This week's minisode is a compilation of hometown stories about badass parents.
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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fresh dot com. Slash ever have twelve and use code, Emma them, twelve for twelve three meals, including free shipping, that tell a fresh dot com, Flash Emma them twelve and Code Emma them. Twelve for twelve three meals, including free shipping, go back. you, reach Favorite murder, by cast every three two three another article, because we find, let's just see what happens if you memorize mobile number, are greatly impressed with you will not be cool. Did
I don't know my own fun? I don't think I know your area code ever equal everytime. I put my my phone number into like of any kind of the harm that I'm feeling I have to say it out loud and like picture it in my mind, I do then send them rise, each other some numbers way back when just in case of emergency for safety at sea, each others too. Ok so case members, amazing money or memorize it better. If it's on the show- and I am helps it like you- just listen to it over and over again- and this is my very verge on our own- we talk about phone overs, gaze but scarcely Stephen give up your phone number on their renown, and you do you know it for everyone paragraph nine, us or dinosaur hot, like what it was in biogas, p b. and people. Just reciting there found covers the ass Linda, very, whose great comic book, artists and writer. I took a rating
class of hers and she does this exercise giving ample avow. If you draw memory, if you write about memories from your childhood, there much richer than adult, and then she goes. Here's an example: what's your first phone number and no it immediately right, everyone sort smiling and giggling. Everybody can recycle first phone number, and I should like ok habit to phone numbers ago. Even no fucking clue is who cares by that point in life dead inside that you just don't care. A phone is an exciting anymore. Some six to three two to one finds. I lose one by vibrate like yes, so this as COD Richard. Her Maris are almost turned my mom into a murderer: ok loving it dear Karen. just stash master, CNN and fluff muffins no and that so I thought those last shared unacceptable came first,
Thank you for organizing pine cast. It has made the gym infinitely more tolerable and has given my Marino, mind an insane amount of joy to be grateful for what's nice yuruk. Second, you know that the only reason I heard the story is that I finally cornered my mother into listening to your podcast Haswell Road trip. We finish the first episode and I looked at my mom nervously, calculating how long I was gonna. Take murder announced me sick bastard and she pensively said there here. The time I thought Richard Mares was going to kill me fucking, sign bar. I probably should have heard this story. When I told her, I worked at a show about night about the night soccer, but whatever my parents living Anaheim and early eighties, they were there Her past our walls, my mom had a terrifying term scary time areas Gary's, I'm I had one too. I was a few months old and my older brother was three
I got mother was a nurse also living and working in the area who happen to live across the street from one of her co workers who, incidentally, was attacked by Romania's she survived and ended up by anything later, a unifying later in court. Anyway, moms friends, coworker had been attacked in the house who are living in was walk of houses that, for the most part had this, and this is an all cap, super say sliding last or in the bag and heart. No, these site, citing glass doors or a phase of America's to get into houses the exits that little clicking law. We have one of those shoe and we did in the favour of never locking it. Oh that's nice, a boot! That's I feel Those lining last doors are like a part of seven these serial killers, part of the horror yeah. I don't think
the sound of escalating last orbiting quietly opened at night. Now totally, I don't think in my entire childhood. Was there ever everything on the on the ground floor, including the doors and windows it everything locked one time when it was all closed up just a different time and in reality stupid time and a stupid reality in unamended anywhere in the middle of the night. While my dad was away on business trip, my mom woke up to the door Bell ringing Norma like any responsible woman alone to children in the middle of the night. During an active serial killers rampage she opened the door. Is the next door neighbours girlfriend. She said that her boyfriend wasn't harm, but she was too scared to go under house because she swore she heard someone in there and true horror, films, fashion, my mom thought, cool I'll, take you and your boyfriends house and show you there's nothing to be afraid, so that
who unarmed young women go into a house all alone and choose to tour of the house, turning the lights on one they go into a room and then off so that electricity money honeys wets anyway, they get to the last room in the house which is kind of a lofty area on the second floor, there's a door and for while also it sounds like a regular room to me, but that's how my mom described it anyway. I hear the sliding glass I then they hear the sliding glass door open. I just have to point out that, yes, I have a hard time speaking, but Stephen printed, unlike eleven point, forty, a M decisions that it certainly passiveaggressive delay. He printed up these stories. It's like he wants me to fail at his ease against us. That's clear and we're just gonna keep on seeing the ass
lemon. As luck would have it. They happen to be in a room where the neighbour kept his pistol. The girlfriend who PS is twenty years old, takes out the gun. My mom takes up again, mom takes the gun from her and calls out no one response when they hear footsteps coming up the stairs. Here's what to point out. My mom is about ass. She grew up on a farm and knows how to use firearms and always has a manicure agora, permanent manicure and check the safety and aimed directly to the left of the door at the frame, the door
Hence my Mama gesture aim and notices that the person coming through the doors bald richer Ramirez. If you remember, had straight up a doll, Sassou curls. So I remember they work currently more waves. It was my dad mama who shot my dad. He come back early from a business trip and when he found mom has gone from the house, he went to check the next door. The porch light was on the front. Door was locked, so he went around the back and found the backsliding glass door open, not just a lot
fully share, humiliated anger, concern and thought something bad might have happened so, instead of calling nine when one he just went up the stairs without announcing himself while Super Galleon, almost gotcha. So as far as my hometown murder, this specific closet thats, it is missing the murder part but narrow, but very narrowly, and I had this energy because it's a funny story. Please keep up the amazing show: stay sexy, don't get murdered. Ps Eu inspired me to teach my cat ATLAS stored cookie, and he now like Elvis and it makes me- feel warm and fuzzy Lamb J D, fun unbundling, that reminds me of the people that we met at the meeting greed in Anaheim and it was a mother are, and the man was there the day that richer mares was running through that neighbourhood in was a boil high, its yes or no doubt down there. Re spoil hides what it was tat. She was there. She he got caught in friend of her house. Oh
right. Then the hops got him down on the ground because the cause the now. I think that they, I don't know something. It was in front of her house where he got because of a block along the street, where they and the monkey sing that everyone all her neighbours we're just going outside and leg and like a whom watching and being apart, and she was telling people to go back inside right. She was like they were so crazy over which just like there is a serial killer, lose so funny. I was, though, I told the Miser starstruck to meet. You gotta be right there scene of the crime. Ok, this subject line of this is my mom would probably get arrested if she did this today. I love it hey Emma calm down when I was a teenager, I was obsessive scary movies and my mom loved Halloween, my birthday in October, so on my thirteen or fourteen, where they decided to have a sleep over now where we plan to watch a scary movie and just hang out when my friends and I settled into arch psycho in the living room. My mom left us there to go pick up
pizza. I know what she's gonna do this also seen my parents living room was a big open space at a huge glass door out to the deck in one direction connected to the kitchen in another direction and the failure in the front door. The other way around after my mom left as we watch the movie in the dark. A large man being began pounding on the back door. He standing on the deck looking and we of course jumped up and began running in all directions and began scream you're, probably thinking oh no than they owe them. They called nine one one. No, we why I dont know other than to say that teenagers are really fucking stupid, sometimes just as we began to calm down and try to figure out what to do. a pounding, came from the front door as I moved Lord the door again. Why you stupid stupid girl this large man stacked his hand in the door and began waving it around yelling, something I don't remember now I slammed the door
And locked it just moments later and mind you, we were still running around screaming and not calling. I wonder why we heard the garage door open up. My mom walked in, as we have said. Quickly tried to tell her what happened. She seemed I too believe us holding it together only for a few moments and then dissolved into laughter. That's right! My own mother, recruited our neighbour down the street to stage a mother fucking break them just to scare us? Can you imagine if she pulled that shit today she get arrested or at the very least, child services would be called, like surprisingly, I've no lasting damage from this incident, and it did go down as a great sleep over according to my private mega thanks. So much for everyone feels crazy, awesome community. These created the I myself am I've met. group of women who are helping me achieve my wildest crazies dream of writing a book. As De Gm K. That's awesome That's so rob I keep thinking about like what. If they had Granby knife, I would have stab at hand It is the worst in a civil war.
Stadia it's the worst idea and at the same time that's like a knife. Virgil, destroy my crew Z friend Brian, who a historic at the gap left by who one time told me a story that he thought was really funny where he broke into his friends house. Wearing a pantyhose on his days, no with a knife in his hand, now crawled into has it her kitchen window a female yes and she kept him in the ball and beat the shit out of them, and then he got really mad at her and when and then she was like I'm not hug. You anymore he's like one What's funny all my work, Ass Hall, where you love Maria, really hilarious, he he does I was like when he told me for air was laughing, but I was like brain. What is wrong with you you're you're such like a guy. You don't understand why that is the scariest possible they re and why this personal and never want to speak to you build rightly so, o Brien
Brian, also imagine having a thirteen year old. You have to hate them so much at that point that you just want to talk with them, so good for them on. Yes, she was lying. My sanity left. Let me get you give your perspective, all the things you. We are black, crying and pouting about round the house here. Let's give you a little: does anybody s reality army, giving down several reality together, pay it than the actual fact give hates? You know your mama's bullshitting you if she goes to pick up a pizza in this area from nineteen to seventy nine on whenever they invented by taking a pizza. No mother goes to pick up either saying why Terry Canada, let's take out yeah, take out pizza taking any food. Ok, we're done we're alone Well, this one is called plan, so this is good son subjected ban just plain fine, now fan caps. Tat tat was the vat to the Son of SAM Dog for eight years ago.
Karen Georgia, seamen and assorted menagerie. Yes, I'll make this short, because we all make this because being feature on in Emma family. Be amazing, second waited to do a bit. Those two things don't necessarily directly relate, but ok they now although short, unlike or long and good just go Is this common denominator, hence have Hence I am going to read the sense. Thank you using hands at the end of the sentence. Hands like ties, while the other yeah during after the Son of SAM Murder spree my stepped out, was a young veterinary school graduate New York. He worked in that clinic. trying to pay off his student loans and avoid getting elbow deep in a sick cow upstate. Oh the clinic, he worked. I was also the clinic for the dog in your recent son of SAM episode,
the dog that was supposedly a demon was this sweet, chunky, Labrador, name Harvey, and then she says, I'm not that shaming, I'm pretty food motivated to anyway. The way my maybe it is that is yes, says a dog is food motivated and it's me: can you just wait till you have your motivations in certain places. I love the idea of a sweet chunky, Labrador, name Harvey speaking Satan on he's. Looking up at the window being like did you ve gotta began me he's, like bacon. You know this, isn't me he's looking at first going bacon. Do you bake, anti of bacon. Will then don't involve me in your bullshit right. That's all! I want an obvious, ok anyway, the way my step that tells the story is that late at night, when he had to stick around four charting and cleaning, he was one he was once along with this dog in an empty clinic once
he made sure he was alone. He asked the dog straight out whether he was the devil. The die said no, but the cat is a real asshole. He likes to get a big laugh out of it. As you know, Berkowitz admitted that he was making up all that for the insanity plea, but Thou is one of my quote: hometown murders anyway. Thank you for all your hard work and for the laughs you always remind me to assess e g M Love Kalen, oh my god that so funny in such a step that joke itself, but the cat is a real asshole. It's such a dad just such a definition, so hilarious, but also like just that. You would You would have to wait till everyone laughed, he would have to re or alone in the whole clinics so that no one thought you were the insane. I wonder if everyone is gonna sketched out by that dog at that point. The poor dog just like these, we so nice to me here, yeah now
get tied to a tree and no bacon. The devil is in the devil, Harvey's the devil, real funny hurry. What happened a harley. He lived a good long line. He got so much bigger, all cowboy actually, but as owners or way nicer to him after Keziah, her, like, oh, my God, away from our sun Harvey our Sun larvae pay check out. One of articles, newest outdoor, looks garden. Terrace this hand, kick series feature is laid back: elegant designs for outdoor lounging, dining and more. Lunch in the garden. Yes, please article combines the duration of a boot cheek furniture store with the comfort and simplicity of shopping online. There, too
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I was doing a little extra to serve pen era, get afraid every person, your first order from an era of fifteen dollars or more order through the grub have app or online grub hub. We serve restaurants. this is pretty good. The subject line, as my mom survived Cleveland and nineteen- seventy eight greetings. Editions, all humans and animals associated with the aim of em brand us my sister, and are dismayed your part just six months ago over since I've been nothing but bench listening laughing at work and checking every closet in my apartment. When I get home at night, I grew up outside Cleveland, as did both my parents and my mother worked at a convenience store in willowy. Ohio called Lawson's when she was an early twenties can be, will lack. It could be Willow, Wick occupied for all of them below a coil Eric, one night and they soon aid. She was closing the store, whether Coworker Bonnie, because it was
ok, so I'm everyone's nameless Bonnie. Why their bodies anymore. There is a body count over who I went to grammar school with and she still isn't Petaluma and I we talk to each other on twitter, but she's had been named. However, I want a new body she's, the original. Oh you on new baby, I wanna Bonnie that was born in the two thousands we, if you ever. Born in the two thousands. We love to see a picture. I even if it's a dog, money, money money, also lower wages above a through, haven't, I mean embody if you have a picture of a funny name by that's one of those really big one like this, like the size of his hair, yadda rabbit. So actually was. Certainly I was just want the one Petra Gay Bonnie, the bunny. That's here, please, there's gotta be hashtag. Ok, ok, so Barney among or it will, though, allowing Lawson's cash
they're closing up. When two men come in wearing black trash bags from head to toe, mom says that she initially thought it was to neighbourhood teens. They were coming from I'm the time to put trying to play a prank on them because of the nineteen seventy eight one of the men was holding a revolver and ordered my mom and Bonnie to open the register and save and then laid down face down on the floor with their hands at their sides. They did the cash register and then stepped over the women to get to the save the whole time my mom was signed. While Bonnie was hysterically, praying out on a series of down funny be cool at some point said quietly to my mom that she was quote glass and she had already marked the floor. Sambo like a vow money. These handling, like everybody, is new and they stayed like that until they heard another customer come in asking if any
one was in the store. Apparently the two men had left other back exit, while the Ladys worker up front lay on recently, floor, the police were called, but as far as my long can remember known as arrested for the robbery, she and Bonnie got a whopping twenty five dollars each from LA sends. Why? Because they as, as did the thirty me incident ninety seven dollars today in today's much more and luxuries, given the four hundred laws it is, they really took one for you they want and for the max. I think nowadays, you there's like we some LOS Angeles, but I think there's like a victim crime find that you like I knew a girl who got held up at gunpoint like a salon. She worked like she was the receptionist and there she was closing up and get help compliant and like got all this money inches. Just like I'm
dramatize. So I don't know what to do with this. It feels Rhine now Moliere that everything about that would be so hard has you lived and it's ok and what then it's not ok, bathing shoot, use it. You gotta beauty, school and then became too. onto inherit, stylist or sound fuck, yeah, yeah sort of her. I mean bad. Things are seeds that, our fruit into good thinking. So I guess you know that good get through great for it. we agree that a great great for the greatest Stena with Bonnie that is a very seventies fruit that great with American or Jerry and let her come on dieters. Ok, this is When I found out my dad kidnap people, he care in Georgia. Stephen and pet menagerie nice I'll, try and keep ashore. When I was eleven, my dad took me on a trip to LOS Angeles. He was really excited because I was really
because I gotta see my family and never gonna go with him before he said it was a work trip he'd make time for me or think stab. I mean very your fuckin thing. Emily. What an honor I now to be paid attention to, as I shall my most important thing in my life is work, but I will make time for this less important thing of you. My child listen block out. Seventy seven, thirty, four, the old, Daddy ill, we're gonna watch theories have together. That's right. You gonna, Fuckin tv dinner, ok one evening at dinner, team TV, He asked me what I knew about ports at eleven. My answer was nothing. My dad person to explain what they were to me and told me the red, the real reason for the trip? He had been hired by parents to kidnap someone and do depot a deprogramming job. Her dad was a deep programmer fur coats. I had a brief moment of wondering if he had once kidnap me fairer, fuckin, aside
but suddenly all those warnings about vans and the game where we tailed people at the mall quote to show how easy it was to follow someone Anglo made. A whole lot more sense. Oh my guy! That's where the following game come on. Daddy, wants to play the gig and reflects a silence or God he liked as to always be prepared and would hide in bushes and jump out and wanted us always to be ready. This is
culture, the biggest gotta. He wonders why I need an tangs. Eighty medication equate how he wonders. I need antagonist. Exactly medication is beyond me. Yes, he will play a game. He would jump out from the bushes, so they be prepared. Gad knock it off. I bet he was fuckin pistol in time. She kicked him in the desk at that was her preparation. No, he was because he was wearing a company is less priority action here now Zactly I e the year mice and say whatever the fuck, then all caps- and this thanks giving I found out that my mother was a getaway driver for one of these jobs, the other guy, The way driver had a drop out the cops we're onto him since he had quote, killed some people, since he didn't take shit from any one and then says I'm what tat Apparently my mom poses a nurse and helped kidnap actual double meant twins with my father. There's a lot. Gone off the rails entirely. This chick is like I'll, try
keep it short like him. Then please write us for more pages of what the fuck is going on needs yeah. You need to write and true true novel. Tat. Monsieur us turn out they weren't in occult but needed to call their dad because he was controlling and was calling DE programmers because they weren't talking to him anymore. Why so? The twins, Father may twins had stopped talking there, other he probably sucks. So he had started how indeed programmers to be like MIKE. I can learn and call, but can you ve got kidnapped and the kids are like? No, we just hey funding controlling shitty down once our double meant money. I once I D woman money because they weren't talking them anywhere. Luckily, they were so mad at their father that they didn't call the police on my parents. Well, this is the only couple. This is only a couple of wild stories. I've learned from my family s show it is true, that the dead was a copy programmer. Yes, it was just in that one instance: it wasn't it
but they were right. I just want to get the fuck away from my right ass. You, yes, ok, that was your submission for us to give you a book deal and yes, her Book imprint is coming as we have decided to start a book company and you're our first. And we began with a subject like my mom- survived a clown high Karen. Georgian Stephen you're, all bad bitches. Yes, Stephen you doing here, I was think you'll be after tea. I was about when I was about nine. I was at school and my mom was about to fight a fucking clown so a pretty regular mourning for my mom she's drinking coffee and getting ready and she's goes too. but more cream in her coffee. She ceased something out of the corner of her eye and She turns and seas a clown. No, no! No! No really. It was just a guy with a Halloween clown mask on as she drops the Kremer and coffee and run this on her our way out of the kitchen he
extra down and she had her head on the hardwood floor. She will get regains her bearings in time to see him raising knife and she'd deflects it with her arm on her neck a moment later like in this, then it at that time. She goes oh fuck. I need to fight and hits the guy's straight in the nose with her. Which is smoking Classic Self Defense Class re fucking poem in the nose break. It ended our brains and She drove him offer awesome. She runs to the bedroom grabs a gun turns around Adcox it right as he's in the doorway Ali share. Guess, apparently he cut his way through this, screen and the open kitchen window from the back yard and climbed in this is why I am never gonna live on a fucking ground for real the guy didn't caught until years later, when one the same thing that the cops got there in time to catch him. Meanwhile, my school went on lockdown and I've.
That was why is this girl Press, the room crying, we're gonna be ok, as she only told me after I saw the twenty eighteen winter door, Ngos O the guess you means her mom Marmara only told her after she saw the twenty eight in winter door, and she does want to hear how I almost got murdered. What the fuck Thank you also much MAC holy shit I mean daddy. I was we would like, and it turned out to be. Your neighbors were tending to scare who know no unreal hammer mom saved it until we very recently in her mom mom, did even tell her when she was in school lockdown that that was the owner that, because any act came around we got you gonna change screens packing bad ass, also just bone showing it sounds like happy when you hear but you're in York in your kitchen, like stirring up her coffee, just react, wrap it up to go to work and you turn there's a clown and your career doing in the class. No did not
I now I reject you and I reject Satan. Will you represent us right? That was such a good, bad yeah, and thank you for listening in writing and we we love it and say: Saxony now, get murder goodbye alliance receive Mimi, won't now again, yeah Mimi, Wanna, cookie, all those who want to cookie do when cookie
Transcript generated on 2021-07-22.