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Episode 28: The War On Christmas - 2019 Christmas Special

2019-12-20 | 🔗

In the twenty-eighth episode of The Babylon Bee podcast, editor-in-chief Kyle Mann and creative director Ethan Nicolle welcome you to the Babylon Bee Christmas Special which will be much much better than the Star Wars Holiday special. Well, at least better than The Last Jedi. Kyle and Ethan talk to Captain Andy Miller of the Salvation Army, bring in two scholars to debate the existence of Santa Claus, talk Christmas movies, and read listener submitted stories.

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Show Outline

Stories Of The Week: Christmas stories over the years

Story 1 (2018) - Mall Santa Arrested For Punching Man Who Denied Divinity Of Christ

Story 2 (2017)- New Museum Memorializes Fallen Heroes In The War On Christmas

Story 3 (2016)- Starbucks Unveils New Satanic Holiday Cups

Dramatic Poem: The War On Christmas

Interview: A conversation with Captain Andy Miller III of The Salvation Army. Andy Miller is a sixth-generation Salvation Army officer who loves Jesus, his family, and the opportunity to serve God through The Salvation Army. He and his wife, Captain Abby Miller, have been officers since 2007. Andy is Area Commander of The Salvation Army - Tampa.

Main Topic: Christmas

  • The Great Debate for the Existence Of Santa with William Lane Kringle and Scrooge McDawkins

  • Kyle and Ethan’s Top Five Christmas movies:

    • #5 Kyle: Die Hard, Ethan: Jingle All The Way

    • #4 Kyle: Rudolph The Red-Nosed Reindeer, Ethan: Gremlins

    • #3 Kyle: Home Alone, Ethan: Die Hard

    • #2 Kyle: It's Christmas Time Again, Charlie Brown, Ethan: A Christmas Story

    • #1 Kyle: The Santa Clause, Ethan: Home Alone

  • Listener submitted Christmas stories

 

Paid Subscriber Portion:

Should you tell your kids Santa is real? Kyle, Ethan, and Dan debate.

More listener stories

Ethan and Kyle share their own Christmas stories

Dave DeAndrea reads NOEL By JRR Tolkien

 

Become a paid subscriber at https://babylonbee.com/plans

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
In a world of fake news. This is news you can trust winning the war on Christmas, even though candy canes are gross with your hosts, Keilman and Ethan Nicole over the fake news outside is frightful, but that's fire is so delightful and Babylon Bee is dope. Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow. Yes, we are sitting here by the fire with a of cheer cheer who put those starts on that fire. There roasting quite nicely love that sent just Enigma boiling in the past
I love that we made Davidson dope here is that it references f, drug reference ever he's doing anything good. Well, not the drugs are good. As somebody would say, thing about the were interest. I don't like it. It was better untroubled. It was between dope fat in tight Yokohama slopes and only dope random snoops dope did you say: do it as a junior, higher, no! I was never that cool I was, I was ended dope I mean I wasn't it dope. But I said, let it tourism, I said: do ah, so that our Christmas episode have very excited and by the way, I'm sick of the dog right now. So I'm gonna try not to call for the microphone too much, but we ll have to Edison costs. Out of the thing, is I'm dying look at what we can do to their Christmas where Christmas everyone These are firstly, holiday, absurd everybody it's giving up some kind of, but it was. It was a feller region.
Did bring a dollar and we just record earlier. We didn't know Thanksgiving amply didn't really do artificial, Thanksgiving episode. So this this is our first right, so The much anticipated long awaited Babylon B. Christmas special. Yes, a lot of things going, I'm going to eat some Christmas stories. We have reef interview with this evasion army and ways. You to go help out the Salvation Army. They were embroiled kind of in a little chick, fully controversy. So we have a little discussion about that. Whilst we have, we got we're having epic debate between, two scholars on the subject of the existence of Santa Claus: yeah apologetic. Sir everybody and it's important to acquit people, follow allow apologetic. I was a stretch, was a strategy We also have some stories from listeners, so you The annual US, a bunch of stories we raise we can
to all of them. We picked out a good, not only ten twelve hours and we're gonna go through him. So I assume my own owner and that deep grown that you heard from across the land just kidding. I love your stories of airspace. To meet were also get account down our top five Christmas movies. Yes, we will. And so that's, let's do it. Men are running a dive in for some reason. My weekly stories, let's do it every week stories. These are some of them more Santa arrested punching man who denied divinity of Christ CUP how so Does the Santer like crushed a Christian. Well, we'll get to that later when I'm bait his existence. Okay, let me have that with those two scholars that are coming in, but I saw it cuz, I'm making the accident get this one.
Yes, Madame on the show, I don't get a joke about it's kind of an apocryphal story, but but there A story that went around saying that legend, their real scented, Saint Nicholas phasing out of the real one punched areas right. Am I right who did who did knows all the suffered that now he should be the one coasting who denied the divinity of Christ yeah supposedly. This is that the Council of NICE Ia And they were coming up with the nice the increase in Latin beating and sing. It was their Saint Nick supposedly there, and what is this new say again there in there so I guess you could say he was the MIKE Tyson of church history, so he punched Suppose I recently I've heard without a plan until they get punch in the face MIKE Tyson is best quote, has a good call for just for life get punch in the face and your plans I've that about war too, you have a plan and, under the shot, start firing in
that doesn't matter anymore, sizzler satire like that you have a joke and then you get one the face the bullets in the box and punches? That's hardly so the sand. Mozart is a real heroes who thank you for your service, mall Santa yeah, ok, I'll! Do the next story. New Museum memorialize has fallen heroes in the war on isthmus. If you are a hero, a veteran of the war on Christmas, we just want to say you for your service, this holiday, I mean Christmas Christmas season, that was a close one. I was close here for Christmas is really more like veterans day again. That's, moreover, within their hats. Never forget, Canada, never forget Cause he adds a war at a time of war, really how many millions of people who think of died so far in the war on wondrous, countless I have here Cameron who saved Christmas. We hang
shall cartridges on the Christmas tree, one for each dead. Nor is gonna warrior light, a candle on my you're waiting for their return yeah so, are we fallen hero in the war on Christmas yesterday there is about Eddie forty miles an hour. Wind said our house and we put out Santa we have a big inflatable, Santa Anna Vacantly- isn't that sacrilege, probably big Inflatable Santa and a big inflatable snow Man and the Santa I found. I saw him down the street in a bush. I have. When I look at those on phasing out another browser again, then the snow man is just completely gone. I've known He blew away forever and he's just got ruptured, melted. So when I see those inflatable giant things and people's ones, I think Why would anybody buy by their employers here, is to ask the people bought it. While by that and now I know a guy here- I am
let me now after I'm not really! Then you know I'm not a huge member. I do like festive house looks yeah you guys, go to the thoroughbred lights. Yeah, there's those inflated done at this year. We have now Syria, guys wanna, go: oh family family only yeah. It's DR only now they're right at this right. I think they changed it. Didn't every year gets more police until it's gonna be like. Let's not, we stayed up there and then, what's the point to go, I'm know Because if we want a large family, be illegal logging in Heaven Let's get it all, be suited to watch our kids and we can all go in one car is couples. So the kid is our kids hate. I dare to spoiled all the younger kids like it, but the two we have like our junior island. You do. I have to get a tar, eleven year old,
I want to fill a video of her like being like Alek. It or about Christmas lights, and I have two and then I want to play it for her when she got up and has a kid he's trying to get them to go, see the lights like here, You owe you deserve this. That's a great idea that eventually its assets I think now and then are there so many opportunities that I'd be creating ichor encyclopedia of these moments for her well used to be hard to do, because you know you, you had to get up a giant family, a video camera camera, and now we can now be subtle and record him all the time. Oh I'm just texting, someone whom you that's great I hear story number three, Starbucks, unveils new satanic holiday cups. So these are kind greatest hits. The cinema Christmas theme. So that this was one of our first ones that got sloped. If I remember rightly yeah, I've seen them an early hour missing an email coming about this one every time
yet shared and incentives is one of those that just flares up where we don't even share some one else finds it shares its real. I can't believe this scene, you can't make this stuff up and then they share it and- and it goes around so is it's nice there's a authentic room on the cup. That was one of my first Photoshop Sue the programme on the cup. Is it wasn't great, but it was ok. I think you did you and you do a new version for the best of Bulgaria. The additives before the vote on it. Blood everywhere, a goat being sacrificed in the background. I'm too lazy do all that the ristas with goods on a circle, Tell your email cannot that Milady was so nice about about Jews like a little home. I have it up. Believing leaving to do this. But you know I don't want to call you liars or is really sweet that likes you You please, where no medium for later source, good God this is accurate, but according to the website, I'm looking at the the article- and it's got one point:
million shares, yet it's probably right Our Babylon be numbers, yet it's a big and it just gets because we ve shared it since twenty sixteenth every year gets bigger more within their original controversy. Was that what it said Let's have a go, hide, a Happy holidays cup or something I don't even know that there was a controversy. Is one of those- is something it's one of those things where there's like three now really a guy. There might be three people that have been media training in the media creates a sea at a controversial man. The controversies, always there cups, don't say merry Christmas. This year, Bulgaria, happy holidays or some of the other What did they have like a snow man or a Christmas tree or snowflake on it, and then they just took that off and then it was just a red cup. I don't know. Maybe it's not even my fifth, I think most part of this article? Is christian groups expressed concern over this new design, but They believers reportedly relieved that Starbucks,
not promoting something like unity or tolerance. Sorry, Christians. We are your brothers Just in case you can get meddling in the Spirit of the holidays. We all know that the war on Christmas is real. The battle is being waged every day, but it only ramps up as the day approaches, and so we this very somber poem. Ladies and gentlemen, please remove your hats Dave. The Andrea does dramatic. Reading of the poem the war on Christmas,
tourism. No before Christmas battle was waged, this holidays, not all inclusive, they raged land mines were buried under piles of snow waiting for the docks statements of faith and christian soldiers lay traumatized after them dead. His visions of Starbucks cups flashed in their hands on the sea. Turning banner blasphemous disgrace of Christ out of Christmas, put impacts in this place, nativity scenes now scenes of war and destruction. Penny ACL, use onslaught of liberal corruption, tore down the green and red decorations, replace them with a rainbow flags. What devastation smouldering wreckage despair came, a marmalade glow with a halo of hair of hope, christian soldier be of good cheer. They can't take away Christmas, not this year. They can take down the trees. Silence songs were there. No, why ass warrior stand strong president eternal tromp stand in their way. The war on Christmas is an over not today.
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right now in the store we just put up the opportunity to pre order. Our new Babylon be best of book. It's gonna be a big twelve inch by twelve inches square coffee table book. They think you re pack all kinds of brand new pictures and even more jokes than your heart could desire gotta shop, DOT Babylon be dot com, backslash products backslash be book. You good luck! pre order be sure you're one of the first in line to get the book luck in the price now and when the book is done in twenty twenty it'll be on your coffee table right Next year, Bible lets me onto our interview with any Miller. You wanna do that Sharia whose cook that it know much about Salvation Army, and I learned some the learned some to ease captain captain. He's a fan of Babylon B, o captain my captain of Salvation Army. So let's do this presenting an exclusive Babylon. We interfere. Well, everybody stand at attention. Because we are here with an authentic army captain
That's right, the Salvation Army, that is the grizzled veteran, the grizzled Salvation Army, veteran Andy Miller, who is a six generation, Salvation Army officer, achieving the rank of care didn't you do an anti do well never had such a reduction. Very solemn. You know we have we respect the troops here and threw out. Thank you for your service were honoured didn't. I tell you a captain in the Salvation Army. You have to go to like a military academy, or something or had had it. How did you get to where you are it's interesting now that is not exactly a carries. Its similar there's a process called a training, school or training college where everywhere. The savage only serves in a hundred and thirty one countries around the world. They are connected. I want a conference, maybe the Methodist Church right, our district and other denominations. We have territories, so there are four territory:
where is for the shabby army in the United States, and there are four training. Schools is one in allay, so you guys can unless today and then I M with the Chicago in New York and self, you go through a two year: training process, the residential programme, similar tat. I got a christian right school and dumb go through there and then you get to be commissioned the actually eyes a lieutenant is for the first five years and then you get achieved the high rank of captain like I am aware and sources how many like battles are wars? Have you fought yeah? many young men in a few of them right now You still have your limbs. I do. I have all violence. At the moment I haven't received the purple heart yeah. Just talk and before the the episode recording and we always thought Salvation Army had the Santa hats. Yeah. I was ringing bells outside things, but I guess that's not a real salvation army thing attraction
do you believe in Santa do you not believe Ozanna, I'm sorry to say that we do use of every now and then a Santa Claus does want to somebody wants to ring bells. That has a stand out bit. I'm glad that I have, I think it's become associated with the american assorted feels like when you see a movie like, the story- starts off with his Salvation Army band. Other other We often have a savagery ban on a street corner, something in so they can't merged a few ideas of Santa Claus and establish army together, got it so if the Salvation Army is like a in army or military force. What it? What are like? The Navy seals Of those salvation Army That's a good question. Well I imagine it could be the people who are serving the hardest placed his rights. Our lifetimes. In the United States were generally thought of ass, a Parity like people know us for the work we do for the homeless
the hungry, for actual programme for kids there is a certain issued believer. Not there has been passed occasion of salvation is particularly in the early days, but even now I mean there's places where the Savage Army serving in countries where They are not open to the gospel where associations are are often are at times killed, but in the early days there was a group. This you'll think this interesting. I think there was a a counter movement that came up with this option army in England. We started eighteen, sixty five in England, and there was a group that came together. They call themselves the skeleton army they would find. Get me, would come against us in our we'd, have meetings on the street and they often come in, they read, they withdrew nodded stop tomatoes, but often bricks. We have many people who died in the early days of the Salvation Army, so I think those folks who are really put their lives on a line baby. The Navy seals of Salvation Army
Skelton Army. That sounds made up yeah. That's amazing! That's crazy needs me movie, So what happened? The reason that happen is that Then, when the Savage Army would come to town people will stop drinking and people will get worse. And the bars with lose business. The in so it was. The bar owners are pub owners in England who put together these I'll tell him he's a nice actually how we now have as they would come and they would sink while like to command look group. Would come and they would sink while liked you can little group of Salvation Army soldier. Also, what happened is on these skeleton army should come up and they would sing the bar songs louder what an army should come up and they would sing the bar songs louder and you like to be competing, while eventually, a group of guys came to protect this ambition, army and and they started using the brass instruments to play over them said making louder sites. How? having brass bands because of that is in part B. The persecution, No, the drunkards invented heavy metal.
What's your strategy to get louder than heavy metal, that our all right, Recently, there has been a little bit of a controversy with chick fillet of saying that they were gonna. Stop donations to certain organizations. Including Salvation army. Can you give us a little run down on what happened with it? so in November. We wish our me. They are local time tax regimes finding like even just past weekend. Chick for laying in our area Camp of Florida a host a bit Christmas Festival and they have lights in our ban at that and they gave us free chickens which is it is a great thing, but at the corporate level of their foundation, refocused they're, giving areas
hunger part of that, but the histories, then I think people who listened to your pod Cason, follow Babylon, be probably know that there was a bit of a history this, where the aim at a bit of a history this, where the end at I've been one to speak for traditional marriage and dumb, as resulted that there was like up appreciation. Lay appreciation day, and I think a lot of the evangelical community sees them. As somebody who aligns with there. Their vision for the world in their world view in general, all that's cabin at the backdrop of this and then eventually they live. Saved a lot of pressure and then We were at least come over, actually a small area of funding for their foundation. We no longer receive that. By those same time, it seemed to be too many people looking like. They were caving too, the political pressure now, at the same time it I'm not sure certain that that's the case, but it did seem like there came out there stories that they were
supporting other groups out where more in favour of algae BT causes. But what shall awkward in all this, for us is sound Stormy our missions it's a gospel of Jesus Christ, Emmy Human needs in his name without discrimination we we are. Probably the largest provider of services, to pay the algae BT community. I mean that the I have the privilege of serving am and hamper. I mean we know that were serving people who are poor. That community, we local without discrimination, marriage ever time holding a biblical view of marriage. As a denomination, so that the bachelor, what happened? I think some people felt betray weep. Shit whenever chick fillet had done for us in the past and what they do for us on a local level, but it was a little surprising at that had had come up and then It's hard for us is that we end up then, looking like we are anti algae bt like or anti anybody and Access The case is that unfortunate, so algae T person comes up to sell
russian Army to receive help and you don't like chased him off with pitchforks toward the I know an army he began from here yeah that's kind of the impression that that was given. I think most people kept saying. Well chiefly don't it's too Anti algae B to queue organizations, and you know Salvation Army kind of lumped in there. There was a few others should any of those organizations are actually auntie em gb tissue in there in what they actually do. You know you talk about believe, Sir core values or whatever being one thing, the services you actually provide. You know you try to provide everyone. It seems like absolutely to me it is its credit. Finally, I think that the call the gospels to make sure that we are open available to everyone, and we we make that really clear. The ended on the service sidewalk. We want everyone to know that the law-
of Jesus motivate what we do. We don't make the requirement for people to receive give from us at Christmas or receive a meal receives shelter. His aunt Tamper Bay area. We have more than five people that had a place to stay last night because administrators lavish army in globally. You know two hundred thirty one countries were we serve, there's a hunter twenty five thousand people that will stay savagery bed tonight, so all comes because we want to extend the love of Jesus to other people. As a result. What Jesus is done for I saw just like is so clear. That's not the case, and I think that's what other people resonate with within the evangelical community. Is that eight we We are all, of course, are open to serving everybody in and welcome every hour georgian establish armies in a unique position doing that, because not many other churches wants it homeless, shelters in not me. It's just I rehab programmes and that's how guy has directed his Salvation Army to operate
and get some of those frustrating things about all. This is just keeping to the idea that too, completely endorse the algae Bt Q agenda mean hate you I completely endorse it than you bad you hated and right. Two degree with that or eat? It feels like agreeing with that to say that you two to kind of take that stamps So this is our Christmas episode and I would like to know, since your line of work probably provides it angry finish of the interview here, but I would love to hear if you haven't anecdotal heartwarming Chris, the story from merely from the Salvation Army. For us for this Christmas, yeah well up a polar now. I guess I got a couple preparation of my on the spot. Yeah, so I'll tell too quick stories. So there was a young girl, involved in our programme. Thirteen year old girl. She is in it a difficult place, our family, her her. Armed seventh husband,
did not like the fact that she was coming to the Salvation Army and said that if you go back to Salvation Army kicked out this house. The husband army, There are seven had been said that and so on. I said through this girl, and so she asked. Came back Believer Nazis Lavish army, and this is in Import Smith Ohio. So when she came back her bad run on the doorstep for her and she went back to the Salvation Army and thankfully the savage Army officers were their prepare, for an audit the next day and die. She was it I this I army and eventually I was adopted I, though, sadly from answers in that woman is grandmother, Joan Miller, o o school to a city and have no God. I was that woman. I'm gonna be levelled at thirteen year old girl this year. Biased yeah.
So I come out to the exchange into my family that have been involved with this Salvation Army, like ever ass I have four grandparents and three of them, came, to Salvation Army was This story similar that like where they were on the receiving end of established army services sphere, military brat, as they say I guess so Secondly, I have a second Zachary or unwilling will end out the one. It's not as good. How can I get it I was at a similar elzevir, only mild either grandfather, and if you want me, I love it here I was told you can do. He was Joe is correct. Give us gotta be serious, so their eyes in Kansas City Missouri in it. Pressure. There is a kid aid. He got enough despite improved established army building, his name was cotton, and he, u, guy in trouble, the police officer. I please african and broke defied up and took cotton into the
savage army to see the captain. There is an image captain, Jacob Cox, and he took him in and out he said: can you do some of those Katie's banana trouble for so much? We don't want to do with them, and so he said if you com this irish army further, six sundays and come the Sunday school I'll, give you a corner, I could trumpet inside and will let you being our ban. It was first time that he'd ever been offered anything in, so he took him up on the offer and he came back and eat. Where's my corner. After six weeks any joined to ban any became a salvation army the sir and eventually was leading the savage armies disaster work in Chicago. When he retired- and he got a point, the from the old mare daily, and he saw he said this all started with a coronet and That's really kind of what this irish army does is that we offer people. Maybe it's a cold water or maybe a meal ml, is a maybe it shelter, maybe, it is a safe place to be after school but or off
people, though those have thanks in here's a low punchline? Oh no, you not come at that. Guy cotton was grandfather. Man's name was Barack Obama has either as her lot of similarities to the story about corn pop the other was a foreign I try. I was waiting for the corn popular. There is no doubt that they do. A theory. Legs are being urged me to leave aside kick named Youtube Sir, just keep going so if people would like to if people are feeling a Christmas spirit rising up in their hearts, their heart is growing. Three sizes are on earth and they're, looking and seeing other kids seeing about Christmas and their there heart of ice is melting. Where can work ethic? and they go to support This omission armies efforts, while you're probably is
if this is come out before Christmas. You'll probably see our red kettles and fire Wall March in various grocery stores and malls all over, but you can go to Salvation Army, USA, DOT org. And you can make a gift. There are eighty four sense of every dollar goes directly to programmes in services for establish army nationally. That's up that were able to say in so. Why are they happens is savage. Armies mission is always localised, and so we serve and every zip code in America and what we do Tampa might be different from what we do in Chicago based, Parliament needs that community by our mission to preach the gospel Jesus Christ, Emmy Human needs in his name, without discrimination, adapt community he saw someplace, you will have a family well, there's some single many women, shelter, some rehab programme, some new services, some senior services and everywhere that is made many people might not know. They said the disarming the church so on the past, or establish army church and dumb ass result of of like the work that we do everywhere. This irish army is there is a local congregation
mission guiding those services. Some Amy I about here to find out unity to give back and allow people know savaged army during Christmas time, but we're sorry people three hundred sixty five days here. No thanks again work Thick for your servants, yet thank you, don't you think you this down so that he just says salvation: Army hate, gay people better Thank you dances. Yes, I think so much are joining us. We appreciate the ethics have anyway the boundaries- the Moluccas, Christmas, correct. This is the Christmas special can't. You see the fire, that's a here and I'm using a week, Christmas holiday, a pagan holiday, taking all repackage utterly nor that stuff of disorder
Ok, so Christmas, so we have a lot of stuff here Christmas. So we're gonna. Do that we're, starting with the debate and the The question in this big debate is trying to answer. Is Santa Claus Easy, real, real or hoax invented by Satan and too in order to see good Santa or is he a evil centre. Is that within the scope of this debate, Maybe if we go there, we go there for the pro Santa side we have here with us this evening. Scholar nothin, you call Actually, when he was William Lane, Ringle deserted not now dismayed and William late Crinkle, and for the Anti Santa side. Yes, Michael Satan, Satan, they wouldn't have to sand it. No one basic Satan we are playing
Sir Richard Screwed, MC darkens, Musket Security, MC documents. As you can tell me in the stuff we were talking at around twenty one time. I didn't hear it right. So Dan is gonna, be the moderators you like it or not. The introduce us yeah. So we have Scrooge MC darkens taking the. Hi Santa side, and we have William laying crinkle fender of the faith here and the rules are that you have thirty seconds to put forth an argument for your position and then there will be. Fifteen second time, for a rebuttal, I'm. Abide by those rules. I will meet you well. I, with with respect to my my approach, here. I guess I'll begin with the column, could chimney illogical argument, one whatever comes down. The chimney must be a magical, be Santa.
Down the chimney? Therefore Santa Claus is a magical being objection you rebuttal, oh but off, then we're not in Court Santa not be good because of children? It gets if children get toys. We know this. That does not get toys but gives them there is no record of Santa ever receiving toys. Therefore he cannot. A good Santa good sir, If Santer is the one in order for it, is to be given. There has to be a toy giver objection. It is not your floor. Carry my way May I respond to this, sir I'll all allow it For toys to be given, there has to be a toy giver by Definition centre
buzz is a toy giver, not a toy receiver. Another another argument, though do not see Santa. We see the effects of Santa, for instance, oh my cookies again may I respond go for. Thank you like drop. May I have the floor. We ve seen the debate. Would you preaching here is a centre of the gaps quote, slash unquote. You must see that gap in your chimney and that Santa must fit nicely inside of it rather than letting science find the true explanation good sir! I can't answer all the questions of life. Also, you and science how about some hard evidence, the writer of Santa come to town was
to renounce Santa, but he chose to be murdered in pale and a candy came the war on Christmas. So why He would endure that if you didn't believe exactly what he wrote preposterous, You just believe in Santa It is reading, because you can't handle the cold hard reality that The thing is meaningless. Arisen, pure chance. So you create this imaginary sleigh, daddy, laid out in the sky. Sleigh daddy and the scale of the IRA of these in Kyle's just reading them- and I know what you're getting at you could write. You gotta tell ya with Chris. Carols contain hundreds of I testimonies and ngos add to that. I forgot to boom, but might drop it better.
Hell. Yes, I'm gonna, take your Santa. What I was being better go enough. Gonna nail data has been better because they allowed us to about them. The things I've done in the democratic debates like the big might drop me. Ask you spartacus like I was a little girl yeah like to see her thing about, Oh, if you could get a gretta to come out here,. My child here says that stand is not real and, although my dreams at my ease I'll, do you have children so If Santa Israel, he is the kind of Santa that I would want to celebrate forcing victims of growth deficiency too slow
For him here, somebody else elevator to slave for him, you around Eatin warmed ears. I should add that eating free cookies and constantly shouting at words that denigrate women, so that ho ho ho careful watch. Your mouth. Ok are ok. With me on this one. This is Rudolf Wager to classical argument for the existence of Santa. If you believe in San any does not exist, you share the same fate as those who do not believe in Santa. Absolute misery or if Santa does exist, you standing toys, candy stockings overflowing, While the unbelievers still faces nothing but humbug So the believer in Santa technically has nothing to lose. In all to gain, while this ended denier, whether right or not, only face a cold and bitter joyless winter. It is only now you called a wager on the choice they may. The most sense Santos. The real sir. I moved it that stricken from the record, your
I'm gonna give. I give my opponent the final word. If you were born in Yugoslavia, you would, believe in Santa you would believe in the European Pine vote. Of torment us all this lobby and children do both my drop Santa destroyed in one shot. If you were born in Yugoslavia, you'd also believe in the EU, the eurasian pine bowl of torment as well so I thought I got the last word in your good tyres. Are him, sir? It's embarrassing himself I think the results are definitive here. You can you can enter your own results in our app. And with you in the audience right now, nightcap, let's all vote the other day, moderator who won this one to the pro Santa position bias bias. I heard the
and works foresee in his victory, music or something you so I think that our one Santa Cruz, They settled in favour of the Anti Santa side. Go ahead and move on: let's do your top five Christmas movies about that care, we're going. I have three four two younger, Leonardo, fine, I'll, read mine. You read yours, then I'll, reminding you re yours and then all remain. You always and ridicule each other, and we can comment on each other's w. We stole this format from a pot, Guess called the Dice Tower, which is a board game. Punkahs, don't do what was that noise? This is possibly a cheerful, happy and pathetic. Number five are my number five top Christmas movie is die hard Zat on your list somewhere. So my little girl, you have to tell me
thing number five number five dire really our time brings in order better image end jingle all the way with an Arnold, a grey so good, he punches, arrange your face. Is that the one where he gets the toy for asking in Sinbad in there's like that, action is just like a great like it's from like the era of like home alone, where people getting punched involving down a lot was a surly pop, there is a and so like it. Two click the action Movie Arnold and made into a Christmas movie by trying to toy A point is the reindeer in the face of the best part, I thought that one is a classic and it was he drunk or the Rangers drunk. I remember somebody Mister number four but number before is a rude off the red nose. Ranger. That's a movie the classic, stop motion television, reckon Bass but was like lung cancer movie well
what kind of an event rights it would come on tv animals. Let's go watch that it was a room. It was a programme probably, but if you look back on a now, it's really bad. But I think that's I think. That's endearing about that kind of stuff like that. Excellent broken when you talk like their necks swaying weirdly in their health or like falling off. I think it's, You know I like the silver and gold guy. That's my report all that sir, whose again so there's no anyway force, His name is borough lives before even minds. Gremlins. Have you seen him and you know I watched my half of it but didn't finish gremlins and its deadly criticism, because Gremlins are attacking Santer in one part of it it's just a guy, just the sentiment in theirs stuff, like the mom it can, after these very weird eighties tipster. So it is an accurate ass. Great,
it's fun insulting saint. I like anybody, rake restrain to kill them, choose little creatures, Chris, there's all the knockoffs anything where a lot of people dying, really yeah. Ok, There are three number three number three for me is all alone. Put die hard for number three out there, so my home alone choice, my kids are watching it now and then through all the home alone. Movies already- and I dare to was our fourth- it did let's get the Miller forth, but only start adding ones and other kids intimate stuff in a humble on three was indifferent kid We just watch the new Rambo movie ramble, that's basically home alone for adult, so you think about it: kind of home alone for adults not really didn't set traps NEA. Definitely more ramble, ass, plovers home alone for but when he like, lowers the dead terrorist down with like the hollow hone. I have a machine gun sign on him. Everything
that feels more like some Kevin Mcallister, or do you just Oh like there's, no there's no purpose to that used to be like Anyone who alone is a classic yeah and you number three was diehard. Your homeland was all filmed in high school found. In all the interior shots. They rebuilt all the house and like everything inside of a high school gymnasium,. You watch the new showing netflix about the movies that made us than one and a large, and also home alone was made for, like a really low, my money for the times at fourteen million or something, and it mainly resilience crazy. This was very little in the movie thing in earnest but home alone, or that they bring up and their leader? I don't know he noticed, but the set designer meat, everything, red and green, like the entire set, every single thing, phones, red or green, like the wallpapers, all rendering such pure Christmas movie, absolutely please it is obviously just move element. Is that detailed it everything's ridden green in the house. It was
to buy a crystal unless writing guided. The first couple here now is like his first big movie now, and you could tell us got that child like really focused on children, which this first few Harry Potter movies were too ok we're moving onto an advertisement of ever to number two? My number two is it's Christmas time again, Charlie Brown. This is not the class the favoured that everybody loves the first Christmas special this is these equal? Does this evil and the reason it's my favorite, because when we had a vs rohingya, What's when over and over my favorite part is one of the cared who is it some minimised? the sub, Charlie Brown, sister. Telling the were freckles like Charlie Brown eyes I dont, never knew any other names you now, by Linus PIG Pen, one among goes up in her. She supposed to say our hark. It's. Our only line against practicing at the whole time hark heart, hearkened, but the whole time Its Charlie Brown is holding area. I miss in this.
Really by one of the characters, is holding a hockey stick and socially. Up in stating Chagos Hockey Stick and it's like soup Dr did pan and I was just loved her. So anyway, that's Maya S chamber timber, to which you number two Whenever too, maybe she'll be number one, I left number one blank. I really wanted to put other still time to change a man, but Gonna save for a Christmas story watch every single year. I know how do people it's like a crocheted watch every year and, like some people, think it's overrated, I'd soothing. It's amazing, hilarious! a unique great movie, never seen what you kidding Emerson, unacceptable, so good It's not you wanna hear struck me as on others, films, it everybody loved growing up, but it probably I watched It's a little meandering like it's just it there's nothing, it does. The storyline does meander, but it's just very it's very slice of life, but it's from a time when I was a kid it's it's,
It is always funny candid tidbits from like the Bali in I don't know, you say you'd out all the movies that people tell me from that area like this. You have to washes its just like there's almost no. I, like it's, just a slice, a lifetime, My wife- and I would like to see really wants this be begun but what I would say it's one of the greatest Christmas movies ever made, not put it on the list and now the moment you ve been waiting for number one number one, has never never under thy ever saw those Santa Claus movies it it's a great concept, it's one of those I was never never unrove. I ever saw those Santa Claus movies it it's a great concept. It's one of those things that you could like pitch to Hollywood. Studio B, like Santa Claus dies and this random guy has to take over, and I got a cigarette, Concept that cuz, I don't have a list but always love. It's been a long time. I sought earnest said so no incentives we just washed away their kids in its day. I haven't seen a lot of our elected palazzo.
An earnest movies following We just washed away their kids and it stands up in there even though he had a wife setting any. I put my number one home alone ideas. I just watched with my kids in it so that it holds. Even though he had a wife setting any, I put my number one home alone, I do I just watched with my kids and so get it holds up, my five year old, loved, respectable choice. I mean kids get the people, her kids love them, and then it is the ties in with the holiday Spirit, Sola and when you watch it later desire, I remembered it as a in all, remember it's all the funny physical gags That doesn't come in so, like the last twenty minutes of the movie, we act You watch it s really like. Well, that's just the finale, but it's gotta it's got a strong plot. Like yeah, a single directive loathing the the police officer in the beginning. You know in any area at you see him come in as the robber near like in order to build up to it didn't more satisfying winning Sargon bashed as great as is the key
the change of healthy animals out it's a gap that movie hip to Chechnya, which they just made the movie for that area. I add a couple run. Up to now. You'll leave the weapon is technically technocracy, discriminatory, it's wonderful life, It's good, it is a good movie- is added cried offers to my son is for actually seeing as watching with Doug Tables family for the first time, and it was on New year's eve- we watched it if you know in the movie, like there's a point where there are watching the clock, hits midnight in the gets a bid. The big moment of the finale like art, I keep midnight uneasy right. The very moment that midnight in a movie, and we heard the whole body at the old neighbour Sarge cheering and like fire two going off. Is I'm watching it's a wonderful life? It's weird: that's why crazy, and then really from movie. Also little are rated, though love actually super. Sammy romance Movie from England, butter scrape.
My only runners up would be like the Grinch cartoon. I love that one, Let him carry Grinch did not care for it. I'm always liked it. Now when I recently was launched, as it is really weird seen a human and that costume tournament, camera angles? Real funny, like their alternative, is willing zoom in diagnosing gathered in that weird nineties? Ninety nine others nineties, but it was definitely ninety feel, and I am was founded Oh yeah, during that time, where we make everything, make those super hyper realistic version of all these things, it never were meant to be. I was his bad at over those other wanted their cabin a hat one. Captain Ratlin Michael Myers Ricky. Why anyway, for you to watch some some Christmas movies this year, you can't do I mean weight you could do worse than those films. We just listen. Even if you watched, I heard my no and I always in the room for there, but it's definitely a Christmas slowly,
ok, so we have something very fun planned. We have some listener submitted stories now, so we ve been scheme for the past couple. Episodes for listeners descended stewards greenery most of them here and there were saved some juicy ones for our subscriber segment right. So let's do it story time. That is absolutely essential. You said you had one you wanted to read. First, Ethan is no! No, no, she said you had one you. There is just one word I sent in to and I just picked one. Oh yes, I do the first one. I tried shortens first one up there's, certainly any back as we discussed. We did just talk about the Grinch, so they can read it over them all verbatim, but will I will summarize, when care applicable here, want to take this one. As part of a children's Sermonic Christmas Eve. This is from Jim Jack by the way
yeah. I, like others to asian Jack and Rob that's typos. I dressed in a grin costume and hid behind the door leading into the sanctuary my wife, his teaching children sitting by the altar that Christmas is not about things, but about Jesus rank I stood there now behind the door. With the Grinch theme song playing proceeded steel, each item by putting them in a large SEC, so he exe stealing items from the children. Putting this that's Turkey doesn't say what things they are. What encountered, one, not what I Count on was one my costume scared, a three year old who scream as to the service at times. My feeling that the human dressed as the branches pre terrifying, rang the Big Harry Green person naked. Grown naked man is Harry. Is our Gary and making green you're making me as this area than it needs to be the rubber. Ass. I was wearing caused me to sweat and made my glasses fog upset. I couldn't see out of the tiny isolates,
and I was unable to see or unable to see swaggered down the aisle. My swing, bag of stolen Christmas items, whack the glass candle chimney, sending it shattering under the aisle, so it sounds like you're. Just a big mess with the Grinch costume always think my pastor four do weird stuff during the servants I'm an address of a super man, I'm gonna get wielded chainsaw. I was simple, at some point. They need to look in the mirror and be like this I went to seminary for yes, who I am now in this crisis, telling us today no insulting to Jim Jack, but that has always Hawaii under the new dimension here later that the three year old, when they were older, he said the picture of him as the Grinch into something here, while hunting them so he's kind of a psycho here's a special store. This is from my mom from Kyle that no Kyle's Mama. And so my
She says my husband, your Dan, my dad filled, my starting with a giant bag of generic of generic Q tips. He's not name brand generic. He said that it feels space sufficiently. It doesn't cost very much money. I clean ears for years, funny like? I still do that anonymous, an honest gift I studied, like all of you, get your wife like a giant ersatz or something you can wait Fill up a lot of other socks. People out like a big, are big bag of popcorn, or you know that feels that most of the stocking now looks for its efficient, so and ass. She says one. You re, he also gutter, flexible, wipes, big pack, flexible wipes, but adds the greatest of stockings to Regos, so he got her flexible apes so my Christmas on what it does every present, contains message so the first one is critical
in her ear hygiene and the second one I really want to explore with have yet been that's what he's he doesn't about he's an engineer things about. I'm feeling this is our efficient. These are efficient. Package's little up the space very efficiently people, people most Mohammed, Ok, so, let's move on, thank you for listening. Story when he didn't say dad, but he getting rather flexible he's out there. Just ass. He thought there were just like for cleaning up the car, something ok which he wasn't using. Even then I the garbage. I don't know that still saves you like you too are the same. The cars dirtier he does tat, they were wipes, is like white. Anything on one all purpose, interesting. I want you to the words Jesus one and on didn't hooker. Kathryn Brian, in its in quotes for some reason. I know a Brien is and quotes when I was a kid
When you're my church was taking a special offering on Christmas Backslash Christmas Eve, we were didn't we sat down and they are right in the middle of the stage is a major with an offering play Instead of baby Jesus, we promptly got walked out not attending that year and on the stage so a process that is in a place of babies are friendly but worried. I just use the whole major. He felt more cash in that way. Through the operator You think so he decided there, they were busy. May they got a phone call. They were the businesses understanding things really year, starting special, offering so tat. They were doing the special off. Ok, everybody come forward and put your given the major ease ass at his hands out, have word I hears a short one. Paul Cox. Nepal draws ref tunes which are like reformation comics and you'll, derelict or a quote from Spurgeon in Cuba,
two new version of checks, version and stuff pretty good wearily com Spurgeon that sounds like you, like friends, mean Chuckie he'll checks, I just realized. Recently there must be a long. Complex burden is called the spur. Like you, Charles Charles nickname form, so Paul says that his and he was so excited to start Christmas that they put the trip November first and then, as it's really early, it sounds like as gifts give boxes were Doping and ornament shattered on the floor and there's pine needles everywhere they got sick of it and they down by December two years? Give boxes opened that awaiting opening presents, I is he says, boxes were torn and dislike. Will my kids you mainly because they have a longer there? There are the more opportunity, my three or I will just go up and opens yeah. They do not understand how things are the pressure of Christmas season link little kids like it does. Makes sense. Why would you leave all these toys wrapped up in that spot in the room stare at four, a math,
this kind of tortures, but it's a good value delay. Why should I have now learn to appreciate its second be anticipation, Maria and in all our peoples intense for kids. What again here's the thing about people like all your Christmas is about consumerism now getting guns, but I kind of- the element where it's like you're waiting for something yeah? really captures living with a Christmas season is really about were anticipating we're we're Israel's anticipating the Messiah in this kind of that I know it's Saturday. It's not the same right because in it's like unintended, sixty four is not as good as Jesus, but at the same time kind of its small shadow and also like what you, what people expected visas to be it didn't, come out to be exactly like the eggs like a big cyborg guide that kill everybody was amazing, but it act. Sites like on Christmas, like you think, you're gonna get liquor brilliant and oh, but you get like socks nook in its different You get some even better yeah the thought, you're more important, a better for you.
So a ruin, your analogy, I know well That was not a good Jesus. Is the socks of your life he's like the big sick, woolly socks that are going to get you through winter and you won't get frostbite and you won't have to have your feet lopped off and it's much better than the Super Nintendo can't do anything for prospect. Do we save it? I think you're still telling your story. Sorry, no, with upholsterer he said something about like a alibi, Eritrea or something. That's all a yeah and then these as they set up analogy, something which again next This one from Alan Boon sounds like it sounds like you that walked Oregon trailer, something explore. I grew up in this super fundamentalist, church and every year the pasture would tell all the kids at Santa doesn't exist for the pulpit during service who just go. Their Santa does not exist. Santa does not exist, imagine being like foghorn leghorn.
My mom also taught preschool at the school run by that church in her students would get in fights like literally fiscal, it's over. Whether Santer was real, one could get because he told another kid that his grandfather shot sent up his roof. That previous Christmas you're getting debates about Santa kid. He told them get the magic. I believe it he's real. You still are the believer. That's true. I like that, a kid. Told another kid that his grandfather shots. If that's like all those my dad's better than your dad, urging you to get the symbolic Oryx Nintendo, my dad shouted my grandfather shot Santa Sir. They arguing that Santa doesn't exist now, because my dad shot him more than he does exist. Proof is that you have arrived late autumn. How does that did he die or did he absorbed the bulletin and Fire United Kingdom conservative magic? So the skids like on the present societies, I guess Headed- does exist, manage, but my grandfather shot I want to know the rest that story we should
I got a write to us, Alan Boone, Helen. Whoever was talking about that We need an interview him when you get back from your explorations with Lewis and Clark, please tell us and the EU trade earlier pelts and after all, have been treated in and the dusty trails have been. Dusted destiny There's an Ex story actually said Israel sent in by Marlene Ferguson, our youngest. MS three in his dad was determined. He would understand Santa wasn't real, but Jesus was you gonna hadn't, gave him the talk. The talk, turns out here to this room son. I have to talk to you and tat at had been earshot of your younger siblings. A sport. You got a minute later they are talking to them all with me above us was a helicopter and a big to descend into the parking lot out came Santa saying HO ho HO,
my son stood there with his job of watching sector or into the more he turned and said well, dad. She was wrong. Wasn't he is pre. Conquering was sent in a helicopter. Do we want he had his else, build it. That's the thing like the amount of things at Santa can build. It's amazing that he always narrowed down to just wouldn't trains and stuff. Toys that nobody wants and all of the depictions. It's like here's, a YO, yo yeah, here's a law top Such are the worst told it get. How work as people want like a nintendo to Santa build a nintendo, or does it go by one is allowed to do? Is a slave driver yet, but they didn't actually, Lebanon tendons. Why not? because only Nintendo has the right of copyright and how he can like form into a small like club. Of glitter in Sudan down a chimney and all this but you're struggling with him building a nintendo. It doesn't make sense. I tell you Sir Sir, we know about Jack
I will when we save the rest of our stories that we have more are subscribers. If you do he's stories. No you're in one nuclear and related stories. I don't think so. You're, not sure how can you be sure, we'll guys it is in our Christmas episode beside. It means you know little except where the best stuff, which is going to be in the scrapper portion. Let's must have, We just wanted to say that it's the end of the year and it is a huge year for the Babylon Bee has crazy. We launched our podcast over the summer. In its doing Well, and you guys are making it happen one taking legal action, you guys are making them. So yeah always amazed when I look at the Itunes and like and this many,
People chose to take time another day and review soon ice cold. Remember everybody! Jesus is the reason. Is the a Christmas, Merry Christmas enjoy family, enjoy your cookies. Enjoys enjoy the concept of Santa Claus. This, yes,. We think we should talk about in these drivers to about whether or not you should teach our children, the San Israel, look at some people repeating that that that's controversial Burke Insurers Savior, The spicy controversial stuff go to battle. Meta conflict plants in my question life stories and Asians personal life stories and paid subscribers. Bonus content, every single we and no ads and other benefits. You know fun, so in the Spirit of the holiday. Here's some crass commercialism by our product Please drop your money in the offing plate which is in place in maybe he's us
you're money in the major on the web. I'll talk to you guys after the new year? Probably I think, ho ho ho I would like to thank says Dylan for paying bills Adam forward for creating their job, the other writers for tirelessly pitching headlines subscribers and you the listener until next time. This is Davy, Andrea. The voice of the battle on be reminding you to go forth and watch diehard by our warm cosy fire
Transcript generated on 2019-12-25.