You are now listening to a special bonus episode of the Rachel Hollis Podcast for the limited series side by side with: U S, bank? U S, bank we'll get there today.

Welcome to a special bonus episode for side by side with: U S, bank limited series of collaboration with my show and others will talk about the gaps that exist socially, economically and financially and how they differ based on class race and gender. I was so excited about this project for a lot of reasons. I feel it is such an important conversation to be happening, and I love this mash up between this huge corporation and media. How do we tell butter stories and how do we get those stories out into the world in a smarter way and its awesome that they're, having tough conversations like this one so publicly? So we can all listen and learn from each other. You can follow or subscribed to the series wherever you listen,

searching side by side with: U S, bank or visit side by side with? U S, bank dark, come now. Let's dig in? U S. Bank will get there together a couple of weeks ago, in partnership with side by side with U S, bank. I put out a call on my instagram for your questions on career advancement. building a business juggling work and motherhood Annie all any thing in between. We got hundreds of responses from women and every kind of situation you can imagine from just getting started in your career, to how to deal with mommy guilt when your high achiever to help me answer some of these questions, I brought in an expert specifically Kate Quinn if administrative officer, U S bank, who has worked in base equally, every field you can imagine and her prolific career. So without further ado. Here's my culinary all about women in business with Kate Quinn

I I'm Rachel Hollis. And this is my podcast- I spent so many hours of every single week, reading and listened podcast and watching Youtube videos and trying to find out as much as I can about the world around me and that's what we do on their show. We talk about everything Life and how to be an entrepreneur. What happened dinosaurs? What's the best recipe for fried chicken? What's the best plan four intermittent fasting: what's going on with our inner child house therapy working out for whatever it is. My guess are into. I want unpacking so that we can all understand these. Conversations. This is information for the curious. This is the Rachel Hollis,

I'd CAS came first of all, thank you so much for taking the time to sit with me. An answer be my pleasure. Before we jump, then I will love if you don't mind giving listeners a background and your career, because they think it so interesting and so point yet for the conversation that we're gonna have sure you know. Somebody once said to me that a career is a marathon and not a spreads, and I would say that is definitely been the case for me. I started actual in California. In Hollywood, I've worked in writing. I work in a fair manner. They believe it or not- and I am now a banker so here figure out how I got rid of point. They are you than I, but I just kind of followed the road and kept taking opportune

these are now I run most corporate functions strategy, digital transformation, at: U S back and having a great time. And I feel like I want to make sure can't do that you have navigated square while raising children, as is right. Yes, I have I have three boys. I have a twenty two year old, I have a seventeen year old son and I haven't eleven year old son and I wait you ought to have an eleven year old, but I have one ok. Well, let's, let's just maybe these questions we play a prompt up on and surrounding this was questions got directly from the community that I'd love to dig into with you and get your perspective on. Let's start with a leadership, so one of the questions that we got said, I never really considered myself a reader. How do you know if you are one? What do you think rocket?

Well, that's a great question. I've never really thought about that and I suppose the most literal if people follow you than Euro leader, even if your mom and your kids are following you in doing it, say you're, a leader, I think of your friends are asking you for it. You're a leader I think nobody has elements of leadership within now. I'd told We agree, I would also say to think of it in terms of and I don't mean employment, social media world- I mean if you have influence over people in your committee, your friends, your family members, Then you have an opportunity to step up into leadership, so I think I must especially when I get this kind of question from woman or a girl? I might yes, you are a leader, absolutely you are a leader, and so it's not a question I think of whether or not you are one it's accepting that

but that is something that is true for you and then asking yourself. How is that something to call today in your life? So would you a little bit about how you ve grown as a leader over the course of your career I mean- and I agree with you Rachel. I think most women and I hope, changing, but I think especially for me growing up, I mean nobody ever told you. You were a weaker, as but like in fact the opposite right. You were not expected to be a leader I remember many times trying to lead and being told hey, but are not do that anymore right, so I do think that everybody does. Habit inside of them, for me. I think it was on I was motivated to actually achieve for me I overcame, I had I had so many confidence issues to be honest with you that I overcame just because I kept

to achieve and kept trying to achieve, and it just cannot lead me to a place where I a cheap, because I just kept trying I will end and what was it like for you, because you ve come up in more than one industry, that's dominated by men, So you know how have you navigated worlds where it is somehow the boys club and you're working to be a leader in your working to evolve your working to achieve when you're coming up again. Things that maybe don't always set us up for success as women in business yeah- I'm I agree with your night, certainly over the past few years, especially of how this conversation I myself over and over again looking back, I think you know what could I have done differently? What should I have done differently? I wish I would have stood up for other women more than I did maybe early in my career. I just think that it has been a different road for women.

Superman? Certainly in my industries I think in any industry- and I do think it's changing, but I still think that way. I think my humour was something that I used to help people get the message, but without being so in a point about eight or direct I remember making it once in a executive meeting that it felt like a robber, Palmer video. And I remember I remember the only other woman in the room. Coming to me afterwards and saying that was awesome, everybody got your point, but there were laughing instead of feeling badly about it, but you major point so I you think, I'd think about communicating in a way that tat you get your point across, but you don't have to be. mean about it. You can be constructed and humorous and really make the point that's so good- and I think you Know-

I wanna like wave a magic wand and sort of say that, like it is still the case, but it is in a lot of cases it still it still more difficult for women to climb up the ladder. It's worse still, my getting paid equal to men there's all sorts of things that exist, especially in the corporate world, and I think the honest to God advice. I would give a young woman even if it's not like the most sort of magic answer is. I think that something you have to like, I feel like I came up in my career and I had to be better than the men in order to move up. It isn't enough to be asked good! You had to be better. You had to be excellent, and now Everybody wants to hustler set up, you know like I wanted to when I was younger, but I do think that you get to a place where you

worked really hard and you ve navigated well, and then you get to start like it's almost like you play by the rules and so get to make your own and their there comes a time in your career, where you do have more influence you have like you, you're able to use your waste in a different way, you're able to turn around and help other women come up, you're able to raise your hands and point out the disparity, and so I guess what I would say to people who are in it right now and feel like it's. A flag is just breaking keep going, because we need more women sitting around the boar table. You know in the board room, we need more women at the top and it looks like you saying strong and keep moving forward in order to accomplish that. I think a spot on, and I agree with you, I wish it were different, but I think you just keep going you pay one foot in front of the other. You dont want anybody, take away your voice, your power, you're gonna have money.

that's where he just feel awful and you just keep going, he just keep going join us to hear more conversations like this by following or subscribing to side by side with: U S, bank limited series they parted up with some really amazing shows to discuss racial wealth gaps, financial literacy and more because I gotta say one of the cruellest things about: U S: Bank, on their approach to quality that I learned while recording this was a willingness to have hard conversations about what it looks like for women to come up inside of their organization and inside of all of corporate Amerika. You can follow or subscribed to the series, wherever you listen by searching side by side with: U S, bank or visit side by side with: U S, bank dot com,

Now, let's get back to our conversation with Kate, to answer more of your questions about work and the gender gap, U S bank will get there together, You were encountered. Imposture syndrome like you, ve ever been in situations in your career, where your like, I'm here, and I have this job, but what the heck, like everyone gonna throughout that I don't know what I'd do yeah I mean I in all honesty. Don't you think everybody feels that way at some point? Yes, so the thing I really am dislike about. You know I've been sitting on his panels for so long and women always say like you can have it all, and I remember feeling like inside, like you can like. I'm doing something wrong, because I do not feel like. I have at all. What am I doing wrong and I read the impasse: ask your syndrome is the same thing like. I think we all feel just like messy

right, it's messy and we don't always feel confident. We don't always guess what we don't always know what we're doing for real, like it's, not even imposter syndrome. Sometimes I'm going. I don't know how to do that I need you, just do it right. There is this that says, I'm enough for sure butcher the percentages, but it something like if a man Caesar like job posting, and he is seventy percent fight or maybe even less it might even be lessened seventy percent. He will apply for a job statistically. If a woman sees a job hosting? She believes that she has to be one hundred percent, all a fight for the job that she is applying for she want apply and what that means is very few. Women get the opportunity to sort of step in to bigger role,

These are kind of you know it take a big shot because their only asking for things that they feel like they are completely able to handle and that their resume can prove that. So I feel like that is something to were like the dude like Burgess. They don't care there, an impostor, they're gonna, try they're, going to trust themselves to figure it out, and I guess, if your listening to this, I would really encourage you to book we even what your capable of. I really think that sometimes you got for yourself into the deep into the pool and that's when you learn how to swim but you're in ever gonna know if new, don't call the shots and aim for something bigger than you doing today. totally agree with you and by the way does anybody know how to be a law when they first have a baby now honour. I write you re figure that out, like you, figure anything else out right, there's nothing with bigger stakes: the mad YAP hundred percent. I'm curious dinner. We're talking about this. You know that

the difference between being a man of business and me a woman in business and I'd be to recycle. How have you navigated using her voice, meaning either in speaking to your teams from speaking confidently about what you are building, what you're doing away you're going or be, in a room like you talked about where you are trying to. You know find maybe the courage you're to this me. Their people rely man. I want to be able to say to speak up to offer ideas into this storm, but I'm having a hard time figuring out how to find that confidence so one thing one track I learned early on was suppose your file as a question, because it's easier on you, I knew you'd, probably have to have a little bit less confidence to do it. So, instead of like making a point about them you say: have you ever thought of their sore? I wonder if we did it this way, and I am not suggesting that that's the right thing, but I do

it's easier to get your voice in that way, and I will tell you that if we cannot go back to humor. I think humorous, like your sick, can be your secret weapon cause I cannot tell you how many times still I sit around the table and I'll say some. and then a man around the table will see the exact same thing? Why but now, instead of being quite about it, I got to the person next beat. Did you this year that the night sitting on a few minutes ago? I often it so I dont care anymore I'll, say that just to make a point yeah! No that forget, I remember a really good bit of advice, a guy at the beginning of my career, someone said I want you to Imagine that everybody sitting in the tea meeting everybody gathered around the table. I want you to imagine like a poker game and how, for, however, long you been in your career. However, like whenever tenure, you have our experience, you have the longer you and the more poker chips you have. But you

Oh your brand new, you have one poker chip and when you lose that poker chip, it's gone and so they said. I want you to imagine every time you come to the city of one poker check and because you only have one you want to be really intentional. You absolutely want to use it in the game or its worth nothing, but you want to be really intentional about when you speak up and how and that helped me as someone who, like I'm, probably tackled too and probably offer my opinion are to operate without people soliciting, especially when I was younger. That really helped me to sit and think. Like me, rage if you only get one chance to speak up or or add to this, conversation. You want to make sure that your doing I answered the you really, but Van and that you know really well and I feel like that. Helped me alive to come across as a lot more proof rational than I was at the time. I think that's great advice. I gave you

They too is pay attention, like them. Some leaders that year, if you're in a meeting, some leaders actually want everybody to speak up, and I think Can men are better at this traditionally than women are sold me they do value volume value and devalue volume, even if you don't have much to say. I think your silent in a meeting with a leader like that you're gonna be notice because you're not participating, so I think, noticing if that's the kind of leader with make sure to say something- maybe half a poker check Hughes but but think other leaders will value exactly that. You know really good, choosing my words carefully using a proper job. Well, but I do think it you have to pay attention to the circumstance is that your ran in order to make sure that you're viewed. right way by that leader. I will also say you need to really think about what is the unique skill or perspective that you are bringing to.

Table and really mean to that, because like I remember one of the time that I am press like four bosses simultaneously them ass, I was I mean I was maybe twenty and I saw these executive sending in an office trying to figure out a function on the computer and they just did not know how to do it. people were ten levels above where I was, but I knew how to do the things when I was younger, I knew how to use a computer better, and so I am in this was ages ago right when I was still like, they were all came a key there alone and I walked by, and I was like. Oh excuse me actually you know and I walked over in literally thirty seconds. I did the thing that they needed done. They were like little, but that was it like. I think that you have to win into the things that you

no well? I couldn't have advised those people and had a like put the budget sheet together, but I certainly had now and was able to offer- and that was that was sort of the beginning of me. Cut opening. Like look, I don't know everything, but there are some things that I have expertise on and if there is an opportunity for me to use that I really want to leave into it. I think that's great, I think you know one of the mistakes that I see. People make the most as they say. You know that they say basically hey. I need a job, I can do anything. I can do anything and I would say that's the worst thing to do its job. First thing to put on your bio make sure to your point. Exactly the people know Exactly what you are. Are you a dog or your cat or your coyote or your bare, because don't make people man and use their brain to figure out what you are. You figure it out for them and that will definitely do you alive. more than

being a general, was there anything even that there really good practice, especially I mean this is for anybody, but it let's leave your younger. I think it would be a really good practice before even start applying before you start thinking What were you going to do for you to take that time to set the end additionality and understand, but what does that? What's that Brazil, I'm hoping for like what is this? What like you said a man, Ionia my a bear, my dog, my affairs like how do you want to navigate up through this? I I know that my career has ship and changed a million times and ways I couldn't have anticipated, but I think that the thought line for me has always remained the same. I am communicator, I was a communicator back when I was blogging about casserole recipes and later when I was writing fiction books and became a speaker like going. All the way back. That's been my through line, and I think I could navigate a lot of roles as law. As I keep what's like what is your unique skill set that,

really are great out, and I I it's exactly what you said. People and I get your bills to pay, but- you can pay bills a lot of ways so, just taking even enough, any kind of sitting down with a journal and really digging into who am I? What am I a greater? What am I tried to build can really be a smart start to navigating what comes next, I agree. I think a lot of people dont know what their special thing is, I tell a lot of the women that I meant for to go and ask the people arrive. Do your family, your friends, your colleagues, the asked them to give three attributes that describe you three adjectives, tributes, and then you start to hear that from people, and you start to a picture of kind of your unique you evolves because I do think Why do people don't even know what makes some special now that rail had a fight like the inner critic? Any end

how do you like you had the audacity to say this is what makes me special. This is what I think, I'm great at my friends told me these three attributes, but how do you find that negative self talk that tries to make you feel and secure and lose confidence, so I've done everything from hanging in a positive posted notes on the mirror. When I was young, I did us too You know you knew all the things like cancel out the tape, all you visual imagery? And now you know every time. I just hear that boys. I just try to turn to like how would you want your friend to title? I just on a train my inner salted. You know somebody once said every person five year old in mind right I mean we all are five years old inside, like those little kid voices. For good and bad, and I you know I just try to nurture the good part about, and

yourself mom in a good way away. I want my mom to beat me Ray. I also think that when I'm, when I have the negative self tat going on, I am thinking in the past, so my negative self talk always comes from me, pulling something you Do you like an anxious, stop pulling something from my past and saying this is going to happen again, you're going to mess this up, you're not going to get this right! They'll never won this idea, like all that it's always passed and if I can ask myself: okay RU past present or future thought process I mean. Ideally, we all want to be very present in where we are today but the queen. This way that I know of have to get out of negative self talker worrier anxiousness about something I'm working on is to push my thought process into the future. So and am going. Oh, my god, what happened? You know if this doesn't work out or fails. I immediately go into what's gonna look like when it succeeds. What's it going

you're like when I walk in the door the first day when I get this new job like I go into that, because that will give me an emotional response, it really positive, and had a pull me out of that negative thinking. I think that's tat. We re me. I were kind of saying the same thing right. You have to imagine roused to visualize the good because thoughts of Power- and if you can you can make turn the negatives and positives and imagine the good, then the goodwill Moreover, in my let's get him to tactics, so tell me how You organize your day, whether some things that you do that you like really really helpful in helping you accomplished all the things that you need to get done. So I know I feel, like I accomplished all the things I need to get tat. I started writing about it for me,

I get a warning and I'm a morning person the morning is my very favorite time and if I don't get my time so like I wake up early and wake up at like three hundred and forty five four in the morning by choice like I just love that time of day why you know apple, cider, vinegar and manoeuvre, honey like this is my ritual, a ritual, and then I my last and that waste is like. I feel good when across stop that list I never get through the less others, probably some bad psychology to that, but just organizing self in having rituals, I think, in the beginning of the day, sets it outright cause. You don't know, what's gonna happen while yet will you do? You know that your day is gonna, go bonkers at some point, Ray you're gonna get off track, and so just China grounding yourself in the morning. For me, that's the most important back. I'm gonna give me axiom, advice We're gonna hear more. I get up very early. very, very early? That's the time I think, especially when you have kids

when you have your heads. I've said with a million times of your kids. Wake you up it's too late. It's already do you because the other half regarding your day on defence instead of office, so by taking that time in the morning to really be centred with myself to set myself up for success. I am a better mom, a better leader cause. Then I'm waking, the kids up. I've been up for hours, I have energy, I'm excited till I get em go in, so that is your exactly the habits and the rituals are so he I will say and then I do a little different believe in youth. If listeners want China to it- I actually, while overload, might to do list, and maybe this is because In any event three, I don't know what that means. I'm an achiever and really. Do you guys tickles my fancy when I do exactly what I set out to do that day. So I

less three major moves like what are three things that if I only got those three things done today, I would have really push them needle in the direction that I wanted to go, and I find that that helps me stay focused I'm really bad. If I don't have direction, I will like emails that, oh, let me look at unlike adjust. I will do everything, but none of it matters so. That was a shift I made a few years ago and that I really helped me stay focused on try that yeah? I do not want to go back over one of the questions. I fear that I think is such a good wine is. She says I'm someone who wants to be as helpful as possible. How do I get now. How do you say? No in a work environment, honey you hold those boundaries strong around yourself cash. I think setting boundaries as one of the hardest things to do, and I

going back to what you just said. Like you really, I think, if you go back to, is this going to achieve my top three? Let's go with your top three. Is this going to contribute to my top three and if it isn't, then I thank you say no nicely, and if it is then ok, move it along. I think people also have a hard time saying no to outside of work right out. It's the same thing What I see it happen with women all the time and I think many people feel like they're about person if they say now, and I think you can you can say no in a good way. You can offer alternatives, there's lots of ways to help without taking it all on yourself, I need to learn to my own advice: dry, land ownership of nine years ago. God bless her asked me this question and I thought was like such a great share. You know, when you, let's say you're, getting asked to do things by people that you work where by your boss, like you, there's something you need to do our work

we started asking very intelligently, ok, which of the other tasks. You have been me? Would you like me to move down the priority less in order to accomplish this thing, because Actually I'm like. Oh here's, you know twenty seven things that we need to do and she was getting overwhelmed because she loses sight of things matter most and she's you know doesn't want to stay. Lay doesnt have come early and choose a cookie reach, but which one should I move lower down. Nonetheless, and it was so helpful to me because I am like oh my gosh you're, so yeah. If you have the floor, and with. Let me give you the order of how this should go. Ghana, thank you listen to your inner, like emotions on staff, because you can, if you're feeling resentful, then you're saying you asked him. If you're angry you're saying yes to mine, so you need to listen to your emotions. Along these lines and that can be really helpful tioga. How do you

navigate the new mentions or where I think it's such a good point, the flip side of that so what have you navigate like home life and death airlines and all of that and say no to the job, which is very important. But there are times when our jobs can can manage or ask too much, or we even have the perception like gosh. I gotta work through the weekends it to do these things are, how do you say strong enough I'm not really good at that. I have to say I like that. I'm really not- and I do you know, I'm the man that shows work over, you're going to say that thing whatever I was at school, you know I never handed out cupcakes. I never knew no draw my kids up at the bus that just wasn't me, but my kids know I love and you know, I said, is why reticent literally a readers just article like a hundred million years ago. That said the most important thing for kids to now is that you love them not that year,

doing everything you can with them or you know. Certainly I have quality time of my kids, but I am I am like sitting down and doing crafts and all that and I had to let go of that go a long time ago, and it still gets me sometimes, but my kids know let them I've got three boys you're raised by a strong woman, and I like they're gonna know when they go out into the world that you don't mess with women you're because I do think every kind of mom is the right kind of mom. There's! No, one right we'll be, and I would say as well working mom, especially something that really helped me was to identify. Some values that mattered most to me, not the matter.

the other moms at PTA, not that matter to my mother in law, but really were essential to me, like the capital teachers like this is what I will do with my kids and that allows everything else to follow a essentially. I said what will I always say yes to, even if that means that everything else is and no and that really helped me because owning a business, it isn't nine hundred and twenty five and it hasn't been eighteen years. So I is there. I wish I could be enough that fingers and that's what put it, but it's not, but I do have things that I am just non negotiable about because they matter to me and they matter to my kids, even if they don't matter to other people, that I was. Encourage listeners, you have to stand. for what you need, and I think you know we talked a lot in this episode about

doing it away, that's not off putting do it in a way the tumor is doing it. I know what you know, however, you want to set that up. You ve got to stand up for yourself and what you need in order to do the job. I think we ve seen this. In such a massive way in the last twelve months, because suddenly we have your working from home. And you're, a teacher Andrew Parenting and your important? It's much so if this last year haven't taught us to speak up for how we show up for our families for ourselves and, frankly, anchor have kids, you need to be able to stand up for yourself and and what's gonna make it work, and I think that that comes from the very beginning like, for instance, I was interviewing, someone yesterday for a really big Roland, my company and she said. Can you talk me through your core values? Can you talk me through? You know what it is that your building and one of our core values here is work hard live. Well,

so we believe in working really freaking hard like there are times that we're in a launch or we have an event or we're doing something that you are going to have to put away more hours and have to hustle harder to get to work your weekend. If you travel like that's what it is here, that's how we were, but we live well, we have unlimited vacation. You can take off as much time as you were. We encourage you to take care of your mental help. You need to work from home like and I think that we can hold the balance of both, but what that woman was doing in in relation with me was seeing, is, is better, What company, where I can common comfortably, be the type a matter that I want to be or have the taper wife and I want to have and there's a chance she could talk to me. But, like all we work, eighty hour weeks and she knows right from the beginning, yeah, that's it! That's not gonna be the thing. So I think that you would going back to the very beginning of our conversation with setting out intention reality before you look for what's next.

so that you know this is the dream. Let me said the girl. Let me be specific about what I want so that I can seek out a company that helps navigate there, but I think that's great advice. I also you know, I think the people you know they look at you. They look at people like me who have achieved a certain amount and I think they think that everything's easy for that a boy put right. I know it's funny bike, but I do think that- and I cannot tell you want once I was speaking to a group of women and when I told the truth about they were like all I did. This photo shoot. he thought it was so glamorous nice a gap. But when I left in the morning at that time I five year old, was like hang on my letter, going, don't go, mommy, don't go Crying I had to go to your blah blah and I remember so many women going. I didn't realize that you had to go through that to live, and I it's just a little things boat

I think when you let other women now like this, is my life to write its master guy gets not operated for me right. I buy bags of target salad right then fundamental ball. Anything from the world is not for me to answer. k to be massacres, that's lie. So I think That's a really important message for women like it is an all. You know roses in rainbows, like you just like trudged it you get you get through some days grade Sunday. There are one hundred percent, and I and especially if you're working mom too, because oh yeah, you know, I remember where my kids were younger. I would it would be like Friday and the young women in office would be like. What are you doing we can we're going to plant, I think really go hiking. Maybe my mom says: what are you doing like? I'm gonna go to care for kid.

It's not a meditation, not time off, I'm an award winning the door, and immediately be an mumbo; they will not care about. I'm tired. They will not care that I have make evolved from like that. That's my life, and this is the life I chose and Billy. I'm sorry Freaking bless and I love it, but that doesn't mean it's not hard and doesn't mean merit days, the don't start and to your point, but it is so important that women say that, because there are a lot of women, we will only show a glamour who will only show the air brass filtered photos on Instagram of how perfect their life is, and that makes other women feel like crap, because they're like. What am I missing exactly how I love that honesty, and I want to encourage the listeners, don't just absorb the honesty, also act that out in your community tell your father, let's talk about it with other women at work, speak the truth, because

the solidarity you find in that sisterhood is incredible and grew I agree name K. I appreciate you, I'm so grateful that we got this time is still like. Literally the perfect conversation given weapons history, mine and I hope that we ve given listener some food for thought- I shared soon wisdom and and and help to answer some of these questions out. Thank you for an hour and given us your brilliant advice, Oh thank you. I proceed being here and I hope that something is valuable. The people That means a lot, that's what it's all about Absolutely, while guys that was awesome. I hope you ve enjoyed this conversation with Kate Clan in partnership with by side with U S, bank, if you wanna, hear more episode like this, where we bring in someone really cool, who has a lot of experience and insight into a certain part of life or business, and then we answer questions. Let me now on Instagram drop me.

Sit on the hotline and let us know what you want to know and who your dream guess for the show would be. The Rachel Hollis podcast is hosted by me. Rachel Hollis our show is produced by Chelsea Har, fish and edited by Andrew Weller. With a dish I'll production support by sterling coats. Our executive producer is Cameron Bergmann. The Rachel Hollis podcast is three percent chance. Production.