« Oprah’s SuperSoul Conversations

Sharon Stone

2021-03-31 | 🔗

World-renowned actress, mother and activist Sharon Stone discusses her revealing new memoir, The Beauty of Living Twice. In it Sharon reveals, for the first time, the trauma and abuse she suffered as a child. She discusses her near-death experience and recovery from suffering an almost fatal stroke. Sharon also shares behind-the-scene stories from the famous interrogation scene in Basic Instinct.

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
I'm over Winfrey welcome to supersede conversations the podcast, I believe, one of the most valuable gives you can give yourself is time taking time to be more fully present. You journey to become more inspired and connected to the deeper world around us starts right now Sharon. Stone is a world renowned actress, sex, simple mother of three and a Nobel Peace Summit Award winning philanthropist. Growing up Sharon along Apparently there are three siblings. A rule town in Pennsylvania by nineteen. She moved to New York City to work as a model ninety ninety sure and found her calling landing a role in the safe. I actually hit totalled recall
Opposite Arnould Schwarzenegger it was Sharon's magnetic performance and that infamous interrogation scene in the erotic. Thriller basic instinct made A superstar. Sure and went on to win a golden glow and ask your nomination for Martin Scorsese use casino. She won an image of a role on the practice: Sixty three sharing is written and insightful new memoir, the beauty, of living twice where she opens. up about her public triumphs and private sorrows sharing stone. I am so happy to welcome you to Superstore Oprah. I am so happy to be
with you re, no, where I'd rather be. Thank you for that. You know you're in a studio, in LOS Angeles. I just want to say this and I am in my flower garden in Maui through the magic of tech we get to be together today. Gotta love a green screen during these covert times. That's why I want to start by asking for itself: how are you and your family being I'm so sorry to hear about the loss of your godmother and do the cove aid. I understand you also lost her dear friend my adopted grandma yeah yeah. I saw that Instagram that was so powerful and I want you to scream out against this thing bridling, because I don't want her to die alone. I want her to hear You re John, against the dying of the light. Its devastating. I mean at this point that was back in April. I thought what you said was so heartfelt in literally penetrating I just felt like if we could, just
clay respond and if we could all wear masks, we could stop this. It just is so disheartening. Diseases said five hundred thousand deaths that so easily could have been prevented. How are you in your boys, personal Leumi, coping, have you d spent at home with the boys? Well, I have three boys puberty and I'm in late stage menopause. So I can say that there is a lot of hormones in my house and now it's a lot of energy to be inside all the time, like a lot of parents. My hair is standing on end. Well, you got through it, we're getting throw it, and you know I remind
near the story? You tell in your beautiful memoir the beauty of living twice where your father's talks about Babe Ruth Jesse and going up to bat, and you just have to keep getting up to back and yet what we all had to do. Yeah and I think For some of us we are a little bit luckier than others. I feel this situation with the increase in poverty and the decrease in empathy that we have so much to learn, and I feel that this is the benefit of covert that I have learned about each other, because we ve had to learn about ourselves. All of these different movements that have happened during this time have been extraordinarily educational. I think we ve learned so much through black lives matter, and I think this is the very
act that we now know what red lining actually is, and we start to understand the way that our country has been divided and we are forced to sit down, stay at home and actually learn. Something has been so beneficial to us as a nation. What, personally did black lives matter? How did it enhance enlighten, impress you I'd say and in several different way, First of all, I was really delighted to get the education of exactly I mention red lining, because I thought it was really beautifully finally told in a very specific and edges in a way that no longer could be denied by all same people cannot be denied by all same played. Yes, let's talk about this memoir, the beauty of living twice. It is me, I say it's a great red and.
now here you had to go through so many harrowing experiences in your life. I think that People were actually find it really comforting and and and healing for them to know that you ve been through that, and that means it's possible to get through it, and the title comes from when you suffered a massive brain aneurysm, which we ve spoken up before, but I understood it in a way that I hadn't from what conversations we ve been having since we first started talking about eight years ago, so I had this feeling I sat down on the sofa and it just it hit me in the head so hard that I fell over myself. Well, like really like I felt like I must have been shot and doktor said I don't. Got even recognizes that you had a one percent chance of survival. So what were the chain of events that got you too, that gurney
I love that moment, you're on the journey and among the journey, and you say, tat the doktor, your fire deleting in your brain Sharon's stone. You are believing in your brain, but you find the strength to stand up to tell the doctor you're fired so get us to that chain of events. First of all, I think my will survive was strong because of many of the things I went through prior to this, so when they were shoving me through to exploratory brain surgery And I didn't know it and suddenly I came to being we all down the hallway too, and I didn't know where I was
one and I asked the orderly any told me. I was going to exploratory brain surgery that no one had explained to me. I was so shocked at I just thought or no this can't be me. Oh no and I said, but why but wait, and he said we can't wait or we will lose. The operating rules means the room and I submit stop. Someone has to explain this to me: no theirs no time no there's no time, and he said no, the doctors already ordered it and I said, stop stop stop and he wouldn't stop the gurney. So I realise the only way I can get him to stop was if I stood up on the journey and at this point already been bleeding into my brain, for probably, I think at least four days. I just didn't know what else to do, and so a kind of pulled myself up on my knees and, of course, my Gown is flapping open. My ass is hanging out and the doktor came.
running down the hallway any had this facts, any kept. He's yelling at me he's telling me to sit down and do what he's telling me too, and then he took the facts and because I have a fax from people magazine and that's when I realized that he was not right. Yeah, I just thought is more interested in my fame and in beings AMOS, then magazine- is contacting him. Then he is in being a good doctor to me, and so I looked at him and I realize oh, my god, I'm in terrible trouble then suddenly the nurses and all the order, everybody came running out because it was such a scene, and I said I need you to explain to me what exploratory surgery is, and he said, I need you to lay down and do what I'm telling you to do, and I said I'm not going to do
since you tell me what it is, and he said I don't have to tell you anything. This has already been handled. Oh my gosh, your doktor was going to operate on you yeah and I didn't know what to do, and I looked at him and the facts and I said, you're fired and he said you can't do that and the the head nurse God. She said. I think she did sir. I think she did and he told the orderly take her back to her room and he said you are not allowed to do that and she said Sir she's cognisant she speaking fluidly. She knows what she's talking about she's going back.
A room, sir? Until I discovered so she told me, she was the nurse who told the orderly to take you back to your room and told the doctor that I had the right to say that he was fired and I love she saved my life. Yeah. I do too it's a boy Tommy MILES and I'm back at it again ready to return this season of ring and achieve some. Our homes used, but I'll be helping twenty eligible single spine. Something real then there's more than a few surprised along the way. What parts ready love his five I'll get. The lonely hearts of the long, lasting shrewdly season, premier Friday April, second, nine, eight central on the creator of green leaf and executive producer. Oprah winfried comes owns, newest scripted, drama series, Delilah D. I ll economy played by Mara Hill as a single mother and respected attorney
when an old friend is in need of help. Delilah will find herself in the midst of a David versus Goliath. Case will test her relationship with her best friend and fellow attorney camera play by Jean Marie Jones. Well seeking justice for those who need it most in a time when the rich and powerful will do anything to stop her, Delilah will find herself risking at all for the truth. Delilah is all new tuesdays. Nine, eight central on our own. You say on page twenty one now I know that we are not far apart. They are not far away. We do not lose their love, and you know this because one night you say I woke to my and Mother Lila damning added up, I thought of my bed. I know that sounds reasonable. Examining my grandmother had been
bad for thirty years. She said we don't really know what's wrong with you, we are working on it, but whatever you do, don't move your neck, so this was one of those visitations well by that time. I had been bleeding into my brain for probably a week and had been on lauded twenty four seven, so whatever it was, it also saved my life because my dad had brought me a teddy bear, and so I slid to this.
The bed and I stuff the Teddy Bear in behind my neck, so that I couldn't move so that I did what the apparition of my grandmother told me to do, and I believe it saved my life because it was my vertebral artery that was ruptured here in the back of my neck and by the time I actually did get these surgery that I needed. My artery was just hanging by a very fine thread and I was so close to death when they finally did decide that they would grant me a second operation and found it and save my life after a very long surgery of
implanting coils in the back of my neck, where the artery used to be so winded. You have the near death experience. Where are you in when I first got to the hospital that was an emergency room right right when I finally first got to the the first hospital tell us what that was like? Well, this is superficial, so where we could hear it, ok, Orang! Well, I I've, I only got to the hospital about three days into the bleed. I think I was unconscious when they did the first cat scan and when I woke up the doctors talking to me, yes and he was kind, he was so kind and then I I was gone and I felt this kind of was like this whoosh kind of experience and I was going exhorted up and the light was very bright and I
traveling really fast, and I saw people not only that I had lost, but that I had been very, very, very close to at the end of their lives and it was like they were kind of looking at me This way, like kind of looking at me, like here and we you again, but they were a sort of looking down like they were waiting for me and I had to sit credible sense of well being away for happy
And then, just when I was really getting into the good feeling I have this feeling on my chest. Like I've been kicked by a meal at was a vote, and suddenly I was awake and I just looked around and the doktor there was another person there over the doktor was like don't anybody's hatch, I don't touch her, don't touch her and then he said that there was a transfer ambulance coming to take me to this neurological, Hospital with especial neurological, intensive care. Word you right in the beauty of living twice. Now we see where their title comes from for real, you write that you made a decision in the emergency room or a choice to live, explain What that was like in how you were able to choose to live? Well, you know that
happened to me right after nine eleven. It was like nine twenty one. So when I came to in the second hospital I was in a circular. Ward, it's just a ring around nurses station and all their just drapes, sanctioning us off so you're, very close to the other patients, and the guy straight across from me, died in for of me so watching this man die and his machines. Turning off and then them taking him away and then taking the machines away and then his bedding, I mean it, but it's very, very, very real
the Gue realize it's a choice and your bed is on a scale and they discuss how much body mass you're losing an you recognize like. This is up to you here number, but you'd lost a lot. I mean you just to leeward allies. Railway percent of my body mass- they also you you also say death- is so mere, and it's not a scary thing, it's very near and safe, how, I think pretty every people who watch this programme and understand that there is a life beyond are physical being that that is somehow comforting to believe. But how do you know it the death is safe. Well, a lot of things have happened to me. In my life, I've been an HIV Aids worker for twenty seven years, so I ve spent a lot of time with people in intensive care
who are dying with HIV Aids and some of them are infants and toddlers and little children, and some of them are the parents, the mothers who will die before their children and there have been times when I've had a numerous times when I've had to stand with the parents who are losing their infants and toddlers and explain to them that they have two days three days five days. So I've been through this process, which is so intimate and so intimate with death. I imagine nothing is more intimate. You know you described in the book, the love that you felt when you had that experience. Was it like a force or a knowing a lot of people prayed for me
And a lot of people that I wouldn't have expected, you know you don't expect a lot of like letters from Hollywood lawyers they took time out of their data pray for you know you don't write restaurant staff prayed for me on their bricks, people that you would think You know wow wow. I felt that I literally was so blown open by what was happening to me that I was without reserve or guard or shield. I felt that coming to me, I felt coming at me, you write a found, a love that was so much more a real love, a true love. No, I didn't get the fairy tale. I got real life, yeah yeah. You also get a sense of yourself. That's very freeing and that's also quite intimidating.
When you know that people will love you and really love you might not have ever liked you at all, that's incredibly freeing yeah Even you have that moment were you'd call your mom, your mom fell apart, but yet she
in your dad, we're there the next day and she comes to the hospital and she put your hands on your patient and for the first time you say you felt loved by her. Yes, it took seven years. You say seven years to recover from your stroke. But what do you mean when you say you lost your beauty? Do you mean the power of it? My radiance went away. It isn't so much your beauty as your radiance. It's a radiance magnetism and presents grass a presents, a vibrancy that comes from first of all from health. It comes from health and well being and well being and youth, and I think there
that's. It comes your confidence to, and I think that, when you're in this kind of business that were in may start telling you that you don't have it any more and you start believing it. Oh yeah. They also tell you that by this age, you won't have it anymore, and here by a certain age, you won't have a. Yes, and when I'm finding now is that I'm gaining at this age, a different kind of radios, and that the thing that I thought I lost with something that.
I dont think I ever really needed to begin with. So I'm wondering after you are the it woman for the times after basic instinct. How do you not spend the rest of your life chasing that moment and the IRA around that moment in time? What for me, you know that was a character that I played, but in the business they want you to keep being a thing that worked YAP and for me that was a character, and that was a character that for me was far afield, but we also decided that if we made my pr personality like me, the girl that sets at home and reads books, that was, it
Very interesting cell, so we chose a kind of pr personality for me that was also an act. I think that is what I understood more clearly than I ever have, and all the conversations I've had with you in reading the beauty of living twice is that really was. I always knew that it was a character, but this was a persona that was created. You know you know what made that clear to me than anything. There's a moment in this book at school. You were at recess and here come these girls and you describe the golden light on their hair and they were like the goddesses and they were the it girls and their coming towards you and you so delighted that, oh my gosh, they see
and they're going to say something to me in over there they are and then and then the girl, the IT girl, comes up and tell that story. Will you I'm still struck by that story? Cuz, I'm thinking. If that it happened to me, how do you get through the rest of your school year so explain the story first for everybody I was this kid that was accelerated kid, so I was younger than everybody else and very very shy. So I'm on the playground with pay one friend and weary, with our books on the playground, cause I'm pretty awkward and so the important cute girls all start coming over, and I think- and I look at my friend and I think they're went to maybe they're going to talk to us and maybe they're going to like us and maybe they're going to include us- and I know I'm thinking- oh my god they're coming over to us. You know
come up and of course, I'm sorry leaning end like this. It's a big moment and the girl slap me across the face, and then she turned to her friends and they all started laughing at and I was so startled and they didn't want to cry. But you know the tears just sort of start. John out like cartoon tears, and I went and sat with my back against the wall, I was so freaked out. a man, the Bell rang and I went into the bathroom and I look in the mirror and our handprint was not my face and I couldn't get it off. Remember washing my face, you sit in the book that you kept hearing their laughter all through the day. In all, I ask that image of you, leaning back against the wall. Bidding for recess to be over. Ok, so my quite a lot at stake in the bathroom waiting for the handprint to go away you now because they don't want other people to see it is how that, how does that? not defying,
you are in that world school and your place in that for years to come. I am still a little like that. You know I go into events, and I see the group of the girls that are all that thing or I go to a party, and I see all the girls under that thing and then I go sit with sort of girls that I think are a little girls like me like the little more shots, either the more reserved the more don't know who to talk to, and I still dial had a kind kind of throw in like I don't know quite what I'm supposed to say why this is so interesting, because before reading the beauty of living twice, I would have thought you would have been that
girl? I know that you yeah, I know what I been out, our own, that all the other eye. All the girls are, yes, ok, I know individual living twice. You share for the first time the trauma of violence and abuse you suffered as a child. So what happened to you sharing my grandmother? Assisted my grandfather, my grandfather was a pedophile, but my grandfather beat my grandmother nearly every day of her life, my mother told me that the last time she saw my grandfather alive. He beaten my grandmother so badly that her face was black and blue. She had handprints around her neck and her hand, arms and her legs were black and blue. He died a couple of weeks later and my mother said that she was so glad that he died because she had such a rage that she went into it.
But my grandmother was so beaten down by my grandfather that she not only did not protect us. She stood by as he was abusing me, certainly, and you write that it took you years of therapy and attending twelve step meetings to actually recover from the abuse, and you now identify as an incest survivor. Yes, I went to twelve tap incest, survivor meetings. There must have been very difficult to navigate while you're still also known as this famous SEC symbol. Well, I have to say that those meetings are exceptionally private. and its run normally by a trained professional there, a little different than other kind of twelve step meetings and in those meetings were doctors, lawyers
police people. There were a lot of people who took positions of authority. I found- and I was really surprised- and it gave me a whole different perspective on how to address and deal with this until that release. My own shame, because it's not my shame to care. No, no, no! I'm one on for you, sir. I felt rage and indignation and I responded with condescension and cruelty, false kindnesses, an artificial patients toward my mother. Eventually I face myself and stop my relationship with my mother. It's because you
I bet she could have done something or could have done more. I had no idea who my mother was. I had no idea about anything because my grandfather threatened to kill me if I said anything to anyone and that threat was reinforced and reinforced reinforce reinforced. So even though, as a kid growing up, I shared a room with my sister. I couldn't tell her so I had a separate childhood from my sister. I was very separate from everyone, because, when you're carrying the threat that someone's going to kill you you don't I share your life with people, so this is so fascinating to make basic instinct made you a household name, and you played Catherine, of course, the sociopath a killer
and now I know from reason book that you use the pain of your childhood abuse of commercial player. Of course, can explain more about that. Well, when I read the script, I watched a lot of film on serial killers talking about their stories. Why they did it why they were glad they were imprisoned in what they were doing, and I started putting a lot of these things together from I'm, I'm a big researcher. I do. Parts yeah and what I believed about the character was that she believed that what she was doing was right and valid and that there was a reason for it. But then she lost all sense of moral certitude, real right and wrong because it had been taken away from her. That was something that I needed to work out for me, so that I could play the part three
I got it so I want to set the record straight. Why were you not wearing underwear in the interrogation leg crossing scene and what happens when you first saw it? I love what you with us about why you're not wearing underwear. Well in the sequence, I what I wore the day that we were shooting I had because the dress was white. I heard I'd, like thong underwear on when we were shooting the seed, we'd shot a couple of tax and the director said to me: we are seeing it it's glow, white when you cross your legs, its hitting the light is hitting it too much and we can see you have underwear if you take them off. We won't say anything: it'll just be a shadow, but we what we will gap that you don't have underwear. I said: ok, I took them off. We did this in the movie was done. I wasn't shown the film with just the cast, or with by myself I was shown the film
with a bunch of century city, attorneys like a fall screening room? Oh yeah? This is just the strangers in the lawyers and the Roman you yeah yeah. I was so shocked to protection bid and slapped the director and went to the car and called my lawyer and said my God and he said: don't even worry about it, they're not going to be able to release it because twenty five years ago, that would have been a triple x. Yes, so I was like ok cool, so I call the director and, unlike you, can't release it anyway. It's a triple x, so forget it yeah. So oh yes, we will and will do whatever we want and you don't have an opinion and basically that you're a girl so shut up. So I went home and I thought about it and I thought I'm gonna have to avert a fight, but I do have the ability to stop
But- and I gave it a few days- and I remember when I started working on this script- my teacher said you know: they're gonna cut this scene out of the movie unless every single second of the scene is so specific, they can afford to lose it. So you better be the best you ve ever been in this scene. You better nail this scene to the floor and I I thought I did nail that seem to the floor. They're not gonna, try to floor they're, not gonna, cut this scene, so I think what I really do is just shoot it right through the heart and I think I'm gonna take this risk. I think I'm gonna jump off the waterfall. Well, we're, u nailed it. Male did mailed it to the floor. Did you recognise the trajectory had taken you in a different direction?.
you're, sitting in the premier. Now now the lights come up. I think we don't have any idea in the moment of these transitory moments in our life. I think we have any idea when fame heads us in the face what's happening, I dont know we have any idea until years later that these are the moments and I think, even the horrible moments. I don't think we have any. Ten years later, how funny they are gonna, be I wish we did you now for such a time as this. This book is coming out the beauty, living twice at a time when we all need a second lease on life and opportunity,
to begin again to begin a new to see ourselves differently. Why were you? Was this the right time? I think that, as we grow older, we have this societal pressure where people start to try to tell us that are worth is diminished, and I think that this is a time in our life when our worth is the most enhanced. I think when we're forty as women we get to this incredibly powerful plays, and it's the time when I have to say that I believe the white male society starts to
tell women you don't have worth is the first time when you're forty, when you're told you become you're worth, becomes less and I believe that's because it's the first time in your life, when you're worth becomes so much more yeah, you become the most powerful you ve ever been theirs. They actually there's this white male suppression, and so you are told you have no power, now you're not attractive, now, you're less now, and so there's this thing that you just get hit with a hit within hit with that's supposed to silence you- and I think this is a rather way planned, prepared an oppressive specifically so that women don't gain their own power. You know what it is share and you know what it is: its red lining: women, that's what it is. I made a painting exactly where I got out of bed in the middle of the night. I had this dream. I got up and painted- and I made this painting-
what makes women- and I read lined around the word woman, because I really felt I was being redlined as a woman- and I started thinking about this so deeply and specifically, what lack lies matter has done for me is teach me so much about the just a prayer.
In general, just oppression of anyone that anyone seas is more powerful than they are and more powerful in any way. There is this type of red line that occurs and inside, of course, people saw black people as more powerful. Of course, people saw women in this way as more powerful. Of course, people see that person is more powerful. So here's that oppression and I started thinking about all these different things and then you get to be sixty and you have that. Second, big understanding of life and that standing of self and then that big understanding of the world as a whole. This is the second time, then, that you're really powerful, and now I'm
going to let my radiance be taken away again. No, not this time, this I'm awake to this. I love it. That's what the sixties, therefore, that's what my said. Well in the end, you say this is what I have. I have my house, my story, my truth, which will not be true for everyone who stood next to me, which I have say. I think that such a powerful line, because you can have you and Kelly in the same room, sharing the same experience but not come away with the same, so I just love that line exact that it would not be true for everyone who stood next to me. You say time is changing. What is true every day. It is no longer healthy to be unkind. I have learned to forgive the unforgivable and my hope is
that, as I share my journey, you too well, to do the same so beautiful that you are offering the beauty of living twice to all of us and were willing to open up your soul to do that. Sharon stone! Well, Oprah, Winfrey, you did the same thing and I watched you go through it and I saw but it was not an easy journey because people want to make women or the men that this has happened to feel like somehow it's their fault or that there is no one. tell or that you will be hurt by telling your true story
And I think what we need to know now is that there are so many other people. My story is not so different than anybody else's story, except in the end, my job has a bigger window beautifully spoken sharing. Let me ask you a cup of super, so questions. Ok, so you just answer quickly during the pandemic. What is your favorite meal and who was at the table? My favorite meal. Was I learned to make a french rusty chicken, which I really wanted to learn and my kids were at the table? Did you field testing and what tested you the most? Oh, my god? Yes, I felt tested in my worth and value in my business life. I would say I started being told that I was too. Old, and that I wasn't had value anymore. Why did you recognising,
herself or in your life that you needed to change during your pandemic. I realized tat. I had to stop letting others defined my worth. I beg of you. If you did that the next big. That's big: where did you learn you could live without shared? I learned that I could live with out co dependence, and that is hard. Where did you learn? You could not live without I can't live without my children and I learned that it couldn't live without my mom and I now have the greatest relationship with my mom and she's at my house wow what happened? I wrote my first full draft of the book and then I read it to her and then I recorded her talking to me for a couple hours and then I went back and rewrote the
with her story in it wow, and then I knew my mom as an adult women adult woman and I understood the whole damn thing. And I realize that we were gonna need each other to figure it out and get through it, and we decided that we too were going to break the chain. That is some super sulphur healing. You know. I think that is the big mistake that I learned many years watching so many people experience terrible relationships with their parents. is you try to meet them where they were and where you were as a child, but it's coming to where you are, what made right now, I'm a woman you right now right. Yes, you did that. Yes,
he said to her, you know, there's no way we can go back. I think we have to sit down like two adults and talk about who we are and what happened just frankly, really, frankly, the whole truth- and I was so devastated to learn her story of depression era, girl with rickets and scurvy and. Sister, who was killed by a drunk driver, not right out of her hand and two other sisters that were terribly abused and beaten, and a mother who walked five miles to the welfare office to come home with zero dollars and fifty cents
I learned a lot lot and once you do that once you do that, you beat underground of women to women, are warned me, mother into mother and mother to mother full circle force right right. Thank you for that year and the beauty of a living twice is available on March Thirtieth, everywhere books are sold, in the world and share also reads the audio version that you're gonna love that I mean just to hear your voice speaking the words that are your truth. It's exquisite! So thank you so much Sharon for thinking in my garden with me today, thanks for having me I'm over Winfrey and you ve been listening to supersede conversations podcast, you can hello supersonic on Instagram, twitter and Facebook. If you haven't yet go to apple podcast, unsubscribe rate and review of this planet
join me next week for another super supersede conversation. Thank you for listening.
Transcript generated on 2021-03-31.