Rattlesnake Rest cemetery is full, and you know what that means.
This episode was co-written with Brie Williams.
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Transcript available at http://welcometonightvale.com/transcripts
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This is an unofficial transcript meant for reference. Accuracy is not guaranteed.
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Success is not final failure,
is not fatal. It is the courage.
to stand by and silent frozen. Horror that counts welcome to night
Good news. There are no more vacancies in the town cemetery,
Every single grave, crypt and volt at rattle
snake rest is field, and you know
that means no one
Those can die, I mean, but ok, death is still physically PA
the goal, of course, but municipally frowned upon. So
good citizen and hang in there, a net Jacobi direct
of night bills, prince of sorrow, funeral home, is already preparing for a potentially long period of unemployment. By taking a creative writing class at the community college. I've always
I need to be a novelist Jacobi remarked. She then add
with a tooth grin. I have lots
experience with plots
long silence followed, as her smile faded, slowly
we wish you all the best and at
Likewise Al Kincaid, the grave digger plans
spend more time with his daughter Sophia now that his evenings won't be occupied by ceaselessly making holes for decorated corpses. He timidly suggests
a family game night two which has done
older eyes and annoyance, even though she was secretly pleased with the new
who's that rattlesnake rest has been completely filled. I thought we should have a retrospective of our
favorite grades. Like all summit
reach, this one is located at the end of a winding dirt road and, like all cemeteries, the grounds or tangled with dense vegetation in the middle of a desolate howling plateau
It is a normal cemetery with
a chill in the air even on the hottest summer day and an impenetrable darkness even
brightest, full moon at night
the everyone buried here died somewhere else. Nearly everyone, the most
quoted grave in the cemetery lies at the southwest corner. It is.
grave around which all the other griefs were built. Instead of a formal headstone, it is marked by a gaping hole in the earth and broken wooden sign that reads: Rattlesnake mine, shaft,
team minors are buried here,
of them headless
to understand the history of this important grave. We go to the year eighteen, fifty one,
the new player piano when the Earl Street saloon was on its tenth repetition of buttons and bows the first few times the body patron sang along, but now no one could get it to stop and the song was putting every
when on edge it seem to get louder with each verse, more frantic with each course at least that's how it felt too saloon owner Thompson Sylvia. She tried to drown out the pounding cords with whisky, which worked, but it also made everyone sad and chatting talk soon turned to the topic of the missing minors. A group of seventeen siblings had come in on the train from nearby Red Mesa. They had been working their claim, outed, rattlesnake mine, but hadn't been heard from several weeks. Some folks thought they must have struck it rich and were busy kissing their numerous gold, ingots or whatever it is wealthy. Gold barons did no one in the poor town of night veil was sure how the other half lived, but they were certain that if they had gold ingots, he would not make sense not to give them some feared. Something tragic had taken place in that at some point that night, the player piano stop
abruptly feats glittering, sound, could be heard outside when Thompson and her saloon patrons investigated were shocked to witness
Mean army of skulls running over the desert toward them on tiny thrashing legs. It was a family of seventeen hermit crabs wearing the new shells they had discovered out in rattlesnake mine, some still hanging with ribbons of flesh the settlers of the unincorporated township of night build cited. The collapsed mine shaft was as good a places, a need to establish an official cemetery. They were already seventeen skull. This body's buried there was a higher concentration than any of the other random collections of bodies buried around town at that time and so rattlesnake rest was born. The ten blacksmith commemorated the event by constructing a wrought iron fence for the new cemetery featuring a beautiful decorative.
and lay of a skull wearing a hermit crab harbinger on the front gate,
listeners. I've just been handed some breaking news
locales, brisket sliders are back sluice smoked for thirteen succulent hours, topped with aged Buddha, Crispy, onions,
The key sauce and Mayo had Arby's for a living.
the time only. You never know when you're going to show up. You never know when they're going to disappear again and when they do disappear. You dont know
we're coming back there here now and windows. Here. Everything just feels right
is that good enough for you kitchen
live in the moment. Don't ruin
things by asking for a bigger commitment, lecture
her hair down and get wild with smokehouse brisket sliders only at Arby's, and only when they say so got it
back to our retrospective of rattlesnake. Rest opposite
old, mine shaft is the grave of the town crier it's a month.
Grave with its crumbling, had stoning faded, latin inscription, clamour of interim EST, Viv Us Est, claymore.
Which is supposed to mean crying is living living is crying, but I've been told
by my niece Genesis, friend Marcy Militants Catholic School, that it
actually translates to something more like cry. Creature is living outcry. It doesn't make a lot of sense.
The term choir was a tortured individual employed by the city to walk aimlessly through the streets ringing. The bell and weeping openly
after his death. Many residents
They could still hear his sobs floating upon the early morning, air and in a large crypt at the back
shrouded by a groove whispering lies the map Alia family them.
Leah family owned a very important video store annex inside the Ralph speck in the nineteen nineties. They also kept a melted view, just copy of the movie powder.
displayed on the front counter to warn people against keeping videotapes inside of hot cars, lest they incur a fifty feet, have never forgotten that valuable lesson.
Listeners. A breaking news update the armies
drive through is closed until further notice. The same too
You'll Honda Civic keeps entering and re entering the drive through ordering and re ordering these smokehouse brisket slighter
although he's ordered over seven hundred sliders and counting the driver,
expresses how hungry is during each appearance before frowning glance
nervously at his watch and there's no Arby's
packaging visible in the car, the cash
you're, theorized that the driver identified as Jim Sailing of desert. Dr he's stuck in a timely and has not actually retained.
any of the sighters, despite each order
being successfully charge to his credit card after the employees expressed concern for ceilings plight everyone
together, free breathing on the situation may be. The pity
feel for him is wrong, suggested shift
managers, agreed Borg, who was recently awarded employed the month for her positive attitude and dove like white wings, with which you,
because the source through the golden after the skies
maybe getting to order his smokehouse risk
its lighter after such a long absence from the menu was the happiest moment of his life. Ford said and now
gets to relive that moment over and over again as it for the first time.
the employees huddled up, chanted, softly and broke apart
sufficiently motivated to continue selling sliders to sailing that he will presumably never get to eat
our visas advising that all other customers please come in
by the restaurant ordered this time, and thanks for your understanding and now I have here an exclusive excerpt from best fangs. The
coming why a horror novel by Nightfall Funeral home director, a net Jacobus chapter, one
the outskirts of town. There was an old dark house.
Everyone said it was abandoned, but clear, dumb
on a swore she saw things moving past the windows at night, not just things a girl, maybe even a girl. Her age
clear was new in town and all she
we wanted was to make a friend a real friend someone,
He could have sleep over sweeter than make brownies with and danced to walk with Clare
was the child of a funeral home director and the old
We guessed that were ever invited into their house were already dead. One day
Eve with desperation, clear, marched up the crumbling steps to be
old, Dark House and rang the bell. A girl answered, told and pale.
with long hair that hung across her face lit up the girl, ass, softly, barely looking cleared the eye
clear explained that she had just moved in next door and you
wondering if any one lived here ha the tall girl said.
I guess you could say someone lives here clear. Laughed too, though, she didn't understand the joke
she needed a friend and a weird friend was better than no friend at all.
That is still shopping to publishers. If anyone has any leads, oh and if it helps a net,
creative writing instructor at the community College wrote pretty good on her last assignment. Once again, we wish you all the best and that more breaking new
the night, though City Council is under investigation for misconduct, leaked survey
Its footage from the Arby's has revealed the city council soliciting a free, smokehouse, brisket slighter endeavour
YO, which has gone viral. The cashier is seen refusing the request from a single being with multiple forms and heads which is clearly than I fell City Council. I meet their art
the other entities who beat that very specific description, except for thee. Mc Reynolds family over unease, Bedford Road, but the Mc Reynolds are weakens the cashiers refusal prompted the council to tap.
their collective chest several times in a self important matter. The cashier.
Declined serve them citing our.
He's constitution. Article five section one which, as we are
learned in seventh grade civics rents. Arby's
who has the power to declare war inter alliances with foreign powers and disallow free sandwiches to government employees? For any reason, the cashier sees fit barring a two thirds vote by shareholders
The city council became belligerent yelled, the
a sauce packet beneath their fists wept, ugly,
use cashier rapidly. Blinked,
and out of existence and eventually fled the restaurant, dragging the
estimates. Many heads and arms behind them
The old then shows a baby raccoon entering the restaurant through the open door eating, let us
perhaps underneath the table and falling fast, asleep witches unrelated
if you haven't seen the video, yet you really should check it out or you can just go and under the Arby's I mean
Still there I've named it honey mustard,
and now more on rattlesnake rest since
the cemetery has been declared full. We all been freed from the bondage of certain death. Of course, there are few people want exactly happy about this. Let's look in on them now
like real feudal, director and net Jacobus gazes out the window at the abandoned house across the street. Unlike the character in her book,
She has never seen anything passed by the windows at night, except an occasional bat tapping at the glass eating bucks.
publishers are interested in her work
to consider self publishing, but the thought makes me feel like a failure
delegation is important. The kind of
allegation she used receive when she did a nice job wanted deceased loved ones, make up bore track down their favorite flowers
the service or played a flawless rendition of wind beneath my wings on the pipe organ a net, MRS funerals and the feeling shoes to get from them that special connection to the community that once filled her life with purpose,
meaning crosstown AL, can keep the grave digger loses. His third can,
active game of scrabble to his daughter. He can't spell he discovers
and doesn't know very many words. He spent most of his life
digging and he's never needed. The written word for that Sophia is a great speller.
Al learns that she's been winning ribbons, spelling these four years after school and he's proud of her, but
He doesn't know how to say it. Instead, he just grunts nods and gets dirt on the furniture
as much as AL enjoy spending time with its border
there's more tension between them. Now that he's more Sophia is used to having time to herself and our MRS working with his aunts just a moment ago, I'll dug up the entire
backyard of their house for no practical reason, this infuriated Sofia and the two are barely speaking right now
I'll knows, things cannot go on like this much longer. He calls it
My colleague funeral home directorate NET Toby and the two talking hushed, secretive tones long into the night, now
whether chest full still see the face. You gave me you mine, so crazy, others.
mark your calendars, everyone this
began. Rattlesnake West Cemetery is having a grand reopening chock full of giveaways discounts raffles and a book signing by
because self published author and Funeral home director, Annette Jacobus freshly gleamed, like new plots and creates, will be offered at bargain prices. Oh and cake walk,
featuring the confectionery of local, celebrity chef, Earl Harlin with pastries.
So fresh. They
still have the salmon bones in them.
We can only come on down wait a minute. You might be saved yourself. How do great
just become vacant. All of a sudden aren't they supposed to be our
resting place on this earthly plain. Like
final. Well, the gods Workin, the steel
Swayze with their gnashing teeth and glittering eyes and long silky mains gnashing their teeth on their sweet apples and cute little heaps of oats eyes glittering because they just love oats, so much majestic creatures,
honesty and might be thinking about horses here, yeah my religious studies coursework and for each club activities. Sometimes they run together. Anyway, I asked
Jacoby out every single grave tomb encrypt in rattlesnake rest became empty overnight
Reading the secret and just like manifesting things like crazy. She said
self help and magical thinking really work. You know she. Then
deliberately avoided eye contact with our the grave digger, who was standing near by
face hands and cover all completely kicked and dirt
been obey? My daughter learn to play scrabble how blurted without from
that's why I'm covered in so much dirt. He barked still looking at the ground. Ok, sounds reasoning:
I said, which is the motto of all good investigative journalists. I then boy
six raffle tickets, I'm really hoping to win that Starbucks Travel earn fingers crossed, don't go
to describe lands. Added with a shout. I was planning to. I said
He said just a bunch of lumps of recently upturns oil out there to stay home and ignore that place. That's my advice he concluded and I could see his pupils shaking. I said so: cool a net chimed in interview. Well, listeners. We are free to die once again. Death is scary paint.
Impermanent, but it is,
right as Americans, I for one
I am glad it has been returned to us the possibility of
mortality, was nice while it lasted, but he was kind of a lot of pressure. To I mean I did
even realize it at the time. But now I really feel like I can breathe again, oh and if you go
to the scrub lands. Make sure you avoid the giant mass of permit grants really taken over that part of the desert stated
for these scattering of a hundred tiny legs weight,
down by gleaming grinning shells approaching rapidly in the dark
oh and reminder from our sponsor that these smokehouse brisket slighter is back at Arby's, but it is no longer foresail not to the light.
Have you, anyway, good night night, veil, good night
Alien theorists, theorizing is a comedy podcast where the alien theorists theorize about space aliens, conspiracy theories and the supernatural new episodes every Friday, listen to alien theories, theorizing free on Spotify, Hey Jeffrey Grain or here I've had a therapist for years, and they have helped me.
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welcome to night fell. Is a production of night fell presence. This episode
It was written by Bree Williams with Joseph Think and Geoffrey trainer and produced by dispersion the voice of nightmare.
Cecil Baldwin, original music.
Desperation, olive, it can be found
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They say you shouldn't meteor heroes and Joseph think, and I like to introduce you to I only listen to the mountain goat, the show where I mean my hero and have conversations about songwriting, art and life. This fog has his. Will you be weird for me because I'm proud of what I do, but I always try to change the subject of people. Tell me the myself. If I only listen to the mountain goods, find it wherever you listen, the pot casts acts.
Transcript generated on 2020-11-15.