so that the snowmobile is buried right and my wife comes to work. What the fuck, if you thought now we got, I don't know, help me help stick to. We can pull that up and who comes up with the guys. I met the bot at morning. One thousand am and they pulled it out with me, and you should you should be able to make it back in anger, while, while the fronts all fucked up- and I went ok- so we bring it back and she's willing to tell a guy, I go, I'm going to tell him we get charged by Buffalo so so so so she she X in hers and I qualify excuses. I gotta touch base and what happened? What happened as well as she would happen is what happened and she goes. I walked over just it's the guy with him
Buffalo kid. I've never heard that story. I've never heard any. We would charge about buffers. As one hundred and fifty bucks, I said great. Its value should charge three I should maybe I would have paid it was all fucked up. The light was broken, but you can't do that anymore. Last time how's an asp in we rent did snowmobiles and there's like a course that you go, they take you on this run and they Take you all the way up into the mountains like there's a whole area that can take you. Please stop you get hot chocolate. You overlook this trout, can fantastic, it's really cool Aspin is amazing, Joe. I went out to aspen with a a buddy of mine who all D'Angelo Sub shops. Okay, prime plus, he's great guys. What do you call it? Sub shops D'Angelo's, you would you buy a sub from a guy named one as well? No, not saudi. We fly out to ship stop in Vegas and we and
but the Glenn Frey Ed Polak tournament. It used to be Glenn Frey, building the Jimmy Buffett, yeah yeah yeah, yeah yeah. How cool is that right? So now we're out there and we check into this hotel Jerome, and he said what do you wanna do then? I said: well, you know I'd really like to get a mountain bike and come down that ski slope. Don't forget that I stay one, so he rents three Suv's, there's like twelve us and we rent Mount but mountain bikes. You know any texts up there to the top of like the continent
the Vita some shit. He was ok, let's go and there's no guides in it. I had flip flops on right now. I went down at fourteen thousand feet, I'm passing fucking cars and he says somebody get that fucking more so that the SU bees Brian want you to pull up. When I go out with that, you get fucking killed. This is like a ten thousand foot drop on assigning. Alright man, alright 'cause it was. It was just so much fucking fun. You know I mean I don't give a shit, so he ends up getting bumped by one of the guys in the group relies on liked anyway, ends up in the fucking hospital, so he rides by me covering fucking blood nigga. What happened to go out beyond came in just just get back to the hotel. So now I gotta paddle back to front 'cause. I'm at the bottom not make a pound by their draw so I said how's he doing this. It doesn't want to see you. I said what he said doesn't want to see you. I said: why is this is afraid you make him, laugh so I went as a bridesmaid. I want is started. Laughing lot, get out, take the fucking jet and just go home
it hurts me so much the lap, but it was funny you mention the Eagles, because the night before we go off, we got off. At this I mean everyone's a Kevin Costner always be stars. I mean remember Kevin Costner's. What do we eat and I says yeah, what you eat, I'm account, can I use as you can have it brother, wild game buffet, you know not every hole they have like animals that are endangered some really great and boots and and and friendly women. It was pretty really really sure. After after thing we shower up- and we go to this little place- must tell about two hundred and fifty and the show is the Eagles the market in Thia Pillar fifty people in the eagles and were walking in and hey Brian. I adorable a price for her, your friend that's
fucking Eagles yogurt to my yacht. One week they never fucking forgot about it, everybody's with him. So we met the fucking Nager who by then oh yeah. I was crazy. Why yeah? Why was at holy shit but Aspen's famous that kind of party and right yeah. That's why I think that's why they used to have that Aspen comedy festival, a parasite excuse yeah. I did that one. It was an excuse for people to ski in party yeah, I'm in Ashland School I mean I go to Vail every year for cystic fibrosis. We do a big tournament up. There was skate them in your rates and Jen, I'm horrible, but you know people pay big money to see me crash. I'd offer to kids yeah that whole aspen area? You know it's beautiful in the winter, but my god you go there in the summer and you see what it looks like you are now in a while is rich people about all my yeah because it standing that was the only time I was over there with the Watson snow. I did yeah. I did. I think this will come with us. We'll try some it's also now and in the year I golf with Brian in the contract tournament was, it was just beautiful or just now gorgeous in and hunting.
I could see me in you Hunter from the chair, lift now well, there's more Elk in Colorado. Then I think any other state. I think it's got the most of any statement, who eat almost everything you kill right now. I eat everything. I think that most of Wait. Is that I'm having Elk for dinner tonight marinated it today, no kidding yeah, yeah, marinated it and vacuum sealed in the fridge. Right now, when I get home I'll cook it yeah yeah, Yes, I did a bunch of different way late sausage say so that that's that is good yeah. She I don't want to be able to kill animals just to kill. No, I I feel bad, I mean look. I would if they were nuisance. Animals is something that, like a coyote, was killing my check. Ins are, I run a mold yeah, but you know I love Elk. It's like it's the healthiest food. You can eat night. I you to almost every day. What's the biggest animal you think you've killed until the moose once yeah, that was a normal social. Open up in Maine.
There are unbelievable there. So big doesn't make sense when you see when walk across the road for the first time. The first time I saw it, I was like what the fuck the first time I ever saw moves in the wild. Actually it was we pulled over. I was hunting with my friend MIKE Hawking's in in DC and bridge call and we pulled over the side of the road and we lookout at this field, and it was just cows. It wasn't even bowls and they were walking across the field they looked. It was like Jurassic Park. I couldn't believe how big they were. I was like look at those fucking death. Yeah Jesus Christ there so big when they're angry, oh my god, damn it very well might got chased by one. He was. He was riding on a horse and a fucking cow moo started chasing them and he said he barely got away. Dad got- oh, my god so fast, they're, so big yeah, I so long and it ganglion ship between them in motion. Will they gangly, so they can walk through swamps and the they spend a lot of time. Like my buddy,
John Dudley is actually in British Columbia right now, hunting moose he actually shot one. Yesterday, if you go to knock on tv on Instagram, he shot a moose yesterday in his body shot one a couple of days ago. That is one of the biggest movies I've ever seen in my life, but it's also swaps. Yeah. These things are in the swamps of those long legs aid them because they can walk through that swamp water. You know, I mean there there, it literally like where their body starts. The bottom of the body starts, it might be five and a half feet off the ground, wow, that's a big cheese and I and then the rest of them in and then the head in the for Can antlers everything is enormous. They're huge! You mentioned, you wish you shouldn't pheasant wood, but then yeah I never met him. I was going to me. I love he was ossia. Now did you. You are obviously a defendant yeah. When you got it, I didn't get.
One, but he got one right. I just I clip one. I missed I just not to feather loose. I went down to my wife's house in Virginia early on and I met her for her dad a dad was a big bird. How to add. This is why I love eat, but you never in France and and he went there, went there closet and pulled out a shotgun right when I have a bam bam. He kept waiting pheasant tonight he kill the pheasant. It is back. I mean it was like to in Middleburg, which first time. I have a fresh ideas: delivery of asunder- they're, very, very good. You know it's funny, you mention both. Is there anybody? You know 'cause you're, going to great position now Joe. Is that anyone that you'd like to beat that you haven't met yet I'm sure yeah. A lot of scientists like Dawkins Wanna, Meet Richard Dawkins. Soon he's going to do the podcasts, I'm very excited to meet him yeah, but now I mean you know and that's funny. You said because I agree scientist and I like should be a rock
they should ship for me superhero by me too. I mean these people. Can change the course of life yeah, not just one, but for many well, it's also important to to for a dummy like me to have someone like that explained. I got have a this guy. Showing care was just your couple days. Donors trying explained to me Quantum physics and Quantum mechanics is like I've. I've read that book of listen to that book onto I listen to him talk and I'm I'm out of got like one percent of what he was trying to convey because it's really complicated, no dummy, but I I'm so happy to guys like him around exactly so try to explain it to people like us. Well, I tell you know you have all that gym equipment and I thought about this and you could do me a favor. I bought a grab a try and you know it but why didn't buy? I was given with the gravity right now. You know I have the dip and pull up assist machine. You can put the different weight, yeah like those. What are those things? Called's attic
yeah, that's that's the new US, but mine was the original graphic tron. It was the thing with the with the club, but like a computer center and a propulsion, oh yeah, I remember those every time you saw what you'd get on it. You just little red light: yes, yeah, yeah, yeah well liable. I've always wanted one and Steve stripper. You know shrimps puppy, say Lenny, I'm leaving Vegas. I move into the octave through the blue route in a blue button. So he says you can have it is, but you gotta move I should, right, so I called college guy knows's moving company and he goes money. I love to do a foyers outdoor for cause, so we moved it from LAS Vegas to Vaniah two grant wine through grad right right. So now I get Kenny and a bunch of other guys. And we drive down to my house and we try to get it up step for more money by living with my wife is you're not having that now single, it's bitch bitch, which want only
I want only toy ever wanted. I love this thing. You know, so we couldn't get it up into the living room so you try to twelve feet tall. You know and five of us will we got in the wall and it was, I believe, that's it didn't vote. So now I got. I got a place to put it because of my goal is to build the garage and have my own jam at pool. I've needed pool too, but you gotta have goals so I put it in this garage. We have down at the plantation whatever it says state right. And this asshole neighbor, you have any asshole neighbors know now 'cause you're too far away right, I'm lucky. Are you nicely with what most of my neighbors up this guy sucks? I hate this guy old Joe ain't, this good bird boy anyway, I love disparages parotta, nicest p. But I think he wanted him dead. So Kennedy inherit the man ever did everything in his mother, Father sweetest. Is that no for dinner I love you. This is a sick fucking anyway. He he,
how's, my wife, we're going to move it everything out of that out of that garage. So we can clean it. Well They went when cleaning thirty years. I had all I know. Is he going to move things out of your garage is shaped because he beat up a couple of old elderly women and had to move their boats, so we can move its new brand new tractor in their matching this shit. So yeah yeah it's pretty well? This is what happened to me. So the phase is coming so anyway, you don't have to kill anymore. He I said don't move it I'll be back. I was on the road, I shall be back Monday, but they moved it anyway and when they move the brain part of it came out and there are No, no! That's that's lost today launched the combat but yeah, but yeah he tore away out of those through the yeah me too, just he's a dick like that and now everyone in the whole association hates him. Anyway. People have all the norm Helaman and I'm building eight. So the guy I said, hey man, he goes Monday. Do we have a yeah? We had problem? I go. I moved that day across countries a friend of mine gave that to me
I was going to be the centerpiece of my home gym and you up you like well. You know I'm sorry. These things happen. These things happen is so now I have a twelve foot tall, basically yeah sculptor, sculpture, yeah, and I got we take that so doesn't he didn't even offer pay? No, no, and if he did, if he offered to pay, I would have been ok and even if he didn't, but he didn't even He was a member of the so there's a guy who invented Lanny parts is his name and I went on. I had little millennials. I may try to find this guy to truckers up all paid a guy. I thank you yeah. I think the guy would want me to have it he's the guy who invented this their master from the stair master, the grabbit roll up a picture. Then things Grava Tron define conservice the right thing
potion assist, I I you know yeah. This guy could tell us what yeah it's it's just. It's gives you a little assess on going up to in a browser. Doing chin up, gives you exact, but then every day work down the down, so not that the new model, but how the did they lose the the brain and the and the brand was it the deal with the original one. What was said no, don't want well yeah that one the big picture touch it the big picture, with the guy doing the chin up. Know that that's it! That's it this guide, lanny pots and two other guys in fact it and you can see with. You stand in that and there's the buttons you push right, the middle and the red bars. You got twenty million listeners. Maybe one are you guys, friends with Lenny PAL pay? Yeah I just want
at this one I want, and I want to get jacked I want to be. The despair walked the platter. I grew up that guy jumps negative outlook, but your bait bait don't yeah. Yes, I, like a guy yeah. I can't believe you lost the brain of it all. It broke my heart I made I definitely would college trip yet KIDS Ryan said they got your shrimp was so nice measure ripple, go to the guys house and fuck him up shrivel. Rip. I used to run the Riviera yeah. Oh yeah. He scared the fuck. Outta me a couple of times away dealt with. Hecklers sesame guide, take a cigarette and throw it on the ground and step on it in the showroom he fucking screamed at that guy got his face is like a you're going to die, scream trip and school Vegas yeah people don't know he's an actor or not. You know he got into acting. I think, because of drew Carey, I gave him one of his first this really under on Sunday comics I was in uh electric chair and he was a guy
rocket league and he never forgot that. He said she gave me a break and it always he always bring me last fucking love that I love this day. I worked for him in like ninety seven back in ninety seven. That was like the first time I ever worked for him, but he was then that was when drew Carey had the drew Carey Show drew Carey had got him apart on the drew Carey Show seems like I do it for the fucking for a goof every now now dual fucking acting and he wasn't being like a real actor and then all the sudden. I see him on the fucking sopranos. I was like holy shit you're on greatest show in the history of the universe and he was really good, but it's substantiated my feelings about acting. It's just pretending that it's not that hard I mean. There's acting like. Did you see the Joker yet no holy Shit saw the other night jam. You were right, holy shit, walking Phoenix is a fuck
master. I I it's a masterpiece. I love the money that you have the cash yeah like go to fit. Maybe I am and it's a up sick movie yeah, but it's that's what they were trying to do right. It's the greatest up, sick movie. I think I've ever seen I mean you might not be, do it if you're not into the whole. I'm sure, listen to me, joy, anything! That's done! Well! Yes, you know, I mean. Even if it's not my cup of tea yeah, you know, I mean I'll, go and I'll watch and I'll try to figure out what the message we're trying to get the point, and maybe I can connect with your vision, I'll give you that and if it sucks, uh he's coming out. It's not for me, but it's a masterpiece. It's a masterpiece Mean Todd, Phillips, nailed it and walking Phoenix on Phillips. As a master comments. Does this one of the darkest movies? There's not a funny fucking moment in that movie is not a happy moment in that movie, but it's a masterpiece. But the point is like that kind of acting like what Joaquin Phoenix does in that movie.
With Daniel Day Lewis. Doesn't his movies, like that's a different? It's a different connector that that's on another level, but like regular, acting like look at what Steve did. They gave him a fat suit. They put a fat suit on him and he who played Bobby on the sopranos any fucking nailed it knocked out of the park. You would think that that guy had been acting his whole life. You really would it was when you doing fair fact, you would do a lot of those things, that you had the stunts. You know you would no, no, no, no, they wouldn't. Let me do any of am no, because it was that you wanted to write uh yeah for sure this is far one yeah I did a couple of I did a couple of when I was doing meet Wally sparks with running Dangerfield. He said to me: ok, in this scene, your sword fighting coming down these marbles is and you're going to get stabbed you're going to roll down to go, call Todd, khemosabi, listen, I'm shooting the network tv show during the day, I'm here at night for you 'cause. I love you. I go. I can't get her
right. I was really fat at the time like three hundred and seventy I go I'll get hurt. Yes Twenty one of those will get a stuntman. He goes out you're going to make me pay for stuff and they go right. Yeah, I said, got nicer place place, so so this tankers and stuff man comes in right. Look like thanks for the job. I look at the dining out dog. This is what I look like. You know. Anyone kind of waves, my side am sorta. Guy gets up action and I know I cut, and then they put him in my spot. Let me get stabbed with this. One goes stumbling down the mommas and busters, I'm a bleeding from his ear and he only take. I think he could do one better than that right what about it, but it was hard. Yes road! Then we do a car scene. Despite missing money, you break Rodney out of the house, you get the Kerr you fast as you can up the road and you see the the lights up. There there's a bunch of cameras with sandbags. We want you to hit the break.
And slide into the set backs, but don't go any farther to send back. Okay, let's go, and I turn around Herat. Rodney, I'm a great driver. I should, but I don't know if I can I like it, I like a just run to see where the brakes are going come out, just don't kill anybody. Should I try. I try like a best man. If I could do about it, I drive an I hit the brakes and I saw six inches from the sandbag Total luck, but I mean it was like I'm thinking in a fireman. We got it yeah right see. I told you, you would be great lucky, but there is, if I could do, if you could chew, change. Anything in your life. Would you change anything? No, of course I knew you'd say that now ask me: would you change anything everything every single fucking thing everything did happen you got, she asked all follow. My life is full of fun at some someone said what, if you change everything you might
happy with you. Are they go yeah, I'm a roll, the dice! I could be fucking better off. You never know. You know I mean well. I learn from my mistakes. All of life hated everyone at fucking, one of 'em. I felt terrible every fucking mistake I've ever made, but it's made me a better person. I'm still making mistakes, probably asleep, still making new mistakes. It's just part of being a person. Man, everybody makes mistakes. I try to be a good person. I always tried to be a good person and sometimes How do you try the more fucking people Myszka stored on, miss understand for sure that that that that's, what makes me want to do bad things to people like your neighbor, the guy will last the brain of the Gravitron mean I wouldn't encourage, I say is name of the show? No, I will, and I know that I know it, but you know you, you see how I feel, and I and I'm a good. I told this guy, you could cut the trees improve its view stuff, like that, I was nice.
These parrots Lumia's parents are or that Lenny's the nicest go. You won't believe it's a little crazy, but from I used alone, come down, eat the fruit off the trees. Everything now this brawl. Please listen. Well, he's getting nervous is very wealthy and he's very you know it is born wealthy yeah. It's a tb yeah, that's a terrible place to be for a man I mean If I had a son, a fucking, kick him out of the house, make him go fend for himself. I really would not maybe if I did that to my kitty and upload sailors a fleet week, look like your baby. Don't daddy, I mean, but Amanda crows aren't without his own money you. How many peppers did you have for your? Oh, my god, hundreds wondering on my route. I had three routes. Yeah a couple. One hundred apiece had the herald for awhile. My main staple was the globe. I did the herald and I did the New York Times from the Devil Club New York Times in the Cambridge Chronicle wow
every now and then my father feel bad for me. Yeah you're not going to Where do you put up morning and she'll get in the car and reboot whipping amount end of your because he worked for Harold as I type operator, and he was proud of me for work in for, but what but what? If not don't want- like most something I can make real money. If you did that, like I did that ST that save me, while I was doing standup because it gave me money, like! I didn't have to have a regular job like I could get up in the morning, and I could deliver newspapers from five hundred am to like seven hundred and thirty am which drive you may wish job. You ever had construction for sure. Some of those construction gigs are rug, really rough. It depends on the company work for I work with my buddy Jimmy lawless and we built a wheelchair ramp for a Knights of Columbus Hall and all fucking I mean wasn't all summer. I mean I think I quit after three weeks, but all
that's about a summer. Yeah carry cement and pressure treated lumber at all every everyday, also and pressure treated lumber out in the sun and by the time five clock would roll around or whatever it was we quit. I didn't have anything left. I would just eat and fall asleep, and then I get up in the morning and do it again in it, but it taught me something like if you want to be a laborer for life. This is what life is and this is this a tired going to be you better figure out what you want to do with your life and get after it, because at the time I was probably like eighteen or nineteen I'll, never forget how hard it was at twenty one. I went to the National Labor's training center in Hop Kington Mass, but where they teach you how to be a labor teach. You teach you how to be a labor and the same thing with Smetana pressure. Read them, but if you got on your skin, it made all idiots splinters odd fact. If, however, chemicals and shit and from there I'd leave and I'd go to be a life guide and an afterlife God, I was Jenner in a couple of bones.
There's all that one that one time when my dad gets sick and I will take care of family but that I was sore truck operator, which was a great job. They used to have a claw on the back of a big big giant, pick up truck. You know I mean, and you swing it out and you pick up the the top of the sewer and then you put the clam in and you open it up, and you pick up and I went to every Byram in Cambridge. Is it get a lot of complaints about this thing coming out of the store out there? Really I can take it. Really want to have a beer around ship right. You don't know how many sidewalks I pulled up for getting a close, declared Boo Eddie set limits in the sidewalk people down again he got a cover for me.
I feel this hours I need to drink. To would be shit. Faced in a father put the put up or House CAFE a mesh of, oh, my God, the shine people. Nevertheless, you do Cushin zones like would you do with the whole, but until you fixed it? Well, we get it. We get. One of those movable shit is an we put that on one side of it and then we get the college and it got The guys would come and if, if you had the right crew, they could fix that sidewalk in a couple of hours. Why would you smooth it out? You know Offer your Massachusetts always has fucked up sidewalks, I mean or fucked up concrete concrete. You drive all the asphalt fucked up showing how about the highways. I first we're going to do this mile section in Sagus. That's good! Now we're going up Springfiel leave that right and then it's not finished how about the pig pig, how much long Did that take that was supposed to check that's one of the biggest corruption schemes and all of the history of construction. I know the big Dick people went to jail. The big dig was supposed to cost one point: eight
billion dollars and be done in seven years. The big dig is still not finish, and it cost twenty eight billion dollars. That's twenty six billion dollar over right. It's like going to a dry cleaners. How much Klima pinch twelve dollars you go back tonight. It'll be three grants. We ran into some problems. Everyone made when I was living in Maulden. They were working on yeah that was in one thousand nine hundred and eighty eight yeah there still were. Show date they put up four ton tiles with elmers glue and they thought it was going to that's what happened is clearly. Oh yeah look fifty one do role was originally fifty one million. Oh my god. It's still not done. It's still not done I would have not done, but it says,
constructed. Ninety one to two thousand seven. The F joke believe me down, but I I drive to all the time this budget, that's still an open date. It took him. Fifteen is open up the the tunnel to the village, what it says it's under seventy for thirty: first, it's official Boston's big dig will be done. The Washington post in two thousand and seven okay, but it's the just still fix it. Just has to the centerpiece of the big day is the Zaken Bridge was named african Lenny. Second, you know he is no nice guy community organize a philanthropist, wonderful person, Joe and the people are
sunset he's a jewel will blow that per job, so those I swear to God right, let me take America and I'm a friend of juice. I married you, I was in the tribe. I know your secrets. The fuck would be AL exposure, so I'm not like Eli Omar Killer juice. I love the choose them very good sex. Now. What happens they? They had eight people from Cambridge who were against the lens bridge being it because it cast a shadow on the Charles River, preventing the fish from being in the river to go out to the ocean and spawn First of anything in that river should not be allowed to Rico respond. A shadow stop in a fish. What the fuck you think fish do at night. Who said that it was doing that the was there. A real, like biologists recess, was no eight ugly women.
A bridge that we hate everything yeah during President Saturday Brown River? You can walk across another day. Is it gotten any better I gotta tell you it really has it has gotten better, but you can still you can still see shorts when people are owing whenever three as bad. You know they've. Well, I used to live in Newton. I used to live in Newton Upper falls across the street from like a section of the river, and we see carp in it yeah yeah yeah and then one day I was out there walking around. I saw some bubbling in the water and I watched a condom bubble up to the surface. Was it was a sewer pipe that was broken? It was weakened raw sewage right into the fucking river. That's where it goes now. Yeah yeah. Do you know in Fenway Park when you were a kid there groundskeepers Joe Mooney and Joe Mohney was famous Chris nobody, but nobody stepped on that grass. No, one even Yaqui you'll get up my babies like a crazed man and since then my friend
David melodies he's one of my dearest friends 'cause. I want to learn all about grass, because I smoked it and smoking is easy to grow and grow and it's a single, but he when he took over when the show was, would back up in Boston. They were the Flood Fenway Park and when the water receded, they'd be actually fish. Flapping in the infield We have pictures of it as well. You can bless you up and how did they come, from how many short from the river from the Charles River and it back up whatever's in those shorts would come up. Through what port like? How do we get into the grass area but it would rise from where, the water drained out of the ballpark? It would come back in and finish what and there's pictures of fish for open under field at Fenway Park? I don't know yeah yeah, you can go
The ticket to MILAN is identified. What ever got anything David Miller has written like eight books online. What I went there John and we invite me to to to come up and sit with him on my birthday, one night at family practice G as a girl ten twelve years ago, and he said to me Issa money, you wanna go sit, my c tested. Yes, so when he bought Fenway he extended a and fit. It is six. Oh two more rolls Royce TV's image right next up. Some said they would be if you could meet anybody on the ball, but in the organization who would you like to meet him at the grounds keeper? He was what you want to meet many orbit big popular. Now I want to meet the groundskeeper. Why I said you just had Jimmy Buffett out of two nights in a well there's, not a blade out aggression connected suppose, beautiful glass, beautiful, an indoor he gets on the phone David. Would you come down as I got Mister Clark? I go. You know me man, everything
to meet you. So we got was office yeah. I we've charted me. I gotta grab my people yard yeah right right. So then I invite him and his wife and kid found my place and they come down to defend it. Three weeks, edit, a semi, Lenny Clarke, Fenway Park Grass seed. My lawn looked like Fenway Park is the most amazing one. It's like shit now, but you kind of seed. Is it some magic that she was in the B axes, Joe, why it got a cut. They were going to kind of a you know. Lenny in my god I said: no, it was a salarian when I, when I bought it. When I bought this property, it was all over. On an one day, I was out smoking a joint, and I was picking up paper 'cause, I'm a land, baron yeah. I got holy shit, my Willits right, there's, a stonewall back in my house is surrounded storm was that you couldn't even see because the tickets and the brush was all over.
The next day. She must have like eight trucks in there and I have stonewalls, surround the my entire and just no did not. You couldn't even see him wow, yeah, weird, and then I added to my lawn, you know I had like I had like maybe half an acre along to get like three acres along and that's a lot along. That's a lot along too much work too much more. Who moe brazilian specific dad. Dad is not good with the longer I'm not good, and let me use power tools even arm sore, but not far to us for learning fish make good fertilizer. So they did you got something not a good reference photo, but this is a photo of a fish on you take up jobs, jobs, a story to go with Joe you. Your first day at work, the Red Sox January, two thousand, and one to Fenway Park. I set down with pre, is thirty year, heads groundskeeper Mister Joe Mooney discussed the nuances of Fenway Joe said David. If it rain, It really rains hard the dugouts flood, because the crown in the old field, I wasn't so
because I'd seen that before Milwaukee County Stadium, he then say: if really really rains hard. The antiquated, the storm drains will back up and water will come out of the marine manhole covers in fan concourse and then fled the concourse. If it really really really rains hard. The first base camera pit will fill up with water and the fish from the Charles River. A mile away will swim through this the drain pipes and swim into the camera pit and then swim out onto the field. I said wow Mister money, that's wild thinking. He was pulling my leg. I, when home my wife. You won't believe the stories that Mister Mooney tells fast forward to April Friday night before red Sox home opener on Monday, the overnight forecast, was for two to three inches of so we put the tarp on the infield when the rain stopped early. Saturday morning we receive all three inches of rain. I walked behind the plate towards a red Sox, dug out to check the conditions of the
warning warning track- and I couldn't believe my eyes when I looked- and I saw a fish laying on the grass I looked around for Joe thinking yet put a great prank on meat pulled a prank on me, but ' see him anywhere. I walked over to the camera. Sure enough it was full of water. I turned around looked. Where infield I saw seven more fish between the camera pit and second base. In my rush to get top off now sunny skies and get ready for my first red Sox, opener I and actually through all the fish away. I have wished since then I could have saved the fish and had them displayed for my office, my home, and for Joe, but at least I made time to take this photo and since then I've had it hanging on my office Wall Joe one of my favorite words is that's when that answered, every question that you asked me, which I couldn't you know eloquently, please what thanks Joe you know why you laugh when people say that it makes this shit
can I make they showed up. That makes sense, it makes sense. So it's so close. The Charles River makes sense. Yeah right, I'm going a mile away right. Unbelievable Fenway Park is about a mile away from the river I'd, say a rap silly right, yeah, because there is because it becomes ground down by the old Sears Roebuck, still there's a part of it. That goes through there too. Amazing right, that's crazy! That is crazy. Wow capital of lot of we end there. Yeah The case is already the best majalah. Thank you always a pleasure. It's nice to play my my my pleasure to begin that time. You're in town, maybe we'll check my machine, maybe I'll, look as good get that grab a truck by everybody. Thank thank you nobody for tune into the show and thank you to our sponsors. Thank you to movement dope watch
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Transcript generated on 2019-10-09.