Catherine O'Hara ("Schitt's Creek") reads Patricia Morrisroe's essay, about a piece of technology that complicates a marriage.
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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Oh, the from the New York Times and WB. You are Boston. This is modern. The stories of love loss and redemption. I'm your host magnetron puberty, the have you ever been on a vacation, that's supposed to be perfect, but then you have a moment where you just cannot.
Stand the person you're with
in Patricia Morrisroe and her husband went to England. Together they had one of those experiences and
writes about it in her essay, another voice had come between us. It read
Catherine O'Hara, who stars in shits, creek,
it on wednesdays at ten p m on pop tv, you can also find it on Netflix,
on a romantic trip through the english countryside. My husband fell in love with another woman. He met her at a car rental agency on the outskirts of London, where she arrived with the upgrade.
I get nervous about driving on the opposite side of the road he was eager to pay for her escort services and before I knew it, she was with me in the front seat. By the time we had reached the first motorway, I was ready to toss her from the car, but as the voice of our GPS unit, she'd, cleverly embedded herself in it,
my husband, nicknamed her Emma after MRS Emma Peel, the beautiful spy in the tv show the Avengers with her genius I q and martial arts ability. Mrs Peel was a feminist super
Europe racing around England and a sexy Lotus, a LAN convertible
the new am I never gave it a more mundane Audi, but with thirty two satellites at our disposal she was a wizard directions when she uttered your route. Guidance will now begin your new. You were capable hands, even if she didn't have any
the only time we took a wrong turn. We wound up at a spectacular hidden garden at my husband, proclaimed his favorite spot on the entire trip. Since we had planned to vacation
Celebrate our twenty second wedding anniversary, my husband's infatuation with an invisible
woman, didn't say a lot for where we were heading.
he wasn't alone in channeling a juvenile fantasy I
We organize our vacation around a much anticipated rendezvous with my adolescent crush heathcliff of weathering heights. I'd fallen for him in nineteen. Seventy. After seeing the film version of Emily Bronte's novel at my childhood Cineplex in Peabody Massachusetts, it starred Timothy Dalton, who, in his pre bond days stuck the rain, swept moors howling for his beloved Cathy. So what if he was sadistic and probably psychotic? This was a man who would love you until the end of time or read list the end of the credits. I tried to explain their convoluted romance to my husband over
M, is excessive chattering, but he was in Thrall to her british accent and computerized lisp. Isn't she amazing? He said ass? She navigated another maize like round about. I was too
you about he's cliff. We sounds nuts.
At least he's real. I replied which technically wasn't true, but in comparison to Emma's disembodied voice, he held a slight edge. Can't we please turn her off she's. Given me a headache, then you drive, it was a low blow and he knew it. I don't drive unless I have to which, in our marriages, hardly ever forty two years ago on my maiden voyage in the family car with my mother in the passenger seat, I accidentally hit the dock on Easter Sunday. The dog was knocked down yet escaped without a scratch, but it's owner, along with his two little girls began, screaming murderer, murderer and in the
emotion, the girls Easter Bunny jumped out of it's straw, basket and hopped into the woods up, HAWK swooped down. You can imagine the rest from then on. Whenever I got behind the wheel, my mother would remind me not to kill any animals which had the expected inhibitory effect to compensate for my fear of driving. I concocted a theory that in every successful relationship, there's a driver and a passenger which exactly describes my husband and me I'm the idea person who plans the itinerary while he's the steady navigator who gets US places. We are living proof that often
It's attract he's in finance, I'm a writer he's quiet, I'm a talker. The list is so long that the minister married us insisted. We fill out an extensive compatibility which we flunked. It seems like you're heading in different directions. He said, but he was wrong for the next two decades. We went in one direction: mine the vacation to Yorkshire, which I had fashioned as a masterpiece. Theatre extravaganza with visits to numerous country, houses and gardens, was no different. My husband never complained mustering interest in her basis, borders and follies.
The is one request was to avoid driving on this one day, since we were staying in a renovated castle hotel on acres of parkland, he wanted to hike and then take it easy. He had a conference call for work and needed to be back at the hotel by late afternoon perfectly reasonable, except it was our last day to visit Bronte.
Tree, but I'll die. If I don't see the moors, I said: picturing Heath, cliffs brooding, face against a gnarled and craggy landscape. Ok, he said it was a long drive, but Emma was her usual exemplary self, getting us to brought his home town hall Worth without a glitch on route. We pass plenty of what I imagined were tales, but no more
Do you know the difference my husband asked, I had to admit I didn't accept. In my mind, the moors came with Michelle the grounds lush weathering heights soundtrack and the Dales with Emma's grating voice. Howarth was crowded and touristy. My husband wanted a traditional ploughman's lunch at a pub, but we wound up at a deli drinking weak tea and eating rock hard scone
the brought a personage museum was an even bigger disappointment. It wasn't even on the moors. This may sound stupid, but where are the moors? I asked a woman. She told to follow the path behind the parsonage we walked for a while, but encountered on him
bunch of sheep- we really should be getting back. My husband warned. I stopped an elderly man who told us the Moors were ten minutes by car. I guess these are them. I said when we finally arrived. The barren land did look fairly wild, though nothing like in Wuthering Heights. My husband took a photo of me with my hair blowing in the wind. Okay, let's go, he said I begged him to. Let me have a few more minutes. I walked ahead alone. I had no idea what I was looking for. Did I expect Heathcliff to ride up on a black stallion. Take me in his arms and offer a life where we'd live forever and never have to drive
suddenly I heard my name echoing through the moors. It was a soulful, a romantic just annoyed. Do you see what time it is my husband said when I got back into the car we have ninety,
That's until your call, I answered. Don't you trust your faithful? Emma
You know you're, very selfish. Mercifully Emma cut him off, alerting us to a coming traffic issue. She suggested the back roads to avoid a pilot, but soon we were on a narrow, dirt path where we had to pull over to let a car pass. My husband kept looking at his watch, driving faster and faster Emma doesn't know where
Going, I said, I think she's lost her mind and you're driving like a maniac you're going to kill us. Okay, I've had it you drive, he said I had never seen him so angry. He got out of the car sidestepping a pile of manure. Okay, then I will, I said, calling his bluff, but he wasn't kidding. I got behind the wheel. Surely he'd! Stop me. I thought, but he didn't Emma, who had been. My rival was now my trusted ally up ahead, where sheep and cows and horses, what were they doing in the road? Don't kill any animals. I heard my mother say, and now I was facing a herd of them. Emma was no help whatsoever, while brilliant at detecting traffic she was clueless. When it came to livestock, I felt ill and guilty my normally sweet tempered husband, who always treats me kindly except for now.
was going to miss an important call. I dodged pigs, dogs and chickens while Emma kept giving insane directions when she set your destination is just ahead. I laughed like a mad woman. We were in the middle of nowhere and then I saw the hotels criminally did roof. Could it be even my husband look stunned amazing. He said yeah Amis pray great. Oh, I mean you, you are amazing. You drove with five minutes to go. He jumped out of the car and race towards the ancestral home that wasn't hours dashing across land that wasn't a more ordeal but a manicured lawn. But at that moment with his hair wild and his blackberry, he was the most romantic hero in all of brandy, country.
you're out kinds, has now entered ever said, something else. It ended. My passenger only status and our marriage, even without the help of thirty two satellites, I knew my husband and I had just entered a new world. That's Catherine, o Hara reading Patricia Morris rose essay.
Another voice had come between us has Patricia driving record stayed clean since this peace came out we'll catch up with her after the brink.
I love falling by violent and I often play spelling bee together by together I mean
ing next to each other playing individually and not cheating. Sometimes when I open up spelling bee- and I see that you have completed a few words on your own, I feel a little betrayed in sorry. It may have happened again
I have one friend
I will send screenshots from spelling bee of inappropriate words, and I was getting nervous. I sent it to my parents or something like that.
me and my dad. We like to play fun together and I wish the out I forgot to see it. J a c k, P, o t Jack,
yeah yeah now run nice
I'm same is asking the digital puzzles editor for the New York Times. You can try, spelling bee and all our games at annoying times dot com. Flash Games Patricia Morris ROW says that, throughout her relationship with her husband,
Navigation has been a recurring theme. My close friend fixed us up on a blind date and we went to a mexican restaurant and it was a terrible date. We had absolutely nothing in common and I said I'm never going to see this guy again but as we walked out of the restaurant, we kind of
in step. In a way that made me say, I'm gonna marry this man now why I was thinking. I didn't want to date this man, but I would marry him, but there was something about a transportation theme even then, and then
our second date. He took me up in a glider because he's a glider pilot and my sister said to me: wow, you must have been guilty desperate for a date.
If you had a guy, you hardly know take you up on the glider, but I think I intuitively trusted him as a navigator. Even back then,
but in the seven years since her peace came out, Patricia has become more comfortable behind the wheel herself, I didn't become Danica, Patrick less power, flag
I mean I drive now I've yet to kill or even hit any,
animals, so I'm much more confident as a driver, and I think because of that there there's a certain independence that I have not not M appeal. You know my husband does
prefer to drive for the most part, but now I know you know if he gets tired or doesn't feel like it. I can also drive that is liberating and I think that's changed. The balance of the relationship
nowadays, Patricia's husband has a new gps. That's replaced Emma the GPS system on my husband's car. Currently has a New York,
sent not the same thing bad about New York accents, but this woman has the most grading voice. We don't even have a name for her she's
anonymous and we put her on as little as possible and Patricia still thinks that a gps and how it helps you course correct is a good metaphor for marriage marriages or
it's an adventure but they're also about negotiations and compromises
and realizing when perhaps you're pushing too hard in being able to admit that
you're the selfish one, which I definitely was in this case, and
just enjoy the ride but recognize that there's a lot of work along this journey. There just is: that's, Patricia row she's author of
Paypal, Thorpe, a biography, wide awake and nine and a half narrow my life and shoes, she's currently finishing
novel about Beethoven and the woman to whom he dedicated the moonlit sonata you ve got more after the break. I love Allenby, my boyfriend and I haven't play stalling meeting
whether by together I mean sitting next to each other playing individually and not cheating. Sometimes when I open up spelling bee- and I see that you have completed a few words on your own, I feel a little betrayed. Sorry, it may have happened
I have one friend
I will send screenshots from spelling bee of inappropriate words. Then I was getting nervous. I sent it to my parents or something like that.
Me and my dad. We like to play fun together and I wish color out. I forgot to see it J, a c k, P, o t Jack
yeah, yeah
I'm same is risky the digital positive for the New York Times. You can try, spelling bee and all our games at annoyed times, dot com, flash games, here's
Jones Editor of the modern love column for the New York Times, but there are certain period
Several years ago, seven or eight years ago, when GPS devices just became so widespread in the voices that accompany it,
I started with Sir warming their way into our lives that I I actually got a bunch of essays.
They were all on this topic that had to do with sort of a weird
kind of infidelity, of having this relationship with the voice of the GPS or other electronic voices and people trying to
create a workable essay around that idea, and none of them really worked, because it was all sort of it
Shallow level, but this one really did because
really revealed their relationship and asserted.
Possibilities and incompatibility of their release.
In Japan and that GDP as voice was just what sort of brought those things to the surface and, of course, in a very funny way, just she's.
really funny writer and
I I just I left a bunch of times reading this, this piece when it first came in
and in this case it brings them to sort of a boiling point and then gets them passed it almost to a better place. It makes her up a brave or person to be in competition.
The G Ps woman than she would have been otherwise
and here's Catherine O'Hara on why she chose to read this piece felt real. I could hear her talking and telling the story and it wasn't predictable and I like that they.
Good, that's real! On our honeymoon, my husband. We went to ITALY, we were in Rome and I had a map of course had never seen before and studied, and my husband's yelling at me
new husband is yelling at me in the middle of Rome say where now, where do we go now? Where do we go down? If I said I'm, not frog, Rome, I don't know so I get it
She stars, as Moira rose in sheets Creek, which errs
wednesdays at ten pm on pop tv next week
has anyone Boneyard e one day,
His caseworker said to me
You need to understand: is that he's not going to be fixed? He'll have good days and bad days he's trying, but don't ever forget that he is a person. He isn't just an illness
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Transcript generated on 2022-04-16.