This message is sponsored by discover: did you know you could reduce the number of unwanted calls and emails with online privacy protection? The latest innovation from discover discover what help regularly remove your personal info, like your name and address from ten popular people search webs? it's that could sell your data and they'll? Do it for free activate in the discover see terms and learn more at discovered dot com, slash online privacy protection today on something you should know. Did you know memorial day has a precise moment of remembrance I'll explain that the latest research on human personality and just how flexible your personality can be. For example,

if the person is extra, the news not to mean that they may not at times act in ways that are introverted when the needs arise. So, there's a flexibility in our personality that I think service very well, also Do you know what you should do if you get stung by a b and have you noticed people seem to argue today, more than ever a lot of reasons for that. One is simply that for a lot of reasons, we take things more personally now than we used to country the other reason there really is a lot to argue about people are about the very basic of human existence. All this today on something you should know, you know there's a pair. the chance that a while back you subscribe. something started paying for it and then for out about it, but you're still paying for it.

She's, why there's a service called rocket money used to be called true bill, and so here's the question you do you honestly know how many subscriptions you have, I mean think about it. There's video streaming services, video games, music, subscriptions online publications, premium, video channels, it's hard to keep track of em all. But if you don't keep track of em all well, you could. paying for subscriptions? You dont use and that's why there's rocket money, the It money ab, shows you all your subscriptions in one place and then cancels the ones, you don't want rocket money can even find some. Perceptions. You did even though you are paying for you. Might find out that you ve been double charge for a subscription and to cancel a subscription? They ve made this pretty easy. All you do is press the button that says, cancel and rocket money takes care of the rest.

now? Most americans think they spend around eighty dollars a month on subscriptions when the actual total is closer to two hundred dollars, so you could be wasting hundreds of dollars on subscriptions. You don't even know about or use, or even remember so get rid of useless subscriptions with rocket money now go to Iraq. Pocket money, dot, com, slash something this could save you. Hundreds of dollars a year? That's rocket money, dotcom, slash something something you should now fascinating into the world's top experts and practical advice you can use in your life today, something you should make her rather ass. I welcome This episode of something you should know is publishing memorial day, twenty twenty two, and while it is the unofficial start of summer, for many of us, it is all

the day that we remember and honour those people who died in service to their country. Since Nineteen seventy one memorial day is observed on the last monday of may, but before that from ten sixty eight to nineteen. Seventy, it was all observed on may the thirtieth, regardless of what day of the week it fell, it wasn't until nineteen seventy one that memorial day was made a national holiday, congress established an exact moment of remembrance on memorial day, then Show moment of remembrance act was adopted in December. Two thousand and eight encourages every citizen to pause each memorial day at three p m local time to remain the men and women who died in service to our country you'll know that major league baseball games played on memorial day usually come to a stop during that moment of remembrance and for the past

Several years, amtrak engineers have taken up the practice of sounding their horns. Precisely three p m, but department of affairs says that memorial day is celebrated in late. May, because that's what flowers are likely to be blooming across the country and those flowers can be used to decorate the graves of fallen soldiers, in fact The holiday was originally named decoration day in eighteen sixty nine, the head of an organization of union veterans establish decker asian day as away for the nation to honour the graves of those who had died in the civil war with flowers, and that is so then, you should know. a topic. Discussed here before, and that I find particularly interesting, is human personality. What you you. Why are you different than me where

do our unique personalities come from it and how changeable are they one reason I find this so interesting is a few years ago I had on this podcast as a guest. Brian little brain is for front of research on the topic of personality, then he's back to discuss the very latest news on the topic. Brian the author of the book me myself in us, the science of personality and the art of well being so he's active fill us in on the latest. I brian welcome. Thank you very much so as a quick recap. I know we discuss this a couple years ago, but what is a personality? How do you define it? personality is- is the way in which we are. Each of us is like all other people, like some other people and like no other person its differences in the way we think feel an act

and its massively consequential for the way in which our lives go, but not Everybody is happy with their personality or or at least parts of their personality. There's always things you want to change, and I always wonder lightly, you try to change your fundamental personality that that that's likely doomed to fail No, we used to think that term. in fact within change once coins, the phrase, but thirty you personalities set like plaster We now know that that's not true their people, and the personnel and teach can shift over time. usually not dramatically. God, for short term investments in projects that matter to you. You can change it its quite ubiquitous to save.

A person is extra virgin. Who does not mean that they may not at times, in ways that are better characterizes either introverted, when the needs arise, so the notion that we have fixed rates. I think car at that notion is, is Is somewhat less held him in scientific esteem than it used to be a number of years ago. There's a flexibility in our personality right, think certain story. Well, so I standard personalities, shift over timing, my personality has changed and I'm not the same person. I was ten years ago personality is different, so stan bad- and I understand it that people can and change their personality. For the occasion you poland, their baggage tricks and be someone else, beam assertive when they're, not typically, but you can't. If you're shy person? You can't decide one day

Gonna be an extrovert from now on and for the rest of my life, or can you The honest answer that is, we stood quite know, there's a very active research programme going on now on I see that issue on how much the change What is the extended that changing our permanent might that change big, What we know now is that it is easy attitude change in the relatively short term, robin Williams. You just used to describe insolvency sites, a site, specific extrovert and every time he went on stage here now their role of extrovert term quitter? actually bud. Did he actually ever become the next evert? He would say no. We would like many of us, Dr himself, this as an interview It would seem that it would be so difficult to change.

For robin williams, to change from being an introvert to an extrovert full time is, it would just be to effort full. It would take too much work. wouldn't feel natural and it would be exhausting. Try to be somebody you're, not precisely right as exactly right, but you may be in a situation where you have very little choice but Protract deadly act out of character and sometimes with a year your listers may say yeah. Actually, I've been acting of character for seventeen years because of my partner. Naturally a very shine person very introverted, the languages, but my partner is fully engaged in the social life door. My partner

and so I have collude in as it were, to present myself we sometimes feel myself to be an extrovert. In fact, I'm a pseudo extrovert. You might be saying of yourself right now, really me, but I think it's important to realize that that is not necessarily normal She may actually be quite heroic It may be no more europe acting again your bio agenda disposition in order then suddenly, and that means the world to you. We often do it out of professionalism like robin william, said but we also do a lot of love. Maybe a naturally disagreeable ram, bunches individual her certainly has his life transformed by

that is a little seven pounds baby in his arms and he is completely ship. into gentle soft nurturing his Follow me is that you said, any sense you just ingenuous. I don't think so. People more complex than you, ve gotta basic matron, you better stay, tudor life isn't meaningful Do you sense that most people like their personality or most people, wish it was different nurse regional research on this. That suggests that most people, when asked along. The big five traits of personality There are very predictable changes that they would like to make whether theirs only strong, they would devote A part of their life to achieving those is another matter, but down big five, as you know, mayo is spelt out yet I ocean open.

Conscientiousness extra version agreeableness and you write or the army new radishes on? If you want to avoid the ocean acronym stability and if you ask people how they would like to be on each of those dimensions in western culture. What you find is that most people would like to be more open, in contrast to fixed in their world if they'd like to be more a conscientious and they're. All parts of implications of that extra version people tend to want to be more extroverted, even though we know that there are benefits truth and being more introverted agreeable. Most people want to be agreeable, or more agreeable, and most people further be lower in your office is a march. Conversely, high instability, so there sad expectation that turn people would give the choice and a chance would

the shift in those directions? One of the things we know is psychologist is that there are real benefits both ends of those normally distributed traits are there are aspects of a bit super? Conscientious, don't you compare explore their aspects of your version that are dysfunctional and the same within introversion, the same with the opposite ends of each of those big five dimensions so I think that's important to realize that There are costs and benefits to both enzo those frequently invoked dimensions. Do you think that most people are accurate when they place themselves on those spectrums. Yes to it, Actual? You mean: do they to show agreement with other individuals who know the well, who were also asked to write down

so the on the map between your own self rating and those of others who knew well is, is quite high. an extroverted person who self rate is extroverted is not likely to be seen as interpreted by other individuals. There may be some exceptions to this, depending on the role that you're playing in your life and where these other people, see you most often, but generally speaking, people have a pretty accurate view of where they stand on the big five, at least as some indexed by agreement with other individuals, we're talking about, latest research in the fascinating topic of human person. quality. My guest is brian little. The name of his book is me myself and us the science of personality and the art of well being people. Tell me frequently. In fact, sometimes they even leave it in their reviews of this podcast, something to the effective,

Thank you for telling me about the jordan harbinger show, which I do here occasionally You see the jordan harbinger show is a cast. It's it's a bit like this one. In that joy, in talks with really fascinating people, but it has a slight a different angle for ample. He recently spoke with KEN croak who went underground. or in a notorious motorcycle club and stories that now that will amazing and in another episode he talked with Dallas taylor, who works sound design some really interesting information about how sound works in movies and television and how sound is used to manipulate your emotions. The Jordan harbinger show, is what you call a top tier podcast. Jordan just has a real talent, forgetting his guest to tell stories you ve never heard before and offer thought provoking insights and he always pulls out tactical bits of wisdom in every episode all to help. You

a more informed and critical thinker, you're going the jordan harbinger show. I just know it because well cause you like this podcast and with all the had cast to choose from this recommend nation will cut down your search time to find your next favoured podcast, two zero check out the odin harbinger show an apple podcast, spotify or wherever you listened ipod. Guess I play games on my smartphone now. Actually, only play one game? It's best fiends best, fiend is the online puzzle game that is so much fun and any and you can add a little funding your day. Well, that's a winner, book now been laying for a while. So I mind level four thousand: eight hundred and eighty five, it's called cracking cocoanuts its hard level at what I have to defeat for slugs and get twenty cocoanuts, which is hard,

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level, five, that's friends! Without the are best fiends So Brian, I'm wondering about the connection between personality and motivation I guess what I mean by that- is, for example, is there a certain personality type that is say more likely to exercise or eat better? Is that purse reality driven or is that something else intimately linked to personality? for example the trade of course, anxiousness Those who are high in conscientiousness are likely to get there done, get them down well, get them dunham time their likely. As you know, be surprised to hear to do well in school to do well in their organizations to get promoted. than those who are lower and conscientiousness while people

are sometimes surprised to hear about themselves when they reflect on the conscientiousness, is, there are also likely to be healthier, and there are also likely, perhaps surprisingly, to live longer. And the reason so a person's health is, is what intimately related to their conscientiousness? They take pills? They check their weight to check their blood pressure, and so it's not surprising on reflection that date, to be on health. the visuals will you brought up something that I think a lot of parents in particular would find this curious. I you may have two kids, one whose very kind She anxious and you know, does its homework makes his bed it does those things that just make it easy and then you might have

it, whose lower on the scale of conscientiousness, who doesn't do all those things, and I in it drives parents crazy, because it is it that he doesn't or she doesn't care do they do they wish they were more conscientious and in its driving them crazy? Why, Would someone not be conscientious and why when someone be conscientious on their own without having to be told to do stuff. What's going on, there reading, isn't it as is paid some were really support. when that second one comes along, there is an interesting theory. It it it's been partial. Supported in imperial studies, so I shall put in that caution, but there is a notion to their look. When I come mish fidelity and it's been away in some studies to to birth order, so the

First born is a word, gets the pick a noose. They can accept sir by organic dispositions with impunity and there as can shape to their expectations as well, well Second, child comes along them addendum nations, the conscientious one, let's say or the extroverted one was that it has. Our been taken, and so the family dynamics, you you! compete, but he's probably two years older she's a year and a half older than you. So it's hard to compete, So what you do is you set up your own identity newish now this is, conscious. Of course, you don't consciously say she's, always a good girl, so I'll be the bad girl There seems to be a kind of psychological pressure to developing your own self and Consequently, this is why you often find their kids said. You would expect to be very similar on personnel aid rates. In fact, quite term are quite different.

so the child who is not conscientious, doesn't look at the one who is in go? Oh, I wish I was more like that, or does he not necessarily, and in fact, and in many cases I realise that they can never be as conscientious as that kid who's two years older. And they designed to be the funny one. Funny one is often late, but as a a hilarious excuse, the wider late yet again I think, as I say, the empirical work on this is complex processes are complex, so it may well be there in where one is seven and the other is nine. Seven. Your own is now able to say boy. My brother really gets a lot of rewards and a lot of loving when he asked where he does. I think I think I will love a copy of it That happens. That's why these are common.

The phenomena run in simple cause effect. I know that you talk about how These five elements of personality can predict in some way. Is how your life go. So can you run through the five elements and and what you by that, for example, with with openness it is, can to leading lives that are creative and and and able to into new demands and others don't explore country. just as you likely to be to do taciturn norman, open expected. You do them well, they're, not necessarily created there. They have important implication. as for keeping society rolling along action. If you're able to learn bring positivity two situations and to notice the good things going on in orient them agreeable people, people going there lovely to having groups because they avoid conflict.

And they are acting so a way as to bring others in fruitful engagement with each other and even your right strike a vertical the highly sensitive individuals they a function there. can you reason the mine a highly neurotic individually Anyone who is also introverted, ceased sir happening that their more extroverted peers. Well, my nose. They see a hint. of antagonism group, their work here? They notice a flicker of frustration in their partner in a way that a more stable person may simply oblivious to now it is true that they may over and fur, and they may see threats that do not materialise. But without those

You have our sensitive, perhaps oversensitive on too the dangers and our environment were, were at risk. We need to have those those sanctions play a role in our group functioning and I think this is something that people may not appreciate. Do you think that the the goal of changing your personality is a worthy goal. It light if if this is something that really bothering you or is that likely going to fail and your personality changes much more or annex ii as life deals what it the to you, rather than you specifically saying, I'm going to be this way. Instead of that way, I think that it, and very much on what your cord projects are in your life, these are still

in the final analysis, the most important question we can ask of an individual is not one. Are you want your basic trade structure, its one. the things you're pursuing the to you and their certain core projects? then in join us to act in ways that take us out of character, and I said fan as long as they are sustainable those projects? They bring great meaning to our lives and they contribute, importantly to the shape of our life. If we do there, we may find that we're, starting as we discuss before, to burn out, and A necessary consequence of this pattern dynamics use it? You have when I call restorative nations imo classic endeavoured but ass, a professor, I like to act out of character and,

during the morning I'll stand on my head to get my students excited, but after Actually I need to find what color is the of niece inward. I can become more into burden lower that level of stimulation. Even if the beings hiding in the washroom from my students with my feet, up I need to do that in order to retain the capacity to go back the next day pursue that core project of exciting my students and I Rare many of us are like this. We we we pursue projects that give meaning in our lives in mind judgment. Those projects are more to understand the what type of and what type of person we are. But when you think about your personality, who you are. I mean you have your personality. I have my personality and that's essentially, what separates us sets the difference between you and me, and I think it's worth while understand what what a personality is in

changeable it is in and why it is the way it is brian little has been my guest. He is one of the leading experts on the topic of personality. Currently a senior fellow in person analytics at the wharton school at the university of pennsylvania and the name of book is me myself in us the science? personality and the art of well being and there's a linked. Book in the shone out thanks, but I appreciate you coming on During my tinctured, we are about to under the very busy holiday season. So low for you your listening to this, because I wanted how do you about factor it's a ready to eat meal delivery service where they shop, prep cook and deliver right to your door. Chef, crafted dietician, approved meals without all the hassle. Now I want to be

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it seems we live in a world today where everyone is arguing no longer ok to have differing opinions. You have tell someone who disagrees with you. Why they're wrong here, when you think about, at most arguments. Dont, really, in the other person changing their mind. No one says off and I'm such immediate. I dont know what I was thinking. You're right, I'm wrong, and yet people still argue maybe it's human nature and since p we are going to argue arguments must serve a purpose. They must matter. So, let's take Look at why they matter with Lee siegel Lee is in author of seven books he's a writer and cultural critic whose written for harpers, the new republic, atlantic monthly, the new yorker and the new york times- and he is author of a book called why arguments matter highly welcome to something you should know greatly

here. So I'm wondering what's the difference between an argument of fight or a quarrel or our are they all the same thing- a quarrel of courses in arguments that takes place between two egos? A quarrel is too infused with a motion to be an argument when people say, let's not argue out with their really mean, let's not fight. It isn't a fine, it's a reasoned disagreement where both sides want to win at the same time, while both sides know they can't win and they're going to have to work out. A compromise as well, that all sounds nice in civilised, but a lot of the art in that I see on television and social media and its its people getting really nasty with each other There are a lot of reasons for that. One. Simply that we just take for falada reasons. We take things more personally now than we used to don't and

I think the other reason is that it really is a lot to argue about. No, you know. People are arguing about the very basic set of human existence, sexuality, gender. How to raise our children. Those things, really, whenever part of the public argument, they were never part of our political life. Nobody in nineteen fifty eight was arguing about pronouns from ample. So there is a great deal to argue about, and it's not surprised that some of these arguments, because they have to do with identity, that they get so personal and out of control, so: what's the advice to keep it from getting so personal and out of control. Will it took a lot

I'd look about empathy, which is an over used bird, sometimes confused with sympathy, empathy just feeling what the other person is feeling, but is there that the basic ability of put yourself in someone else's shoes- and I think that a good mental exercise for arguing is- is to make the? Poland's argument more fully and more convincingly, then your opponent ever could and then you kind take a turn and then try within the boundaries of reason, to take up the argument apart, but first you have to make the other argument. You have to master your opponents argument before you proceed to attack. And so how do you do that immature arguing with someone you think their position is just completely crazy off base. How do you make there arguments for that How do you do you do that

let's take an extreme example. Let let's take somebody who thinks the election was stolen in a twenty twenty and someone who thinks the election was legitimate. Let's say I take the side of the person who thinks the election was legitimate and are arguing with someone who's convinced that the election was stolen. Well, I'm going to try to see things through that person's eyes. I'm going to I'm going to descend into it the way, a kind of method actor prepare for a role, I'm gonna? Look at my side, the democratic sidesa bunch of elite is make me angry because nobody likes to be top down to nobody on any side, a bunch of people who I for a living just to get what they want people recital anybody deals with that in life. All that stuff makes me angry. People who seem to control have their levers on and on all the powerful forces in society, education and the media

yeah the publishing wow. I don't like that, but nobody likes to a situation where the fix is in, and I'm going to look at at my own side through that, lends not gonna get pretty angry. I'm going to start my argument by I know how you feel I know, You mean, I know that you feel talk down to an condescended to I feel like that. I saw my father who went bankrupt. I saw him go through that and then starting from that point of view, I would begin to sort of men.

It turned towards my own point of view, but along emotional lines. I I would say what I feel the same way. I feel that in being told that my vote was was the product of a lie that I'm being manipulated and so we're both being bullied into that. Let's, let's look at. Let's look for things that are provable facts. Let's look for evidence. Let's look for the most reasonable figures on each side. Then I gradually try to turn the argument around to my point of view, but I think, in order to be a good argue, or you have to be a little bit of a parent and you have to be a little bit of a therapist everybody's Who'S- a parent has argued with a contrary child. You know children who get maniacally fixated on on on their their belief that they're right and then you know you. You want to be a little bit of a therapist and you want to reach out.

In a kind of empathetic kind away to the other side? Then then you begin to invoke reason. Evident fact might not work, but it certainly better than screaming and insulting from the outset. So you really kind of meeting them where they are and then the seeing, if you can

It would find that common ground and then get them to see your point of view rather than scream at them for being an idiot. What you have to do is acknowledge someone's dignity as a person. You know that's the starting point and you you you, you will you'll have to first show them that you respect them and once you do that, I think that once you establish a kind of complicity, you know I I teach a literature class at a university and the main thing is the first class. You establish complicity you're in this thing, together, you're kind of conspiring together, you can do it through humor humor is essential to this enterprise. You can do it without it, but a joke always helps making people smile, you empower them, you make them feel good about themselves. I guess you have to be a little bit of a

I meant to pick your point of view in an argument once you do that you know, then they begin to cut you some slack. Then you could get passionate and yet, oh, when people argue on social media, it's hard to acknowledge the other person as a person, because it isn't a person yuri, it's just words on a screen. I imagine, is why things can get out of hand because it isn't person to person, it isn't personal at all I mean if you're on twitter, you only have one hundred or two hundred and eighty characters at a shot right and if you're you're you're on social media, yet you're just looking at the screen, which basically is just a form of a. sure in a way and you're just you know, you're arguing you're inside your own head, it's the the opponent is a stick figure. That is the problem you know, but but if you're arguing in person well boy there's so many things you can do in person to placate someone to make them feel human to make them feel.

Welcome bright. Just the way you look at somebody will. It certainly does seem that arguments are getting last year that people are getting nastier towards other people when they do agree to do you it getting worse. Can it get worse? Why I? You know, I am an optimist and I think that things always get worse as they get better. the pendulum swings in american life and people really want to be in the center. Everybody I know is either left of center or right of center. I know very few extremists and I think, because the media is so focused on the extremes, it gives them a and Fine. Then it seems that we are living in a more extremist world than we are, but most people they could all day, but what what they want. But you know the old freudians qualities right work. They want to be successful in their work. And they want to be able to love into beloved

Sometimes seems to me that arguments don't matter because I'm not going to change your mind, you're not going to change my mind, so what good can come from this other than we just get mad at each other? You know they're there of cases in which argument, just as you I said my is that really they could just walk away from it, but why do they need to get themselves up into a lather over it right? Exactly I mean I think that happens alive. It would people that are just there's no way. There's two polarizing there's no way anybody's gonna budge from their position. So why are we doing this? Why? Indeed you know if I, if my wife yells at me this morning- and I I Didn'T- I left a pile of dishes in the sink and she yells at me, and she makes me feel bad about myself and then in the course of like work. He said something about ukraine that I don't agree with. I'm gonna blow up against them and argue vehemence but it's really my wife and andrea. You know this is so of this is symbolic, and some

if the argument is because it involves emotion, bureau, it draws its energy from other things that are going on in our lives since we're all gonna argue throughout our lives with other people. What advice do you have that that would make besides what you have said so far advice that would help the arguments, go better? There were all in this together. I know this is gonna sound, really kind of sentimental and employing, but you know where we're in britain together our portion of life is, is small life passes very quickly. Anything can happen. The things that are very precious to us are fragile, and if we take a step back and see our lives under the aspect of mortality of fragility and see that everyone is subject to that and our worst enemies broke the good of those someday they're going to weaken and get in and get ill

to take a step back and see that not everything is at stake. Every moment, if I am arguing with my neighbour about immigration, Whoever wins we're not going to change immigration policy to either of us take a step back. What are we really arguing about to really kind of think it through? I might be arguing because my wife made me feel that he might be arguing because it's boss, yelled at him. You know just to kind of take a step back. That's all see things enough largest context possible. But when you do state your position, when you are trying to let the other person, I know that you did to have a difference of opinion. Is it better to just stated or

Is it better to work up to it or is this? Is there a strategy, gray question, I think everything is depends on the context. You know if it's a personal thing, if you're a dinner or something like that, you you always have to preface it with something soft. I see your points it and ass. I said before give give. See to the person, everything so much of what they're saying concede see their own humanity can see their own experience. Sometimes, if you know I mean if it's an argument, a soccer field over the treatment of your kid arguments, beckoned easily degenerating into a quarrel or something worse well, you might at the outset. I want to be a gentle but firm and say you know I have to take exception to what you did. I really don't understand at something like that. In those cases you know everything depends on tone of voice if

you're making a written argument. Everything depends on the language that you choose in the cadences soak. I context is everything Will it just seems that so many arguments end up with real resolution that people get upset they get mad at each other. They make their case and walk away, upset and nothing? changed other than now. Now people are upset that there's be a better way. Sometimes it's it's. It's it's really great to sort of shift gears I was once once watching and I sometimes go on youtube and get lost in stuff. You know, and there was a great interview:

with marlon brando with dick habit, the old dick cavett show and cavett was asking questions to brands that I guess board brando and brando. He he he wanted to derail the line of questioning. So he said you see this bracelet. He pointed to a turquoise bracelet that he said. Stevie wonder, gave me this on the plan yeah. I was just sitting there and Stevie wanted to come up to me and said man. I really love your stuff. I want you to have this bracelet ever you could hear a pin, drop, just silence and an actor knows how to do that. Just to really shift the ground from underneath your opponent, that's a great thing to do as as a cooling off tactic, but also disarming tactic here, interesting. My wife did this to somebody. Just yesterday we were at my son's soccer game and there was a guy on the sidelines in and, and he was given, a rough are really hard time, which is not supposed to do. There's rules about that. You know you're supposed to respect the reps decision.

in all this, and people were yelling at him and my wife for just happened to walk by him, and she said you know these rafts her volunteers, you know that I then I would like to inscribe upon a copy of my book to her, because that that's that's a great and that took the in that of all the other hostility. I bet rice. Sucked it right away. The guy the guy was just bewildered like boy, I'm a high entity, so that you know that is exactly what I am talking about. I have nothing to add to that. She shifted the ground. She she she she changed. The weather, all of a sudden and people are speechless. You know because again everything's context, you introduce a new context. All of a sudden people being human, have to adapt to the new context. and when it's like that, it's it's very hard to switch, because you're, so you're so invested in the other contexts that who, as I whiplash, what that's right

If you go back to the other context. Well, then you look like a jerk wiki dorothy. If that ship had already sailed. Although you look like a jerk twice in a row right exactly well, you know I have friends that that get into these arguments with people, mostly politics, and they get so frustrated knives, trying to talk to person and they just wouldn't, listen and anna, I don't typically enter into those kinds of discussions and to those kinds of arguments, because not because I dont have feeling in and beliefs. certain issues. It's just that. I don't see the point in the argument because, as I have said before, that it just doesn't seem like anything its accomplished they don't change your mind, you don't change their mind and all people do is get, said so so, what's the point

Lee siegel, has been my guest. He is an author boys, authored seven books in his latest is called why arguments matter and there's a linked to that Look in the shone out. Thankfully, thanks my it's really been greater to talk with. You with warm whether comes the buzzing of bees and that and there is always a chance of some one getting stung Do you know what to do if somebody get stung by a according to the american academy of dermatology website. The first thing to do is to get the stinger out as quickly as possible because the longer the stingers stays in the skin. The more votes it releases, which adds to the persons pay. and swelling to remove the stinger, you should remove it by scraping over it with fingernail or a piece of gauze or or a credit card to kind of set out from the side never use tweets

is to remove a stinger as squeezing it with tweezer. Can cause more venom to release into your skin. Also, if do get stung. Try this a calm, most be these will only sting once, but wasps and hornets can sting again if you are If stung, you should calmly walk away from the area to avoid additional attacks wash the sting with soap in water and apply a cold pack to reduce swelling. However, if the swelling moves to other parts of your body, such as face or your neck? You should go to the emergency room immediately because you may be having an allergic reaction other signs of an allergic reaction include difficulty, breathing, nausea, hives or dizziness. Consider taking over the counter pain, medication be wasp, and when its things can be really painful. Painkillers.

I see the manifest or ibuprofen can help relieve the pain, and although most people do not experience severe reactions to be stings, it's a good idea to keep your eye on anyone who has been stung in case they d more symptoms and that something you should know, as I hope you can hell by listening. We worked pretty hard here to bring you interesting guests and interesting information, and if you appreciate that you can do us a favour by telling someone you know about this five cast and asking them to listen, I might carruthers for listening today to something you should know,

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