Though, the alright. Let's do this, how are you what the buggers, what the oh, my god, oh god, what the fuckers, what the fuck buddies, what the? What the fuck is in my throat, god damnit. What just happened, geez. I could I think we should keep that. I don't think we should add that out. That was real fight. What Maybe I'm the idiot eating a large body of airport popcorn before I go on the mike work? The show a mark marin is w e F, that was inserting an jarring. I'm sorry, folks, I'm sorry if that right, if we didn't ease into this properly, but I think you felt the emotions of that I clearly almost was in, trouble there and I'm not. I withdrew,

never was in my throat there. There is a small victory in whatever happened at the beginning of this episode in, in that it's the way we want to go out of the of this year and into the new year when we want to. I am beating death again. Alright was maybe wasn't that bad, maybe I'm over am overplaying it a little bit. What is going on, you haven't good how they today's jason nash day here. the show jason nash the comedian, an actor and writer jason nash, whose movie jake. Nash is married is available on itunes and amazon. jason nash, I've known for years, and not not a great relationship on my side, not something as always irked me A little about him, I have always felt that he was aggressive and hot,

though so going into this interview. That's what I felt an assumed, even though we brought gifts brought juice brought stuff. It was a it was a contentious, an end, engaging interview that really hands on it was old style, old style, w style, F, stuff. For I do anything else before I say anything really of any worth. If you consider what I say worthy are worthwhile. Season. Two of my show marin is on netflix. Now, as of yesterday went up so if you didn't see it because you don't have, I have see you now, can we season to have marin on netflix too great season, lotta great feature, performers cm punk, huh, wick mikey in black caroline re, Sarah silverman joey d as Oh sir, Paul big neighbour,

it sees in their sally. Kellerman and judd Hirsch, Josh brenner, everyone's back with some very funny people, To help it along marin season two on networks, now What we're? Where are we alive? I'm hard time today, man, I'm having a heart, Finding the will to talk the will to do. Sometimes you just get sucked out sometimes you wake up and something has come in the night and just locked. Your will at your face right through your orifices out you, here's a nose a mouth instead on it the wheel, suckers thereafter, their invisible. They come in at night. They are, they usually travel with the other night creatures will suckers. Are all apparitions there are known to ride the backs of possums into the night under your house,

Beware of the wheel, suckers! That's all I'm saying sometimes does not depression. Sometimes it's got nothing to do with a god. Damn ghost come in and feeding on your chee, why you sleep? call me superstitious, call me whatever you want. I've had some weird thoughts about this shit. Lately, people I've had some weird thoughts about god. I've had some weird thoughts about technology. What are the things? It's always annoyed me about about p We believe in god is, is when they pray or they pray for Monday. Things like a parking space where they work or perhaps for a certain thing to be on the menu where they enjoy eating, for you know four four mundane petty convinces am, I thought is that. Do you really believe that god, if there be such a thing

as time for that shit, you think that god, it's time for everybody's widow, sort of like I gotta, make sure she gets a parking or try. I always had a problem with that with the idea that god he's going to waste time. When there's you no bigger issues at stake, most of the man made most of them most of the problems we experiencing the world are direct results of human beings being fucking idiot. Of one kind or another murder fucking idiots raises fuckin idiots non caring, fucking idiots, capitalistic fuckin idiots just be a fuckin idiots human kind. filled with fucking idiot does, in god have to address that stuff first, but I always had this issue with the mathematics of it. Good god make time for your bull shit when it

its are ruining the fucking world. started, and then a guy named mail nine email I was online and something was suggested to me based on something that I looked at online time. They, the mining of information, personal information that is then used to. to exploit your desires and perhaps provoke you to buy some shit and that to everybody who is online, which is most people, and I thought to myself what Jesus Christ, if they can fig figure out techno. we have to do that. You can tell me that god can manage a parking space for for me If I ask for one may be given day, you know if men I can pull it off and in service of our little desires through at through programming in order to get us to buy things or serve. sorry desires by paying for things, and we have to assume that if there is a god that yeah, I guess he

and look into the menu at the place you like to eat or perhaps a find you a parking space. I'm gonna go ahead in naked concession here and say that if god has time or if he's paying attention, in the full hearted way he might be able to help you out with the little things and the only the only reason I'm doing I'm saying that is because technologically we seem to be able to fuckin. You know, get the when people shit in a very intimate way. With fairly limited information. So if technology is either Surpassing god, or at least it's on the same playing field. If you believe in that kind of stuff, you gotta believe in technology, because that is a given and it will fuck you and if you believe in god, then that is also a given and he will fuck you shit

Yet the thing doesn't in well for anybody. Merry christmas happy new year. The writing for marin is coming along. I'm writing my script. We all have our scripts to write Do you know tat television writing works only given the I'll give you a breakdown, this outworks, because we everybody rights we sit around in the initial phases. I come up with a bunch of stories. Then I sit down the guy's me Dave, Anthony savoured, glaring, Michael Jackson, john Russell jerry stall, Dave Anthony I'll sit in a room, and I came up with a bunch of stories- they come up with some stories. We matthew stories. Together we decide what the stories are. Then we we parse them out and- we break them down into a three x structure as a story? and then we write a one pager and that sort of the pitch of the story and then someone gets assigned the script and that person go

often rights in outline, then we all go over the outline and then they that it goes and writes a script. Then we all go over the script paid for it page for page and and make it funnier or or or fix it or do things to it or or or flesh it out or whatever needs to be done. Then we send it off to the to the production company. We send it off to the network. We send it off the studio everybody gets or copy. Everybody gets knoweth unease each other sets of notes come back. We put the screen back above, left and get under it and start retailers figure out. While we can be dip attic and honour notes. So these things go through a collective rewrite They go through a series of nodes processes, but every he's coming along fine, I have to write the script that I've been assigned this season, and I I you anything but right when I

right. My house gets very clean. I make our popcorn I cook squash. I do things I clean out holes in the ground, but as it is gaps that involves my ex wife, so maybe its emotional. Maybe not maybe it's just my process media get away to the last minute. Maybe I got it just hate myself to want to crawl out of my fucking skin before I do any creative work merry christmas happy new year, ok, jason NASH! Now jason nash strap in those. Up on drop in which dr jason nash attach happiness. The success. You know no really care about that at this point. In my life at this point in your area. Its

and beaten out of you yeah. I don't give a shit. It means nothing to me as this podcast means nothing to me. You know if you, if being here, means nothing to me. You can get me out now see. This is the general thing that I know about you is that you know you say these things that should have a sense of peace at the core of them. Yet it does not know. I am I really I've gone to the point where I live. lies. It's all not important in there's nothing someone can do to me. That's gonna make me happier or less happy. You know yet when I saw it in inside job as they say. Have you heard that expression you mean you're, not gonna, get happiness. External, like nine eleven. Yes, there's a conspiracy, that's taken you down from the inside

Its rumsfeld had apart, no just your parents, usually yet arts there, but I love no need for a long time. I remember when you started coming around I remember you were sweaty. Your hair was longer is was very hostile right away, since the minute I walked in I know hostile. I'm always a little hostile with you. We are not at all. Always Are you also with all the guest? Now Now, then we realize your hostile with no wonder I'm not hostile. Now there was a bad schiller hostility. I like it, it started with I'll tell the audience hey, let's get to you you annoying fuck, that's. I started right k and I I brought juice, I brought a gift and even then it was like you had it planned. Thank you for the juice. Is this yeah go ahead Moreover, I don't know I'm. I think this is the best part now brought. I have my own baggage

You know, I guess was me, I'm not much, ok nodded to get any man. I dunno why you would have any now. There is not a problem between us. I don't I find that there is a problem between us. five minutes ago now now that not even that, that's it I'm just being cranky mark you not unfamiliar with that. You know. You know what I'm capable. As you know, my my so now you know me kind of you know that I can be a little a little irascible. at times? I really do know that and when people would talk about you and say I so grubby so irascible, I would say now these doing a bit he's doing a bit he's a comedian mean? Are you could see at your route that you have a lot of humanity right right? So I was just doing a bit kind area as it was the annoying. When you call me annoying fuck. That made me think I did something to piss him off, as is the first line, but

it's all. I am just bustin balls. Can I do that now? Can I assume that that intimacy with you, since I've known you, since you were child, it feels like you're right you can. I do I thought you can absorb it. I mean first thing you ever said to me: what was it we're alone, a lounge and you go, I you know anastasia very years the lower east side sensation. Really. Lay I've, never all angry number, one that I had something something go well for myself, I was so mad that someone else headed and I set so you so why reach rise did annoying fuck. I thought I thought you had, because I will I thought you'd totally grown. I've got. I know I know you have. I listen to the shop, but you know it's like you and I are locked in in whatever happened there. That was the last time we exchanged words. Maybe because I know a couple of times backstage your worked.

Was he may be. I have a hard time you had me on your show at alive. Show right. Maybe I have a hard time I do I do your yelling did good. Actually I've, never did very gay. I've never had prepared a joke or two about elan and it didn't went well I'd I've, no recollection of any that happening for you but I think that was one of the I I can discuss my exact issues with you. I guess, if you you know, if you want to do that yeah course, some times from the very beginning. I think a years ago used to do a preacher character than you yeah. I remember that by, I used to do a lot. It was almost like. It was a character that you were locking into right, like you are like that guy for awhile yeah right it was like. were this was like that? Will young euro every side sensation you did that regarding was. I call you did I

those things, but that was the thing that sick people seem to like right, and so you, you sort of became that character forbid yeah and I liked it. Okay, I think my initial reaction was like. Oh it's a preacher character. I know I know yep. I had my problems with it too, over your problems with it. It was a preacher. but you know you do try to figure stuff out. I was like Sorry I live. As you know, has an assistant and you're like I wanna, do Maybe I don't know how I couldn't go up there be myself. I was afraid to be myself. Not innately. Bothers me. Wouldn't bother me more than. I worked on it a lot and dropped all the characters you mean it would bother me that you bother you then or bother me, I'm just trying to track it. I mean I couldn't. I couldn't go up there and beans If I remember the first time I was, I say, I did like twenty minutes just telling people

myself it was necessary in a stir that funny there were to have any part right, the next morning. I was like, oh god as greatest. That is the greatest thing that I have ever done. Good feeling and we have the space and time and was afforded us. Don't worry side to do that I believe this was in a way just about arms have been along in the preacher. And I realized was like pretty happy and Thirdly, the other problem. I have an abide. There were moments with it that were glorious now, closing stella and people loving it. hey! I got a feeling. I am. I got that feeling I have loved me. Yeah or to be able to go up there and ignite them with something. Sharp chirac's. I certainly wouldn't go up there and ignite them the way. Gilbert. knights crowd oars. You watch some one kill me now. I couldn't do that, but I could What did you do that because I was

skilled stand up, owes a character. It was a character that was yelling and it had music behind it. So the man behind it combined with the there. The yelling created like of an awesome. combustible thing, but you want to be a comic alike Before any other means, sometimes wouldn't work yeah Then I remember it was killing in new york and then Stella brought me out to do and ls show yeah a bond, bad feeling the war and then I tried to, but we've got to go back where the hell did you come from, because I remember you, you were there sort of not exactly the beginning of luna and but you, you, all of a sudden, were around the lower east side. Everyone liked you, kinder than you

do the yelling preacher guys a word. You come from where'd you grow up. I grew up in boston united in the suburbs yacht which suburb medfield really again out nita med film and have, as a now with my moms and needing a really rises aids and act in a real everyone's over there. He at any one you mess amherst notion and my senior year when you graduate college. I thought okay. So what do you like forty five, forty one I don't know where your mouth is, but I think you're reading into this, I think we're you know I was just trying to set a tone and we're backing up from a pizza or some party must hold onto it. That's what's interesting is there's some party its hold onto it. And then a do at luna, How long do that? A long time? I can feel that now It's true I've. I've been listening to your show and you've. You do a podcast here right now. Don't do it anymore really. What happened was too hard to hard to talk on the mic like that tip tig? Technically I get it out and stuff. It was just.

For me. I couldn't do both, so he went to umass Amherst. He you majored in what communications meaningless. Yet, okay, you have siblings, you have the oldest sister. She saw awesome. She's, a very peaceful person is at her job. Now she works in computer. She just got like a nice life going for herself heads. Ah now, no kids. Well, she has a stepson, she's gay. She married just stepson now she's like she's, she was the real funny one grown up near. What were you tat kind of serious? no. I was fat, he was lonely do, my town really awful. I had a bunch of kids I had like friends in school, but they take they like terrorizing they would like right like jus on my car, you might have. personalities where they're just sort of like you know your your everything's right up front with you and you just kind of want to take a shot. You know yeah, so the jew thing was just to have a means of entry. A portal

I believe, a bully poured through you, billy I was not too much because I was sort of clever. Thank you and I have a bit of a bully in me, yeah, so like I would. If there were bullies, I would somehow tried to our outsmart them and you would you just start bullying somebody but I think that, like not like what happened with you when you walked in when I said yeah, I gotta deal with you. You you annoying fuck yeah, I dunno. If that's bullying, it's kind of up front but it is antagonistic and pray. actively offensive, sometimes mites my son going was like how do I get the upper hand quickly? and an without causing too much trouble you're just sort of like me. I feel good that you had the upper hand quickly with me. No you never, oh no! I I had the upper hand before you got here. Okay, when are you coming to my house

yeah yeah. I don't know what you mean. I mean I don't feel like. You have the upper hand that much okay, yeah yeah well see. I I'm glad that you've you've taken whatever has happened in your childhood, and now you have boundaries and you're protected you're, you're you're ready to go like unite. This guy is not going to fuck with me. I I, I think, that's great yeah. I expect don't don't make me feel when I walk I, why would you I didn't? I didn't expect some sort of mental olympics here right hey. I didn't expect that at all. Do you listen the show? How do you think you seem to really like fun over everybody and really like everybody, trying jason I'm trying to find out. I really am. I don't need you to I'm happy to go at it. I love it when going it yet we sort of our

now we're we're having a nice discussion about how your boy does about asking, and then you asked me if I say no, if I was boy, I told you the truth about it and then and then you re an idea, and I said like about the upper hand and said tat they might be used to like them. I and I remain example- and you Greg. Do you think you have the upper hand here and I made a joke and then he sort of took it then, and then you were like uh. I don't think you have the upper hand, see like you said that you said like on the. I don't need the and need it, but you send down right. You said that defensively because I might have said something is this about the message you I'm beyond my dad. Did you listened with a bit? I sent you to listen to the preacher I I sent you a bit. Is this about? The bid I say, probably not, which I don't get- is the bit where marisa that Where was about it was about refresh my memory, always about not coming on the show, and then I was saying that I, how I defend you and how I like you are you. Are you

was an appeal yeah yeah, so you did get it. We are pretending. Like you didn't. I I don't remember I busy okay, you know and then now now it is we're going about and I and I saw like wow this guy really wants to come on the show. Of course, I do yeah from my movie. I know you do. I got several calls about a movie insisting that I watch a movie good and yesterday I said I dunno if I'll have time to watch a fucking movie. If they want to move this sing up a few days yeah, we can do that and you're. Here I just got a message that said tomorrow, be here I don't know anything about that. That's right, see you have people in there. I do your people, That is out without you, don't normally deal with people. I do nor video people by the fact that they like to add that I have people now have people but they now you don't think I'm on the level have people might think anyone thou that takes his money. So the note

at press time, beckett bothering him and he had no idea about it and what that just means your people are doing good job for you right and so it was. It was bothering you as annoy as I fuck this guy. So that was the annoying fuck. Migration is just say: that's my people say you knowing fuck monkey tom. I won't do that. Unlike what they're doing like them, bothering you fuckin, making you irascible and making a good episode for the show it is it's it's gone pretty. Well, I don't really well. I watch a movie because your people bought me and as I've known you a long time and because I was like I may be done something. Finally, yet for his sake, I hope he said It's something. As you said to me, I've been waiting twenty years for you to do something that you said isn't yet when you said that to me was when did do that

If you got parkinson's was maybe a little. Fifty am busy. I have a lot of things going on, so things are so bore you're, so busy huh, I'm a little busy like that it's. Ok, it's a little welcoming. You know because, like I never understood how people, responding emails and she had her liking. Organised get mad about it but like You literally don't have time to answer. I know there's not even a matter of time. You just forget them yup they just go by and you're like oh shit I mean, there's four emails and you can only get to one right Yet in the one who takes up guy immediate attention. I know I know when I e mail people, if you would allow me back, I don't take it personally. I am happy to see you I'm happy. to you! I I will tell you that watching you do. The podcast is just so inspiring it really is because I knew you- and I knew you were somebody that was waymore town did then, whatever was going to you bright cassio.

You would go on. I fuckin going to watch you now lot of people that go and watch right right. You know Patrice O'Neal's an hour ago right, gilbert, oh yeah, I'm going in and then you go on and then and then to watch sort of watch. This blow up you know gave it really. It gave me hope, if I'm being totally honest and gave me hope, like I'll fuck, like a is for me now, it could happen what happened for him late right, I dunno. If it's weight happens when it happens, remember, let's get back to his spiritual you from the beginning that you know it's going to What happens in that that you know that the idea that something happening later or not happening on on time or or or having at all you are all horrendous fears and eventually get you surrender those fears and maybe it will have a movie. You know to mean that I don't know it just like. I am not vat zen about it, but I can't it happened one

happened because I was ready for it to happen. I dunno that I was ready for it to happen before I dunno. If I could have handled it, I'd had other opportunities that didn't go anywhere. Who knows why at the time you're like fuckers they. You know why they give me a chance and then, when you look back at stuff, is like what would have done with that opportunity no. No, no! You never brought you to what you were doing now, I never was whole enough yeah. I brought some version yet I think you have that issue as well. Oh yeah, I'm terrible anything. I think that what were got me sort of them where did out about you as you like, you're one, these guys that you tried a lot of things. You did a lot of characters. There is sort of that there is a lot of attempts at ridiculous near an absurdity. Any of the characters and that kind stuff and I we saw you. I always thought that you are incredibly aggravated under our. I mean I know you're nice guy near pollyanna here, but you know you here you're kind of raw emotionally and and allow this stuff's started to feel will desperate

and then like later on. We are too you got married. Then he found some source of your anger, which is that thing and work out for you yet year and if you you're in a pretty good life, but it was not if you wanted, you know, you're, like a house, has been yo a debt daddy? What you know like what you call it? Mr Mommy kind of guy. I am, and I became sort of point of view. By was honest and genuinely seemed really almost two furious about it. And then one of the last few days ass I was I is is sympathetic angle. I wonder I wonder how people are responding this like this guy doing all right, but, like aegis, it's like me, Why why my kids, you know like way but under If at all, I think what I saw in what became sort of, like not judgment

in terms of like not, I don't like you, but you're desperation became so intense. It was difficult to bureau is that possible. Why don't know if you. Were around me at all to be around niger saw you chose right there that was a visceral union. They actually hanging out no, no, no for that. But when you say that as to desperate to be around what does that mean like, I would get uncomfortable with your beards. I vowed be with you too also. Why would I wanna be on stage you are uncomfortable? I am well listen. I've I dont see myself as and up you. I go up there to work out. An aerial nine, oh, but I'm just like we are were any those feelings we or that just an act. I mean: did you feel as lines? If I wrote, I'm I'm a terror, I'm an absolute error could carry you now, I'm a fuckin living nightmare. You are aware. No! No. Mark I mean what they are

it wasn't on more did. I know you're you're here. As you know, we're talking and you feel better about things and you eat, but like just telling you that, like my in the same way, I may have bullied when I was younger. My my reaction to you? Is it just slightly self? active, but I don't really know how to do that, because I am not good with boundaries. So, like my sort of posturing with you has been to protect myself cause I'm very sensitive and you get in yet you know and that's why I am, hey this job from whatever, like fury that was like, you were trying to manage. My fury would come on you out. Don't you? U again very sensitive now, why would my fury ever come your way, not an no? You would directly at me, but just the vibe of he just didn't, want to be envy around the vibe of it yeah. Why? Just like, I thought, like this guy's about to pop was wasn't afraid, academic, mine, popping baby it was more some sort of twisted concern. You I knew you were first rate for a lot of reasons. Then I know just the fact that you know

May I go I don't I don't try to be a stand up. Why? I think that you wire stand up and you do try. I tried, but I'm done now I mean I and donna here I fucking hated yeah. I don't like going into a room and having to please a bunch of strangers. I still like it. If you don't do stage work anymore now, I'm done really fucking hate it. When did this happen last year? Really vulcan done I hate I hate. I hate just waiting to go on. I hate the sort of mentality that comics only talk about like this bananas I hate the idea of going to bananas, it doesn't sound. good to me, the idea of being on the road. I do. I do like the idea of going up there in getting material, but I don't and doing well with it dad excites me but excite me like go back the next night and have not do as well right the job the at the job. It's too but I get a lot. I got a lot of it and then I got like all my oh, my

folks that are in the movie. I got that from stand up. You know those are stand up, Jos, array or stuff that I can figure out that works haha. I got that out of it and maybe I'll go back to it, but I'm not focused on that. Now, I'm trying to make another movie yeah. What's what's go back so, okay, you come from. Do you understand that at all you had to because I know you're a fuckin, you been doing stand up for a long time, understanding exactly I like I want to live life like here I was out. I was in size extent of new york last week, are your new york. I saw ridge vastest on the street and I'm a fan ahead and Bonnie and I walked but a hey. I've been calling into their show, and I told him in here proceeded to talk to craig get gas about the bob and tom show the entire fuckin time and I wanted to light connect. when I talk to you about what you do on the weekend. Has you kid how many kids, you god and he just there and he bitched about, and I called them. This is no secret. I call on the radio shall I call them out. and I mean I told them. You know I was angry about

and its society. I don't like that. I want to have a life I want. I want to know, and I don't like go up in couching things. This goes too. who speaks to what you're saying I don't like couching things for the audience to like it. I get it all. I don't like like when I want to stand and go. You know what I want. I want a big fat woman, no you don't you dont want a big. that woman, you know what I mean, that it that's a lie, and so it's a joke. Its untruthful l, like a joke, my now it's not you ve seen that. oh I don't. I don't hear it like that. Maybe it is a lot of times people tell jokes. While I don't, I don't see the joke there. I guess I'm humorless in that one I mean what's the rest of it? like I'm just more I'm just knowing where I want to make that why dont member I mean I'm making here you're out at the set up,

do I know you're driving that we're married another guy does an anomaly that there was an unjust modesty. I dislike things are more real more like this. Why, like the shell, which hope you're right? Why me I do that type. A stand up. You know, but sometimes you you you know exaggerate- is a device or embellish embellish I like, for instance, was just take the premise of like I want to be fat woman here. Maybe that guy a couple of weeks ago was on the road. He was one lonely and he had sex with a big fat woman and he's like. Maybe they prefer to do it, but yeah, but it happened and it might have been really fun, so the rest of that joke could have been based on the experience he had with what was fun about that. So it may not be a general truth like it might not be his wife's end to an a big fat one right, but you know we've all had that experience and that there's something not there's something good about it. He may you may not want it, but you sometimes you're surprised

to add to I the point I'm making is. I understand your your anger and your frustration withstand and now I understand that you, you seem to be a little in between in terms of like you're angry about stand up and you dont do it anymore, but now you almost, angry that you know that you gotta live life, you want to live life, how you gonna, do it No! No! I don't think so at all the settlement and stood up? No, then he says it's like it's not like. I want with life I don't want to sit in target rich vos about bob and tom show about his work problems. Yeah, I might want to live life. I want to connect about kids. I I can't I don't have time for this. Guy I've known for years, who had some work issue on a radio show concern. I have known him for years. That's the thing! I've never met before. I know a measure, a fan, but sounds a little judgment. I mean the year years, though foolish you don't want me so foolish you're cool coming at me. You just being

the cereal you're, so full of shit. You know exactly what I mean, I'm defending stand up, you know exactly what I mean? You know you? I know exactly what I mean wanted. They can have a child, he didn't have the time or using a different place, and your these were now. He went on in a different place. E e was just fuckin going on about the same thing with gregg ass, his friend yeah, you a guy. He kind of nose. Yeah needs to connect about his kids. Now I just would love to fuckin talk well, that's you know, and he was in the middle of a conversation. Rich voss isn't the problem here. The problem is just I'm just saying in general, I don't love, you know the same that that life Ghana live that guy, that's it! So what now I was hard, though it's when you were working at snl, but everything is anger. Am I you know, I am angry, but I'm not angry about ridge was I mean I'm not. I know my angry about not. Instead of you asked me a question. You are angry. Recording stand.

I wish there is such a part of me that wishes. I could do it here, but I can't do both. I can't I'm not I'm not that good. I I work very slow and I am like my brain's all fucked up, so I merged your brain factor. I think I did too many drugs did you, but was it fucked up before? I was never that the great multitasker or any one of pseudo prolific, eighty d thing yeah. I am and I'm unlike some medication, now that's good, but rarely which one it's called adam lambert eugene, yeah yeah, it's like like lamictal. It's a mood stabilizer, it's really good. It is ah yeah! That's. Why would you prescribe that we have depression? Yeah, like last year I had a toll breakdown like I was going to bed at like seven o'clock at night out of headaches at night. I couldn't I couldn't function at night. Someone would talk to me. I'd just be like, like I would go out in the day and do my creator.

Staff do vines or whatever and have the best time and get so high on the creativity and then I would use crash. I think I have like no adrenal blockage. my brain so then they gave me this thing and it's I was high for like I was high for like a month haha and the minute I took it. This one took two weeks. It took five minutes. I was at a bowling alley party with my son and everything just just like when just as a wash like all bowling ball. It was really something it was good. That was sirleaf yeah and there was a weird thing I dunno. If I should look this up in my nostrils, there was like a cold euphoric thing in my nostrils and so every time I would breathe, then it would be like breathing in like right, fuckin and ecstasy. Gas are in that went away. So what else is going on you I for that time them a year ago, host to get the movie out in the movie was done for like a year. Are you married no you're, not gonna. U still mary! Here, ok,

cause. I remember you said to me once after I did stand up know like even fucking you're going to get divorced, you better clean that act up or you're, going to get divorced. Aha you're, just looking at the time waiting for this to be announced on to Texas the sea. Remember what I said so I said that we're in reaction with only had a few exchanges, but now, but they resonated and then something I know you listen to the show and then you thinking you're going to get divorced. If you don't clean your act up something like you know, if you keep doing that kind of material or was I bet you that was that was it that that dump that dumb party show they used to be upstairs downtown, I bomb there. I think it was there We so were so viscerally angry about in some of that in the movie. But let's go back so you got a job. What out of college? et cetera and I live. There was an intern like the last year, Adam sandler and Farley were there and then I got the job in set september with when norm, as I got a job is like norms assist

Oh really here, and how did you how'd you get in over there? You just applied at a different lied, really eyes went up and looked took the internet programme and lake trade whenever they said Adam. He murmured. I shall now address now and at that time, you want me Alex Sulkin were interned but you want to be on snl yeah ye audition. You did hear the zach, oh yeah, you jump through all the hoops you in galva noodles. yup. I remember I was about to go on. I went on after zach and he walked out and they the talon executive, chased him out, just as he did. He had done so well off that horrible marcy marcy coin yeah, that's her,

experience when you're waiting to go and yeah waiting to go on then I go on and I I had a cd and I get up there and I go hey. I I got a cd yeah and they go they just stare at me for like what seemed like five minutes. He needed it to do your bit the preacher bit. I dunno what it was. I think it was this this Jim morrison bit. I did oh okay and do they complain? city, no second factor the gate. Them get hurt me and then eventually, a sea player made its way to the state as as like you all and I warn you were making the noise of the city no in my brain, everything slowing down and I'm just looking at lorn in he has just expressionless cause. You know you know they do that trap fuck with you to see what kind what you can do. It is rarely originate in the studio yeah. That was the first audition. Did you meet with long, Are you just said that one another man and it was weird cause? I was already I'd been there. I was of the reception as the year before

so you knew Lauren kinda barely just walked by. He was always cool, though yeah, but that was the end of the audition process, I was at and I and I did okay there they kept coming back like ruth and kept going. If you're in the mixture and the mixer and the mix with answer kinda yeah wow, We have been doing this while I still with her now. I have no idea what happened holding me back, I mean I'm. Maybe I am now in her power. how many years ten so that we're thinking where working like what ninety six year, ninety seven! Yet so then then your life pocket youngest, are doing a comedy because at that time surf reality was around that, though Luna was going still there doubtless down their weight or pianos and inserted grew bigger. Like I'd laughed, I left in two thousand and one and you are still there

and so you kind of evolved with the all seen in new york as it spread out too. vps in everything- and I eleven I was here a really you already know that your area out, so you really live and where my wife, my group and my ear, really a contemporary of mine in terms of the timeline of comedy anyways. So ok see you do in these characters. You doing morrison, you doing the preacher, your general juice down there luna stuff you're making friends with all the guys. And then you meet your wife. I alchemy her a shell for fox I'd like to partners MIKE and Matt. We have the guts sketch matt price yeah that prices in the film who I worked with briefly on what I'm on the american version. Oh, never mind the buzz cox Oh yeah, remember here we do. I share, though view is like the set panel of right, and you are right in that was like two thousand,

There's something you're good at that I wasn't didn't go now is not good at night. I wanta did you I thought you were a good. I think I think I think you're good at everything you do you good actor, I'm every single piece you did. on my friend for the internet was big. You do like all, at peace like Andy Rooney near has real good I did a lot of memorize, but you are like standing over area like a mountain you're standing on a mountain? I was doing like a three minute piece that was memorized. It was funny yeah, but it was one shot right. It wasn't like cuts. Is that the possum piece I know now they cut everything, I've. It's like here's, the thing well banana bananas being bang worm, but yeah. No, no, you weren't doing it that way. Yeah I did some stuff but yeah, but the price was I I was okay with the hosting, but I was a little. The tube We are in the middle of a divorce at that time and also needed money badly and that's. Why did it and I'll citing quite understand the game is what to think does your recognition of my anger come from your anger yet course, oh see, that's why you

gop on it more than everybody. That's why you're gonna protect yourself cause, I don't think everybody's like I gotta get away from that guy. No, I mean Exactly it's creativity, it's not like! I don't you know, I don't I. I know that. What are you angry about? I'm just like it? It's something! That's I'll! Tell you but now it's it's a lot. I am angry about mindset. A little intangible in the sense that I think it comes from a very young place and interested it's it's the way. I'm it's the pattern. I have chosen to exist it, sir, Anger in a weird way is just a faulty pattern of of taking carry yourselves Well and it's hard to shake because it's it's sort of deep- and you know it has to do with expectation for me of something that probably is, is not going to come in the way that I needed to come. It's a it's, a very young thing afterwards

finds you in your dear ditching it now, you think heavy ditched it. Why we're right more so now I mean I've done some stuff in terms of white. I think that you are having some success does help in terms of self esteem. Special units on your own terms- and I think, also like being sober for fifteen years, has had some effect, but just recently, I'm starting to look into yet even deeper core issues of really what the source of it is any figuring out. Practical way to to move through it. Your mother and father is that one of the reasons why I d just yet just emotional negligence. So what what were they when they around, for you they were there around with their incredibly self involved. Ok, where they enter like therapy and where they live. not really order the advanced people known as they were just now. They were just sort of like they had their own in securities and they were both kind of vision their own way, and I dont think that the

emotional nurturing that is required for a child. Was that forthcoming, though they did play as if they were doing it, but emotionally kind of register that? So if you sort of go through life, you're craving that nurturing you know from the outside world, it's not going to come, especially if you they have made the assumption that, because you didn't get it you're kind of a fucked up part, and then you have a bit of a beef. Did you get it? Did you get that from girlfriends or your wife? No one can give it to you. You don't believe that you don't believe that you can get that from your mechanic air from the outside now, so you think that fucked up, I don't know if it's fucked up it's just it is what it is, and you've got gotta figure out how to kind of grow yourself up inside possess. Really what I've been doing. I'm been trying just grow. I gotta get on great with my wife. Now you know, but My father was like pre, violent

like not around and sort of a very macho like boston guy. What do you do? He did all kinds of fucked up shit. We will first have a business that was amazing. The average your business in his partner got shot at murdered in the middle of the night. They had borrowed money from the mob while in die in that just fucked him up for the rest of his life. How could it not here he wouldn't he wouldn't he couldn't get back to where he was nowhere higher him, but he also like wouldn't take a job at a gas station right cause. He was thought he was too good for it, which he was and da. So he just starved and fuckin war yeah we kicked out of apart, manson, really yeah and so homeless and not homeless, bled the go live in my grandmother's. I should like to add here and then my mother, she really stepped up. She got a job. She became a makeup, lady like gloomy, hans. Just chestnut hill, oh yeah, rule nine yeah so we would sort of you know I'd go in

it in the make up counter way for her. Thus, on my childhood, but it made me very unevenly- is much my left him a vegas split. He just was like he was one christmas, he was just gone real and she was fuckin really distraught. How bulgaria I ate You know any man and he was he was so masculine. You met him. You'd like this. A fuckin basque I ever met were over character. Oh yeah, yeah, look, I got here, deniro, a little bit. Six three ma am and he was so macho, and I wasn't I was so fuckin What's the word, I can use a family affair it and I'm not gay without you know you want me to play football when I was five, I was like fuck that beat the sensitivity out of yeah different kind of guy here, and I just wasn't that guy and a remember being very like adult, young age controlling his anger,

you are yeah monitoring, you know, try and a temperate lay hey who did or you go with some of that yeah yeah, emotional you're, erratic father, oh yeah, if you spill, your milk and they'll know what rip your pants see, what we've gone you're walking around and you don't know what the hell is going to come at yeah, so you're always kind of like oh yeah fuck like let's just get through this right, let's make him happy so get hit right. He now yeah and and not to say, wasn't a loving guy, but he could be loving and then he apologized for all like one one arabian marthas vineyard, how he did so. He comment ass moment. Aurelia was right about now. I say: let's go get a beer and I was like: oh, I don't really drink, but I'll go with you. You know again, not, may I know you're, not a fuckin

Thirty, nine really yeah, and he just said I you know I am so sorry for your all, the all the stuff I I fuck. He couldn't even finish the sentence cause. It was so mighty said I I fucked up yeah I fucked up, and I said it's okay. You know it made me who I am today it's where it's the place from where I write from it's the place from where I get me from yeah, and that was it, but his gurus could hear him say it was satisfying yeah made me realize that, like when I yell at my kids or something or five min asshole, you just go say you're, sorry, right away, I'm so sorry! yeah, I that that goes so far. I realise that we owe you but we hope that that doesn't become a pattern.

At some point, you'd like to sort of like I'm not going to yell and don't tell me how to be a father mark. You have no idea, I'm just saying in general, you're gonna have kids. No, why not miss the boat, dude, neat and kind, Not at all. It's ok, you sad about that. Now in I almost how kid I was thinking about it. But to me it's a am a very anxiety ridden person- and I am a relatively its frightens me, my brother s, three kids, but like I am if not gotten my anxiety and panic and volatility in a place where I would feel I never felt like. I know really thought about having them. That's an event should tell you sound, but when you have than that, allow be forced out of you. Ok, I think I greatly can't you just can't spend that much time on yourself anymore, I like I was, was go where you have to take care of you like. If I threw you in the army or someone through you in Afghanistan, you be like ok with burma,

If I can avoid avoid being thrown into Afghanistan, why not choose that yeah? I think it would. You know, as I dunno maybe he's on a mission say this. I wouldn't say this to anyone else, but you go ahead but I would never tell someone. I have kids really ard, and it's very late, but I think, for you would be really good for you now. that, because you know you get great material, Obviously, and it would just changers the scope of you and may be taken. Sure take off some other selfishness, selfishness. That's one word anxiety, yeah self hatred, yeah, that's limiting it's a little less! You don't have it anymore. No, no, I do read, but you know I it again. I'm sort of getting word comes from a little more self hatred, weird thing, because you know, after a certain point, you're like. Why am I even doing that yeah that doesn't fit?

Colin Quinn said that once he as I grow, knowing you're depressed and you're, just like depressingly isn't no one fucking cares and you know he isn't. Then you stop it's so funny, because your points of reference you know coming from the alt comedy community are big. You know: mainstream real comics. I just been listening to like satellite recently in a hurry. I don't got a comical say more, so those are my references No, no! You don't you like germany. I do I like all kinds accommodate I'm a comedy fan and your comedy performer him They may be not to your level not to your liking. I didn't see any of those, it did not say any of the things. I say I dunno. Why you're, assuming that I I told why I was uncomfortable with your performing style and you explain to me early on. You knew what was going on with the preacher character, but I did not say any of it.

It seems to me that the voice you have in your head is horribly critical, yeah, pretty yeah, so you so your dad. Still around now yeah and your mom yeah, my mom's, a saint she's fucking best yeah, yeah, both jewish he's, she's jewish he's christian, aha, but he converted did he yan and went back to the church. I guess you had to convert back then yeah, oh, no, you didn't. Why would you have wanted to have lots of tell me that that he had to converter is sort of like well, maybe that neither her parents made and my mom's dad. italian. He converted interesting something here Everything sort of leveled off, but but like the fundamental struggle that you have your father over your skill entity in over his anger that stuff that sorted, defining yeah.

Well, then- and you are also the this sort of weird preemptive defensiveness- I think that's also something we share as well as that when you have a father, that's volatile, you're, constantly ready to you, know to either be diplomatic to absorb it or to defenders as totally fight or flight. Did you like, where the? Where did you ever have those kind of fights where it was like shit flying around gotta get out of the house shit, no yeah or the other thing that I realise in therapy was like. I dont think people want to hear what I have to say, because I would talk to my dad and he's right yeah yeah anyway, you know I had a trial with the patriots once you know he was like. I was trying to tell you something, but I guess doesn't fucking matter it's heartbreaking to cause. You said the exact same thing about stand up. Yeah. Well, no, I I I feel, like people want to hear what I have to say, good, you know when I, when I'm being honest,

really talking about what it is just. What are you doing here in own that spaces? The heart ya, like that in a like. I think, that's another thing. I felt that their your approaching the sort of the the d, the stage what sort of liking- in a year I you know, I keep your eye on assuming that any set there they're, either gonna, yellow, split here or start about themselves here. that energy I got a wholesome. and then I sort of to speak to what asking to speak. You said before than when I became a dull and I wasn't working fuck em, my father asked fuckin. So that's the curse cause that was like. I had this moment had a moment as he was our visitor. Alas, I got this thing. I got this thing that might might have in you know you will be staying here. A year ago, I got a thing I gotta It's a property in rhode island- and I said my god I fucking am I'm the guy talking about it

but the sadder part of that is- and I have my father as well as at the here you and then, immediately shift over them to sort of compete or one up or validate themselves yet in that moment, where all you really wanted. Him was to say: congratulations yet, urban and then you have the other side of my mother who just believe anything. You say you know it's gonna have, and I know it's gonna happen for you. I just now it is I'm goin on like twenty years, the best you're going to do it. So you can't even you begin not to believe that yeah. You feel bad, like you're lying, like you're, a photographic attic too I'm not on crack anymore or or what that you know that it's just not true right? what you're saying is more garbage yeah, I think there. pipe dream. There's a line in the movie. Wish I go. Are you suddenly and up you're afraid you'll end up being one of these people. They just throw about doing it.

There is nothing worse than a someone who talks about doing something and then you realize it fuck. That's me. He felt very sad jason well. You know I'm going over sympathy. I am. I'm here I'm happy with my medication, I'm not giving his into the unjust, acknowledging the eta like one letting the audience know that I'm not but known. Assuming that it's a the because now because identify with it, especially that the the self absorbed emotionally erratic father thing is it's just it's horrible to say to like it just a lifetime of of of unrelieved and and reciprocated love, and you know in in constant vigilance against you know. An emotional attack whoa heavy right here and then, when I got married, I was like. Oh you are you just living with that you're like? Oh, I'm a man, so you have like your dad. Saying your man in there now these standards, so I'm

living to these standards, which no one else is a modern world now right, but a man this man does the right you now here and I still Those in my head were yeah and I'll see you just. You also have the sort of role model as well. You know that the your dad was a foundering dude yeah, so but you, but that's the interesting in difficult situation. You got yourself into in that Are you married a woman in show business who was successful and chauvelin yes used in good as exactly and do you know made a living, and you are struggling to make an in show business yet and by you. I think, because that became a great father and guy have a relationship with your children, that's enviable to most men good. I try hard, maybe you're there all the time I was there yeah, which is nice like when I hear about a comic who's gone friday to Wednesday. I think I could. How could you do that? I can leave your kids, it's vr

yeah or and then also with my wife, like being so close to success. But not there were no. I didn't every day you weigh rap you wake up with it she's gonna work work. Shows when people you know for sure when the casting comes in. She goes we're thinking about mark marin, man, price blind in view. I didn't hear generosity produce We think that it was against or emotional self interest to cast you Yes, she didn't want to mix. I don't want. You just asked what I like it. What do you want? just as understand it. Ok I'll ask why that is there. Emotional self interest is like you know, someone's gotta work and I'm the one working and you know- and there is good for the kids- have apparent around as much as possible No, I don't think she's that devious I mean, I think I just she doesn't liked her you'd have to me

if you really like her she's, listen, I know you'd lorry right marny. Marty Montgomery it was. She What was your wife hartman Marty? Heartening? yeah you're. Probably gonna marty you'd really like her, because she I think I have said she likes you. She always liked your comedy. You guys are both jewish and but anyway, she's she's, just someone who's like that. Reserved very on point. Exactly what needs to be done and how to do it I'm naughty have zodiac, follow, replace our work so well. What I'm hearing is that you know your frustrations grew to a point with performing and with you know, just your lot in life, and you know these these, these dynamics, with your father and all this other stuff, and eventually you just you're like fuck, I'm gonna make a movie. That's what I'm going to do this I'm done this shit twenty years in and this stuff is exhausting. It's not really yielding anything, but I

I've got a lot of friends. I've got talent and write a movie about myself, basically and having me being a divorced, fell it twice. I was interested in concerned to avoid run like tv. I hope being can get divorced. Gonna do every day but there's a lot of great people in it captures always good t J miller who I like as an actor What do you mean? You don't like him as a person, I dunno we, we is great yeah he's he's super nice very funny. but it he turned down in asia now known just getting? No, no! No! It's! It's always a little odd with us, but I think a very tough guy that prices air people highway, the written you're in it. Sorry, I andy rachel Harris she's go apart. Boards in short, allows good scene.

I didn't like I m by what's your buddies name, the guidelines in the obliging x rays and all the sounds like you really liked it. No, I liked it. My problem is fundamentally, it's even apply, I have a particular reaction. Do you think that's what it is? I think you I think, It is not about we actually between identity. We should talk ever again. No, what we ve established, here is that we have more in common than then we would have known before. Yes, but I feel it is any bridge built we what we really want. Only what do you want to bridge we're having a conversation and even even even now, I'm fuckin wide open your resistant now. I can't believe that, just because of the way, this conversation started that you know you, you would still take this position.

and say to me: there's no bridge bill, I'm wide open. Now, I'm not now you're yeah. Amber uri, you know what will happen nothin I am happy to be here and I'm I'm I'm really actually liking the episode. I feel like it's very honest, and actually feels good to sit across from you and get the real deal, holyfield I you know. It feels good like it's like. gotta here and now this be better look. He asked me to be honest, and I'm glad I wanna, hear and understand that the leap from selfish, too you know the guy could potentially be a good husband, was a will a bit of a jump for me. That's why. Why is at a jump because, like I want to care of my wife. That's all I I know, but there are scenes in the movie where comes out. She got you do in a contest and that the boy

as you know what what? What? What kind of money do you get him like a toe baggage, and it also so like? an honorary line. It is a growing lines great joke, but but but in in in there is an element of it. All that is obscure, the idea that all I wanna do is support my wife and kids, but you also want to be big in show business you're trying we finally want to join. I want to do it that way, because otherwise I ve been a miserable, so am I wanted to take it and I don't think you can. I don't think you're I don't think your understanding what its I have to support a family that, and also to be underneath someone that you, look I met my wife and I didn't really want to get married, but she was so great tat. It was like I should great, and I know I made the right decision as I'm still whether they were going out tonight and I'm looking forward to it and so

I say that in the movie I could I can't get a job in a bank now in forty years old, but the idea, here's to theirs then the issue is again. Don't I love this by the way? How can I do is that its very set? that clearly in the movie she's got money. She wants good, that's not true at all. You know that. Do you know the television business it's fuckin offer to I'm just talk, but the reality of the movie when one right it sounds as we're going to redo the kitchen right she's not going to do that. If there is no money there, and the fact that you know you are married and you get a thirty thousand dollars. I arrest dead, the attic was at an nowhere. The aim that sort of an issue so that dynamic, isn't like what you grew up with. It's not like. I gotta provide for my family because you know we're all eating cereal all day, cassettes on board the idea. is more of an ego thing in the sense that we know is a thirty thousand dollar dat, nine other you know yearly have so that's that

that's something! No, but I'm saying that what's establishing the films that she's de breadwinner yeah, it's not uncomfortable situation. No, it is uncomfortable uncomfortable for you personally, but money no she's sitting down building a dream books is not remodeling the kitchen she's looking at things she's working, she has enough. I'm just saying that the world you created is a lot like the world. You live in yeah that it it it it. It doesn't reek of. Like you know, if you don't get a job, we're we're going to have to leave this house right, so I mean that's not in the movie, but I but saying the idea. The idea that you are presenting me, which is like all I wanted do, is do it, so I can support my wife and kids. They were being supported on some level, You want to do to validate yourself as a man on a lotta right creatively professionally.

in the eyes of what you think your expectations are: it's it's just multi, dimensional and and what what I said for me is that that just becomes it's not even a matter of confusing, because it clearly This is what the character is, and he part of the movie is that you don't really. Ultimately you don't know what you want. You want to be happy, you dont want these possessions These are the things tat, make a difference But you know that if you could just get them, it would make life at least easier for your wife, but you even fight that and that he doesn't want. I don't want possessions at all. I mean this clearly in the movie she's asking me about things, and I say what why are we going after these things are not going to make us any happier right, but. I bet they might make her happier, That's why I need a job and that's that's. The whole crux of the movie that he's trying and failing and trying and failing you ever it seems like you're on-

Two different pages really mean the wife. but that's ironing guys hunting. I urge is it like that. I really was attacking movie. I know no, no! I know I'll. I love this year with you, the only person that has gotten into it with me. I like it. I really do, and also the fact that you haven't been divorced, like gum they didn't want to medieval. I don't want to be divorced. I don't want to know how, to a time when my kids yeah, but just you know, but the the nuts and bolts emotions of really. in thrown of your house having. no or having been left

and you talk about you, sir I've been through that you've been left before yeah I have to it's devastate all I know I know I was. I had a girlfriend once while my friends thought I was funny. She never laughed at one thing, and I remember I said during the last day: isn't you you don't think I'm funny at all? You've never knows it. You. studio city. Do you ever see my ex machina yeah now now she lives there and I think she lives somewhere later yeah yeah. What happened and you're married the hours? I was bad. I was just to hard to deal you just a deck here, kinder and you're angry and caustic india down she found a good. Do, got some kids, you gonna write, you think I don't we don't talk at all. She's good. Do you want to go over to the other side and get kids? You know showing wanted you're done. I don't I just I'm just I call it the other side. Oh I e. I just don't see it happening.

I, you know, I'm not white, not on principle. What happens when you meet a woman? Now you do tinder or anything like that. No, no! What happen when you go to a shower. I'm gonna need a woman or something gonna, little cynical yeah. You know I've been out, I had a couple relationships where I was almost going to get married again and have children, and then that turned out to be not a good idea. Why'd, you pull the plug and I just didn't trust the situation and you know I because at my age and where I'm at I need to know that someone's really fucking going to be there to do. You know what I mean. I can't take care to be there for what to take care of themselves and the kid and the kid cause. You're gonna be gone too road unknown, oh you mean so did the women that you were involved with. You thought where maybe a little fighting you couldn't countenance not going up there and not quite flighty but yeah, but there was an element of not we had the urine business, if you want to be taken care of or anything like that, just fifty fifty, I don't think she can hold it up a little more than fifty I'm going to need from her

Can you say you want to seventy thirty that sixty forty, my oh, my gosh? What another? Very bold of you to say, I'm fifty did what does that mean? It means that when the kids are in good shape your face and you're nice and skinny you've got a nice body on you. You got a nice head of hair your hands against her own tv show sixty you know it's just a practical thing. You know it's a very sad thing that that didn't work out yeah. I understand why that matters Urged and mark out, don't seem sad about at arthur and click. Ok, ok, at the marriage in your ceremony having kids a little bit, I'm not sad about the marriage. I understand why that didn't work out. I'm the I'm sad about the relationship that I was in not working out for in the way that it did. We talking about moon right now, no known side. That was that only lasted a few months. there are good president, yet that is the best she's. The best know she's a great person. He ain't just was not emotionally right. Get me like. I like it was one of situations where I'd idealized it and really believed that like does not work out there, but I know her

that way- and I just I couldn't I couldn't make the cut for what she needed emotional here just wasn't happened. Many idealise somebody second really turkey, which is a matter not knowing yeah. It's like my way shall go set up dan with rachel hey it's gonna in never, were you don't it's never it is hard enough now you just can't do and sadly have gotten bit cynical, but I think that spending time, work on. She shit is not a bad place to be young. I'm seeing somebody a bit No I'm not shut off to it, but I'm very scared. So You know, because I have the same thing. You do I united, because when you come from parents at her emotion, we demanding and volatile and selfish you wanna be accommodating, and sometimes you know you risk losing yourself a bit and and the anger that comes from losing yourself and also not being able to help the other person no matter what you do is horrendous,

yeah, you ve gotta, come in from all sides, don't you inside I ever come here. You ve! No idea inside you gotta come of all sides. You are so I can, I can't tell working on it, but I can't tell if you're an unbelievable mass or if you ve got a good hold on it, never get yoga gut and blew in one area messy. Let's go yeah. Then we. What do you want? That's right I mean you're only wanted to be perfect. It's now about what we want. Is that, like you know, there's a lot of things going well, but Sometimes you don't exactly know what to do here. I mean I guess I could it has given up. My career and given up the idea making films are doing up and is good. I feel like I feel, like you, ve got a thing were by feeling: clearly what I'm gonna take away from this, and it's good to hear is that you never liked the play, I worked for him in comedy now

the same thing, with the characters and the same and then the scenery, a theme with the movie like gas. While he's fine he's gotta he's got a house the wife who work. So why am I watching this? That's what I took away from what you said: crazy, okay, yeah. I am I'm on a two hundred milligrams. A day like we talked about a lot of stuff we talked to at the similarities we have emotionally and why I had a hard time with you. Ultimately, beyond the preacher, character was at your anger It's too visceral for me yeah and it may, and I have the sensitivity to it and it made me uncomfortable yeah, but I did realize it was honest, and you know when I said to you that thing about your wife is. It is that I knew that some of those feelings were genuine and that you didn't necessarily have a handle on them and they were mixed with a certain amount of fraud. some of the feelings bijou what you can be operating at that level of anger. If all those feelings were operating at that level of anger, you shouldn't have been married, so my

reason enough for responding? way. I did is like I dunno. If she knows what you're doing but but yeah, that's that's serious shit and you seem very unhappy. So that was why I said that it was a sensitivity. Thing was not like. Like a comedy was reading to me as comedy and n n n n. You said yourself that you worrying about whether the audience likes you are what you can do, something that they're going to it. You know laugh at or like It became straining for you because you wanted to be honest, so there you are, you were. I was reading something honest and now you're telling me that okay, so all those feelings were real and they were functioning at that level of intensity and for me to say, like you know, I'd be careful, somehow was an attacker diminishment of your comedy, but it was just really me being sensitive as an angry person. why, when you said to me at the comedy called I didn't, I wasn't offended Y know. What I'm saying you is that whatever age is framed, you're gonna leave with from this conversation is your own shit. You open I'm telling you that you stink so like ear what I said

We ve had a fairly thorough conference. I think we need a good conversation and I I've just that's what I thought and need something that I certainly want to look at, but I think that we established if anything throughout this conversation was. The reason I have the reaction to you I have is because I sense what's going on deeper, I do because I have a going on in myself, then you might need to be accustomed to people sensing. So that was my discomfort. It was not you know. Outside of the preacher character, I I did not diminish where you were coming from comedically as we come from somewhere place or at least desire to come from miss him replace yeah. I guess, as same here. All the stuff you're saying in his like you're missing a a chromosome it up. You're missing a m, a sensitivity chromosome a little bit where I'm waiting and again might be me.

I'm waiting for a guess, a bridge. I can't I'm waiting for some sort of ain't. I don't feel it. I don't feel I don't feel usually with now nine point. Nine percent of the people that I come come across even if their critical, if they're bluntly, honest with me, there's a the guard gets down and maybe its cause we're going back and forth, but I dont like even when you say, I'm coming out you I still feel connected with you or that we have any kind of. You know, goodwill, okay with me or similarly yeah, I'm going to listen. Ah you know or I'm sorry yeah. I fucked up. I fucked up good talking to you you're talking to

mark. That's it. That's our show the listening, I thought it ended well. I know it was a tough one. It was. It was a little intense. I know I know we. We have an intense singing in that guy as I said before: jason jason married ashes, marysville one idea, amazon marin my tv show. The second season is now available on netflix netflix. I just had chest pain. Just now. I've just been attacked, wow. Okay. How are you alright? We good but just happen. on the mouth, And and

about this the like that I pocket and boomer lives