« The Rachel Hollis Podcast

271: Growing Your Intuition

2022-04-12

Hi y'all! I love today's topic because it is a question I got from y'all. Or more specifically, this is a question I got from Stephanie in Ohio. She called into the hotline to ask this one: I'm trying really hard to listen to my gut in like my inner knowing, but I feel like I'm constantly second guessing myself and I'm debating whether I'm making the wrong decision. So...how do I know the difference between what's my gut and what's my head?

I think as women we're told that we are supposed to have this deep, that we were born with an intuition that guides us. And that is 100% the truth. You are supposed to have that, but it's not your fault that you don't! Most of us from the time we were little girls have been told that someone else knows best. So I really want to dig into this question, and let you know that if you're feeling this way, you are NOT alone.

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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
You make all these choices in opposition of what your inner knowing is telling you is true. Sometimes your inner? Knowing is like? No, you need to go. Take a nap. You don't need one more thing: you don't need to go to that work out class you dont need to frontier at the church, bake sale. You don't need to be mom, you don't need that you need rest. And you ignore that voice inside you that voice that comes from something greater than self you ignore it, because you think no I got I like, you know what matters more. What other people think of me, then what I know to be true, and I Don't want them to say that I'm lazy and I don't want them to say that I am not trying hard enough, and I don't want them to see so I'm in a go in opposition of what I know in my soul is the right thing for me. Hi, I'm Rachel Hollis, and this is my podcast I
spend so many hours of every single week reading and listened podcast and watching Youtube videos and trying to find out as much as I can about the world around me and that's what we do on this show we talk about everything life? and how to be an entrepreneur. What happened dinosaurs? What's the best recipe for fried chicken? What's the best plan for intermittent fasting? What's going on with our inner child house therapy working out for you, whatever it is, my guess or into I want to unpack it so that we can all understand these our conversations this is information for the curious. This is the Rachel Hollis I guess I guy high
hello? How is everyone welcome to another episode of Rachel Hollis Podcast, our thinking I like do remember. Maybe they still exist, but I honestly, I don't know who watches cable tv anymore besides, like my aunt under do you remember when shows like morning shows an inch as they had like a theme song remember. When Oprah had I mean it would change your theme song every few years, those of you who are old enough who were sort of Oprah babies like I was where you you know, came home after school and you watched an episode of Oprah. I was thinking about that yesterday. That, like these shows. You have been songs and many of them are still stuck in my head, even kind of obscure random daytime talk shows like I still to this day. I think this shows unfairly.
Two years there was a morning show called the MIKE and Molly show you guys. Remember I've first, there's no way. It's like I gotta, be the only person on the planet who remembers. MIKE and Molly show, but I remember their theme song, which was like in some morning and grab a cup of coffee. It's time to watch the MIKE and Molly show the my cat Molly show. I mean well. I'd like I can't remember important facts, but I can still remember theme songs from chosen like ninety ninety two and I would stay home sick from school The point is those like me to write myself a theme song sunset having any kind of intermodal, just be some fun dorky song that I wrote on a ukulele. in case you're, wondering I don't know how to play ukulele, but I would figure it out for this for something this important.
So welcome to another episode of the show. I love today's topic because it is a question I got from y'all or more specifically, this is a question I got from Stephanie in Ohio. She called into the hotline to ask this one and I always give people the option it says on the recording like It can tell us where you want us to play the your voicemail, which I love. So if you guys don't mind like, let me play the voicemail cause. I love. I think it's really powerful to hear your voices, but Stephanie said she didn't want her voice played. She just wanted. This question answered and it's a great question, so I want to dig into it today, which is how do you grow your intuition seventies. Like I she's, I'm trying really hard to listen to my God. like my inner knowing, but I feel like I'm constantly. Second guessing myself and I'm debating where I start a kind of
buyer allow in my head, because I think I'm making the wrong decision. She says how do I know the difference between. Like what's my guy and what's my head, which is great question. It's a really good question, especially because I have you ever listened to the interview I did with my friend Kimberly, so Kimberly Is someone that I was working with, who ended up becoming a friend of mine but she's, an energy healer, and hopefully guys have listened to that episode? If not go back and check it out by Kim. Did this episode and then incredibly cause you guys are the best so Many listeners became clients of Kimberly's because she can do Her energy work from anywhere in the world she can do it on zoom women from all over the world started working with her, which is. Amazing and has been. credible and life changing for her and all the best ways, but one of the things she me she's a man. There is such a theme that I am seeing.
and the women who I'm I'm working with because of yours, Oh and I was like. Oh my gosh, do tell like tell me: what are you saying and cancer is there really are struggling with trusting themselves? there really having a hard time, trusting their got. Trusting intuition, trusting the connection to self all of it there really having a hard time- and I guess I want to start their because Stephanie from all oh. I want you to know that you're not alone. I think that were told that women, especially that we are supposed to have this deep, like we were born with it.
intuition that guides us, and that is one hundred percent, the truth you are supposed to have that. But it's not your fault that you don't most of us like most most most of us from the time we were little. Girls have been told that some one else knows best. We ve been told to trust a voice of authority over our own inner? Knowing right we grow up and, like daddy knows, fast or Mama knows best for the church knows best or anybody whose Older than Minos, best or teachers, or its very, rare that women especially are raised to understand their inner knowing and that they can trust that part of themselves. And you know I I love the remit endure. As for anybody,
he's on a spiritual journey and is trying to understand their spirituality and bigger ways, especially for those of you who grew up in the church or a very much inside the church. I think that there is this conflict, this unfair conflict. That happens where people can get their feathers ruffled. When we talk about this idea of trusting yourself, because so many people inside of faith are taught that God knows best and they're supposed to listen to God, but I dont think that there is a difference. But Ween that gut feeling? I think that is God there is a scripture in the Bible that says greater is he who is in you than he who is in the world? I believe that all these things are the same. I believe be still and know that I am to hear the still small voice inside you. That is something I've had, since I was a little
it too far down a rabbit hole with Ya'Ll, but that intuition? That is the voice of our creator. That is, It's all one and the same. My inner, knowing I think, comes from something much greater than me, but it is me because God is in US arms I buy, but I feel like some theologians are going to be like you. Have you know? That's okay, you don't have to vibe with exactly what I'm saying, but I personally don't think that there's any disconnect between like a listening to the voice of your creator. That is also in you. I think that they are one and the same and I think that the more aligned we are with her selves, the more or less
we are with the universe in creation in God and everything greater than us, and I really would caution you to challenge anyone who tells you that you can't trust yourself. Oh, I have to trust God will ok the problem The problem is not interesting God. The problem is that for so many of us, God is interpreted through the lens of a church, a pastor which is usually not Always, but usually is the voice of a man who maybe has absolutely no idea, what's going on in your life or someone stands on Thursday, if every Sunday and preachers to you and that sort of becomes the filter for what God is. I know there's a quote I dont know. Why can't find who said it? But there is a great quote: the lemon paraphrase right now, which essentially said
as that, when you make God a man, you make man, God meaning if every image that you ve been given throughout your wife is the image of God as a man which, like all respect so much respect, God is on: there's no gender to God. If you believe that the creators of the Heavens and the earth the most powerful, the all knowing the I am Vm Alf Andy Omega, that that is a gender. Something is wrong, it's why? When talking about God. I will use the pronoun her. I will you she, because it doesn't make a difference right. God is neither so Why? If it doesn't matter, then I'm gonna go ahead and say she and her, because why not. The reason that I'm starting here sure like wait, we're trying to figure out how to trust our intuition why're, you talk
about God and gender and all because there is a disconnect between women, believing that they have a right to trust themselves, because they have been taught to trust authority, that was man, so if men know best, if daddy knows best, if they know best, of course, it's hard for you to trust your own thoughts, your own words especially gap. Some of us had amazing parents incredible brings were giving guidance and wisdom and told that we had worth and value, but many of us did it mean, us we're, not told those things. We were told that little girl should be seen and not heard. We were taught that our values in the way that we looked, we were taught that to be worthy. We should be thin, we should be pretty. We should
He pleasing we should find a man who wanted to marry us. We should be a mother. All of those things are so twisted because they get put on us from the time that we were little. If you choose to marry a man, if you choose to have children, if future, that's incredible. But we can't make sweeping generalizations about every single woman or what it means to be a woman or how women show up and from that I am little were told and tat all of these things. They get us further and further away from ever asking the question about what we think. What do we think is right? What do we think is ass in this, doesn't just happen and religion or gender. This happens in the way that were taught to approach our bodies. Body image. I mean raise your hand if you grew up
And you had already tried some kind of diet by the time you were thirteen years old by thirteen years old. I already knew about all kinds of diet. I had already tried diet. I had done different things because I saw my moms and my aunt em my big sisters doing those as well right now, again think of diet, culture for a minute most women, at least here in the: U S are rays from a very early age to worship at the idol of tenderness,. it's a religion in this country. This pursuit of being thin being fair means you're pretty being then means you're, you are strong and smile and better than other people like it's crazy, and why thin that war attacks of chase
a certain body. Image comes ten thousand different messages that are all conflicting with each other about what it will take to be this ideal person right. Maybe you should do Kido. Maybe you should do Adkins, maybe should do South Beach or slim fast, or wait watchers or Sally Craig Sally, Crag, Jenny, Craig. There are so many different mixed messages. Carbs or bad carbs are good proteins. Good, don't have transferred. Will some fats could think of how many mixed messages you ve been given in a single category you have learned over and over and over that you can't be trusted. You can't be trusted with food. You can't be trusted with known. What's best for your spirituality, you can't be trusted with your body. You can't be trusted, you can't be trust
Did you know we don't always realise that physical symptoms, like headaches, teeth grinding and even issues with your stomach, can be indicators of stress and, let's not forget about doom scrolling or sleeping to let all sleeping too much under eating over eating. All of these things can be symptoms that you ve got some emotional stuff. You need to talk through. Stress shows up in our lives and all kinds of ways. That's why better help is customize online therapy that offers video phone and even live chat sessions with your therapists. So you can access help whenever you need it, it's much more affordable than in person therapy, and you can give it a try to see if online therapy can help lower your stress. This podcast is sponsored by better help and listeners, get tat
percent of their first month at better help, dot com, slash rise, that's b e t, t e r, H, e l, p, dot com, slash rise, there's so many things confusing you which, by the way, just to go off on a little tangent about this for a minute anything that is working that hard to confuse. You there's a reason, because, if you are confused, you will continue to spend money to try and solve the problem. Let me say it again for the people in the back. If you are confused about something, you will continue to spend money to try and figure out what the solution is to your problem, cause. God forbid. You should learn to trust yourself and your intuition when it comes to anything cause. Trusting yourself and intuition is not going to make anybody else more money,
if you dont trust yourself, if you feel confuse that's when you spend money to figure it out, that's why the diet industry is a o. My billions and billions and billions of dollars are spent every year by people who are confused and dont trust themselves, and so they look to experts right and there's nothing wrong with going out and finding information. The problem is that when that diet doesn't work, that book doesn't get you there. That exercise programme falls off, I'm just using health as one example in your life, but when it doesn't work, you don't blame the diet. You blame yourself, you ve just another piece of evidence to tell you why you can't be trusted so staff, it's no.
like it's. No wonder that when you make a decision that you believe it from your inner, knowing you second guess yourself and you confuse yourselves so much that you stop doing anything altogether and you stay stock. So this conversation today are some steps that I think that you, and take to get in closer alignment with that interval. the inner knowing and that you can learn to trust yourself, that you can learn to trust your gut and that because you know you can trust your gut. You'll understand when it's your truth and when it's just like your brain, your sort of lizard brain freaking out and telling you that you must be wrong
Okay, so that's the intention today, Woop fired up some morning, I'm already fired up. I wrote yesterday because I was prepping gosh. I got this far away. I was prepping for this yesterday and I wrote all sorts of ideas. But this morning I thought of one that I feel it supersedes the other five and I would like to start with this idea because It's a little bit off topic of intuition or trust it. Just let me let me set this up. I am very decisive me, your girlfriend rage so decide save meaning. I make a decision and I go, and I've been like that as long as I can remember- and I've been like that, because It took me a while to learn to trust my intuition, but I have always trusted that I would
got it out, no matter what it is. I think that one of the biggest fatal flaws for people in the world that keeps them stock that keeps them from achieving their goals and dreams is that they believe there is a perfect right answer. A perfect right road be exact that they should head and that, if only they can figure out what that is, then their life will work out. Ok- and I do not believe that so, let's just Arthur, I dont believe that there is a perfect answer. I dont believe that there is an exact road ahead. I believe, there's a direction
When I start out in that direction, no matter what I choose, no matter, what even when it's the perfect way, even when it is aligned for my greater good for my involvement as a human for me to achieve the dream that I have in mind. Even then, I'm gonna come up against obstacles, robes things that are hard, like that's gonna happen, no matter what people get stuck in analysis, paralysis where they are I was then because they're trying to analyze everything to see what the perfect solution is thinking that if they choose the perfect solution, then it won't be hard sister it is going to be hard, no matter what you do so stop Stayin here, just freaking do something I have salute faith that no matter what a figure it out right like you move to a city
You're, like I've always want to move to a new city, summoned a move to a new city. But oh my god. What? If this? What? If that? What if I don't make any friends what, if I hate it, what if the kids aid at what ok then move again like the guys it everything is not a zero sum game right like it doesn't mean that this is the right answer, and this is the wrong one. Everything can work out will work out so long as you believe. That's true everything's working for you. So if that's the case, even if you should have take a detour that didn't work, ok, cool this- we get really confused. I think about how much
I am. We have right what we think I got a hurry up. I gotta hustle. I gotta do this now and I I one hundred percent at this pre cove it. I didn't even realize that this was something I believed, and I did. I believed that I needed to push harder. I believed I needed to go faster. I believed that I would only have one shot at any of these things. I believed all sorts of stuff, and it's just not true by the grace of God, I will have you know. I hope I have sixty more years on this planet right and that's what I'm going to bet on. I'm not going to bet on the fact that I've got two weeks. I'm gonna bet on the fact that I have sixty years and if that's not the case, okay, but I guarantee those sixty years will be a lot less stress, because I think I've got a long runway.
I think I'm in this for the long game. I think that that means I can go slower. That means I can be grateful. That means I can be present with my children in this moment. Instead of believing that I got a hustle and roll and travel and do all these things and miss their childhood so that, like oh, will some day, I'll have enough money and we can really go on vacation or then we can really celebrate or then- and it's just I just don't believe it's true. I believe that life is long by the grace of God. We don't know, but by the grace of God, life will be long and if my life has long, that means I've got time. And frankly, if I'm wrong about this, if, if you know unbeknown to me, I've got two weeks left believing I'm gonna have a long good life is gonna. Make.
Whatever life is left so much better, and if I believe that I've got a long life, that means I don't have to carry stress or worry or fear about not moving fast enough. I can let go of any shouldst, a concept shooting all over myself. Why should do this, and I should do that, and I should have had this done by now right. You have to trust that, no matter what happens, you will figure it out, because your fear of getting it wrong is keeping you from doing anything. like the idea that staff that you would make a decision but leave it was gonna believe you were guided and that was your intuition and then talk yourself out of it. Oh no girl, once I make a decision boom done we're going. I dont debated or question at another. Second, you don't mind me of years ago, as just pop demand
Years ago I went to get a facial, and I was I was and my wedding. I was close to my wedding. As was years ago I was getting married. I was like twenty years old or something, and Oh man, ok, so I'm sitting in in this lobby waiting to get a facial and one of the magazines on the coffee table was a wedding magazine. An omelette. Oh cool, you know my weddings like a month away or something so I'm excited ominous and I'm flipping through and as I'm flipping do. This magazine I'm getting more and more depressed because I'm seeing in the magazine are the most gorgeous weddings and the coolest idea. And I'm like I wish it would have done the old thing at those viral. I like those cars better than my. There is, and I wish that I had and I'm like I'm spinning Now over all the things I wished, I would have pulled into my wedding, but now it's too late and
we learned a really important lifeless and which was like no you. You are looking outside yourself, your questioning decisions at made its only going to make you unhappy, is only going to make you anxious or on shore and co the flowers in matter anyway. Right not, says the side? Note none of the stuff that I was hoping for, that was going to be like the thing that made our wedding great none of thirty four mannered. This They made our wedding. Great was the stuff that I never even thought about, like our friends dancing all night, and you know, link it just all these great things that had nothing to do with the tiny details I was obsessing over, so Once I make a decision, I go and my trust starts with knowing that whatever happens, I'm in a figure it out and also believing that everything is happening for me. I believe that
I believe that everything is happening for me. I had a really interesting sort of grapple with, as I'm sure if youve hung out with me, you heard me talk about this a lot. This idea that I believe that life is happening for us and not to us, and because I have that believe I tend to spend a out of time, analyzing hard things that I've gone through and because I'm looking for the lesson and it's something that has served me really well- and I believe I am the woman- I am because of a willingness to like dig into the hard stuff and figure out why it happened or how I contributed to it and one recently. I can talk about this better now, but I did an episode in I think January, which you could go back and listen to about losing art. I keep trying to not say that and I don't like the term losing my baby, because I didn't lose her. She wasn't like leave her somewhere, but I was pregnant
and my baby died, and you know that happened in December and it's the end of March and I still have really been having a hard time I'm not a hard time in that sought affecting all day every day, but I'm still really grieving that loss and morning it very deeply and really trying to have just spent months and months. China understand why. Why did this happen why why why? Because, wasn't planning on it and because I got pregnant while using birth control. For the second time in my life, I. Thought. That may be. That meant that, like God, why
I wanted that baby to be her here or that the universe had a plan that I didn't understand. I I don't want more children and didn't want more children. I have four kids and I'm great- and it's also a lot I'm sorry. I didn't have any plans to have more kids and then, when that happened, I was like all my work. Maybe I dont understand and so happen and it was hard to grapple with, but then I really quickly got so excited because I thought oh well. Ok, the universe always knows better than I do so I'm going to trust this, and then I got excited- and so when I have told the story before, but I went in to the doktor for routine ultra sound and the baby didn't have a heartbeat anymore. I couldn't I just couldn't
stand it and I'm proud of my socks. I feel, like I've done a lot of work to even be able to talk to you guys about this without crying, but I was I and the other day I was crying about it and I was crying to my boyfriend and was a baby. Why do you? Why do you feel like you keep needing to like like stick this? and an impact from every angle, and I was like because I just want to know why. I want to know why I want to know why. Why did this happen? I don't understand why, and I feel like if I could, just if just unpacking enough, then I would understand- and he was like some times. Shitty things just happen. Sometimes just that- and there isn't- there isn't gonna- be a great. Why an it
first time that I have really taken that to heart that I understand that some time shitty stuff just happens and that how something can be found, were you is how your shaped by the process and who you become through the process, but it doesn't always have to be a lesson that you're learning, and so I have trust in myself, and I have trust and God that I am being shaped and formed into the person that I'm supposed to be and that I will figure it out, no matter what happens and the trust starts there you're not going to be able to trust yourself in a decision that you have to make or trust yourself too, like listen to your inner, knowing if you can't start with that truth,.
Then, no matter what happens, you will be ok, that no matter what happens you are on the path and that no matter what happens you'll figure it out. Now, here's some more tactical advice, some things that are a bit less nebulous and a bit more like do this thing to make your tuition stronger. The first thing is The first thing I wrote down is inner, knowing so how I thought to describe this was the difference between feeling something and thinking something feeling something and thinking something so your inner, knowing I believe, is always always always trying to talk to you, but there is a solid chance if you feel it out of touch with your intuition that you have ignored her so many times views.
After down that you've blocked her out that you've numbed her with food or alcohol or pills or drugs or sex, or or whatever that she's it's like a little kid that's been told us up so many times that they just stop trying to talk so part of this is that you need to get quiet and feel so meditation is really great for this prayer, is really great for this, understanding kind of how your body I'm going to meditates bass, amusing air quotes if you're not watching this Youtube. I say meditates because there are different types of meditation for me, so I If I am trying to real get in touch with my what I'm thing and feeling on the inside and what I believe I'm being guided to do, I believe in guides and angels and curing the voice of my crew.
And if I want to do that, I have to get quiet. So how I personally do that is, I will put on meditation music I can grab that on Spotify. You can tell your Alexa app, like I literally tell her every morning, Alexa play meditation music. She is, will have a playlist ready to go for you and I'll just sit and get quiet and focus on my leaving? I dont think that I'm a very good I'm I'm not like up meditate her. I don't know like in others. Teachers like you could engage had he will too you had a Mediterranean he'll. Do it in a very in the proper way. I can't quiet mine for twenty minutes at a time or some like two hour. I can't I'm so I just focus on breathing and when I am I close my eyes folks, some breathing and I try. I take this for what it's worth, but I try and my third, I shot grass. If you know much much about chalk, raising the yogurt tradition,
between your eyebrows. A little bit above would be your third I. So I closed my eyes and I just try and focus on that spy. One, I guess it would be great as energetically your opening up your third I but there's something about for me. If I'm, if I'm I of this, sounds weird, but eyes are closed and I'm tryin to still focus on something I'm less likely to get distracted. But I get distracted if my mind one starts to wander and I'm like. Oh, I need to get bread for the kids. Sandwiches for lunch is soon. I notice that I just come back to trying to focus on that spot again. I don't get angry at me. Itself, I don't get mad, I'm really gentle with you know my mind hence to wander in, that's ok, but I'm just trying to sit and be still so I, my favorite scriptures, is be still and know that I am, and I feel like in that moment you can't listen to the voice of. I am unless you.
are practising it, which is something I really want. You guys to hear. Like start with two minutes, do two minutes of breathing eyes closed, focused quietness, fur two weeks and then do three minutes and then do for an you build up like anything else. This is a practice. It's not something that will immediately come to use spent you no forty, six, years. Ignoring this thing, it's gonna take more than three sessions to try and feel comfortable getting it back so meditation is really helpful. And really pay attention to. Is this a thought I'm having or feeling that I'm having great way to look at this is my favorite question to ask friends or sometimes podcast guess when they're talking about thing that went really horribly wrong. A relationship where the person turned out to be someone totally different than they thought or a business part
who went rogue or a situation that what really badly my favorite question to ask is: what's the first red flag that you ignored because I found in my own life and when I challenge people this question- that everybody He has a moment where they knew they had their inner knowing they had a feeling in their got. That was like this is wrong, so a power for question is like. Can you find it I'm in your life, where you knew and you ignored it- that's number one cause of what I would actually says. You probably can find a hundred situations in your life, where you knew you had a feeling, but you ignored it and two. If you can even do a little bit of more deep, diving and ask yourself, why did you ignore it? I think I've told you all this story before, but I have a a very dear friend who had a project huge project. Very successful project
public a celebrity thing and publicly it was like. Oh my gosh she's living the best live and private Lee. It was hell private. We, the business partner who was helping her to bring this thing to fruition, was so wrong and again publicly. It's like the fame, the fortune, all of it's happening privately, it was miserable and she was telling the story and I was like: when did you have the first rightful? AG about this business partner, because there is no way that you got through this whole process and suddenly everything changed and she was like honestly, I knew at the first meeting I knew at the first meeting, I'm like okay, why did you ignore it and she said because the opportunity was so big and I was so excited, and I told myself where I believe the idea that, if I didn't do with this person, I would never have the opportunity so
ie ego and her fear and her scarcity mindset made heard, do something that later ended up being a bit of a nightmare, and you could say like ass. You got money and yeah. She got celebrity, but I, she's. My friends, I know the hell that she lived through for three years and it will and at all what it could have been an it wasn't the final product wasn't what she would have hoped and all of these things went wrong like really bad, like legally, who just absolute crap behind the scenes public to never know. But had she trusted her intuition about this business partner. I believe she would have been better set up. I believe the universe had something better and store, but she ignored it. So if you can go back look and say: ok, when was I feeling something
and my brain talked me out of it. My rational brain talked me out of it and I ignored when I was feeling I have this happen all the time and I enjoy the crap out of my t, like a big fancy agents, and you know for all the things, because that's what happens, I you know agents who work on the pod Cason agents who work on my books and agents who work on movie stuff, and you know Sunday when it finish the added on this screenplay, you'll, understand and talking about, but I will not work with people that I have there's just a bad vibes and it's crazy because sometimes Is it really important partners and I've done this, past, where I was so, sided about people, my industry and getting to club with them and getting to do things and then, when I got to know them, I realize like this is a bad something's wrong.
I can't tell you what it is, but I just know in my heart that I dont want to be around this energy and I don't and I walked away from so much money and so many opportunities, because I just might my intuition tells me that this is not the right thing to do, and I ass? I won't. I would literally rather go work at a coffee shop with good awesome. Humans then make a movie with a bunch of do. bags. I really would become. I believe that the opportunity to make a movie with awesome humans will show up eventually, but I think that that intuition is my inner. Knowing saying this is not the right path for you and that's a that's a personal value for me right, It doesn't have to be the same for you, but not one of my mottoes is. I want to make cool shit with cool people. That became my
Otto after years of making cool shit with people who work great, an absolutely having the thing I was making be destroyed by like either because I was inside of a situation where it became so bad. I don't even want to work on the project anymore or because maybe Project was cool, but behind the scenes it was just like a crap show yeah. I don't know I'm,
I've really listened to my gut, and I think that if you're not used to doing that that, if you go back historically and just sort of take some time and think about what were people in your life, that turned out to be not at all who you thought they were or what were experiences that turned out not at all like they turned out so badly like think of those times and think did I ever sense it beforehand. There's a an old book by Gavin De Becker called the gift of fear. I remember watching him on Oprah years ago and he says in that book that humans, The only animal that will sense fear or will sense that some things off and walk toward it anyway and women do this all the time because they don't want to be in polite.
They don't want to be seen as route. They dont want to be too loud. They don't want people who think that their bitches they do all of these things they like You know your mother in law thinks that you're supposed to do saying you do it, because you don't want anyone to think that, like you're, not a team player, you're not dedicated you're, not whatever you make all of these choices in opposition your inner. Knowing is telling you is true. Sometimes Inner, knowing is like no badge you need to go, take a nap you don't need to do one more thing. You don't need to go to that work out class. You dont need to volunteer at the church, bake sale, you don't need to be. mom you don't need that. You need rest. And you ignore that voice inside you that voice that comes from something greater than, self. You ignore it because you think no, I got I you know. It matters more. What other people think of me, then what I know to be true
I don't want them to say that I'm lazy and I don't want them to say that I am not trying hard enough. I don't want them to see. That's what I'm gonna go in. Opposition of what I know in my soul is the right thing. For me, the other flip side is really powerful. Is my favorite things to meditate on is to think of something that has happened that just absolutely turn out so much. better than you thought like it just ended up being this miracle. This amazing thing and when you look back, you can see that it was divine Providence. You can see that you were guided because I dont it's possible to be led into something divine into thing that the universe has for you. If you are on some level in touch with an inner knowing, even if it is the smallest tiniest bit. So if you can do something, patients on ok went to go really right when we're times.
I listen to my got, even if it was a bit unconventional and it worked out really well right. I think about this. With my boyfriend, like the love like I'm being such a gate and, if you're listening to this and that are watching on Youtube, you don't seem, like blushing and being a geek, but like I opened an he's out of town for work for like a week, and I opened a book my book that I'm currently meeting- I opened it and there was a note tucked inside this morning, and it was the most beautiful amazing poetic Sweet no and the thing was when I got in bed last night, there was the most amazing no tucked under my pillow. and what I know, because he does this whenever he goes out of town. Is that I'm innocent
Can you to find those notes? Hidden all around the house- and this was a friend amusing airports- is a friend I met for costs. a little over a year ago. This random thing I had three different people tell me about this app three different people? Whenever I hear something three times, I always think that the universe is guiding me, but three separate people tell me about this app. That was, for people at higher profile jobs. So it wouldn't maybe be that easy to. Like me, new friends or meat, like you, you know just going on Instagram and me like hey you wanna, go me me for coffee, but that you could find people sitting in your industry or who'd beak oh, I don't know so I got on this axis. Three different people told me about it. Now is China just silly, and I thought it was kind of fun, but I had in mind. Anybody and then it all,
I look back now and I'm like every single step was guided this. You know it this guy that I connected with, and he has he had and has a very cool job. So I was like well that's a cool job and baby called. I connect to a summit of the music industry like what's that all about, and we like next it on the app- and I remember it was during this like crazy snow storm that Austin had and he like oh, my like he needed to Africa. why, but he couldn't be on the app anymore. So he was like just texts me. It's easier to text me and I had had all kinds of creeper guys be like. Let me remember, let me and all of them. I can't my number get away from me and this random guy that I had just connected where he was like my number, like just text me and for some reason. I was like TAT. I can text him I text him and then we were just literally from
It's like we're trading like oh here's, the book I'm reading and whatever, and then we finally met for coffee and then we just were like friends who had coffee and it just grew and every part of that was guided every part I can't like we even believe they have a sweet friend who again that unbelieving accidents, I was on a business trip and one of my friends that I haven't seen you know we tax each other all the time, but we live in different places and neither of us live in the city that we were in for work and she walked into where I was and a jumped up. I gave her a big hug was so excited to see her and she just like word vomited. She was like I'm getting a divorce and nobody knows- and I was like oh like come in, come in here for the real thing, and I ended up being having the beautiful opportunity to
hold space for her in that, and I dont believe that that was an accident at all. Both of us were guided to be there that day, so that we can have a conversation and I just I really listen I'm always listening and there's a bit of Whimsie and listen to those the voices Emma leaving that its guiding you to something better, what did the story about running a marathon a month? A guy wasn't supposed to run a marathon. I missed my yoga class, and was like. Oh, I miss my class cause. I'm I'm supposed to be doing something else. I just had this feeling of supposed to be doing something else and when I went to go, get the movie. I saw For the marathon and ended up job, Being into the marathon last minute and having one of the most profound experiences of my life were constantly being guided, but you have to
trust and one of the ways that you can trust is to look at historically, when this has worked for use that when you get a similar feeling in the future, you're gonna trust it. I wrote a note here too about listening to your body, Europe, body will warn you. Before your mind will ever catch up, and so I'm. Your mind actually won't catch up, so pay it, into what is your body language when you meet someone right like sometimes no basin. However, you fill in your meeting. New people or you're around new experiences, sometimes will be close off right. Like your body languages, your arms are full dangers, shoulders, HANS, you're feeling a need to to be protective, because maybe that's just energy. You get a little nervous around new people, but also our
bodies will naturally respond to a situation that we dont trust. We don't trust that person. We don't have experience or even your body is telling you that there's this idea, this decision, this dream, this path, that you're trying to chase that there's something That's not right! There is a really interesting stuff that you can research, I'm some people. This is going to sound railway world. This is your will. I should have let go of eye sound that plays a cruiser whew moment, but there's lots of people that work with a pendulum which is, This idea that your body always knows the truth. You can research can easy ology, which is muscle testing in the body and there's a ton of research on muscle testing, and so
with your body, knowing what's right and what's wrong, I can't it's hard to show you right now, but just google it if this is interesting to at all, but even teach my kids to do this. So if you study you study kinesiology, there's diffrent am oh gosh. I am I'm not We go down this rabbit hole it's too long. It will take too long to explain, but I bet you could go on Youtube and look up videos, but essentially muscle testing is and when we're trying to make a decision is that your body knows the answer and that essentially, like your muscles, get weaker when there's the reaction, like your body, having a reaction to something? So you can't see me doing this right now, but I am essentially hold a vote. If you're on Youtube, you can see it, but if you're listening in podcast, I apologize. If this doesn't make it
in a sense. But imagining imagine I'm holding my index finger my thumb together in a circle and I'm taking Mather index finger and should have like pushing it against my my fingers are closed, but not really hard em and if you listen to my episode with Kimberly. This is how she does her energy workers he's going through your body and she's doing mess. Something is a yes for her. Her fingers stay calm, someone something's and know the muscle gives way. If you ever worked with, I can etiology you'll, you sometimes a doctor. Well, well go through and of test of your organs by you have one hand that's raised and then their touching, like your spleen, your stomach. whenever and win and areas weak. It's so crazy, like your eye,. loses all of its muscle power. I like what I'm saying makes no sense. Please go
go it. I swear. If you can watch it you'll understand. There's lots of people in a spiritual practice will use the pendulums literally veld, dangle something from their fingers and they ask their body what is a yes or they asked the pendulum. What is the yes? It's your body, because Was it guys? This is the part where Rachel goes off cause it's very hard to explain. It could take a whole episode about it in fact call the hotline. If you have questions the hotline is seven three, seven, four hundred four six, two six, you can call and be like bitch. We don't know talking about. Please explain that more, but you could do with a pendulum. Sleep dangling attain from your fingers and the pendulum will move in a certain direction. If the answer is yes and a different direction of answers know another way that I learned this. This is more of a chinese theology thing was to stand upright, like sand with your feet on the ground. Close your eyes, hands at your side and ask your body: ask your inner no interest in your head. What is a yes,
Then you do this a few times and when I do it, my yes is that my body sways forward a bed, and I were somebody. What's a no and my body sways backwards, she would do the same thing with the pendulum to what's. He asked what are now and you're not moving her hand, but the pendulum will start to swing, and it's because you are affecting energetically your effect. In what your inner knowing knows. The answer is, and you can testify can you get my wearing black sure, an ill it it's while what I'm saying what I know the reason, but I am going off on this tangent- is because, if you feel like you are out of touch with your body, which many many people are many of us are disconnected from our bodies after a lifetime of feeling, shame body image issues and being told that were wrong and other indifferent, and so are you ve lost that connection.
A pendulum or muscle testing can easy ology or I'm innocent of the swaying back and forth. Can be a really powerful way to get in touch with what your body is feeling of the very long winded explanation, but it's a really powerful tool when it comes to intuition the next thing that I wanted to advise on this one was to practice. reading energy to practice. Reading in energy, because this again ghosts, the idea that Europe enter knowing? I think all he's knows if a situation, a decision, a person is right for you or not and I would suggest
in closing your eyes and thinking like clear your mind and then think of friends right, like think of your best friend, and was the first word, the pops up. Think of your partner with the first word that pops up think of a child. What's the first word, the pops up, your boss,. keep doing this, because that clear minds first word that comes up if you are in touch with your intuition, is also a is a very clear indicator. It's like reading someone's aura so I dont know a ton. I actually wish I knew more about or us, but I could how you that I will meet someone. And, unlike if I should have close my eyes and try again. Focusing on their energy, or even like my best friends, are kind of get a feeling like a man, their energies that really murky. Today there is like it's like a murky brownish.
I like something- and I dont know what that means, but I know that that's very front in their normal, like bright, sunny, yellow, happy light, and I guess what This is just the idea of of trusting yourself because. I dont know if anything that I've told you will track with someone who's deep intuitive and like has been practising this for fifty years and is a site Or a medium, and they have like a whole set of tools and they ve gone two classes. I'm I don't know of any thing I've said- will track with what other people believe about intuition. I'm telling you what I know works for me. So maybe when I just said that my and always has bright, sunny, yellow energy and then, when she was going through hard season, she had like dark green murky brown. maybe there's someone is like oh dude, yeah or as meanness and the yellow me
This in the Green means S and that's why you're reading those things or maybe people- I beg you, don't know what you're talking about, but guess what I'm not worried about it, because this is a whole. I interpret it to me and I think that that's what matters most is I can tell you how I get in touch with my intuition, and the internet can tell you all sorts of ideas about how to get in touch with intuition. But what's gonna matter most is that you develop a practice where you feel connected. That's what's gonna matter most. and that you trust if Europe oh, you know out when I think of people I dont get words or colors. I get sounds I get music that you trust that that's The way that you're internal self works yeah it's about intuition, but Stephanie from Ohio. it's about learning to trust it more than ever there so
many things bombarding us and making us believe that we can't be trusted. Right, like were learning to trust ourselves less and less, and this this idea of connecting again with your inner self. It's like an act of defiance. It's an act of rebellion- To say, yeah, I'm gonna take in that's incredible wisdom from this person in man. The pastor had a really good advice. This topic in. That teacher told me this. I was so good, but I have to take all this inside of me and understand. What's gonna work best for me, and that is a practice that will last your whole life. So I hope that that was really helpful guys. I hope you got something out of our conversation today. If you d get wherever getting this, if it's on podcast are you to please subscribe, really appreciate you subscribing to the show
and if you found this helpful, we share it. You made this long, you made a past and our families than I think might have been good fingers crossed share with a friend. Shared on your social, tell people what's up, I always think that one of the greatest ways that we can be leaders to our common, Nidhi is by when, when something is really helpful to us, we share it with others. If you have a question like Stephanie in Ohio, make sure that you call into the hotline the number one more time it's written on my wall, seven, three, seven, four hundred four, six, two six! You can call and ask me a question And I will turn it into an episode of the show and you have the right to say you know you don't want your your voice to be used, but I really love it when you guys, let that happen, I think it so much core, but
I see you next time. I am Rachel Hollis and glad to be here on this journey with you and if nobody's told you this lately and want you to hear from me, I love you and I'm rooting for you. The Rachel Hollis podcast is produced by me. Joe Hollis, its edited by Andrew Weller and Jack, noble.
Transcript generated on 2022-05-18.