« Pardon My Take

Mark Titus and Colts Punter Pat McAfee

2017-01-05 | 🔗
NFL Wild Card Weekend and the guys are ready to break down every game in a highly detailed fashion (3:06 - 14:27). Embrace Debate, do you wear shirts when you sleep? (14:27 - 15:53) Friday Roasts (15:53 - 18:30). Recurring Guest Mark Titus joins the show to talk Grayson Allen, Coach K, NBA, and the time Tom Crean searched for a live bat (18:30 - 41:21). Segments include Man Card Nick Saban, bonus conversation figuring out how many times a year Coach Saban orgasms. Bad Visual for George McCaskey, Locker Room Talk, Mike Wilbon Name Drop Of The Week, and Uhhh Ya Think. Pat McAfee joins the show to finish the week off with a great round of Jimbos.
This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
today's episode of part of my take is brought to you by harry's razors harry's razors has that smooth great shave that you're looking for it's winter don't be that guy who shaves and has their face feel all scruffy an awful cold wind hitting your face harry's has it all and it feels great it's comfortable and it's smooth and they have the rich lathering shave gel a travel blade cover we ergonomic handle five precision engineered played with a lubricating strip and trimmer blade here is so confident in the quality of their blades they want you to try their shave set for free you heard that right just cover the shipping when you sign up and you get everything else for free here it is here's
you get take advantage of it you gotta herries dot com right now enter the promo code take t a k e at checkout to get a post shave balm also free that's herries dot com code take t a k e you're gonna love the shave you get with harry's do it now herries dot com promo code take today's episode also brought to you by c geek see kick is the best way to find the tickets you need for nfl playoffs nba season nhl season it and see double a basketball he has a great app that's really easy to use and the best part is they color code it for dummies like me so you can see on the map what's a good deal with an okay deal and what's a bad deal when you want to wait when you want to buy now that's all on the c key cap and it is great hundred percent guarantee so you can shop for tickets on seatgeek with confidence and here's the deal
got for you right now you go download the ccap you go to the settings tab and you click add a promo code enter the promo code take t a k e c k because send you twenty dollars after you made your first purchase that
is promo code take on the free c geek out at their protocol get twenty dollars and made your first ticket purchase let's go is that right well part of my take it is friday january sixth rents do while kerr weekend yes hold i think this
is probably if we're if we're doing a power ranking of sports weekends wild weekend is in my top three i love it i love all right off your other ones now okay yes sprung the let's just jump right on our eggs but where i think the show is going to be one of our best shows just on that out there why you gonna because we've already interview is fantastic with mark titus and we receive the gimbals with pat mcafee and those are fantastic yeah okay might my power rankings i've got wild card weekend called number two divisional weekends number one okay and then the first weekend of march madness number three and four or i'll give your fourth that weekend in may when it's like the kentucky derby there's always a big fight a play also started nhl playoffs are on that's going to there it is that's i think we now what
more of sports weekend yeah i think we just killed it yeah i'm not a big wild card weekend fan never really have a dog he already started this not really curable walk he couldn't even name the teams that were playing so as a guy and new england we don't really celebrate that kind of thing we're kicking it off on saturday awesome i said nor in wild card weekend body head body for kicking off texans raiders the ugliest game probably the wild card weekend is ever had it's the annual what do we call to beef o'brady's if houston texans full yeah afc s pole but there's a wrinkle brandon brandon weeden is lurking he's literally a heartbeat away he might be slipping something into brooks drink before the game you don't really need to do anything to have brock fuck up you stay out of the way of rock and he's going to screw it up i'm so yeah but if i know we did he's got all these old man prescriptions that he can just make sense we were talking about this we didn't like thirty five years old thirty three i said to you
he's thirty three years old he's been in the league for four years and you're like wait what it sounded believable up yet 'cause he was he did go to chris winky school college where he stayed in college forever and he was like twenty five when he came out call in oklahoma typically you're not smart to get into college still at least like two thousand four hundred and twenty five you know fenced or oklahoma listen some fifth grade you think brandon weeden did at least two yeah he did a couple did it a couple times the normally i wouldn't get excited about brock osweiler verse connor cook but i really do think there is a world where brock osweiler is brock osweiler 'cause that's who he is he's going to screw up he's going to suck the text will be down like maybe thirteen three in the third quarter brandon weeden instant office yeah i'm really excited about this and i'm rooting for the texans and here's why i was
thirteen to go so far in the playoffs that the are the houston texans better without jj watt takes start to heat up because if they win i'll see if they win two playoff games patriots yeah if they went to playoff games you're going to get those takes an i'm here for those i also ask the question if brandon weeden took the texans on a super bowl winning they won the super bowl this year would that be the greatest story sports story of all time outside of leicester city yes get leicester city people five thousand and one if you put some on his dick rapid arthritic scoliosis pens where we watch folks this is in reality brandon is not going to get in it's going to be the worst game ever and i'm going to be so upset at myself going to lose your whatever event yeah i'm facing the second game line seahawks i'm excited for this one because we get to see like dumb stupid matt stafford face with his backwards hat when like the twelves are going crazy and they're down twenty one three in
i'd say seven minutes into the game you're like oh him called well on the road with matthew stafford yeah and it's gonna be a night game and cocky pete carroll comes out at night like the gum smacking distracting he's yeah yeah yeah he's gonna get have brand new extralite shoes on day pete carroll thank that nine hundred and eleven was an inside job night pete caroll knows that eleven was an inside absolutely he's more woke at night he he he's nocturnal yeah be careful the owl dolphin steelers sunday the noon game or one o'clock game i'm going to say it right the dolphins uniforms are not playoff uniforms they aren't was hot take i know but it's the truth like they don't teal and like that
well not all that doesn't belong in the plant slowly sixty now it doesn't belong to i i i i agree with the cat because i don't like to be reminded other people live in warmer climates and i do yes and that's it's a it's a you moved to write the rest of america is wide dan marino never won the big one because he was always rock and he's happy pastels and thinking about all you know i could be on the beach right now right instead of you know going up against actual cities like pittsburgh right and they're like there's no place i'd rather be than on the gridiron and and you're absolutely right because the dolphins uniforms even when they're not playing at home you look at him and you're like oh will they play in warm weather just by looking at you know they're not candy that's what they're there can yes uniforms kenny as uniforms don't win champions let's bring back that were not like if i can yes yeah also here's how the dolphins are preparing humans versus the sun for you the dolphins are pudding balls in a freezer to prepare for pittsburgh weather love it so yeah
that's gonna work yeah that's definitely to work that's like but i think it was a story peyton manning made chess set pay manning jeff saturday stood in the showers for like four hours and stop balls themselves probably didn't hit us or i don't know maybe rocky yeah yeah that was a different story wash my back i'll say this though i am a boy big matt moore fan i know i've said before yeah i want to reiterate it that guy he's it's like a kid out there he's having fun little gunslinger i like him too i mean if you do an alliteration name i'm going to like you especially at the quarterback quarterback also he's one of how many mats do we have right now we've got matt on ryan stafford oakland oh my god it is automatically way too many mats at this is why the playoff suck we just found out you can have this many mats in the playoffs come on now i feel
at this point name your kid mad is cheating like yeah you just want to be a quarterback i get it what are the odds that we have four mats in the playoffs and none of them are the single team at well let's let's put some modular right now is a mat gonna win the super bowl what are the odds i would say the field i would say yeah mats are one meter three to one tom or that now 'cause the falcons is the only map that will have the chance i'm heavily waiting got it i'm heavily weighted patriots ok we've got matt ryan matt moore matt mcgloin matt mcgloin in math stuff when i say them out loud yeah you're right it is probably it's just sixty one it's like ten to one whatever the falcons odds aren't excellent and then the final game we have the best game of the weekend big joe box head giants packers ask me a one i'm excited will the giants have a hangover from the adderall boosters
you absolutely yes it's still be affecting him you hear the story about eiji delirio from gawker he there was an article about him in esquire today where he got caught up to the booth to hang out with joe buck and troy aikman and he i was doing so much cocaine that he was too afraid to meet troy and they they wrote about this think was in like the new york post or something they said and he so messed up on cocaine that he refused to meet with troy aikman is like i i would turn down a meeting with troy aikman if i even had a mild buzz and yeah like yeah that's a guy that you would want to say hi to sober and then get out of the spin zone treatment so pun strunk from years of concussion that he's always got a mild buzz so maybe it's like speaking the same language yeah good point but
so that the green bay game people going to talk a lot about how cold it is you're gonna get a temperate you're gonna get a thermometer on the field in the thermometer that's actually going to happen yep you might even get the little the some animated snow on the snow on the scoreboard all god fox we're lucky in a lot of flashbacks to previous game one in the cold kaufman's face conference very often space in a lottery are often back to just have him on the sideline right he should be the thermometer is instead of a thermometer was put call from the silent or any swelling right close by how red is his face check in with pam all over on the side and and it's like when you put the litmus paper and do a ph test like you've got color coding next to his face but some of the temperatures okay looks like he has okay it's negative five yeah it's the brightest red ever so we're now below zero his nose is black what does that mean is to add some goblin is that he's got an interview next week with the bills yeah he's gonna breezy brings out was still going to be going back to the job market he's young buck he's gonna really revitalize that organization all right
but we're going to do this we're going to pick all of the playoff games little competition little part of take competition between the three of us here are the steaks are you going to actually do the state system yeah i'm going to the steaks ok this apologize this time you apologize no i'm not going to apologize saying we already agreed as a group that we were not going to wear suits that we would do it just in general i don't need an apology i finished in the middle so just apologizing to kermit the frog and sipping my tea you actually are sipping tea so we're going to pick all of the games competition little friendly competition and here's what the loser has to do the loser us to hold a twenty minute phone conversation with marlins man i like i feel like twenty minutes it's it's a bit long it's all along down his twenty second zero shot you're not twenty catching up yeah i can't really like it's not an interview or anything like that we might periscope our side of it you have to like talk to him like he's the
no your dad or so basically like calling a grandparent with dementia yeah so twenty minutes loser ass suck tomorrow it's meant for twenty minutes on the phone and call him with your phone or she will probably get a lot of text so this is for the entire playoffs right now not just this week so we'll tally score so hank's going to go first 'cause you didn't write anything down so hank go ahead and pick the games like raiders the raiders are plus three one slash two the seahawks seahawks are minus seven and a half the steelers steelers are minus ten and the packers in the packers are minus four and a half so hank is locked in ok all no no he took the raiders good i've got houston seattle miami green bay okay so we're we're not gonna be all the same i have the raiders seattle miami the giants no one on the giants on your car you guys you guys think rogers gonna stay hot or in when the temperature gets
cool yeah he's definitely going to you know what my favorite take is the packers aren't built for lambeau this ain't your grand other specs yeah there there in there playing the wrong stadium this is a new low yeah they almost wish they were somewhere else yeah they would have and you know what people always say wow aaron rodgers you must really like to play in the cold but he doesn't actually like to play in the go no people forget aaron rodgers over with his balls it's like he hates cheating that much that he wants to take it to the we're going to do two things before we the interview we're going to do some embrace debate this one is we'll see where this goes so we're going take this twitter but we're gonna first talk about it here tom brady unveiled a new line of sleep sleepwear from under armour it's close it like reflect your body's
infrared back into your but is that what it is help you heal faster sounds like it's a mike with another think about it which i actually need i'm hot sleeper news so wearing a michael let's embrace the bait wait so he he invented a shirt sure that you wear night yet nature most search your during the day yeah this when you as a job let's do this mike mike i'll be mike okay i'll be might not okay i'll be mike okay right ready i'm yeah all right
so my wife makes me put on a shirt because i have to wax my chest every so often and it gets bristly against her skin back in nineteen eighty five when i played in the nfl for four games i never wore a shirt to bed oh here you go again with your nfl stories i bet you've never worn pajamas to bed either do you well i used to wear a shirt and then i went on nutra fast and i lost about seventy five pounds and i look very weird compared to my playing days but i also like those sausage links 'cause i'm a guy i bet you like the sausage links this segments been brought to you by johnsonville ville sausages home of progressive insurance and subway fresh take hotline's let's kick it on over to the one eight hundred flowers direct line hey and that was it breaks to me i thought you were going to smoke thank you i thought you were going to my to my mind became a little canadian you know
but that is very very good at stuff so fair play right there for you you know it becomes canadian by the way hank you nailed the producer role that usually a producer that just doesn't say anything and then they say something monotone that's what i for fire alright let's to roast real quick remember these are itune reviews that hank is going to read as ross if you leading bleeding from the ears take a few minutes to listen to this overdone load of trash wow okay that was mean okay hey some people might like bleeding from ears yeah you gotta sm ever heard of it yeah back in the 1800s they used to put leeches on your ears bleed out medison that's how you've cured cancer yeah so we're medison thanks were cancer cured cancer with this podcast as soon as i put podcasts on my wife called me and told me she filed for divorce couple hours my daughter got a car accident next morning my dog got hit by a car incidents why risk it don't listen to this podcast bad things will happen to you i promise single
ready to mingle now nobody title now its that's alright i do sit on it yeah i have a car yeah i mean hey yeah now your bachelor in paradise yeah well this year which are also we just put you a rock bottom nowhere to go but up here if you were stuck i buy you know what you get to reinvent yourself very lucky i haven't women with my doctor in the morning because i think this podcast gave me cancer not the oh i answer for a few months and it's going to be fine type cancer like the i'm going to die in a few days and need to write my will and say my goodbyes type of cancer well it let hard season though well if if you were listening to the first roast we are to cure cancers keep listen to the podcast yet turned out we gave it to you but we're gonna also cure you and a couple more weeks i'd rather do my balls and acid then listen to a minute of this hot garbage podcast do us all a favor and give up really nothing really turned a corner with his list since this week so i was like three hundred i really listeners really hate this show yeah i gave this one
star because i'm not allowed to give it zero please fix old okay all right engineering flaw yeah hey nobody likes a nobody likes a know it all yeah file complete with appleton ratings don't go low enough universe gave one started people got all right those are our rose i think you could probably tell those were actually are roast or someone else's rose that's fine we just you know we took some heat off our competition those were pop a podcast rose yes not ours a podcast maybe a new one that just came out a national park nope only in denver and la so alright now kick it to our interview with our good good friend mark titus one of the first recurring guests on the show he is a college basketball savant so we talk a little grayson allen duke will also talk hockey lebron mj good interview one of our favorite interviews
we now welcome on recurring cast friend of the program not in the best of two sixteen but maybe in the best two thousand and seventeen if you're good enough mark titus college back small extraordinaire again in the program i first want to say remember when the come the world series i do remember spring mass in the capital of the world series played fun those are fun especially fun living in ohio when the couple in the world series i've literally literally wanna come fat every single day since we want and people got so fucking mad at me for the longest time but now everyone's over it so and now you are a columbus blue jackets fan die hard right for years right for the last two weeks or three weeks since this one street started this cell it's ridiculous but i honestly started watching hockey right as their win streak started i've not seen this team lose not take credit for it but it's kind of your yeah ok alright so
i know i know it's the capsules year yeah we've been here in the i was about to say tough too bad that the plane the caps and i run the buzz saw because air hockey fan now you we're going to give you thirty seconds to bash basketball oh and b it kinda lazy right hockey together hockey yeah that they go one on one the hockey guys and the guys are tough yeah nba they go they go what they're all about themselves yeah no team defense really him no name defense yeah yeah lebron sit now do you see calgary and and kevin love had the flu or something on it yeah what the hell hockey player ever set up for that home now good players are competition in the in the all star game yeah that's what i will say though as at the end lifetime basketball guide hockey has a they had their first of all they have periods and they have pads basketball what have that sounds like my ex girlfriend
yeah right waiting for that i was just looking at that point there you go alright let's talk about your sport though and something we actually kind of when you were first on the show kind of predicted grayson allen yeah grayson allen the world's greatest villain i love it i this is so that they have a grace and allen and i absolutely love is that all of this is victimless and it doesn't actually matter like there the stakes are nonexistent and the story and and we pretty like they are because we just love to hate do so much but he his foot allen trip and guys and they kind of like trip over and they looked up like what the fuck was that and then they move on and like it's not like he's putting anyone's life in jeopardy it's not like you know anything serious is happening yet everyone's getting so worked up about it and i love it right he's basically pulling pranks like a kindergartner would he's like pudding whoopee cushions down on the opposer yeah yeah little too many type
english boys be boys i said what did you think about the indefinite suspension that only lasted one game pretty pretty bold the coach k huh it stinks to high hell the the k come the k taken believe of absence right as soon as the suspension ends at all is just a little fishy it's all a little much which is siri on it so yeah give us it my theory is that the kay leave of absence is one to but take headlines away from grayson 'cause that's all you want is talking about in case that if i step away and by the way i like both of these things are happening right after they get smoked at virginia tech that's not a coincidence be there so so so this stuff down there now you can play the whole like what we brought him at because i didn't want to leave that decision to jeff cable that's just a really heavy decision and i don't want to do that to my guy so i'm
to make the decision and i'm gonna bring grayson back before i leave and then like it fall it's all like i had no other choice i had to bring him back and i have to leave because my back courage and it's just all it's a little too perfect for maine and and coach k had the nice i'm going to take a leave of absence but i'm gonna do one last home game so i get a standing ovation from the camera crew right home game that was really humble another theory like that k this whole cable thing is a trial for cable because k wants cape to get the job after he leaves so this is this is not act really like his back doesn't hurt he's just saying here cable him to give you the most talented team maybe in college basketball history there's no way you can fuck this up that badly show what you get when's prove everyone that you're a great coach and then that way when i retire you can be like hey remember that time that i took twelve mcdonald's
tends to four no record yeah please don't give me the job please don't write a tell all book about how much i cheated or all the shady stuff that i did for recruits so here's your team i like that notice that nobody is really complementing grayson allen on his hustle in completing his indefinite suspension in just one game
usually takes people way longer than that fissions right off the charts okay man if you even older of young men yeah quicker than both yes in most of the others yeah that's my favorite part about coach k is that winter lose it's only about the kids and teaching them but especially when loose because when tenets and yeah right if if another part of a player on mercer had trips a do pull my guts it's a sort of a lost like he would still be lecturing again about how wrong it was shown to his house yes to his parents to raise your kid wrongly that's why they were i could tell yeah i could tell them that he starts up the right now yeah that's great so with with college basketball kicking in who do you like in march direction is going to be making some noise we need your prediction we need your love
we're huge production guys so yeah i'll go so i think duke is the most talented team but they're they're complete mess and right now the stuff that's going on off the court with you guys so much more exciting to me than what's going on the core and i don't think that's a good thing so but but their team that like i think they're going to figure it because the team i don't know if you remember this people forget the duke beat wisconsin in the twenty fifteen tonight i'll yeah i'm not sure if you remember that video when coach case at the refs down at halftime was like hey guys listen i need this win call the game totally different than the first thing he forgets it every morning sam dekker had a concussion that's true he airballed the first first shot of the game outside he's concussed that national title here though duke was a kind of a mess around this time that year two and then they slowly started piece it together so you know i still i still sort of thinking kentucky is another team that to me it's basically duke and kentucky versus the field and that's kind of a lazy thing to say because they're the two teams
generate the most attention and they have the best players but i don't know there how to good teams i don't trust ucla everyone's really excited that ucla's back but they play no defense low ever and coaches son class coaches on out there yeah you can also that i might cry kentucky off john milnor love that same shoot care yeah calipari sprague helper maybe get some run brecknell far is a little bit too much of a coaches son i don't know man what's the name bryce offered is's name operate is a real coaches is real coaches son he was especially a real car just sound like two years ago they were shit and he was shooting like twenty five times a game what about real quick so you're a cubs fan your blue jackets fan which teams bandwagoner jumping on in the nfl playoffs since no ohio tensor
right i gotta figure out who i gotta wait till the super bowl comes around and your patriots fan of it the patriots yeah the patriots look good to me this year do you love do you have do you have any thoughts on you gave us a couple team you i mean you give us kentuckians to dickie v over here at the shop at the bigger each give us one dark horse team the people can look at i'll give you mine wichita state always gotta lookout for you know fred van delete and ron bay shockers will probably be back sometime around march about what about boise state boise state did you hear we had the coach of boise state on i did hear that i did hear that interview yeah that was awesome and then they won by like twenty against unlv on wednesday night so you guys are spot on by the way that is not that is not a basketball thing like if batman had done that when i was at the house state like everyone the large room discover what the fox goes long happening did dad model ever shit in a towel and hand it to an assistant like rick majerus it but the river chairs that's just like
basketball is not a sport where you just run through a brick wall like if you're doing that you're not playing well it's not a good i'll give you dark horse real quick west virginia jump through january huggy bear hug yeah jumpsuit january so yeah give us give us a team outside the top ten maybe wisconsin thirteen so they can save them it's at the top twelve wisconsin actually is sort of wisconsin planes so well like they saw at the start of the year just to get everyone to stop believing them and now they're just slowly creeping up in the wisconsin there is consulate in the big ten sucks this year so like even if they beat if they're not going to like grab everyone's attention so they're going to get like a three seed in the tournament and yeah i do like wisconsin ok one team i guess my real answer the florida state they are really good they are really really long and athletic in i don't really have anything need to say about them they're actually a good scary team and you can say that's what she said
no singer sewing athletic no those is your mind okay i've got a question that i've always wondered and i've always been too dumb to really think about it until just now attached to somebody new you city a lot of really good basketball players how come all the college teams suck i have no idea this is a thing across the country i mean like philadelphia that's why villanova winning was kind of sort of a big deal with that like philadelphia has a ton of talent too and they yeah they kind of have stocked in la even like you silly he's been terrible forever chicago chicago the same day in chicago is a ton of players no one know illinois team i think has been in march madness for like a few years
and it's like them into policy can do anything they don't play downtown yeah and we can't keep anyone it's weird okay so this can a lot earlier so i'm sure some like socio economic reason for all this but like yeah all the best college teams in every sport seem to be in just the middle of nowhere engine in lexington kentucky and lawrence kansas and you know morgantown west virginia like that so so i'm gonna i'm not smart enough to connect the dots i've got a theory i i can't really connect the dots either but i'm gonna start betting on teams just based on which one has the lowest population density in in their hometown i like that i think that's a good angle i'm trying to think who yeah who's the best gonzaga that might be i can get you can that you maybe yeah definitely that there could be a safe zags at saint mary's i'm looking i'm looking at a top twenty five right now st mary's is i went to a game at saint mary's a couple years ago when they played in that i guess there campus is like so i pull in campus and i know i'm like going off topic here but this is this blew my mind so i'm driving to saint mary's
they have one road that leads into the campus and that's it and you i meant is one road and there's a guy standing outside the gates of the campus taking tickets for parking and i get a ticket and i'm like where do i go from here and he's like just park anywhere you want on campus like what so i just for the a parking spot and i look around the campus is like smaller than my high school was and the gym for like thirty people in the middle of nowhere yeah and i don't know st mary's is the nature team if you're into the smaller into the tiny school classic gambling school those are the gambling conferences where it's like i always end up on a saturday night betting the saint mary's game at like one thousand one hundred and thirty at night right also saint mary's they are chock full of australians like half the roster is australian australia as a country has super low population density there yeah so yeah this is all lined up to my three yeah that's not make sense
what's the mood what what has been the mood in columbus since urban meyer had a second heart attack what what is a game by the way i know like of the college football playoff coming up they got clinton right yeah it's coming up yeah it's coming up yeah right on the corner is a heavy favorite i actually want to say i love you i like ohio state's team total over there is like eight one slash two though definitely gonna score crush that ever central square offensive juggernaut i feel like such an asshole 'cause all my all my family was asking what's going to happen i was like we're not going to get blown out i know that we've probably we could lose i could totally see us losing is clemson's good but i just don't see us getting blown out that can happen and i think we got yeah i think i qualify but i don't know if you did the math on this guys but the big ten the last two the last two playoff games they play then they scored zero and they've given up sixty nine not
if you knew that nice didn't know that yeah that's not alabama them a thirty eight clemson up thirty one symmetrix zero for michigan state and yeah i don't know what that means not so good in head to head yeah nine it's all right i want to ask you one last question because we've had many debates you and i about the nba if i love if lebron beats the warriors will he be the greatest of all time this no don't say he's already don't do that let's not go backwards conceding yeah so my favorite say about this is that i never actually gave a shit and now i know you do i'm not sure how
the story we did the we we were drunk at the indy five hundred and we basically did i did lebron verse michael jordan for like five hours and then hang i'm so drunk i realized russell the big cat was the start of the world i really the big cat was very passion about jordan i thought a little big money i'm gonna i'll guy i'm sure he will run i'm one of the bridal abroad the yeah did you texted me for like three weeks after the whole playoffs really look at this bomb yeah he's a bomb has shown up in the last two games and we can win two games i mean come on i thought it was i was listening you guys talked to was a rappaport the other day and you're you're talking about how people hate lebron and rapper was talking about he bird and then big cat chimes in with like no one hated jordan and i had to pause the podcast i was laughing so hard it's true in all seriousness i think brian is i know
hard to make a serious point on this show no no i want i want you hello brian if you had to clone a guy and and put five of him on the floor yeah and since actually is clearly the guy that you would want if you're making a basketball player in a laboratory from the ground up you build lebron james in the laboratory like germany making sure that somebody is engineered correctly chemically dope translation so on a scale of nine to ten how racist is boston yeah yeah i would say so thank you i chime in if you've always that you're going to give the story yeah i got to give a little bit about sir so lot of lot of stuff in the news about gordon hayward and boston fans booing jae crowder cheering for hayward the money jones got on the air and said that boston fans would absolutely love corneil which which i think they would i mean that i don't
think that's out about yeah they were they love good players that come to the celtics years true yeah you got it it is bordered white i didn't i didn't really error yeah i don't see color butler to utah jazz barely white that's going to be devastating when hayward goes with the celtics and brad stevens released to go coach i you actually that is a perfect way to end this we need to we green team yes in t into this you see that's one of our award winning so anyone who missed wednesday's show we are going start marketing creatine in infused tea for men called crean t it's tom crean's korean tea and it's just as stupid fucking face on the box of the t 'cause you know you'll buy it so some had his number a listener and he texted it and then tom crean said like smooth
idiot like now i'm i'm now i'm sending your number to the my security team and he got really at you you you have like you know this about tom and he's like very sensitive about this stuff right com crane called me a couple years ago maybe was three years ago he called me out of the blue because i had written at things about him and he just completely surprised me you still had a milwaukee area code he had been i use like five years and he had the milwaukee marquette area code and i don't know why i answered but i did and i'm just sitting on my couch in my pajamas and he calls me like hello and he goes is this much and i said yeah he goes did i do something to you i know what you mean i go who is like this is tom cruise did i do something to you
i said no coach like other than the syracuse the buckle and the the twenty thirteen turn of it you ever really done it can be like well what you're writing is this really mean and and rude and i just wondered if i did something else they don't like the most awkward conversation and then i gave my gave his phone number to all my buddies and then the next time you called me he had a new phone number so i like to think i'm responsible for their you taught him a little bit about cyber security right so good job yeah shit by the way i thought about this so i got i got a lot of friends and i got sources and the indiana program i got a lot of you know i grew up in yeah so loud you can't count troll bombs a source but go ahead cheryl show balls but i say that so so my sources don't get in trouble but i heard a story they they pass it through the grapevine a couple years ago or why don't the timeline doesn't matter at one point korean if to get a live bat for alive like animal bat for appropriate had
talk he told the managers go find me a bat and so the managers go try to find a bad kids go by realize yeah you can't buy baton owning a pet bat and indiana the legal they tell him this and it response was we'll do you guys know anybody who has a bass line around their atticus like a bag of blood underneath the box would like to take profits are i'll tell you what tom green failing on that not a football guy leon rice would kill back he would've had a bad by sundown he would have put on a minor set and gone spelunking into a cave with the met and prove that it's so fucking bad it would about that for everyone free back at the taco bell arena in boise oh man that's fantastic so cream t we're going to do it all right mark thank you so much i think i'm going to say it probably going to be
best of in two thousand seventeen but i might as well so yeah i had i had to tell the story yeah well the first time i came on it's kind of funny because yeah i'd let let me get a little sentimental here like the first time i came on a like when your guises for shows true and and you had no idea how you're doing i had no idea what the hell does show was yeah we're always so it's pretty cool to see pardon my take everyone podcast i mean you're a big part of that okay yourself you also implying that we know everything as soon as as soon as you guys in the big east i'll call me to have the whole no that's bullshit and also connecting the dots are you for a whole weekend in chicago your available should call the montero yeah so i just want to talk about me montero quick i was the best mom i guess i rented in docket shantaram you're a big blue jackets fan they're the best team in history the nhl right now your part my taylor and
best podcast in the history of two thousand and seventeen so like don't count yourself out and give yourself a little bit of credit yeah i'm on i'm on i'm on a good run right you are the true balance avatar the cubs you're rooting for alabama now because ohio state didn't make it to the final four point i'm a cab fan kentucky kentucky just to cover both bases you got'em both real quick when tom crean called you did he facetime you by accident he seems like a big facetime by accident i was like talking into the phone but you can see his cheek he he's surprisingly he did not do that but he surprisingly did have me on the phone for like i could i felt like i could have talked him for half an hour like he really wanted to actually talk to me which i found pretty shocking but no i'm his shot like he wouldn't let it go it wasn't like i want to call this kid and tell him off and then hang up it was like so how you been you know i'm like i don't fucking know you go but anyway the best 3d
got from one of our listeners earlier today he said the tom crean looks like the type of guy who say is the word butt head on ironically it's so true he definitely calls people butthead around indiana and he spits when he talks to those from adventure amazing that is an amazing that korean in the hard balls are in the same family so they don't share blood they don't share blood like they found each other that tom crane merida harbaugh there no accident still perfect no life finds a way he say well it's like when a girl from who has dad issues marry somebody just like your dad that's how those families get some right yeah exactly alright mark thank you were going to leave you to your blue jackets big blue jacket fan
i'm going to get it man we're going to have you back on more now because we now want you on the two thousand and seven you gotta put in your reps for two thousand and seventeen that's all i'm trying to i got two goals this year number one is to make it on the best of list part of my take two is to make it on some shitty thirty under thirty list before i turn thirty that's it oh ok happy birthday i guess yeah i don't know our birthday when's your birthday right young buck like june twelve pm pst are barber things like three weeks away so you just trying to cut is your birthday cooking us cockiness you're going to cut in front of us here you want to say happy birthday to us before we get to june hey buddy won't you let us blow out the candles are cake before you buy yours or at ease man i don't even get to work party freimarkt you want to plug your amazon birthday wish list for listening to somebody stuff on by a dildo yeah we we probably these are those jokes that like we don't realize we haven't said i'm out loud we're going to start
then the pornstar wish lists for our birthdays so hit that hit that up amazon wish list alright thanks man appreciate it going to talk tomorrow and that was our good friend mark titus aka drake he's a big fan of kentucky do the roman empire the sun rising in the e everyday wall street walking big big wolf big big big bank guy he's going to get one of those jumpsuits it's like half kentucky have duke yeah i hope so yeah i'm just rooting for a good game out here folks ok let's do some segments we have stuff oh by the way jimbo special guest this weeks and make sure you turn in their great jimbos pat mcafee another good front of our first segment we have man card for the one person we probably never thought we take a man card from yeah nick saban so nick had to go out there and get a massage because he watched
watch film and hurt his neck so take his man card hank hi i'm joe buck hand over your man card but i really man card even though he's working so hard and so it's kind of you have to look at both sides of this because you know that nick saban did not say i need a massage like his wife or somebody else is like nick this is getting out of hand he can't walk we need to get you a massage but on the other hand nick volunteered that he never gives anything up to the press don't the first thing that you give up i just got a massage nick save and probably i'm imagining he doesn't do happy ending he probably skips a happy ending but still pays for it he's like i don't have enough time for this but i still want to pay you like i don't know enough time to come i gotta get outta here and get back to the film when was the last time you think nick saban had an orgasm oh my god it's gotta be years right
it's probably like he's got time for sex like you get you get himself like twenty minutes after the national championship and yes to jerk off in the bathroom stall so when he's getting the trophy and he's not smiling in his head he's like planning his route okay here's where the shower is there's some louis and there he has one of his assistants he has lane kiffin like print out still images from huge is he's like leave it leave it for me behind the bathroom my little territory yeah my little tricks i sell yeah he buys one like manny's packet size thing a vastly in the year and it keeps pocket all year touching it and that's where he's going once i open this i know i can release oh man i don't know how we got there we have a bad visual so this bad visual goes to george mccaskey owner of the bears he had this to say because it's been tough times for the bears he's had this to say though the most trickle part of my job is after ulhas
looking my mother in the eye that stuff so his mom is like the true owner and he's a grown man and he's in his 50s or something and the hardest about his job is disappointing his mother over and over he is buster bluth he's working for the wrong order organization if that's the hardest part of the space because yes we do that a lot right yes yeah just yeah that's a bad visual for fifty or bad bad visuals but like i just can't look my mom in the eyes you know what if he's going to say that they should at least have like a camera up in the owners suite where you can see the look that happens every game it's like a tradition yeah it's negative reinforcement and i want to see it as a fan right i want to see the look and you know what i don't even believe that it's a look in the eye because virginia seems like the type of woman who will i can't i'm sorry i you don't get to look at me when you use yeah i agree with that also kind of i might pull up turn on george mccaskey cuz i can't run
last time i mean you kind of reaching age like maybe one thousand seven hundred and eighteen were like i'm just going to disappoint my mom no matter what don't i mean that that ship has sailed like whatever and less i become a doctor that saves like like a baby heart transplant doctor yeah my mom is probably going to be at least at least mildly disappointed with my life choices right but i think it probably recycles when you get really old like when you get into your 50s or 60s right that's pretty old right right you're still living in your mom's house probably maybe go see like your mom's huge mansion in this case and you like go see a couple of psychiatrists and they're like what you're looking forward your mother's approval and then you get back into it so that it's if they're in the same room after game ever seemed very dominant in a very submissive dog in the same room the dominant all just turns her head away you know it's the only way to get together yeah exactly still won't even look it is installed on all sales only runs and but i really do like the thought of him as buster bluth like i i think that they lose he tell
he tells virginia they lossed and then virginia is like just brush my hair for me do you think they still breast feed yes he might see i'll skip that room so let's keep that going let's get that circulating are going to fire john fox well i gotta finish my meal and that was george mccaskey breastfeed i see great impression we have a locker room talk this is one of my favorite locked room we've ever had because it is so blatant and out front ben boleware in backer or yeah he's a linebacker for clemson there a video that was going around and one of the clubs and players kinda like give the old he guste he goes to the house the player a goose is one quite a put it put his hands in his asshole he gotta couple knuckles in there yeah he goose them benbow had this to say about it we're trying to say sex sexual assault people that say that have either never played football have never been in a locker room
i know there's going to be that one person will i played football on i never did that you either sucked at football you had no friends in the locker room or you were the person that went in the bathroom stall to go change because you were scared to shower with them yeah he goes in that's locker room he also says they do it he's not wrong no he's not right that's the beauty of locker room talk he also says they do it to break up the seriousness of the game yeah so just like but if you want to like make friends with the other guy on the other team like just let him know that you're just having fun just stick your hand in his ass yeah they said that this actually nothing new and they do it they try to be a little more discreet i actually that's like are those little things that i'm sure twitter will flip out about it like you can't do that but if you're if your opponent is like every time they go to the ground they know they're going to get the little like gonna gil fingers up the thank you that wears on you mentally yeah but it sure a
i'm backer research if every time you get tackled uses you that makes you just not want to get tackle that much more it could only to reverse okay either way i like that he threw in there at the end like the the like poor kid who like showered with is being sued on and if you just made he made sure that hey que you listening out there like thirty five year old man is probably well adjusted now has a family member when you were a nerd in high school i believe the are you brought you welcome back you think during the journalists in that room that had a flashback yeah they sort of just pissing up well what happened was i heard the actual audio of it and a lot of them started like cracking up at all
so it would i think it was you know you've heard us usually is on the phone with us so for me to stop in a locker better because locker room talk you know we got a deal hello hey let me what's up it's got some part might take what we stuck our fingers up your ass yes he didn't want to talk today get right to it you won't have much time with money to get right to it still answers i think yes my favorite segment that way yeah it really is super cut together let's talk a little bit about gambling guys i use bet dsi bowl season came and went you still got the national champion
game coming up on monday you're going to want to put some action down on that the nfl playoff taking center stage what better way to partake than using bed yes to lay down a little extra action on top they've got over twenty years in business our top rated on most sports book review sites they've got a great mobile product it's easy to use from anywhere they even have live in game wagering so you make up what you lose if you lose a little bit in the first quarter pull that back in the second half you good to go they've got great customer always available twenty four slash seven three hundred and sixty five they built their reputation on fast payment of winnings and they're going to give you a two hundred percent bonus on your first deposit with promo code take two hundred that's capital t lowercase a e two hundred they're going to
you are free two hundred percent bonus on your first deposit when you use promo code take two hundred capital t a k e two hundred twenty percent means if you deposit five hundred bucks you get a thousand bucks in total bonus credits to the total ones are being fifteen hundred this is for both sports i think it's you know it's an on real deal so go to bet the si use promo code capital t lowercase akp two hundred to get a two hundred percent bonus in any sports or casino betting that you want hey let me this is the guys from part might take in this is locker room talk new segment see any good recently money like showing up
hey let me see guys from part of my take why don't you suck my dick suck it suck the dick yeah little locker room talk any hung up hey why don't you suck our clits hey lenny been diving ok now his locker room talk to lenny dykstra also we've got a great interview lenny come up we actually sit down and talk to her about his book we're gonna be put that i think next week right yeah okay for sure next week look for a home god bless sonny shot let me one of our favorite gas we love him there is a good chance that he might be been bowers dad actually long lost yeah it lines up i guarantee it he spent a few weekends in myrtle beach yeah more than a few i agree ok have a will bond name drop we haven't done this a long time so it's the michael will be name drop of the week he golf with obama once not to brag yeah so this one is actually going out to tony romo
was cousin andy i think it's andy roma i don't know if it's we'll just call mandy roma okay he's got a girlfriend or wife or whatever and it was her birthday so and went out there and got all of tony's friends to make a video they'll record it on their phones since home made a twelve minute long video to play for his girlfriend or wife here's your birthday present which is i'll get into that in a second but on the video it had darren woodson sin press got jason witten ezekiel elliott cousin sal darren johnson miles austin dirk nowitzki sean lee morris claiborne terrell owens and jimmy kimmel and they're like probably does other people are not as best friend jerry jones no i don't think jerry jones okay but it's a twelve minute video of just other famous people saying happy birthday hey happy happy birthday you're my friend tony
he said that his cousin wanted me to do this and so it's just it's pretty awkward and you're not even a football fan problem you're not it yeah you're probably not and he's doing two things wrong in my opinion one he is he's doing like the extremely elaborate birthday present that makes every other boyfriend look bad yep you ever see like a videotape wedding proposal yeah on you too yeah it's like you guys yeah like you've got just an archipelago of you've got like two swans there you've got like a the improv everywhere people are there and so could you breaking broker yeah exact us look bad like just take we're all in this together you know don't do that to a still shows up torn up the score and the other thing is doing wrong here is he's he's really driving home the fact that the only
asset that has in life is that he's tony roma's he's i came in on that yeah here i mean we everybody knew already that this was your thing i'm sure you talk about like forty percent your conversations but like he is really bearing that into the ground it's like here's a present i got for you it's my famous cousin all of his friends member him member that time i told you i was cousins with tony romo every single day yeah so i question will deal on his part if you are wife or girlfriend aren't you a little offended i mean it's the backup quarterback of the dallas cowboys his friends yeah you can do a little bit better than that right maybe last year this means something now i'd rather have jack call everyone does that have any cousins yeah sure he doesn't he'll he'll hook it up yeah i'd rather have docked to it that is quite too that's quite the name drop i bet you will bond has done that i bet you someone in once family done that and that's the happiest will bonds that the most friends it's the most expensive free present that you can give yeah because it's like so
a pain in the like tony romo what a guy because my cousin ashley's got a lot of the time but if if your cousin asked you to like hit up every single famous person you known and ask them for a favor and go yourself away in tom brady would never do it because tom brady smashes cellphone loss those contacts so lastly before we get to gym bos we have a you think yes we do big you think fox news is reporting that the miami yacht party with justin bieber trey songz and the new york giants might have involve drugs oh you're feeling the new don't a miami boat party miami but well i'm kind of the mindset that depending on the city that you that you're in there's a sliding scale for what is considered a drug so i agree with us like if you're in las vegas if you make it out to las vegas live you to do drugs correct
if you're in salt lake city and you have like a sip of beer craft beer and it's much mouthwash and advil then you're basically you're an alcoholic right i agree with that so this is this is almost like draw in the tap water in miami yeah you go on a boat and you have drugs on it others that are on your boat miami well yes yeah no yeah i saw it i've seen tony mcdonough yeah it's like it's like the safety safety inspectors right you have your life to it's do you have your adderall give your coke okay you're good to go alright let's do or jimbo so you got one i got one more thing quick olympic update oh yes so we did these a lot over the summer we told you guys everything that we knew about the olympic swimming pools about the road that were falling apart about the dog shit that was everywhere what are the poop water was a hot topic wanna give you guys quick update on the stadiums rios olympic stadium has reportedly turned into a ghost town that has a smell of mold damage rooms and stray cats nice
so we're looking so actually kind of saving lives is saving a lot of cats lives yeah and it's got a bunch of food that's being removed an like people are taking the seats out and the furniture at the stadium so people are saying when abilities huge stadiums it gives nothing back to the community you basically made a huge salvation army and everything that it's free yeah it's just have to go get it it's a billion dollar litter box yeah that's what they made well it's like in the rainforest when you have the ants crawling around they go to the trees they cut him out they bring him back for their homes that it's going on right here in rio yeah i would love to see the ioc pay michael rapaport like a million dollars cat killer send him down there think about that movie at that green let you give him a couple grenades and yes sir the rambo style machine gun at all just killing cats number were clean up this problem yeah real was overrun with cats to
i showed up get me out of this fucking stadium cock sucker kurtz you feline motherfucking oh man ok let's do some jimbos we actually have a special guest for jimbos pat mcafee colts punter is passing through new york pro bowl punter pro bowl punter thank you yeah let's get it let's get the title right pro bowl punter are you going to purple why it's in orlando suite even better full harry potter world go to chili's go to chili's in the airport escalators ago up the best chili's in town that's right so check it out at the pro bowl there gonna be doing like dodgeball and shit this year and a qb challenge there you go so are you going to the qb challenge or we have a perfect have a perfect quarterback rating now i have i have an incompletion i'm over a hundred though hey there's nothing wrong with a throw away yeah yeah i would fight on the day nine through right now yes right right and so we console someone's bedroom yeah so we're going to do that we're gonna do it this way
hank is going to read one paths can read or go back and forth so it's going to be not only jimbo's but a little bit of a reading competition see thank hank's it's not a great reader that's not true good now doesn't read so good just a bit they like to do it so i heard i heard earlier in the day in the office you've always been fired like ten times so it's almost an honor to be with you right but it's been it's been at least like i'm sure since you've always been fired right yeah they have gone past the almost well do you have a board that set up in the office i says it has been this many days since hank is almost been fired doesn't hold off and we should do that make you survive an apocalypse cockroach cocker roaches what's what you're like a little looks yeah yeah who is hank twink i actually think that's good yeah that's going to stick with doing it like alright let's do it thank you seem jacked up right now i'm ready to go ok please get me fired up nothing like reading punch a window and broke my hand at my mom's wedding oh ok yeah at your mom's wedding huh
i feel like that's ok though 'cause ok your mom is getting married to a step dad presumably your two thousand and sixteen this is healthy like good point it's healthy to express some frustration i think is leading a step that now yeah yeah but if you're if you have a new dad in your life i think you get at least a few moments of going aggro on everyone and that might be at a wedding yeah what maybe step dad knows now hey this kid lunatic well yeah so did we talked about this while ago but when you get married you should everything that you want to do for the rest your life before you get married so like when your mom is gay marriage your step dad you need to be violent then so your step dad knows like hey that's just what i'm mirroring into like it was surprises yeah he's the alpha yeah let everyone know who's the out this was not a mistake right like on the alpha in this room right now everyone knows that i don't know what that means my grandpa is in the hospital mom say group message to our family giving us an update on his health
at the same time one of my brothers send a text in our separate group message talking about the chiefs in the playoffs i then accidentally texted my mom's message saying who gives a fuck survive in advance from here on out wow wow i think it's good price of your grandmother sick right grandpa grandpa yeah it is survive in advance yeah and hopefully your grandfathers chiefs fan yeah 'cause he's both sides or their nice there they need to figure out something steve jobs wherever you if you're listening this in brazil i know you're still alive first second second can you please figure out something for like i messaging where you get like a thirty second taken oh fuck also his grandfathers
sounds like you might be a chiefs fan in which case you're kind of in like a win one for the gipper type situation now with the chiefs so really the pressures on andy reid and alex smith to help this guy's grandfathers survive survive in advance you went in your end yeah exactly he controls his own destiny that's crazy wow lydia reed has no idea the pressure that's armory huge wow i blacked out on christmas eve and in my hottest coworker didn't we're doing it until i want to dm are on new year's eve yeah okay way so he's going back from break god it with a double dm two is how you know what so this i think this comes up every now and then jim both his shoe shop sure sure she knows where he said you're not in the friend zone sure sure sure shot i mean great you don't want to be stuck just being like well what are we well now it's
yeah quite a little bit and worst case you know sooner age gonna quit right if you send her your first dm after like two am on a gino night she knows exactly where this is so you're not gonna be she never answers though yeah yeah surprise not you know well at least at least you know what time move on yeah or you go with the classic i got hacked minute dot dot dot but if i didn't how do you feel about the hacked account right it's a great exponent everyone buys it all the time it's a great excuse you could follow this dm actually up with just lul ooh yeah i mean i'm and i've taught you that message any time you have to send a message that you might not want to you just wrote a read write a ha ha yeah you wrote one hard to me one yeah you just gotta do it just let you know like hey we're just joshing did yeah 90s terms just guys being dudes in this i got drunk at my friend's place and noticed he had a treadmill one of my friends bet me five dollars i couldn't run three miles on it i took
offer an one but wasn't wearing any shoes when i woke up the next day i had blisters on the bottom my feet and all my toes i just here at three miles did right and also why would you try that's the worst bed ever five looks like it has to be like eighteen like the only time were four five dollars like mean something is when you look at college kid with zero dollars that's very i sometimes forget like five dollars or not i was with money when i was like i would just blow money and just not have money and you know my credit cards max and stuff so yeah you i almost actually ate a piece of dog for fifty bucks once ten times more than what this guy was gonna make you were just gonna say you are hungry that stuff for you are no is frozen piece of dog shit i had it almost mouth and i remembered that fifty dollars would get me you through the weekend but i would be dog pooped you like five dollars used to go a lot further back in our day like that you could live for about a week
five dollars college towns five dollars gets you like like two strings for the whole bar to steel reserves yeah you're good to go i want my fancy who's running three fucking miles for five dollars there barefoot no less that is the worst part of all time i'm going comes say you deserve the book and also what is the friend get out of it like you just want one suffer yeah do you sit there for a few more i five minutes so get new friends number one you're making boring bets yeah you need to switch this friend circle up liven it up a little bit stay away from treadmills and also respect yourself a little bit more your value worth more than five dollars a year an award winning basket isn't i don't think no he's an award winning lesser that's at least worth seven dollars one my fancy slowly but was a huge dick all season to have one of my league now the commissioner who's also my roommate who i beat in the finals is paying me my winnings in sixty nine cent daily increments that's all i should have my total winnings in a hundred and today i love that god is great good good yeah that's not even jimbo i mean you did what you had to do being a dick and i'm
sure it was very satisfying to win after talking shit all year and now the commission is doing what he now has an income steady for one hundred and fifty days let's talk about that never gonna be broke it's an annuity right so you could probably call jg wentworth get a lump up front right now it's not gonna be the full total never take the lump yeah but don't take a lump sum yeah that that six nights in today you can roll that over put in a four one k search search earning money for you if i were over fifty fifty at a stadium i'm going to keep it out take the lump sum and just ask if i could just get like hundred dollar tickets every time i go it rolled yeah will reinvest your on comedy central now you'll donate it back yeah i don't we don't we didn't get our peak sweat on that i had a serious spinal surgery back in high school and was bedridden for awhile i started getting better but couldn't leave the hospital so i could take a shit i i was so backed up from all the painkillers was given a ton of laxatives and when i finally felt ready to take one i was helped over to my bathroom
ended up not take making it in time and shit all over the floor my hospital room in front of hot nurses and my hospital roommate who had a brain tumor i'm pretty sure that's how a lot of porn stars right hot nurse helping you take on my oh let me help you clean that up for you know well it's german porn wow that's a lot of shit germans do a lot of pooping you must eat a lot yeah baby oh you're a big boy you're growing bowling you're just been snowed on those reasons oh wow is this you guys talking what's our poop your the well yeah both yeah yes alright just went all the way down my leg no i didn't know what i was doing i'm sorry i'm sorry miss i won't i want to oh shoot i got a boner man that's that's great that's the guy this big logs press and i'm a prostitute you probably i have a you want to check out my balls all cough yeah yeah there's no ernie so i'm pretty sure i'm pretty sure this is a good thing for you probably impressed yeah
right i started national on one side ways i started daily national satellite radio show on monday but forgot to do a second of planning yeah it's a major classic jimbo hear about that all the time and you press people are still making that mistake these the nice thing is you can just say it's part of your charm there just not put any effort into anything do who wrote this we probably should have told pat that there's usually someone will send in a jimbo that you something dave did yeah so i was driving back home from out of town hungover his balls listening to scott van pelt episode parenthesized for the second time because it was so damn good i am because i'm an award winning listenership tap on his battle pattern and had him this person knows how to get the jumbo read this part came on our big cats dogs stella starts ferociously barking my dog bo
much like barack obama's dog was in the back seat and started freaking out i tried to grab him and calm down and took my eyes off the road swerved and pop both of my tires in the right side of my car from drifting off the road a cop pulled over to help me and smell the alcohol my breath my mom at i have two hours pick me up my car still inside the road bows okay all i heard was this guy didn't get to do what i'm going to just go out on a limb and say this is a white guy yeah well so you think you do you i but he's blaming my dog yeah for breaking down his car and resin obama and has gotten poll while so many names right maybe take a look in the mirror lot of finger pointing finger board here you got it you got you got poor stella who didn't do anything but just bark all the time whenever we have microphones around you obama's dog i don't know why he's involved maybe neuter your dog it sounds to me like a dog in the backseat kettle corn
he has a hot ella yeah as the car is still the hot i was gonna ask for if you've ever heard her bark she's yeah she's a little rambunctious just thursday she is there's either even though she is she's she's she trap queen is getting to do while yeah the cops said what you your parents and they can drive you so the cop heard the story he explain them some obviously and the oscar yeah you're right yeah the card was still barking we did i use trap queen right there comment on the truck yeah salient i'm i'm my dog is a trap quip queen yeah she gets she gets all the other dogs like being like damn i need that urge like not crash car please he was a monstrosity so much love side to bring my girlfriend on my four day annual new year's ski trip of fifteen of my best friends in college she fell hundred feet on the first run day one her attorney had to be strapped
glad to get down and i had to take care of her all weekend never take your girlfriend on a college would you say that was a ski trip okay so heard a funny story the other day in doing what you just said is a much better results than what happen to donald trump when you first met i forget which i think was marla are could be you eat it could've been long i'm not anyway she takes her on a ski trip they get to the top of the hill she start skiing and she does like backflips going down and he thought that he was going to like take this girl out in like teach you how to ski she was better than him he immediately picked his skis up and walked inside for the rest of the week and he's like power movies like this sucks i can't do it so i would rather that your date gets devastatingly injured then shows better yeah okay so may exist this happens i feel like on everest like big ski trip you do with your friend someone's gonna get hurt yeah socks definitely a bummer usually ends up in some prescription
this whole on being able to go on a lot of ski trips a difference i've wow that many people relatable yeah wow tank and was just someone like to ski yeah i've never been skiing the time in iraq it's one of those bougie sports it's pretty yuppies yeah i don't use polls i'ma freestyler cool boarders websystems know tackling in skiing so about i got married on new year's eve and end up getting super hammered that festivities were over the bride and i took things back to our suite to consummate the marriage congrats on the exercise as she was in the bathroom freshening up i puked all for the better myself my new way at a car maid of honor and some of the groomsmen to help clean everything up i woke up the next morning hungover on a mattress smell like vomit needless to say it didn't have sex people really have sex on their wedding night it's it's the wildest i think kevin was like it's the craziest thing ever so i i just know that you just made a memory in a memory is important yeah i feel like
when i get married once you get married you gotta wait a few days to get really into the sex but memories are the important part good or bad at least pick a timestamp you'll get you'll be ninety years old hopefully sitting next to your wife still and you like member that time i he be shedding all that stuff it'll be shitting all over himself the pork bone the nurse porn boom now we're back to the hot nurse having sex with the old man that's it those are the so that was a good gym bos yes yeah i like it all right pat hopefully will see a super week yeah i think i'm i hope you come down yeah yeah that was actually how we last year was the first time we met you yet awesome somebody wasn't there a mention i was there i wasn't i was padded padded golf ball that you weren't working for barsha yeah well it wasn't part of the cool kids club power had been golfing all day and your face was so red burn i'm always read but even even more so your red skin wow you're a w word wow white the jimbos
that was our show we have a big week set up next week do i want to announce mondays guests i guess now i'm not going to but he's big he's big and it's going to be big for bold and he's bald anne is going to be big not physically big he's actually kind of he's getting a little wired yeah he's felt but i feel like in a scrap he could do some damage he's been through some crafty yeah we may sure that you subscribe on itunes follow us at pardon my take on instagram and twitter app are still sports our main account and get into jumpsuit january it's been quick update i mean it's been
basically life changing i'm getting looks everywhere ago and it's all wow that guy looks really comfortable looks the best part of my morning is waking up and realizing i'm just putting on a jumpsuit yeah the best i don't want to gloat but the best part of my morning is walking out of the train an looking around and everyone's like damn that guys comfortable maybe a russian mobster yeah every day is good dick day when you're in room safe day great a lot of great picked a strong together and got a winning streak going on all right that's our show we'll see on monday and we're gonna we're do boomer we'll have been yeah he'll be back so we'll have boomer all playoffs and will see you monday
it's pardon my take
Transcript generated on 2019-10-14.