Robin McGraw is a philanthropist, entrepreneur, and best-selling author. She also just happens to be married to Dr. Phil! “I fell in love with you that very first night,” Robin tells her husband, whom she fondly refers to as “Phillip” on this week’s “Phil in the Blanks” podcast. The couple, who celebrates 43 years of married life on August 14, talk about their family, key moments in their life together, Robin’s considerable accomplishments as a businesswoman and advocate, and life in the public eye. For more information: https://www.drphilintheblanks.com/ See omnystudio.com/policies/listener for privacy information.
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
We should do it over. So I could really have an expensive dress, but would you go further drew's? Ninety
dollars. Ninety nine!
a free waiting there and I had to put it in layaway. What was it I was doing that made you say: that's the one. You are trying your best to prove to me. You did not need me or anyone else
fine all by yourself. Oh, is that we're gonna take a broader ever got outrage at Barbara. I always thought that you can change the world cut. I'm glad we recently
okay. Well, this is probably my number one favorite fill in the blanks. I don't know if it will be the easiest or the hardest. I've ever done, but my guess is someone. I've met before I always say if I've met my guess before, and I've met this guest before
she's, my wife Robin, so why am I choosing to do her now? Do her that didn't? Does it
Why am I read your book choosing to interview her now is because
Tomorrow is our forty three
heard wedding Anna Maria. I thought this would be a good time. Is I've been meaning to have you thought Tuesday when a drop? These falls the day before forty third anniversary? What you think about that? Can I say first, I'm shocked I really in south rail to be here and for such a beautiful, beautiful recent, but I have to say that so many people ask me
Are you ever going to be a guest? Will you ever be against it? I say no, no one ever gonna be
asked- and here I am. Why do you think you and me a guest,
a large army, not at the edit button to ride out well
May I say how do we only has brilliant people who have something to offer a really. I've said that, but I don't know I just thought
oh, not me, and who does what we're going say even for together with my eggs,
example around throughout. No one else could do this right here today to celebrate something like this with you, so I am thrilled to be here and very excited.
Restore you have three dear friend my peasant computers, to win their backs to me. You don't know anything this autumn and I have no idea. Above anything, that's gonna happen today. This is a surprise for me. He only ask me two days ago to do that.
Well. You said I only have brilliant people on here and what a mess I want, a break. You you ve, been to every show right, even every ass doktor fill and before we came out here.
Two Ella, you never went to work with me. You didn't go the court room with me. You didn't go the office with me, I'd leave and see when I got home
which work for US rice. Yes, you re land over the time and that's what you wanted to do. Yes, do you remember how
became about that you ve started coming to the shows. Yes, I did when we had moved out here. Jordan was the only one at home. Still J was off at law school. While I have to think about that, maybe he was still in college. Bad Jordan was here summertime and you started taking the chosen. So of course we all
I wanted to come, but I thought I ve got to come and support you. So I came to that very first shaping broke in were the myth I want to go over people,
as relevant airy. Yes, she has, then I think you would get
looking to listen to me, but I want
people to know that you do
a whole lot more than just sit
in the audience, because Robin is my feminine side.
We have a lot of our guests or women alike,
our viewers are women and rob
keeps me and my lane, on the feminine sensitivity side cause really from a male perspective, its hard sometimes
to appreciate everything from a female point of view. If you don't have somebody, you trust I prepare these shows really in depth, and Robin is right by my side when I prepare him and she reads those books like I'd
and she ll say that. Listen, you don't want to go here. You don't want to be saying that you need to consider this point of view. Toe she's really helpful in putting the shows together and as the
years have unfolded,
have emerged as
number one hour, point person in our philanthropic things, because you ve created when Georgia smiled, which is our premier philanthropic endeavour, and you have also emerged as one of the leading ambassadors in a fight against domestic violence and victims of sexual abuse, men, women and chill
and the work you do and that has been game. Changing its been recognised on Capitol Hill. You do a whole lot more than just sit in the audience is sometimes that's all people see, but there's a whole lot more to it than that. He also thank you for saying that that I have to go back to that,
very first day of being in the audience, because just as today, like I said earlier this week,
The surprise two days go when you asked me to be here so now, I'm just so proud and so excited, but just as at first day that you started taping, I thought of course, I'm going to be there. I have to support you. I've always supported you because I'm being honest here today, I've always thought you were brilliant. I always thought that you could change the world come good, but I have to be serious right now. I'm just
always been in awe of your brilliance and when you are starting this show this was a huge change in our lives and our family and just everything
bout, our entire life, and so yes, I had to be here on that first day I had to support you and our life change, and so I sat there that first day, just again in awe tears in the brim of my eyes, just thinking. Oh my gosh. This is happening, and I will tell you
all of your listeners every day for seventeen years and now you're starting your eighteenth season. I still sit on the edge.
My chair, and I never take my eyes off of you, because I listen to you as if it is the first time I've ever heard. You speak as if I don't know what you're gonna say, but honestly most of the time, I finish your sentences, but I can't take my eyes off of you. I can stop listening. I dont know if that
is ever gonna come, but I dont think it will we'll large firms. You don't know what I'm gonna happen to turn for sure, but coming up in the first cycle,
we're gonna hit three thousand show where you ve been there
for every one of us here. What did you think was gonna? Have
when we came out here. Did you think we would be
eighteen years later.
Number one show and television. What did you think we're gonna have bad, but I'm not surprised at it. I didn't think that what did you say
do this for a while all forever or would you say I really thought we'd be her forever? I thought this is a positive change in our life. I've always trusted. You advised down that what ever you set out to do it would be a success.
Lesson we started out with nothing. So I've always known that one we did together whatever you started. Whatever path we took, we would feel like successes. I knew we would be happy and we would stick with it. So I never thought that we,
would not be here for the rest of our lives. You thought this was a because we ve now lived here long at the we lived anywhere. I now I knew so. This is help. Yes, I did.
Pursue we ve lived here longer even than those yes, and you know, I've always told you that growing up one goal in my life was to never have regret to do everything with the purpose of not having regret so I don't know. Maybe that help that work and to do this in we're gonna be successful and I've never doubted you that you're going to make it successful, and I guess that is because
I've always felt safe and I've always known that you would take care of me and our children we walk
away from a really successful life right right? It's right search. We had everything lined up. We had a beautiful home.
On the golf course in Dallas the office was less than a mile away the sports club, where we worked out and had friends and everything was half way in between
my memory? We had an orbit perfect. It was perfect in so many ways we had,
Arguably the number one
all science firm in the world business couldn't
in better. We were turning business down. We couldn't do everything that we were very
beware. We were so it was not an insignificant decision to walk
from their boys were thriving labored in school. They had friends girlfriends, they remember for tv, but the underline feeling I had was: let's do it, but scuff or in I love change. I loved change, but I never had a doubt. I never had a fear in my gut that we,
didn't do it. Our number one concern of course, was short and he was at home when he was only fifteen. He was ensconced in this life. It he loved. His school is France. His grandmother was there. He loved his coaches at the school life was
for him, and so he was our number. One concern would be
I always had a rule. It affected their body and a family
the rule was it takes for yeses, and one takes four: yes
to make the change and one no do not make the change that affected.
But here, but he had to be on board. I remember when I came home. I'd been to an open for four years. At the time I said, open, I've been talking and think it's time to do
my own show and I got to sneak
suspicion. This is gonna, be a full time gig, so were now,
I'm gonna, do it from here. So it's gonna be New York, Chicago relay and we ve
it decided is gonna, be away for a lot of production reasons. So what's everybody think well, you were
boxers. Before the end of the sentence, I mean you were like hell side me, a J was good for it. We wondered what Jordan was going to think cuz. He was captain of the basketball team baseball team.
At his friends left everything you're there member you ask him. What about your friend and he said, is a really good France they'll come and see me.
I have no doubt I'll make new friends and he said I'm sure the coaches there will be just as nice as they are here. I said yeah. Of course they will this funny things compulsory.
Because when we first got out here, he didn't know
a year and so
I remember when you went into his room and said: is there anything you?
we wanted to do that. You can do alone
did she don't know anybody can do without friends
He said I'm always
wanted to learn to play the guitar of always more deeply
well here's the deal. A is your dad gets home people. Take you to pick out a guitar wrote that was,
seventeen years ago may and last week he opened up on tour.
The Jonas Brothers and the American Airlines Arena in Miami Laden of twenty thousand people in just killed and just there to her
first night of the world? While you ask him that, in his room- and here we are full circles
he's at American Airlines arena fired and from all of us
People in Miami I just had a great time and to be changed what he wanted
So we were married forty three year. Why is it worked in your opinion? We
lot, why is it worked it out and we don't have the perfect Mary just cut that out there right now, because
people ask that now no one has the perfect marriage. We do not have the perfect marriage bad pictured over there and looked like a barber yourself. What was I thinking with all white on you? We should do it oversight and real. You haven't expense,
address, but what you pay for their address? Ninety nine dollars learning
dollars free waiting room and I had put it in layaway
Why was it idea? How much did you pay a week? Five dollars,
listen, I really don't
what layaway yet another. We don't wear alter that awful shit yeah.
Layaway, you would go pick something out. They would put it back.
And he would pay on legally, wouldn't let you take it home
pay ordinary wake until you paid off, then you could take it all right. You're right, I still have. The dress was a hundred bucks. Yes, and I guess, and all white tuxedo must have been
more than a black. What did I do? This objective must have been cheaper to re at white than it was a black one.
With the under Mr Tuxedo around it. For three hours, are we begged an ice cream man to loan it, but why has it worked because
we did our homework. I to sound like I've set in front of three thousand shows we really did do our homework, and you know this is just something I thought of just recently because someone
was asking me so many questions about ball. She knew was based on your company that you created before we
came out here.
And I shall tell me exactly what it was about. I said well courtroom sciences. It was to teach witnesses on the stand, to tell the truth, to testify effectively to oh, very interesting and supper just kind of
to me because she started asking about our marriage. This was not an interview I sit here. What's up just came to be, I said to her. I think, those first three years we were daddy. I was actually learning teaching myself to be his wife affectively, because those three years we spent learning about each other, asking the right questions and you
opened up to me. You became vulnerable to me. I saw the man I fell in love with and I will say to all the listeners and upset it before. I do believe in love at first sight, because I do believe I do know. I fell in love with you that very first night, even though you are really
caught and gravity and really gotta, not a warm and fuzzy, but I will search you had been said true, but I fell in love with you that first light, so we did spend three years getting to know each other and again did become vulnerable, and you did really tell me things that bothered you in the things that didn't bother you and I'll. Never ever to this day, forget them and
Oh because of those conversations that we had, I entered the marriage knowing what buttons to push. If I really wanted to upset you, I've never push those buttons, because you were born
you told me what will now I'm arteries? What was one of the button out? You don't push I'm right now there is a certain person. You wanted me to never compare you too true, and I've never done that. So there were
buttons that, because in those vulnerable moments you told me things and I have made a choice- never to do those, because I know in my heart I could do that and I can upset you. Why would I do that? And you didn't tell me those things that touches your hard or
it's you happy or what you need to know. I love about.
You truly a lesson I choose to do. Those things will more questions because I would ask him Karla Carl Bennington: is the executive producer of doktor fill in? Well? Really everything Keith is truly the brains. Definitely dear dear friend of Robert, yes, says Well says asking
What do you think we should talk about in? One of the questions she wanted us to talk about is
Was I doing and what were you doing when
We fell in love. What was it that idea? What was tat? I was doing that made you say: that's the one. You are trying your best to prove to me. You did not need me or any one else, your fine all by yourself, and I just don't know how you need me. So how much in your life you need me, you just don't know it, but I'm gonna prove it to you. We realized tat.
And you just got round woman fancy hadn't me like I'm on a mission. I have a goal and life and it doesn't include anyone to lose your job, but that these tried so hard to convince be he's
I'm all by himself. He doesn't need to be married. He doesn't need children
oh, ok with not having children, children right and if we ever have a don't expect me to take up anywhere with me.
Baby, sad, always that we're gonna take I'm not ever going to charge a barber, not ever
draw up anywhere without what gallop
like I'm for joining us not fill in the boys. Della tight he's like putting their heads is like
oh mom, bein eyes there good boys, always what I get. If I say hey,
Kitty S, J or Georgia to not dyke bourbon, your grandmother to hear all their good boys. They are good boys, they sure they're, perfect. You hear speeches. Archer s face origin.
And when I asked the question too, I thought it was your spirit. I thought you were really cannot spunky smart
which I found very entertaining. Actually I like that, because I know we broke up at one point. Yes,
Actually, you broke up kick me to curb, so I would go up
some other girl. Did I get rid of her and go home and call you and talk to you for five hours, and I thought you? What am I doing here,
If you only had any idea that when you're out talk well, I was talking to your mom and she was help and we helping me set up a little.
Tricks do no good for you, so we ve been married. Forty three years you been together for what, for
some forty six now almost seven. Yes, that's more than two thirds
live it. We ve been married for fifteen thousand six hundred and ninety five day. You got what I love about you. I would never ever even fake decanted up in days, I'm not worried about cyclic surreal approaches I now we
together longer than almost everybody in this room is a lie. I know I've got a cry, you did you graduate from high school in this light
after we ve been married. Twenty years I graduated from high school. That's
long time. Do you think there were highs low?
I obviously, when our children were born
still to be high rise. He asked yes, Joe
was born in
seventy nine September, twelfth eighteen, seventy nine years. What do you remember about that? Ah? Well, everything
course, but I can remember being at your mother's, how I can remember the day of baking like six pumpkin pie. Is,
and this huge, we all, of course- and of course I knew what that members still didn't believe it.
Ever he came a week early. He came on my father's birthday.
We read your mother tongue delivering pumpkin pies in my water broke. It is surreal everything in raced home- and this is
probably nine p M, raise some to get my suit case every one of us to pack, and now they had a vague. They do that, but we get to the hospital.
Maybe it was ten
p M in my father's birthday was the next day after midnight, diet of us so stupid via the nurse. Is there any way we can hold this off until midnight she went will thus it yes, yes, go. You hold it office for Polish birthday. I water broken shoe. It you're, not gonna. Have this baby and two hours and I having fourteen hours later you joy, was,
a week old when we had to take him for surgery. He was three weeks out better than it was a week up when he started all the symptoms highlights denounces the issue there, but he was projected vomiting every time. I would feeding cheered across the railroad about something wrong and of its just a nervous.
Reckon. I took him to the doktor rule one morning I woke up and he didn't wake up all night long because he was so weak all of the food. Every time we feeding it. Wouldn't shoot out and then his stomach grit shut. I ran down the hall and there he was not only car. She had already gone to work and I called you.
Gesture and re steam into the doktor and he said, call the dad and having meet us at the hospital,
you D added. They realised what was wrong and I'll. Never forget like cried out, but they put the low ivy in his
little tiny hand and he had sob so much. He was just tv and you said I'll carry him into the operating room and I just watch the two of you go down the hall and you were so vague that little tiny head was just ready, your shoulder and he was still heaping and all I can say with that. Little tiny! Oh, oh! Well! What is that
this figure the little tiny his will.
Look at you, three o grandma was just about to cry. Thinking of your daddy, Weird Board, London. How are you doing with us braces Bree has the money goes through becomes brim emerged soon, go check on your hamsters,
Ah that sells wait all looking kid he had been so cute. Have you got in your new kid? He had not yet of that so swayed
I will say something about this family. We love animals live animals. We would have a lot more than that. I allowed you could imagine the less. They wondered various ducks in their backyard. Now that would be really you about dogs show
and then, when you come over, you gotta go play golf pops again we had found in we Europe,
golfer years ago for all tell you what am I
Avery will bake a cake again.
Grandma came three tiered cake here. She picked out the three sizes
it's on it, then all kinds of stuff
there. You have it
when you do your site,
was impressive. Eddie do the Happy Gilmore for his dad. We got back, ran about twenty yards tee and yet also cheap, so Jays with Jordan right.
We're missing links with Jordan vandalism.
You're right now a couple days. I love that he surprised him.
No one's ever found him in the job that morning. How was it like
inside the EU.
In the morning was sleeping. Sunlight work provides an omen, eleven Herbert those your brothers. They couldn't pleased for sure, we'll guys like you for quality and surprise and ass. I was
the every London we love. You will see you later lobby rearguard Lovey, Erika babies,
Ah aren't they pressure they precious. We were talking about Julia to have surgery.
I remember cuz. I was on staff at the hospital. So let me carry him into the operating room, it wasn't horrible surgery, but it's never risk free
put a baby under general decision three weeks old till there was a scary time. It was sad scary and I just dreaded every time I had to feed a because on site. He wants to fate the baby. There is always say: projectile bargaining gave us projectile vomiting went across the room, you never knew how much he kept in and it just aggressively got worse and after two weeks have it we had rushing in there and
ah, but he grew up healthy and strongly urged her. So he took the red. I flew into my army, AIR Jordan. When he kicked off tour and I said to you, I am so shocked that J has not gone into be there for Jordan on this first performance to their seven years. Apart with their thickest, summing J thinks it. We had Jordan,
As for him, like the minute, Jordan was worn J as issues ok I'll take over you did too maybe did who do you?
It was easier, J, your Jordan, oh it's hard to say, because J helped me or his toward him, but I think tat he
Has been a little may and his entire life it was like he was born. A man he's had the need to run
take care of me when you're gone he would be six years old and you'd be working laid in a conference or you would be out of town and he Turley felt the need to step in and take over. If we would go out to dinner,
He was in charge of everyday again. He just always been like that. He likes to run things in his
Sweden kind hearted in I don't know, he's just
always ban, just easy which were abusing smoke like you charted in
No, I don't know Jordan has so much like you and so me
the way. So I'm gonna have to switch and say charity, but, above all, because I can remember, J was sick.
There is already informed me he needed a novice set up in his bedroom. He needed a suit and brief case, because he was that we just like his daddy from that take forward at this hour. There's just so much above them. That really is you, but then they have a lot of traits of their personality. That would meet me to do
here? We always do shows about in laws. Why can't you, unless you think we hired here? I think that were very sweet, supportive in laws very sweet and support it. We had door Erika and we support her- a hundred percent creating her family, her life with J and our children, and I think that's what she does.
Herbs, and I think that's what they deserve. My always have we never go over. There were not the type of endlessly just show up, and I've always been there
even when they were without children or when the boys lived on their own, I don't believe in just showing up at their home. I don't believe in going over there. I don't even believe in inviting myself, I think, that's their home, that's their world and they deserve privacy, and so I think we're very
polite, sweet kind and supportive in luxury definitely respect boundaries were, unfortunately, we get invited LE yes get. The kids
block at her house, and also I mean that's great, so I think we're very blessed in that regard
Ah, you are so precious wages vested with Erika at the babies,
here! You are young, you do a boy,
Euro zone as outlined by yes. We are so we're
I am in Miami, haven't salvage, fired Jordan's officially on the road again a ball. Are you so proud of your brother? My god, you have no idea what was amazing.
The drop in him off for college. Oliver praise ears elsewhere. I was just tell her, not everyone that you were like out waiting for us to have Georgia because he wanted to take over and you dad you bid like his father S, big brother, but we had him disillusioned, easy standing there watching whom on stage was one thing, then turning around and watching
Those people watch him on stage with something completely different and I don't think there's anything in the world that can equal or give you the same thrill a you know landing an airplane now graduating from some university. No, the thrill in the energy that you must get from having those people scream.
Dancing, they all put their lights up in the air. When he asked you, I don't think anything could rival what he experienced on that stage.
Oh now verb hundred more times, at least when it
there is no single and you turn around and scanned the arena
we're lights on phones all the way up into the top rafters? I couldn't believe it,
I could neither neither did he. He said that it took everything he had not stop. Seeing go wow
starting again, I love that you were there when you think about the fact that your parents of unmarried forty three years there is a long time to be met.
Are you dad? Was it what I was pulling for here of oh, I mean yeah. Now is not even a surprise here there you go get your mom is like a canopy. That's exactly I'm a gas today on his podcast, some very proud. I know that
Distinguished the list of people fight out forty three years is a long time, but you gotta admit it's been a pretty good right for you as a kid. You know. I have Cyril compliance good answer, seven, that time when I was fourteen years now, what happened at the like this with dead,
you had to shave when you at the school girl school, not shaven in a call and say you have to come getting hidden, Schaefer School he's out a beer. Everything was tat. He got me on the way to get mom you're making me shape again. I'm like ok guys. Let me problems on this for you. If you're solution to me not shaving, as I can't go to class, then we are on the same day.
J. Why are you complain in your out of class level and discovery for its work as they sent me to the gender issue? You gotta admit this has been a good run. I think we're pretty good
bad parents. You have to admit pretty good baby, oh yeah,
every day. They love nothing more than coming over there. We just talk to they re in London.
It's called him with America and we talked about playing golf and bacon cakes and having a good time how it has been a
family oriented summer? I spent four hours floating in the ocean a couple days ago, teaching of Malta Wake Board and they beg dozens of cakes, and I gotta say I'm gonna say that picture view in London playing golf ravages. That form was perfect. He really nail.
Yeah really did he read it me out about the fifty servants here we did a burn out with a fish tail. That's great
believe you told that's great. You ll have to ask your. He bought a new guitar this week in its fifty seven, whatever I know anything about the tyres, but it's fine that you get the fifty cent
Aren't you get the fifty seven guitar a dark? Are they get super
She went down there to be with your brother yeah. I wanted to give him his. Let him do is thing, but at the same time, I like your secretly via ticket unstoppable, sneak in what do I do
I definitely didn't want to miss him. He wanted you to be there for sure. I thought we deaf
should stay away. You and your mom and dad their rockstar with your folks
What are you gonna do? I'm gonna had here. What's ice requires lobby manner cited. It is a levy to mom. Congratulations on forty! Three year, thank you. We love you boy, let me to see later my guys, parental, safe,
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ending the right stand for you. We ve been
the other so long that through
our marriage. We ve lost all free.
Or other apparently ass. We lost
your mother. For then, who was-
It was at your daughter. My dad is my dad.
Your dad and was not tat their mother? Yes, and then my mother, she was such a sweep. Sweet woman.
When I lost my mother so suddenly- and you called
your mother. She loved me so much
told her what was happening and where we were that we were at the hospital in she rushed
to see me and she,
again in a moment she saw me in such distress and sell. It said she had a heart attack. We check her into the hospital, thankfully, in God, by she survived bed. She was in there for a week, because the stress of seeing me so upset Cosette was a shock
We lost your mother instantaneously without any warning whatsoever and was on the phone and she passed in that we just been disconnected agitated,
was definitely hard time for me with you, because
time we ve been held and we ve been married. At that point we had been made
it made me nine years, because I think that was the first thing that I had been able to fix. You tried, we got
to the hospital and we were in the emergency room and I was on staff at that hospital as well
so I was in the.
Trauma room with her and when they called it.
We had you and the doctors lounge with family down there and when I had to walk
from that trauma room down to
Doctors lands to tell you, I couldn't fix this one. She didn't make it that's a long walk up ever taken yeah. I can, and me is seriously I in my laptop those toughest staff cashiers though vibrant than alive, but you're when you go through things like that, I think it wells the relationship together in a way that you just don't have it. You don't go through. Those things is not. It is good to go through them, but it has a profound effect. Ass, yes, shocking. As a first time I really experienced staff have someone I latin distant relative may be back. It was the first time that I actually had to experience,
The finality of gas in the holidays were right after that, and it was so tired. I sat there in rough. Those thank you. I'm just kidding, I'm not written, but how do we not was a pivotal moment, our relationship, but we ve grown through and learned through a lot of things. What you saw get away
She had gotten really really depressed. Obviously, when she lost her mother and was just really carried down for the cap,
what really got her up out of bed. Was she just felt the absolute need
to write, notes to all of the wonderful people that had been so nice and supporting
so she got out of bed. She went into the dining room table and said
Erin rode out hand, written personal note to every single one of unfair night three days for three days, there was a bundle of em and the she finally finished in, I think felt better
oh yeah, for it and I was leaving the girl. The office in sea gave him to me to mail and I play
tennis every day of my life and they wound up in my tennis bag, which I didn't get in that day,
as whether turn bad, and it stayed bad for like ever.
I mean really it disturbed by rain for like two weeks, some horrible amount of time and then it finally broke and she went to look
my tennis bag to make sure I had everything I needed
and there were those thank you notes that I had every intention
but I didn't get in the mail I
down, I didn't send those notes and I fell like that-
and when I saw you with that, look on your face that you felt that big away. It's ok did I not I like,
which made me feel even worse. You were so big about it now. I said why did I say I'm so sorry
Ok, it's ok! You said I will personally drive to everyone's Homan Hand, deliver them and TAT
damn it's like honour will no doubt have been. I start really horrible.
Oh, oh just put him in the mail today I'll get him tomorrow.
All the boy was already less adverb: you'd family wage level, labored, listen because you'd seen some.
At the store, and they didn't mention the note I addressed this matter at that point. I just I thought they do was more of something I guess I needed to grieve, but it was a pivotal moment for me, then, to do it's more important, that you know that it's ok,
then they know because Enough Cabot Pass not far about Phil. I could biggest the text that I hated that I feel terrible still feel terrible that I still feel terrible. I felt more terrible. Ok, you were gonna get. I loved were definitely way
You when I thought about that again is when my dad died and
My mother had been married. Fifty three!
eighty four years and
hardest thing in the world was to tell my mother just my dad had gone to teach Sunday School and died at the front of his Sunday school class.
And you're the one told my mother, because I
brazen over there and.
I was file when the ambulance to the hospital
about half way there. They turn their lights off and stop drive and fast, and I thought well not too hard interpret what this means, but you're the one at collar and told her name is everywhere and had gone over to earlier said. Don't let her come yet. Let's see what happens in such a state, him wait in the gas market,
rubs like ok was. It was tough, but I think that we ought to be aware that one her we ve been married for forty three years.
Gotten along, and all that it's because we ve been in the trenches together, we ve been Vauxhall. Together, we dealt with those things that are the things that truly matter and dug out from those things, and
I think that's the glue right. That's right! It's the highs and lows, and those are the things it
I really there may J when he was sick and the other most
dared I've ever been in the forty three
there's that we ve been married
Do you know when it is now tell me you know me
I don't get scared. I dont get anxious. I get on tat, I've crashed airplanes and verify.
Make dead in a field in an airplane. Don't think I died scared because I didn't I died busy,
Thought the way I react, but the man
scared, I've ever been was
over Thanksgiving when Jordan was in
junior high that they call now middle school. We took him man because she had something
wrong with his leg. He could just barely touch it and it was some
Kind of really bizarre
one in ten million tumor
in his ship. It was either benign and they would pop it out and fill it in
All that was it
you're in a world of travel, the twenty four hours it took, two
yet that answer.
Was the most scared I've ever been in
I entirely yes, I agree that
They help me to understand people when they describe fear and anxiety and paralysis and stuff, because there's nothing I could do. I was
There is no heel, I could climb. It was no wall I could run through. There was no effort. I could make there's nothing. I could do but pray ass. That's exactly, I suspect,
very just putting him in the hospital payment surgery and having them take it out
to find out what it was and it turned out that it was ok, but there was the longest
twenty four hours of my life. Yes, I agree
never told him what the gravity
it was because he was just a child had been playing football in school.
Came humming, told us about how much it heard. There was a time when they left did. You have emptied out syndrome, yes, said no. I had in the nest syndrome before they laughed and it was
harder with J, because I guess of the unknown. I don't know. I just know that leading up to it. I got really sad. I was saddened reflected on his life and thought about
the fact that he would soon be moving out of their humming going away somewhere else, and I couldn't walk into the room and check on him. Ask him if he was hungry just mother ham. So, oh, I was very sad and reflective.
All the time I just watched myself through the day without even the home, and that was very
tat in taking
him down there being busy and setting up in his home and seen how excited he was helped. So much, and I know we dropped him
in Austin and we were maybe fifteen miles out of town and I had to let it go and just cried and cry. But at the same time I did
Jordan upset. He was in the car and honestly at that point I didn't cry as much, and I wasn't sad because I saw this great step in his life and how he was excited for it.
So. It was really they sat ass before he laughed.
But they are now. I had that one little crimes fell, but
then now not after they had never been Jordan laughed. I didn't. I had this pride that we had prepared them so well for it. I wouldn't for a minute, stop them from that next step in life. So I didn't have that. No completely differ reaction,
You remember because I knew what they were getting ready to do. Rather more fatalities, J at University Texas in Jordan. It s a mere matter. They get ready,
have a good. I got a new said: oh don't be a sad Jays gonna have the time of his life, and I said that's fine, but what, if he's hungry and one of his clothes need hired eater? Yet what if he does every food in his kitchen how's that gotta go
just like debate like ahead right, rake, overclose, you're, worried about that might know. She's you drive and soon I didn't
people iron dress me. Then you have to put up with this closer
and then one night I walked into the library in our home and you write your desk and it was like one thirty in the morning and I walked by and you're on the phone with aim on the speaker from it.
Your listening to all this friends. There all tell me about this experience. They just gone through this peeping Tom
but the girl, sorority, and they were all after him, and I was like what are you hungry, I'm just gonna, believe it and then I had discomfort, knowing I shouldn't
Even try to wonder or even try to think about what's going on in his life right down. This proves it just good. They were fine. They were
you're laughing there tell the story. There laugh Egon. I just thought: ok, no more wars!
Oh said their shaking my head: it s a mucus, your fiction, Jordans.
Dorm room up gas, he's fiction, it just ride and put everything over here and I'm thinking man. You are so wasting your time because we had the
really nice penthouse type condo that we kept in Dallas
over the plaza remember yes, we didn't hit
city limits beforehand.
Was out of the door and into that he lay
Was there until I told him when he comes out, he had the blue didn't admit going over there and tell you told him tat. I had to call the shap at the restaurant baron deliver food because he was set road. So what do you think about living in the public eye? Because she grew up in Dakota, Goma, small town, her dead had the driving range
in Duncan Oklahoma. He was the golf. Throw their driving rage and dug Oklahoma is a pasture with some golf ball than one end of it. I go
they didn't have a tractor to pick him up right. It's right did you put on it.
Amateur anything you're should avoid opened on Saturday mornings. I had got there. Did you get a wagon or take work? It would you dont, get sweat tape, buckets and then my father would drive a car with a back on it and pick up the bucket set. We failed. We just drop em in red, carry to it and then he'd give us one. When we ran out that, yes, we had to walk the wholesale pick it up balls. I took my tablet. I hated it those your job of early warning. Yes, on disorders,
Yes, he did know there were snakes out their own ass. Our stop. Don't even go there right now. Are you serious? You think there were
in Oklahoma. Yes, but it was a driving range. Was a bold snakes. No, oh! This is driving range. I shouldn't go here. The language not only interrupted, are you kidding? I want? No, I don't think that bad. I never thought tat
make sure, and I was they
oh man, so a big difference between pagan I've got balls and pasture and dug local home.
They hung over rattlesnakes and if you were glove here somewhere collapse boots.
No! I don't think I wore boots, oh my god. Oh man, so a big difference between big it. I've got balls and pasture and dug in Oklahoma, delivered in the public eye for the last twenty years. What do you think about the it's different, but we don't go out much
but yes, we're in the public eye and I find with it will work, but when we go well with well, yes, we do and where, in the public eye honestly it's ok, we have adjusted. I have to give life
credit right now to opera. I honestly believe that, without heard it would have started differently because
as she would call all the time
and prepare me and tell me what to expect and again I welcomed this change. People love you that's another thing when we are out in public people, love you so much. So it's not like were confronted with negative it. He when someone comes up to us,
I was a cabin rose. Coloured glass is right now because yes, there's a lot of negativity out there when it comes to tabloids and false reports in that kind of thing, but I learned to live
because I know my heart what's true and I'm proud of
and I'm proud of. Why were here it was a decision. We talked about thought about made the decision in I've embraced it and I love our life here removes different. It is very different, so do you think you ve changed over the last almost fifty years that we ve been together?
Ah, I become a stronger woman. I become more focused on the new
diverse, we ve taken. I believe I've set goals and I don't stop until I get there and I.
Proud of the roles I've taken on as a woman, a wife
mother and grandmother. I am very satisfied with how I've lived my life. You do a lot of different
I've always thought of you livin in places like you thought you were put on.
Deserves to be a mother, and so you wanted to focus on kids in family.
And put other things on hold and then, when the kids were
then gone in you knew they had traction were successful. Then you turn to other things. You ve written
to New York Times best sellers number one best sellers, you have a very successful business. You ve been very active philanthropic.
Quickly. You dont all these things that you didn't do
Four, because you had other priorities and when those things were done, then you should ok. My turn I'm gonna do
things some passion about, and so I've watched you be passion
and very successful as a mother and wife and then be very passionate and successful as a businesswoman philanthropist
and the television personality and all of those things. So I gotta think Euro is there anything you can do, and I have tat sapping say right now that when you describe my
Mother my focus their it's true. I really grew up wanting to be away.
And mother and I've said numerous times. I do believe I was put on this earth to nurture a family, and I Catholics
If we allow that to happen been coming into my life also, I can not even tell you what age how
I always knew a focus of mine was to nurture myself
take care of myself
my family in my role as the matrix
the family was always but
was the reason I was put on this earth men. I think back also that I never ever felt that I wasn't as important and I'm glad for that. I'm happy about that. Now I looked back
and realized that was the stepping stone, or that was the rock that allowed me to be
yes success as a wife and a mother and everything I do in my life that if I had not believed it myself believed that I could do it. I don't think I could have done. It will obviously
financially comfortable at this point in our life. Fortunately, don't you agree that we were just as happy
in a one bedroom apartment in didn't taxes as we are now? Oh, yes, yes,
I'll make it has to do with money.
Think when we lived in din- and I was right in the ten speed by
not a school, and we were living in a one bedroom apartment with zip.
Zack. I thought we were just as happy. Then, as we are now. I completely agree.
I was driving that sixty to comment that I paid two hundred it.
Twenty five dollars for Ed
didn't now. I mean I knew there were nicer cars. Of course I do there were better cars, but I wasn't sad. I didn't
what better car I didn't sit around go on? This is not what
I dreamed of no. I thought I was alive
in a castle with you that what bedroom apartment now I never thought that we suffered ever.
May I come home at night cut through that field
ten speed buying you'd be their weight and when they were led me fast because I was gonna do therefore. Yes, he said I was always sitting at the end of this complex there, the end of our role of departments on the steps with a glass of ice, tee
waiting for you know the long time ago, and I still fix, I guess my stay, what you like in the top right, we were happy land is like we are now. Yes, we were. I have something else here to share their just came in
sorry, I'm not, I feel, like I've got away from touring the country to say anniversary workers.
I'm here for job. He could jollier bodies should live video
I see it up there.
Everybody there. What he's probably get up awhile. He should say that what I said was so sweet of him. Yes,
good job, you're you're, a doll fell out you're. Just at all, you did that you got all that time. Will you
like curtain, cats faster, all so sweet with
I wanted a register in till you happy anniversary for that.
He had a good time they dislike. We do now. Things seem different phases. We ve
I different houses, different cities, different challenges.
Burdens we ve.
Is found a way to make it work too
laugh and have a good time.
Every step of the way dislike, we do now in our system
We will continue to do so because we want to you now with I want it to its men, but we wine, you suspect,
It suspect we will
you pick me out early on. Yes, I first night, first night, yes, personality,
took her horseback riding on our first date,
it was really well let s. Do you get a debt to growers back riding? It would really well until around quarters. I get this cavern,
There are literally take your work programme. He took me up in european ideal,
they were written, thereby reform, Hamerton everyone- it was at night time which was bonus, is beautiful. I was scared and then you got tricky had started doing all these circles in then you started like up and then down like.
Oh my god, I told you before. Do you want to see how tough, I was afraid tat presented, throw up, though you drew up close
There are certain things we ve learned not to do to write shelter it you don't coach Robin
Are you back to make me? No, no, I'm just saying you don't coach, you we don't play tennis together, get show true coach and robbers like
advertising a care advice ass to because you shall guy do is like trying to put a cat in a bucket you'd. Do less desultory, I'm not going to argue with you, but if I ask to be couched coach me, but if I don't ask to be couches, you step upstart coach me: that's not gonna work. When you ass, you go coach. You just right now
If I ask, then you can go to a million. Women are different well, but used.
This out the high criticise it
No, no one will have coped Joe. I'm saying you to learn about each other. That's that's right! Men! Let me just say a package in doubt: ask fillip to culture there. You go Tsar guy. Why? But why does anyone else can ask you? But I'm not gonna, ask you to catch me because you get something
I told you to do it this way. The man you gotta coach, you, the way you want to become switches. Five, this national radio say sweetheart hand
tell you that that way, I should do it this way
Men and women are just different district.
Men go to a party and they see somebody in the same outfit. There like buddies for life, women, the completely different right, some women, someone and yes, I actually dont mind that I think it's fun. It's got a funny and I go straight to that person. We both at great taste.
But there's difference the arrival. We have accommodated, learn quickly. You may,
it may live longer, really yeah there.
More willing to die
laughter. He set me. Ok, how else are we, therefore? It? Will you like shoes,
lot of shit, I'm not another guy from the minute. We got married, a means,
you like shoes, allow younger a bowling alley and get a pair for two dollars exactly he's there were Bali choose every day? Well, I got to Paris
is that not enough, as one term where another pair of standby attorney you have more than two pair, but I'm not gonna willing at bottom, I'm have she's,
Yeah, you do love shoes just the other day. You want
my my cause. You don't come here. Did you hear? I said Bob Discos eight now before brat de Witt? It's all my fault and can block it. Did you die?
Yes, I did a guy. I didn't say: yes, you are right, it's my fault. I sit over then come back here, so you ve got some new year. Starting yes, which is a podcast called what I've got a secret here, such really keen eyed egg is yes, I think you should do a pod cast at. I said. Ok and you said just decide what it is you
to talk about and in think the name. So I could remember coming home one evening. You are sitting a we're having dinner and you were serving something on my planet
Oh I've got a name for my podcasting, you said what is it now? It not only have to be looking at me when I tell you, because when you look
May I put my hands up to my mouth like I was about to shout something, and I said I've got a sacred you at all and you loved it, and so yes, it's com. I've got a secret because it's gotta be about everything.
It's gonna be about every being that any one man and man really would ever want to know and a pretty much could stop right there, but it's gonna
the sacred to having the best sex? It's because our starve,
I don't know why, but who were Hillis goose girl with yeah you're gonna be the first up. Ok, so it's the secret to
knowing when to leave a bad first date, this sacred to throw the best dinner party,
the secret to finding the right doctor the secret to so. I encourage all women for any age at any age to send in questions
because I believe that a lot of women are living the life they want to live, but they always have this
one nagging cash. I wish I knew the secret to and then my life would be perfect,
or some women may have ten or fifteen, maybe even twenty. If I only had the secret to this, my life would be perfect,
I have this nagging pain and it's not bad enough to go the doktor, but I just wish I knew the sacred to whatever and I plant have exe
its well known people that maybe all listeners can relate to with that issue, and just every podcast will focus on one or two subjects and we will go
so many answers to the secret that everyone wants to know. I feel like over my entire life period and that the events that have happened in my life and the research I've done, because no, I can't
such things are now if I can find out enough information by something that interest me. So I feel like I have the secret to allow
the things that are about child ray.
In about marriage about everything that interest rate- and so I am not an expert at everything I will bring in those experts but all relate to all of my personal experiences
well. This is just a general podcast of every facet of your life that if you knew the secret
to one area
in your life one or two or three
will expand on it. You go well think of all this information.
Replied to my life to live the happiest healthiest most fun most interesting. I'm then assure them
with my family. I want to share this with my friends. I had a friend just the other day asking. I need to know the secret to breaking up with a friend who just
Doesn't want to have fun anymore or who has become a new sense of this just a lot of things. People want to now and I'm gonna bring them
you know they will say on this, not a secret. Until you tell somebody veto,
we do not know what this thing is: Thursday,
You tell somebody so you're didn't tell secret aside to people, try picket I've gotta keeping someone sacred thing.
Did tell someone, but they don't want it told to anyone I'll, keep that secret for you, but I'm not good at keeping my secrets, like I don't like to hold on to something that I think I can
share with someone else. It might change their life
You do Rama girl revelation now that you're gonna shoot it at your headquarters. I am I am. I said yes, I have my office is a beautiful headquarters from a girl revelation dot com or things only website, but the headquarters is on site.
quarters you're gonna shoot it right. I guess I can't an area that office in too perfect spot for I've got a secret simplified
I know you have to answer some questions. You gave me these costs
genes and told me, I should ask people these at the end of my ipod, yes telling the brain, so I'm gonna ask you to fill in the blanks you wrote.
So. Have you wrote some of it? Are you gonna? Do us, maybe a guy, but first before we go to those
what advice to you have four young couples or any couple.
Either struggling or of their just starting out to make it
because you ve, made it work and I'll give you full credit. I always tell people you ve made it work for
Forty three years, what you're Bush to young couples to move your work? My advice is never stop visiting with each other, never stop this dean and asking each other questions about each other and about them. How was your day who'd you spend? It was just a question like that, but thing an if you know that it's gotten to
point where you changed, the dynamics have changed. I have those long conversations and always begin with that ship off your shoulder, because when you have a chip on your shoulder, he had that little edge,
You're, just not gonna get anywhere take that ship off your shoulder soften. Have that desire in your heart to really make a change. If you can't do that, then you have to wait until
you do and if you can't, then you need to have that conversation, because a couple must always have a willing spirit to make each other happy and it starts with just have one on one conversation you have to get back. There can talk to someone that has a chip on their shoulder resentment anger, especially of its
for you, but I just think that so important to always get back to where you were when it was just the two of you and you can be vulnerable and have that love between you that convinces each other. It will always be you. It will always
that you I'm not going anywhere. You will always be you. I would request
in this way we have always
said no matter what happens whatever it is.
Grim it we may have.
The relationship is not the stakes for which we play a lot of people.
All getting arguments and they say well I'll, just get a divorce or what
word is never been spoken in our home and no matter what
The debate is we realise the relationship?
is not on the table.
who's all over we're gonna still be together. We know that it's never a question it's
ever an issue. We do
hold it over each other's head. It's not that intimidation,
factor that all this could blow the whole thing up. That's never an issue, that's not! The stakes are which reply and I think people need to decide either. That's the deal or it's not, and if that's off the table then
everything else. Canada shrinks in comparison is like
regular divorce over this? No within China, whatever silly come on it's just another day,
you're out, so I think we will need to you re the married you. You know
That's why I would answer there. What's the best anniversary present, I forgot you yelling exactly like this
I hope I can say without crying on our twentieth wedding anniversary, but I've got to tell a few details. You took me to dinner at those
beautiful hotel, downtown in Dallas and even booked a room which had there was some old man,
It is probably the one and only time you ve done that in the EU deranged her,
maybe said in we had done
and then you gave me this book of poetry. Six months he wrote twenty poems for twenty years. You had gone through all of our photos and you picked photos
that actually were from that year and some reflected the poem and was so beautiful and the last poem he wrote was if life for a garden and I could walk through again you're the flower. I would pick for another twenty years
and you had abandoned black leather and the title was in silver early if it was just beautiful. Yes, that was it
I deliberately or another twenty years we're just yet. We are forty, three twenty two years later as being for what
I have to say the best anniversary present that you ve got me were the things that you ve made you made
this incredible video
should I twain
Free. I involved and had been black patent leather pads, Joe
parry shot. The video
You were. Should I a TWAIN and it was
amazing and then for the first
the anniversary you.
At your wedding, dress out gas and oil and
It is this amazing painting and
put together a video to hear assigned than last year, which was really great
and then there was another which actually was a birthday present. Were you took over them?
really hills, hotel and converted. It
just when you play the video, that's an I pay person
Nightwing, video of man. I feel like a woman with all your friends at the time. I think you thought I wasn't very impressed with it.
Just speechless. I thought it was amazing. What's the biggest strangest favour you ever did for me
me a favor. I did for you know what the answer to this is. Ah I got at that as cookies and I sat and you'd been in a garage all day trying to find
travel in your car, and you came in the kitchen and do we have
favour, and I'm not sure I just aging
come out here and get in the trunk of the car. You had the trunk open. You had seemed Taos in the car but gone in the bathroom and pulled the decorative cows that no ones
to touch an you laid out in the trunk, and you said if you could just get
in the trunk. I'm gonna start the car and maybe you could hear
the rattle, I said sure, but then you closed the trunk. You get a car. You started up now, Michael what and you back out of the garage- and I feel this bob.
You ve, backed out of the driveway area, into the alley you drive
out of the alley and drive across to this cul de sac from our house right across, and you start doing circles in that.
Zack I didn't know the truckload was gonna, let you were the first to hold out the whole debt.
Screaming? Stop the car stop the car it throw me all,
but the trunk finally use
up the car. I hear you get out, you can any of the car drunken online.
I have here out, I'm crying and you look at me and you said: did you hear anything overhaul?
They tell me anything: I'm screaming trunk wasn't seen. Postal were bleeding, the truck wasn't supposed to urge had hidden.
Bob and lastly, hairs say you can. Even what get me in the blood hereby did everything you just can't
I think she's, exaggerating she's a graduated, our word now I remember I was yesterday, and I said you did you already. They.
Yeah. They're gonna hear what you said when I opened the trunk, I get tired little be far off the air.
Strangest favor I ever did for you. I don't know of thick out ever go for that. What was the favourite it?
I don't know what we ve got your password to be reversed. Oh well, you didn't ask for.
No! I didn't, but I want to get the strangest favour is surprised me, competitors practices. I got my vasectomy reversed.
Now we have the tools to she, wanted this one, Jordan
If you could leave right now and go do blank, you would do cause you ve always wanted to, but never told anyone is it a woman's present. I've told you that now
We have been told overview downward ever today. What that, but I would love to go visit a woman's prison in dispute with the women of always wished. I could blank, but life just got in the way I've always wished. I could live in Paris really
If I could step my fingers and a blank sitting in front of me, I would tell them blank my sister, the hardness her.
You talk about your sister said last just recently,.
I've never told anyone that I blank, because I know no one would believe me. I can lessons add on my task. I scored at the level of an FBI marksman.
That's true here you don't wanna come in. Our house asked the nicest thing I've ever done was blank, and this is
first time, I've ever told it
now the nice
thing I've ever got. You ve never told anybody. When I was working and I quit my job because I was pregnant with J, so I was
an industrial engineer technician and I would go out onto the plant floor at certain teed and I would do time studies for incentive pay on the people on the line and they were thrust. Talk to me was the day before Thanksgiving. I ask this one girl, big plan.
For Thanksgiving she said. No, I said why not she said. Well, I have three little kids and I can't afford to cook Turkey in my husband left me.
But just really sad so,
We won't have Thanksgiving dinner. This was the week of Thanksgiving actually because I wait
it after work, and I watched to wish
He walked to her car and I went to do.
She storm bought everything she would need for a think. Skippy now and the next day I went and put it in our car. I've never told anyone that I never told her. It was me too good thing.
I just now. I have to answer him. If I could leave right now, go do
blank I would cause I've wanted to, but never really said it. I would go guiding us
I everything, but I've never flown glider well, have flung ladders. It were meant to be going
here's the edge equip, but I really want to go gliding like in the mountains and I've just never done it. I've always wished I could,
lying, but life just got in the way learned a dance I've just never, because I have horrible real. I just wish I could learn to dance. He should take lessons. Well now my knees were like really bad so
If I could snap my fingers and have blank sitting in front of me, I would tell them interesting Lee. It would be your sister Cindy if I could have her sitting in front of me. I would tell her I'm sorry. I didn't pull it off.
You did everything you could cause she deserved to still be here. We ask you to everything
The nice thing I've ever done was blank and is the first time I've ever told it.
Give an embarrassing amount of money to animal rescue and
people say or what about people we do that too, but I'm really.
Passionate about animal rescue, but I do it anonymously. I have a story tat per year, but that that go ahead
But when you are in your office in which TAT falls and new parked in the back and across the valley, there was this garage apartment and you
would tell me about this. Little boy who lived up there with his mom and his aunt in Ali had was a ball to bounce too plain he would.
I turn when you get out of the car and you asked what he wanted for.
Christmas, and he said. Ah, we don't do Christmas
It's just my mom and my aunt and we can't afford Christmas. You said what is Santa gonna bring and he does my mom
said Santa might not know where our home as whatever- and you said I want to ask- is his aunt: if it's ok
she takes them somewhere and you nuclear
it with her that we go into the apartment it upstairs and leave some things in. She said yes, but she didn't tell em. She took her sister in her nephew out too
lunch and during that time we took up a little Christmas tree. We decorated it and we put a little bicycle that
but he wanted anyone, a Dallas, cowboy shirt, football, helmet, Jersey and his mom, like hey I'm. So we took a ham, and you had me pick out some things for the mother in the ant and insists unwell toys and we just stuck up there. We did at all, and then we had in your office with the lights out and watch them, go up there and see it as he could see the tree twinkling from the street.
He never knew it was you within he told you the next week when you went to work. He ask if it with you never told him. He said now must have been Santa desperately snake first month, delay was fun
Will we ve been talking a long time and I hope people
I've enjoyed it. When we talk about things. We haven't usually talk about anything
I'll say that we have said.
be merry tee. I love you will love you too.
It is not easy interviewing your wife, it's just not including arrest them
what I'm getting out? I ever know gonna say, but that's what this is forty three
so maybe I'll interview again only fifty. What do you think? Let's do it? It's a date.
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Transcript generated on 2020-01-24.