Hey listeners Erin here and I'm curious. Have you ever ask yourself what you would do if you are trafficked into a cult or were shot nine times? What, if you were the only survivor of a car crash or went into minor surgery and woke up one week later paralyzed? What would you do this is actually happening? Is podcast from wondering that brings an extraordinary who stories of life changing events told by the people who lived them in their new season. You hear the kinds of stories that sound, like the plots of hollywood movies stories about conflict turmoil or threats that dramatically altered. course of someone's life from a young man that dooms his entire future family, with one choice to a woman who was, her father murder. Her mother, this is actually happening, gives you the first person account of what happened and how they overcame remarkable circumstances. I'm about to play you a preview of this is actually happening. Why

listening fellow this is actually happening on amazon music. Wherever you get your pop or you can listen ad free by joining wondering plus in the one, yep my husband and I were in bed and he was reading, and I got to sleep, mrs ninety, ninety six now and it was as if extract shop, went through my body and my body had a spasm salary. Wake me up, because, oh my god, oh my god, I you know, I think you just had a seizure or something- and I said No- something happened, but I I think I'm okay, I'm okay, we'll call the doctor and we'll talk tomorrow and let me just go back to sleep, so we called the doctor and the times I don't think it was a seizure, but I think you should get an mri just to see so we,

schedule, an mri and larry and I went in and what the doc discovered was that there was no residue of a seizure but that very high up on my spine. There was a tumor that was inside my spinal cord that was blocking about sixty percent of the court, so we met with a surgeon he said. Well, we cannot do a biopsy on this tumor cause it's inside your court, but the more blocks your spine, the more electrical disruption that will happen and if it is cancer,

it will probably get like spider like legs break through the spine and strangle the spot. So the best solution really is not to wait and remove the tumor at sea, two in the spy and you'll be in the hospital three or four days and you'll have a sore neck for a month. So we scheduled the surgery by this point. In my life I had stopped dancing, but I had been a marathon runner, so I was very physic we fit, and I remember the night before surgery. I just ran five miles because I was nervous and I thought well, let's be a good way to deal with some of the nerves. Once I agreed that I thought the surgery was a path for I wanted to know nothing else. I wanted to just be under the framework that I'd be in the hospital for three or four days with a sore neck for a month and then I'd be back at work and my life would continue as it was

They put the ivy in that within put me out, and they said it rolling the stretcher, ass larry was only man I remember seeing the the ceiling lights. I don't remember anything else. Larry told me. That is, I think it was about. Six hours later the surgeon came out and said: okay, I'm done they're, just cleaning them up and you'll be able to see him in a little bit. Everything was fine during the surgery. I don't expect any complications. He then waited like an hour or so, and then he went up to nurses and said the surgeon said I would be able to see John can I go see him and the nurses? Oh my god. I guess

you didn't tell you what happened, I'm so sorry come back. The cage was still screwed into my skull. I was covered up still blood blood and he said I was screaming was I was like a like caged torture, animals. I woke up daily. I had so many drugs in me. I was pollution eating I couldn't talk. I couldn't comprehend what had happened, and

it's realizing that, like I couldn't move anything nothing I would be in this kind of chaotic state. Having no connection to my body- and all I had was like my brain at this point and I was on all of these shrugs and stuff- sometimes those first mornings. I would look at the window and just think is there any way I can just get to that window and smash my head against the glass and cut my throat. I couldn't move anything, so it really was. Only stuck with that fantasy of liberation. But someone who had been a dancer, phelan who'd been a marathon runner who led

fully embodied life to be in the hospital quadriplegic. They have completely lost Torah control. Your body was in common, annabelle? Because it was so inconceivable to me that I was stuck in this body that could not move. I couldn't, will any ocean whatsoever as first weeks were so Heart because I was so used to as a dancer learning something making it better change, it fixing it always being adaptive resilience and that, in practice,. I was able to be better the same thing as a marathon wrong did six marathons Paul was fine tuning and trying to prove Always seen the horizon ahead, the complete for me that hospital is that there wasn't a horizon. I was

stuck in the now of nothing you ve just heard. A preview of this is actually happening to hear the rested. This episode followed. This is actually happening wherever you get your podcast.