Dr. Phil revisits steps you can take to dramatically change your life. From claiming and accepting praise to knowing your real currency, learn how to “stretch” and behave your way to success – even if it feels like you have to “fake it until you make it.”
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
I want to take a pause here to give you a quick preview of what's airing today on doctor phil, take a listen twenty five year old officer gifts and what a federal jury found, both Terrence, richardson and ron claiborne not guilty of Alan gibson's murder. Yet they're spending life in prison, Allen's daughter, believes the right. Two men are behind bars the thought of each parent's inference family for the first time. These people lie to you had nothing to do with the death. Defying doctor Phil check your local listings and for more on today's tv episode log on to dr phil dot com now back to fill in the blanks
you'd get that you need to take care of you, so
You can take care of other people. I want you to take care of you. So
you can be a gift to your family. I want you to,
we one of those people that stumbles around in life
I want you to be one of the people that says there is a consequence to every behaviour. So when I choose their behavior, I realize I choose the consequence. If you think your damaged in some way.
you're gonna generate results that second class people should have. If you look,
people that are really successful in business or really happy in her marriage and family, and you say secretly well that's for them. That's not, for me.
really deserve that. Then you
Regenerate that, if you have a damage, personal truth, you will generate a lifestyle. The standard of living men
emotionally physically, financially socially, that goes along with being damaged. Probably gonna think that
Maybe I'm a pessimist, or maybe I'm a little paranoid.
The truth of the matter? Is I'm not,
I am actually an incurable optimist, but I'm an off
most, because I think we can prepare for anything
and we always here that life is a game ban.
I agree with that life.
A game and you may
They go boy, it's not you get a terminal disease or something that is not a game. Yet it is. You have
to be a player? It
the game it does. A games aren't always funny either not always frivolous they're, not always for trivial stakes.
Sometimes a game, has
I that our life or death, but there still a game,
in the game alive. I just
the belief that you either gonna be a player or you
going to be played
My problem is: if you're like me,
and you were raised by the kind of parents that I was raised by and came up through the educational system that I came up through you,
were taught how the world should work
How the world does work now think about the different
you were taught how the world should were if you work hard, you're gonna get your just rewards and that, on
playground, you always heard cheaters, never win and winners. Never cheat! Well,
me tell you. That is exactly where the
Belongs is on a playground with children because of you,
think cheaters never win way
cheese
there's do when
and winners do cheat blanche, Armstrong.
May come on wake up
That is just simply a myth
I was taught how the world was supposed to work, how the world should work, and then I go
out there in the real world and found out how it did work and it was a whole lot different than what I was taught in here.
The truth of the matter, your wife, just
like my life, is full of bad people,
add people is also a lot of good people in it. Don't get me wrong, but it's full of bad people and most of us at all,
guilty of this for a period of time more
Stop us are stagnant. We're unwilling to take the initial
They d get bad people out of our lives. We let dazed and in the weeks weeks, turn in a month's months turn into years and
we just let those bad people stay in our life. They have bad cop,
where they dont wishes. Well, they don't want is to succeed there jealous if we do, they drag
down sucketh dry. They try to take what hours in use
for their own benefit,
they lie. Cheat steal, talk behind our backs gossip about a sabotage. Is there to face
They betray us, we all have those kind.
people in our lives because they hide in plain sight there just everywhere, you ve got him in every
category of your life, and I'm gonna be asking you about that. I'm going to ask you to categorize your life work home, family recreation church. Wherever
and just see if you can identify where these people are
What I want to do today is, I want to talk to you about how to spot him and how to feed him.
And knowledge is power, and I intend to give you plenty of both today.
plenty of knowledge and plenty of power, and that
Equipped you live in the world as it is not is how it should be. So here's the deal if
you think this world is all her,
he dory. Let me tell you it's not
its estimated right now that we have over five thousand active cults operating in america, for example,
is estimated by the federal trade commission that, oh
half of the phone calls you receive in your wife.
This year, our goal
to be scams.
I think about what I just said, one out of every to phone calls you get are going to be
based on somebody trying to take what is yours there,
calling you to rob, you they're calling you to trick, you scam, you
each you out of your money. There are
this is a multi billion dollar industry and its prey
Upon the unsuspected, the uninformed, praise upon the immigrant communities because their new to america- and they
No, the system they dont know the laws, but it's
is the immigrant it praise upon those that are unsuspected
then their uninformed.
I can tell you one of the things that I have done with that
boys at robin, and I have raised J and Jordan
is I started out ribera beginning invested boys
One thing I want to teach you is to always be situation, aware,
situational aware.
Walk into a restaurant
why I didn't raise my boys to be parent
wait to see the world as a scary place that they should shy away from both,
Boys are very out going to bury engaging
they have confidence because
They have awareness because,
go in wide eyed open at
can go wrong, but I always talking about situational, whereas even if they just go into a restaurant,
I always thought misseurs, you walk in the door.
Gay in the room.
And find the most unstable person the most,
Dangerous person in the room,
keep an eye on them. Look for
exits inner room look for
What can go wrong in the situation and then go
What about you go on about your business? Enjoy your dinner enjoy your evening, whatever you're doing but be
Situation really aware
what are you trying to raise a couple of james bonds here? What yes order?
because I want them to be aware of what's going on here about you. Do you
up in the morning and this kind of stumble around
or are you situation aware? I love life, but not everything in it. I love:
Paul, but not all of them.
till I love myself, but not everything about me nothing
is all one way or another, and there
his power in having a crystal clear view of reality.
So yes, I do want you to be situationally aware. I do want you to pay attention now,
you the example of the situation. The aware, when you come into a room, that's environmentally! Are you
situational aware about the people in your life.
do you know?
Who, in your life, is not a fan
do you know who, in your life
Is your enemy.
Do you know who, in your life is trying to exploit you stab in the back hurts
you in some way and trust me
when you know that you can be prepared- and you are
whole lot less apt to become a victim.
now, let me tell you the number one tool of
muggers, for example, and I've interviewed a lotta muggers
What their number one tool is surprise
tell me that they are walk up to somebody on the street at night and
first thing they say is something like
time. Do you have an
because we're unsuspecting and because
we're polite and because we're courteous. What's the first thing you do when somebody says
time to have the first
you do. Is you lift up your left wrist and you look down?
Ok, so now you ve taken your eyes off the person in front of you. Put your
down and put you
hand in hand
the opposition- that's hard to defend yourself,
and in that second, they strike in them.
girl. Tell me two things number one they ve now
capacity to the person, because they ve got them to take their eye off the ball.
and they say then they ve got about a five second window when the person is in denial.
They say therein denial about what's happening. Oh my god.
I'm getting mugged here. Somebody just hit me in the head. Somebody just not me up beside the head, and it
makes them that long to realise? Oh,
I god I'm being mugged and in
that time their are able
to get the advantage. They rely on our denial, our unwillingness to accept
that something bad can and is happening to them.
That's what I'm trying to say to you right now to night
lead happened to you. I'm
talking about crystal clarity, when
your viewing reality and situational awareness about the people around you and your environment? I want
you d, be street smart! Think about
people in your life
want to give you a name for them. They are called bakers,
matters be a. I t, r bade her.
be stands for back stabber ace
transfer abuser,
stands for impostor t stands,
take her age.
stands for exploiter, an all
stands for reckless bade,
That's a new word, that's a new term. I want you to put in your vocabulary, because I want you to find the bakers in your life and let me tell you how I came up with this.
Go in psychology is to differentiate one pathology from another
So we want to differentiate depression
from anxiety. We want to differentiate.
an anti social personality from a borderline personality? We want to differentiate those. You know why.
Because insurance companies require us to differentiate them, so we have a code. We can write down so weaken bill.
Because you got it right down a code and then you send it in and they pay you money for that. So we gotta put people in pigeon holes, but the
truth is, those are false,
boundary lines, member to
perception of uniqueness. I'd
fi your strength and know what they are, so you can play to them and they
leads to number two in your playbook,
you must create a perception of uniqueness. Now. What do I mean by that? I mean you do not want to be a face in the crowd. You don't wanna be a robot. You do not want to be an interchangeable person in a relationship at your job
anywhere if you're, just a random person that yes person,
person could be here again. Another person can be here, I didn't make.
Much difference there, a lot of jobs or like that. You know jobs that will anybody can do
This doesn't really matter who does it
wrong with that, but that's not
For you, if you want to improve your life, you have to create a perception of uniqueness and upset
perception of uniqueness, because it doesn't do any good to be unique. If people
perceive that your unique you ve got
make sure they recognize your uniqueness. You may have some unique scale, but if nobody knows it, but you what good is it?
so you have to decide unique. What is it about you,
you dont, want just be in the middle of the herd. You dont want to blend into the background. If you
to be a winner, you need to find embrace and project those things
that said, you, apart from the herd, set you apart from everything and everyone else uniqueness
Is valuable in so many different respects, and I am one of those people that believes in a fine product
lined product. You kid!
the all things to all people, I think you have to be a defined product. People need to know what they get when they get you. I have some,
to this philosophy, my entire life, including right now, when I say to you right now, doktor phil. What comes to mind just sake about that? What calls to mind
the image your listing this, I hope it's something positive or maybe you'd is to day and because you love to hate me, that's ok
because I don't have a need to be loved by strangers, but when you think of doktor phil I'll bet, you dont confused me with anybody else. Now there are other psychologist out there other shrinks out their other mental health professionals, but I'll bet
dont. Confused me with any of them
and there are our guarantee you. There are psychologist shit America that have forgotten more psychology that I'll ever know, but they forgot.
about learning how to communicate it.
I've got some of them on my advisory board because
I'll call them up it will be.
something really complex or whatever, and I think ok. I want to make sure that I've got this right. I want to make sure I've got the cutting edge information.
some of these men and women are the editors of the peer review. Journals
I know they ve got access to research that won't be published.
For another eighteen months, so
they'll, give cutting edge information. I give a head of cutting edge information.
Research has shown that you can get
doktor feel that you won't see in the journals for another year and a half so
I'm talking about o c. Believe me, I've got up to them.
in information, because I talk to people that no more about it than I do, there are some people,
spend their entire career. On
that one disorder. I don't
but I know who does
Why bring these experts in now? What I say: you're, not gonna, confused me with anybody else. There are people out there like
John grey,
John grey, wrote manner from mars, and women are from venus or whatever the title of it was
I know John, very,
sky lot of wisdom, but you
not gonna confuse the two of us, because he
going to pat your hand and tell you it's gonna, be ok and why and how
Very effective at what he does, but we're very different, very different.
you're, not gonna. Confused me with him
Or him with me,
I believe in a defined product and look you may say
my defied product is I'm a barbarian. You may say
I'm the second coming of common sense in europe
probably both a little bit right but
No confused me! That's what I want you to decide. What is it about you? That's unique!
it is about you that set you apart from the rest.
If you want to win you're gonna
have to be aggressive them.
show inherit. The earth
but is the old joke goes? Will step?
the climate,
it may inherit it, but none among them will step up to claim it.
I want you to step up and claim it and that's
before long
to claim and accept praise and acknowledged integration way, but do accepted now think about that.
Every strategy you embrace every act,
plan you execute
should be designed to distinguish you in a positive way
I mean you wanna get noticed you want to get ahead.
I said you want to come up with an image that
extinguishes, you through you through your uniqueness and you wanna, play big. That means you wanna make waves, you wanna make noise, you want people to notice you.
When they do you're going
get praised
Maybe it's in your career, maybe it's in your family! Maybe it's in your social circles, romantic relationships!
whatever it is, but p
are going to step up and praise you. Why
Is it that most people
the problem, accepting compliments.
Why is it that when somebody gets praise, somebody gets acknowledged?
somebody gets the just rewards of everything they ve worked to achieve the typical
sponsors all shucks, weren't, nothin and dig their toe in the carpet, like all you know now, don't mention it though mention it.
What the hell you mean, don't mention it. I've been working.
six months to get noticed here. Yes,
do mention it.
Mention it to everybody. You know tell everybody, you know what I did you don't
want to be one of those people that shies away from
you have earned. If you have earned the right to be praised, if you have earned the right to be acknowledged, then you
aid to graciously accept that
and for some reason we have
been taught
humility, we shouldn't be embracing, praise and acknowledgement, and
I told you this isn't for the squeamish, because
I'm telling you you absolutely. Should
humility, is great in
in times in certain circumstances,
when you are on the move in your life in your career, in
ever ready is your pursuing and you are
weekly mobile
Why? Wouldn't you graciously accept the
problem it or the invitation to move to the next level than I can
we think of two reasons. One you ve been taught its pride fallen. Narcissistic to seek attention
so you shine it when it comes or two
you really don't believe you deserve it
it is really don't think that you ve earned it. You don't believe
We ve deserved. Willoughby, remove
at first obstacle right now. It is not pride for its
egotist egotistical to
except claim or,
expect praise.
Say expect because you teach people how to treat you.
and when you do a job well, then you
to teach people that you expect to be acknowledged for it and it
you don't do a job. Well, then, you should expect people to say hey that was not up to par. You need to step up your game
you don't want to be lied to. If you want to succeed in this world, you need honest feedback right. You need people to tell you the truth.
Or you're gonna continue,
trend toward mediocrity or worse. You
need to choose to respond differently when someone praise issue or confirms you're value so about
simply learning and practising to say somebody praises you. They come up and say: hey
I tell you you did I really good job on this project and you may
Think it's gracious to say own whole. Listen that lives nuthin
about instead saying
Thank you for saying that you are
really kind to notice. Is that pride full? Is
egotistical is that narcissistic
obnoxious
is it obnoxious for you to say
thank you for saying that you're very kind to notice or
that means so much coming from you so far.
Q for noticing, and thank you for taking the time to say so
that same obnoxious, everyone,
first pillar romantic situation. You can reciprocate at the level of comment that you receive. It
always save to begin with a straightforward. Thank you for your kind words
add any specific reaction that you want to this
second obstacle. If you don't believe that you deserve the credit or praise
let me assure you, others will soon began to agree with you.
Because anybody that's truly evaluating a person's worth value, skills and abilities.
In their heart of hearts, they're going to say they
themselves. Better, now do so.
who am I to second guess them, they ve known themselves into day. They were born.
And they seem to know that there are not very smart.
There are not very good they're gonna lazy and they don't really have ownership in the good outcome so
who am I to second guess them? There
to defer to you. Eventually they may not say to phase, but
can promise you there eventually going to say it to themselves if you lack self confidence if you'd whack self worth
like said you teach me my treat, you presume beggar
to agree with you
I hear you doc, but where
the line I mean does that make you self promoter yeah? Probably so?
If even you won't
boat yourself. Why would anybody else? I do too
to feel every day
five days a week,
If you do a year people,
ask me is this:
fourth watching.
What do you think I say? Oh, no, no, it's just
do. I don't know
that's what I say absolutely not. I say
I absolutely believers worth watching. We really
work to de stigmatize mental illness in america? We give
for common sense, information delivered to their homes every day for free and, I think,
fact that it is the highest and best use of television. Is that
of promoting. I hope so
because I intend to promote what I do, because I believe in what I do
and if somebody sees me on the street and they come up and say, doctor Phil, I just love your show. I love your message. I say thank you
thank you for saying that, because we take it real seriously, this great
I hear from you that you take him out your data. Was, it means a lot.
Why would you not do the same thing in your own life?
asking you to do that because, as one of the things winners do number five you
us become essential. Now this
those with being unique that mean.
There's something about you that,
distinguishes you from everyone else, and you want to be noticed right,
But what I am talking about now is in
whatever situation you're in you,
gonna be perceived as essential and I'll give you a piece,
a good example of what I'm talking about. I have
had the same personal assistant for
forty plus years now and her name is barbara,
let me tell you how essential she is
She knows everything about my life. If
to pass code to get into the nest thermostat at my house, I call Barbara. She knows what it is,
I need the past codes to the screaming services on my phone. I dont know what they are. But barbara knows if the printer,
the copier gets jammed at the office.
Maybe a lot of places, call the company and say this isn't working all I've.
To do is, say Barbara
She comes in and she knows exactly what to do. She can unpack it deconstruct it put it back together.
In the time, somebody else would take to call a repair man
she knows where every contract is where every file is, how to fix every office machine
she knows what every phone number goes to. She knows who to put through who not to put through she,
It is essential. It's like
You would feel if you lost your phone. If Barbara took a week
and just went totally off the right are, I guess they just have to put me in a medically induce coma.
she knows everything she is essential.
if somebody said well, you're gonna,
to cut back here, you're gonna have to
get rid of some employs. She,
would be last on the list
because she is essential in so many different areas,
She is a jack of all trade and a master of most. She is
central
supposed somebody that maybe
specialist somebody. They do this job. They do that job
She has made herself essential due p
four perceive you as being an essential member,
of your socio. Graham
an essential member of your work group, an essential member of
whatever it is, that you are involved in and if you want to be a winner, if you
to be an important.
member of the team you need-
to create the perception of being essential.
I say perception because it's not just enough to be essential. You have
make sure that people perceive you as being set
that's what I mean about accepting praise if somebody comes into as well
sure glad you're here cause. You know how to do well. Everything
You don't wanna say well, no, I mean airbus. God knows how do all this stuff.
You kidding me so well
thank you for notice and I've been here a long time and have made it my job to learn. I guess every job here so
Thank you for noticing you want.
Confirm. Yes, I am
agile, damn right,
common sense. Tells you
that if they don't miss you and you're gone chances. Are
pretty good you're gonna be just that gone
I don't want you to just hope this doesn't happen to you. I want you to find actions. You can take towards becoming essential, irreplaceable.
In whatever scenario urine and
while we're talking about common sense.
You want a guard and protect what you know do
Give way the recipe to the secret sars
remember there is no reality, only perception so to maintain this perception,
you want a guard, you unique knowledge.
if you know how to do.
Things that only you know how to do. You really
Don't wanna go teach three other people how to do those five things they may
and will then come on dutch
I'm a team player. I want everybody to be able to do everything I can do well. Ok
Knock yourself out
But if you want to be essential, if you want to be a player, if you want to be a winner, you are
going to maintain some unique scalesome, unique ability, some unique knowledge that nobody knows, but you
I am asking you to think about that. Does that make sense
don't give away everything that makes you essential everything that makes you unique.
So bottom line. What I'm telling you here is the secret to success is to know things. No one else knows
And guard those things you know
no one else knows mean just be smart about it
when you get into the game alive folks,
This is just not checkers and views.
think that other people,
playing this game with
T jake objectives in mind, then
you're going to miss the level
at which life is happening,
don't be one of those it doesn't get it. This is
Yes, not checkers number.
Six! You play book.
the issue must know you're real currency. I just
really don't like cycle babel
I don't like words that have been so over use that they lose their meaning it really
bugs me when I hear people talking about, I want to empower people I what you'll come on. I mean it.
Power has been used so much that its lost its meaning. What do you even mean when you say that?
about number six. You must
No
your,
real currency,
do you really value
obvious form. A currency is monetary money. That's currency, currency is money
but there are other forms of currency right like getting pray
we just talked about accepting praise a lot of people
value, getting praise and acknowledgement
used to say about general pattern in the war,
You give him a couple of headlines he's good for another hundred miles. The press.
do whatever the odds are dead,
loved headlines be like that.
was a value to him, so
people love social currency,
They love friends. I love to feel like they have a sense of belonging to a group. We are,
I'll feel better. If we think we're part of
Something we belong, something they were accepted by others, if
You have spent time in prayer in meditation. In reading,
the bible, the koran or whatever it is that is.
Your connection and
you feel a sense, a piece about that. You feel closer walk with your house.
Your power, which are used to call god, then you have spiritual currency. You feel
You have a connection
So there are lots of different forms of currency.
Sometimes, when I go home at the end of the day, and I feel like we were
with some people today that I made some real headway with an
were teaching tools and so based on what we covered.
guessing that millions of people got a message today. That was very important.
and so I go home and I'll, be really tired, but it's what I call a good tired, I feel
Like I used my life, I used my platform today in a really,
steve impact for way. That's current,
see. For me. I feel
like I've, made a difference today,
Oh that's a currency for me and you
ask yourself what
is your currency. What is it
real currency
what somebody else's should be.
Your currency, because the worst thing in the world you can do is waste time. The key
is to not waste time or effort, even on a short term. Go if that goal.
cannot yield? What you really want in need?
is just simply inefficient. I've known,
people that
have pursued a specific career they ve got
On the school
in a degree worked in.
at field, gotten,
The top of their field and been
terribly unfulfilled because
Was never what they wanted to do to begin with it? Was
the currency that they wanted.
Worked with a woman one time in life, skills seminar that heads
bit her entire life,
up to the age of forty five working,
an attorney and
It was good at. She was a good attorney, but
passion.
What she really wanted to do,
was dance on broadway
that was her. Dream is little girl. It was her dream and junior. I high school college, you wanna dance on Broadway.
I said why did you not? She said well, I've got in the way
that was an attorney
my grandfather was an attorney
My mother was apparent legal.
our family were lawyers. This is what we did. I was excited
to be allow you, when I get through with school, of the expected to go, join my father's law firm and I
I did what I was expected to do.
And everything I do. I try to do well, so I was good it doing it.
and now I'm forty five years old, have you ever seen a forty five year old answer on Broadway
well, I don't know I've never check their ideas, would probably you're right. I don't know it seems to me probably a young person's thing
Well, so I guess I'm screwed as well, maybe not
and so we worked on that and said, okay, what is
Did you love about this case?
after dancing on Broadway. I just love the creative parts of it, the expressive parts of it.
Choreography the costumes that just everything about it,
what I wanted. All my life.
Well. Have you ever thought about
teaching dance in your community theatre.
No,
Well, let's think about that and
jump ahead in the story, two years
a very skilled answer. She volunteered
community arts programme
became head choreographer, and the first thing that she worked on was the nutcracker for the christmas program and
when I saw her two years later,
and she had twenty or twenty five young girls
She was working into this wonderful programme as they were putting on
you couldn't even get her feet on the ground she was so fulfilled by finding a way to,
that real currency.
And most of these girls were firm.
underprivileged tomes and
her career as an attorney, alas,
I heard a by every one of them, the shoes they needed to dance, the tides they needed a dance leotard, senator that's. She found a way to tat.
What she had spent her life, doing, that she wasn't passionate about
and use it to fuel what she was passionate about
Ask her
This is a substitute. I know this isn't dancing on broadway, but does it
close
she said the first I myself on the side of the stage and why
Those twenty two little girls run out onto that stage and do
what they did
It was my opening night so,
He found a way to go,
her currency to get her dream. Even at forty five years of age,
How about you, you have
to decide
that you will not take no for an answer does
tell yourself no dont, let some
what else tell you no and don't decide there is only one way to get the currency you want.
Decide that you ve blown it that it
too late, because it is never too late.
I said they were sixteen things into play book number fourteen, you ma
deal only with the truth you
Us deal only with the truth
denial.
Trivializing things
minimizing things less for suckers
you have to deal with the truth.
I don't care what
It is
at your dealing with whether its
Irritating your kids.
Dealing with the crisis in your marriage dealing
the crisis in your health. You have to
deal with the truth,
Winners deal with the truth.
and you know when they deal with it. They deal with it at the first opportunity. They have. They do
with the truth as soon as it presents itself now, that's
m self evident right.
telling you that if you want to be a winner, wonder your items and playbook as you deal with the truth, you don't lie to yourself, but that's not
As intuitively obvious as it may seem, because we tend through
something called perceptual defence.
To screen out things, we don't want to see, we don't want to hear and give.
Our brain access.
two, only those things that don't upsetters
and you have to consciously overcome that now-
We talk about what I mean by that,
Is it boils down to this.
when you think about it, don't you know the truth when you hear it.
Let's say you.
Are really worrying about something.
You're really worrying about the test.
From a doctor, you're really worrying about
Your kids out on an icy road or something in it.
you're really worrying about it.
And your friends are there and
I can't even buy a pat on the back and said: oh, it's going to be fine, always going to be okay. Now everything will be fine,
Is it really make you feel better.
Because it doesn't me it's never
Made me feel better
makes me feel better.
Is somebody that comes by and says: ok.
Let's think this through.
Let's assume.
that it is not good news. What's
Next step, if it comes back positive, what
that mean what do you do? Monsters live in the darkness, turned the lights on and see what we have to deal with here. I have saved.
The item for last
if you miss manage it
have the most devastating effect on your life. You may
pick your battles and never
let your opponent have control you ma
pick your battles
And never let european
And have control now.
Let me talk about what I mean by pick your battles.
don't ever get in a fight.
That you don't need to fight.
there are a lot of people. Is that just
They just can't pass up a good fight argument.
They just don't realize your recognise. They don't have to react just because they can.
there might be something going on at school with the teachers of the p.
There are five hundred students in the school, which means they are probably seven hundred and fifty parents.
you don't have to be the one that fights at battle, don't ever by the battle that you don't have to fight.
Now you can think ok adopt phil,
what you're saying is be a passive bystander. What if everybody takes this attitude, well
if you look around and nobody is stepping up.
Then that's a battle. You need to fight. You know
need to be the one that charges every machine gun nest first, every time.
You don't need to be the one? It puts yourself at risk every single time d?
Fight battled, you don't need to fight
Your fair share contribute
support, but you will need to be
The first one through the door ever
a single time there
gotta, be a conflict. Don't ever find a battle.
That? You don't know you can win now
a surprise. Lay in wait a minute
What do you say it here.
I'm saying if you can't win the battle, don't fight it.
Why fight a battle that you cannot win again,
I'm not telling you how the world should work. I'm telling you how the world does work,
Why fight a battle you can't win? If you know that
you can't win this debate this,
argument with your boss, the
why do it
go where it another way find another approach? Co opt him or her into your way of thinking, but don't choose
engage in a battle that you cannot win
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Transcript generated on 2023-05-25.