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He's an artist is a musician and is also a kickboxing champion. He. The Bela tour featherweight champion absolutely where the best cake boxes on earth, but to me more, is it do so? really interesting and unique human being, and we barely talked about fighting, so we talk mostly about his life and he got pretty deep and pretty heavy and very honest, very intense, and I love it's gotta death. Please give it up for the great Kevin Ross the job will gain experience. Travelling raw Springer of gifts and benefits occurs, don't go to see rather, thank you very much for their bag or we re work on its regular people, village in our common brought a giant heavy bag filled with sand. That has away

north to underpin. I think it's about to fish in a lot of fun, getten and my carbon myself is down your preferred method for conditioning shins. For sure. For sure you know the the thing with can shape. Conditioning a lot of people. Do you know not smack themselves in the commission with bottles and cans stupid things like that? Bear you know really creating what you need to, which is our overall conditioning over a strengthening of the near the bone. All you're really doing is dead in little spots in your nerves, but that's the worst thing you do without stirring sending your bones. You deadening the nerves, but not strengthening the bone overall, and if you do that, you're gonna think your bones alot stronger than it is, but it can handle the impact so with with a sandbag your your cover. What

more surface area- and you know applying it in a realistic situation where you're you're able to throw kicks repeatedly at this thing in what you would you really want to do, is due to a degree that its causing a certain amount of pain. But you re able to do this daily with with rare, Titian, because that's how you continue to develop just like getting stronger at anything, you know get it doesn't happen overnight, yet it just do this every day, just at the end of it. Session, knock out a few kicks, and then again, tomorrow and again, the next day in you, slowly and steadily. Are they able to go harder and harder and then and then develop the strength and conditioning in your shins So the idea is that you're, making like his little time, micro, fractures right for sure and yet said you want to be able to cover a good. Surface area, so you're had hidden it. All kind of that wants is, as opposed to like little spots, which is what happened to wages whack it without barriers. Somethin, like that, I'm my experiences

Can it with a bad as everybody kind of quits like here one condition motions and then they just of what the fuck? doing, and they start doing well. The thing to with with when you're able to kick like that is, you can kind of. Slowly build up you know you start a little bit lightly and develop all but stronger. You can create a little little bit of a reason in over as you get going you your brain, can kind of. App itself around it a little bit better than you stuck on harder and harder and by the end of you know your five ten minutes session you're, putting in some serious weight into that you're. Not you not noticing it as much Yet we were talking about your ear, need that you had a fracture, namely that you didn't realize you had the nets this, which we like the thing to do. We may be the most in kickboxing, and so I've only seen a few times is when someone checks to kick in there. They like snaps and half like Tyrone Spong when he fought go con sake

Anderson, so many far, Chris Wyman same thing that snap of one that than the Shin gives out like that can prevent that from this. Obviously it's one of those just break things that happens. You know clearly with those guys you can have the most conditions in the world, but you from the wrong way wrong time? They can happen in its rare, but it does happen, and it doesn't really matter how long you ve been doing this, how strong emotions are. Sometimes things just break, I wonder how many guys have little breaks and they don't know about it to prior LA la. They said: that's what happened with Anderson Anderson through a keg, and he broke it before that, like you fell some was wrong and then way through that second kick and snapped, and have that's that's. Why did that makes sense? Will widen was check and perfect, whose checking it right away top of his knee and you know that's a big thing with

I'm fighting a lot of a lot of people tend to just blindly just pick their shit up. You know, as opposed to paying attention to where it is unusual, in that it sitting just just like when you're kicking, you need to pay attention to what piece of your leg you're hitting with which Peter View Shin your checking with in the higher up on your chin. It is not the harder it's going to be in one year, South Paul versus Orthodox and throwing that inside leg kick you're you're you're, coming up words at an angle which is tends to be low on your foot or you are you're your ankle than your checking with high up by your nisi of the smallest part of your shit. Can thing with their the hardest part of somebody else's, and with that, that's just the one that tend to do that. Yeah, it's a big chin on should contact is such a brutal thing, like nothing ever wish experience at once You know just crack The funny thing is it: it doesn't matter how long you you ve done this for you, we watch these fights and assume that

They don't feel pain and then it doesn't bother them even guys with hundreds and hundreds of fights you see in the next day and the third GIMP and around pretty good here, you know we have this idea in our brains, eventually you're gonna get the point when you just don't feel pain and it doesn't bother you, but and she realised that never happens. No one is the better get that out of your head. Now, you no more time kickboxing in anything that born on bone. Is it's going to be painful in that part of the art of it? You learn how to place your kicks, better, pay attention to what you're doing in the. Of course, you you develop by your ship conditioning in that kind of thing, but it always herds he's gonna. It's such a brutally effective way to fight in it so interesting that Thailand perfected that I've always been fascinated by that like do think about entire world, its enormous world and people, been fighting in this enormous world from the beginning of time and this one island,

they said hey. I got an idea. What is a cultural thing over there? You know it's part of their upbringing. It's like baseball over here or soccer in other parts of the world, where everybody kind of does it to one extent or the other, and you know clearly, if you're doing this from the time your child particular when it's a job like it is for them over there and it's it's more than just for fun,

for fun. It's like this horror survived. This are working in the fields in any that completely changes their mentality about it. That's why, when you go there, it's like obviously the skill for sure but but the mentality, in their reasons for doing this, like it so different, it's so different yeah. They start so young and there's through their basically sent to these camps, and they start fighting like you know before there were ten years old oftentimes out of these kids. You know their their family. Send them to these these camps in that's where their raised in other raised in a Jim, to be fighters into work for the job That's really what they're doing is their working? You know they're they're they're, getting money to send back to their families and their not doing this for fun than I do now. Hobby I've always been fast by the way, the Thai spar as well, because I think it's really interesting that, given that they do

so often and their livelihood depends on it and that it is not a game they really figured out. A bunch of things was things have figured out is hit the paths hard hit by hard Sparta. Yeah yeah, there's, there's given take to everything that we do in were trying to maximize. Are learning and minimize the damage or the the the risk of injury that were taking, and we have the opposite approach here in america- was just beat the shit out of each other, and you know that's good, that's how you're going to get better, but you don't really do Philip, when you're going hard like that, you're learning how to be tough in you in an attitude damaging near you know, learning how to be in the fire like that which is important but you're not the developing in a one you when you're playing when you're practising when you're, not thinking about it injured or knocked out variable too.

Learn new imply new things and new techniques and then in practice things that you normally wouldn't like one when you're worried about getting hurt, you're only going to focus on the things that you really good at you know, you're not gonna, try these different approaches and that's what really limits a lot of our development. You know a lot of you see a lot of fighters there. Their ability can a levels off at to a certain degree and they don't they dont continually develop as their careers go on, and they also don't last very long either, because the amount of damage their their bodies in their brains are taking. You know each one of us only has a fine. I number of shots to the head. We can taken and shouts of the body we can take in. Do you want to use those in the gem or do you want to use those in the ring you known its, I think It's really about finding a good balance between that. You know in the beginning, all I did was just go crazy and spar super hard six days a week, leading all the way up to the fighting.

Stay a week. You respond hard, really yeah yeah. We got em in the smallest guy. I had to work with come up with pride, twenty pounds bigger than me and you know in a lot of ways. This helped me develop in and gain a lot of strength and confidence and and ability to take that kind of punishment. But it also did a lot of detrimental things. A lot of stupid injuries, a lot of damage and over the years I've come to develop and get more onto the tie, approach of things and then practice and playing in the mule. Finding, when the time to go hard, isn't when the time to to learn and develop is what's counterproductive in what is, and how do you make that distinction like? How do you know whence Atomic guard you down? You don't really mean everything with that. We do is a process of trial and error. You know, I think, once you, I understand that you can think clearly and apply the things you need to in the midst of that firefight watch

which you know, it is really what shuts alot of people down in the beginning. They they they can't process. The information that's happening because it's so intense in, and that is why it is important to Canada have that in have that fight like situate scenario in the Jim, but once you ve done, then you ve had the experience, and all of that I think it's so much so much more beneficial to start going towards the other direction, especially if you want to stay in this. For a good amount of time in and not take unnecessary damage for really know no purpose whatsoever. It should to me it should be the exception and not the rule. Have those hard training sessions wants and whilst achieving it working with people that you are not used to discuss in opposite when he fights you don't know

there are really doing in there and that's like working with a stranger in the gym. We we know each other so well that we tend to just work on those things in practice by, but that's how we develop and if we are doing that were really limiting ourselves is gonna be difficult to find the right balance in terms of what what Jim your training at what way training at these days, I'm down in San Diego now I move down there two years ago at the the boxing club Does that our yeah yeah sure Ocean Evans, Place Vienne Levin was: is there to arts him

surely, in the small our time here he we met almost fifteen years ago use actually the janitor at these Jim Jim had just move from Russia. Now he he owns three of women. Is this amazing, Jim owner in and business person wishes? It is just not on believing fascinating story that he has no inspirational thing in Vienna for him out and now, and I can about back between Sandy go in and out here. Gina lives out here, so I can go back and forth it now that places it's called the boxing club right yeah, but it's Mighta time, yeah, there's that other Jim out here called boxing works, which it, which is the one I turn out in torrents and same thing. It's it's a mortar german in both these genes are more time, kickboxing related. Yet there boxing. Why do they call box

works is just to get people to join. I don't really know. I don't really know why that happened or how that happened. Yet it's it's kind of ironic that both those places are seemingly boxing gems and are not what made you make the move down there, a lot of things I I'd always planned on ending up in San Diego humming. That's the one plan lava down and I've lived all over this country since I've moved all over the place. Since I was a little kid in San, Diego is just were always planned. I'd be one day. I didn't think I move down there until I was done for. Eating, but through the process of a lot of things- and you know, transitions in my life agents, candidate was the right time to go. It's the perfect bounce because it's like a city but a big city and it's got a lot of beauty like there's beauty. Four hills and of the ocean is beautiful like, but it's not that crowded. It's like it,

I shouldn't even be talking about a year and when people move there, aren't you go there. It's it's tough. The wanna be anywhere now know that the energy, that's there that the way that people are. You know you you, you have all those things that are another cities, but all everything that's pervert, and in one place it's it's very unique. In that sense, I think this on a positive aspects to the military presence. There too, because I think there's someone discipline people down. There is like a lot of health, conscious fitness, oriented and discipline people, because the factors such a giant military presence down there like to so many people that are involved in military. So many people that are involved in a military have alot of discipline, train alot our interest and martial arts in particular yeah. You know it's just. I think it flavors that community. Yet it's it's is We have a place. I love it. I love you, I don't go there. The problem is the fuckin, DR whew, that drive there

everytime. I work in San Diego. I leave here like eight in the morning I dislike, let's say five towards their nine millimeter fuck and get it out of the way you get that for our drive out the way early yeah. You know if you like for me. If I leave around ten ten thirty, I can usually get there and about two hours before trafficking, but there's this really short window of time. But if you miss, it is a rough on my friend bill vertex help down there. While his helicopter lessons, we should get some helicopters and of the allowing European around here, zone, but he takes lessons here, and so you know it just hires one and he actually flying as the co pilot, whose, like the fight, stricter, explains everything to make sure he's doing everything right here and nanny down an hour here, to get you to judge out of european health after I haven't they kind of freaked me out, they just sketchy their sketchy

if they're well maintained, like anything else, you know he took me up and one we flew over in eyes and over matters. It was crazy flying over Malibu because we did it right after the fires Always you get to see all the houses that were burnt the ground nuts man and like point doom, so this huge states reply worth. Twenty five million dollars is burnt to the fuckin ground and so many of a man now like six hundred structures, while men it's hard to wrap your brain around me the damage that was done, and then I saw this scale, which showed what the California fires are and what their australian fire. Ah my God had just left and Tom is there right now and he said they had divert his plane. He was supposed to fly in Melbourne and they deserve

Sidney because they couldn't fly through the smoke. Seventy percent of the country's governance marsh and a good percentage. Those fires were started by people. Yes, fuckin around, like thrown cigarettes into the Bush, created they said. Half a billion animals are dead, she's air. This terrible, it's insane and they said that Koala bear like this. So much of their habitats destroy their therein like grave danger. Yeah. It's me like it's like something about like eighty percent of the range has been destroyed. Crazy to cloud bears only eat like that think they only eucalyptus, trees Dolly

just kind of what it is they found what works yeah there in one thing, it's like a due to only blueberries brow the run on a blueberries. I don't think they can either the things that's like their digestive system is evolved to eat. Eucalyptus leaves here at home, it's fucked up, and when you look at the map or where the fires arts, it's crazy. It's like multiple stiffly is like if we had like multiple states like Texas, Wyoming Nevada, all on fire at the same time, that's what it's like over their yeah, it's harder up your mind. It is have you and when there's a fire here, not not close enough to really feel like their boat but around in even just them in the general area, I mean you realize how quickly they they can spread and just take over everything. Yeah, so devastating have been evacuated. Three, yeah from where I live, and this last one the houses across the street from a house burned to the ground

then, and two houses down the one those houses down on my block. Ten houses are gone. It's fucking nuts man. I want to walk the dog today and we're walking by these just empty lots for his people to live in our bright side. Nobody died. Hopefully everybody hadn't Sharon's, but its history. Its humbling, when you see it coming, is everybody's like did the firefighters doing their best there, just their dump in water to doing their best, Fire breaks in everything again, but there's nothing, they can do it so big I mean it was so big. It was just coming over the top of the mountain. He looked all the way to the left and all the way, the righteous nothing of fire, and these guys just consciously circling over and drop in watered down and doing their best. But it's like it was crazy. And there was nothing we're up. North northern California, Northern California, people died on the fucking I way they couldn't get out a way of ours, terrible though so bad

up there about five years ago, when these are going on in there just pop up everywhere in and there was some there were pretty close to the jail, and the like, watch and see where their acts they were close to. The apartments who live in big we might have to get out of here, get stitches pop all over the place and they hop from one place to be. Either with the wind and everything Henry so who'd almost burned to death, no story about him how to jump out the window barefoot burnt the fuck out of his feet. I couldn't even I was going on in his sleep and and then all suddenly is waken up what is happening in the outside the window and everything's on fire. It got to him that quickly, scary, shit, man, but it's it's that you know. That's fucked, about it, but we all have to go to like me, my neighbours and friends. My we all are picked a hotel. We in town, we all went together, but there's like us here. Camaraderie about when shit like that goes down, for everybody was happy. It's horrible,

those things gonna happen and make you realize like what is important in, and you know it's the same thing like when you when you travel, receives and go to third world countries like they seem to have a very good understanding of what life should. It is about and writing. I am everything everyone has everything everyone everyone's complaining about everything and were miserable in or were spoiled, and that's that mentality is it's it's so unfortunate. Like that, the more you have the moon more yet the complain about in forget what what is important in this life is,

where did it take something like that jar you it's? You should be able to learn from that and then carry that lesson, but that lesson is like sand in your finger at my house. How quickly, after like nine a land of eleven, are things like that? How long does it last year and in such a traumatic thing like that, you know we're like a week or two of America, let let's let's get together and wants to care and love each other and then left yeah well, I've mean to make now gi with martial arts. One of the reasons why I enjoy being around Marshall artists and why most of my friends are good percentage. My friends are marsh orders. I feel like training all the time and getting humble sport particularly, jitsu, because you can get tapped out a lot in. You

you just train and you get tapped out and you keep going so I'm getting knocked out. You know you can only get cracked in the head so many times it's boring, but you you develop this kind of humor Sadly, that is its its is ever but he can understands it and there is a feeling that sugar, Were you understand when it was so much kill you all the time I got a right LE basis. Some do is try to choke the fuckin breath audio and some scatter arm wrapped around your neck. Like the rest- of the world seems easier. You know, and I almost feel, like human beings, our engineer through through evolution. We would sort of in design to natural selection, to learn how to survive difficult things and when the difficult things don't exist, we make things that aren't difficult, difficult, very myself, very much so for me,

feel that training and martial arts and fighting and all these things. It clears the static and the noise out of your life, and it allows you to focus on the things that are important and not be so distress did by fluff, nothingness, now and even a day or two of not training. I like, I feel that stuff seeking back in it it it's. It's you know, like I dont know how everyone's not running round, shooting each other, because just a few days of not doing this and like a kill, somebody get because I allow just the stresses of nothing to get it there. They make the sound more consistent is pushed the little bit for just could induce cigarette things like allow. I don't have a voice, arrive the perfect. How much longer do you think you're gonna compete I have no idea. How would you know I'll before you this year? Oh shit, there that's the magic

You know the since the day I started you I didn't start. I was twenty three so, your story, because it is a fact story? I love a guy whose life is fucked up and then a figure something out and then becomes a role model in a lot of ways? That's what you ve done here. It's long story and I'm I'm actually in the process of running my Albert Biography right now, which abortion on pretty consistently for the last five years. Something that you know, I really was doing it. Myself and a lot of ways to have an understanding of the things that I've been through in the things that have learned and processed in acquired

today's years, which is you know in a lot of ways. It's been extremely rewarding doing all this, but it's also been in very difficult, very painful and emotional, going back through all these things that happen to me in my childhood, in my upbringing and things that I'm even to this day and still trying to process and understand a lot of panda, Where were you stay here, while your story of not starting to your twenty three and for that too? which partying yeah, so summarize listeners owes. I grew up in a lot of different moved around a lot of my parents, but a very early

me and my mother and three brothers, four brothers sisters. You know we basically lived in somebody's basement for in the beginning and we're living on welfare and bouncing around from place to place, and so much of that shut me down emotionally, and you know when I was kid from what I'm told I I mean I've ever really not much recollection of my childhood cuz. I

block so much of this out, and so it's been really difficult for me to write this book, because I don't really have many memories. I almost no memories of that time. In my life, where I felt like a child that care free choice of childhood and knows how do you know talked siblings and friends from back then in look through photo albums and slowly things are coming together, and you know that that's what a lot of this has been really therapeutic, but them. I was a fighting, always loved boxing and was very intrigue by it and martial Latino Bruce Lee was always a hero,

And but I hate violence coming up, I hated it, but I was intrigue by its at one on a really good friend of mine, how we live in Colorado for about a year or two. He would get into fights on a weekly basis in school, and I was fascinated by it like that, like you're so brave, and I felt like such like a week, I was very allowed, like weakness to turn to overtake. Me throughout the the events of my life, and I was very shy, didn't talk, you know what I was always athletic and that kind of thing, but but as far as confrontation, in that I'd, like it just shut me down, and then I didn't like it upset me a lot, and you know what people would be angry with me and So if I had to this strange dynamic where I was drawn to fighting- and I was drawn to violence in one way, but if I also hated it a lot and was scared by it, but

many years ago. I thought about. I was like I'll, maybe I'll try boxing one day and I'll be really cool, and I was fascinated watching two people in the ring and then all these people are watching in there they're with each other, regardless of their skill level. And then you know what just thinking about what would it must be like in there to do and on a fascinated me, but it. But I again, like I said: oh, I love martial arts, so I want to be a kick people elbow people and the people, and I never saw any fighting that was like that. You know, as I was coming over mean you'd see tat condone karate in

not appoint sparring in that kind of thing and forms, and you know even that I thought it was fascinating, but our fight like boxers did- and I just never saw anything like that in one day- ninety four, this move to Vegas. I was watching ESPN like two in the morning, and these have tie fights on once in a while in this fight came on this next Friday, scam would terrify between so and so, and when that started, I was immediately hooked. It hit something in me, they're just like. Let me I'll fire like this is everything that I've been looking for. This is something so different in it just spoke to

soul and in fascinated me, in a SEC, I am ever going to do this. That's going to be at it's going to be more Thai, but you know for various reasons. It scared me one. I didn't know how I'd be able to afford it, and I might even if my parents would even let me in you know, coming up the way I did. I was partying and drinking all the time, even at that mean like twelve years old, holy shit, yeah and by the time I was probably eighteen those physically dependent alcoholic. I had a drink every day in order to keep my nerves. Some shaking my on my hands, wouldn't would would would tremor how much we drinking a lot Allah every day how drink every day

all day throughout the day, low bear night I'll just be pound and Fortys FARC constantly in in that's all. That's all that I did that's all me. My friends. Did you just drink, we drink everyday and is heard Cotonou initiative after starting with Iceland put. What did it As I said, I learned about it in ninety four over the years every once in a while. I see a fight and about how I want to do this so bad, in ninety eight I actually started calling around gyms in Vegas. I was like only if I'm going to find a place to do

Listen for meals on other things are. If I'm gonna do it. I want you right now. I want to do it to fight and if I'm gonna do to fight him, what is the fastest way to get there? It was like I need to take one on one lessons I need to. I wanted to learn from a tie. You know, and that was not to say that, like Americans or anybody else, can't can't teacher, but as I guess, if you're gonna learn, might learn from this, Orson the only place in Vegas that taught my tie. One of the only place that even to maintain the implicit had time structures was master Tories, Jim, and how the jam went down and talk to the instructors in He let me know how expensive is gonna be, as is now Y know, I'm real do sin in for me? I also knew that if I am gonna go after this, I'm gonna need to stop drinking. Stop partying completely alter my entire exists.

Since I'm private lose all my friends every began to laugh at me. I didn't even know how serious I took myself. You know like I laugh at me when I say this. You know like it's in. If you knew me back then need bridle, after you were here. We really mean you gonna fight a stupid as This thing I could ever think of, and one of my best friends MO here for whatever reason this one night, we were up in the roof drinking and smoking weed, and he we got to talking just about life and he was actually born with a heart defect. I can't remember the exact name of the disease that he had be used in a hospital social life use again. I need to get a hard transplant and we're doing do the life like them. I gives ask me what

what I want to do when I got to the moon and back what do you mean? What I want to do with my life and then he's like well, I always wanted to fight and expecting him to laugh at me about this. Usually, but why don't you new. I told him why your old already I was eighteen at the time I've already felt ancient than you. I told him reasons than all my fears and doubts, and in all these things he's, like you know, I'm in these like. If anybody can do it, you can cuz. I got to think you should, and I really thought I was stuck with me. Maybe a cannon, and in that moments you know, I felt very motivated and wanted to do it, but by Germany are continuing to drink. In all these things, I just put it suppressed it into the back of my mind and then about a year later, He was in the hospital and

he needed to get heart transplant. They basically use. Basically at that point was like you're going to be here until you get one or you're going to die, and you know I don't think any of us realized how serious it was, or maybe we just didn't want to. He ended up passing away while he was. For the transplant and that just obviously devastated me to no end and threw that knife through my drunk and coping outside I'm going to do this, I'm going to go after this dream. You know my friend. He didn't even get a chance to fail at a dream and I'm too scared to even try. For no reason, just out of fear that much literally my only reason not to do this other than you know, financial and all those other surface things, but it really just boil down to fear- and I was like you know what I'm going to do- I'm going to go after

for him. You know he didn't get a chance to live, live for the both of us, but you know, fortunately, his his death sent me even harder down that downward spiral of alcohol and depression. Three years later, I just had a realization one day ass. If he was still alive, he beat the fuck out of me from wasting my life I've been wasting, life for twenty one years, because I afraid you I'm afraid, I'm too afraid to fail too afraid of Ali stupid reasons that that all of us give out cells in order to make ourselves feel better about not going after things, but really there just that they just add there just excuses they're, just things that make you feel better and their bullshit they're all bullshit. Almost every excuse we have is total. Bullshit is there's people with those excuse,

says, and with all those reasons and more and they're able, then they do it. What is your excuse and adjust it just smack me in the face one day- and I I was at that point when I could not ignore it any longer, and this was going into two thousand and three, so I o psych made it my new year's resolution to do this and you know one night. I was sitting down with my father and we have these to get into these long talks with me cuz. I was always very quiet and you'd like to take me off to the side and his way to kinda Talk to me and get to know me better news like so once you tell me Then you ve never told anybody like what came here.

Like I killed somebody when I was little and I might like racking my brain. What I could possibly tell him into you know that that kept replaying in my mind that you want to fight you in a fight and fight and very like, while he's like, I want to fight one day. I want to fight You gonna fight. I told him in his well. Why don't you- and I told Molly's reasons he's like while I cannot help you with all your fears and doubts in this, but look I'll make a deal with you. Few quit drinking and dedicate yourself to this I'll. Take care of every other financial things in order to let you do is said we are dealing with these points, Dallas drinking a forty eight times.

What about that drink in your hand? Well, I was going to start tomorrow, so I don't know. Maybe I could finish this right, but you know I understood even at that age like can't put things off like that is like if you're serious about it, you do it now the rest of forty and the stinky had in there and today later. I got into the gym and was it hard to wean yourself off out, although if you are physically dependent, it was. It was both extremely difficult. Yet. I was so focused on his goal that none of those I I had to overcome so much, not just the fiscal defence of the unethical, but but my lifestyle, and not against change so many things, but I've been putting this

all for so long that I knew there was. There was no time for me to go to waste. You know I was so focused on this to like once I made that switch in my mind, like I'm, going to go after this and there's nothing that's going to stop. In I've wasted so many years already that everything I'm doing this is gonna, be playing catch up. You know that There is no way for me to get too like I'd. Look at you know that, like sand, guys guys like that, I'm never going to get there. So everything that I do has to be too get me closer to this goal and I can't allow you know my fist. Dependency or my doubts, or any of these things slow,

me down, because everything I'm doing enough to play catch up, you know and having that that focus allowed me to overcome all of those those physical and emotional and mental challenges. And of course that's not to say it was easy, was extremely difficult is extremely difficult, but it was you got two choices. You know you can you can allow these things to slow, down and hinder you and weaken you or you can say, I'm gonna go forward anyway. Doesn't matter how afraid I am it doesn't matter. How heard I am doesn't I'm tired, I am this is what I want and I'm gonna put everything that I haven't to this or that way, when I'm done, when my oh, my life is over. When I can't do this anymore, I can look back and have no regrets that I didn't allow these things

slow me down. I didn't allow the excuses that we all have hinder me. Keep me from doing this you know, because one day we're going to wake up and realize we could have gone after these things and we didn't because of x Y really, but really those things aren't arts anything. Do you stop and think about those moments when you first started this cuz a profound Life shift to go from being you guys, gonna aimless imparting a lot, but knowing that you should do something with your life to finally doing something like what was it like when you finally started training? What what did it feel like when you actually for, because you hadn't had you die

anything. I fled before that in almost always always asked lady. My whole life, as always, is really good. At sports I hated, I hated the team aspect of things despised being on a team of any kind of a love plain sports for them, for the love of it. You know, but any time I was on like a team I would just hated. I despise didn't you by the time I was like, I think, twelve. I completely turn my back on anything team related because I felt to me, fella get ruined all the beautiful things about the physicality of a vessel attics. You know put this this. This one

hindered me in a lot of ways you know and having to rely on other people. You know it's always a big. Do you know it's like it doesn't matter how hard I work, because this person might not have worked at all, and you know that's why I'm so drawn to fighting, because it's it's, even though you do have a team. Of course. It really is everything is on you, the good in the bad there's, nothing you can put. You can point to all these other things, but it's just you so yeah? I think back, and I looked back to that time and what was the first day work. It was do you remember yeah yeah? I do it was so ice

art it out just doing private lessons. I didn't even start doing classes until may be six months to a year saws, Ogden Private lessons on a daily basis, my trainer master channels, one of Tatties original instructors. He had me in the genetic six. A m is men, so this January, in Vegas, which is brutally called much knowledge Not all people realise and their Jim had no heat, but all the windows were like broken. So there's no insulation in thing and I was. I was just ass. I was so excited so nervous and you know say I want to do. Do well in performing everything was just everything was so knew that I didn't really I don't really have a lot. I couldn't even really process it, so that wasn't a lot of

swimming really a lot of thought that was going through it. I was just I was just excited. I was just six constantly excited and motivated and wanted to. My whole goal was to fight. I want to fight, even if it's only one time so everything I did was with that mentality. I like, I want to get better to get better went. Do everything I can at every moment- and I put every ounce of myself into every second of the day- was geared to words this, he knows singularly focused on this goal, can remember the first day yeah. I remember the first day of four:

work, and yet how a man is the first, the first day he has me up in the ring. I must have been maybe the second or third day, because there is another as other people there, that maybe they were just hitting the bag and stuff. So there there was a couple of other pro fighters. There are other they are providers. I was nobody and I'm up in the ring, and so this day one is shut up box. I've never done anything fighting related like what do you mean? I don't know what that is. You know what I'm saying like. What do you mean shadow box so, like sir How much of my everything in my career has been like thrown into the deep end? Can you swim kind of thing in like this forced learning curve, and I didn't get babied into anything? You know it's like

I shot a box go ahead and everyone all these fighters like staring at me. Watch me ill in word, will ever know. Is it it was. It was traumatic in a lot of ways but having to confront that in face that particularly me, cuz, I'm a nap very shy Person presented a doesn't speak ever. Buddy I mean even now you I'm still very quiet, but if you knew me back, then I was basically a mute, No interaction with especially strangers and if I didn't know, and even the ones that I do it's a barely even communicate with all of this was all foreign to me. This is like an alternate universe that I was in and How is it was so scary, but it was like you do a choice. I get up there and do it or get the fuck out of here. You know what I mean so there wasn't there wasn't time. For me to really think,

about it or like even be really nervous about. Do it, shadow boxing and in and this instructor barely spot English is not like. I can like psych hey well, I don't really know what I'm doing and then maybe you can show me something like a tire pro just like just do it, I'm not going to tell you how I'm not going to explain the steps just go pick the bag or or hit it just do it and yeah it was. It was scary, but then, once you got some, Bantam once had a couple of weeks under belgian and started becoming a real normal part of your life. Was that feeling will you realize, like hey, I'm fuckin actually doing this way. It's this actually happening. Every day. Every day I was taken significant Jones. I mean as a set of always been naturally Ethel Attic, so

picking us up like quick, really quick, I mean, even within a few weeks, people thought I'd been doing it for years. You know what a lot of that you know does come from my physicality, but but my drive to do it and then turn it to to have my sights set so high that you know I was taking these quantum leaps. Every single, so over over the weeks in over the months you know adjust it really felt like a like our Emma among tracking, know, I'm I'm on the path I should be on I'm going to be amazing at this. You know this is great, I'm I'm natural at this. They know I'm going to be a champion. One name just be crushing people and everything

everything was pointing in that direction. You know with my my development in you know, started eventually going into the classes and sparring in all those kinds of things and down. You know is always like. When do I get to fight? When do I get to fight? When do I get to fight, and I think it was nine months in I finally got I got fight. This is it this is. This is my moment, you know I'm going to go out there and you know what I'm going to crush this dude and then I'm going to be. You know on my way to the big time, not that they're. Even you know back then that there's no big time there was no. This wasn't this was before. Youtube visit before anyone even knew what more time was you know yet tell everybody you did kickboxing. Basically, would you just crushed my saw every time every time they well, it's like kickboxing engine out for more time, people to have to say that is its devastating. It's like someone, somebody wild it's like karate

no disrespect to any of these other arts, but but to say that it's that, in order to help people the most the time, I would just say, yeah yeah yeah, it's like you're, posing, instead of having to explain to them what it is down? Yes, oh nine months in, the there's gonna be a fight in SALT Lake City, you, tar and a bunch of the other people. The gym were fighting as well and we're all gonna go up there and compete. Is this an amateur five year, headgear, no, yes headgear, but in other funding was we had headgear but we didn't have shipyards. We had aid and gloves, and we need the head, which was trip so anyway. So what so and like oh yeah, greatly the fight in and also excited in my pops into

Gina and we we drove up there and you know, like I said I really felt like I was on my way, but when we got there, the guy that I was originally supposed to fight you backed out or it's just that he was closer and wait till somebody else. You know when I was kind of thing back, then we would just show up at places and be like you got to fight for me or don't you and they didn't I was devastated devastated at all this work, I'm so ready, and now I don't have a fight, and you know my turns hecklers. Is there somebody else yet and so that the promoter you know was calling around come around and he's like? Well, there's one guy, that's going to take it, but he always you by twenty LB and he's had about thirty fights already

Let's do it. I don't give a fuk man I was like. I didn't do all this for nothing. You know what I'm saying, and you know again that, like that was just our mentality of the that we came up in the people that we came up under. Was you fight any time where anyone any style any weight. It doesn't matter and so yeah I didn't. Even I didn't even really think about it. As far as like that goes, you know, so I can fight the fucking awesome man and how I felt I felt confident in a way, but it's also that you have no idea what you really doing like you can train your whole life. But if you ve never fought you don't know anything anything. You have no concept. What it's like.

To be in there. You give the hardest sparring in the world with a complete stranger in its night and day, between a real fight in sparring, and so it's like yeah, you you, you want to feel confident going in there, but you have no concept of of what it is so thrilled, just fake its fate, confidence and down. I got frightened crush man, so I got there and I in I've, no concept of like pacing myself saw dislike, unlike sprinting at the sky, and in like thirty seconds I was done. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't think I could barely even see felt like I felt like I was under water and it was it was. It was the worst thing in the world cuz, nothing. This guy was doing with hurting me, and have you had made across all in all I want to do is to say it is

bother me this isn't hurting. May I wanted, I tell everybody, us isn't hurting me night. I can't breathe, like all, I'm really trying to do not pass out right now and- and I like physically, I can do anything but but I was able to last for while do a couple decent things in their, but but around huges battering battery me me me in the face- and you know you just he just kept clincher me needing the piss out of me, and there is nothing I can do and they finally stopped it in the third round

our devastated now devastating, I remember walking like ourselves walking back to the locker room. I ruining the crowd was like cheering for me. Like olives, awesome man like like a job good job. What is your own? These people like that wasn't good, though so terrible those terrible and down ass. I lay in the back and Billina replace my opponent comes in music. Do that was your first fight again man. I hate to see you in like a year to rethink, though those amazing that really really stuck with me know that that one that he said that also just the the impact I saw that you could have on people that that it's not necessarily about whether you win or lose it at its. What you're, showing their it's the hard that you show. It's the the spirit that you show, and you know I had like a day or two when I was like. Maybe this just isn't for me know, I thought I thought that this was going to be so good at this. I thought that it was just going to like skyrocket

top and I get crush man. I didn't even make it out of the fight like. Maybe this is for me, but I was forced to face that day. One like do you want to do this, regardless of how good you are welcome, this of you win. If you, if you can't win- and maybe you can't be the best in the world, do you still want to do this yeah fuck? Do I love this so much and me having to face that so early on was was was extremely significant. I sought so many people I trained with, would go on these undefeated streaks back ten. Fifth,

twenty five, but inevitably you will lose and if you haven't had to confront that early on, eventually you do most of those people never fought again or you're, just like fresh thyme mentally, where they weren't able to overcome it. But I had to do with it the first day in overcoming be like you know what that doesn't matter, I'm going to bust my ass in gym make sure that never happens again and I went on to win like one thousand nine hundred and twenty fights in a row from there, and you know that was a really significant moment in my career, where I had to confront the reality of this, and you know that so much of a fighting is is as a perfect metaphor for.

Four things in life like if you really want something, you can't always focus on what the results are ordering the immediate results like winning and losing an all of these things are so much of that is just on the surface ego level of things and when you break it all down like what is your, why are you doing I'm doing this cuz? I love it. I'm doing this to improve myself and doing this, because it's what keeps me healthy, mentally, physically, spiritually and all things and that's the most important thing in yes, it was an extreme motivator to be better, and you know not to let that have happened to me again, button You know really really made things clear to me early on, like what's important here, also just to get

over that it. So it's so psychologically important that you, like you, were saying you just kept getting sort of talk to the walls. Everything you did was difficult. Almost symbolic of your journey. That you were forced to fight someone who had thirty five and twenty pounds heavier when he had no experience that the trusting the process Is you really only trust the process if it's difficult, You know that whole expression trust a price worth you're fucking everybody out what you mean, trust a process you're out there just flock everybody up course on trust and put on the man right. But when you get your ass handed to you and then you have to rebuild, and you have to realise well, there's a There is a variables in here. You are encountering the variables and speed in in aggressiveness and styles and in trickery.

Some people are better than others figuring you out in some people have a style, its tailor made to defeat your style and its good. When that does happen, and not just to trust the process, but to appreciate that Ernie and sometimes people they just want success, while the odds Of course, we all want noise want things to be good, it's it's kind of that same entirely of old, like you want to give your kids, would you never had, but a lot of Would you do that you end up with a spoiled brat, who has now set of work ethic and really takes in Europe, hindering them, even more so than than you work, as you add do like confront all these things thrive, Menachem salmon? It's it's unfortunate that so many things that you would think would help us really hurt us an end, and it needs to be difficult and needs to be a struggle. And of course you want

help along the way but thought the harder? You have to work that in the long run, the stronger you're gonna be the better you're gonna, be the more independent you're gonna, be the more self sufficient you're going to be. In all of these things are you gonna? Better use of waterways is like. Maybe I should make my kids like hell and then Rather, the this can be an entrepreneur and he's gonna change the world. I don't know yes, it's hard, you know, have children, it's it's tricky. I think I don't want to have a hard life, but you do that one of the most difficult things to his work on our own journey and what's beneficial for one is detrimental to somebody else it's good to have. Advice is good to have somebody that believes in you, but that, necessarily going to help you just because sometimes that might end up hurting you you know having and will I do believe in you in telling

how great you are, and you know opening doors for you and in all these things you know, and in many ways those things can be extremely detrimental and you don't you don't develop the things that you inevitably will need in the long run and there's no there's no one way to get anywhere. You know it's, it's there's this so complex in there. So many variations of things that that fit that apply to success in anything. I have one favorite day in the weather, in LOS Angeles, to whether in LOS Angeles is perfect right, sir, so often it's like eighty degrees and sunny it's like ninety percent in time. Eighty degrees and sunny me and my friend Brian and my friend, Steve Rinella. We we film this television show called mediator, went on a hunting trip and prince of Wales Island in Alaska where's, the rainiest part North America, it's so fuckin rainy, you, you think you're going

stay dry and your tent, but there's no such thing as dry Lake IDA, and I realize this one of the first nights I had to get up take a piss in the middle of night and I had a headlamp and I turn my headlamp on and inside my tent was like it was green, because it was so much there was missed. It was moisture like so much moisture that turning on it Headlamp was like you, you really doing it. In fact, everything was wet. My sleeping bag was where my clothes were wet and I was like. Oh, you go get dry, there's no dry. We had one day we had a fire one day we figured out. I start a fire actually using Fredo's is approach, if you're pregnant Fredo's are made with some fucking crazy? toxic, Greece, that they work grain as lighter fuel like if you like them, they stay lit for long time, and they were like taking like the inn side of logs and using that word, and would that was like, maybe under the

In other words, we didn't get as where we slowly put a fire together. Anyway, I was there for six seven days we got back to allay and it was eighty and sunny and the sea. Feeling that saw nose like this the same son, I always experience, but it's always just not now it's normal snow deal just California, whether another day in Paradise, but not that day that deals fuck. This is amazing. I was driving on the street. My face felt good, like everything it felt good, and I called my friend Steve about dude. I've never been happier like this is like the happiest day. I've ever experienced and I think it's because we were suffering in in just cause old and rain for seven days Geneva that the other. What does it mean? just have these goddamn sunny days. You, like everybody out here

California despoiled. They will take the if everybody's winning nobody's winning rises in no risk losing. So if you don't have the good and the bad, you don't even understand you can appreciate the good or or what the bed can be helpful things that it does, and now we don't want that boy. But those are the things that help you grow Those are the things I did that that we inevitably need in all I had to. I don't hate you, because I want to do this hand grenade at you to see what you wanna do that here by term I then thinking about this a lot lately and then you know wanting to communicate my store in these things. That have happened to me and then this opportunity came up in December to do it to reach a lot of people into there's. That quote, that says, be the person that you needed when you were younger you knowing and Gina, has that

Why it's stairs me in the face every day- and I realise that I, I am the person that I needed when I was younger. If somebody would have opened up their mouth, and let me know that I wasn't alone and that that I wasn't so isolated and so in the summer horrible things that we all deal with is because we feel isolation. We dont think anyone crunch stand and we dont think that anyone else's going through these things in and if we did just that knowledge is not being alone, would be so significant. But when I was fourteen years old, I was molested by my stepmother, and this went on for well over a year close the two years, and it was obviously detrimental to me in these these. These are things that I'm just now finally starting to be able to understand it.

Didn't realize? Like what happened to me in and realise how young I was at the time you know when I meet of a fourteen year old kid you're, fucking baby, your baby, you, you know it's like when we think about ourselves when we were younger, like at least myself and like I still feel the same, I did when I was younger. I was just a little. You know what I mean But you don't really understand how little you were until you have like a little twelve. Fourteen year old, kids standing next to you, you look like you, don't even have to happen like thinking about how so I started to said one in six males are abused by the time, their eighteen, which means Every one of us pry know somebody that this has happened to anyone to think how you

devastating, it is to women, but but but to manage its it's, it's such a different thing is you're. Almost it's on was viewed spit war and when it happens from a woman, you know it's almost viewed as like a good thing. Yeah, like its apposite, they like ouch, that was to happen to me when I was a kid I want. We'll be molested

and you know we're not able to really understand it and understand the damage that it that it does and end in I I I I if I wouldn't have felt so alone and so isolated at the time I in I don't necessarily Noah things would have changed, but I definitely would have wouldn't have felt so alone. You know when I felt like there's nobody in the world that could possibly understand this. There's nobody there and who can I talk to you about this in all alike? I can't talk to my friends, the cop. My friends knew they thought it was cool shit ever know they like. I want that that bad? What was your stepmom too, which is too it was. It was so confusing you, noise, always as very conflicted by you know, like I couldn't

understand it at all and then to have this person like. Many mentally, manipulating me making making like our it's. Not a big deal talk it's almost like it's a good thing. You know like it's like, there's nothing wrong. You know it's it's in on a stranger and in this area, even prior to that. As I said, a surgical arouse twelve, but but this really just derailed me so much and made me internalize and put up these barriers and walls around mean and things that I like a ceremony Raymond Disney in at this age, starting to understand, like the negative habits that this created me off of distrust enough.

Negativity enough of enough of you know how and be having to be alone and not trust people. Somebody things like that at no like genus, the only person that I've ever talked to in depth. About this I mean my couple: people in my family know, and almost none of my friends and I've never spoken to this to anybody I I I I try to go to a therapist and an innate in talk about this, but I saw her realizing like this therapist is getting more out of this are our interaction than than I am my keys liquor overall a person than needs hush self confidence. Serve like allergies and like who can I can talk to you about this? you know, maybe maybe I can talk to anybody, but I I am in a position to where I can reach out and let other people that know that they are not the only ones going through this in.

That has been weighing on me so much lately, especially over the last few years. No MIKE, you are in a position to be able, even if you helps one person, but you can you just don't know. How to make well, I could write about it or I could do like a video blogger, something that happened. Thinking about this a lot lately my how the way, how can I do listen like should I do this, like I don't know, if that's like a good thing like psychologists or someone that can like help with this, and I just felt like- I need to express this and and and and communicate this and then maybe you can do some good for even one.

If I didn't I that would harm me forever. I out I had an experience when I was thirteen with a girl who lived upstream, whose twenty one a couple times but is very different than your experience. It was enough, if ashamed to say it is kind of fun. You know it's. There was different. It was. I couldn't believe it is very weird. You, but it definitely like Conor screwed up my idea of what boy a girl interaction was, I didn't, go from the lake thirteen year olds

Certainly like you want to kiss load. You know too, you know this girl grab and my deck corner. Tits ouch was a woman in oceans, twenty one and it didn't it didn't hurt me like your story, like your story hurts like it sounds like you were betrayed and you are yours and also that the fact that was your stepmom me with me. It was like what the fuck was that all about, and I don't I don't. I didn't tell anybody, but in tell anybody, fairylike, fuckin YE years and years later, upright and tell anyone till I was in my twenties, and I think I probably told a girlfriend when I was in my twenties and she was like when it was first time you revolt arouse like well, because that was really The first time I had ever fool around with anyone was: is twenty one year old woman I went up, It was the same thing for me and I I I didn't even kiss a girl. Until is, I don't know one thousand two hundred and thirteen, like

late layer cause? I was such a shy persons. I went from just kissing too that there was no one between things, same with me? I think everything our kissed a thing. I kissed her yeah. I think she was the first person I kissed her and then in here to just have your innocence ripped away like that and to be thrust into this adult thing in obviously, with the situation was not much worse. It being you know my step moment it being being molested and you know it it. It's such a different thing, then a woman are being rate forcefully, raped or way different. Now, but psychologically and emotionally you know it's it's it's its devastating. It is if it is obviously then you're learning with hers. Well, yeah no sets the whole thing's terrible in you

it went on for a year longer near, is probably close to two year. How did it stop? I stopped it actually know this was. This was something you know I never I just. I never felt right about this. I was very conflicted by it. You know knows. I definitely isn't a good thing. I can only I definitely. I didn't understand how bad over thing it was. You know again, she's very manipulative, and then you know anytime, I would kind of bring that subject of the key. I don't think this is okay. You know this is just feels wrong and she find this way to rationalize it or make it okay- and you know best time went on like I just like this is bad. Probably thirty, yelling thirties, you know now that was another thing I once I got at that age.

Then I saw a fourteen year old boy like I didn't even I couldn't even conceptualize how twisted this person was. Until I got that age, my hovel kid you, how could you look at it baby, a child and and do that? How could you that you know the expression hurt people heard people, yeah, Amino N, n n Fortunately, a lie. Out of that, for me is helps you like rationalize it and make it back. Oh well, you know she's been, here you, my father, you and after you found out lucky kept this lady around four, while real yeah after he found out I mean they. They they gonna split up in divorce, but but they the kind of work together still in and now he kept around four. For quite some time- and you know, that alone was extremely damaging to me and portrayal such a betrayal in such such

traumatic thing that I didn't even really understand. How damaging that was after the fact, until really till recently now, because I myself would rationalize it. Well, you know he didn't like night it asshole, unlike centre on like she was an alcoholic to me. Now you know is a guy. You know just trying to make this horrible situation like ok for all of us, and you know I didn't really think about like I've fucked up, he was the whole situation in like how how much more damaging it was in the long run to me by not having my father, protect me like if MIKE this happen to my child, I would fucking murder a woman that did this You know I certainly wouldn't keep around. You know- and I said,

really wouldn't like just handle it handle at the way that he did. You know that was that was almost a magnified, the damage that much more so because of the way that it was handled you know into not have that cannot be taken care of by adults by not be taken care of by my father by the people around me that were supposed to love me and take care of me in, and they did the exact opposite, like they ve fucked fact, my world up, you Know- and I I put band aids of alcohol on it. My whole life, you know I'm in it and I understand like why. I why I did that and then why it was. I mean I really was trying to kill myself. Really I mean when you look at it, that's what I was doing. I was just doing a long process of it. You know- and that's that's that's what we do. It's like we

I want to take the gun and kill ourselves, but I'm going to. I don't want to really live and I want to win like I want to check out of this place sooner, the better So I'm going to do everything in my power to make it happen, and that way I can't say I killed myself, but I was killing myself everyday and putting myself in situations that were extremely dangerous and detrimental and in damaging and that's what I was doing and didn't didn't you know. Half of my life was, as I was just destroyed, and you know I'm trying to use this second part of my life to make up for that make up for the damage that was done in into try to turn a horrible situation in a negative situation, something that I could easily point to it

Allow destroy my life, which is what I was doing in trying to do the opposite, and you know it again with it that the fight approach, like you have a ass, you of a horrible thing happen. We have an injury. What are you gonna do with it? Are you gonna? Let it destroy you and break you never do this again and then be depressing. Bitching complain and wine about it. We must say yes, shit things happen to always fucked up things happen, and we all have the excuse to Let it destroy our lives and to use it to make ourselves feel better about drinking and drugs and then just being an asshole, and you know like we all have reasons to be dicks, and we all have reasons to you know, take it out on other people, but that doesn't mean that you should Does it mean that you don't still have a choice? It's that victim mentality, and this is something that I I just

started understand, because you know that that term victim a town like a well I'm a fucking victim, but what VIC mentality really is his feeling, like you, don't have a role to play from that point. Yeah. You might not have been able to control these terrible things that have happened to you, but you do have control over what you do from there. You have control over whether you use that to go into a more positive, lighter use that to to drastically damage you in end. Be this burden that you carry most. Sometimes I think when someone like you goes through something like this. And comes out on the other end. What you can do by talking about this

set a path for so many people to understand that you know someone looks at you deceive fighting on television and they they think they see you on the internet and the successful my tie fighter. You look coolly, others beautiful girlfriend everything seems so positive. You know when you're a young kid in your life is shit like mine was clearly like yours. Was you you look at these people like there's nothing like you they're aliens. There there's some different thing: they there there there it's the world's opened up to them so easily and their better than you. When some one hears you talk about your experience, the alcoholism, the abuse, the isolation, the fee like a loser in. The things that are so relating both to so many people. When you can talk about this, you can.

You you're you're, setting a map that other people can follow and This is something that so important in culture and inhuman. These were all part of some strange evolution of of the human race and the things that our grandparents went through were likely. I'm fucking horrific things, their grandparents war went through or probably magnet. Foods? Worse- and this is just how human beings have gone from being monkeys being what we are now and it's happening very rapidly and one things that accelerates this understood ending of consequences and of the ability to rise the occasion and overcome obstacles and to be able to use adversity as a tool to better yourself is someone like What you doing right now is very, very beneficial to so many people. Millions of people listening to this right now

and so many of them this is gonna, resonate with them, they're, gonna, say This guy, who is this fucking bad ass, kicked box or might sees me might be dude whose it's, like you know, like people admire you and to hear that This is so it's so powerful a man. I'm so glad you said it, I'm so glad you talked all of it from the beginning. Your earlier struggles to this, because this is medicine for people There's a lot of people at a hearing this right now and they go, and I can do it too. I can do it too. That's that's always been a motivational thing for me to try to be honest with the the is that I deal with the ups and the downs in Mendon to to show my losses to show my injuries to show to be vocal about the doubts that I have that

I still have that will deal with. You know it's it's easy to look at these people in the spotlight milk. They don't do with fear. They don't do with pain. They Ratu with doubts. They don't do with feeling like their inadequate. I think our animals, a clever some of you- are talking about the impasse, ass, their syndrome yeah like yeah, like it, doesn't matter how, ever gone away. You knew you learn how to handle them better in you learn you stick strengthened by them, but but they don't necessarily disappear in an emerald large sums that they they can get worse over the years, because now you're now Europe's position where your expected to be a certain way you people have people have expectations of you. You know you you're you're supposed to be this super human being or exposed to big stream. The confidentiality supposed to only put on a plus performances and you're not allowed to fail you're not allowed to be.

To handle them better in you learn you strengthened by them, but but they don't necessarily disappear in an animal at times of the day they can get worse over the years, because now you're now your position where you are expected to be a certain way. People have people, have expectations of you. You know you you're you're supposed to be this super human being or exposed to be extremely confident are exposed to only put on a plus performances and you're not allowed to fail you're not allowed to be human anymore and down the when weaken, humanised these things and in London it lets people realise that they can do to ya over there we're not we're not necessarily made up of anything different than anybody else. You know we ve just gone through a process of learning in developing diving off

of cliffs that we didn't know where they were going and yeah. That's that's what we all have to do. You know like the people in these spotlights they're, they're, just human beings and the more you that you you meet them in and read about their stories and units. Liver. Reading autobiographies like cheese like that things, these people have Adobe com, they weren't handed anything if it more than anything, it was more devastate. In detrimental. They ve had overcome more than you could possibly imagine in it wasn't just given to them. They headed work and strive and struggling fail. Fail over and over and over and over and over and over and over again until they got to where they got to instil. Do they still do they still fail constantly? We all feel constantly now well failure- is a gift ways that switch you understand it like you can view these losses, or these things that happen or the struggles

You know I always do the mists challenges feel like. Are you gonna quit? Are you gonna give up? I was you like when I'm tired in the ringer and on a worker like you, won't quit fuck you and you know I do that that that that that voice in your head. You know that that that that devil that's moving over your shoulders. I can quit your failures in my you know what fuck you I'm like waiting, I'm never going to quit, never going to stop and there's nothing. You can do so. Keep talk. But I'm going forward is their time. Will you ever get past that any understand that you never gonna quit instead, just concentrate on the task at hand, or do you think that that voice that year,

duking it out with that. You take that motherfucker to the grave. You definitely take it to the grave you. I think we feel like we get farther away from it and we get stronger and we get more confident, but it never gets farther. You never get farther away from it. You know like it like II, compare my alcoholism, is like I could go ten years without ever drinking again, but all it takes is one bad day. We are call one bad day doing in the worst situations ever and that's why it's so important to know you look at people on the streets and things like that. But, like you know easy that can happen. How many bad days are bad situations? Would it take turn a successful person into that? Not a lot- and I were all- is balancing on this very delicate thing that

You know it seems like we're all strong and save him all well when the power goes out- and you know that the world gonna go to hell like that. We just pretend like it's not right, that's how we get through the day. So we like to your point, is I don't think, wherever any farther away from those things that held us back before we get longer. We learn how to process them and we we we understand it more, and we understand that the series of things that we need that will take down that road or did us farther away from it, but it, but it's just right there and no matter how much we learn and develop. I think it. Sometimes it makes it even more scarier like the high you, you get the father, you have to fall and end its the more you can be aware of that. That you're never gonna get farther away from. You always need to be diligent that you always need to do

things that are going to steer you in a more positive way. I think that that is like the goal to two, not falling back on that that I think the worst thing that we can do is have this belief that were passed it. Never going to happen again. I'm not an alcoholic anymore. I'm not a drug addict anymore, I'm not depressed anymore. That's what that's! What helped me is is I I did think one day I would be so far away from a pedo would never be a thought any more bite, but by knowing that it's always right there. That keeps me sharp. You know it's like that that that you need that thing to keep you at your best, or else we start to get lazy. It's that that that same concept of having people that push you in the GM or life or or etc. If you dont have somebody pushing You can only ever push yourself so hard. You might think you're pushing yourself really hard, but you don't really have a basis for where that is

so like for myself. I always run my sprints on a treadmill because a tremble doesn't lie. This is how sure going, and this is how long you doing it. Now you can go out on the street and say outgoing as fast as humanly possible. Be always gonna hold yourself back a little bit. You know that's just the way we are as human beings. We know that that safety net that we have ingrained in us to not go over that edge, but if you're not pushing that edge, you're, not developing in your always holding yourself back a little bit a little bit and no matter how hard you think, you're going or or how honest you think, you're being unless you how somebody as sites on board, to have people in your lives that that that keep you in that sharpened state. You know that that that that that question you feel that their push you and you know like late for me. Gene is always been that way for me that person like look like a mountain lot. Let me bullshit, you know, Skippy Honesty and sometimes to do

Extreme extension, like you, give me a little bit of a break here, but you know it's like that person that that pushes you and it's uncomfortable to be pushed, and he don't want to be pushed. I want to relax. I don't want to like sit on the beach and drink beers and then do all these things, but is that going to help me get to a better place in my life? Have better place in my mind. In my heart, that's going to allow me to just like the lazy piece of shit and just drift off and die and be no benefit to to myself or anyone else for that matter. So as uncomfortable as it is to be pushed in as I'm comfortable, it is to be pressured into Do you want to sell? We all need those things you either improving eared or your declare that they had such an important thing do keep in mind. Like it's only one or the other. There is now in the middle. It's like the concept of balance. You never find balance

because, once you find it, you lose your always jump in all sides of this line too much or too little. Where are they going to faster, too slow and we're trying to find that perfect? balance of everything and then you'll never can find it, but knowing that you never can find it forces you to be diligent about all these things into constantly be trying to find it in the more you try to find that the more you're going to develop and learn ways, the that aren't the right way and then finding what what does were come on, it's like trying to find near you calling in your passion, lives. I Guiana, NAFTA, necessarily know what that is, but one down by fight. What don't you want to take? What do you hate? Would you hate right? Don't even look what you like when you hear I don't do this- I wonder ass. I wanted this out

learned very early on at a young age like I do not want to go down this path that I see everybody on this go to school, get a job have kids get married retired die like I don't want to. I don't want that. I dont know what I do want. I just know that to me? I don't want anything to do with economic number, to exact opposite direction. And whatever that is long. Some far away from that that this woman was one of the benefits of being an outsider when you're outsider and you see how these people that are supposedly doing the right thing, but living they sort of empty meaning. Lives with that. They don't enjoy Equally the they don't enjoy now and then you don't. I was a kid. I always looked at normal, people living normalizing had never relate. I never understood it. You know, I also grew up. Broken home and we were off on welfare and the end of the whole deal, because I think a lot of motivated people come from a place

despair when their younger and always had this thought in my head that one day I wouldn't get one day. I'm gonna make it I'm gonna make. It and then one day I realize now know when I realized it probably went like on paper. It already made it yeah. I realize oh there's, no sir place like this is not real. Like that, you can't ever you dont make no man, no one makes it yeah, I guess. If every day you have to be trying to do better every day you have to be tried for as well. There is no perfect human was accepted, you're always gonna be flawed. Euro is gonna. Euro is gonna, be subject to fits of re, age and envy and all the things that you wish that you would never have in your mind, so you're gonna constantly be working make sure that never happens. You cause leave you working to make sure that you are always

evaluating your perspective on life and always looking at things from meditate constantly meditate. Make sure that you approach live with a laugh, and perspective, like your a better person you or the day before and whatever you're trying to do where its fighting or whether your do you have. Art form that you practice whatever it is you're doing. You are trying to do better every day and you never. Even if you be a sum up, my one, you know you complex. Some amazing work of art does just that day, the next day gotta go back to work legally like if you have a championship fight and you ve trained for eight weeks and you win by knock out. The spectacular results are very happy with the result. You got a day or two to relax, air to and then you'll I fuck, ok, now what were you now? You gotta get back to work in the future. If you think that there's Some place like a movie where you're

holding hands with your loved ones in the fuckin sunsets go on the credits, raw, that's horseshit and we this idea in our head that there's this place you can get to where you of air quotes made it and I M here to tell you that mother Fucker, doesn't it I mean I am assuming that the most successful person in the world, but on paper, accomplish a lot of shit and it doesn't mean a God, damn thing: every fucking every fuckin day I get out of my guide figure: do their work on this new bit as part has today are gonna, be on point. Let me think about this. When we read this book, let me call you know whenever the subject is, when we get all gonna get into it, you have to, if you don't, you you're gonna, feel like shit yeah, it's that and that destination. Men, tat yeah to their destination, yet still to do. You're, never gonna get there. There's nothing exists is nowhere to go there

as soon as you get there, I do I'm just as far away from that thing that I thought, because, as you develop your ear, the things that you think you want developed yeah I'll day, I'm be rich, but the richer. They do you get the richer, you want to become what and you start filling up your life with these meaningless destinations right, which are Material objects in our Fuckin yacht bitch. I want a jet, you know and you let go on a bigger Jed, Tom's gonna fuckin jet. I want a big one issue: pull my Jeddah beside his yellow, no mother, feathers levels to this game. That's a people do in its day, day their lives up with meaningless possessions and Lydia deals are happy a band aid to cover up the like. What is the real thing here? Johnny, really successful people. I know that a fuckin medicated to shit all olive and allow Elam Alot more more, more more more so than the p that are and always should, the people that struggle there on a better medication for real

the struggle of like like a hard working person that can get get done with a day of hard work and have a feeling of accomplishment and then go. Your family and get Goin again, knowing you had to get up in the morning, you do it again, knowing you don't have enough money to buy a yacht, but knowing you have enough money to put food on the table and his satisfaction to be able to provide that that's a better medicines will that's thing with with white, so important and vital to travel. No go to this. There were countries like these people literally have nothing and are indeed

in perfect strangers into their homes in giving them things they that they'd, they do not even have themselves like. Why are these people so happy? Why are they so at peace right? Because they understand what's important, that it's not this materialistic thing in and that's not to say that materials are bad, but we view them as these. These objects of success in Ireland and in I've made it neither things are perfect, my life and there they do the exact opposite and a lot of ways if you dont have a good grasp of of what's really important in this life and end

fortunately thought and who need everything taken a way for us to really understand what those things really are. Yeah me, you can appreciate some things. You can appreciate a nice car or nice house, but if you get really caught up in them, you are trying to fill up a bucket with a hole in it and it's never going to fill up you're, always just gonna. Look for bigger and bigger things. Try to fill that bucket up in and you're gonna feel all of anxiety, all the time chasing and there's no real, there's no real satisfaction, then that's why you know you look at one of things People look at when you look at people that extremely materialistic that you know where the most. Antsy, jewelry and drive the most fancy cars and the biggest houses. We always think they're shallow, always means not funny like the thing that you'd look at in terms like Melick markers for success. Marcus is likes material. Things are the big once right over the big mark,

as for success, the Big House, that's the big one right gas, Fuckin Mansion lose page everything big everything that big fuckin rock on its finger big chain. You know big this big, that there nothing there, there's nothing there and so ingrained in us from the time that were born because it's hard to get it. That's it that's why to trick it's one of it's hard to get, so you think you want to get it because this I think that are hard to get that are worth getting pressure right becoming a great fighters hard, but it's worth doing because one You do do it and you you realize, like, like there's an expression that our used before or, but my type we know instructor said to me when I was a little boy. He said martial arts or vehicle for developing new human tension and remember that America, oh shit like and I've used it many times explaining to people, but that is the best fit of getting good at a Marshall ART like you go through this difficult thing and then through that,

you reap all these personality rewards Europe. These character awards Europe, this understanding of what your capable of right, if you are capable of making it through, brutal camp and getting up in the morning when you know you don't want to that alarm. Clock goes off like phenomena fuckin run, but you do it. You gotta run into you. Do it every day and you get through it and then you're successful, and you realize that you have this incredible endurance because of the discipline you put it. You realize you have this incredible scale and is understanding of how to fight correctly, because of other time and ours and the focus you're a better person, because that right, that's a real goal, but the yacht you know, like like Lomna, worked sixteen hours days, I get get a bigger yacht and then I need a house with bigger win indeed it does. Nonsense to that. Like look, I'm not saying it you- can afford a nice House get a fucking nice house, it's great to nice house. What I'm saying is not the end its you. You are the poor

project your mind, is the project how you treat people is the project and how you the way you are with your family and your friends and your loved ones and the people you communicate with get better at that? That's that's! That's the goal in this light the governess life is how we treat each other unknown. I wish these are were things that were taught no. No, no, no it's better. It's better that you didn't learn that, because he had figured out just ask as you have figured out yourself and cause, you can explain it to people you in particular that you can explain it to people having gone through this horrific, adversity and come out on the other end with a message, and so other people but are going through its tough shit. You ve got the medicine the medicine is your you ve actually experienced it, and It's a map, it's a map of the territory. It's not it's, not a fuckin oh that, you can take it. Also everything can be better, but what

it is a map of the territory in a knowledge hey you can get through. These were its and on the other side, is a beautiful, green meadow and is awake and really nice Alfred I think that those one one of the benefits of the we grow budget, which is really hot in horrible, but I've got to see first hand both sides of money. You know I went from living in a basement with five of the people living on welfare to living with my father in a mansion and how All this money and all this stuff is just emptiness and in meaningless and in it doesn't necessarily equate to. Real happiness, and why are we all chasing this so hard? And I got to see that first and very, very early on. I don't want this Oh it's a trick. It's like The same reason why people loved play video games because their difficult, but

no there's no real reward and lesser professional videogame player and you make a living zillion. It is no real reward. You just get better. And you get some sort of a sense of satisfaction and mean there's there something to be gained from it. In fact, some video games actually shown to increase your cognitive performance and other things. More to the way chest us, but the trap is that their hard to do so when we see things that are difficult. Human beings are sort of puzzle and problems having oriented, we see, puzzles we want to solve and we see mysteries we're gonna find out that's why I was in the like big foot checklist mystery, Oh, what is it? What do you think it is? We have a natural inclination to try to solve things like that, and we think that, because in life, Look. If you try to solve where the food is, you survive that made us alive. That's why our dna has been passed down for all these hundreds of thousands of years.

Our ancestors figure out where the food is. You know they figured out how to draw whole ice and fish they figure. How do you know how to survive? This is why the things that are difficult to do or attractive to us, but we have to give a differential, between things are difficult and meaningful, and things are difficult and bullshit. My for you know Brian Cowen forever I count said something me once we're really young and it was the perfecting we're both on our twenties and he said. Are you want? Is enough money, so you don't have to worry about what something costs when you go to a restaurant is like everything else. Bullshit you're right out. Yelling of emu will have enough money to just get in

Ice meal at a restaurant and not sweated, like everything else, is gravy yeah. Well, you know they. They ve done countless studies on this, like once you're basic human needs are met in food, shelter, yeah. Everything from that point on his doesn't correlate to any kind of happiness. In many ways is the exact opposite creates more stress. Yes, all these ass like what How much do you really need? And if you the more you you think you need them, the more problems, you're creating and then in the more distractions. You are from the important things in life and in and developing as a human being. You know you're developing all these materialistic things better, not developing yourself, emotionally and mentally, and spirituality and yeah like just as soon as you realize that big. Why why my cheap way? My? What is the purpose of what it is that I am chasing ya, think

daddy was like they said. Eighty thousand dollars everything over eighty thousand hours, like you really duff experience and much want meta before that you're gonna, delightful, thirty thousand thirty thousand well nigh struggling hard to feed yourself, because very its weight on your shoulders, but once you hit a certain number, it's like you gonna, be all right, yeah Ministry of I remember I lived in this parliament. This cash shitty apartment and then move to a better apartment and I was sitting this better partners, like I'm kind of used to this item used this like this is just home now feeling when you get what you're home my guardian of Home now Minnesota Apartment just cost more money. You know I gotta I'm over thinking that, like is better here I mean I guess it's better, that it costs twice,

like now got a fucking thing about how much to pay for this bitch way. I think about like a hair like five dollars in the bank had five thousand dollars in the bankrupt did I feel different. I didn't feel different at all now in how many felt different like when I go out to eat in the Czech, comes coming to pay for this kind of thing by, but emotionally didn't feel any different whatsoever down and I think that such an important lesson for all of us to learn in the early, the sooner you figure those things out. You know that better like so many things in life. We would figure out so late. If ever you know when we were kids, we look at the adults. Are parents some those in authority and I called they got it figured out. Yet you had a really good joke about this. About thinking the older you get the more you you

Stan Life and how things are going on, but that the all the euro is no one knows what the fuck is going on everyone's out here, just wing in here, like I don't know what the fuck I'm doing, I'm just gonna try my best but but, unlike or maybe I should look to my parents for refugees, the really just adult kids out the fact that talking about yeah the bit was d member. You thought the grown ups were real. They don't like eyes and think that one day. I will be greatly outcry and I was young or Serbs one down we grub everything's gonna, make sense and then one day, you're a supermarket and the guy goes paper plastic, sir. No sir, I'm a sir my grown up fuck this and then you realize no one knows any more than you want. The tsar about might have more data yeah, your head. You might have more experience. Maybe a brain surgeon. You might know how to build rockets. You might be smarter than you don't have any fucking idea with this is no one. Does you can not to know you can but everything's,

I think there are. There are really no facts, everything's a theory because weak I'll, be asleep in a dream. Right now are hooked up to a machine like nobody knows that for sure. So how can you possibly say anything is factual. Une savings are factual with the information that in front of you, but that information might be bullshit, and ten years from now makes it might have a completely different perspective on things that were doing now. That we think are right and like this is the way life is tat. The world is Like ten years ago, people very different approach to things but we can say, is as far as we know, this is the case and This is what we know is repeatable. If you do this, if you put to bricks on top of two bricks, you have four bricks: we're pretty sure but maybe not, but we might be in a dream like we can all be long and that's why I think it's so stupid to to judge other people's beliefs

big o your way is the right way. You gotta figured out only everybody else's crazy, but you think it might don't. You think that they think the exact same thing. You do well, there's a problem today and there's a lot of people out there given advice- and this was instinct- sometimes advice red resonates. And then you get older and wiser knee realise our devices really fuckin stupid, because you had its there's people that are giving advice and their there lay. Or there there's like a lot of value in motivating but right now in someone's illegal legitimately motivational person, whether it's like whim ha. I smell, or someone is like really done. Some thinks there's something about them. That then their inspiration, is fuel its. It really does something to you, but then there's a lot of people out there that are

just saying shit cause. They think it's gonna be motivating to other people and it sounds like horse shit here and it only tricks, dummies and that stuff is painfully, prevalent yeah there's so much of it there. So many people out there that are trying to offer advice and they're trying to motivate people, but then you go haven. What have you experienced as they met a placid but life filled with non accomplishments. Biggest accomplishments tricking people into thinking there. Good motivational speaker, like the carriage quick things, are there. So many of those this is how they ve gotten rid sure yeah. Do those watching documentary on one of those guys one of these internet guys who rents houses and

hence cars and brought- tries to pretend this is big, bawler and and spends all this money in the open, ended, ran about scam dating sites and all these different things like wow. This is this is with this pursuit is I'd. It's a fucking. Odd thing is the pursuit of trick, people into thinking that you're, more knowledgeable new, actually arm will resonate with people is like what you were talking about from the beginning, this podcast you talk about your life and how you fell and your own real legitimate experiences and the feelings of inadequacy, and then Finally, the light at the end of the tunnel and all these different things that are just your ear. You're relaying your your life's lessons and experiences. Those are extremely valuable for people. Extremely valuable, but because people know their extremely valuable does a lot of bullshit he's out there that are trying to concoct these things. And in an trick you and I decided smash it is mentioned to you make

so you're gonna whiteboard does. We could do like to just horse sitting near, but there's money in that and so there's a lot of em there's like they pop up all the time I get emails from I get fuckin Instagram messages. I see it, Ok, I want to come on. Show motorway people a Mamma, really bad motivating people per year. Twenty two, the fucker, you motivated you out of any share I'll go moved in Nepal for a year it's also such it's a tricky thinkers like for even for myself, sick of course, and I want to motivate people want to help people and yes, but you can start drifting into Is that now I'm a motivational speaker now, I'm not being honest, communicating the full spectrum of the things that I'm dealing with and going through in my come only going to focus on these positive things like I'll. Just do this this listen. You know it's gonna go the right way and oftentimes because they don't have someone in their life like the way you are describing Gina year. Someone is good, hey fuck face,

maybe your head as someone you, you have to have someone you life, that's wrong, you there's really do it for me. It's my friends Stephanie my wife. She doesn't bullshit me about aiming yellows. Those people are giant. Nearly you. Gotta have people that checking they have to know you too. They have to know you. You can't hide anything from them. We happily how a lot of his tend to have these with the word me, I don't know these people on our lives that, like there, their because you're doing something for them of yours is like YAP. Those people aren't pushing either there did there. Yes, men now, the parasite is parasite thing some real relationship out that that's not that's, not a relationship you're going to grow through that's her that the relationships going to make you feel yes in the lot away as guy it's fun uncomfortable take. But if you, if that person can't get to the core

review, yeah and really like. When you tell me something, I know its truth because you have no other reason than to say bullshit right. You don't owe me you don't need anything from an yeah yeah, that's giant for people, you, you can't it like this one. But I've seen many times of celebrities, yet when they go off the rails. In there They don't hang out with other people like them, so they have real friends. They have these employees and people were indicates real sketchy and everyone. The day talk to interact with need some thing from them and they assume this position of authority where? No one can question them. No one can call Oh shit. No one like you gotta, have peers and very important, and you have, if you know, respecting the friendship of your peers, like man you're a drift, you not tethered you're out there in orbit just fuckin floating around here. Another dimension

yeah, I'm not gonna say: did he get there too? Very easy money, much easier, especially for successful people. People start testing your ass. Back of this is nice. I don't need not only to deal with is how these few around me that make me feel good and see estimates and bring me all the things that I want in me no stress when I meet people I gotta go, you should do Jujitsu yeah go get choked, That said, I tell ya truth and authorities in any anything physical yeah that is extremely thin. Little for everyone I mean particularly kids coming up yachting gets into athlete exam Lastly, I think like then, if you don't like martial arts, but you can't fake a marathon there too. Six point two needs to be run. You need to go left right, left right footing: fuckin, finish line period. End of discussion of you don't do that. You don't get there. You can't fake, fake all shit, yeah, there's a lot of shit. You favour moving your body. You know you can't really think that correctly

Ninety minute, yoga classes. Ninety five minutes: how to shit and you're in this. When your balls off- and you know you gotta, get to the end- you gotta get to the end. It's it's a small thing. That's a small thing in life is a big thing, but these small things you can do there hope you understand, what's necessary to get to the big things here, and this is it's all macro and micro, it's all connected in some strange way. I'm glad you talk while the stuff man of it from the beginning and then leading up to the thing with your stepmom people. You know people need to hear from a guy like you that looks like you. Cool cat. You shit together. It would have been very easy for me just to come in there and ask the bullshit about five when I kind of do that you the year. We can definitely do

now I it's important for me just to be honest with all the aspects of my life into not start drifting into that just now this surface. You know this is who I am and Nino image image mentality, and here I am very aware of not wanting to be there now in trying to always express myself on a trap. The Amis things a trap. It's not bad look good, but that this to concentrate on your image above truth and honesty is, is a real trap and dumb, especially, I think there's fighters fall into that category. A lot because fighting so fuckin it so perilous, yet

know what the future holds. You have no idea. Every time you training tear in Asia. We really have no idea every days and you relying on your tissue to feed yourself right tissue and yourselves and and physical most in an action in order, the that's what you do for a living, it's so pair what's there, so many things is so many things that could go wrong and and when you think about an actual fight itself. I mean the anti Tippit, like I think, back to this past weekend with cowboy and Conner looking at cowboy, like the word, the weight of the moment in hand in his eyes he could see him warming up any talked about. This is video they played before the fight which key. He goes through all of the nervousness and experiences before he fights goes through all the faking.

Smile and pretend in these cool and meanwhile in size, freaking fuck out now all that stuff that adds to this need to make everything looks great yeah for sure. Now we we wanna wanna, be viewed as superhuman down where none of his her now my favorite peace on that was MIKE Tyson in his prime MIKE Tyson that documentary we talked about this mindset and walk into the ring is afraid of losing a girl there once again side and that sexual throbs, God that gives big fucking goosebumps every time you now you just put himself into this state of mind. You know custom model used to hypnotize,

When I was thirteen earlier ere, I don't know about until he was on the park ass. Only we love you ever talked about it, but he was talking about how, when he was a kid like this guy, he went from being this really. You know poor kid too abandoned no love a constant crime and its terrible poverty around him to all the sudden he's get All this love for doing this one thing for smashing people He found himself with one of the greatest boxing mines as ever lived and custom, modern, whose plain to him. Fear and motivation, always if he's hypnotizing, so it's hypnotism is thirteen year old kid to smash. Peep and saying you don't exist, only the task exists and he's putting him

to this mindset, and so then, and it gets into the ring he just fuckin steamroller. People now gives almost like a science project like custom model found at the end of his rope right he's old man about to die he's been through great champions like Floyd Patterson need trained all these great fighters and now he's got the greatest one he's ever seen, but he's a dying man and this kid's thirteen. When this kid it's just me, was an hundred ninety pounds. Thirteen headache, Terrier Teddy Otto said he would bring em to these smokers and no one would believe it you go? How was that there was a house, I care thirteen years, I get the fuck out of here. It's ok hold you think he is sixteen already sixteen put in their way sixteen Europe and he would smile some sixteen year old, you just built insane, You just had insane genetics and then, on top of that he had the greatest mind ever when it comes to

innovation and understanding of fear and boxing who goes studied his entire life and he's a hypnotist and these hypnotizing this young thirteen year old kid to smash people and the results will the youngest champion and one the scariest fuckin fighters in his history. Sport. There is in a cask hills. I mean that's also raised in isolation in the fuckin cats gills up in the mountains, fuck? What story. It's a goddamn movie here in what anything about like how amazing that was for him as an athlete, but out detrimental. That was to him ass, a human being and of things he said to her. Developing with so much later in life and my gear. You understand likewise fucking nuts ass. You know I am a speck, these people to be normal when they're doing this thing right. Why do we expect that? Right? Like you, you you, you want these people to be these amazing athletes and these savages in these states but then, when their human beings on the outside our does as peace. Shit like you can have

given? Have it both ways, whilst also human? Beings are so incredibly nuanced and when someone does a thing wrong, we want their whole too. You're wrong everything they are. We want one or Asia we on a black or a white, and particularly when you're dealing with people like fighters that dealing with this insane amount of pressure and this credible, emotional, rollercoaster right and then on top of that, why do they become fighters in the first place? almost all of em- I mean- let's say, let's just be real generous, say: seventy five percent. Seventy five percent of them came from a fucked up childhood there's. Twenty five percent of a maybe they're just really enjoy competition, but seventy five percent came from a feeling of deficits. Eighty five percent came from a fuck. You I'm going to show you where they came from this thing and people that come from that things are not the most balanced folks. They gonna make mistakes

you know and compassion and understanding and and the ability to forgive there's a there's, some of them most important aspects of community, of friendship and of of the human race. We have to be able to be compassionate towards people that have experienced a different life than we have and we have to be people to forgive people when they fuck up, and we can't just write them off and that's one of the weird things about today with his whole cancel culture. Shit like people just want to decide. You know like be based on a too someone said also something someone did: that's it dear you're cancelled forever, get out the helm, death offered, had the subsidies to many of us. If we do, we just don't value something people in traffic. We don't value each other, because this, There are so many people that you were just ever over. Well meaning abundance of human beings. You can cancel somebody and think about the carrot of whose next

so much easier for us to be judged mental young voice and to say you're wrong. I'm I'm I'm I'm just guide in the way. I am because I've never done that. Some other person- person when we don't look inside me like we're fucked up we'll do all the things you do really awful things to each other in these people were in Spain, lights was easy to point at them and make yourself feel better about the things that you haven't done in the shore or justified in in your actions, but but like we're all fucked up and we all make mistakes, and we all need some sympathy and love and in the we all need these things. Yeah we're all human love. We need sympathy, we need the understanding and we need to be able to say I'm sorry and we need other people to be able accept that we need to be able to communicate with each other and this also Eight culture, I think, is born out of social media because the most bizarre way to communicate ever one way like text mess

As to the world outside that raising a seat- and everybody says that you don't know right and then also people are sending these now really. Disingenuous ones, just hoping the people like them more because the things there saying, which is like a sport So I could see only like second get, who got thing. They didn't feel like it and then your opinion and then becomes who you are I'm an activist, but you just complaining to the void. Creaming out into the world, that's you know we're we're living through strange times. Man, what's the cancel culture in a few days, the the culture of everything is: what's, I think, one of the more detrimental things too. To humanity, is you're there on this site or that side in our swords right, you're sides wrong most. The answer is somewhere in the middle now, but we can't have and in the middle conversation, because it's your with them- are here with us here,

I want to know how people think if I disagree with them, I like talking to people, disagree with well that's what it You know that's really one thing love about your show. Is your ability to communicate with people even the ones? You obviously don't agree with, but you are able to talk to them and to hear their points of view and not be like your fuckin area like even if you're, not psych and talk to them and in, and that is something that is so missing today- is our ability to communicate with people that don't agree with us like just cause you have. Different opinion than me- doesn't mean we can't meet in the middle somewhere or learn from each other. Now or or you know, I'm a big thing for me coming up was can learn from everyone. Even if it's what not to do. Yes, that is so vital in no harm in everything, but life for me and train goes like this person didn't want them

fuck they're doing, but maybe one day I'm going to like that. So maybe I should I should get a little grasp of their mentality. And now that just applies to livestock. Maybe you don't agree with their thought process, but it you can at least understand it. An end know what it is you do in don't like. No, it's your beliefs. Are you gonna, take a step outside of your beliefs to understand if it is that and what you believe, or is it just the way you are raised in the way you grew up like? Do you really believe these things? Have you ever taken a step outside of them were or listen to somebody else's alternate perspective on what they believe in in in have an open mind to effect. That kind of makes sense a little bit it's hard because you don't get that many relations with people where you disagree with them and it's not confrontational, usually there confrontational or your confrontational. So it always start from the bad foot I've. I've learned how to do

from doing. This part chasm minimal, surprising things about dunes podcast. Is I learn how to talk to people better? I didn't think that was a thing I thought I just did. Was talking to people, but then I realized somewhere along the way way Nano IP listening, but sometimes I'm annoying hideaway cutaway. This is where our lesson annoying in learning how to do things that are less knowing I become a more compassionate conversationalist. I understand how to talk to people better I've, I've gotten. It's I apply it to my whole life. Now I've gotten better out, and I see people who are bad at it, it so frustrating. I got some really smart friends and talk to them when they just fuckin, interrupt each other and they interrupt you and they don't let anybody talk did not listening is waiting for their time to talk and it's it's so strange, they're not but to ever consider other people's opinions. They think that everyone, but them is wrong and it's you know it's basically like.

You know how it is when you see a Youtube video where people have no idea how to fight you seem fight. You know that thing tat city. That is so crazy. I've are to this day, I'm like. I would do more, No, it's my life. I want to find anybody, but I see people find they have no idea how to find a MIKE. I imagine myself if I was in a street fight with go like this is. I would be like. Why are you doing this man? This is so Is you don't know what you doing pay there? Are you crazy you? Can he killed your lucky on nice, but that's the same way, conversation. There's a lot of people. Are there having conversations have no idea how to talk, they don't do not even really listening to you there just so, why are you doing that? Why you arguing new urine conversation, you don't even know how to have one listening there just talking you just using someone like like a wall, the throne. Fuckin tennis ball off under bizarre. Yeah? Well, you are. You have issued a statement on this issue. At the usual ass,

sure is, like you have to idiots in a room, it's the more confident one that they listen to you, and it's that that concept of Eu Justice say my words in your hammer and opinions in you. Don't think just be loud and make a lot of noise it again. The trionel eggs checkmate you instead of like having a communication in conversation that finally socially dominate in this like ice to do it for sure yeah I mean I I think it's a learned saying you know these people do to you and you go man. I got a fucking, kick my ass! Now conversation number you better take and people's s. Then you it better sort to bull dogging people talking over them, we're talking loud or have these they like these, sentences that maybe get pour out here, ass every now and then to shut people down zounds good and it becomes a sport That is what it really should be. Mrs sharing ideas and communicate with people If you really into the sport of just debating people and shut,

people down insulting people. Ok, that good for you. But people like listening to that that my chair, people like listening to fruit, but I've met from our experience. Is someone actually talking to someone, someone actually expressing their thoughts and then the other person consider their thoughts and either agree or disagree, but people are so happy when you could do that without real conflict near you know, I've got some people on that it just five years ago. I would, if I would just you fucking moron screened them. What are you talking about? You you're an idiot. Go fuck yourself, jump off a bridge, but instead of doing that, Abdullah, ok, why do you think that, and tell me tell me what about this? Here's what I think, let me tell you what Thank you tell me what you think. This is why I want to do that in a non like snarking way. Oh yeah, I think that the only more by reallocating like say, you're, the best how to people

that's how you understand who they really are they so valuable survive? For me, it's just from I know it's valuable for people who are listening, but just for me as a whole, from my own education has been everything everything I've learned more from talking to people on this podcast, both from talking to score dollars and scientists in really telling people end morons I've learned a lot from talking to morons. Just just the awkwardness way. They process thoughts in the way they view the world and the way they have chosen communicate a you, from that. Just like you say like or sparring with. Some is really doing, has terrible habits get this guy. What the fuck are you doing that? But you learn you can learn from people living that something that there really separates you from a lot of people. I mean like

there's shows or provide very opinionated in loud, and you know people like that kind of thing, but your ability to communicate in to bring our conversation, regardless of what the subject matter is, makes it very intriguing and you can learn a lot from regardless of who the guest is like. You learned so much from these people because of the way you are able to communicate with them. The way you are able to bring conversation and in get in depth with all of these subjects, MA genuinely curious about most things and I'm Joe you curious about the way I think like. Why do I think that were so someone things different than me I am genuinely curious like. Why do you think there's an instinct to go now? You're fuckin wrong, I'm right, but I this guy. I know that is that's trick. Don't do that that dumb, dont think that way. Try to find out the snot game. So I contest find out why this person thinks this way and it's better for everybody

yeah, but it's just a lost talent like the lot people do- and I didn't even know a thing, so I started doing podcast. It just took me a wily pie castle like anything else. For me at least as I am doing it, I'm trying to get better at it, and I realize I used to not be as good like. I can't listen to my part gas, but if I did last night, the old ones from the beginning, prevalent terrible to see rice plus most have allows high out of my fuckin mine, no half what I was talking about. Why was I in it? I was wrong in conversations left and right, but these conversations for me are like it's like going school psyche everyday gone school about humans. We go school about whatever the subject there talking to me about, but also going to school How do you know the more people talk to special like this? No cell phones we're we're in headphones and does want to resume like headphones is because your voices in I hear you're not over there. You right here, man, you're, we're locked in and this is

exactly the same way that other people going to here, which is a very unusual way to hear a conversation. You don't think about it. That way, but most atomic here conversation you voices louder cause it's closer and their over there. I knew tat. Into each other, and you know. Maybe you check your phone, or maybe your distract by other noises, but when you are in, aren't you don't hear anything else. Yes, he locked in and when, when else would you- and I am we're friends- I've known you for years where will we ever sit down this for hours just across regions stared each other's eyes? Just talking and our thought about that with the headphones big, its interest, It keeps you from talking over each other too much too. Conversations are improvisational right. You know you have a dance. Partner. You know one step on each other's toes. You do occasionally so you better at it, and it's for more than two people, its mandatory like when you have three or four people park ass. You cannot do it without headphones or assist talking over each other. I learned

during those fight companions area is everyone's drunk and they have headphones on it's sort of at least coms. Some of the overtime makes sense. You I saw is a journeyman like everything else. Like everything else, it's a joke. I mean, if you doing it right here, relationships being apparent being com media and being a fighter being a doctor. I'm sure you. If you're concentrating on you get better at yeah, I'm sure yeah. I think I think the understanding of it's a constant balancing at it's a constant development. The sooner you come to terms and understand that the better off you're going to be okay, we get locked into these ways of thinking these ways of living and your dad. That way till you die

a lot of people are an end to constantly be questioning yourself to be searching. I feel, like I'm, a seeker seeking different ways to do things: different ways that think different perspectives on situations put particular ones I might be like stuck on like this is the way I think that is what I believe like. I want to explore what my beliefs and feelings and viewpoints are on everything. Yeah, I think that is how you gain a better understanding of what this thing is. What this thing were experiencing is which nobody knows what that nobody else. Yeah, I just got aluminium there's some scientists that are the blood there trying to the written a book about it, but they're trying to come on the pie. Castor, lay out all of the reasons why this is so.

Relation Adam I'm going over some other work like this is fucking so crazy. He as if, if they're right, when we do it in a video game, if the writer everywhere and then there's the thought that maybe that is what life is period, yeah and that this idea of, like one day working to create an artificial environment that we exist in that's going to be distinguishable from the real world exists in now. Maybe it's always that maybe it's been that from the big, Getting an evolution, is actually a part of this long game and that this cycling of law, in life and death and all these things is just a part of this, same way. Long, progressive game here,

Furthermore, I knocked and unwanted think about it. You know who can say that that's not the case here. You know nobody, nobody can now you can't yet in the more you think about it. They might like check out of reality today, Rizzo. It's it's scary thing, I'm also genuinely curious as to other people's perspectives like two sometimes, oh, I you know I love. Reading people's takes on current events takes on p, bull and take some like movies and music and not because I I disagree with. So many of them were. How is this pursing viewing the world like? I would like to be them for a short period of time. If I knew for a fact, I'm coming can be me again. I want to see what are you saying like how do you are you in pain, overtime? Go you just what it. Why are you mad stuff like what is it? You know? I guess emotional thing or is your mind just? Why are different the whirl assuming right that water

taste the same to you than does to me and that, like the sunshine feels everything of sunshine feels good but Phyllis saying I don't know What you're sunshine feels like right there and I think, about a lot when five is like this is why we both its way, but maybe this looks completely different to the army. This. Why looks, yellow yellow now called the same crying because where we agree in that's like so much of reality is just something we all agree upon until we dont until we change our minds, but there's somebody pupil at sea and feel and think that different things and we look at them as crazy, because the majority of us say that's not the way we see or shore, but all anything is an agreements upon what this thing is, and that is that what makes things real, that we agree,

that too real trail either. All we think about other things are people of tastes for like food, for example, there's people enjoy certain flavour, slinging spicy foods, for example, and this other believe fuckin hated my wife's mom. She can't have anything with anyone upper, nor anything even remotely hotshot owed to hot enough everything. You do, and I can't make these hot enough porn hot sauce on everything like what is she feeling like? What is it like? A wonder, if she had my taste buds like what is it what am I experiencing different than her. What you know, what people that loves? certain kinds of music there's people, I've tried so hard like jazz, because it seemed very cool thing like like seems like you, must be cool. Guy, like jazz, like my good friend, Alonzo Boden, hilarious comedian, loves jazz, goes on jazz crew this is just stand upon his cruises. I try man, I try list

do I get some of its kind of cool but virtues, but jazz and other museum. I get the fuck out of his one music that gives wiped off the face. The plan- I don't I'll, probably really dumb country song, but outside it countries arms. I just I don't know what they are experiencing. What is it about it? That's resonating why do some people go bonkers for some movies and other people think they suck like? What is it one thing that always trips me out, as I think about like people with you as lunatics, what if they are seeing reality and we have blinders on you know, because when you take into account what a finite percentage of what's really out there, that were able to see with our perception that you know what the fuck are like X rays, memories, and all of these things like we have such a tiny filter on everything, that's really going on out there. Now we don't really see, we know see shit,

where the what's really there and like maybe these whacked out people are just seeing more of what's happening in that's what makes them not switches. Not seen Ali demons fine around and all these colours and back. We just have we have of filter on that. So we can like process, information like. I a keeps us same, but that I mean what's really going on out there. Basing about how small amount of acid you need to take to completely perturb the way we view the world. I think Mckenna described. This turns became described acid, that the potent. Of acid is like its literally like four in terms via the amount you need in order to have an effect He made an analogy like an ant deconstruct the entire empire state building in a matter of seconds like that's how potent it is in terms of volume. You know you couple drops

acid in a huge human body and your trip and balls for seven hours, you know that's a chemical disruption of this very delicate, ecosystem. So, if your Nero chemistry's off in any way, or down sideways screwy, get too much of this or too much of that which we know is the case with everything right like somebody were born with bad. I cite some people are born deaf, so people are born and they have problems, processing pain. You don't feel pain correctly. Some people are born. They must have an imbalance of the chemicals that are floating around side. You had here and there you. The world is radically different than ours. India, and also those camera. We can shift depending on for your personal experience like life. We abuse children are abused, their chemicals in their head as are developing or off their different, their brains, or did They process life different because of abuse people that it

Sperience extremes trauma extreme violence when they young PTSD their processing things differently, the people that have not yet, what's even crazy about that. As I read a book called, it didn't start with you and it talks about how these things are passed on generationally from like trauma your grandparents had is passed on to you through your dna and in it, and it changes us like how much is condos that we have no control over. That alters our the way we feel things we. We see things all of these experiences, that people have that that that that that just get past passed down like that without any outside influence, just Justin process of being do how many children. Now, when you have children, you see it in a really weird way. My man, daughter, my eleven year old, is an obsessive, yeah, she's she's

obsesses on things and tries to get bad around them or you got to try to tell hate time to go to bed she's doing like backflips in a roman chest like stop, stop go to bed like you got to go to bed, but that's me can, and I was taught I was fucked up. I was like I thought, was doing this- and I probably was my whole life to try to show but I had value because I felt like was ignored, and I didn't know my dad and I was felt an outsider in a loser and I was felt like I would become throw myself into things to show that I had value and I'll get really good at things. To show that I had value and I'll, be there This obsession was like me, trying like trying to escape the existential eggs of my existence and just at the cons, anxiety in this just feeling of just inadequacy.

Trying to escape it by being obsessed with things, but also trying to prove through getting good things that I have value is the first time ever felt like I was worth any Nothing was when I started getting good at martial arts like then, then people so respect emails like oh. I rather think that people think good. Now that I'm good at this thing that became identity in their budgets through myself into that, but my door was grown up with none of that, like she's, all loved and she's all smiling and happy, and should not depressed she it's out of. And she has friends but she's, a fucking psycho, and unlike you got that for me, like you got crazy gene, but you got it without all the fucked up parts, you're, not sad! You got it without the sad you just want to get good stuff without like a happiness to it and also a feminine happiness? instead of a masculine like a graduate smash, so I wanted to do. I want to smash things because I was angry. She angry. So it's weird:

see this obsessive like completely absurd. Such behaviour in terms of like trying to get better thing, and she accelerated Sheikh cell, that so many different things that she gets good at. She gets good at things and they become our whole life like all day long, obsessive like to really weird, but in a happy way So it's it's strange genetically you know you ve met my dog Marshall, fucking, ices Dog in the world right he's so nice, that's a genetic thing that dog is a golden retriever and when he like, when you come over him and he starts. Why so happy you want to get Pat and he runs and grabs a toy. Always he always want to bring something like teach about three years of arms is he was a little tiny baby whose, like six weeks old man, I gotta, know out, of Dana's life. Everyday, fun but the

learned through his dna that he's supposed to retrieve things and bring them over and that you are happier when he brings things over. Because that's the dna, that's in his system, snap, you learn, it this- is literally inside of him from the box. I grab a box Look at the ingredients. Oh he likes to bring you things because his ancestors brought you things his answer. She's brought other people things. There were awarded for this at all. They give me treats and they, like, more. When I bring things I'm gonna just keep when you, you know you should a duck the sky and they can get that dark and bring it over and everybody gets happy so did in him yeah its critical. I think we understand what what dear I actually is, or whatever the fuck you needed. Dna just any run with it the components of the wife form that are passed when two lifeforms breed and they make another one. I don't think we really understand it. I think we have a rudimentary understanding of the chemistry involved, but in terms of like

personality in terms. Of like other the thoughts that are in our heads. I was right something by Rupert Shell dragons talked about. Why Children are afraid of monsters. His children grow up in a city are afraid of monsters are not afraid of like gunshots and car access things that are really scary. Their freedom monsters, because our aims ancestors were eaten by cats year. There were eaten and by wolves in those countries. Well, we were afraid of fangs and things the dark when you can't see them commonly, can protect yourself, creating crazy seen there in the dna them in their somebody does so much stuff like that. Just we don't understand any. Thing. Have you ever met someone that has like a legit phobia like a video phobia Arachne, a phobia fear snakes are spiders,

I have I'm trying to think of the who the words but yardstick. Where did that come from the stand, aim a guarantee of have seen our fear factor. We had a few people that had a legit fear. Snakes inspires. Oh, my god, you see, the whole body was shaking and there are trying his hunting and fucking poisonous these are just snacks but there's something about snake like someone they love or there s one in their ancestry or some someone provide a snake attack, something yeah there's something here: in like so much of that is, is realising how little control, over everything like how we raise our children or how we interact with people like what does and does not affect us like the fact that this works in any remote ways is insanity. There doesn't make any sense. We think it makes sense because its normal to us, but it really tickets,

that back and like think about it, this is nuts Therewithal nights. This life is nuts in Nino, like sitting here with the use nuts in a year in time. I live like like some of the people you ve met through this unlikely, like how did I get here like what is this? If you allow anything like what the fuck is going on? What do they do to get here like this weird? What did I do to get here? I think I really believe in some strange way that this thing made me do this year that this part cast like almost like the universe made me do this, That sounds like so pretentious, but I'm just being honest. I feel like almost this thing has a life of its own and a mine of its only tricked me tricked me and in a played on my obsessive mind, just keep doing it to give due it maybe get better at this, keep doing it bring on other people, keep doing to keep tunic and through this, untold millions of people been exposed, as if we had three big,

we in downloads over the course of ten years so I do know how many people, that is, the individuals, but it's a fuck load. So all of these different people of come on and expressed all these different, as in so many different people are here in them in their ear buds, they're in traffic or when there at the jam and all these ideas percolate inside p, was brains and that it gives them different perspectives, and then it makes some may be explored things. Maybe on metrology jitsu, maybe try yoga, maybe maturity, better. Maybe I tried try doing this and through all that you see a shift in the culture the human beings there that have been in that have been affected by these peoples conversations and for me it feels like I just I'm gettin sucked into being here. I got MIKE and then also like me getting better at it is just me it's like,

showing me how extract better information get out of my fuckin way. Don't ruin it and make it better for the people who are listening is really what it feels like there are no two ways or even saying that sounds like hippy bullshit well, and you think about like a wire. We attracted to certain things certain people certain sometimes or attract people. It doesn't make any sense, concerns milk. Everything you do and say make me feel is like everything opposite of what I really want an but but am attracted you and make these the attic like bring a certain thing. Me yeah develop me in a certain way and where nobody else can do that, then you this person does that for me for some reason or this action this sport. This thing like why my drawn right right back, I shouldn't be likened fuckin, portable and like it hurts, and

all these things that doesn't make any sense at all, but nothing makes any sense at all, and it doesn't make any sense in like that and that's why it's so vital to follow your heart and follow things you feel because everything else so I can own the fuck is going on, like nobody can tell you what you should do, Jordan due to bees successful or to be happy or to be all these things. Are you gotta listen to what's inside of you, yeah and you can be wrong. You good listener. What inside inside of you and you can be wrong, but you have to learn how to decipher that voice better here, like I've been wrong about. Things, and I thought I wanted, and then you go TAT is why I was wrong outdo delusion, Oros, killing myself.

Work sitting down where I was thinking that this thing's gonna bring me some sort of peace, so who's gonna bring me some sort of such as some sort of just normalcy, yeah now and then it doesn't happens, God. I love Gus, whereas now we'll see nothing as normal, everything's crazy on that nobody knows. What's going on all those things Thus you re a t shirt. Nothing is normal. Everything is crazy. No not at all the sooner, we realise that the better it will be like grown loony, Loon, yeah, yeah it'll, but will definitely be easier That's why I'm I'm all scared of drugs that make people confident my ever drugs marijuana, because it does the opposite and make me confident that makes me paranoid and makes me

makes me compassionate and it makes me also. I go and Jews crazing. That's why I like it. I like it because I think the drugs that make you can t we should not be a little less confident We need each other a lot more than we like to pretend, and this life is like this temporary, saying that were going through. We have a certain amount of heart beats and then, who knows the lights, go out and hopefully go to a better place, but from their? Why aren't the thing it does two's it strips that that they'll away like that veil over shone like everything's imbalance in normal in me, no life like this lifelike life, his fucking, weird man, we're super weird super: will we distract ourselves with normal, see in habits but take stepped back and like this is nuts that all knots- and we pretend like it's normal- it's cool in ruins, like in agreements that, like we all know, what's going on Fox God, I'm all evidence spaceship flying do

the atmosphere, yeah, we're all trip and balls over here, although in its it so feels normal, but we can find some moments of comfort and happiness in the chaos and that's what we're we're all seeking We are seeking these moments of comfort and happiness and camaraderie and and friendship. You know we're all seeking love to we're all seeking good feelings, but gotta get through that shitty. One Stephen appreciate the good feeling its accounts twenty two there, but to understand. The good and the bad you don't good is unless you have, but it has to be that way. So we're we're getting towards three clock here, we're almost gonna rapid, now. What are you doing now?

in terms of your career, you're, still fighting for Belcour, yeah, yes or take boxing, which very very thankful that they have that. Still, you know I'm a gigantic fan of take boxing in my time and so was perplexed me It has an caught hold in America, more than has, which is something we need time for yeah, I'm very thankful that Paramount network is still invested, he shouted Scott Pokers Scott Koker amazing shadow. Is God there is another, get that big fight this weekend with Julie, Boden, cyborg school beyond so frightened for their minority living on the books. Right now, I'm waiting like I always have been since the beginning of time. You know some you think is going to change. I haven't Germany Voice fights I've never known when the next one is certainly not when the next one is, after that bottom Yeah, I'm hoping some will come up, and you know, as far as how

song- I'm going to keep doing this out. I don't know man, I could be done today and maybe I'll decide on a fucking. Do this shit anymore, but I think I've always had a healthy understanding of that fighting is woody. Do and I will always be a fighter, but this isn't it for me. I have so many things that I do my life in alarm. Merida Cosette, I'm workin on my arm. Autobiography right now is written to book. So far, I'm an artist, a pain I draw play piano little bare town. I speak a renaissance man. Do Could you be more invested in art when you're done I don't know you know We definitely have more time to do it in as far as how much I'll do it s career, I don't know for me are, is always been something that I do

because I love to do it if it starts becoming a gr boards? Are you need to do this? We need to do that. I think that would make me loose I love for it now. You know that my nose thing so, but I think you can get through that without becoming a job. I think that's a priest active because the end of the day it still art like just cause? You have to do for a job like like what does that mean just do it. You know I mean like if you think I have to do now now the job but taking other than the expression Marin, your mistress. Well, I think you can just do art you known in Egypt, be obsessed with it like you are, if it's not a job and then the other parts assorted, take care of itself. Why that, like everything I do, I feel, is artistic expressions of my fighting. My actual are sure my writings in those kinds of things better.

I don't think I'll ever be. Luke have be stuck on a job or one thing you notice is too interested in too many different things. You know, I think I'll always be balancing many different aspects in certain time: I'll, be more focused on one thing, like my fighting. Obviously that's a very finite timeline on that born sets done. You know it's gonna shift I think it will always be that way to the to one extent or another. I will be always be doing a multitude of things and exploring and developing and learning and yeah, like I said, I'm a seeker I love it when you done knew. Why do some mouths come back here and talk to her tat? I would love to madness, has been really great. My pleasure brother always appreciate man think even Kevin Raw slays and thankee goodbye. Oh, thank you, friends, thanks too to the show, and thank you to our sponsors, beginning with one of my all time. Favorite

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