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Bonus episode: Tony’s #1 strategy for decision-making | Tony tells Ray Dalio how he makes the best choice – every time

2017-11-29 | 🔗

In this final part of the conversation between Tony and investing legend Ray Dalio, the tables are turned. This time, it’s Ray asking Tony about his guiding principles in life. What values drive Tony’s actions and behavior. What his ultimate mission in life is. And why he believes that your ability to make decisions is the single most important element for success.

This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
Welcome back to the Tony Robins podcast, I'm in New York editorial director for ovens. Research international in this Final part of the conversation between Tony and investing legend Re Dalia, the tables are turned this. Its re asking Tony about his guiding principles in life. What values DR his actions and behaviour ultimate mission in life is and why he will if the Arabella even make decisions, is the single most important element for success.
So once again shares tony Robins and Re Dalia Toy. I'm so excited about the fact that that I'm gonna learn something about your principles, because you know we agree that one of the most important gifts that anybody can give each other or give the world is those principles. So people can compare it s, and I think that you pay more attention to principles and almost anybody that I know we look up is regretted that better principles and it's very important to be clear on those, but before we get to the principles which the values that are behind them. Examples are the most important that I gave you. So I'm curious today. What are you going after? What are you value most? Why are you doing this? I'm I've always been driven by love em. I love people. I love life, but I impact is what I'm after is how can I have more impact? I've been obsessed with it, my entire life. How can I
They came out of the factory that I grew up in a pretty tough, Armando, absolutely love me the oldest three, but she was crazy. She used our call to the extreme and she's Prescription drugs and then those states she was very abusive, she's mash, my head against the wall, tat blood. I never talked about this to one day. I was actually with a group of young kids who are all views, and I tried to tell him you're not defined by your past, your biographies, not your destiny. I can see in this tall white guys doing well financially. That really can relates. I told middle story, my mom point liquid soaked out my throat type trucks that I was lying when I wasn't and when the person you love most is trying to hurt you, and yet you know they love you too. It's quite a twisting your head. So the suffering made me what I hate suffering I want to live. Everybody up, I possibly can it's never gone away, and but it also made me a practical psychologist. I have time to analyze her entire past. I forgot what are triggers were I to figure out what per needs were had a figure managers, my brother and sister didn't get her, and so
if I had, if my mom man within the mother I wanted, I wouldn't be the man I'm proud to be. I developed those skills really early on primarily to forgot, to monitor and then gradually I could help other people, because I had to me somebody challenging things. I learn from you that the thing that one goes after in life- yes, is You say in your words that were it's the reflection of what was it the thing that
didn't have time she often what you're, driven by as what was missing right where you hunger for as what was missing. If I have deep appreciation of all the options and freedoms I have in this life today, because I didn't have those growing up, and so I never take it for granted. If everything is given to you. Obviously you know you know hunger for that hunger for something else. So I think early on, I really just wanted safety and security for those I loved. I grew up in a very poor environment financially, and I thought all my my mom was married for different men and she always talked about how they couldn't sport or family, no money for food and the reason I feed feed a billion people have had three hundred million. The last three years alone is because somebody thought my family when, as eleven
so I know what that feels like. I know that give me hope. I know it wasn't. The food was the fact that the strangers care, and so I'm I swear. I was going to do that for others. I was eleven when this happened. So when I was seventeen at the two families in for than a million people in and now it's a hundred million people here, so people have problems. We all do subconsciously, knowing what makes us tick, because it's hello are conscious mind. What is the universal principle that you might give along those lines? Is it that that thing that you're missing at your childhood? What is it that is mostly a good what good key to what might be the thing that is, are each of our subconscious, we'll give us one. I know none of them is one of the report. I think that the court is our model.
You know we're born wide open, you can be anything is a child right. You can scream yell, throw your stuff go about. Their passengers took up. Try try that when you're thirty say the worse for you right, but as time goes by, you know, you learn that you have to be a certain way in order to have that significance not live to love to survive. A baby has to be physically lapped, otherwise we get what called failure to thrive syndrome. So we learn how to adapt. We learn either by what someone does explicitly or implicitly we make it up, and we learned that it's not so wide open I gotta be some people are taught you have to be the best you have to be smart or you have to always mind or or some people find do you know that they can be anything so they get really angry when you're growing up the source of love. I was asked people this question, we love. Did you crave the most growing up you felt area, though, and then I find out who was a free of who grave is love under you loved them both whose loves you create the most, your mother, nothing, my dad,
and was a little more scarce. Yes, yes, which is why you created, and so could you have to be for your father? Tat has respect and ok, so there you go in with it with their very survival. Ok, so I had to be strong. I mustn't shootings right I'd be successful unless we also have to be, I don't know I had to have good character, you have those three things even today I strive for, if you do so, you just did what I asked you to do. Is you gave the formula facets? once the formulas now: here's the peace for everybody you get what a beautiful am I right in here right now? Yes, if anybody takes what is theirs and answers to those questions, they're going to learn something about what is motivating them and why and that Poland and freedom to start to update the ok, because otherwise you're running somebody else's life still and you don't even realize you ve been doing it for so many years. Maybe it's time to open up I am very proud of my mother was a source for me is
Crazy is a wise. I still wonder the most. I would do anything for die for a crate, for I became all these things are now to be successfully to be smart. Be quiet about how to find the answers. I think All those things up later I added other choices to my life, so wasn't only that I'm really grateful for the things that came out of there, but you have to understand what for you and then you have to decide whether you want today, because otherwise you're just a condition, be right. That's why I started with what do you want? Yes, ok, because your values are going to be the things that will determine the principles they need. To change that right. So now I know what you want. You want have impact you wanted to change people's lives and we want to make them less miserable cinema. You want to possible right. Ok,
How do you now, as in the strategies to real so the principles that you need, are the ones that are going to make that happen? One or two things that unique about you is that you are not just thinking about your own principles to make those things happen. You have had so much contact with different people who have all different kinds of lives and it go and after all different things- and you are thinking what are the principles that they should have, regardless of necessarily what they're going to have also joined requires the best principles. Those who fear it out because used to learn by your own experience, what you and I both know, is quite painful and and can very slow or you can learn to learn by other people's experiencing oppressed decades in today. So you know when I wrote my master the game, that's how Universe Matt! I know you'd listen my stuff before, but I knew you were never met you. It was because I wanted to get your principles and you are so cartoons gimme the principles. Uk minister, did you built out of those principles you now. So what about that? We're talking to you. Ok, so now tell me: what are your principles that you think are most valuable
gosh. I have something I regard as I have the same, but if you know what I'm saying life life I'd say the most, thing: it's me as lovers everything I believe every day If I want to be a blessing in life of anybody, I mean I know it sounds corny, but it's really true for me and what that means to me is: how can I help like I blue principles need habits, they need rituals or they need systems or news algorithms and order Mitchell. Principles, replied, otherwise are just lofty belief systems that you throw up on the wall. I want to measure it. I want to see what's really there and so for me, I'm always permit. I don't mean to interrupt. I'm gonna note the measure you gotta against Iraq and I want you to say by bottom operates, but when I'm looking audience like it, the questioner has just how can help, and it gives me such joy to help I know what the fills me I was to be one of my most important principles is how do you extraordinary life which, to me is life on your terms is not my terms for my life, it's my terms like
what what do you really want and then what does it take? And I think it takes two principles to skills demand one. Is the science of achievement? How do you take what you and vision get real, there's a whole series of principles in that area right. Fundamentally, the first one is just obsessive focus and mean: if you put your focus refocused, goes energy flows. If you be obsessive you desire in Hungary? It's amazing what your brain can do, but then you also need to take massive f. An someone's thinkings enough. You can just attract things, now we are now about to have been execution, and so how do you get they're. Well, you try anything and change your approach or you can model those that have already done it and learn quicker and save yourself time, and I think the third principle that was his grace which some people got work, some people call God I think, recognising there's more than you and of acknowledging that your lecture, anybody about their spiritual outside the lifeboat, the more grace, we'd knowledge? I think the more we find more experts. Then there is the master skill of the art of film
I call on all because it's a science and making money you know about their principles. You follow them fulfilments different. What the bills re dahlia would fulfils even barbary, wife with fulfils your job. My fulfils your friends could be different in many different ways, but you gotta know what fulfil and while it's you meet for everybody, bastard my dear friend and shows me this painting a page. Eighty seven billion dollars for its Roscoe is due to the red sky. Specific eighty, seven million economic environment, because I don't have an investigation knows with every stroke busy tells me now. You know the story. He committed. Suicide is a bitter abuse, blood rabies. But It's him up everybody's. Lit up by something different, but ultimately you gotta grow or you're, not gonna be There are still people who one key to happiness. Is progress, progress perhaps if you don't grow you're, not have you no matter how much you earn, how many people lovingly beautiful kid you and then we grow something to give the reason you wrote this book three
What you're doing at the stage of your life right now send me as you ve figured out. There's only so much joy can have within yourself and how much love or joint your shoulder whenever it is women. Most of us will all be selfish moments, but if the beauty, human beings is when they have a great experience. The first thing you share with somebody they love and that to me makes me proud to be human and so getting people to grow and getting people to contribute, so they feel fulfil not just achieving what's much more, I told me with much more aware than a billion under very rare. As you well know, this five new ones is near the shore up here you know about every month now. Bottom line is somebody who's happy every damn day when it doesn't go there way, somebody's refilled somebody use finds a way to serve, and so those are principles for me but you weren't principles, my region, teacher, Jim around. You know for these. About, I gotta get better from needs to change. I gotta changing that focus. Simplistic is on a hundred percent responsibility, but my whole life is principles its finding people, the best find
and symbols and using those shortcut to help people to get what they really want to go. That's really what my focuses. I was trying to count the number of principles that huge gave me. I guess I was that something like twenty two twenty three and their right and IRAN on clicking them on business, have also remember its market values more value. If there's anything, I tried to teach people in life and in business both if you can do, rather than anybody else is doing. You will never have to worry about your own life. You have a meaningful life. You know that Every moment is happy in this life, but even happier I'm your face hurts. We need meaning that we need a sense of purpose. We knew that life is larger than ourselves that we're serving something- and I think if your focus is absurd, about how do we do more for others. Anybody else in business and life you'll never have to worry about it
so many things in those principles that I also was clicking off of the things that are my principles and that, I think, are also very successful. Lot of successful people's principles and, like I have a saying dreams plus embracing reality, plus determination, equals a successful like this is just like your saying, essentially that determination and you'll figure it out and when you just did a soliloquy that now that many five I don't know, principles and we gotta go back I'd like you to tell me what you were going to tell me before can you exact position making about this about decision that I just think we ve things we will share, as I think that one of my principles is the quality of life? Is not your conditions that your decision
and that any moment a time you can change your whole life by new decision that the power that we forget, we have a decision, that's real when you act on it does make it in your head. That's a preference, but a decision is like incision, you cut off any possibilities like I told people want to take the island burn the boats long as there's no way to go back to before the thing I say is you only have to do two things that are successful in life. You have to make the right decision and no with it and have the courage to Macon and then the question is how to get the right decision quit our faster better. How I do I give you an example: I got a phone call from then George Senior Bush charged H, W Bush Herbert Walker. Bush calls me up, and this is the end of the Cold WAR and he says Tonia. Thank you for coming out of the blue and science conversation says: listen. You know now that we ve seen the fall of the wall and fall of communism. He said we decided put a hundred people together, discuss for three days,
Where do we go from here? How do we helped to shape the world's eyes in a positive way going Foreigny says we are present meter on Maggie Thatcher myself, Mr Gorbachev and you ve been invited as one of the people, thirty, one years old and Y Y all has like those bloom. I wasn't it. Can you can't be dominated by removing the counting, of course, and I mean right so he says what we're going to be before me counter, and I say the new Orkut. He says it's. This was in Colorado respects. He said well, Mr Gorbachev in New York, you know, would you be willing to fly in their because now that's no under the Soviet Union, then I'll take care of him, and sadly it took me point: zero, zero once gets bigger out, I'm a student of history. I mean that lead. Do I get to spend four hours of creating the right hand of how the guy's an end of the cold war? I made about change, but I want to know what may that happens. I said, of course again so I said Deb. Do you mind when I be able we got
Joe coups on the other, and so I say it's also towards the phone told me to do it, and then I got a phone call later that day from my partners in the info, merciless never be at the mercy of business, but I didn't have a distribution channels to reach people, so I did it and it got me. President Clinton, all kinds. Was that value, so I have to shoot another shop and should these once a year and more than ten million dollars partners, and I and my partners have found a person whose I know and she's a great lady and she's use my staff and should go to the house, and so we had to date is the same as those applied to Fiji. Do and informational verses sit down with Gorbachev, media IRAN. You ve got to find out how to shoot the worm from our orders about it. So I said, don't look. I can't do that to do this thing with these guys. We should not have already agreed to my staff and put my counter, and they said there is. No the dates, but this is the only opening she has these four days. I'm like. I can't do this
the total level the lawsuit will this and that hurt you're a brand the thing so the phone. What do you do? I gotta make a decision, so I believe this is making. Everyone needs to be done on paper on your computer. It needs to be done in writing too much in your head. Secondly, decisionmaking just value clarification: we know its most important you'd make the decision, so what makes it hard usually of multiple outcomes are trying to get, and sometimes hard to get all of you don't owe the priority so you're mine, one one, because I want that. This is what I ll do. So I created the six that process really simple fear. Viewers, o o c m are oh your outcomes and we'll make a decision not to know what you're, after what you want, but precisely what you want, but usually want multiple things once a hard decision, so you gotta put him away.
We are of importance, so my number one is: I want to learn what changed the world. I can take that knowledge and help millions of people have left my brain. Where try. I want that experience. I want my kids. I've gotta give us once in college patients. I went to show them. They pretend we pursue a five minute, video interviewing, Mr Gorbachev. They get the coach them these kids on what to do with their lives. How coal is that now I gotta make information and I am grateful that helps in which millions of peoples I want to do that too, but I put any order with my whole list now. What's on the outcome in order now, go to my options are right, so I start running my options. Delicate when we first afternoons carefully informational deal. Whatever happens just go. Do this, which is that my emotion wants me to write my second one option is: don't do the IMF up go this thing apologize and I got the information cause. I'm commit it's going to cost ten million bucks. That's gotta! Do three million lawsuit, it's gonna,
set my partners not fair to them. My third either once my third option is- and I didn't wanna play at that time- our charter, a plain forms at least- keep my word and provide the plane from Mr Blair Witch off. That's not right to me, but it does make map interns. My earning capacity. Somebody got these doubts, I got outcomes and I got options now we go to sea consequences. So now I dont graph and on each one agog. If I do this, what the upside, what the downside and the upside, if I do this thing, I learned to you can change the world. You know my brain. The downside is, I'm pissed off, inevitably have a lawsuit, loose Brandon, not very acceptable. What the outside the other world everybody's happy. You get the thing done, but I miss out on this opportunity learnt so you get the picture
oh, oh see, Nagano. Second part. Gm are easy, valuing evaluate the probability of those upsides downsides cause you can make yourself not make a decision on what. If this happens. What's the probability minus ten plus ten miles down the worst painful stands a positive and evaluate these things. Madame de gondi start realizing. I can't not do the information and I can't in my got, not go do this so now you go to the mitigating and I look at and go ok how kind mitigate the downsides and long story short. I finally came up with ok afforded to shoot this thing. The same four days of this event, I have to go from New York to ally and then get on a commercial flight to overseas. So I have to go to allay anyway. So what if I pick up gorbachev- and I take him to the dinner- and I spent four hours-
how we ended the cold war and his perspective at least, and then I have dinner, and then I get on the plane I go on. I still have met everybody. I still have gotten the history and I'm gonna play. Will then I find out there is no plan. If I do it that way, they will get me to Fiji, so I did around furthers gotta be away while what other countries can I get too? So I thought get to New Zealand and I get another one of it's. A long story short figure it out and when its But I suppose I can do this in two days. Have this house be there a beautiful time for those first, today's I've waited z, and I do all this are jumped that ninety minutes or job I'll, take my dear or run like a crazy man for thirty minutes. I'll show addressed or get on. How are we going to see playing at my island, I'll, walk up the audiovisual material, sit down and film a thing I'll get it done today and I did all the above. I got everything done last part as you resolve. I resolve what to do. I resolved that's what I'm gonna do so now I get this great plan. So, what's really I get to know me Gorbachev I didn't want of genital
days eyes. The charter like little weird right. I need his whole team idea. Gulfstream public investment, forty grand for this thing, but I say to them: can I film this five or ten minutes earlier? We were them. Yes, twenty cars pull up. Gorbachev gets off he's, making some noise nurse now he's doing, and he waves away the camera and walked straight up under play- without even talking to me- and I like- the guy- was coordinated- we're going- because now know is gonna help handedness right now and you can talk That is why it is calculated that these guns all strategies, eyes or clothes like always, and his wife there right outside they're right outside. I think how are you attention on most men. You don't work, Strong, you know will probably, if I get to talk about something disagrees with. I burial chimed in some way. That was my own strategy, so I asked them all about the food so we have the balls of you. Do not hear what does
I can Russia now, I understand, are not taken care of him sure it out these nets. So once I got him engage, I said to myself got jobless, ask you? One question is my little cause for this off like I want to know what end of the cold war he looks at me and there is interpreted, I could see his eyes, he understood it was much more there's letting on right, so you could seize rising above the guy. We went to the former, it is, and he came back and gave me a standardized answer was obviously that's your million times, but it was interesting. He said it was the end of demonization he said, you know, you all knew the worthy evil empire we no evil as well. When we ended that kind of belief, structure, which is what we're dealing with today in our own country. He said we rather make agreements and change things. I said I wonder at the moment it ended. I wonder, on your mind, the moment ended. I'd really like to know that moment in history, because you're, the figure that did along with a straight present rate, is no one's asked me that question before us
ask you think about that. I said: well, you go for hours and we'll be her answer. I get him laughing so finally, he paused for a moment on every at this moment. He also the opened his eyes and he starts laughing uncontrollably. Melick like he was drunk smack initial is leg. I guess he goes. I will tell you says in Russian through because he said there was a moment. You said Mister Reagan was lecturing me on the evils of communism, and I told them you're, not my teacher, and I am not your student. You will not lecture me, and so I left him evils of capitalism, and he said I was getting more and more angry could feel my face. Burning, also angry and all seventy said presently gets stood up. Looking at this is not working and turned and walked away. Three steps. Inflict around with a big small space inside. Can we start fresh?
Why are you in a starts Ralph and like you are right now, because you had to love the guy. I said this is a man. I could do business with any Seti Reagan. Also. He knew that Gorbachev, love children and very evil empire. He brought these american children over, let Gorbachev escort them, for I was like weaker ten days and he said it just we develop this incredible relationship. All that came because I can make an effective decision concerning system and I use that system. I've made decisions that had negative consequences, but we ve built in medication for them. So every one of my companies, I really believe the growth we ve gone from little fifty honeymoon outcome is this year will break six billion across my thirty three companies, nothing of your caterpillar. But it's grown in its all, because we use group decision making. We use our best minds. We mitigate those downsizing. We come with our best options. It isn't always the right answer, but it's the best answer. We come up about time and if its doesnt work, we stepped back in and make a new decision, but I
I believe decision making is the most important element to success. That's the holdings in early successes, the good judgment, good decisions, you succeed, good judgments, result of experience, hopefully, as time goes by here it is you learn what I try to learn by other people's experiences, but often experienced comes from bad judgment. You you may Mr Eggs anemometer, the universal right, though skins, on your knees for this all the best way to succeed your party, you fail, you pondering pondering, usually come up with principles or in some other church, the challenging puzzle of trying to take those principles and seeing if we can make an algorithm man can you Imagine if we can make. I want to do that. You have put in a nap that I want to get in Africa. Also, they can have a kind of intervention therapists, but not of the Airbus, but where they can herself in the library, I think we can do that. I think so too. I think I'm just begin.
Courtney thousand, I'm looking for the right people. They. I can help you that Erika. I think I could provide leverage. What I'm gone quite frankly proved to be a very long time, but what I'm gonna want? The impact can well. We ve developed a technology which we call the coach and the way the coach works. Is that any time you have a question, a problem, you type into the coach, what your problem, this and then it direct you to relevant principles and are the deal with that problem because you see, if you just have your principles, you it's a book of principle. We are opposed to the law, not on it most peaceful use my book as a reference book and then they'll go back now. Let's make it easier, let's just make it that you type in your questions. Yes, and it gets you to the relevant principles. So maybe I'll show you what I'm doing one where we aren't the others. You create something from the general public, the S using the best of Airbus. Lady ass, the best invest, idea you gotta blank. It has been agreed with, you can say. May I thank you
furthermore, and re dahlias principles, life and work visit, W W w dot principles dot com- You can watch raise TED talk on how to build accompanying where the best ideas, when listen to some excerpts from the audio books, or simply order your own copy of principles. Today, the turning weapons podcast, is directed and hosted by robins and verification any. Is there an eternal director, an occasional host the pot cast his produced by carry song and other Culbertson Jamie carve a hot and Adrian Dilatory are additional editors, special thanks to die, and I call for a creative review. Copyright robins research international.
Transcript generated on 2020-04-04.